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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,361 --> 00:00:04,921 For the love of Judith Christ, mate. 2 00:00:05,041 --> 00:00:06,921 Do we have to have this conversation again? 3 00:00:07,041 --> 00:00:08,601 Hartford, Styles and Menzies? 4 00:00:08,721 --> 00:00:12,441 That's not a fucking appeal, but that's an inquisition. 5 00:00:12,561 --> 00:00:15,961 A lot of people in your situation can find the loss of an appeal 6 00:00:16,081 --> 00:00:18,161 more devastating than the initial conviction. 7 00:00:18,281 --> 00:00:20,241 Not with my parole hearing coming up. 8 00:00:20,361 --> 00:00:22,761 The Parole Board does love a little bit of repentance. 9 00:00:22,881 --> 00:00:25,361 Good thing I wrote that in the guidelines, eh? 10 00:00:26,481 --> 00:00:27,961 Arrgh! Fuck. Oh... 11 00:00:28,081 --> 00:00:31,561 I want to sing, Cleave. That's what I want to do. 12 00:00:31,681 --> 00:00:33,881 You're thick with the... the Chief, aren't you? 13 00:00:34,001 --> 00:00:35,801 Yes, but maybe not so much now. 14 00:00:35,921 --> 00:00:38,721 Live the dream. Live the dream, my friend. 15 00:00:38,841 --> 00:00:40,241 There may be a way around this. 16 00:00:40,361 --> 00:00:42,921 - What is it? - Bearbung, Cleaver. 17 00:00:44,201 --> 00:00:47,201 - Bearbung. - Talk to me, Kieran. 18 00:01:26,201 --> 00:01:28,761 Good luck with the appeal, Cleaver. 19 00:01:28,881 --> 00:01:31,601 - See you on the outside, fellas. - Give 'em hell, Cleave. 20 00:01:31,721 --> 00:01:33,481 Kick him in the nuts for me, mate. 21 00:01:33,601 --> 00:01:35,081 Thanks, fellas. 22 00:01:43,961 --> 00:01:46,241 I almost miss him. 23 00:01:46,361 --> 00:01:47,721 Always good for a laugh. 24 00:01:47,841 --> 00:01:52,161 No, not even in jest. The man is a coke-addled sexual deviant. 25 00:01:52,281 --> 00:01:56,561 It was you who caught him humping Beck Nissel in the loo, wasn't it? 26 00:01:56,681 --> 00:02:00,281 No, Mandy, the sister. Beck was later, in the lift. 27 00:02:00,401 --> 00:02:01,921 Prison is where the man belongs. 28 00:02:02,041 --> 00:02:04,441 Oh, heavens, we all agree about that. 29 00:02:04,561 --> 00:02:06,681 Oh, God, yes. The only place for him. 30 00:02:06,801 --> 00:02:08,281 Hi. 31 00:02:09,881 --> 00:02:11,921 No grandstanding in there. 32 00:02:12,041 --> 00:02:15,001 Just look humble. Don't be a smart-arse. 33 00:02:15,121 --> 00:02:18,521 I'm... I am St Francis of Assisi. 34 00:02:18,641 --> 00:02:20,721 I am a father unto my flock. 35 00:02:20,841 --> 00:02:22,521 Just ordinary, decent. 36 00:02:22,641 --> 00:02:24,961 I'll channel Harry 'Sorry' David. 37 00:02:25,081 --> 00:02:29,081 You know what? I don't need this. I am frantically busy. 38 00:02:29,201 --> 00:02:31,321 If you want to defend yourself, here are my notes. 39 00:02:31,441 --> 00:02:34,561 Best thing that's going to happen today is maybe we get a retrial. 40 00:02:34,681 --> 00:02:37,241 - There's certainly grounds... - Hey, Red. What's wrong? 41 00:02:37,361 --> 00:02:41,401 OK, I'm sorry. OK. I'm sorry. Please. Come on, please. 42 00:02:41,521 --> 00:02:47,441 I cannot spend any more time in this fucking shithole waiting for a retrial. 43 00:02:47,561 --> 00:02:50,241 Well, what are you expecting today? 44 00:02:52,001 --> 00:02:54,521 My old life. I want it back. 45 00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:56,201 I want everything. 46 00:02:56,321 --> 00:02:58,681 I want the bar, I want the bars. 47 00:02:58,801 --> 00:03:01,321 I want Barney. 48 00:03:01,441 --> 00:03:06,761 I want Sundays with Wendy and Fuzz. I want my fucking life back. 49 00:03:06,881 --> 00:03:10,241 Given the bench, I wouldn't hope for too much. 50 00:03:10,361 --> 00:03:12,641 - Mention Bearbung. - Bearbung? 51 00:03:12,761 --> 00:03:14,601 I'm not citing a case I know nothing about. 52 00:03:14,721 --> 00:03:16,081 Just say it. 53 00:03:21,081 --> 00:03:22,641 All rise. 54 00:03:30,441 --> 00:03:34,201 In all, there were, in Judge Walter's summations, 55 00:03:34,321 --> 00:03:37,201 some eight clear breaches of law in his instruction to the jury. 56 00:03:37,321 --> 00:03:41,201 Bored, Miss Engels. You have made this point three times. 57 00:03:41,321 --> 00:03:44,521 - And each time, it failed to land. - Move on. 58 00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:47,041 On six occasions, there was a failure... 59 00:03:47,161 --> 00:03:51,561 By the appellant's counsel to present anything interesting to this court. 60 00:03:51,681 --> 00:03:54,041 ..to allow admissible evidence. 61 00:03:54,161 --> 00:03:57,041 It's difficult to look at the transcript of this trial 62 00:03:57,161 --> 00:04:01,161 and not query whether there was some sort of set against the appellant. 63 00:04:01,281 --> 00:04:05,361 Miss Engels, if you are imputing any bias by this bench, 64 00:04:05,481 --> 00:04:08,841 you may find yourself joining the appellant. 65 00:04:08,961 --> 00:04:10,481 No, Your Honour. 66 00:04:10,601 --> 00:04:14,401 But the appellant was a prominent Sydney barrister 67 00:04:14,521 --> 00:04:17,241 who has now languished in prison for 11 months 68 00:04:17,361 --> 00:04:19,481 when any single one of these 13 instances 69 00:04:19,601 --> 00:04:21,561 create clear grounds for a mistrial. 70 00:04:21,681 --> 00:04:23,161 Rubbish. 71 00:04:23,281 --> 00:04:25,881 Rubbish, rubbish, rubbish. 72 00:04:26,001 --> 00:04:28,121 Could I add, rubbish? 73 00:04:28,241 --> 00:04:30,001 - Bearbung. - Bearbung. 74 00:04:30,121 --> 00:04:32,601 Bearbung. 75 00:04:32,721 --> 00:04:35,841 Can you instruct your client to stop that? 76 00:04:35,961 --> 00:04:38,961 - Has the man Tourette's or something? - Bearbung. 77 00:04:39,081 --> 00:04:43,041 Excuse me, Your Honour. A slight case thereof. 78 00:04:43,161 --> 00:04:47,361 Under stress, I cough and say the word 'Bearbung.' 79 00:04:47,481 --> 00:04:49,081 I have no...Bearbung. 80 00:04:49,201 --> 00:04:53,441 I have no idea why, just a thing since childhood. 81 00:04:53,561 --> 00:04:55,121 Excuse me.Bearbung. 82 00:04:55,241 --> 00:04:59,361 - I think I've had quite enough. - Quite agree. 83 00:04:59,481 --> 00:05:02,081 Ah, yes. 84 00:05:02,201 --> 00:05:06,841 But before we completely dismiss this, 85 00:05:06,961 --> 00:05:14,081 I think I did see something of merit in one of Miss Engel's points. 86 00:05:26,441 --> 00:05:27,801 Fuck! 87 00:05:27,921 --> 00:05:32,121 - What just happened in there? - Fucking Kieran Webster. 88 00:05:32,241 --> 00:05:34,201 - He must have told Greene. - Told him what? 89 00:05:34,321 --> 00:05:38,041 I believe it has something to do with Eddie's retirement plans. 90 00:05:47,801 --> 00:05:51,961 What the hell happened in there? Who or what is Bearbung? 91 00:05:52,081 --> 00:05:54,921 Well, 'bearbung' is an Aboriginal word 92 00:05:55,041 --> 00:05:58,601 meaning 'an illegally obtained lease between an appellant judge 93 00:05:58,721 --> 00:06:00,681 and a mining company.' It's a beautiful word. 94 00:06:00,801 --> 00:06:03,561 - Are you happy with today's result? - Innocent, boys and girls. 95 00:06:03,681 --> 00:06:05,041 Completely innocent. 96 00:06:05,161 --> 00:06:08,401 Three judges with one voice declared what happened to me 97 00:06:08,521 --> 00:06:11,241 an egregious miscarriage of justice. 98 00:06:11,361 --> 00:06:14,001 One of them seemed very close to tears. 99 00:06:14,121 --> 00:06:16,161 Will you be seeking compensation? 100 00:06:16,281 --> 00:06:18,601 Look, that's all for the future. 101 00:06:18,721 --> 00:06:20,761 I just want to spend some quality time 102 00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:23,361 with my family and loved ones, my friends. 103 00:06:23,481 --> 00:06:25,481 Thank you. That'll be all. 104 00:06:26,641 --> 00:06:29,321 I do have family and friends, don't I? 105 00:06:29,441 --> 00:06:30,881 You and me! 106 00:06:31,001 --> 00:06:34,121 Mates on the inside, then mates on the out! 107 00:06:34,241 --> 00:06:36,001 Who would have thought it? 108 00:06:36,121 --> 00:06:38,121 Yes. How are you, mate? Thanks for coming. 109 00:06:38,241 --> 00:06:42,681 I wouldn't have missed it for nothing. You should go and be with your family. 110 00:06:42,801 --> 00:06:46,441 - Give me a call when you can, hey? - Alright, mate. Thank you for that. 111 00:06:46,561 --> 00:06:48,601 How are you, are you alright? 112 00:06:48,721 --> 00:06:50,801 Yeah, I'm good. It's just... 113 00:06:50,921 --> 00:06:53,081 No, I'm good. I love you, mate. 114 00:06:53,201 --> 00:06:54,761 Great, great. 115 00:06:54,881 --> 00:06:57,241 - I love you, mate. - Thanks for coming, Mal. 116 00:06:57,361 --> 00:06:59,401 Look after yourself, yeah? 117 00:07:00,481 --> 00:07:01,961 Oi! 118 00:07:03,641 --> 00:07:07,801 Isn't there some sort of celebratory something? 119 00:07:07,921 --> 00:07:09,401 Where's Barnyard? 120 00:07:11,441 --> 00:07:14,921 Quite a bit has happened since you went inside. 121 00:07:15,041 --> 00:07:16,521 Oh, yeah? 122 00:07:25,841 --> 00:07:27,321 Barney... 123 00:07:29,201 --> 00:07:30,681 Barney has cancer. 124 00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:35,161 What do you mean? 125 00:07:35,281 --> 00:07:36,801 What sort of cancer? 126 00:07:38,441 --> 00:07:40,161 Bad cancer? 127 00:07:40,281 --> 00:07:42,001 Fuck. 128 00:07:42,121 --> 00:07:44,121 Red... 129 00:07:44,241 --> 00:07:45,601 Red? 130 00:07:45,721 --> 00:07:48,601 Fuck! Why didn't somebody tell me? 131 00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:52,081 He must be a mess. 132 00:07:53,481 --> 00:07:56,561 Looking marvellous, everybody. 133 00:08:01,001 --> 00:08:02,841 And turn. 134 00:08:02,961 --> 00:08:05,761 Fantastic, Barney. One more. 135 00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:10,001 Barnyard. 136 00:08:11,161 --> 00:08:12,521 Hey. 137 00:08:12,641 --> 00:08:15,841 You've put on some weight. Prison must suit you, mate. 138 00:08:15,961 --> 00:08:18,441 Forget about me. You! 139 00:08:18,561 --> 00:08:21,721 Scarlet told me - cancer. 140 00:08:21,841 --> 00:08:24,601 - Fuck, mate! - Yeah, of the cods. 141 00:08:24,721 --> 00:08:26,761 - Barney! - One of them, anyway. 142 00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:29,561 - I don't know what to say. - You know what, mate? 143 00:08:29,681 --> 00:08:31,961 It's the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. 144 00:08:32,081 --> 00:08:36,001 Every day is a blessing. I breathe in life, exhale joy. 145 00:08:36,121 --> 00:08:38,161 I can't get enough of my kids. 146 00:08:38,281 --> 00:08:42,081 Jilly, tell me you've got one of those fantastic cream doughnuts. 147 00:08:42,201 --> 00:08:44,001 I saved one especially for you. 148 00:08:44,121 --> 00:08:46,041 - You have to try one of these. - Right. 149 00:08:46,161 --> 00:08:47,761 So what did the doctors say? 150 00:08:47,881 --> 00:08:51,961 Ah, 50/50. I've got some secondaries in the old lymphs. 151 00:08:52,081 --> 00:08:55,841 Actually, I'm already a 50. They've taken one off. 152 00:08:55,961 --> 00:08:57,441 OK, now, slowly. 153 00:08:57,561 --> 00:09:01,081 Feel the way the cream oozes into the mouth. 154 00:09:01,201 --> 00:09:03,081 Don't rush it. 155 00:09:03,201 --> 00:09:04,721 Savour! 156 00:09:05,881 --> 00:09:07,961 Hm? 157 00:09:10,081 --> 00:09:13,841 - What's that? - That's it - my cancerous testicle. 158 00:09:13,961 --> 00:09:16,841 - Oh, Barn! - Hard to believe all life starts here. 159 00:09:16,961 --> 00:09:19,121 - Oh, mate! - Children come from this. 160 00:09:19,241 --> 00:09:21,761 They don't come from a bloody key ring. 161 00:09:21,881 --> 00:09:24,201 It's just an organ! We eat stuff like this. 162 00:09:24,321 --> 00:09:27,041 Nobody wants to look at a ball in aspic. 163 00:09:27,161 --> 00:09:29,681 I've been in prison for 11 months without a woman. 164 00:09:29,801 --> 00:09:32,201 In a single moment, you've put me off sex for another 11. 165 00:09:32,321 --> 00:09:33,681 - Come on. - Jesus. 166 00:09:33,801 --> 00:09:37,681 So, come on - what stage of the treatment are you at? 167 00:09:37,801 --> 00:09:39,681 One more hit of chemo to go. 168 00:09:39,801 --> 00:09:43,001 I'm thinking I may not go back to work, mate, ever. 169 00:09:43,121 --> 00:09:45,281 Ever? 170 00:09:45,401 --> 00:09:49,081 Well, sure. You know, whatever you think. 171 00:09:49,201 --> 00:09:55,321 You more than anyone I know need mental stimulation, don't you? 172 00:09:55,441 --> 00:09:59,881 It would be a shame if you pulled yourself through all of this 173 00:10:00,001 --> 00:10:02,001 and then there was nothing there. 174 00:10:02,121 --> 00:10:03,761 Terrible. 175 00:10:03,881 --> 00:10:06,081 But take your time. 176 00:10:06,201 --> 00:10:09,361 Whatever you need. I'm fine. I'll be alright. 177 00:10:09,481 --> 00:10:11,521 So don't worry about that. 178 00:10:11,641 --> 00:10:15,321 I'm, you know, I'm right back in the game. 179 00:10:15,441 --> 00:10:18,201 - You sure the game still wants you? - They found me innocent. 180 00:10:18,321 --> 00:10:21,481 - Acquitted or innocent? - Yes, yes. 181 00:10:22,721 --> 00:10:24,401 So, are you up for a walk? 182 00:10:24,521 --> 00:10:26,201 I cycle everywhere now - 183 00:10:26,321 --> 00:10:29,121 fitness and freedom in the one light-alloy machine. 184 00:10:29,241 --> 00:10:31,561 - You can't be serious? - Never give in to it. 185 00:10:31,681 --> 00:10:34,281 - Oh, Barn. - The trick is, embrace the beast. 186 00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:38,401 Trick. It's also a trick to piss-spell your name in snow. 187 00:10:38,521 --> 00:10:41,041 You just end up with yellow slime on your boots. 188 00:10:41,161 --> 00:10:43,721 Trust me - I'm good, Cleave. 189 00:10:43,841 --> 00:10:46,281 It was great to see you. 190 00:10:46,401 --> 00:10:47,921 I'll call you tomorrow. 191 00:10:51,321 --> 00:10:53,081 Barn! 192 00:10:55,041 --> 00:10:56,921 Thank you. 193 00:11:00,001 --> 00:11:02,161 You heard the news, I suppose? 194 00:11:02,281 --> 00:11:05,641 Cal McGregor's out and Cleaver Greene just got acquitted. 195 00:11:05,761 --> 00:11:09,921 I heard. Two arseholes released to make way for most of my front bench. 196 00:11:10,041 --> 00:11:12,281 The big positive about Les getting jailed 197 00:11:12,401 --> 00:11:14,481 is that it weakens the Right's grip on the party. 198 00:11:14,601 --> 00:11:16,921 So, if we woo Bryce, we've got the centre alliance 199 00:11:17,041 --> 00:11:18,401 and we own Sussex Street. 200 00:11:18,521 --> 00:11:21,361 How can there still be factions? There are 12 of us. 201 00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:23,561 There are still 12 of us, aren't there, Clayton? 202 00:11:23,681 --> 00:11:26,761 Geoff and Alsop are giving their statements now to the Commission. 203 00:11:26,881 --> 00:11:29,041 Both gave me their word they're not involved. 204 00:11:29,161 --> 00:11:31,121 Both made public statements to that effect. 205 00:11:31,241 --> 00:11:33,601 - So all good? - Alsop should be fine. 206 00:11:33,721 --> 00:11:35,801 And Geoff? 207 00:11:35,921 --> 00:11:39,481 Jesus! Is there anyone in this party not involved in graft? 208 00:11:39,601 --> 00:11:43,241 - That's not rhetorical, by the way. - You're holding the reins, mate. 209 00:11:43,361 --> 00:11:45,201 You've got a 21% approval rating, 210 00:11:45,321 --> 00:11:47,521 which is not bad, given the state of the party. 211 00:11:47,641 --> 00:11:50,841 I wonder how that 21% decided they like me. I haven't done anything yet. 212 00:11:50,961 --> 00:11:52,961 Plus, the whole gay question's gone away. 213 00:11:53,081 --> 00:11:56,361 They think I'm gay because I support same-sex marriage? 214 00:11:56,481 --> 00:12:00,281 Well, you're not married. Well-groomed. 215 00:12:00,401 --> 00:12:01,761 Nice bloke. 216 00:12:01,881 --> 00:12:05,001 And that celebrity prostitute you were engaged to 217 00:12:05,121 --> 00:12:09,281 described you as 'honourable' and 'decent' - all code words. 218 00:12:34,281 --> 00:12:36,081 What are you doing here? 219 00:12:37,081 --> 00:12:39,361 - I live here. - No, you live in prison. 220 00:12:39,481 --> 00:12:41,041 Oh, sorry. 221 00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:42,721 Oh, how great! 222 00:12:42,841 --> 00:12:46,001 The appeal, they actually let you out. 223 00:12:46,121 --> 00:12:49,121 Well, good. That's... Oh, it's good to see you. 224 00:12:49,241 --> 00:12:50,641 Sorry, I wasn't... 225 00:12:50,761 --> 00:12:53,961 The general feeling was, they wouldn't... 226 00:12:54,081 --> 00:12:56,401 You remember my mother, Maria? 227 00:12:59,841 --> 00:13:01,201 Hey, Cleave. 228 00:13:01,321 --> 00:13:03,881 I could have dinked ya. 229 00:13:06,441 --> 00:13:09,401 There's a very small, bald person. 230 00:13:09,521 --> 00:13:12,561 lain Vargas Meagher, meet Cleaver Greene. 231 00:13:12,681 --> 00:13:16,361 Barney, can you... stop that? That is disgusting. 232 00:13:16,481 --> 00:13:19,841 Just reminding the lad where he came from. 233 00:13:19,961 --> 00:13:22,161 New life, eh, Cleave? 234 00:13:22,281 --> 00:13:26,481 I've got to fly. I'm helping out at the school this arvo. 235 00:13:28,601 --> 00:13:30,921 - Oh, sorry. - That's alright. 236 00:13:32,201 --> 00:13:33,681 Right. 237 00:13:36,241 --> 00:13:37,841 So, um... 238 00:13:37,961 --> 00:13:43,441 You can sleep on the couch tonight. Mum's a bit of a snorer. 239 00:13:43,561 --> 00:13:47,761 You had Barney's baby. 240 00:13:47,881 --> 00:13:52,041 You had a baby with Barney. 241 00:13:52,161 --> 00:13:54,801 With Barney! A b-b-baby. 242 00:13:54,921 --> 00:13:58,721 That's the situa... Is that what has happened here? 243 00:13:58,841 --> 00:14:01,761 The paperwork would indicate that is the case. 244 00:14:01,881 --> 00:14:06,001 OK, so he's lost a ball and he's fathered a baby? 245 00:14:06,121 --> 00:14:08,841 - Yep. - And you called the baby 'Ian'? 246 00:14:08,961 --> 00:14:11,161 It's spelled I-A-I-N. 247 00:14:11,281 --> 00:14:13,521 Oh, that makes all the difference - 'Ee-ayn.' 248 00:14:13,641 --> 00:14:15,121 I've got to go, so... 249 00:14:15,241 --> 00:14:20,121 So, what? You're off working for another barrister now? 250 00:14:20,241 --> 00:14:21,761 I am living the dream. 251 00:14:21,881 --> 00:14:25,641 Of all the things I've heard so far today, that would surprise me the least. 252 00:14:27,201 --> 00:14:33,681 OK. I've got to get a cash flow going. I've got to get some clients on the go. 253 00:14:33,801 --> 00:14:36,681 I've got to get a little space somewhere else. 254 00:14:36,801 --> 00:14:38,561 Like I said, I'm on my way. 255 00:14:38,681 --> 00:14:42,081 That's been cut off, so you'll need to use your mobile. 256 00:14:42,201 --> 00:14:43,721 I don't have a mobile! 257 00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:47,441 Until a couple of minutes ago, I was a murderer. 258 00:14:59,641 --> 00:15:01,121 Beautiful. 259 00:15:03,281 --> 00:15:04,641 Malcolm Finnane? 260 00:15:04,761 --> 00:15:07,121 Where's Malcolm Finnane? 261 00:15:07,241 --> 00:15:09,841 - I'm Finnane. - Look at you. 262 00:15:09,961 --> 00:15:15,201 Straight out of deepest, darkest prison. How long inside, Malcolm? 263 00:15:15,321 --> 00:15:17,281 - 17 years. - Wonderful. 264 00:15:17,401 --> 00:15:19,401 - And now on parole? - Yep. 265 00:15:19,521 --> 00:15:24,281 I know I'm being a gay cliché, but at 3:20am in my cold, little flat, 266 00:15:24,401 --> 00:15:26,121 do you know what I thought? 267 00:15:26,241 --> 00:15:29,161 - No. - 'I'm listening to the next Susan Boyle 268 00:15:29,281 --> 00:15:30,641 except in prison.' 269 00:15:30,761 --> 00:15:33,441 You are not to go through that door. 270 00:15:33,561 --> 00:15:38,281 I am exercising a super veto card. No audition - straight to air. 271 00:15:38,401 --> 00:15:41,281 The first time our judges hear you will be on Monday 7th July 272 00:15:41,401 --> 00:15:42,761 when all of Australia does. 273 00:15:42,881 --> 00:15:47,921 Tuesday, the name 'Malcolm Finnane' will be viral. 274 00:15:51,961 --> 00:15:53,321 So I'm on the show? 275 00:15:53,441 --> 00:15:55,961 You'll be singing Valjean. Of course you know the song? 276 00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:59,841 Yes, I've heard it, but I was going to sing the aria from Tosca. 277 00:15:59,961 --> 00:16:03,241 Valjean, Les Mis - One Day More. 278 00:16:03,361 --> 00:16:06,201 And you and I are friends for eternity. 279 00:16:26,201 --> 00:16:27,681 Bye-bye. 280 00:16:39,321 --> 00:16:42,041 Fuzz, this is your old dad. 281 00:16:42,161 --> 00:16:45,041 I am a free man, mate. 282 00:16:45,161 --> 00:16:47,881 I am cleared of all charges, 283 00:16:48,001 --> 00:16:51,521 and I'm hanging out to see you, pal. Can't wait. 284 00:16:51,641 --> 00:16:54,601 I'm going to swing by the house later on, OK? See ya. 285 00:16:54,721 --> 00:16:56,201 Harley, mate! 286 00:17:03,121 --> 00:17:04,721 Harley! 287 00:17:04,841 --> 00:17:07,561 Cleave! I thought you were in the nick. 288 00:17:07,681 --> 00:17:11,561 The court saw the error of its ways. What are you up for? 289 00:17:11,681 --> 00:17:13,841 - Bit of murder. - Fantastic. 290 00:17:13,961 --> 00:17:17,641 I'm here for you. Give us a call. Actually, don't call me! 291 00:17:17,761 --> 00:17:21,881 - I'm going to write down my address. - Mate, I'm seeing someone. Sorry. 292 00:17:23,801 --> 00:17:25,841 Tadpole! What are you up for? 293 00:17:25,961 --> 00:17:27,641 Arson. Bye, Cleave. 294 00:17:39,721 --> 00:17:41,761 Oh, yes. 295 00:17:41,881 --> 00:17:43,241 Ah! 296 00:17:43,361 --> 00:17:48,441 My client, my secretary, my best friend's wife. 297 00:17:48,561 --> 00:17:49,921 You were in prison. 298 00:17:50,041 --> 00:17:54,281 So you decided to steal my secretary and my entire client base? 299 00:17:54,401 --> 00:17:58,641 Your client base? A rag-bag cluster of low-life sink hair? 300 00:17:58,761 --> 00:18:00,121 Not you, Harley. 301 00:18:00,241 --> 00:18:02,081 Barney referred them to me. 302 00:18:02,201 --> 00:18:03,961 Nobody thought to ask me? 303 00:18:04,081 --> 00:18:05,961 Why would we need to ask you? 304 00:18:06,081 --> 00:18:11,041 These guys need a counsel who could physically attend a courtroom. 305 00:18:11,161 --> 00:18:14,881 I'm sorry - you two, together, in the... 306 00:18:15,001 --> 00:18:19,361 This woman, she has had your husband's love child. 307 00:18:19,481 --> 00:18:23,401 Yes. She and her are well aware of that. 308 00:18:23,521 --> 00:18:26,921 What do you want me to do, demonise her? We've worked through the issues. 309 00:18:27,041 --> 00:18:31,441 We sat down and we talked it out. Maybe you should try it some time. 310 00:18:31,561 --> 00:18:34,001 Yeah. We cried and laughed. 311 00:18:34,121 --> 00:18:38,441 The fact Barney has cancer brings us even closer together. 312 00:18:38,561 --> 00:18:41,881 We realised we actually like each other. 313 00:18:42,001 --> 00:18:44,041 Best buds, aren't we, Nic? 314 00:18:44,161 --> 00:18:46,881 I've died. I'm in hell. 315 00:18:47,001 --> 00:18:49,401 It's a never-ending chick flick. 316 00:18:49,521 --> 00:18:51,881 And you! 317 00:18:52,001 --> 00:18:54,841 You and I are family. I've watched you grow over the years. 318 00:18:54,961 --> 00:18:58,281 Three assaults, one possession of an illegal firearm. 319 00:18:58,401 --> 00:19:00,041 Who was there by your side every time? 320 00:19:00,161 --> 00:19:01,681 - You were, mate. - Me. 321 00:19:01,801 --> 00:19:03,161 Who talked a judge down 322 00:19:03,281 --> 00:19:05,721 from a three-year to a nine-month suspended sentence? 323 00:19:05,841 --> 00:19:07,401 - You did. - Me. 324 00:19:07,521 --> 00:19:09,801 Who was there for your brother's first GBH 325 00:19:09,921 --> 00:19:12,201 and your cousin's assault with a deadly weapon? 326 00:19:12,321 --> 00:19:16,601 Me, me, me. And now that you get a decent murder, where are you? 327 00:19:16,721 --> 00:19:20,521 Off with somebody else. Well, that's loyalty, that's friendship for you. 328 00:19:20,641 --> 00:19:22,281 Cleaver, your world is different now. 329 00:19:22,401 --> 00:19:25,161 Harley is completely free to choose whomever he likes. 330 00:19:25,281 --> 00:19:27,561 If he wants to walk back to a man who has no chambers... 331 00:19:27,681 --> 00:19:29,041 No phone. 332 00:19:29,161 --> 00:19:32,241 ..no standing in the legal world, then please do so, Harley. 333 00:19:32,361 --> 00:19:35,041 But otherwise, I've got a meeting to go to. 334 00:19:35,161 --> 00:19:38,921 Alright, well, fuck you all very much. 335 00:19:39,041 --> 00:19:43,281 And I'll... I'll be OK to find my own way out. 336 00:19:43,401 --> 00:19:45,721 And I do have a phone, by the way. 337 00:19:46,881 --> 00:19:48,801 Gareth, my old friend. 338 00:19:48,921 --> 00:19:51,361 Cleaver. Cleaver Greene. 339 00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:53,561 Yes. No, out. 340 00:19:53,681 --> 00:19:55,441 Out, cleared, innocent. 341 00:19:55,561 --> 00:19:57,161 Yeah, OK - quashed. 342 00:19:57,281 --> 00:19:59,281 I'm out, I'm available for work. 343 00:19:59,401 --> 00:20:02,761 Cindy, baby. Cleaver Greene. How are you? 344 00:20:02,881 --> 00:20:06,721 Listen, ah, just to say that if you needed... 345 00:20:06,841 --> 00:20:11,361 OK, well, there are other barristers than her, and I am one of them. 346 00:20:14,001 --> 00:20:16,561 Arrgh! 347 00:20:16,681 --> 00:20:19,001 - Shit! - Damn! Are you alright? 348 00:20:19,121 --> 00:20:22,521 Yeah. I just got attacked by some battleship cruiser. 349 00:20:25,001 --> 00:20:27,361 Do you think, just for once, we could do this in a hotel? 350 00:20:27,481 --> 00:20:32,081 This is the only secure place. Mother doesn't mind, I promise. 351 00:20:32,201 --> 00:20:35,961 I mind. This has got to stop. 352 00:20:37,281 --> 00:20:39,521 This is wrong on so many levels. 353 00:20:39,641 --> 00:20:42,281 He had a baby with somebody else. 354 00:20:42,401 --> 00:20:43,961 You were going to leave him, then... 355 00:20:44,081 --> 00:20:46,361 Yes, then. 356 00:20:46,481 --> 00:20:51,801 Until he's either better or... not, I can't do this anymore, 357 00:20:51,921 --> 00:20:55,841 not with Simon Le Bon looking down on me and the TV blaring in the next room. 358 00:20:55,961 --> 00:20:58,561 I know. Babe, please. 359 00:20:59,561 --> 00:21:02,161 I can't live without you. I just... 360 00:21:03,281 --> 00:21:06,841 There's someone outside. I think it's a journo. 361 00:21:06,961 --> 00:21:09,321 Not everyone in the world is a journo. 362 00:21:09,441 --> 00:21:10,801 Why would he be interested in 363 00:21:10,921 --> 00:21:13,921 tailing the leader of the world's smallest opposition party? 364 00:21:14,041 --> 00:21:16,721 Have you been talking to Greene about this? 365 00:21:16,841 --> 00:21:21,601 Yeah. I thought he should know, and I showed him photos. 366 00:21:23,041 --> 00:21:27,681 No, please. Just stick around, just until I've gone. 367 00:21:29,641 --> 00:21:32,161 Mum really likes you. 368 00:21:32,281 --> 00:21:34,321 I love you. 369 00:21:39,841 --> 00:21:41,921 Lincoln! 370 00:21:42,041 --> 00:21:43,921 Lincoln, Lincoln! 371 00:21:44,041 --> 00:21:45,401 Mate! 372 00:21:45,521 --> 00:21:47,081 I have missed you. 373 00:21:47,201 --> 00:21:48,881 - You're out! - I'm out. 374 00:21:49,001 --> 00:21:51,801 I went to visit you about half a dozen times. 375 00:21:51,921 --> 00:21:54,121 They said you said, 'Piss off.' 376 00:21:54,241 --> 00:21:58,881 And you believed them? Mate! I was in solitary for four months. 377 00:21:59,001 --> 00:22:02,921 I couldn't get a note out. I'm writing a book about it. 378 00:22:03,041 --> 00:22:06,801 Wow. So... are you out on parole? 379 00:22:06,921 --> 00:22:09,841 No, no. I'm free, innocent. 380 00:22:10,841 --> 00:22:12,441 Acquitted or quashed? 381 00:22:12,561 --> 00:22:16,721 Yeah. So, free for work, huh? Old times. 382 00:22:16,841 --> 00:22:21,161 Oh, no. I've got nothing worthy of you. I've got tiny stuff. 383 00:22:21,281 --> 00:22:24,241 I've got a DUI. The guy wanted to fight it but I said it's probably... 384 00:22:24,361 --> 00:22:28,961 Oh, come on. If four months in solitary has taught me anything, 385 00:22:29,081 --> 00:22:33,281 it's that every man must stand and fight for his rights. 386 00:22:34,681 --> 00:22:36,161 Mr McGregor! 387 00:22:38,881 --> 00:22:42,921 Let me not keep you good folk out here in this winter chill. 388 00:22:44,321 --> 00:22:47,321 I am genuinely grateful for my time here. 389 00:22:47,441 --> 00:22:51,601 It gave me a chance to reflect 390 00:22:51,721 --> 00:22:55,521 and to ask some pretty serious questions of myself. 391 00:22:55,641 --> 00:23:00,481 I now realise that in my zealousness to protect the great people of this State, 392 00:23:00,601 --> 00:23:04,401 I lost my own moral compass. 393 00:23:04,521 --> 00:23:07,241 Mr McGregor, one more question before you go. 394 00:23:07,361 --> 00:23:10,841 Cal, Cal? So what now? What for the future? 395 00:23:10,961 --> 00:23:16,521 Well, apart from a life of service, I really haven't given it any thought. 396 00:23:16,641 --> 00:23:19,481 - God bless. - Thank you, Mr McGregor. 397 00:23:56,561 --> 00:23:58,081 God bless you, Mick. 398 00:24:19,561 --> 00:24:23,041 Get me the fuck out of this shithole, will you? 399 00:24:26,321 --> 00:24:27,681 Oh, yeah! 400 00:24:27,801 --> 00:24:29,441 Ah, no. 401 00:24:31,241 --> 00:24:33,081 No speak Polish. 402 00:24:33,201 --> 00:24:35,481 No Polish. No. 403 00:24:36,601 --> 00:24:38,881 Sorry. Bye-bye now. 404 00:24:59,881 --> 00:25:02,001 Oh, my God! 405 00:25:02,121 --> 00:25:04,321 Cleave! Oh, your appeal! 406 00:25:04,441 --> 00:25:07,561 - You're out! - Yes. Yes, I'm out. 407 00:25:07,681 --> 00:25:09,841 There's a big for-sale sign. 408 00:25:09,961 --> 00:25:12,721 Yes, you can't stay. As soon as the bread has finished baking, 409 00:25:12,841 --> 00:25:14,801 we've got to go. We're open for inspection. 410 00:25:14,921 --> 00:25:19,041 - Are we? - Come and have a quick glass of wine. 411 00:25:19,161 --> 00:25:21,921 - Roger's here? - Yeah, Roger lives here now. 412 00:25:22,041 --> 00:25:23,801 Oh, Roger lives here now. 413 00:25:23,921 --> 00:25:26,361 Where's Fuzz? Why wasn't he at my bloody appeal? 414 00:25:26,481 --> 00:25:28,041 You could have at least sent him. 415 00:25:28,161 --> 00:25:31,321 He might have forgotten. He's doing this intensive study course. 416 00:25:31,441 --> 00:25:33,521 - He's going to work in Africa. - Hello, Cleaver. 417 00:25:33,641 --> 00:25:36,161 Welcome back to the land of the living. How was it in there? 418 00:25:36,281 --> 00:25:39,041 - Work in Africa? - He and Tara are going to the Congo 419 00:25:39,161 --> 00:25:41,881 to build hospitals and schools and sing happy hymns. 420 00:25:42,001 --> 00:25:43,881 - He's very committed to it. - Bloody Congo? 421 00:25:44,001 --> 00:25:46,841 No son of mine is going to do good works. 422 00:25:46,961 --> 00:25:48,361 What happened to university? 423 00:25:48,481 --> 00:25:51,521 - His father went to prison. - How long have I been asleep? 424 00:25:51,641 --> 00:25:54,961 What happened to the world while I was inside? I feel like Rumpelstiltskin. 425 00:25:55,081 --> 00:25:58,481 - We sat down as a family and decided... - What family was this? 426 00:25:58,601 --> 00:26:02,161 Fuzz and myself and Roger and Tara, we all agreed 427 00:26:02,281 --> 00:26:05,361 that you were too much a part of this house and we needed to move forward. 428 00:26:05,481 --> 00:26:08,401 Oh, did we? Did we all have a vote on that? 429 00:26:08,521 --> 00:26:11,441 It was like you were dead, Cleave. 430 00:26:11,561 --> 00:26:16,001 There were too many sad memories and there was too much shit. 431 00:26:16,121 --> 00:26:17,881 Rip van Winkle. 432 00:26:18,881 --> 00:26:20,241 What? 433 00:26:20,361 --> 00:26:23,641 It was Rip van Winkle who slept for 100 years. 434 00:26:23,761 --> 00:26:26,441 Rumpelstiltskin was the riddle guy. 435 00:26:26,561 --> 00:26:28,801 You're killing me. You know that, Wendy? 436 00:26:28,921 --> 00:26:30,441 I'm not meaning to. 437 00:26:33,921 --> 00:26:36,201 We're getting married, mate. 438 00:26:41,321 --> 00:26:45,721 Blow, bugles, blow Set wild echoes flying 439 00:26:45,841 --> 00:26:51,001 Blow, bugles Answer echoes dying, dying, dying. 440 00:26:51,121 --> 00:26:54,641 - It was Rip van Winkle. 441 00:27:22,561 --> 00:27:24,881 I didn't think I'd hear from you for days. 442 00:27:25,001 --> 00:27:28,401 I thought you'd be doing some massive family thing. 443 00:27:28,521 --> 00:27:32,321 Oh, you know, they all wanted to. I was keen to keep it low-key. 444 00:27:32,441 --> 00:27:34,241 I've got some news. 445 00:27:34,361 --> 00:27:38,121 I followed your advice. I did that audition thing. 446 00:27:38,241 --> 00:27:41,201 And Tarquin, he heard my tape. He really liked it. 447 00:27:41,321 --> 00:27:45,601 A turtle listened to your tape? Oh, no. That's a terrapin. 448 00:27:45,721 --> 00:27:49,041 He reckons I could be some kind of sensation. I don't really believe him. 449 00:27:49,161 --> 00:27:52,761 Would you come? It would mean a mountain if you did. 450 00:27:52,881 --> 00:27:54,961 - Monday the 9th? - Sure, mate. 451 00:27:55,081 --> 00:27:58,441 Sorry, what are we talking about here? What did I recommend? 452 00:27:58,561 --> 00:28:02,321 You said I should audition for Aussies Gotta Sing. 453 00:28:02,441 --> 00:28:03,801 - Did I? - Yeah. 454 00:28:03,921 --> 00:28:07,721 You said, 'If you make your voice heard, then people will listen.' 455 00:28:07,841 --> 00:28:11,041 You said, 'Follow your dreams, my friend.' 456 00:28:11,161 --> 00:28:13,361 Mm. Right. 457 00:28:13,481 --> 00:28:15,641 Sorry, mate - which show is it? 458 00:28:15,761 --> 00:28:20,001 Is it the one where everybody's nice to you or the one with the arsehole? 459 00:28:20,121 --> 00:28:21,481 Yeah, Gordon. 460 00:28:21,601 --> 00:28:22,961 Yeah, he's famous. 461 00:28:23,081 --> 00:28:27,401 Increasingly, I hear people are famous. I've no idea who any of them are. 462 00:28:27,521 --> 00:28:29,561 He had a massive hit - Toledo Mio. 463 00:28:29,681 --> 00:28:33,161 Oh, Gordon Martin, Toledo Mio. 464 00:28:33,281 --> 00:28:36,921 Oh, yes. Early '90s - '92, '93. 465 00:28:37,041 --> 00:28:40,241 Must have charted for about three minutes in the top ten. 466 00:28:40,361 --> 00:28:44,161 Do you really think it's a good idea to let yourself be judged by this man? 467 00:28:44,281 --> 00:28:47,001 You don't think I should do it? You think it's a mistake? 468 00:28:47,121 --> 00:28:49,201 No, no. No. 469 00:28:49,321 --> 00:28:53,401 Just don't put too much weight in that clown's opinion. 470 00:28:53,521 --> 00:28:56,721 This is it for me, mate. It's my only way out. 471 00:28:56,841 --> 00:29:00,201 I'm not like you. You can jump straight back in. 472 00:29:00,321 --> 00:29:04,361 If I can do this, if I can get a little bit famous, you know? 473 00:29:04,481 --> 00:29:07,481 People forgive you, don't they? 474 00:29:09,521 --> 00:29:10,881 Yeah. 475 00:29:11,001 --> 00:29:12,601 Yeah! 476 00:29:12,721 --> 00:29:18,201 Fame is the great get-out-of-jail-free card. 477 00:29:20,521 --> 00:29:28,281 If you take away the senseless violence, fear for your life, man rape, 478 00:29:28,401 --> 00:29:30,841 the slammer wasn't so bad, was it? 479 00:29:30,961 --> 00:29:34,041 You know, quiet cell, pleasant company. 480 00:29:34,161 --> 00:29:39,641 I reckon that year with you was one of the happiest of my life. 481 00:29:39,761 --> 00:29:44,681 Fuck, mate. It hasn't been all Vogue Living in your life, has it? 482 00:29:44,801 --> 00:29:46,441 Don't do that. 483 00:29:47,561 --> 00:29:49,601 I'll get you another drink. 484 00:30:04,801 --> 00:30:06,681 Sh, sh! 485 00:30:06,801 --> 00:30:08,961 Sorry. 486 00:30:09,081 --> 00:30:11,121 - Shut up! 487 00:30:11,241 --> 00:30:13,321 Thanks a bloody bundle. 488 00:30:13,441 --> 00:30:15,761 I'm sorry. I completely forgot. 489 00:30:15,881 --> 00:30:20,241 There's a new world order. I'm in Topsy-Turvy Land. 490 00:30:26,481 --> 00:30:28,361 No, they're not going to have any sex. 491 00:30:42,641 --> 00:30:44,841 Did you take my mother's phone? 492 00:30:44,961 --> 00:30:46,601 What? 493 00:30:46,721 --> 00:30:48,281 No! 494 00:30:48,401 --> 00:30:50,521 What does it look like? 495 00:30:53,241 --> 00:30:55,481 ♪ Oh, Toledo 496 00:30:55,601 --> 00:30:59,601 ♪ Gonna give my baby the heave-ho. ♪ 497 00:31:24,841 --> 00:31:26,321 Morning. 498 00:31:32,481 --> 00:31:33,961 Ah, Chantelle. 499 00:31:40,881 --> 00:31:43,601 Holy sh... Tikki! 500 00:31:43,721 --> 00:31:46,401 Hello, Cal sweetie. 501 00:31:46,521 --> 00:31:48,721 How's the hotel? How were the girls? 502 00:31:48,841 --> 00:31:50,961 Oh. Oh, very good. 503 00:31:51,081 --> 00:31:52,721 Thank you, Tikki. 504 00:31:52,841 --> 00:31:55,321 I didn't realise you were coming. Let me get changed. 505 00:31:55,441 --> 00:31:58,721 No! Sit down. Relax. 506 00:31:58,841 --> 00:32:00,201 Alright. Alright. 507 00:32:00,321 --> 00:32:02,521 Lovely to see you back in the real world. 508 00:32:02,641 --> 00:32:04,921 - Yes. - So, have you given any thought 509 00:32:05,041 --> 00:32:08,001 to what you might do now that you're out? 510 00:32:08,121 --> 00:32:10,601 Ah, yes. Yeah. I've got a few plans. 511 00:32:10,721 --> 00:32:12,441 Here's what I think we need you to do. 512 00:32:12,561 --> 00:32:16,521 You're going to host a new television program on one of my cable thingies, 513 00:32:16,641 --> 00:32:20,601 and I think you would be adorable. 514 00:32:20,721 --> 00:32:24,481 Well! I hadn't really thought of the media, 515 00:32:24,601 --> 00:32:27,401 but it does seem like a natural fit. 516 00:32:27,521 --> 00:32:31,001 A current-affairs, right-slant newsy thing? 517 00:32:31,121 --> 00:32:33,161 Whatever you like, darling. 518 00:32:33,281 --> 00:32:36,481 Bit of a rant, mostly gambling and scandal. 519 00:32:36,601 --> 00:32:38,761 That's what the public needs. 520 00:32:38,881 --> 00:32:42,561 I presume there's strings attached to this? 521 00:32:42,681 --> 00:32:45,001 More ropes than strings, pet. 522 00:32:45,121 --> 00:32:49,561 I need you to be au fait with my new business model. 523 00:32:49,681 --> 00:32:52,761 Have you got a dollar coin there, love? 524 00:32:53,761 --> 00:32:55,401 Yeah, yes. 525 00:32:56,601 --> 00:32:59,201 Just pop your one dollar into that. 526 00:33:00,721 --> 00:33:03,761 And I give you back, say, 20 cents. 527 00:33:03,881 --> 00:33:05,281 Uh-huh. 528 00:33:05,401 --> 00:33:09,681 80 for me, 20 for you. It's the perfect business model. 529 00:33:09,801 --> 00:33:12,281 It's called a casino. 530 00:33:12,401 --> 00:33:15,921 I am currently tendering to build a new one. 531 00:33:16,041 --> 00:33:19,201 I want to create something magnificent, 532 00:33:19,321 --> 00:33:22,081 a great cathedral, 533 00:33:22,201 --> 00:33:26,481 where people of all nations, mainly China and Singapore, 534 00:33:26,601 --> 00:33:29,201 come to worship in its chambers. 535 00:33:29,321 --> 00:33:35,481 But I'm copping a lot of flack - churches and anti-gambling lobbyists. 536 00:33:35,601 --> 00:33:38,241 There's even talk of it being a sacred site. 537 00:33:38,361 --> 00:33:41,361 How can land on Sydney Harbour be sacred? 538 00:33:41,481 --> 00:33:43,561 The place is a festival of desecration. 539 00:33:43,681 --> 00:33:45,041 Exactly. 540 00:33:45,161 --> 00:33:47,841 Cal, I want it more than my children. 541 00:33:49,321 --> 00:33:53,521 And I need a brave captain at the helm to avoid those icebergs. 542 00:33:53,641 --> 00:33:55,001 You are that man. 543 00:33:55,121 --> 00:33:56,601 Come, Jerry. 544 00:33:57,761 --> 00:33:59,641 Right, well, I'm with you, Tikki. 545 00:33:59,761 --> 00:34:03,241 Specifically though, what do you want me to do? 546 00:34:03,361 --> 00:34:05,921 Just follow the bouncing ball, Cal. 547 00:34:06,041 --> 00:34:09,241 - Bye, Cal. - Yeah, bye, Jerry. Good to... 548 00:34:09,361 --> 00:34:11,401 - ..see you. 549 00:34:15,961 --> 00:34:18,001 Glen was three points over. 550 00:34:19,441 --> 00:34:21,281 He needs his car for work. 551 00:34:21,401 --> 00:34:23,081 Why are we meeting here? 552 00:34:23,201 --> 00:34:28,561 Ah, Glen, I just think that it's a lot less threatening for my client base 553 00:34:28,681 --> 00:34:31,961 if I meet them here rather than in my big, showy chambers - 554 00:34:32,081 --> 00:34:33,841 all that marble and so on. 555 00:34:33,961 --> 00:34:37,601 Would you like a coffee? Maria, if you're not doing anything... 556 00:34:41,161 --> 00:34:45,281 Apparently, the machine's broken again. Polish machine. 557 00:34:45,401 --> 00:34:47,081 Look, I've been thinking. 558 00:34:47,201 --> 00:34:49,881 This is my third time. Probably not worth fighting it. 559 00:34:50,001 --> 00:34:54,401 Really? If I had that attitude, I'd still be in prison. 560 00:34:54,521 --> 00:34:56,281 So would Mandela. 561 00:34:56,401 --> 00:35:00,081 Some things are worth fighting for, mate. 562 00:35:00,201 --> 00:35:05,081 All it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing. 563 00:35:05,201 --> 00:35:07,521 - I was pissed. - Were you? 564 00:35:07,641 --> 00:35:10,441 Are you a doctor? Did the machine get checked? 565 00:35:10,561 --> 00:35:12,961 Was the reading accurate? Did you get a blood test? 566 00:35:13,081 --> 00:35:15,161 No, I refused. I'm haemophiliac. 567 00:35:15,281 --> 00:35:18,281 Well, there you go. We need to fight this. 568 00:35:18,401 --> 00:35:21,361 I was reading an interesting article the other day 569 00:35:21,481 --> 00:35:23,601 from this scientist at the Garrault Institute 570 00:35:23,721 --> 00:35:27,041 who reckons the machine's readings, once you've used it a few times, 571 00:35:27,161 --> 00:35:28,761 they're not necessarily accurate. 572 00:35:28,881 --> 00:35:31,361 I need to meet this person as soon as humanly possible. 573 00:35:34,761 --> 00:35:38,241 I've had two papers published in scientific journals on the subject. 574 00:35:38,361 --> 00:35:40,721 Governments choose to ignore my findings, of course, 575 00:35:40,841 --> 00:35:43,801 breath-testing being such a great source of revenue for them. 576 00:35:43,921 --> 00:35:47,201 But the truth does not disappear simply because it is inconvenient. 577 00:35:47,321 --> 00:35:49,961 Just how inaccurate are these machines, Elliott? 578 00:35:50,081 --> 00:35:55,161 It varies. Science demands exactitude, but usually ends up with probabilities. 579 00:35:55,281 --> 00:35:58,321 When you breathe out, your breath goes directly into there. 580 00:35:58,441 --> 00:36:01,641 With each breath also goes a microscopic amount of alcohol, 581 00:36:01,761 --> 00:36:03,121 or you wouldn't get the reading. 582 00:36:03,241 --> 00:36:06,881 My contention is, the heavier molecular weight of the alcohol 583 00:36:07,001 --> 00:36:08,361 remains in the breathalyser. 584 00:36:08,481 --> 00:36:11,441 If you breath-test, say, 200 people who have been drinking, 585 00:36:11,561 --> 00:36:16,081 the cumulative effect, if you're number 201, can alter the reading 586 00:36:16,201 --> 00:36:18,761 by an as yet unquantifiable but not insignificant margin. 587 00:36:18,881 --> 00:36:21,241 Doubt is all I need to establish. 588 00:36:21,361 --> 00:36:24,121 - You want a demonstration? - Absolutely, we do. 589 00:36:32,321 --> 00:36:33,721 I've been thinking about this. 590 00:36:33,841 --> 00:36:38,921 I don't want to sing light opera. I want to sing real opera. 591 00:36:39,041 --> 00:36:40,721 No. You don't. 592 00:36:40,841 --> 00:36:45,561 You will be Valjean, the part that almost won our Hugh an Oscar. 593 00:36:53,401 --> 00:36:58,681 So, already we're seeing a.0003 variation between the two machines. 594 00:37:00,601 --> 00:37:03,961 Extrapolate that over many people, and you would have to say 595 00:37:04,081 --> 00:37:08,161 the numbers conform to a predictable hyperbolic rise. 596 00:37:08,281 --> 00:37:12,681 Well, let's tease out this hypothesis a little more. 597 00:37:12,801 --> 00:37:14,481 Maybe the pinot next. 598 00:37:14,601 --> 00:37:16,121 Pinot, pinot, pinot. 599 00:37:16,241 --> 00:37:18,281 Ah! Pinot. 600 00:37:18,401 --> 00:37:24,561 If Humberstone is even a quarter of a scintilla near right, 601 00:37:24,681 --> 00:37:26,921 we are made. 602 00:37:27,041 --> 00:37:28,401 We saw the numbers. 603 00:37:28,521 --> 00:37:31,681 How many people have incurred fines on faulty data? 604 00:37:31,801 --> 00:37:35,161 How many licences have been needlessly lost? 605 00:37:35,281 --> 00:37:38,681 As many as there are drops in the ocean. 606 00:37:38,801 --> 00:37:44,201 We are talking a massive class action against government. 607 00:37:44,321 --> 00:37:47,041 More than the stars in the sky. 608 00:37:47,161 --> 00:37:53,281 Are we absolutely convinced this guy's scientific qualifications stack up? 609 00:37:53,401 --> 00:37:54,921 A 100 per cent! 610 00:37:55,041 --> 00:37:56,961 Right. 611 00:37:57,081 --> 00:37:59,721 Then get it up on your website. 612 00:37:59,841 --> 00:38:05,241 Tell everyone who has ever had a DUI that there is a class action a-coming. 613 00:38:05,361 --> 00:38:07,841 Put my name and number to it 614 00:38:07,961 --> 00:38:14,401 and stand back and behold the glorious tidal wave to come. 615 00:38:14,521 --> 00:38:20,561 OK, I have you on 9th July - a DUI. What do we think, gentlemen, 15 minutes? 616 00:38:20,681 --> 00:38:25,641 I think more like two days, Your Honour. This is a very complex case. 617 00:38:25,761 --> 00:38:27,121 No. How? 618 00:38:27,241 --> 00:38:31,161 Well, my client has a number of work- and home-related factors 619 00:38:31,281 --> 00:38:34,761 that I believe have considerable bearing on this case, Your Honour. 620 00:38:34,881 --> 00:38:36,921 Fine. 20 minutes, then. 621 00:38:37,041 --> 00:38:40,161 And I have a welter of scientific evidence 622 00:38:40,281 --> 00:38:44,241 provided by an expert witness that has grave implications 623 00:38:44,361 --> 00:38:45,721 for the entire legal system. 624 00:38:45,841 --> 00:38:48,841 OK! Back to 15. 625 00:38:50,201 --> 00:38:52,041 Who is this man? 626 00:38:52,161 --> 00:38:54,281 What is his story? 627 00:38:54,401 --> 00:38:58,081 On Monday 9th July, a very special edition 628 00:38:58,201 --> 00:39:01,841 of Aussies Gotta Sing, where, for the very first time, 629 00:39:01,961 --> 00:39:05,081 the surprise card will be played. 630 00:39:05,201 --> 00:39:11,361 This man will appear before our judges, untried, unproven, 631 00:39:11,481 --> 00:39:14,241 and with a shocking secret. 632 00:39:14,361 --> 00:39:16,521 He will face final judgement. 633 00:39:16,641 --> 00:39:21,521 Has Edie Newbar finally met her match? 634 00:39:23,041 --> 00:39:27,321 So we bring him on. You pretend you know nothing about him. 635 00:39:27,441 --> 00:39:30,641 Shock, horror, reveal. He's humiliated. 636 00:39:30,761 --> 00:39:32,121 I know the drill. 637 00:39:32,241 --> 00:39:36,561 But really push it to fight stage. Then he rallies and sings. 638 00:39:36,681 --> 00:39:39,161 We line up lots of people in the audience to whoop, 639 00:39:39,281 --> 00:39:42,001 then you slowly rise to your feet and clap. 640 00:39:42,121 --> 00:39:43,841 Right, can the prick actually sing? 641 00:39:43,961 --> 00:39:46,441 Oh, I think so. It's opera. 642 00:39:46,561 --> 00:39:49,161 The guy's a bona fide murderer. This isn't just us. 643 00:39:49,281 --> 00:39:51,841 This is going to be news. He's good for eight weeks. 644 00:39:51,961 --> 00:39:53,561 - Eight weeks? - Minimum. 645 00:39:53,681 --> 00:39:57,321 - We need Gordon in make-up now. - That's good. I'm coming. 646 00:40:00,361 --> 00:40:03,881 Your Honour, there are many grounds on which I could defend my client today. 647 00:40:04,001 --> 00:40:05,921 Glen Hansi - family man 648 00:40:06,041 --> 00:40:09,681 and production manager at an aluminium-guttering company. 649 00:40:09,801 --> 00:40:11,161 I could argue emotional stress. 650 00:40:11,281 --> 00:40:14,521 His wife of eight years recently left him for another woman, 651 00:40:14,641 --> 00:40:16,801 which has seen him in the hands of a psychologist 652 00:40:16,921 --> 00:40:20,961 with whom he's already confronting head-on the issue of substance abuse. 653 00:40:21,081 --> 00:40:25,161 Yes. Indeed, there is considerable precedent for such a submission. 654 00:40:25,281 --> 00:40:28,321 But I'm not going to argue that today, Your Honour. 655 00:40:28,441 --> 00:40:31,841 I could argue that his contact with his two young children 656 00:40:31,961 --> 00:40:34,641 will be severely curtailed if he cannot drive 657 00:40:34,761 --> 00:40:38,521 and that his career in aluminium extrusions could be lost. 658 00:40:38,641 --> 00:40:40,321 Crown and Bayliss, indeed. 659 00:40:40,441 --> 00:40:43,081 But I'm not going to argue any of these here today. 660 00:40:43,201 --> 00:40:44,721 Then why mention them? 661 00:40:44,841 --> 00:40:48,441 Because, Your Honour, there are bigger fish to fry here today. 662 00:40:48,561 --> 00:40:50,801 Which still begs my initial question - 663 00:40:50,921 --> 00:40:53,001 why bother to mention the other reasons at all? 664 00:40:53,121 --> 00:40:55,801 I'm trying to establish a context, Your Honour. 665 00:40:55,921 --> 00:41:02,321 What if I could prove here and now that the entire foundation of this case 666 00:41:02,441 --> 00:41:05,921 and potentially thousands of similar cases 667 00:41:06,041 --> 00:41:08,201 are open to serious question? 668 00:41:08,321 --> 00:41:11,641 What if I were to say that there may be prisoners 669 00:41:11,761 --> 00:41:14,001 languishing in prison today 670 00:41:14,121 --> 00:41:18,961 who are entirely innocent or at the very least worthy of acquittal 671 00:41:19,081 --> 00:41:22,881 on the basis of a fundamentally flawed technology? 672 00:41:23,001 --> 00:41:26,801 I would say, get on with it, and quick. 673 00:41:26,921 --> 00:41:28,881 Indeed. 674 00:41:29,001 --> 00:41:34,481 And to that end, let me call Dr Elliott Humberstone, PhD from Princeton, 675 00:41:34,601 --> 00:41:39,841 post-doctoral thesis from Harvard and foundation member of the famed 676 00:41:39,961 --> 00:41:43,401 Garrault Institute for Future Sciences. 677 00:41:43,521 --> 00:41:47,761 Fine, but can you get him to jog to the stand? 678 00:41:56,081 --> 00:42:00,721 Dr Humberstone, could you detail for the court's benefit 679 00:42:00,841 --> 00:42:03,961 the body of your work for the past 35 years? 680 00:42:04,081 --> 00:42:05,561 Oh, please don't. 681 00:42:05,681 --> 00:42:09,841 I'm prepared to accept that he's a qualified scientist. 682 00:42:09,961 --> 00:42:13,321 Indeed. Dr Humberstone, some years ago, 683 00:42:13,441 --> 00:42:18,521 you began research into the technology behind breath-testing. 684 00:42:18,641 --> 00:42:20,601 Yeah, I did do that, yes. 685 00:42:20,721 --> 00:42:24,281 Yes. Can you tell the court what prompted this? 686 00:42:24,401 --> 00:42:29,801 An epiphany, one of those great moments in science where I realised 687 00:42:29,921 --> 00:42:32,841 the basis upon which the taking of alcohol samples from motorists 688 00:42:32,961 --> 00:42:38,001 was premised on a questionable scientific hypo... hypothesis. 689 00:42:38,121 --> 00:42:41,761 - Is something wrong there, Doctor? - A mild head cold, Your Worship. 690 00:42:41,881 --> 00:42:43,841 Honour. 691 00:42:43,961 --> 00:42:48,361 That the residual accretion of alcoholic vapours 692 00:42:48,481 --> 00:42:53,201 inside the very mechanism of the machine contributed in no small part... 693 00:42:53,321 --> 00:42:56,001 Mr Greene, is your so-called expert witness 694 00:42:56,121 --> 00:42:58,681 three sheets to the wind in my court? 695 00:42:58,801 --> 00:43:00,321 No, I don't believe so. 696 00:43:00,441 --> 00:43:02,561 Why is he wobbling in his chair, then? 697 00:43:02,681 --> 00:43:07,161 He has an inner-ear issue, Your Honour. 698 00:43:07,281 --> 00:43:10,521 I, however, have his findings right here. 699 00:43:10,641 --> 00:43:13,921 If it please the court, I could possibly read them out. 700 00:43:14,041 --> 00:43:17,681 I will not tolerate drunks in my court, Mr Greene. 701 00:43:17,801 --> 00:43:20,001 I'm used to derision. I've been mocked before. 702 00:43:20,121 --> 00:43:24,641 - But I have the science to back up... - Remove this man from my court. 703 00:43:24,761 --> 00:43:32,241 Mr Greene, I realise that this is your first case since your release, 704 00:43:32,361 --> 00:43:35,561 but I've a good mind to find you in contempt. 705 00:43:35,681 --> 00:43:38,281 Your Honour, I have no idea what's happened. 706 00:43:38,401 --> 00:43:41,681 When I met him a couple of weeks ago, he was like a scientist in a movie. 707 00:43:41,801 --> 00:43:44,401 Given that you have refused to plead any alternatives, 708 00:43:44,521 --> 00:43:46,641 I find your client guilty. 709 00:43:46,761 --> 00:43:52,921 I remove his licence for 12 months and fine him $1,500. 710 00:43:53,041 --> 00:43:54,521 Next. 711 00:43:59,801 --> 00:44:02,281 Don't even think about sending a fucking bill. 712 00:44:04,561 --> 00:44:06,641 Ah, that's a shame. 713 00:44:06,761 --> 00:44:08,961 You'll be back in the harness soon. 714 00:44:09,081 --> 00:44:11,521 Saddle, you fuckwit. 715 00:44:16,081 --> 00:44:18,721 ♪ Lovely lady of the sea 716 00:44:18,841 --> 00:44:21,601 ♪ Won't you come and comfort me? ♪ 717 00:44:33,001 --> 00:44:35,201 What the hell is going on, mate? 718 00:44:35,321 --> 00:44:39,881 I don't want to do that song. I want to sing the aria from Tosca. 719 00:44:40,001 --> 00:44:42,321 I can do it unaccompanied. 720 00:44:42,441 --> 00:44:45,281 Let me tell you a little something, Mal. 721 00:44:45,401 --> 00:44:49,121 I don't really know if you can sing or not. Opera all sounds the same to me. 722 00:44:49,241 --> 00:44:52,361 The only thing I do know is either you can play things our way, 723 00:44:52,481 --> 00:44:55,201 or the road to obscurity lies that way. 724 00:44:55,321 --> 00:44:57,761 You have just seconds to choose. 725 00:45:26,281 --> 00:45:27,641 Malcolm, is it? 726 00:45:27,761 --> 00:45:30,041 You're our... 727 00:45:30,161 --> 00:45:32,081 ..surprise card, is that it? 728 00:45:33,681 --> 00:45:37,521 Tell us about yourself. Why haven't we heard of you? 729 00:45:37,641 --> 00:45:40,121 You're not exactly young. 730 00:45:41,761 --> 00:45:44,161 What were you doing before now? 731 00:45:44,281 --> 00:45:47,321 Don't tell me - you were a mime artist. 732 00:45:53,681 --> 00:45:55,881 - I was in prison. - What for? 733 00:45:59,521 --> 00:46:03,801 - I just want to sing. - You were in for wanting to sing? 734 00:46:03,921 --> 00:46:08,361 It says here... murder. 735 00:46:10,361 --> 00:46:11,721 Your father. 736 00:46:11,841 --> 00:46:13,321 Is that right? 737 00:46:15,081 --> 00:46:17,641 Righto, Mal. Give it a go. 738 00:46:17,761 --> 00:46:19,641 Try not to murder the song. 739 00:46:33,601 --> 00:46:35,681 - Aw! - What?! 740 00:46:35,801 --> 00:46:38,481 Did I say something wrong? 741 00:46:40,641 --> 00:46:42,721 Fantastic. 742 00:46:42,841 --> 00:46:47,761 Now just give it 30 seconds. Let the tension build to fever. 743 00:46:47,881 --> 00:46:49,801 Then walk back on as Valjean... 744 00:46:49,921 --> 00:46:52,481 You know what?! 745 00:46:52,601 --> 00:46:54,081 You know what? 746 00:46:59,001 --> 00:47:00,481 Fuck Valjean. 747 00:47:02,561 --> 00:47:04,041 Fuck you. 748 00:47:12,881 --> 00:47:14,921 You stole my mother's phone. 749 00:47:15,041 --> 00:47:16,401 No, I didn't. 750 00:47:16,521 --> 00:47:18,601 Then why are a lot of pissed people ringing her, 751 00:47:18,721 --> 00:47:20,161 demanding legal representation? 752 00:47:20,281 --> 00:47:24,041 OK, maybe I borrowed it by mistake for a couple of days. 753 00:47:24,161 --> 00:47:27,081 You're buying her a new phone and you are paying her last phone bill. 754 00:47:28,681 --> 00:47:30,161 Hello? 755 00:47:31,681 --> 00:47:36,281 Yeah. No, mate. Look, I'm sorry. I can't get your licence back. 756 00:47:36,401 --> 00:47:37,761 No, I... 757 00:47:37,881 --> 00:47:40,401 I know it said that on the website. 758 00:47:41,681 --> 00:47:44,881 OK, same to you. Same to you, pal. 759 00:47:45,001 --> 00:47:46,921 Oh, mate! 760 00:47:47,041 --> 00:47:49,561 Oh, it's so good to see you. 761 00:47:49,681 --> 00:47:51,041 Oh, I've missed you! 762 00:47:51,161 --> 00:47:54,601 How are you, and what's all this shit about you going to the Congo? 763 00:47:54,721 --> 00:47:57,241 You know it's the most dangerous place on earth. 764 00:47:57,361 --> 00:48:01,161 I know. I don't want to talk about that. I came to apologise. 765 00:48:01,281 --> 00:48:04,721 I want to say, I'm sorry for kind of cutting you off, 766 00:48:04,841 --> 00:48:06,921 not visiting so much the past few months. 767 00:48:07,041 --> 00:48:10,561 Oh, that's OK. It must have been a bit embarrassing. 768 00:48:10,681 --> 00:48:13,681 No, that's not why I stopped coming. 769 00:48:13,801 --> 00:48:18,681 I started to get really angry with you, and I had no right to do that. 770 00:48:18,801 --> 00:48:21,161 Yes, you did. I was completely furious with myself. 771 00:48:21,281 --> 00:48:25,121 You are who you are. You can't change that. 772 00:48:25,241 --> 00:48:29,241 No, I can change, and I'm going to change. 773 00:48:29,361 --> 00:48:34,481 No. People kept telling me you couldn't, and I wouldn't believe them. 774 00:48:34,601 --> 00:48:38,481 You're just someone people can't rely on, and that's OK. 775 00:48:38,601 --> 00:48:41,361 I just... I had no right to expect any better. 776 00:48:41,481 --> 00:48:44,121 Fuzz, if this is about dropping out of school... 777 00:48:44,241 --> 00:48:46,601 No, I don't want to study. 778 00:48:46,721 --> 00:48:49,681 I want to be someone who can help people. 779 00:48:49,801 --> 00:48:51,921 I want to be someone people can rely on. 780 00:48:52,041 --> 00:48:55,361 Mate, for someone who's forgiven me, you sound pretty angry. 781 00:48:55,481 --> 00:48:56,841 I promise you, I'm not. 782 00:48:56,961 --> 00:49:00,481 I just don't want to have any expectations of you anymore. 783 00:49:00,601 --> 00:49:02,961 It's too hard. 784 00:49:03,081 --> 00:49:05,721 I'm fine with it. 785 00:49:05,841 --> 00:49:08,881 Well... no. 786 00:49:09,001 --> 00:49:12,761 I'm your father. We have a special relationship. 787 00:49:14,121 --> 00:49:15,601 OK. 788 00:49:17,241 --> 00:49:21,521 I'll call you in a few days, Cleave, catch up before I leave. 789 00:49:21,641 --> 00:49:25,241 'Dad'. Come on, at least call me 'Dad'. 790 00:49:27,561 --> 00:49:29,161 Fuck. 791 00:49:33,121 --> 00:49:34,721 There's a call for you. 792 00:49:34,841 --> 00:49:38,201 Can you just tell them I can't fix any fucking thing? 793 00:49:38,321 --> 00:49:39,921 It's your friend, Mal. 794 00:49:40,041 --> 00:49:43,001 Oh, the turtle show! Oh, shit. Oh, my God. 795 00:49:43,121 --> 00:49:44,481 Mate! 796 00:49:44,601 --> 00:49:50,281 Oh, mate, I'm so sorry. The taxi didn't arrive, and I couldn't... 797 00:49:50,401 --> 00:49:52,281 How did it go? 798 00:49:52,401 --> 00:49:54,401 Oh, I'm sorry. 799 00:49:55,641 --> 00:49:57,121 No, don't be stu... 800 00:49:58,321 --> 00:50:01,001 Don't be crazy, mate. Where are you? 801 00:50:03,201 --> 00:50:05,041 What are you doing? 802 00:50:05,161 --> 00:50:06,681 - What are you doing, Malcolm? - No! 803 00:50:06,801 --> 00:50:10,401 - Get down. - Stop! You stay back. You stay back. 804 00:50:14,081 --> 00:50:16,401 - It's over, Cleave. - Oh, mate. 805 00:50:16,521 --> 00:50:19,921 No, it's all finished now. 806 00:50:20,041 --> 00:50:23,481 Oh, mate, come on. Look, you've got another 50 years. 807 00:50:23,601 --> 00:50:26,561 Is this all about some fucking... stupid talent quest? 808 00:50:26,681 --> 00:50:28,161 No. 809 00:50:29,681 --> 00:50:31,601 No. 810 00:50:31,721 --> 00:50:33,081 That was it, mate. 811 00:50:33,201 --> 00:50:35,881 The world will always be full of people who want to judge you. 812 00:50:36,001 --> 00:50:38,841 You can't let them. Don't give them that power. 813 00:50:38,961 --> 00:50:43,441 Don't give them that power! OK? 814 00:50:43,561 --> 00:50:47,241 Look, things aren't turning out all that well for me either at the moment, 815 00:50:47,361 --> 00:50:51,161 but you have to believe that things can change, alright? 816 00:50:51,281 --> 00:50:52,841 They change. They do. 817 00:50:52,961 --> 00:50:57,321 No, some lives don't change, do they, Cleave? 818 00:50:59,841 --> 00:51:01,321 Some lives... 819 00:51:02,321 --> 00:51:04,481 ..never really get started. 820 00:51:06,161 --> 00:51:09,481 They're just fucked... fucked up from the beginning. 821 00:51:10,801 --> 00:51:12,441 It just goes on and on. 822 00:51:19,321 --> 00:51:21,761 I never sang for you, did I, mate? 823 00:51:23,841 --> 00:51:25,201 I wish I had. 824 00:51:25,321 --> 00:51:28,121 Well, come on, mate - fucking sing now! 825 00:51:28,241 --> 00:51:30,361 Sing your... sing your little heart out. 826 00:51:30,481 --> 00:51:34,361 Come on. And then will you get down off the railing? 827 00:51:39,241 --> 00:51:43,121 ♪ O, dolci baci 828 00:51:43,241 --> 00:51:48,201 ♪ O, languide carezze 829 00:51:48,321 --> 00:51:52,361 ♪ Mentr'io fremente 830 00:51:52,481 --> 00:52:02,480 ♪ Le belle forme disciogliea dai veli. ♪ 831 00:52:12,041 --> 00:52:13,401 Mate. 832 00:52:13,521 --> 00:52:16,481 Mate, that's fucking amazing! 833 00:52:18,001 --> 00:52:20,321 That is fucking amazing. 834 00:52:20,441 --> 00:52:22,681 Come on, keep singing, mate. 835 00:52:22,801 --> 00:52:24,321 Keep singing! 836 00:52:24,441 --> 00:52:27,361 Keep singing. It's fucking beautiful. Come on, mate. 837 00:52:27,481 --> 00:52:30,161 I told you I could do it. 838 00:52:38,681 --> 00:52:40,921 Fuck. 839 00:52:41,041 --> 00:52:42,921 Oh, fuck. 840 00:52:43,041 --> 00:52:45,441 Oh, fuck! 841 00:52:48,401 --> 00:52:49,761 Fuck. 842 00:52:54,041 --> 00:52:55,521 Oh, fuck! 843 00:52:58,801 --> 00:53:00,281 Oh, fuck. 844 00:53:14,601 --> 00:53:17,601 Captions by CSI Australia 66451

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