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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:15,013 RENO, THIS IS 41 FRANK 15 2 00:00:15,116 --> 00:00:16,981 WE'RE IN HOT PURSUIT OF A BROWN NISSAN STANZA, 3 00:00:17,083 --> 00:00:19,618 NEVADA LICENSE "W-U-V... 4 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:23,188 IT'S A VANITY PLATE, "WU... WUV... WUV MY... 5 00:00:23,290 --> 00:00:25,123 IT'S "W" "WU... WOOV-ME... 6 00:00:25,225 --> 00:00:27,526 "WOOVE ME... WUV ME... WUV MY... 7 00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:29,227 "WUV-MY-K9" 8 00:00:29,329 --> 00:00:30,896 LOVE MY CANINE, LOVE MY DOG. 9 00:00:30,998 --> 00:00:32,497 OH, HE LOVES HIS DOG. 10 00:00:32,599 --> 00:00:34,032 STOP THE CAR, STOP, STOP! 11 00:00:34,134 --> 00:00:35,567 [crash] 12 00:00:35,669 --> 00:00:38,270 Captioning made possible by COMEDY CENTRAL 13 00:00:38,372 --> 00:00:40,605 [siren blaring] 14 00:00:40,708 --> 00:00:44,075 OH, HO! OH, HO-HO! 15 00:00:44,178 --> 00:00:46,311 [police radio chatter] 16 00:00:49,650 --> 00:00:51,183 AGGGHHH! 17 00:00:51,285 --> 00:00:53,518 HERE YOU GO... LAL-LA, YEAH... 18 00:00:53,620 --> 00:00:55,487 [screaming] 19 00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:57,322 [man on radio] 2-3 Roger, roger... 20 00:00:57,424 --> 00:00:59,591 Shots fired! 21 00:00:59,693 --> 00:01:02,260 OH-HO-HO! 22 00:01:02,362 --> 00:01:04,730 [police radio chatter] 23 00:01:11,438 --> 00:01:13,571 [siren blaring] 24 00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:18,488 [Johnson] ONCE AGAIN I GOT NO SLEEP LAST NIGHT. 25 00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:20,612 [buzzer] 26 00:01:20,714 --> 00:01:23,448 OH, HERE WE GO. 27 00:01:23,550 --> 00:01:26,985 NICE... NICE! 28 00:01:29,123 --> 00:01:30,522 JUST MY BOYFRIEND, EVERYBODY. 29 00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:32,357 IT'S JUST STEED, THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. 30 00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:33,792 WHAT DID YOU DO NOW? 31 00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:36,094 THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING... 32 00:01:38,198 --> 00:01:39,198 CLEMMY... 33 00:01:39,299 --> 00:01:41,099 WHAT'D YOU DO NOW, WHAT'D YOU STEAL? 34 00:01:41,201 --> 00:01:42,745 I GOTTA TELL YOU SOMETHIN', I GOTTA COME CLEAN. 35 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,802 I COME HERE TO, UH, 36 00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:49,007 PROPOSE BLISSFUL MATRIMONY TO YOU, DOWN ON BENDED KNEE. 37 00:01:52,612 --> 00:01:55,713 CLEMMY, I KNOW WE BEEN THROUGH SOME HARD TIMES TOGETHER, UH... 38 00:01:55,816 --> 00:01:57,316 OH, MY GOD. 39 00:01:57,418 --> 00:01:59,184 MAYBE MORE TO COME, BUT, UH, 40 00:01:59,286 --> 00:02:01,352 I THINK NOW WE'VE MADE A REAL TURN. 41 00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:03,188 UH, ALMOST A COMPLETE U-TURN. 42 00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:05,523 UH, MAYBE NOT A COMPLETE U-TURN 43 00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:07,893 BUT, LIKE, A HARD... VERY HARD RIGHT TURN? 44 00:02:07,995 --> 00:02:09,561 [gasps] 45 00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:11,062 I WANT YOU TO MARRY ME, CLEMMY. 46 00:02:11,164 --> 00:02:13,665 I GOT IT AT J.C. PENNEY. 47 00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:15,534 [gasps] 48 00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:17,102 OH MY... 49 00:02:17,204 --> 00:02:19,671 THIS IS NOT HAPPENING. 50 00:02:19,773 --> 00:02:24,042 OH, MY GOD... YES, BY THE WAY, YES, YES. 51 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,077 [applause] 52 00:02:28,181 --> 00:02:30,148 [moaning] 53 00:02:35,355 --> 00:02:37,956 IS THERE LIKE AN EMPTY CELL WE CAN USE 54 00:02:38,058 --> 00:02:39,058 FOR A COUPLE OF... 55 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:40,058 NO. 56 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,026 IS THERE? JUST FOR A COUPLE MINUTES. 57 00:02:44,130 --> 00:02:45,930 TAKE IT OUTSIDE. 58 00:02:46,032 --> 00:02:49,801 WHEN I MET HIM, FIRST WEEK... THIS IS A TRUE STORY... 59 00:02:49,903 --> 00:02:53,505 FIRST WEEK, I GOT "STEED" TATTOOED ACROSS MY BACK. 60 00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:55,974 BUT THEN HE PISSED ME OFF THE NEXT WEEK 61 00:02:56,076 --> 00:02:57,356 AND I HAD TO CHANGE IT. 62 00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:59,344 AND SO I JUST PUT... 63 00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:02,947 I KINDA HAD THEM DO AN "X" THROUGH THE "D". 64 00:03:03,050 --> 00:03:05,049 AND IT SAYS "STEELY DAN". 65 00:03:06,453 --> 00:03:08,419 ARE WE READY TO GET MARRIED? 66 00:03:08,521 --> 00:03:10,288 WELL, I THINK... 67 00:03:10,390 --> 00:03:12,557 YOU KNOW, WAS I READY TO COME TO WORK TODAY? 68 00:03:12,659 --> 00:03:15,294 THE THING ABOUT CLEMMY MARRYING STEED IS THIS: 69 00:03:15,396 --> 00:03:17,628 PEOPLE CAN DO WHATEVER THEY WANNA DO. 70 00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:19,965 YOU KNOW, WE DON'T LIVE IN COMMUNIST CHINA. 71 00:03:20,067 --> 00:03:21,700 YOU KNOW? 72 00:03:21,802 --> 00:03:23,234 I'M NOT GONNA TELL HER, 73 00:03:23,336 --> 00:03:27,138 "HEY, THIS IS A BAD GUY WITH A RAP SHEET." 74 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:30,042 "THIS IS A GUY WHO'S, YOU KNOW, 75 00:03:30,144 --> 00:03:34,512 AN ATTEMPTED ARSONIST, A REPEAT B & E." 76 00:03:34,614 --> 00:03:36,514 YOU KNOW, IS THAT MY PLACE TO SAY, 77 00:03:36,616 --> 00:03:40,285 "HEY, THIS GUY WAS WANTED ON "STATCH" 78 00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:41,587 A COUPLE YEARS BACK?" 79 00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:44,422 "HEY, THIS GUY, Y'KNOW, SHOT HIS COUSIN 80 00:03:44,524 --> 00:03:46,558 Y'KNOW, BACK IN '81?" 81 00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:48,560 NO, LISTEN, PEOPLE CAN DO WHATEVER THEY WANT 82 00:03:48,662 --> 00:03:49,895 THIS ISN'T COMMUNIST CHINA. 83 00:03:53,533 --> 00:03:54,932 SHERIFF'S DEPARTMENT. 84 00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:56,268 SHERIFF'S DEPARTMENT, SIR. 85 00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:57,869 WHO'S IS IT? 86 00:03:57,971 --> 00:03:59,771 SHERIFF'S DEPARTMENT! PARTMENT! 87 00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:01,273 HI, CAN I HELP YOU? 88 00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:02,641 YEAH, YOU CAN HELP US. 89 00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:04,187 UH, LOOK, WE'RE SHOOTING A MOVIE RIGHT NOW. 90 00:04:04,211 --> 00:04:05,571 THIS IS REALLY NOT THE BEST TIME. 91 00:04:05,612 --> 00:04:07,557 WE'RE GONNA WRAP, PROBABLY, IN ABOUT 10, 15 MINUTES 92 00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:09,059 IF YOU GUYS WANNA GRAB A SODA OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT... 93 00:04:09,083 --> 00:04:10,582 SIR, WE'VE BEEN GETTING SOME NOISE, 94 00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:14,052 UH, COMPLAINTS FROM SUITE #4, HERE. 95 00:04:14,154 --> 00:04:15,520 YEAH, YOU HAVE BEEN, 96 00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:17,734 BECAUSE THERE HAVE BEEN A LOT OF PEOPLE KNOCKING ON MY DOOR 97 00:04:17,758 --> 00:04:20,292 AND WE ARE SHOOTING... WE'RE SHOOTING VéRITé, 98 00:04:20,394 --> 00:04:21,738 I'M NOT SURE IF YOU'RE FAMILIAR WITH THAT TERM 99 00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:22,994 BUT THAT MEANS REAL. 100 00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:24,306 AND YOU KNOW WHAT'S NOT REAL? 101 00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:26,564 IS A COUPLE OF KNUCKLEHEADS F... WITH MY MOVIE. 102 00:04:26,666 --> 00:04:28,633 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT'S REAL, SIR? 103 00:04:28,735 --> 00:04:30,279 IS WE'RE GONNA COME INSIDE 'CAUSE YOUR CHECKOUT TIME IS 12 104 00:04:30,303 --> 00:04:31,669 AND IT'S NOW 8 IN THE P.M. OKAY? 105 00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:33,705 SO, UH, THAT'S REAL NOW, WE'RE GONNA COME IN. 106 00:04:33,807 --> 00:04:35,340 UH, OKAY, FINE. 107 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:36,574 CUT! 108 00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,221 UH, SOME PEOPLE FROM THE POLICE DEPARTMENT 109 00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:39,856 WOULD LIKE TO SEE WHAT A REAL MOVIE IS ALL ABOUT. 110 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:41,212 THIS IS ART, ALL RIGHT? 111 00:04:41,314 --> 00:04:43,581 DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHERE I LIVE? 112 00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:44,916 I LIVE IN AMERICA! 113 00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:47,285 AND IN AMERICA, YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANT 114 00:04:47,387 --> 00:04:50,588 AND THE NAZIS CAN'T COME INSIDE AND F... WITH YOUR FILM. 115 00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:51,823 DON'T YOU SLAP... 116 00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:53,558 GREASED PIG! 117 00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:55,394 IT'S LOVE OIL! 118 00:04:55,496 --> 00:04:58,096 SON OF A BITCH! 119 00:04:58,198 --> 00:05:01,732 ♪ OH, SAY CAN YOU SEE... 120 00:05:01,835 --> 00:05:03,135 DON'T YOU SING THE ANTHEM! 121 00:05:03,236 --> 00:05:05,503 ♪ BY THE DAWN'S EARLY LIGHT... 122 00:05:05,605 --> 00:05:07,371 DON'T YOU SING THE ANTHEM, SIR! 123 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:08,607 ♪ WHAT'S SO PROUD... 124 00:05:08,709 --> 00:05:11,109 NO, DON'T YOU SING THE ANTHEM! 125 00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:12,289 DAMN, THIS COWBOY'S LIKE A... 126 00:05:12,313 --> 00:05:14,413 YEAH, SAY IT, SAY IT! 127 00:05:14,514 --> 00:05:15,814 SAY IT! 128 00:05:15,916 --> 00:05:17,449 NO, I'M FAT. 129 00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:18,983 I'M A FAT F... 130 00:05:19,085 --> 00:05:21,086 NO, YOU'RE NOT FAT. NO. 131 00:05:21,188 --> 00:05:22,253 NO, I'M NOT? 132 00:05:22,355 --> 00:05:23,654 NO, YOU'RE NOT FAT. 133 00:05:23,756 --> 00:05:25,190 I'M NOT FAT, REALLY? 134 00:05:25,292 --> 00:05:26,758 LOOK AT ME, ARE YOU BLIND?! 135 00:05:26,860 --> 00:05:28,526 I'M AS BIG AS A HOUSE! 136 00:05:28,628 --> 00:05:30,428 [groaning] 137 00:05:30,531 --> 00:05:31,963 OKAY, I'LL RENT THE ROOM. 138 00:05:32,065 --> 00:05:33,631 I'LL RENT THE ROOM FOR ANOTHER DAY... 139 00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:35,032 NO. OKAY? 140 00:05:35,134 --> 00:05:37,035 WE'RE NOT NEGOTIATING ANYMORE, SIR. 141 00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:39,838 OOP... NO, NO, HO! 142 00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:42,640 [growling] 143 00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:47,312 SO LONG, EVERYBODY BACK TO ONE! 144 00:05:48,715 --> 00:05:50,949 YEAH, RENO 11, CHARLIE 51. 145 00:05:51,051 --> 00:05:54,519 SEND THE FIRE DEPARTMENT OVER TO THE DESERT SANDS... 146 00:05:54,621 --> 00:05:57,021 [whistles] 147 00:05:57,123 --> 00:05:58,256 HE'S GOT YOUR STICK. 148 00:05:58,358 --> 00:05:59,368 [bleep] YOU, [bleep] YOU TWO TIMES... 149 00:05:59,392 --> 00:06:02,060 WHAT, WHAT? 150 00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:03,962 OH, YOU WANT THIS... OOH. 151 00:06:04,064 --> 00:06:05,864 OH, [bleep]! 152 00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:08,599 GET OFF! 153 00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:18,810 CLEMMY AND I MET AT A G-E-D CLASS. 154 00:06:18,912 --> 00:06:22,447 IT'S GRADUATE EQUIVALENT DEGREE DIPLOMA. 155 00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:24,215 AND HE PASSED ME A NOTE. 156 00:06:24,318 --> 00:06:28,353 GRADUATE EQUIVALENCY DEGREE, YOU GOT IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME. 157 00:06:28,455 --> 00:06:29,754 DEGREE... 158 00:06:29,856 --> 00:06:31,189 UH, I PASSED HER A NOTE... 159 00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:33,235 PASSED ME A NOTE, IT SAID, "I THINK YOU'RE HOT." 160 00:06:33,259 --> 00:06:35,126 AND I PASSED HIM A NOTE AND I SAID, 161 00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:36,605 "I DON'T NEED YOU TO TELL ME THAT." 162 00:06:36,629 --> 00:06:39,464 I AM PLANNING A BACHELORETTE PARTY FOR YOU. 163 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:42,934 STRIPPERS... ALL RIGHT. 164 00:06:43,036 --> 00:06:46,304 YOU HAVE A PREFERENCE? BLACK, WHITE? 165 00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,805 I LIKE 'EM ALL. 166 00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:50,108 I LIKE BLACK, I LIKE WHITE... 167 00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:51,509 I LIKE BLACK. 168 00:06:51,611 --> 00:06:53,511 JUST DON'T GET ME ANY PACIFIC ISLANDERS. 169 00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:57,048 I DON'T GET IT, I DON'T GET THAT. 170 00:06:57,150 --> 00:06:58,316 OKAY, HI, GANG. 171 00:06:58,418 --> 00:06:59,863 UH, MY NAME IS LIEUTENANT JIM DANGLE 172 00:06:59,887 --> 00:07:02,053 AND THIS IS MY ASSOCIATE, DEPUTY TRAVIS JUNIOR. 173 00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:03,955 WE'RE FROM THE RENO SHERIFF'S DEPARTMENT. 174 00:07:04,057 --> 00:07:06,991 AND TODAY WE'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT A SCARY AND DEADLY 175 00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:10,194 AND DANGEROUS DRUG THAT'S OUT ON THE STREETS. 176 00:07:10,297 --> 00:07:12,831 IT'S A KILLER, IT'S A PLAGUE THAT'S SWEEPING THE NATION 177 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:15,066 AND IT'S CALLED "CRYSTAL METHAMPHETAMINE". 178 00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:17,902 CRYSTAL METHAMPHETAMINE IS A TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE DRUG 179 00:07:18,004 --> 00:07:20,305 AND IT DOES A LOT OF TERRIBLE THINGS TO YA... 180 00:07:20,407 --> 00:07:21,673 [strums guitar] 181 00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,185 AND WE'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT SOME OF THOSE 182 00:07:23,209 --> 00:07:25,569 TERRIBLE THINGS IT DOES TO YOU BUT IN A KIND OF A FUN WAY. 183 00:07:25,645 --> 00:07:27,846 SO FOLLOW ALONG, AND AS SOON AS YOU KNOW THE WORDS 184 00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:29,614 SING ALONG RIGHT WITH ME. 185 00:07:34,053 --> 00:07:38,756 ♪ YOU CAN MONKEY WITH A GIBBON YOU CAN FIDDLE WITH A BOW ♪ 186 00:07:38,859 --> 00:07:41,358 ♪ BUT BEFORE YOU SNORT THAT CRYSTAL METH ♪ 187 00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:45,129 ♪ THERE'S SOME THINGS THAT YOU SHOULD KNOW ♪ 188 00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:47,599 ♪ METH IS MADE FROM ANTIHISTAMINES ♪ 189 00:07:47,701 --> 00:07:50,635 ♪ IN BASEMENT LABS IT'S COOKED ♪ 190 00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:52,870 ♪ AND POSSESSION IS A FELONY ♪ 191 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:56,474 ♪ WHICH MEANS THAT YOU'LL GET BOOKED ♪ 192 00:07:56,576 --> 00:07:58,242 ♪ WITH A SNORT ♪ 193 00:07:58,344 --> 00:08:02,013 ♪ IT ZIPS RIGHT UP YOUR NOSE AND EATS AWAY YOUR BRAIN ♪ 194 00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:04,516 ♪ IT KILLS YOUR SENSE OF GOOD AND EVIL ♪ 195 00:08:04,618 --> 00:08:07,018 ♪ AND IT MAKES YOU GO INSANE ♪ 196 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,653 HERE WE GO... 197 00:08:08,755 --> 00:08:10,956 [together] ♪ SO DON'T METH WITH METH, BETH ♪ 198 00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:13,391 ♪ DON'T METH WITH METH, SETH ♪ 199 00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:16,528 ♪ DON'T METH WITH METH... GWYNETH ♪ 200 00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:20,264 ♪ DON'T METH WITH CRYSTAL METH ♪ 201 00:08:20,366 --> 00:08:21,666 ANY QUESTIONS? 202 00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:26,904 WE GOT ANOTHER, UH, 45 MINUTES TO KILL. 203 00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:30,441 UH, ANY REQUESTS? 204 00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:33,210 ANYBODY? 205 00:08:33,312 --> 00:08:36,848 I KNOW SOME RUSH AND I KNOW A LOT OF FLOYD. 206 00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:42,220 HELLO. 207 00:08:42,322 --> 00:08:43,721 HOW YOU DOIN', TODAY, MA'AM? 208 00:08:43,823 --> 00:08:45,434 HI, I'M TERRIFIC, HOW ARE YOU GUYS DOIN'? 209 00:08:45,458 --> 00:08:47,091 WE'RE DOIN' GOOD. JUST GREAT. 210 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:48,960 SORRY FOR THE HOLDUP, GUYS. 211 00:08:49,062 --> 00:08:50,261 IT'S ALL RIGHT. 212 00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:51,829 I KNEW I HELD YOU UP. 213 00:08:51,931 --> 00:08:53,532 THAT'S PROBABLY A CRIME, ISN'T IT? 214 00:08:53,634 --> 00:08:55,866 NO, NO PROBLEM BUT COULD YOU HURRY IT UP? 215 00:08:55,968 --> 00:08:57,601 'CAUSE WE GOT A LOT OF CRIME TO... 216 00:08:57,703 --> 00:08:58,983 CAN YOU BELIEVE, $9 FOR TACOS? 217 00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,792 I MEAN, THAT'S HIGHWAY ROBBERY, ISN'T IT? 218 00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:02,674 NO, IT'S NOT BAD, ACTUALLY. 219 00:09:02,776 --> 00:09:04,342 HIGHWAY ROBBERY? 220 00:09:04,444 --> 00:09:05,643 IT'S A FAIR PRICE, ACTUALLY. 221 00:09:05,745 --> 00:09:07,078 HERE YOU GO, GUYS. 222 00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:08,413 OKAY, GOT IT... OHH... 223 00:09:08,515 --> 00:09:10,315 GOT IT? YEAH. 224 00:09:10,417 --> 00:09:12,783 HOPE IT'S NOT A CRIME TO MAKE YOU WAIT. 225 00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:14,719 NOT AT ALL, MA'AM, YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY. 226 00:09:14,821 --> 00:09:16,587 DO I HAVE TACO IN MY TEETH, HUH? 227 00:09:16,689 --> 00:09:19,357 NO, I DON'T THINK SO. 228 00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,159 BYE-BYE. 229 00:09:23,629 --> 00:09:25,196 KIND OF JITTERY, HUH? 230 00:09:25,298 --> 00:09:26,698 I'VE GOT A NOTE HERE. 231 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:28,566 "OFFICER, THERE ARE TWO ARMED MEN INSIDE." 232 00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:30,802 I HOPE THERE'S TWO-ARMED MEN BACK THERE 233 00:09:30,903 --> 00:09:33,037 A ONE-ARMED GUY'S NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO MAKE A TACO. 234 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,442 THIS HERE, ACTUALLY, IS MY PLOT. 235 00:09:38,544 --> 00:09:42,146 UM, OBVIOUSLY, THERE'S NOBODY IN IT YET 236 00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:45,817 BUT, GOD WILLING, THERE WILL BE. 237 00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:47,419 HI, MOM. 238 00:09:47,521 --> 00:09:52,524 MY MOM STARTED COLLECTING BEANIE BABIES... 239 00:09:52,626 --> 00:09:55,493 ABOUT FOUR YEARS AFTER SHE DIED. 240 00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:57,695 I USED TO LEAVE 'EM OUT HERE. 241 00:09:57,797 --> 00:10:00,699 IN FACT, I HAD A WHOLE COLLECTION FOR HER. 242 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:04,002 SHE HAD A GREAT PRINCESS DIANA BEAR, 243 00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:05,770 THOSE ARE A FORTUNE. 244 00:10:05,872 --> 00:10:07,639 I HAD A HARD TIME GETTING HER THAT ONE, 245 00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:09,907 SHE WAS REALLY EXCITED WHEN I DID FINALLY GET IT. 246 00:10:10,009 --> 00:10:15,046 UM, AND I LEFT HIM OUT HERE YOU KNOW, THINKING, 247 00:10:15,148 --> 00:10:19,084 THIS IS A SACRED PLACE AND UH... 248 00:10:19,186 --> 00:10:21,686 SOME NIGGER KID TOOK HIM, I THINK. 249 00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,654 I HAVE REAL DARK SKIN. 250 00:10:23,757 --> 00:10:29,093 MY MOM WAS REAL LIGHT SKINNED, SHE WAS AN IRISH GIRL. 251 00:10:29,195 --> 00:10:31,596 I HAVE REAL DARK SKIN 'CAUSE I WAS, APPARENTLY, 252 00:10:31,698 --> 00:10:33,064 SO THEY SAY, I WAS RAPED. 253 00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:35,166 UM, MY MOTHER WAS RAPED BY AN AMERICAN INDIAN. 254 00:10:35,268 --> 00:10:37,402 SHE HAD GONE ON... 255 00:10:37,504 --> 00:10:41,572 IT WAS A... SOME SORT OF SOUVENIR HUNT 256 00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:44,542 IN, UH, MINNESOTA. 257 00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:48,880 WANDERED ONTO A RESERVATION AND BOOM, THEY RAPED HER. 258 00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:51,549 THEY'RE TALKIN' ABOUT PUTTIN' MORE, UH, 259 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,018 ASIAN PEOPLE IN HERE? 260 00:10:54,121 --> 00:11:00,524 AND, UH, I PUT UP A FLYER, UM, 261 00:11:00,627 --> 00:11:03,728 OF COURSE, WITHOUT MY NAME ON IT OR ANY INFORMATION, SAYING, 262 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,931 Y'KNOW, LET'S TRY AND KEEP... 263 00:11:07,033 --> 00:11:10,902 IN SO MANY WORDS, LET'S TRY AND KEEP THE ASIANS OUT. 264 00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:12,871 AND I HAVEN'T HEARD ANYTHING BACK 265 00:11:12,973 --> 00:11:14,272 BUT, THEN AGAIN, 266 00:11:14,374 --> 00:11:16,252 I DIDN'T PUT MY NAME OR ANY PHONE NUMBER ON IT, SO. 267 00:11:16,276 --> 00:11:18,443 I DON'T KNOW HOW I WOULD HEAR BACK. 268 00:11:18,545 --> 00:11:20,744 [Garcia] HEY, WAIT, THE HEAD, I GOTTA GET DOWN LOWER. 269 00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:23,414 THERE WE GO... MEDUSA, AND THEN I GO UP. 270 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,216 [laughs] 271 00:11:25,318 --> 00:11:27,919 LOOK AT THAT, PRETTY DAMN COOL. 272 00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:28,920 OH, A MAN OF MYSTERY! 273 00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:31,922 OH, GO AWAY, YOU EVIL GREEK GUY! 274 00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:35,693 YOU HAVE BEEN CURS-ED BY THE EVIL MEDUSA. 275 00:11:35,795 --> 00:11:37,661 YOU HAVE BEEN CURS-ED! 276 00:11:37,763 --> 00:11:39,883 HEY, HOW WOULD IT BE IF I HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM? 277 00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:50,975 [all] WHOO! 278 00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:55,546 I HAVE A SPEECH THAT I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE. 279 00:11:55,649 --> 00:11:57,015 GO GIRL! 280 00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:58,394 WELL, TRUTH BE TOLD, 281 00:11:58,418 --> 00:11:59,795 THIS IS THE FIRST PARTY I'VE EVER BEEN INVITED TO. 282 00:11:59,819 --> 00:12:01,319 AWW... 283 00:12:01,420 --> 00:12:03,455 I'M SORRY FOR... 284 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:04,889 SHHH. 285 00:12:04,991 --> 00:12:07,525 I DON'T KNOW STEED VERY WELL. 286 00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:11,495 BUT, MY MOTTO IS, 287 00:12:11,597 --> 00:12:13,397 "DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER." 288 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,633 OKAY, GIRL! 289 00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,869 WHOO! 290 00:12:17,971 --> 00:12:19,691 I WAS WAITING TO TONIGHT TO TELL YOU THIS, 291 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,940 I DECIDED THIS LIKE A WEEK AGO, THAT, UM... 292 00:12:22,042 --> 00:12:25,176 ONCE YOU GUYS DECIDE YOU WANNA HAVE CHILDREN, 293 00:12:25,278 --> 00:12:27,644 I WILL SLEEP WITH STEED, 294 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:30,915 FOR AS MANY TIMES AS IT TAKES TO GET ME PREGNANT 295 00:12:31,017 --> 00:12:34,585 UNTIL I GIVE BIRTH AND GIVE YOU THAT BABY. 296 00:12:34,688 --> 00:12:36,965 'CAUSE YOU DESERVE TO BE A MOM, YOU REALLY FRICKIN' DO... 297 00:12:36,989 --> 00:12:39,390 I'M GONNA TELL YOU RIGHT NOW, WHITE PEOPLE ARE CRAZY. 298 00:12:39,492 --> 00:12:41,726 CRAZY AND NASTY. 299 00:12:41,828 --> 00:12:45,496 I'M REALLY EXCITED THAT YOU GUYS ARE HERE TODAY. 300 00:12:45,599 --> 00:12:49,734 AND THAT YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE THERE'S A COMPETITION. 301 00:12:49,836 --> 00:12:51,669 OH, NO, NOT AT ALL... 302 00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:53,237 IT'S NOT ABOUT A COMPETITION 303 00:12:53,340 --> 00:12:55,406 BECAUSE WE KNOW WHO THE WINNER IS IN THIS ROOM. 304 00:12:55,509 --> 00:12:57,374 AND IT'S THE ONE WHO'S GETTING MARRIED. 305 00:13:01,514 --> 00:13:05,116 SON OF A BITCH, THIS GUY IS DRUNK AS A SKUNK 306 00:13:05,218 --> 00:13:06,583 OR HIGH AS A KITE. 307 00:13:06,685 --> 00:13:08,520 UH, FRIDAY NIGHT IN RENO. 308 00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:10,387 PUT YOUR HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM! 309 00:13:10,489 --> 00:13:12,189 HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM! 310 00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:14,358 PASSENGER, SIT DOWN. 311 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:16,494 GOD DAMN IT, STEED. 312 00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:18,863 STEED, WHAT THE F... ARE YOU DOING, MAN? 313 00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:19,965 DANGLE. 314 00:13:20,032 --> 00:13:21,310 YOU BEEN WEAVING ALL OVER THE ROAD 315 00:13:21,334 --> 00:13:22,767 YOU'RE DRIVING LIKE A CRAZY PERSON. 316 00:13:22,869 --> 00:13:24,614 STEED, STEP OUT OF THE VEHICLE, WILL YOU, PLEASE? 317 00:13:24,638 --> 00:13:26,504 STEP ON OUT, STEED, GOD DAMN IT. 318 00:13:26,606 --> 00:13:28,439 WHAT ARE YOU DOING TONIGHT, STEED? 319 00:13:28,542 --> 00:13:32,210 UH, PEYOTE... MUSHROOMS... 320 00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:33,455 RIGHT, RIGHT. 321 00:13:33,479 --> 00:13:35,346 SOME CRYSTAL METH... 322 00:13:35,448 --> 00:13:36,513 YOU DID WHAT? 323 00:13:36,615 --> 00:13:37,849 ABOUT 28 BEERS? 324 00:13:37,951 --> 00:13:39,484 DON'T, DON'T... 325 00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:40,885 OKAY, YOU GOT SOME MARIJUANA. 326 00:13:40,987 --> 00:13:42,686 THAT IS SOME GOOD [bleep]. 327 00:13:42,789 --> 00:13:45,722 NOW, YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T... WHAT THE [bleep], STEED? 328 00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:49,526 STEED, THAT'S LIKE A POUND OF MARIJUANA. 329 00:13:49,628 --> 00:13:51,595 YOU GOT A .38... 330 00:13:51,697 --> 00:13:53,031 NO, NO, STEED... 331 00:13:53,133 --> 00:13:54,566 STOP, STOP... STOP, STOP... 332 00:13:54,668 --> 00:13:56,634 YOU'RE OVERINCRIMINATING YOURSELF. 333 00:13:56,736 --> 00:13:57,846 WE DON'T HAVE TO SEE ALL THIS, 334 00:13:57,870 --> 00:13:59,270 WE WEREN'T EVEN GONNA PAT YA DOWN. 335 00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:00,738 GOD DAMN IT, STEED. 336 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:02,417 WE'RE GONNA PRETEND WE DIDN'T SEE THAT. 337 00:14:02,441 --> 00:14:03,641 NO, HAND OUT OF YOUR POCKET! 338 00:14:03,677 --> 00:14:05,242 HAND OUT OF YOUR POCKET! 339 00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:06,777 GOD DAMN IT, STEED! 340 00:14:06,879 --> 00:14:08,612 THIS IS, UH... 341 00:14:08,714 --> 00:14:09,891 WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'? 342 00:14:09,915 --> 00:14:11,815 THAT'S BROWN HEROIN, THIS IS, UH... 343 00:14:11,918 --> 00:14:13,784 WE WEREN'T EVEN GONNA SEARCH YA. 344 00:14:13,886 --> 00:14:16,064 I DIDN'T EVEN WANNA KNOW WHAT WAS IN YOUR POCKET, MAN. 345 00:14:16,088 --> 00:14:17,421 BE SURE AND KEEP THE CAP ON THAT. 346 00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:19,023 YOU'RE GETTIN' MARRIED... 347 00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:20,625 YOU'RE GETTIN' MARRIED TOMORROW. 348 00:14:20,727 --> 00:14:22,204 YOU JUST DON'T KNOW WHEN TO QUIT, DO YOU? 349 00:14:22,228 --> 00:14:24,095 I REALIZE, I DON'T KNOW WHEN TO... 350 00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:25,363 I'VE GOT SOME PROBLEMS. 351 00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:27,765 UH, GOING TO THE A.A. TWELVE STEP? 352 00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:29,011 YOU AIN'T DOIN' TOO GOOD. 353 00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:30,868 WHICH STEP IS THE FOUR POUNDS OF MARIJUANA? 354 00:14:30,970 --> 00:14:32,136 WHICH STEP IS THAT? 355 00:14:32,239 --> 00:14:34,005 STEED, JUST COOL OFF. 356 00:14:34,106 --> 00:14:35,440 FREEZE. 357 00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:36,874 TRAVIS? NO, WE GOT HIM... 358 00:14:36,976 --> 00:14:38,743 TRAVIS, COME HERE. 359 00:14:38,845 --> 00:14:40,144 DON'T GO NOWHERE. 360 00:14:40,246 --> 00:14:42,914 I, FOR ONE, AM NOT GONNA BE THE GUY 361 00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:45,149 WHO TAKES CLEMMY'S HUSBAND-TO-BE IN 362 00:14:45,252 --> 00:14:46,584 THE NIGHT BEFORE HIS NUPTIALS. 363 00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:47,751 I'M NOT GONNA DO IT. 364 00:14:47,854 --> 00:14:49,264 I'M NOT GONNA DO THIS TO THAT WOMAN. 365 00:14:49,288 --> 00:14:50,899 WE'LL DUMP THE STUFF AND LET HIM GO, OKAY? 366 00:14:50,923 --> 00:14:52,457 WE'LL LET HIM GO? 367 00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:53,669 WE'RE NOT GONNA LET HIM DRIVE 368 00:14:53,693 --> 00:14:55,337 BUT WE'RE GONNA DUMP THE STUFF AND LET HIM GO. 369 00:14:55,361 --> 00:14:57,194 SHE AIN'T GONNA DO NO BETTER, YOU'RE RIGHT. 370 00:14:57,296 --> 00:14:58,707 SHE AIN'T GONNA DO NO BETTER THAN STEED. 371 00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,451 HE'S NO PRIZE, BUT NEITHER IS SHE, COME ON. 372 00:15:02,501 --> 00:15:05,169 OKAY, STEED, WE TALKED IT OVER AND I JUST WANNA... 373 00:15:05,272 --> 00:15:06,337 [bottle shatters] 374 00:15:06,439 --> 00:15:07,504 OHH! 375 00:15:07,606 --> 00:15:09,173 GOD DAMN IT, ARE YOU... STEED! 376 00:15:09,275 --> 00:15:10,508 AHH! 377 00:15:12,679 --> 00:15:14,479 OH, MY GOD, REMEMBER WHAT WE... 378 00:15:14,581 --> 00:15:16,180 WHAT WE DID WITH THIS? 379 00:15:16,282 --> 00:15:20,484 OH, MY GOSH, I TOTALLY REMEMBER. 380 00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,553 DON'T GIVE ME ATTITUDE, I AM THE MAID OF HONOR... 381 00:15:22,655 --> 00:15:24,895 [Williams] YEAH, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE BUT THIS IS MY HOUSE 382 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:27,358 I'M GIVIN' THE PARTY! 383 00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:30,962 ANYBODY WANT A... ANYBODY WANT A HOT CUP OF WANG? 384 00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:32,830 [banging on door] 385 00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,565 SOMEBODY AT THE DOOR! 386 00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:36,233 HOW I LOOK? 387 00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:40,571 [all hollering] 388 00:15:40,673 --> 00:15:42,706 IT'S THE POLICE! 389 00:15:42,808 --> 00:15:47,011 UM, UH, IS IT A PROBLEM, OFFICER? 390 00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:49,280 YES, WE HAVE A NOISE COMPLAINT. 391 00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:52,016 WELL, WAS WE MAKIN' TOO MUCH NOISE? 392 00:15:52,118 --> 00:15:54,351 I DON'T THINK YOU WAS MAKIN' ENOUGH NOISE! 393 00:15:54,453 --> 00:15:56,854 [all hollering] 394 00:15:56,956 --> 00:16:00,057 YEAH, BABY! I'M THE BRIDE! 395 00:16:00,159 --> 00:16:02,059 LADIES, WE ARE THE MEN OF MANTASIA. 396 00:16:02,161 --> 00:16:04,696 YOU READY FOR SOME CHOCOLATE CARAMEL STICKS? 397 00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:06,930 YOU READY FOR SOME MAN MEAT? 398 00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:12,070 HOLD ON, HOLD ON... 399 00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:13,771 JONES? 400 00:16:15,374 --> 00:16:16,907 HI, TRUDY. 401 00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:18,509 WHAT YOU DOIN' HERE? 402 00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:20,210 MOONLIGHTING. 403 00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:24,749 LISTEN, HEY, I DON'T NEED YOU LOOKIN' AT ME THAT WAY, OKAY? 404 00:16:24,851 --> 00:16:27,251 IF YOU WANT ANOTHER OFFICER, FINE, I'LL GO, 405 00:16:27,353 --> 00:16:29,453 I NEED THE MONEY, OKAY? 406 00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:30,922 NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 407 00:16:31,024 --> 00:16:36,093 JONESY, OFFICER, DARLING... I PAID FOR THREE STRIPPERS, 408 00:16:36,195 --> 00:16:38,329 I'M GONNA HAVE THREE STRIPPERS! 409 00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:40,231 LET'S GET THE PARTY STARTED! 410 00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:42,466 LET'S GET THE PARTY STARTED! 411 00:16:45,872 --> 00:16:49,340 GO JONESY, GO JONESY, GO JONESY... 412 00:16:49,442 --> 00:16:50,908 ON THE RIGHT, ON THE RIGHT! 413 00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:53,877 WHOOO! 414 00:17:01,153 --> 00:17:04,455 WHOO, WHOO, WHOA! 415 00:17:04,557 --> 00:17:06,356 DO BABIES NEED THEIR BOTTLE? 416 00:17:06,458 --> 00:17:08,259 [all] OOH! 417 00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:10,360 OH! OH, YEAH. 418 00:17:12,097 --> 00:17:14,331 [all hollering] 419 00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:24,341 [banjo playing] 420 00:17:27,246 --> 00:17:35,019 ♪ AVE MARIA ♪ 421 00:17:35,121 --> 00:17:40,992 ♪ GRATIA PLENA ♪ 422 00:17:41,094 --> 00:17:49,094 ♪ MARIA GRATIA PLENA AVE, AVE DOMINUS ♪ 423 00:17:49,602 --> 00:17:54,439 ♪ DOMINUS TECUM ♪ 424 00:17:56,242 --> 00:17:57,802 JUST WANNA THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING OUT 425 00:17:57,877 --> 00:17:59,644 ON THIS EGREGIOUS OCCASION. 426 00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:01,946 I'M A STRAIGHT-SHOOTIN' COWBOY, YOU ALL KNOW THAT. 427 00:18:02,048 --> 00:18:03,414 I'VE PARTIED WITH MANY OF YOU, 428 00:18:03,516 --> 00:18:05,916 OFTENTIMES 'TIL FOUR A.M. SHOOTIN' DOWN SHOTS OF "JAGE". 429 00:18:06,018 --> 00:18:09,820 UH, CLEMMIE, LOVE OF MY LIFE. 430 00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:13,257 ALWAYS WANNA BE IN A SEMI-MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. 431 00:18:13,359 --> 00:18:14,892 UH, LOOKIN' FORWARD TO IT. 432 00:18:14,994 --> 00:18:17,294 UH... 433 00:18:17,396 --> 00:18:18,995 TITS LOOKS GREAT. 434 00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:21,332 THAT'S ALL I GOT. 435 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:22,966 CLEMENTINE. 436 00:18:23,069 --> 00:18:25,670 [crying] 437 00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:34,411 I LOVE YOU, AND UM, 438 00:18:34,513 --> 00:18:38,081 WHEN ONE DYNAMIC PERSON MEETS ANOTHER DYNAMIC PERSON 439 00:18:38,184 --> 00:18:40,451 IT'S LIKE A WHOLE LOT OF DYNAMITE. 440 00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:43,220 AND I PROMISE THAT, UM, 441 00:18:43,322 --> 00:18:47,324 I WILL STAY IN THIS MARRIAGE UNTIL WE BOTH AGREE 442 00:18:47,426 --> 00:18:49,560 THAT WE DON'T WANNA DO IT ANYMORE. 443 00:18:49,662 --> 00:18:52,563 I LOVE YOU. 444 00:18:55,535 --> 00:18:57,601 WITH THIS RING... 445 00:18:57,704 --> 00:19:00,070 I DON'T KNOW HOW IT ENDS. 446 00:19:00,172 --> 00:19:03,107 IF THERE BE ANY HERE, WHATSOEVER, 447 00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:06,343 WHO KNOWS OF A REASON THAT THIS MAN AND WOMAN 448 00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:08,479 SHOULD NOT BE JOINED IN HOLY MATRIMONY, 449 00:19:08,581 --> 00:19:12,183 SPEAK NOW, OR FOREVER HOLD YOUR PEACE. 450 00:19:20,793 --> 00:19:23,033 THEN, BY THE POWER VESTED IN ME BY THE STATE OF NEVADA, 451 00:19:23,129 --> 00:19:26,630 I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU HUSBAND AND WIFE. 452 00:19:26,732 --> 00:19:28,398 YOU MAY NOW... WELL, THERE YA GO. 453 00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,868 WHOO! ALL RIGHT! 454 00:19:39,078 --> 00:19:41,579 [cheering] 455 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,781 WE'RE MARRIED! 456 00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:45,783 [screaming] 457 00:19:55,761 --> 00:19:58,262 THEY AIN'T GONNA MAKE IT, MM-MM. 458 00:20:05,404 --> 00:20:06,504 CAN WE GO, OR WHAT? 459 00:20:06,606 --> 00:20:07,846 YEAH, LET'S GO. 460 00:20:13,979 --> 00:20:15,057 HEY, DON'T COME AT ME WITH THIS ATTITUDE, 461 00:20:15,081 --> 00:20:16,346 LIKE, "I'M GONNA JUDGE." 462 00:20:16,448 --> 00:20:17,960 WHAT I'M DOING HERE IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS 463 00:20:17,984 --> 00:20:19,450 BUT I GOT MY CAT, MR. PAWS 464 00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,030 AND I'M GONNA MAKE SWEET LOVE TO THIS YOUNG LADY 465 00:20:21,054 --> 00:20:22,865 AND MR. PAWS GONNA WATCH 'CAUSE THAT'S AN EXTENSION OF MYSELF. 466 00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,989 AND THAT'S LEGAL, BECAUSE THAT'S MY CHOICE! 467 00:20:26,826 --> 00:20:29,426 GIRL, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU, DID STEED DO THIS TO YOU? 468 00:20:29,528 --> 00:20:31,862 YES, HE DID, BUT YOU SHOULD SEE WHAT I DID TO HIM. 469 00:20:31,964 --> 00:20:34,531 HE'S IN THE HOSPITAL WITH HIS JAW WIRED SHUT, IT'S ALL GOOD. 470 00:20:34,633 --> 00:20:36,667 OH, MY GOD. 471 00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:38,802 ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? 472 00:20:38,904 --> 00:20:40,470 I'M FINE, I'M FINE. 473 00:20:40,573 --> 00:20:43,174 I MEAN, WE FORGOT TO GET A LICENSE 474 00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:45,643 SO WE WERE NEVER REALLY MARRIED, SO, IT'S FINE. 475 00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:48,946 CLEMMY'S BACK AND SHE'S SINGLE AND IT'S ALL GOOD. 476 00:20:52,719 --> 00:20:54,985 Captioning made possible by COMEDY CENTRAL 477 00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,988 Captioned by Soundwriters™ 478 00:21:00,859 --> 00:21:02,627 ADOLF HITLER WAS NOT GAY, OKAY? 479 00:21:02,728 --> 00:21:04,128 I HEARD THAT HE WAS. 480 00:21:04,230 --> 00:21:07,097 HE LOVED WAGNER AND HE WAS GAY. 481 00:21:07,199 --> 00:21:09,266 HE ALSO HAD ONE BALL, THEY SAY. 482 00:21:09,368 --> 00:21:10,667 AND, HE WAS JEWISH. 483 00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:11,968 YEAH, OH YEAH. 484 00:21:12,070 --> 00:21:15,806 AND HE HAD ONE BALL... I THINK. 485 00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:17,641 THAT MIGHT BE JUST FROM THE SONG. 486 00:21:17,743 --> 00:21:19,143 NO, HE REALLY HAD ONE BALL. 487 00:21:19,244 --> 00:21:21,589 NO, HE ONLY HAD ONE BALL, IT'S IN THE MUSEUM OF TOLERANCE NOW. 488 00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:22,853 NO, IT'S NOT. 489 00:21:22,882 --> 00:21:24,181 HITLER'S BALL? 490 00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:25,515 WHERE ELSE WOULD IT BE? 491 00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:27,362 THEY PUT HITLER'S BALL IN THE MUSEUM OF TOLERANCE? 492 00:21:27,386 --> 00:21:29,030 YOU GOTTA KNOW WHERE TO... YOU GOTTA ASK THE FELLA 493 00:21:29,054 --> 00:21:30,454 AND HE'LL LET YOU IN THE BACK ROOM. 34646

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