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1
00:00:02,919 --> 00:00:03,919
He died.
2
00:00:04,599 --> 00:00:07,999
Dad gave me money in case we
need to go down the IVF route.
3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:10,479
We'll do it naturally
ourselves, promise me.
4
00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:11,719
Well, if we're doing
it naturally,
5
00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:13,799
the acupuncturist says
I need a different schedule.
6
00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:15,319
Mum, why are you being so weird?
7
00:00:15,519 --> 00:00:18,518
I think we just thought
that there'd be more tears.
8
00:00:18,519 --> 00:00:19,680
I think I'm broken.
9
00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:21,680
Why aren't I crying?
10
00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:24,838
They sent my boyfriend
that questionnaire.
11
00:00:24,839 --> 00:00:26,918
It's just going to make me
sound like such a monster.
12
00:00:26,919 --> 00:00:29,679
Why does it matter what a bunch
of addicts think about you?
13
00:00:29,680 --> 00:00:30,999
Although you might have
another panic attack
14
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:32,318
when you see the state
of Rachel's room.
15
00:00:32,319 --> 00:00:34,040
How did I not see this?
16
00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:37,080
Helen, take me to Harcourt Street
right now or I'm going to scream.
17
00:00:37,519 --> 00:00:38,559
She lied to me.
18
00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:40,039
She didn't want to upset you.
19
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,119
She think I'd never find out?
20
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:42,719
Aiden is dead! He died!
21
00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:45,198
He's lying in a morgue because
he was stupid enough to
22
00:00:45,199 --> 00:00:47,799
go and try and collect
you from some pub or other.
23
00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:49,879
I really need to talk to Anna.
24
00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:53,399
She blocked me.
25
00:00:55,480 --> 00:00:57,278
How could I have been
with you last week
26
00:00:57,279 --> 00:00:58,480
and now you're gone?
27
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:33,360
Anna.
28
00:01:33,559 --> 00:01:34,559
What's going on?
29
00:01:35,959 --> 00:01:36,959
You okay in there?
30
00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:40,760
Anna.
31
00:01:43,879 --> 00:01:45,080
What's going on?
32
00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:48,680
Mum!
33
00:01:49,919 --> 00:01:51,120
Mum!
34
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:55,198
Anna, love, you're up.
35
00:01:55,199 --> 00:01:57,238
Have we got any rice?
I don't know.
36
00:01:57,239 --> 00:01:59,400
I don't like it.
Yeah, mum, that's what she asked.
37
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:01,000
Here, Anna.
38
00:02:01,279 --> 00:02:02,279
There.
39
00:02:06,599 --> 00:02:08,638
Sorry, Anna.
You were in there so long.
40
00:02:08,639 --> 00:02:10,160
I thought you were
killing yourself.
41
00:02:13,839 --> 00:02:15,040
What?
42
00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:17,278
You were in there for ages.
43
00:02:22,959 --> 00:02:27,440
♪ Hey, I,
I wouldn't let him in.
44
00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:35,680
♪ No, I, I wouldn't,
I wouldn't let him in.
45
00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:42,238
♪ His eyes are close together,
and he wears a toothy grin
46
00:02:42,239 --> 00:02:43,680
♪ Don't let him in.
47
00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:50,039
♪ No, I wouldn't if I were you...
48
00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:51,879
♪ Let him in
49
00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:55,760
♪ Ooh.
50
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,839
{\an8}Girls, you know this
is just a spot, yeah?
51
00:03:40,319 --> 00:03:43,278
{\an8}Maybe less alcohol and pizza
is really all I need.
52
00:03:43,279 --> 00:03:45,679
{\an8}No, no, no, no, no,
this stuff is the best.
53
00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:46,878
It's not even out yet.
54
00:03:46,879 --> 00:03:48,999
You know Anna's doing the PR
for it and everything.
55
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:52,080
The launch is going to be huge.
We got Chanel Blanche to attend.
56
00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:54,839
I have no idea what that
sequence of words means.
57
00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,879
Rachel, that is
actually pretty amazing.
58
00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:02,598
I know. My hairdressing
experience came in handy.
59
00:04:02,599 --> 00:04:05,039
Who knew? Four hours is
hardly experience, but...
60
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:08,440
It was exposure therapy, okay?
It did the job.
61
00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:12,958
Girls, this mask is
getting a bit tight.
62
00:04:12,959 --> 00:04:14,719
Is that suppose to happen?
No, that's fine.
63
00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:16,759
Yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't like it.
64
00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:19,518
Well, Rachel doesn't like walking
around with a spotty boyfriend.
65
00:04:19,519 --> 00:04:21,519
Easy.
I didn't say that.
66
00:04:21,879 --> 00:04:22,879
To him.
67
00:04:23,639 --> 00:04:27,399
Anyway, I would love to hang out,
but I am off to meet
68
00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:29,040
the love of my life.
69
00:04:29,279 --> 00:04:30,958
Who is definitely going
to break my heart when he
70
00:04:30,959 --> 00:04:32,559
eventually moves back to America.
71
00:04:34,839 --> 00:04:36,879
{\an8}Not everything ends terribly,
Anna.
72
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:38,159
Thanks, guru.
73
00:04:41,879 --> 00:04:42,879
Is that nice?
74
00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:44,959
Yeah, it's pretty nice.
75
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:48,839
I suppose a ride is out
of the question?
76
00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:53,160
Come on, let's go.
77
00:05:13,319 --> 00:05:14,000
God!
78
00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:20,239
What are you doing?
I'm cooking.
79
00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:22,440
Yeah, no, I got that.
80
00:05:23,199 --> 00:05:25,000
But I'm on breakfast,
with Neil.
81
00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:27,558
We need to get in here like...
It's fine.
82
00:05:27,559 --> 00:05:29,519
Look, I did everything.
I just...
83
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:30,918
I couldn't sleep.
I couldn't sit still.
84
00:05:30,919 --> 00:05:31,959
My head's just...
85
00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:33,559
Ugh, so full.
86
00:05:34,239 --> 00:05:35,319
Morning.
Hey.
87
00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:37,638
How long have you been up?
88
00:05:37,639 --> 00:05:38,680
Oh, I haven't slept.
89
00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:41,879
Yeah, I really need
something to calm down.
90
00:05:42,199 --> 00:05:43,958
Half of this is freezing.
We can't serve this.
91
00:05:43,959 --> 00:05:45,238
There'll be an uproar.
92
00:05:45,239 --> 00:05:46,999
It's fine. Just reheat it.
Look, it's perfect.
93
00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:49,760
Look, I baked fresh bread.
Come on.
94
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:51,160
Come on.
95
00:05:51,599 --> 00:05:53,559
You're putting me on edge.
Come on.
96
00:06:08,639 --> 00:06:10,319
Fierce busy in the
waiting room, isn't it?
97
00:06:10,959 --> 00:06:12,800
The Under-5s clinic
is always manic.
98
00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:14,440
I'm six.
99
00:06:15,879 --> 00:06:17,559
Mummy's a bit delayed
bringing you in.
100
00:06:17,919 --> 00:06:19,839
Yeah, sorry.
I was getting divorced.
101
00:06:20,319 --> 00:06:22,000
Oh, that's okay.
It's all in the file.
102
00:06:22,639 --> 00:06:23,680
They have a file on me?
103
00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:26,199
No, on Kate.
104
00:06:26,639 --> 00:06:28,518
Her vaccines and
developmental appointments.
105
00:06:28,519 --> 00:06:29,879
Just we keep note.
106
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,799
A few things actually
need to be filled in.
107
00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:34,160
It's probably from when
you moved back to Ireland.
108
00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:37,040
So when did Kate start walking?
109
00:06:37,239 --> 00:06:40,599
Em... Well, she stood up at
like...
110
00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:44,239
Maybe when she was...
111
00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:49,480
a year? And then I think her
first steps were 15 months.
112
00:06:50,680 --> 00:06:51,838
Or maybe earlier.
113
00:06:51,839 --> 00:06:53,400
Maybe it was 11 months, yeah.
114
00:06:53,639 --> 00:06:56,799
So she stood up at a year
but walked at 11 months?
115
00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:58,518
No, sorry.
The other way around.
116
00:06:58,519 --> 00:07:03,000
Stood at 11 months and
walked at just over a year.
117
00:07:03,279 --> 00:07:04,479
Right.
Sorry.
118
00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:05,638
I'm terrible at these
questions.
119
00:07:05,639 --> 00:07:08,159
I should have brought Maggie.
Is that your partner?
120
00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:09,839
No, sorry.
My sister.
121
00:07:09,959 --> 00:07:14,599
Maggie looks after me while mum's
at work or tired or hung over.
122
00:07:15,519 --> 00:07:16,838
Real sense of humour this one.
123
00:07:16,839 --> 00:07:19,079
You were at the weekend.
124
00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:20,720
No, I wasn't, Monkey.
125
00:07:20,959 --> 00:07:23,399
I would never drink to excess.
That is Rachel.
126
00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:25,120
She's the only freak
in our family. I...
127
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,999
Or Helen.
Granny can also be a bit odd.
128
00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,278
And well, Anna has just
lost her fiance,
129
00:07:30,279 --> 00:07:33,080
so she is a bit of a looper
right now, but I'm totally fine.
130
00:07:36,639 --> 00:07:39,479
Now, Kate,
can you see that chart over here?
131
00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:40,679
Yeah.
132
00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:43,119
Can you read for me the
letters from the biggest
133
00:07:43,120 --> 00:07:45,720
here to the smallest?
Okay.
134
00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:53,519
L-p-e-d-p-e-f-o-d?
135
00:07:58,120 --> 00:07:59,119
E.
136
00:07:59,120 --> 00:08:00,318
E.
137
00:08:00,319 --> 00:08:02,119
It's better if you don't coach
her. Sorry, sorry.
138
00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:04,238
Sorry, I can't read that.
That's okay.
139
00:08:04,239 --> 00:08:05,279
Well done.
140
00:08:06,160 --> 00:08:10,639
Now, I want you to have a listen
and to raise your finger
141
00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:11,879
when you hear a sound.
142
00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:26,318
Wait, what the fuck
am I supposed to do?
143
00:08:26,319 --> 00:08:29,720
Aiden is dead, and I'm just
supposed to sit with it.
144
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,680
Well, maybe you can ask for help.
145
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:35,480
Does no one listen to me ever?
I am asking for help.
146
00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:38,239
Well, you just got
to ask someone else, so.
147
00:08:38,558 --> 00:08:39,558
Who?
148
00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:42,720
Do not say a higher power, please.
149
00:08:45,519 --> 00:08:46,760
Oh, come on, guys.
150
00:08:47,879 --> 00:08:50,359
You don't believe
in capital G God, do you?
151
00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:51,440
Mm. I do.
152
00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:54,680
Well, no disrespect, but I'm
just really science-focused.
153
00:08:56,879 --> 00:08:58,360
Maybe I'm too smart for rehab.
154
00:08:58,599 --> 00:08:59,879
That's your problem.
155
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:01,120
Intelligence.
156
00:09:07,959 --> 00:09:09,598
Okay, so a bit of concern.
157
00:09:09,599 --> 00:09:11,519
Have you not noticed
anything yourself?
158
00:09:12,599 --> 00:09:14,440
You know, I don't see
any fathers out there.
159
00:09:15,199 --> 00:09:17,238
No one is asking them what their
child's shoe size is or what
160
00:09:17,239 --> 00:09:18,879
they may or may not have noticed.
161
00:09:19,519 --> 00:09:20,760
Kate's short-sighted.
162
00:09:20,959 --> 00:09:22,239
She needs glasses.
163
00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:24,120
I'm going to refer her
to the optometrist.
164
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:25,800
That's all.
165
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,000
Right, sorry.
166
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,918
I don't know what
came over me there.
167
00:09:28,919 --> 00:09:30,680
It's okay.
I've seen worse.
168
00:09:31,599 --> 00:09:34,480
And you're right, we almost
never see any dads in here.
169
00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:59,480
Anna!
What?
170
00:10:00,599 --> 00:10:01,760
Come inside.
171
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:04,839
What!?
Come. Inside.
172
00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:06,360
One minute.
173
00:10:15,279 --> 00:10:16,279
What is it, mum?
174
00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:18,000
Look who came to see you.
175
00:10:21,599 --> 00:10:22,599
Hey.
176
00:10:22,959 --> 00:10:25,400
Hey, Anna.
Awh.
177
00:10:28,360 --> 00:10:31,479
I don't know what to say,
except I'm so sorry.
178
00:10:31,480 --> 00:10:33,080
No, it's really sound
that you came.
179
00:10:33,919 --> 00:10:37,558
Will you have tea, Luke?
Please say yes for me.
180
00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:39,759
She won't stop until you say yes.
I would love some tea.
181
00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:40,799
Thanks, Mary.
182
00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:41,959
Okay.
183
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:48,800
Mum, stop being a lurch.
Just make the tea.
184
00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:50,120
On its way.
185
00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:54,080
Sorry, she's literally
obsessed with you.
186
00:10:54,559 --> 00:10:58,198
Rach used to say that she was
jealous of her because of me.
187
00:10:58,199 --> 00:10:59,680
Don't ask me why.
No.
188
00:11:03,040 --> 00:11:04,040
So?
189
00:11:04,680 --> 00:11:05,959
A bit of cleaning?
190
00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:08,599
I have to earn my keep
from mammy Walsh, you know?
191
00:11:09,559 --> 00:11:11,799
Nah, just anything that stops me
having to look at people
192
00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:13,800
pitying me.
It's the cow eyes.
193
00:11:14,239 --> 00:11:17,400
Mmm. Do you want me to put
on my sunglasses?
194
00:11:17,680 --> 00:11:19,199
Would you mind?
195
00:11:23,120 --> 00:11:24,959
When's the funeral?
Next week.
196
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:26,720
In America.
197
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:29,160
Okay.
When do you leave?
198
00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:31,360
I don't.
199
00:11:31,559 --> 00:11:33,080
Collapsed lung.
200
00:11:33,839 --> 00:11:36,400
So what will you do?
No idea.
201
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,720
I'm probably asking all
the wrong questions.
202
00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:43,800
Have you heard from Rachel?
203
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:45,439
Because she left me a message
204
00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:47,720
asking me to bring her
some Valium.
205
00:11:48,559 --> 00:11:49,919
To rehab?
Mm-hmm.
206
00:11:51,279 --> 00:11:52,519
You're joking.
207
00:11:54,279 --> 00:11:57,679
Luke, I am so sorry that I didn't
believe you when you told
208
00:11:57,680 --> 00:11:58,759
me that she had a problem.
209
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:00,878
I think I just
I didn't want to see it.
210
00:12:00,879 --> 00:12:03,479
And then now that I can see it,
it was obviously there in front
211
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:06,120
of me the whole time,
like the state of her room.
212
00:12:08,639 --> 00:12:09,839
You don't have to apologise.
213
00:12:10,680 --> 00:12:11,680
I get it.
214
00:12:14,239 --> 00:12:17,839
The rehab centre have asked
me if I'm happy to attend
215
00:12:18,519 --> 00:12:20,959
as a involved significant other.
216
00:12:22,559 --> 00:12:23,559
And are you?
217
00:12:24,639 --> 00:12:25,919
I don't know.
218
00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:27,959
Not really sure
I want to talk to her.
219
00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,319
You're lucky you can talk to her.
220
00:12:32,680 --> 00:12:34,198
I'm sorry, Anna.
221
00:12:34,199 --> 00:12:36,359
I'm not thinking.
No, no, no, no, no.
222
00:12:36,360 --> 00:12:38,040
You're grand.
It's me that's the problem.
223
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,440
I just want to talk
to him so badly.
224
00:12:42,279 --> 00:12:43,999
Just to make sense of everything.
225
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:49,278
And obviously, I can't, and I
never will be able to ever again.
226
00:12:49,279 --> 00:12:52,279
I just don't know how I'm
supposed to live with that.
227
00:12:53,639 --> 00:12:54,760
Thanks, Mary.
228
00:12:57,680 --> 00:12:58,720
She's doing very well.
229
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,599
A bit of physical
work seems to help.
230
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:06,318
It's a struggle to get her out
of bed sometimes,
231
00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:08,919
but maybe a little bit of
makeup would help.
232
00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:12,399
But she'll get there ...Yeah...
in her own time.
233
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:14,680
Yeah.
234
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:25,800
Hey.
235
00:13:26,879 --> 00:13:29,399
Are you okay?
You didn't have any breakfast.
236
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:30,760
I'm not hungry.
237
00:13:31,319 --> 00:13:33,919
I just can't eat when there's
a problem, not till it's fixed.
238
00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:36,120
That explains a lot.
239
00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:38,479
Is that Crucifix yours?
Or did it come with the room?
240
00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:40,399
Oh, no, it's mine.
You want a loan?
241
00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:47,439
You know, if you're going to be
disrespectful, I'll just leave.
242
00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:48,958
No, no, no, no, no, sorry.
Don't leave.
243
00:13:48,959 --> 00:13:50,000
I...
244
00:13:50,559 --> 00:13:52,160
I'm just not the God type.
245
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:54,198
What, you think
that makes you special?
246
00:13:54,199 --> 00:13:55,919
Huh?
Like, gives you an edge?
247
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:57,599
It's not about God.
248
00:13:57,919 --> 00:14:00,559
It's about finding something
more powerful than you.
249
00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:01,800
Anything.
250
00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:04,440
How?
How does that help?
251
00:14:04,639 --> 00:14:06,120
Someone else to blame, really.
252
00:14:06,319 --> 00:14:07,440
That's right up your alley.
253
00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:11,039
If there's something else running
this show, it gives this lovely
254
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:12,599
feeling of powerlessness.
255
00:14:13,680 --> 00:14:15,760
Oh, I hate feeling powerless.
256
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,480
No, you just hate
not getting your way.
257
00:14:19,599 --> 00:14:21,479
Is a bitchiness really
necessary, Jackie?
258
00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:22,679
I'm not being bitchy.
259
00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:24,278
If I was being bitchy, I would
tell you that you've really
260
00:14:24,279 --> 00:14:26,198
let yourself go since
you've come in here.
261
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:28,720
I mean, that sweater
looks ridiculous on you.
262
00:14:28,959 --> 00:14:31,839
Look, just find something that
makes you happy to say, okay,
263
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:35,279
that's more powerful than me,
and ask it for help.
264
00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:37,599
Oh, and it can't be Chris.
265
00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:38,919
As if.
266
00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:40,480
Or Luke.
267
00:14:40,839 --> 00:14:42,839
No men.
Jesus is a man.
268
00:14:50,959 --> 00:14:53,120
You threw me to the wolves
with Rachel, Jack.
269
00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:54,799
You never have my back.
270
00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:57,599
We could have made such
impact if you just backed me up.
271
00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:01,918
It's not our job to make the
impact, it's their job now.
272
00:15:01,919 --> 00:15:06,000
To... fix her,
help her, whatever.
273
00:15:06,319 --> 00:15:09,119
Yeah, but I make one comment and
you caveat it out of existence.
274
00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:10,839
Then I look like
I'm stirring shit.
275
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:13,279
I didn't want to gang up on her.
276
00:15:15,239 --> 00:15:16,239
Gang up.
277
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,360
It's not ganging up.
It's called being a team.
278
00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:21,400
We're not a team.
279
00:15:21,599 --> 00:15:22,599
We're a family.
280
00:15:24,639 --> 00:15:26,400
It's not us against them.
281
00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:30,999
I don't know why you always
seem to see it that way.
282
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,360
And you never do.
283
00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:34,080
And it's lonely, Jack.
284
00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:37,318
It's hard being the one
pointing out all the mistakes.
285
00:15:37,319 --> 00:15:40,279
I don't know if you don't notice.
Don't care.
286
00:15:40,639 --> 00:15:42,319
Just don't say anything.
287
00:15:42,519 --> 00:15:46,319
I don't think it's necessary to
point out mistakes to adults.
288
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,120
They know when they mess up.
289
00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:50,238
Do they?
290
00:15:50,239 --> 00:15:51,800
Yeah. Didn't you?
291
00:15:52,199 --> 00:15:53,439
So what?
292
00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:55,359
We let them mess everything
up and then
293
00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:56,440
figure it out themselves?
294
00:15:56,919 --> 00:15:58,199
I mean, kinda!
295
00:16:06,319 --> 00:16:09,480
Their failings are
not our failures.
296
00:16:18,239 --> 00:16:20,160
You've always done your best.
297
00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:26,279
Haven't you?
298
00:16:40,319 --> 00:16:42,918
Oh Mum, teacher sent
a note in my school bag,
299
00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,479
that my shoes are too small.
300
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:46,319
Okay.
301
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,518
Monkey this note was sent on
Monday. Why didn't you tell me?
302
00:17:06,519 --> 00:17:07,559
I forgot.
303
00:17:07,839 --> 00:17:09,519
Why didn't you tell me
you had a sore foot?
304
00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:13,160
It's just because we don't
wear shoes in the house.
305
00:17:13,598 --> 00:17:15,518
And it says you forget
items for activities.
306
00:17:15,519 --> 00:17:16,839
Like what?
Why didn't you tell me?
307
00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:19,720
I don't know, Mum.
I'm six.
308
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,278
Kate, do you need
a costume for tomorrow?
309
00:17:27,279 --> 00:17:29,279
Yeah, I want to go as
a very hungry caterpillar.
310
00:17:34,239 --> 00:17:36,720
Well, Mummy will work
that out for you in the morning.
311
00:18:29,959 --> 00:18:32,720
I fucking love you, Rachel Walsh.
312
00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:55,279
Oh...
313
00:18:55,959 --> 00:18:57,360
Wha- what are you doing?
314
00:18:57,760 --> 00:18:58,760
Eh, nothing.
315
00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:00,480
Nothing.
316
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,598
I had an itch.
317
00:19:03,599 --> 00:19:08,160
It's best not to scratch the
itch, especially in company.
318
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:09,440
Sorry.
319
00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:13,958
Why are you awake anyway?
320
00:19:13,959 --> 00:19:15,639
I was thinking about Luke.
321
00:19:15,959 --> 00:19:15,999
Coercive Luke?
322
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:19,239
He's not really like that.
323
00:19:19,919 --> 00:19:21,239
I'm quoting you.
324
00:19:21,400 --> 00:19:23,319
Well, I may have over
played that side of him.
325
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,800
He's actually a really nice man.
326
00:19:30,519 --> 00:19:32,879
He might be the nicest man
I've ever gone out with.
327
00:19:33,519 --> 00:19:34,639
Ever met, even.
328
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:36,360
It's quite the claim.
329
00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:39,040
He's...
330
00:19:40,879 --> 00:19:42,239
He's sexy, you know?
331
00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:44,480
Kind.
332
00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:48,918
I never actually thought about it
before now, but...
333
00:19:48,919 --> 00:19:50,440
never felt so safe.
334
00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:54,238
Mum never believed in being
kind when you were sick.
335
00:19:54,239 --> 00:19:56,080
She thinks it causes
malingering.
336
00:19:57,239 --> 00:19:58,599
But Luke.
337
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:01,919
He cared about me.
338
00:20:06,279 --> 00:20:07,800
Is he the forgiving type of guy?
339
00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:10,400
Yeah.
340
00:20:13,919 --> 00:20:17,279
There is this one time-
I don't need the long story.
341
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:19,559
Just yes or no.
342
00:20:20,279 --> 00:20:22,238
Yeah. Yeah.
343
00:20:22,239 --> 00:20:27,239
Well, maybe you can win him back
at your ISO this week.
344
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:31,680
Tell him how much you love him
and how sorry you are.
345
00:20:33,239 --> 00:20:34,720
Do you think that will work?
346
00:20:35,519 --> 00:20:36,599
I should say so.
347
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:42,440
I mean, most guys can't
resist a tearful apology,
348
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:44,599
especially face-to-face.
349
00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:50,760
I wish I could worry
as little as you do.
350
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,040
Please.
351
00:20:52,360 --> 00:20:54,319
I'm obsessively worrisome.
352
00:20:54,919 --> 00:20:55,919
Really?
353
00:20:56,279 --> 00:20:57,638
You'd never be able to tell.
354
00:20:57,639 --> 00:21:01,558
That's because I spent about
six figures on dealing with
355
00:21:01,559 --> 00:21:03,360
my emotional incontinence.
356
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:07,559
Y'know, sometimes I feel.
357
00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:11,199
Sometimes
I just can't stop crying.
358
00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:16,359
But I just told you all that
stuff by Luke and my fear
359
00:21:16,360 --> 00:21:17,400
that I've ruined it.
360
00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:20,160
You just brush it
off with such grace.
361
00:21:20,319 --> 00:21:21,360
Oh, darling.
362
00:21:21,959 --> 00:21:26,400
That's because I really don't
give a damn about you or Luke.
363
00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:41,760
Okay.
364
00:21:41,919 --> 00:21:44,599
I'll be five minutes. Okay.
You warm? Yep. Grand.
365
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:58,440
Five minutes.
366
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:11,239
Thanks so much.
367
00:22:18,639 --> 00:22:21,519
Okay, let's go,
let's go, let's go.
368
00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:26,760
Super girl, yes, yes, yes!
369
00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:31,080
And look, Mummy got you a
lovely new pair of shoes.
370
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:35,198
Are you excited?
Yeah. Yeah.
371
00:22:35,199 --> 00:22:37,120
Are you excited for a book day?
Yeah.
372
00:22:37,279 --> 00:22:38,599
Put your arms up.
373
00:22:38,839 --> 00:22:42,198
Now, you are Mr. Bump.
Who?
374
00:22:42,199 --> 00:22:44,518
Mr. Bump.
It's a Mr. Man book.
375
00:22:44,519 --> 00:22:46,040
You love it?
I don't know that book.
376
00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:49,319
Okay, well, let's pretend
that you do, okay?
377
00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:50,838
So it's your favourite.
378
00:22:50,839 --> 00:22:52,679
It's about a man
who bumps into everything.
379
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:53,719
But I'm a girl.
380
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:55,359
Yeah, you are.
Of course.
381
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:56,800
Of course, you are.
Okay.
382
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:58,480
Well now.
383
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:01,120
Off we go.
384
00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:17,598
What is going on?
385
00:23:17,599 --> 00:23:20,040
Where are you off to this early?
It's not that early.
386
00:23:22,839 --> 00:23:25,199
It's 9: 00 AM.
Has there been a fire?
387
00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:26,400
No.
388
00:23:26,639 --> 00:23:28,120
Aren't you meant to be in college?
389
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:29,480
What college?
390
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:33,079
College, Helen,
where you go to and study.
391
00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:34,400
Oh, yeah, that college.
392
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:36,879
Yeah, no college today.
393
00:23:37,839 --> 00:23:39,440
Lie in.
394
00:23:51,120 --> 00:23:53,360
Where are you off to?
395
00:23:56,959 --> 00:23:59,239
Yeah.
A goodbye would have been nice.
396
00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:06,239
Hello?
397
00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:09,440
Hello?
398
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:21,239
Hmm.
399
00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:25,000
Hi. Do you not have
anything sweet?
400
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:27,799
Chocolate, biscuit, a cake?
No, I need to do a shop.
401
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:29,760
How do you survive
a day without sugar?
402
00:24:29,959 --> 00:24:32,120
Maggie, love yourself.
Yolo, you know?
403
00:24:32,639 --> 00:24:34,879
Get out of there.
I'll make the tea.
404
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:37,160
What's this for?
405
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:40,080
Oh, it's just a work thing.
Right.
406
00:24:41,839 --> 00:24:46,040
Look at all these packages.
Anything for me?
407
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:49,838
I was feeling a bit stressed,
so I went shopping, but I'm
408
00:24:49,839 --> 00:24:51,878
going to be returning them all.
Be careful.
409
00:24:51,879 --> 00:24:53,400
Shopping bulimia again, is it?
410
00:24:54,360 --> 00:24:56,518
Why are you in my house
on a Friday morning?
411
00:24:56,519 --> 00:24:58,278
Kate needed glasses,
and I know I'll never hear
412
00:24:58,279 --> 00:24:59,720
the end of it from James.
413
00:25:00,360 --> 00:25:02,079
As if I don't feel bad enough
that she's been squinting
414
00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:04,800
for five years and
I didn't even notice. Six.
415
00:25:05,239 --> 00:25:07,680
You know, not all of us find
everything easy like you do.
416
00:25:08,879 --> 00:25:10,720
I don't find everything easy.
417
00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:12,959
I feel like a shit mum.
418
00:25:13,639 --> 00:25:15,558
James makes it worse, and...
419
00:25:15,559 --> 00:25:17,079
I don't think you realise
how hard
420
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:18,799
it is to stay in contact
with your ex
421
00:25:18,800 --> 00:25:20,000
just because you have a child.
422
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:22,680
No, I don't realise that.
423
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:24,440
How would I realise that?
424
00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:27,480
Sorry, that we don't all have
the perfect happy marriage.
425
00:25:27,919 --> 00:25:31,558
Claire, you're so
dismissive of my problems.
426
00:25:31,559 --> 00:25:34,080
I've just told you that I'm
shopping because I'm stressed,
427
00:25:34,199 --> 00:25:36,079
and you haven't asked me
what I'm stressed about.
428
00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:38,080
That is the first thing
I would have asked you.
429
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:40,080
I'm sorry.
430
00:25:40,480 --> 00:25:41,760
I'm sorry.
431
00:25:43,239 --> 00:25:44,519
Why are you stressed?
432
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,159
Well, I don't want to tell you
now because you're only asking
433
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,318
me because I told you to.
Maggie, don't do that.
434
00:25:49,319 --> 00:25:51,239
Just answer the question.
435
00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:55,439
Garve and I are trying
to get pregnant.
436
00:25:55,440 --> 00:25:56,719
That's what the chart is for.
437
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:59,639
Oh, Maggie, how long
have you been trying?
438
00:25:59,959 --> 00:26:01,279
Since our wedding.
439
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:06,919
That's a while.
Yeah.
440
00:26:08,279 --> 00:26:09,599
Well, have you tried...
441
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:12,238
Having sex somewhere between
Twickenham and Richmond
442
00:26:12,239 --> 00:26:13,279
during the Six Nations?
443
00:26:14,160 --> 00:26:17,120
Cause that worked for me?
No, I haven't tried that.
444
00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:19,720
But I've tried everything else.
445
00:26:19,839 --> 00:26:22,879
Well, Paul is actually
really against IVF.
446
00:26:23,279 --> 00:26:24,800
Why?
I don't know.
447
00:26:25,959 --> 00:26:27,480
What's his plan B then?
448
00:26:27,879 --> 00:26:30,559
Are you sure he wants a baby?
He says he does.
449
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:33,199
Naomi Campbell had
her first child at 49.
450
00:26:35,319 --> 00:26:39,720
It'll happen.
Thanks.
451
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:51,879
Are you lost?
452
00:27:53,279 --> 00:27:54,760
Yeah.
453
00:27:54,959 --> 00:27:56,519
Can I help you?
454
00:28:12,959 --> 00:28:14,400
It's okay if I sit?
455
00:28:25,199 --> 00:28:26,879
It's cold.
456
00:28:27,839 --> 00:28:29,199
Yeah, I didn't bring a jacket.
457
00:28:30,919 --> 00:28:34,839
Just had an impulse to leave,
so I left.
458
00:28:35,279 --> 00:28:36,800
I used to do that a lot.
459
00:28:39,279 --> 00:28:43,239
I'd end up somewhere
and have no idea how I got there.
460
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:46,599
Griefs weird like that.
461
00:28:52,559 --> 00:28:54,879
How long?
462
00:28:57,279 --> 00:29:00,080
Four weeks.
Ouf.
463
00:29:01,599 --> 00:29:02,599
Trenches.
464
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:07,120
You?
465
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:09,559
Two years, three months.
466
00:29:15,239 --> 00:29:17,000
You keep it...
467
00:29:17,879 --> 00:29:19,480
really beautiful.
468
00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:22,080
Thank you.
469
00:29:23,599 --> 00:29:25,120
I mean, I come here every day.
470
00:29:25,559 --> 00:29:28,000
I live just over there,
so I'm lucky.
471
00:29:29,120 --> 00:29:30,120
Lucky?
472
00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:32,760
It's just a weird choice of word.
473
00:29:34,519 --> 00:29:36,000
True.
474
00:29:38,559 --> 00:29:39,559
Anyway.
475
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:44,599
What has my husband enjoying
the pleasure of your attendance?
476
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:49,199
My fiancé, Aidan.
He's American.
477
00:29:49,519 --> 00:29:50,519
He, um...
478
00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:53,239
You know.
479
00:29:53,959 --> 00:29:55,959
He was American.
I prefer is.
480
00:29:57,319 --> 00:30:00,838
His parents,
they brought him back to bury him
481
00:30:00,839 --> 00:30:02,279
over there, and I've just been...
482
00:30:03,959 --> 00:30:06,199
Looking for something.
Anything.
483
00:30:06,680 --> 00:30:10,838
So I've been looking for
a grave with Aidan on it,
484
00:30:10,839 --> 00:30:15,040
and this is
the closest that I found.
485
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:20,638
You know what?
You're welcome here anytime.
486
00:30:20,639 --> 00:30:21,680
Anytime.
487
00:30:24,519 --> 00:30:26,000
I'm Mitch.
488
00:30:26,199 --> 00:30:27,559
Anna.
489
00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:29,040
Nice to meet you.
490
00:30:32,279 --> 00:30:36,199
I actually haven't
properly cried yet.
491
00:30:36,959 --> 00:30:37,959
Yeah?
Was that...
492
00:30:38,519 --> 00:30:40,559
Does that worry you?
Yeah, I'm a cryer.
493
00:30:41,879 --> 00:30:43,760
So it must mean
something that I'm not.
494
00:30:44,519 --> 00:30:45,519
Must it?
495
00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:48,879
I didn't cry for
months when he died.
496
00:30:51,599 --> 00:30:53,199
And then our dog died.
497
00:30:55,040 --> 00:30:56,480
And I couldn't stop crying.
498
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:01,480
Yeah, maybe.
499
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:04,319
Maybe just hadn't hit me fully.
500
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:06,000
Yeah, maybe.
501
00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:09,559
Yeah, but then sometimes
I feel like I can't breathe.
502
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:13,239
Those waves pass.
503
00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:15,760
Promise.
504
00:31:17,599 --> 00:31:20,159
And then, of course,
some other bullshit comes
505
00:31:20,160 --> 00:31:21,318
along and overwhelms you.
506
00:31:21,319 --> 00:31:22,879
Never fucking ends, really.
507
00:31:26,599 --> 00:31:28,480
I'll leave you to it.
508
00:31:50,680 --> 00:31:54,839
Woah.
509
00:31:55,599 --> 00:31:57,919
Cool.
510
00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:03,119
Will I make you feel smug
511
00:32:03,120 --> 00:32:04,279
and give you a
laugh at the same time?
512
00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:05,958
Yeah.
Great.
513
00:32:05,959 --> 00:32:08,400
Just be thankful you don't
have to deal with this.
514
00:32:10,319 --> 00:32:13,159
Are these people
that you've matched with?
515
00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:15,318
No, God, no.
They're just people that like me.
516
00:32:15,319 --> 00:32:18,120
Oh, I feel sorry for Marcus.
Feel sorry for me.
517
00:32:20,839 --> 00:32:22,360
Mm-hmm.
518
00:32:23,639 --> 00:32:26,119
Oh, my God. That's Dr. Sheen.
That's... Connor.
519
00:32:26,120 --> 00:32:27,598
I knew he was single.
520
00:32:27,599 --> 00:32:29,119
How did you know he was single?
There was a vibe.
521
00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:31,558
What are you doing?
Will I match with him?
522
00:32:31,559 --> 00:32:33,278
No, I don't think you're allowed.
What?
523
00:32:33,279 --> 00:32:35,959
He's not treating my wounds yet.
Oh, Claire.
524
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:38,160
Ooh! You did?
We matched!
525
00:32:38,319 --> 00:32:41,199
Oh! I'm going to have
sex with the doctor.
526
00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:42,719
♪ I'm going to have
sex with the doctor.
527
00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:45,319
Claire, Mum would be so happy
if you married a doctor.
528
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:47,838
Oh, look at his hands.
529
00:32:47,839 --> 00:32:50,039
They're pretty good hands.
Such good hands.
530
00:32:50,040 --> 00:32:52,519
He's handsome.
He's ridey.
531
00:32:58,800 --> 00:33:01,199
Am I never allowed
to be alone in this place?
532
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:06,000
An addict alone
is in bad company.
533
00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:08,040
Oh, for fuck's sake, Neil.
534
00:33:08,919 --> 00:33:11,000
Not everything has to be
turned into a slogan.
535
00:33:11,639 --> 00:33:12,959
It does in here.
536
00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:19,958
Um...
537
00:33:19,959 --> 00:33:22,639
I'm sorry for what
I said about you in my ISO.
538
00:33:23,040 --> 00:33:24,159
You're angry, you lashed out.
539
00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:26,040
If anyone's going
to understand that, it's me.
540
00:33:30,519 --> 00:33:32,000
Anna hung up on me.
541
00:33:34,839 --> 00:33:39,480
She hates me.
Everybody hates me.
542
00:33:39,760 --> 00:33:42,000
I don't hate you, Rachel.
543
00:33:44,199 --> 00:33:46,480
I don't care if you hate me.
544
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:09,359
Have you been in bed all day?
Yeah.
545
00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:10,400
Problem?
546
00:34:10,639 --> 00:34:11,879
No. Just...
547
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:19,159
Are you okay?
Jesus.
548
00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:21,800
Must be bad if you're
asking me that.
549
00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:26,480
Yeah, just... Some days
I need to be horizontal.
550
00:34:27,239 --> 00:34:28,239
I get it.
551
00:34:30,839 --> 00:34:32,000
Where have you been?
552
00:34:32,199 --> 00:34:33,199
St. Mary's.
553
00:34:33,319 --> 00:34:35,719
To Mass?
Not inside, just the graveyard.
554
00:34:36,639 --> 00:34:37,639
Why?
555
00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:41,639
To feel something. No,
I don't know. Just to...
556
00:34:43,279 --> 00:34:45,159
Figure it all out.
557
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:47,279
Figure what out?
558
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:52,439
Aidan has this ex called Janie-
had this ex called Janie.
559
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:54,199
And when I got
home from the hospital,
560
00:34:54,918 --> 00:34:56,439
she rang his phone
561
00:34:56,440 --> 00:34:58,439
and she left him a message
saying how devastated she
562
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:02,000
was and that they'd only
seen each other last week.
563
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:04,120
Jesus.
564
00:35:07,519 --> 00:35:09,119
Why didn't he say anything?
565
00:35:09,120 --> 00:35:11,598
I felt really stupid.
566
00:35:11,599 --> 00:35:13,400
Aidan never mentioned
that he saw her.
567
00:35:15,559 --> 00:35:18,278
Look, one phone call
doesn't mean anything.
568
00:35:18,279 --> 00:35:20,399
Yeah, but then, of course,
I checked her social media and
569
00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:22,000
loads of photos of them together.
570
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:24,400
Because they were a couple.
571
00:35:24,839 --> 00:35:27,559
Okay, so that night, when we were
on our ride to Rachel,
572
00:35:27,720 --> 00:35:29,198
he told me he needed
to tell me something.
573
00:35:29,199 --> 00:35:31,959
What if he wanted to tell me
that he was having an affair?
574
00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:33,999
No, no way.
575
00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:36,679
Okay, not having an affair,
but what if he had an affair
576
00:35:36,680 --> 00:35:38,040
while we were together?
577
00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:41,079
No, look, he just
asked you to marry him.
578
00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:43,799
He'd hardly be having an affair.
Okay, so not an actual affair.
579
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:49,279
But what if he realised he loved
us both equally or something?
580
00:35:49,919 --> 00:35:51,160
Highly unlikely.
581
00:35:52,000 --> 00:35:54,000
And why didn't he tell me
that he saw her?
582
00:35:57,120 --> 00:35:58,319
See, I don't know.
583
00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:01,279
Maybe Rachel was right.
Maybe he was a bit...
584
00:36:02,199 --> 00:36:04,480
Jesus, you're taking
relationship advice from Rachel.
585
00:36:04,639 --> 00:36:07,559
That's mental.
I feel mental.
586
00:36:10,279 --> 00:36:12,278
What are you two doing
hiding away in here?
587
00:36:12,279 --> 00:36:13,400
Eh, we live here.
588
00:36:13,559 --> 00:36:14,760
What are you doing here?
589
00:36:14,879 --> 00:36:16,519
Let me guess, dropping Kate off.
590
00:36:17,120 --> 00:36:19,439
I think I'm going to have
a very hot date very soon,
591
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:21,439
and everything in
my wardrobe is boring,
592
00:36:21,440 --> 00:36:23,440
so I wanted something fresh.
593
00:36:23,919 --> 00:36:24,918
Who's the hot date?
594
00:36:24,919 --> 00:36:26,680
A guy from the apps.
595
00:36:30,519 --> 00:36:31,878
Don't let me stop
your conversation.
596
00:36:31,879 --> 00:36:33,518
What were you talking
about, anyway?
597
00:36:33,519 --> 00:36:35,760
Anna's been wondering
around a grave yard.
598
00:36:36,839 --> 00:36:38,239
Weird.
Are you okay?
599
00:36:39,199 --> 00:36:40,559
Yeah, I'm great.
600
00:36:43,120 --> 00:36:45,680
Guys, I still can't bring myself
to cancel the wedding venue.
601
00:36:45,919 --> 00:36:47,239
Well, don't cancel it.
602
00:36:47,599 --> 00:36:48,800
What, leave it empty for a day?
603
00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:52,079
That's a waste of money.
Okay, Garve. No.
604
00:36:52,080 --> 00:36:53,440
Why don't you have a memorial?
605
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:56,039
It might give you the closure
that you need,
606
00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:57,720
and that's
what rituals are for.
607
00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:01,120
Are you serious?
Yeah.
608
00:37:02,639 --> 00:37:03,959
What do you think?
609
00:37:04,519 --> 00:37:05,720
Might be nice.
610
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:07,439
Yeah, but who would I invite?
611
00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:09,519
The same people as the wedding.
612
00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:14,000
You could make it
a celebration of Aiden.
613
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:15,400
You're Aiden,
how you knew him.
614
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:17,079
Bring back some happy memories.
615
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:18,879
We'd all help you organise it,
wouldn't we?
616
00:37:19,160 --> 00:37:20,160
Mm-hmm.
617
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:24,120
Yeah.
618
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:29,719
Too much?
That's far too much.
619
00:37:29,720 --> 00:37:32,160
Too much. There's plenty of
my stuff in there if you want.
620
00:37:32,279 --> 00:37:35,360
You always laugh
when I suggest that.
621
00:37:35,559 --> 00:37:38,040
I mean, if I wanted to look
like Sylvanian families, maybe.
622
00:37:50,599 --> 00:37:52,639
You ready?
623
00:37:53,599 --> 00:37:55,279
Really?
624
00:37:55,599 --> 00:37:58,558
What do you mean really?
I mean, really going to have sex?
625
00:37:58,559 --> 00:37:59,879
I'm, kinda, not in the mood.
626
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:01,879
I'm not in the mood either,
but...
627
00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:05,318
Come on, we have to stick
to the schedule, and we
628
00:38:05,319 --> 00:38:06,480
have been doing so well.
629
00:38:06,639 --> 00:38:09,039
We've got two days left,
then we can take a break.
630
00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:11,359
Pfft. You make it sound
like couch to 5K.
631
00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:14,318
It is way easier than
couch to 5K.
632
00:38:15,639 --> 00:38:20,879
Look, I know it's not fun
and it's not sexy, but come on,
633
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:22,879
let's just get it done.
634
00:38:24,360 --> 00:38:25,839
I shaved my legs for you.
635
00:38:26,639 --> 00:38:27,959
Both of them.
636
00:38:29,599 --> 00:38:31,559
I hope to God I can
even get it up.
637
00:38:32,040 --> 00:38:33,040
He'll manage.
638
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:34,760
Come on.
639
00:38:35,959 --> 00:38:38,120
I know how you love it.
God.
640
00:38:56,559 --> 00:38:59,519
Do you think Anna blames
me for Aiden dying?
641
00:39:00,720 --> 00:39:02,319
I don't know, Rachel.
642
00:39:03,639 --> 00:39:04,919
Sorry.
643
00:39:06,559 --> 00:39:08,519
I knew she'd come for me.
She always does.
644
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:11,519
Yeah, but you didn't
know they'd crush.
645
00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:15,959
Oh Chris has just been
eating at me.
646
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:18,199
It's like all I can think about.
647
00:39:19,879 --> 00:39:22,639
I just can't manage when
people are annoyed at me.
648
00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:25,799
You have to stop worrying about
what people think
649
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:27,679
about you, Rachel.
You can't control it, y'know.
650
00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:29,080
So what do I do?
651
00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:31,599
Let it pass.
652
00:39:33,360 --> 00:39:34,360
It'll go.
653
00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:36,160
Will be gone.
654
00:39:39,199 --> 00:39:41,439
Like Aidan.
655
00:39:53,599 --> 00:39:54,879
Sorry about Aidan.
656
00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:02,000
I don't think that's going
to wash with Anna.
657
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:53,400
Hello.
658
00:40:53,639 --> 00:40:54,639
Oh, Rachel.
659
00:40:55,279 --> 00:40:56,879
What's it tonight?
660
00:40:57,559 --> 00:40:58,878
Do you need to pop out again,
661
00:40:58,879 --> 00:41:00,559
or is it more painkillers
you're after?
662
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:04,839
No, it's just my family letter.
663
00:41:05,760 --> 00:41:08,000
It's to my sister Anna to say
sorry about her fiancé.
664
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,720
Em, will you post it for me?
665
00:41:13,519 --> 00:41:14,800
It'll go first thing.
666
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:16,360
Okay.
667
00:41:16,519 --> 00:41:17,519
Thanks.
668
00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:18,760
Rachel.
669
00:41:19,720 --> 00:41:21,040
Well done.
670
00:41:47,959 --> 00:41:50,599
He's quite good-looking.
I get it.
671
00:41:57,839 --> 00:41:59,239
Come sit.
672
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:17,919
As you know,
it's Rachel's turn today.
673
00:42:18,599 --> 00:42:21,599
This is Luke,
who's Rachel's boyfriend.
674
00:42:21,839 --> 00:42:22,839
Ex-boyfriend.
675
00:42:23,959 --> 00:42:26,279
Ouch.
676
00:42:27,760 --> 00:42:30,519
I just want to say that
I'm sorry.
677
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:33,319
You know how many times
I've heard you say sorry, Rachel?
678
00:42:34,080 --> 00:42:35,559
But I mean it this time.
679
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:37,959
I'm making amends.
680
00:42:39,319 --> 00:42:41,759
I've got your
questionnaire here, Luke.
681
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:45,799
When we asked if Rachel took
a lot of drugs, you wrote,
682
00:42:45,800 --> 00:42:48,760
I doubt there's a drug
Rachel hasn't taken.
683
00:42:48,959 --> 00:42:50,360
What did you mean by that?
684
00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:55,519
That if there was a drug going,
Rachel would take it.
685
00:42:56,559 --> 00:42:59,440
No matter who gave it to her
or where it'd come from.
686
00:42:59,599 --> 00:43:00,919
Like what?
687
00:43:03,120 --> 00:43:07,918
Speed, ectasy, cocaine...
688
00:43:07,919 --> 00:43:11,160
and heroin.
689
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:15,040
That was one time.
690
00:43:15,559 --> 00:43:17,639
Most normal people
never do heroin, Rachel.
691
00:43:18,959 --> 00:43:21,080
Luke,
when did it become a problem?
692
00:43:24,360 --> 00:43:28,198
It was hard to see you first
because we only ever
693
00:43:28,199 --> 00:43:31,958
met on nights out.
I'm not an angel.
694
00:43:31,959 --> 00:43:35,080
I know how to have fun,
but it's social.
695
00:43:36,239 --> 00:43:39,838
At the time, Rachel used to say
she was too shy to meet me
696
00:43:39,839 --> 00:43:41,559
sober or without drugs.
697
00:43:44,760 --> 00:43:47,878
I don't know. At the time,
I thought it was cute.
698
00:43:47,879 --> 00:43:50,760
Well, I am shy.
It's not a lie.
699
00:43:51,800 --> 00:43:55,278
One morning,
I realised when I kissed her
700
00:43:55,279 --> 00:43:56,599
that she smelled like whiskey.
701
00:43:58,440 --> 00:44:00,199
We hadn't been drinking whiskey.
702
00:44:01,760 --> 00:44:05,160
Before she woke,
I looked around the apartment and
703
00:44:06,040 --> 00:44:08,198
I found an empty bottle that
she had stolen from my
704
00:44:08,199 --> 00:44:09,239
flatmate and finished.
705
00:44:10,480 --> 00:44:14,999
Did you ever try to talk to Rachel
about her drug and alcohol issues?
706
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:16,040
Yeah.
707
00:44:16,199 --> 00:44:19,879
And any time it was brought up,
she would just turn aggressive,
708
00:44:20,760 --> 00:44:24,120
accuse me of being cheap
if I didn't buy for her.
709
00:44:24,639 --> 00:44:28,279
On another occasion,
I left to go to work,
710
00:44:28,599 --> 00:44:32,160
and I realised I had forgotten
my wallet, so I went back in
711
00:44:32,559 --> 00:44:36,040
and found Rachel doing
a line of coke in bed.
712
00:44:37,879 --> 00:44:40,599
Coke that she had stolen
from my flatmate again.
713
00:44:42,040 --> 00:44:43,639
And...
714
00:44:44,879 --> 00:44:46,800
Yeah, I started watching
her from that point.
715
00:44:48,120 --> 00:44:50,080
I knew what I was looking for.
716
00:44:51,959 --> 00:44:53,918
On the coke, she...
717
00:44:53,919 --> 00:44:56,879
she was just loud and rude.
718
00:44:57,199 --> 00:44:59,198
She would turn into this
over-the-top flirt,
719
00:44:59,199 --> 00:45:01,360
just throwing herself at anyone.
720
00:45:02,720 --> 00:45:04,639
It was fucking humiliating.
721
00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:09,039
I believe there was an incident
722
00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:11,279
shortly before Rachel
arrived here.
723
00:45:14,239 --> 00:45:17,199
She had taken a load
of Valium while I was asleep.
724
00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:21,360
I couldn't wake her.
725
00:45:25,919 --> 00:45:27,400
I thought she died.
726
00:45:36,639 --> 00:45:39,480
I thought you were dead, Rachel.
727
00:45:48,639 --> 00:45:51,360
I'm sorry, I can't do this.
728
00:45:52,199 --> 00:45:54,918
What?
No, you can't go.
729
00:45:54,919 --> 00:45:55,959
Not now.
730
00:45:56,480 --> 00:45:59,400
Just stop, please.
731
00:45:59,639 --> 00:46:02,039
Luke! Rachel, please
just leave it, okay?
732
00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:06,639
Listen, if I'm so awful,
why'd you put up with me?
733
00:46:07,879 --> 00:46:10,160
You're not like anyone else
I've ever met, Rach.
734
00:46:11,279 --> 00:46:14,639
On a good day, there's not enough
time in the world to talk to you
735
00:46:15,239 --> 00:46:17,080
about anything, everything.
736
00:46:17,959 --> 00:46:19,360
Please just...
737
00:46:20,599 --> 00:46:22,360
Just say you love me, please.
738
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:27,119
I can't lie to you, Rach.
I don't mind.
739
00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:30,000
Lie to me, please.
I don't mind, please.
740
00:46:30,160 --> 00:46:33,198
Just please,
just say you love me, please.
741
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:22,559
I can't believe it
when I found it.
742
00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:24,838
Not scared, are you?
What?
743
00:47:24,839 --> 00:47:26,918
Well, I can see how
off-putting it might be,
744
00:47:26,919 --> 00:47:28,518
following somebody you've
only met three times
745
00:47:28,519 --> 00:47:30,040
at the back of a cemetery.
746
00:47:30,519 --> 00:47:32,279
You're not afraid
I'm going to kill you?
747
00:47:32,400 --> 00:47:33,959
I don't even know if I'd care.
748
00:47:34,760 --> 00:47:37,720
I was late because a man called
on the phone looking for Aidan.
749
00:47:38,000 --> 00:47:40,480
He'd made an appointment to get
a quote for solar panels.
750
00:47:40,959 --> 00:47:43,000
You know, the hardest part
of the early days
751
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:45,639
was telling people
who didn't know.
752
00:47:45,839 --> 00:47:48,638
You know, phone companies,
bank managers,
753
00:47:48,639 --> 00:47:50,000
even his physiotherapist.
754
00:47:50,160 --> 00:47:51,598
Yeah, but
they don't even talk to me
755
00:47:51,599 --> 00:47:52,918
because I'm not his next of kin.
756
00:47:52,919 --> 00:47:54,680
But sher the letters still
come to my house.
757
00:47:55,120 --> 00:47:57,079
I have a brilliant idea
for a business,
758
00:47:57,080 --> 00:47:59,838
a company that
would manage all of that.
759
00:47:59,839 --> 00:48:01,439
So calls the bank managers,
760
00:48:01,440 --> 00:48:03,080
phones the
mobile phone companies,
761
00:48:03,599 --> 00:48:05,918
rings around, cancels
all future appointments.
762
00:48:05,919 --> 00:48:08,039
Yeah, I'd give that company
everything I own right now.
763
00:48:08,040 --> 00:48:09,400
Do you know what to call it?
764
00:48:09,559 --> 00:48:10,559
Rest assured.
765
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:12,638
Rest assured.
That's perfect.
766
00:48:12,639 --> 00:48:14,399
That's good. That is good.
That is good.
767
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:16,199
They take care of all that crap.
768
00:48:21,879 --> 00:48:23,680
I left 'em some flowers.
769
00:48:23,800 --> 00:48:25,199
I hope that's okay.
770
00:49:04,919 --> 00:49:09,720
{\an8}...my heart.
771
00:49:10,319 --> 00:49:18,879
{\an8}♪ To anyone who comes,
how can I be so bad?
772
00:49:20,599 --> 00:49:24,519
{\an8}♪ With all the love I have.
773
00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:37,639
♪ Jesus, Jesus, do you know
where I've been sleeping?
774
00:49:38,199 --> 00:49:45,800
♪ Of course you do, a man
like you knows all the secrets
775
00:49:46,519 --> 00:49:48,439
♪ I've been keeping.
776
00:49:48,440 --> 00:49:57,679
♪ Jesus, Jesus, do you know
what they've been saying?
777
00:49:57,680 --> 00:50:05,400
♪ Of course you do, a man
like you hears everything,
778
00:50:05,519 --> 00:50:08,080
not just their praying.
779
00:50:08,199 --> 00:50:12,480
RTÉ, 2025.
55842
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