All language subtitles for JAG.S04E23.Yeah,.Baby.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-Panda_track3_[eng]

Man 1:
OKAY, HARM, IT'S PIZZA NIGHT

AND MY STOMACH IS GROWLING.

WHAT SAY WE TRAP THIS TIME?

Man 2:
TOMCAT 1-7-3

YOU'RE AT A MILE AND A QUARTER.
CALL THE BALL.

1-7-3 TOMCAT. CLARA.

THREE-POINT-SIX.

Man 3:
FAN LEFT, HARM.

1-7-3 TOMCAT.
BALL, THREE-POINT-FIVE.

Man 4:
ROGER, BALL.

Man 4:
YOU'RE A LITTLE LOW.

POWER, POWER, POWER!

[ airplane whirring ][ grunts ]

[ explosions ]

[ grunts ]

[ sighs ]

[ opening theme music playing ]

[ tranquil music playing ]

YOU'RE NOT TAKING THIS
PERSONALLY ARE YOU, MAJOR?

I MEAN, ALL'S FAIR IN LOVE,
WAR AND THE COURTROOM, RIGHT?

WRONG!

WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS?

NO, I DON'T.

LOOK, MAJOR...

I DON'T WANT THERE TO BE
ANY HARD FEELINGS BETWEEN US.

THERE IS NOTHING
BETWEEN US--

GOOD, BAD OR OTHERWISE.

AND IF YOU TRY TO STOP THIS DOOR
FROM CLOSING ONE MORE TIME,

I WILL DISLOCATE
YOUR SHOULDER.

BLIMEY, I LIKE
YOUR STYLE, MAJOR.

YOU MUST BE
A HELLCAT IN THE...

[ soft music playing ]

[ alarm clock ringing ]HMM?

[ tranquil music playing ]

[ exhales ]

[ chuckles ]

WELL, GOOD MORNING.
HEY.

WELL, THIS A SURPRISE.
I COULDN'T SLEEP

SO I THOUGHT I'D COME OVER
AND MAKE YOU BREAKFAST.

OH...
[ smooches ]

OH, YOU'RE SWEATY.
WELL, YOU KNOW,

THIS GIRLISH FIGURE DOESN'T
COME WITHOUT SACRIFICE.

UH-HUH...

YOU OUGHT TO COME RUNNING
WITH ME SOMETIME.

AH, NO, THANKS.

MEDICAL STUDIES PROVE WOMEN NEED
MORE BODY FAT THAN MEN.

OH, REALLY?
WHO SPONSORED THAT STUDY?

HOSTESS TWINKIES?

FUNNY. HOW WOULD YOU LIKE
TO TRY RUNNING

WITH A BROKEN KNEECAP?

OH, YOU'RE VICIOUS
WHEN YOU'RE ANGRY.

I'M GOING TO TAKE A SHOWER

BUT I'LL BE BACK.

YOU DO THAT.

[ shower rains ]

[ tranquil music playing ]

HARM?

[ pager beeping ]

Harriet: HEADS UP!

WIDE LOAD COMING THROUGH.
[ indistinct chatter ]

CLEAR THE DECK.

GOOD MORNING, LIEUTENANT.

GOOD MORNING, TINER.
HOW ARE YOU FEELING TODAY?

UGH! MY BLADDER'S BEING CRUSHED

I CAN PRACTICALLY HEAR
MY SKIN STRETCHING

AND I'M RETAINING
SO MUCH WATER

THAT MY BUTT IS SHIFTING
WITH THE TIDE.

WELL, AT LEAST
IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE, MA'AM.

AND IF I MAY BE CANDID...

WELL, THERE ARE SOME MEN
WHO FIND PREGNANT WOMEN VERY...

ATTRACTIVE.

WELL, THANK YOU, TINER.

I APPRECIATE THE COMPLIMENT.

BUT IF YOU REALLY WANT
TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER

THINK FOOT RUB.

AH.[ chuckles ]

HAVE YOU SEEN THE SAILOR
WHO DID THIS TO ME?

MA'AM?LIEUTENANT ROBERTS.

MY HUSBAND.

AH! NEVER MIND.

THANK YOU.

Jason: GOOD MORNING, SIR.

Harriet: BUD?

MR. ROBERTS.

LIEUTENANT.

BUD!

[ phone rings ]

SWEETIE, I MADE A LIST
FOR THE PHARMACY.

COULD YOU GO GET
THESE THINGS FOR ME?

SURE.
"PRENATAL VITAMINS..."

FOR A HEALTHY BABY.
"VITAMIN 'E' CREAM..."

FOR MY STRETCH MARKS.

"BREAST PUMP."

IN CASE I HAVE TO EXPRESS
SOME BREAST MILK.

EXCUSE ME.

WHAT?

YOU JUST GRIMACED.

NO, I DIDN'T.

YES, YOU DID.

I AM BASKING IN THE NATURAL GLOW
OF MOTHERHOOD

AND YOU'RE GROSSED OUT.

NO, I'M NOT, AND...

AND CAN WE TALK
ABOUT THIS AT HOME? LATER?

THERE'S NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT.

I AM PREGNANT
WITH YOUR BABY, BUD

AND FOR YOUR INFORMATION,
THERE ARE SOME MEN AROUND HERE

THAT FIND A WOMAN
IN MY STATE SEXY.

[ scoffs ] YEAH? NAME ONE.

[ ominous music playing ]

HOLD THE ELEVATOR, PLEASE.

THANKS, MAJOR.

READY TO GO AT IT?
[ jarring indication ]

EXCUSE ME?
IN COURT TODAY.

[ electric crackles ]
[ tense music playing ]

UH...

MORE CUTBACKS
IN MILITARY SPENDING?

[ soft music playing ]

DON'T EVEN
THINK ABOUT IT.

WHAT?

THINK ABOUT WHAT?

DID YOU TELL LIEUTENANT SIMS
THAT SHE WAS SEXY?

SIR?
IT'S A SIMPLE QUESTION,
TINER.

DID YOU TELL THE LIEUTENANT
THAT YOU WERE
SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO HER?

NO, SIR.

NO?

THE LIEUTENANT
WAS FEELING BLUE, SIR.

I WAS JUST TRYING
TO MAKE HER FEEL BETTER.

I DON'T RECALL THAT BEING PART
OF YOUR DUTIES, PETTY OFFICER.

GET YOUR OWN PREGNANT WIFE.

Albert: LIEUTENANT.

DO YOU HAVE A GOOD REASON

FOR BADGERING
PETTY OFFICER TINER?

NO, SIR.

THEN I SUGGEST
THAT YOU GET BACK TO WORK

AND GET YOUR OWN PETTY OFFICER.

YES, SIR.

THIS IS YOUR BRAIN.

THIS IS YOUR BRAIN
DURING FATHERHOOD.

ANY QUESTIONS?

NO, SIR.Albert: GOOD.

[ door slams ]

[ tranquil music playing ]

[ door knocks ]

"THE ROLE
OF THE MILITARY JUSTICE

"MUST EVOLVE ALONG WITH...
[ door knocks ]

WITH SOCIETY, IF... IF..."
[ door opens ]

Albert: YOU EVER HEARD
OF KNOCKING?

I DID, SIR.

WELL, OBVIOUSLY,
I DIDN'T HEAR YOU.

I'M SORRY.
SORRY. COME ON IN.

I'VE GOT TO...
MAKE A SPEECH

TO THE HOUSE NATIONAL SECURITY
SUBCOMMITTEE THIS AFTERNOON.

UH, CAN THIS WAIT?

WELL, SIR, I'VE BEEN PUTTING
THIS OFF FOR TWO DAYS ALREADY.

ADMIRAL, IF YOU WOULDN'T MIND.

SIR, I'D LIKE THE OPPORTUNITY
TO CHANGE MY DESIGNATOR.

I JOINED THE NAVY TO SERVE
AS A NAVAL AVIATOR

WHICH I WAS FORCED TO ABANDON
BECAUSE OF A MEDICAL PROBLEM

WHICH HAS SINCE BEEN CORRECTED.

SIR, I'VE ENJOYED
MY TIME HERE AT JAG

ESPECIALLY SERVING UNDER YOU,
ADMIRAL, BUT I...

I ALSO BELIEVE THAT I COULD BE
OF SERVICE TO THE NAVY

AND TO MY COUNTRY IF I RETURNED
TO ACTIVE FLIGHT STATUS.

NICE SPEECH.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU
BEEN PRACTICING?

ABOUT A WEEK, SIR.WANT TO ADDRESS CONGRESS?

NO, SIR. THANK YOU.

BUT YOU DO WANT
TO LEAVE JAG?

SIR, IT'S NOT SO MUCH
THAT I WANT TO LEAVE JAG AS...

IT'S... I WANT
THE OPPORTUNITY

TO RETURN TO A FIGHTER SQUAD.

ADMIRAL, I WAS FORCED
TO GIVE UP FLYING.

IT WAS NEVER MY DECISION

AND IF I DECIDE
TO STAY HERE AT JAG,

I WOULD LIKE IT
TO BE MY DECISION.

MM-HMM.

WELL, THIS SOUNDS STUPID

BUT, UM, HAVE YOU GIVEN THIS
A LOT OF THOUGHT, COMMANDER?

DAY AND NIGHT, SIR,
FOR QUITE SOME TIME.

IF YOU GO BACK
TO A SQUADRON, UH--

PROVIDING THAT YOU CAN PASS
THE FLIGHT PHYSICAL...

I CAN PASS
THE FLIGHT PHYSICAL.

YOU'LL BE GOING BACKWARDS.

HELL, YOU MIGHT BE TAKING ORDERS
FROM GUYS HALF YOUR AGE.

I DON'T THINK THERE ARE MANY
17-YEAR-OLD FIGHTER PILOTS, SIR.

NOT TOO MANY
35-YEAR-OLD JAG LAWYERS

FLYING THESE DAYS EITHER,
COMMANDER.

WELL, I'D LIKE THE OPPORTUNITY
TO BE THE FIRST, SIR.

WELL, I THINK WE SHOULD
DISCUSS THIS AT LENGTH.

ADMIRAL, I LOVE THE LAW

BUT ALL I'VE EVER REALLY WANTED
TO DO IS FLY.

SO DID ICARUS.

ICARUS NEVER FLEW AN F-14, SIR.

[ scoffs ]

AS COMMANDING OFFICER,
I SOMETIMES HAVE
TO MAKE DECISIONS

THAT I CONSIDER
THE BEST FOR MY PEOPLE.

OCCASIONALLY, THOSE DECISIONS

ARE IN OPPOSITION
TO THE INDIVIDUAL.

SIR, ARE YOU SAYING
THAT YOU ARE NOT GOING
TO APPROVE MY REQUEST?

YOU'LL NEED A LOT MORE
THAN MY APPROVAL
TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN.

BUT IT CAN'T HAPPEN
WITHOUT YOUR APPROVAL.

I HAVE A SPEECH TO GIVE
THIS AFTERNOON, COMMANDER.

I WILL GIVE YOU MY DECISION
IN DUE TIME. DISMISSED.

AYE, AYE, SIR.

[ melancholy music playing ]

THANK YOU, SIR.

[ door closes ]

[ sighs ]

[ dramatic music playing ]

[ Mackenzie chuckles ]
YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?

Man on phone:
SORRY, MA'AM.
[ sighs ]

THEY SAY IT COULD
TAKE UP TO 30 MINUTES

FOR A TECHNICIAN
TO GET HERE.

THEN WE'LL JUST
HAVE TO SPEND THIS TIME

GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER
A LITTLE BETTER.

[ chuckles ] LET'S NOT.

WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF,
MAJOR--

THAT YOU MIGHT FIND YOURSELF
LIKING ME?

LOOK, COMMANDER,
I LIKE YOU.

I THINK YOU'RE
A NICE ENOUGH GUY.

AND YOU'RE
A PRETTY GOOD LAWYER...

STOP. YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME.

I'M JUST NOT INTERESTED
IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU...

OR ANYONE ELSE RIGHT NOW.

AND IS THIS
A HARD AND FAST RULE

AGAINST DATING THOSE
WITHIN YOUR COMMAND

OR IS IT MORE
OF A GUIDELINE?

IT'S A COMMANDMENT.

I HAD A BOYFRIEND DIE
IN A CAR ACCIDENT...

MY... EX-HUSBAND
IS DEAD, AND, UH...

A LAWYER I WAS INVOLVED
WITH WAS MURDERED.

DO YOU SEE A PATTERN HERE?

YEAH, I DO.

NOT A DAMN AUSTRALIAN
IN THE LOT.

[ both laughing ]

[ chuckles ]

WH-WHY ME?

HONESTLY?YEAH.

YOU KIND OF REMIND ME
OF MY MOTHER.

YOUR MOTHER?

LET ME GIVE YOU
A LITTLE ADVICE ON THAT, MIC.

THAT LINE MIGHT WORK
WITH WOMEN DOWN UNDER

BUT AS A RULE

AMERICAN WOMEN DON'T LIKE
BEING COMPARED
TO ANYONE'S MOTHER.

I'M PULLING YOUR LEG, MAJOR.

MY MOM WAS THREE TIMES
YOUR SIZE AND TWICE AS MEAN.

[ both chuckle ]

BUT, GOSH,
SHE WAS A SPECIAL LADY...

AND I JUST THINK
YOU ARE, TOO.

THAT'S ALL.

IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG
WITH THE ELEVATOR?

YEAH. IT'S STUCK
BETWEEN FLOORS, MA'AM.

I'D TAKE THE STAIRS
IF I WERE YOU.

OH... IF YOU WERE ME,
YOU'D BE AT HOME WHINING

WITH YOUR FEET UP.

[ elevator thuds and dings ]

HAVE TO DO THAT AGAIN
SOMETIME SOON.

THANK YOU.
I THINK I'LL PASS.

[ soft music playing ]

[chuckles]

Roberts:
ON MAY 2ND, 1998

LANCE CORPORAL EDWARD CARR
TURNED 21.

HE DECIDED TO CELEBRATE
HIS BIRTHDAY WITH
HIS FELLOW MARINES

AT A LOCAL WATERING HOLE.

YES, HE HAD
A LITTLE TOO MUCH TO DRINK

AND YES, HIS STAFF N.C.O.HAD TO DRIVE HIM HOME...

ONLY SHE DIDN'T DRIVE HIM
TO
HIS
PLACE.

SHE TOOK HIM TO HER
PLACE,
PRESUMABLY TO DRY OUT.

TWO WEEKS LATER, HE WAS
REPRIMANDED FOR HIS BEHAVIOR.

THIS WAS TO BECOME THE FIRST
OF MANY UNFAVORABLE REPORTS

AND EVALUATIONS
FILED AGAINST MY CLIENT

WHICH ULTIMATELY LED
TO A SPECIAL COURT-MARTIAL

FOR DERELICTION OF DUTY
DUE TO CULPABLE INEFFICIENCY.

THE POINT OF THIS HEARING,
PLEASE?

NEW INFORMATION
HAS COME TO OUR ATTENTION

WHICH HAS A DIRECT BEARING
ON THIS CASE, YOUR HONOR.

SPECIFICS, MR. ROBERTS.

IF STAFF SERGEANT MORRIS
WOULD BE SO KIND AS TO STAND UP?

OBJECTION, YOUR HONOR.
THE STAFF SERGEANT
IS NOT ON TRIAL HERE.

WE PUT THIS CASE TO BED
ALMOST A YEAR AGO?

Judge: COMMANDER IMES HAS
A POINT, LIEUTENANT.

I BELIEVE THE EVIDENCE
SPEAKS FOR ITSELF, SIR.

HUMOR HIM.

[ tense music playing ]

Roberts: YOUR HONOR,
IT IS OUR INTENTION TO PROVE

THAT STAFF SERGEANT
AILEEN MORRIS

PURPOSEFULLY ORCHESTRATED
THE SEDUCTION OF CORPORAL CARR

WITH THE INTENTION
OF GETTING HERSELF PREGNANT

THEN TOOK STEPS TO DISTANCE
THE CORPORAL FROM HERSELF

IN ORDER TO KEEP HER SCHEME
A SECRET.

YOU'RE KIDDING.
Roberts: NO, SIR.

YOUR HONOR, THIS IS INSULTING
TO THE STAFF SERGEANT
AS WELL AS THE COURT.

CAN YOU PROVE THAT THE CHILD
SHE'S CARRYING IS HIS?

A SIMPLE DNA TEST
WOULD DO SO, YOUR HONOR.

THE STAFF SERGEANT HAS
NO INTENTION
OF SUBMITTING HERSELF

OR HER UNBORN BABY
TO ANY UNNECESSARY
MEDICAL PROCEDURES

ESPECIALLY THIS LATE
IN HER PREGNANCY.

DO YOU HAVE
ANY OTHER EVIDENCE

TO SUBSTANTIATE
YOUR CLAIM, LIEUTENANT?YES, SIR.

THEN WE WILL PROCEED
WITH THIS HEARING TOMORROW
AT 1400.

[ pounds gavel ]

UH, WHAT OTHER EVIDENCE
DO WE HAVE, SIR?

I'M WORKING ON IT.

Mackenzie: SURPRISE!
woman 2: SURPRISE!

[ laughing ]Harriet: OH, YOU GUYS!

IT IS A BOY, RIGHT?WHOOPS.

WHEN LAST WE CHECKED,
WITH FINGERS CROSSED...

[ gasping ] THIS IS SO ADORABLE![ laughs ]

LOOK AT THIS!
WHERE IN THE WORLD
DID YOU FIND IT?

CAROLYN PICKED IT OUT.
THEY, UH, THEY DIDN'T HAVE
MARINE GREENS.

OH, IT'S SO CUTE.
BUD'S GONNA LOVE IT.
YOU GUYS DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THIS.

ARE YOU KIDDING?
I LOVE SHOPPING
FOR BABY CLOTHES.

OF COURSE,
I ONLY GET TO BUY THEM
WHEN A FRIEND'S HAVING A BABY.

OH, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN
THE LITTLE OUTFITS
THEY HAD FOR GIRLS.

THESE LITTLE CAPRI PANTS
WITH A LEOPARD-PRINT
TOP AND MATCHING...

SHOES!SHOES!

Mackenzie: YOU'RE SO LUCKY,
HARRIET.

I WISH I WAS HAVING A BABY.

DON'T YOU, MAC?

WELL, I-I THINK
I SHOULD PROBABLY HAVE

A-A RELATIONSHIP
WITH SOMEONE FIRST.OH...

[ laughing ] OH, YEAH...DETAILS, DETAILS.

Carolyn: YEAH,
GETTING PREGNANT'S
THE EASY PART.

FINDING THE RIGHT GUY--
THAT'S THE HARD PART.

WELL, NOT FOR HARRIET.HEY...

YOU KNOW-- MAYBE BUD COULD
GET US ALL PREGNANT.

[ both laughing ]

LOOK AT THE PANTS![ laughs ]

[ doorbell buzzing ]

HEY!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT HERE?

UH, YOU WEREN'T HOME.
I WAS GOING TO LEAVE.

WELL, YOU SHOULD HAVE
LET YOURSELF IN
AND WAITED INSIDE, YOU NUT.

[ sighing ]

HEY, WHAT'S UP?
IT SEEMS LIKE
SOMETHING'S WRONG.

YOU TELL ME.

BEFORE I LEFT THIS MORNING,
I SAW YOUR REQUEST
TO CHANGE YOUR DESIGNATOR.

[ sighing ]

I WAS GOING TO TELL YOU.
TELL ME WHAT, HARM?

YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T FLY
BECAUSE OF YOUR EYES.

I HAD THEM FIXED,
LASER ABLATION.

SO YOU CAN GO BACK TO FLYING?

IT'S A LONG SHOT, BUT, UH...

IF MY, UH, REQUEST IS APPROVED

AND IF I DECIDE THAT, UH...

THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO DO
AND, UH, IF I MAKE
MY QUALIFICATIONS...

A LOT OF "IFS"
THERE.

BUT YOU MAKE IT SOUND LIKE
YOU HAVEN'T DECIDED YET.I HAVEN'T.

BUT YOU SUBMITTED
YOUR LETTER?

THIS MORNING.

IT'S THE FIRST STEP
IN A LONG PROCESS, JORDAN,
YOU KNOW THAT.

I'VE BEEN DUMPED
FOR ANOTHER WOMAN BEFORE,

BUT I'VE NEVER BEEN DUMPED
FOR AN AIRPLANE.

I'M NOT DUMPING YOU.

LOOK, JORDAN, FRANKLY,
YOU'RE ONE OF THE REASONS

THAT I HAVEN'T MADE UP MY MIND.

BUT IF I DO DECIDE
TO RETURN TO A SQUADRON,
IT DOESN'T CHANGE WHAT WE HAVE.

IT DOES FOR ME.

I FELL IN LOVE
WITH HARMON RABB THE LAWYER,

NOT A FIGHTER PILOT
I MIGHT SEE TWICE A YEAR
IF I'M LUCKY.

I'M THE SAME MAN, JORDAN.

YOU'RE NOT MAKING THIS EASY.

WHY SHOULD I?

THE MAN I LOVE JUST TOLD ME
HE'S THINKING ABOUT LEAVING.

JAG, NOT YOU.IT'S THE SAME THING!

CALL ME WHEN YOU'VE
MADE UP YOUR MIND.

JORDAN...[ door slams ]

[ gloomy music playing ]

[ sighs ]

Chloe: IF YOU MARRIED MY DAD,
THEN I COULD HAVE
A MOM FOR REAL.

AND THEN YOU TWO
COULD HAVE A BABY

AND THEN I'D HAVE PARENTS
AND A LITTLE SISTER.

YOU KNOW, YOUR DAD'S GOING
TO HAVE HIS HANDS FULL

WITH ONE NEW WOMAN--
HE DOESN'T NEED ME.

BUT I DO.

I'M ONLY A PHONE CALL AWAY.

[ knock at door ]

BE RIGHT BACK.

[ tranquil music playing ]

HI, THERE.
HEY.

OH, HI, CHLOE.

HEY, HARM.

I'M... SORRY. I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU HAD COMPANY.

OH, NO, WE'RE JUST HAVING
A SLUMBER PARTY HERE.

ARE YOU OKAY?

YEAH, I'M-I'M-I'M GOOD.

I WAS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
I THOUGHT I'D STOP BY.

DO YOU GUYS WANT
TO BE LEFT ALONE?

YEAH.
NO.

[ clears throat ] THAT'S OKAY.

I GOT TO GO PUT ON
MY JAMMIES ANYWAY.

YOU TWO BEHAVE
YOURSELVES OUT HERE.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

WELL, UH...

JORDAN AND I HAD A FIGHT.

MMM, LET ME GUESS,
SHE, UH, WANTS
A COMMITMENT?

HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT?

WELL, IT'S... WHAT EVERY
WOMAN WANTS, I GUESS.

[ chuckles ] WHAT, YOU'RE NOT--
YOU'RE NOT READY TO COMMIT?

WELL, THE RULES OF ENGAGEMENT
HAVE CHANGED, MAC.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

I HAD EYE SURGERY.
I GOT MY NIGHT VISION BACK.

WHAT?

WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?A COUPLE WEEKS AGO.

YOU HAD A MAJOR OPERATION
AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME?

A TRIPLE BYPASS
IS A MAJOR OPERATION, MAC.

EYE SURGERY'S LIKE
HAVING YOUR TEETH CLEANED.

I TELL YOU
WHEN I'M GOING TO THE DENTIST.

WELL, I WASN'T SURE
HOW IT WOULD WORK OUT, FRANKLY.

BUT IT DID?

OH, LIKE A DREAM.

OH...

[ sighing ] SO, WHAT NOW?
YOU THINKING ABOUT TRYING...

TO RETURN TO A...
FIGHTER SQUADRON?

I SPENT MY LIFE PREPARING
TO BE A NAVAL AVIATOR, MAC.

YEAH, EXCEPT FOR THREE YEARS
IN LAW SCHOOL AND...

FOUR YEARS AS A JAG.

I, UH...
I PUT MY REQUEST IN
TO ADMIRAL CHEGWIDDEN TODAY

TO RETURN
TO ACTIVE FLIGHT STATUS.

YOU CAN'T DO THAT.

WHY NOT?

BECAUSE IF YOU DO,
IT WOULD MEAN THAT FLYING IS
MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU THAN JAG,

IT'S MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU
THAN JORDAN

AND IT'S MORE IMPORTANT TO...
TO YOU THAN EVERYTHING.

WELL, I THOUGHT YOU,
OF ALL PEOPLE,

WOULD KNOW HOW MUCH
FLYING MEANS TO ME.I DO.

I DO, HARM

BUT THIS IS THE LAST THING
THAT I NEED RIGHT NOW.
[ chuckles ]

YOU'RE STARTING TO SOUND
A LOT LIKE JORDAN, MAC.

YOU GUYS ALMOST FINISHED?

YEAH, I GUESS SO.

YEAH.

WELL, UH...

WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT LATER.

I BETTER GET GOING.

SEE YOU LATER, CHLOE.

GOOD-BYE.CUTE TOES!

VERY COLORFUL.
IT'S JUST THE BEST.

CATCHY.
YEP.

[ sighs ]

I THINK I UNDERSTAND NOW
WHY YOU CAN'T MARRY MY DAD.

YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH HARM.

[ tranquil music playing ]

[ knocking ]

GOOD EVENING, MAJOR.

MIC...

UH...

THESE ARE FOR YOU...
[ chuckling ]:
WOW, THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL.

THANK YOU.

AND THIS, LITTLE LADY...
IS FOR YOU.

THANK YOU.
LIEUTENANT COMMANDER,
MIC BRUMBY,

THIS IS MY
LITTLE SISTER, CHLOE.

IT'S A PLEASURE
TO MEET YOU, CHLOE.

I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU HAD A SISTER, MAC.

OH, SHE'S NOT
REALLY MY SISTER.

MAC'S KIND OF LIKE
MY SURROGATE MOTHER.

[ chuckles ]

SO, WHO'S UP FOR PIZZA?
I AM.

YOU JUST HAD TWO POUNDS
OF CHICKEN WINGS.

I AM AT A VITAL STAGE
OF MY DEVELOPMENT

AND I REQUIRE
LOTS OF PROTEIN.

PROTEIN, YES--
PIZZA, NO.

MAYBE SOME OTHER TIME, MIC.

BAD TIMING, HUH?
THE WORST.

SAY GOOD NIGHT, MIC."GOOD NIGHT, MIC."

[ all laughing ]

[ inaudible ]BYE.

[ sighs ]

I THINK THAT AUSTRALIAN
REALLY LIKES YOU.

[ chuckles ]

LUCKY ME.

ARE YOU SAD
BECAUSE HARM MIGHT LEAVE JAG?

WERE YOU EAVESDROPPING?

IT'S A SMALL APARTMENT.MMM...

I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I'M FEELING.

[ crickets chirping ]

WELL, IF IT MAKES
YOU FEEL ANY BETTER,

YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT HARM'S
IN LOVE WITH YOU, TOO.

HARM HAS A GIRLFRIEND.

A WOMAN CAN SENSE
THIS KIND OF THING.

OH, REALLY?

YES, REALLY.

♪ HARM AND MAC ♪

♪ SITTIN' IN A TREE ♪

♪ K-I-S-S-I-N... ♪

G!

[ both laughing ]

[ both laughing ]

[ both sighing ]

HOW COME BOYS DON'T GET
ANY SMARTER WITH AGE?
[ chuckles ]

THAT'S ONE OF NATURE'S
GREATEST MYSTERIES.

I'M GOING
TO MISS YOU, KIDDO.

I'M GOING
TO MISS YOU, TOO.

[ sighs ]

[ indistinct chatter ]

Man: SOMETIMES, I COME HERE
TO REMIND MYSELF
WHY WE DO THE THINGS WE DO.

NOW, WHAT SEEMS
TO BE THE PROBLEM, A.J.?

I, UM...

I NEED TO ASK
A FAVOR, SIR.

WELL, I'M NOT ONE
WHO GRANTS MANY FAVORS, ADMIRAL.

NOR AM I ONE TO ASK.

SO, WHAT IS IT?

IT'S, UM, IT'S
ABOUT COMMANDER RABB.

OH, WHAT'S HE DONE NOW?

IT'S NOT SO MUCH
WHAT HE'S
DONE.

IT'S WHAT HE MAY
WANT TO DO--

CHANGE HIS DESIGNATOR.

IF HE WANTS TO FLY,
TELL HIM TO HOP
ON A RED-EYE TO VEGAS.

THE NAVY IS NOT
IN THE PRACTICE
OF SPENDING MILLIONS OF DOLLARS

RETRAINING PILOTS
WHO ARE PAST THEIR PRIME.

SIR, HE WAS,
UM, HE WAS
GROUNDED, UH...

DUE TO A VISION PROBLEM
THAT'S SINCE BEEN CORRECTED.

RABB'S A DAMN FINE AVIATOR
AND HE JUST WANTS
THE OPTION TO FLY AGAIN.

KNOWING FULL WELL
IT'S CAREER SUICIDE?[ scoffs ]

WELL, SIR,
WITH ALL DUE RESPECT,
IT IS HIS CAREER.

WELL, IT WAS UNTIL NOW.

NOW, I KNOW
YOU DON'T LIKE ME, A.J...

MR. SECRETARY...AND TO BE HONEST,
I DON'T GIVE A DAMN

BUT I ALSO KNOW
THAT COMING HERE
AND ASKING ME FOR HELP

MUST BE ABOUT THE HARDEST THING
IN THE WORLD FOR YOU.

SO, WHY ARE YOU
PUTTING YOURSELF THROUGH THIS?

RABB HAS GIVEN YOU MORE TROUBLE
THAN ANYONE ELSE
UNDER YOUR COMMAND.

WHY ARE YOU GOING
TO THE WALL FOR HIM?

I BELIEVE IN HIM, SIR.

WELL, THAT MAKES ONE OF US.

RABB'S BEEN A THORN
IN MY SIDE

EVER SINCE I FIRST
HEARD HIS NAME.

SO, I CAN'T SAY AS I HAVE
ANY REAL DESIRE TO HELP HIM.

ON THE OTHER HAND,
IT WOULD BE A GOOD OPPORTUNITY

TO GET HIM THE HELL
OUT OF WASHINGTON.
I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

I APPRECIATE IT, SIR.
I OWE YOU ONE.

YES... YOU DO.

Roberts: I'D LIKE TO OFFER
INTO EVIDENCE
EXHIBITS "G" AND "H"--

PERFORMANCE EVALUATION
RECOMMENDATIONS

FROM STAFF SERGEANT MORRIS
TO THE COMMANDING OFFICER.

Carolyn: OBJECTION.
IRRELEVANT.

I'M NOT DONE, SIR.

OVERRULED.
GET TO YOUR POINT,
LIEUTENANT.

MY CLIENT HAD
AN EXEMPLARY RECORD

BEFORE HE WAS SEDUCED
BY THE STAFF SERGEANT.

AFTER THAT...
OBJECTION.
FACTS NOT IN EVIDENCE.

WE HAVE SEEN NO PROOF
OF THIS ALLEGED SEDUCTION.

OH, REALLY?

I SUPPOSE THAT THIS IS
A BOWLING BALL
UNDERNEATH HER UNIFORM.

Judge: LIEUTENANT,
ANOTHER REMARK LIKE THAT
AND I'LL CITE YOU WITH CONTEMPT.

SORRY, SIR.
DON'T APOLOGIZE TO ME
--
TO THE STAFF SERGEANT.

I APOLOGIZE.

YOU'RE 32 YEARS OLD
AND HAVE A HISTORY

OF FAILED RELATIONSHIPS,
CORRECT?
OBJECTION. HEARSAY.

Judge: SUSTAINED.

IS IT NOT TRUE THAT YOU WANT
TO BE A MOTHER
AND HAVE A FAMILY

BUT YOU DON'T WANT
TO HAVE A HUSBAND
OR A BOYFRIEND

OR REALLY ANY MAN
IN YOUR LIFE?

CAN YOU BLAME ME, SIR?

YOU SAW A POTENTIAL FATHER
IN LANCE CORPORAL CARR.

YOU SEDUCED HIM
WITH THE INTENTION
OF GETTING PREGNANT

THEN, YOU GAVE HIM
A BAD EVALUATION.

OBJECTION, YOUR HONOR.
THE LIEUTENANT
IS EDITORIALIZING.

Judge: SUSTAINED.

ASK A QUESTION, LIEUTENANT,
OR REST.

WHY DID YOU KEEP
THIS PREGNANCY A SECRET
FROM LANCE CORPORAL CARR?

IT WAS NONE
OF HIS BUSINESS, SIR.

Carolyn: YOUR HONOR,
THE STAFF SERGEANT HAS BEEN

MORE THAN PATIENT
WITH MR. ROBERTS.

I WOULD LIKE TO REQUEST THAT
WE PUT AN END TO THIS NOW.

SHE'S GOT A POINT.

NOW, I'VE GIVEN
YOU EVERY CHANCE
BUT YOU'RE SPINNING YOUR WHEELS.

I'VE HEARD ENOUGH.

ONE LAST QUESTION,
YOUR HONOR.

MAKE IT SNAPPY.

STAFF SERGEANT MORRIS,
DID YOU SEDUCE MY CLIENT

WITH THE PURPOSE
OF GETTING PREGNANT

THEN TAKE STEPS TO TRANSFER HIM

THE MOMENT THAT YOU REALIZED
YOU'D CONCEIVED?

IT'S A SIMPLE QUESTION.

PLEASE ANSWER THE QUESTION,
STAFF SERGEANT.

FAILURE TO DO SO IS
AS GOOD AS AN ADMISSION
OF GUILT.

OBJECTION-- BADGERING.

WITNESS IS BEING
UNCOOPERATIVE, SIR.

I CAN'T ANSWER, SIR.

THE WITNESS IS HOSTILE,
YOUR HONOR.I'M NOT HOSTILE, SIR.

I THINK MY WATER BROKE.

NICE JOB, LIEUTENANT.
YOU BADGERED HER INTO LABOR.

Judge: WE'LL RECESS
UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

[ gavel thuds ]

HOW YOU DOING, STAFF SERGEANT?

I'VE BEEN BETTER, SIR.

ALL RIGHT,
COMMANDER, LIEUTENANT,
WILL YOU HELP THE STAFF SERGEANT

INTO ONE
OF THE BENCHES, PLEASE?

OH, BOY.
JUST BREATHE THROUGH IT.

[ exhales ]
DO YOU HAVE ANYBODY
WE CAN CALL

TO TAKE YOU
TO THE HOSPITAL?NO.

I CAN TAKE HER
TO THE HOSPITAL.

I DON'T THINK
THAT'S A GOOD IDEA,

LANCE CORPORAL,
ALL THINGS CONSIDERED.

OOH.
[ grunting ]

I-I DON'T THINK
I CAN DO THIS ALONE.

WELL, THEN,
LET ME TAKE YOU.

IT'S YOUR CALL,
STAFF SERGEANT.

HE SHOULD BE THERE.

HE IS THE FATHER.

I AM?

YEAH.REALLY?

YEAH.

WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS LATER...

AFTER YOU GET ME
TO THE HOSPITAL.

Judge:
CONGRATULATIONS,
LIEUTENANT.

YOU JUST WON YOUR RIGHT
TO APPEAL.

[ Sergeant Morris moans softly ]

[ knocking at door ]

Albert: ENTER!

SIR.

AT EASE.

I, UM, SPOKE
TO THE SECNAV

CONCERNING YOUR REQUEST
TO CHANGE OF DESIGNATOR.

IT'S IN HIS HANDS NOW.

THANK YOU, SIR.
DON'T THANK ME,
COMMANDER.

FOR THE RECORD,
IF YOU DO THIS

IT'LL BE
THE STUPIDEST THING YOU'VE DONE
SINCE I'VE BEEN HERE.

WELL, I'M SORRY YOU
FEEL THAT WAY, ADMIRAL.

IF YOU OPPOSE IT
SO STRONGLY, SIR

WHY GO THE SECNAV
IN THE FIRST PLACE?

I'M AFRAID I DON'T HAVE TIME
FOR THIS RIGHT NOW, COMMANDER.

I'M TRYING
TO FIND YOUR REPLACEMENT

UNLESS I CAN CONVINCE
COMMANDER BRUMBY

TO EXTEND THE LENGTH
OF HIS EXCHANGE PROGRAM.

YOU'RE CONSIDERING REPLACING ME
WITH BRUMBY, SIR?

BETTER SOONER THAN LATER.
DISMISSED.

AYE, AYE, SIR.

[ door opens ]

[ door closes ]

[ sighs ]

I DON'T THINK I COULD EVER
THANK YOU ENOUGH

FOR BRINGING CHLOE
AND ME TOGETHER, MAJOR.

IT WAS MY
PLEASURE, CHIEF.

I HOPE YOU'LL CONTINUE TO PLAY
AN IMPORTANT ROLE
IN MY DAUGHTER'S LIFE NOW.

I WOULDN'T HAVE IT
ANY OTHER WAY, CHIEF.

WE'RE ABOUT
AS CLOSE TO A FAMILY

AS THREE STRANGERS
COULD BE, MA'AM.

SO... YOU BETTER CALL ME KYLE
FROM HERE ON IN.

OKAY, KYLE.

[ sighs ]

WELL, I WISH
WE COULD STAY LONGER

BUT WE'VE GOT A PLANE
TO CATCH.

THANKS AGAIN, MAJOR.

I'LL SEND YOU A LETTER
AS SOON AS I GET
TO MY GRANDPARENTS.

YOU BETTER. [ laughs ]
I WILL...

AND A PICTURE OF ME
RIDING A HORSE.

COOL.

COME ON, YOU.

[ sighs ]

[ tranquil music playing ]

BE GOOD.

I WILL.

[ sighs ]

[ laughing ]

BYE.

[ sighs ] BYE.

[ groans ]

HELLO.

OOH... [ sighs ]

[ groans ]

OH.

MMM.

[ sighs ]

[ sighs ]

[ clears throat ]

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING
SPECIFIC, MAJOR?

[ sighing ] UH, YEAH--
SOMETHING WITH ENOUGH SUGAR
TO PUT ME INTO A COMA.

ONE OF YOUR CASES
GIVING YOU TROUBLE?

OH, IT'S NOT WORK, SIR.

MY CAREER IS GREAT.

IT'S MY LIFE
THAT SUCKS.

WOULD YOU, UH...

WOULD YOU LIKE
TO TALK ABOUT IT?

NOT REALLY, SIR.

WELL, IF THERE'S
ANYTHING I CAN DO...

THERE ISN'T.

I... I'M SORRY...

BUT...
YOU'RE ONE OF THEM.

EXCUSE ME?

DID I SAY THAT
OUT LOUD, SIR?

[ chuckles uncomfortably ]

I'M SORRY, ADMIRAL.
I MEANT NO OFFENSE.
IT'S JUST THAT...

YOU'RE A MAN AND, AS USUAL,
MOST OF MY PROBLEMS COME
FROM MEN.

WHO MIGHT IT BE THIS TIME?

THE COMMANDER.BRUMBY OR RABB?

[ sighs ]
BOTH OF THEM, SIR.

HMM.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU, SIR.

OH.

OW! AH-AH, OW, OW,
OW-OW-OW, AH, AH.

AH.

[ grunting ]

[ groans ]

OW!

[ gasps ]

[ tranquil music playing ]

[ groaning ]

OW, OW, OW, OW, OW.

OW!

HARRIET, WHA...?

IT'S TIME, SIR.

YOU... YOU MEAN
IT'S BABY TIME?

YES, SIR. [ panting ]

UH...

CAN-CAN YOU GET UP?

EASY. OW.

OKAY, HERE, PUT
YOUR ARM AROUND MY WAIST.

THERE YOU GO.[ groaning ]

WE HAVE TO STOP MEETING
LIKE THIS, HARRIET.

PEOPLE ARE GOING
TO TALK.

DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH, SIR.

I'M GOING TO DROP IT
RIGHT HERE.

OW!
DON'T EVEN KID
LIKE THAT, OKAY?

WHO'S KIDDING? [ groaning ]

Rabb: TINER.

SIR.[ Harriet groans ]

GET LIEUTENANT ROBERTS
ON THE DOUBLE.

Jason: YES, SIR.

SIT.

UH, CAN I GET YOU ANYTHING?

YOU DON'T HAVE
AN EPIDURAL IN YOUR DESK
DO YOU, SIR? [ grunts ]

UH, OKAY, HANG IN THERE
AND, UH...

LIEUTENANT ROBERTS
WILL BE HERE SOON

AND HE'LL GET YOU
TO THE HOSPITAL
IN NO TIME.

[ groaning ]

LIEUTENANT, SHE'S IN LABOR.

YES, PETTY OFFICER TINER,
SHE IS, BUT WE HAVE EVERYTHING
UNDER CONTROL.

[ groans ]NO, SIR, NOT HER.

I MEAN, SHE LOOKS LIKE
SHE'S IN LABOR, TOO,
BUT IT'S LIEUTENANT SIMS.

HARRIET?
HARRIET'S IN LABOR?

MY WIFE IS IN LABOR.
I GOT TO... UH...

ARE YOU GOING
TO BE OKAY HERE?WE'LL BE FINE.

'CAUSE I GOTTA--GO! GO!

GOOD LUCK,
STAFF SERGEANT MORRIS.

YOU TOO, LIEUTENANT.
[ groaning ]

HARRIET?
ARE YOU IN LABOR?

THAT'S A BIG 10-4, MAJOR.WHERE'S BUD?

Roberts: HARRIET!

ARE YOU HAVING
A CONTRACTION?

[ both breathing ]

THAT WAS, UH...
WOW. THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT.

YOUR CONTRACTIONS
ARE TOO LONG, SWEETIE.

TELL THAT TO MY UTERUS.

HOW FAR APART...?[ gasps ]

[ groans ]ARE YOU HAVING
ANOTHER CONTRACTION?

THIS ISN'T SUPPOSED
TO HAPPEN LIKE THIS.

SO SUE ME.

HAS YOUR WATER BROKEN?

YES, SIR.
I THINK SO, SIR.

I'M GOING TO GO
GET THE VAN, SWEETY.

OH, HEY, HEY...SORRY, IT'S AN EMERGENCY.

I'M STILL WORKING
ON THAT.

[ thuds ]

OH, NO.

HARRIET!

[ groans ]

Mackenzie:
SHE'S HAVING DOUBLE-PEAKED
CONTRACTIONS.

THE ELEVATOR'S NOT WORKING.
SHE'S NEVER GOING
TO MAKE IT DOWN THE STAIRS.

I'LL CALL AN AMBULANCE.

OKAY, WHO'S YOUR DOCTOR?

DR. BRADLEY AT BANNEKER.
555-0110.

I'LL CALL HIM.

TINER, STAY WITH HER.

JUST BREATHE, MA'AM.

[ breathing ]

[ bangs on door ]

YOU GOT TO GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I'M HAVING A BABY.

THERE'LL BE AN AMBULANCE
HERE ANY MINUTE.

I THINK I NEED
TO LIE DOWN, SIR.

LET'S PUT HER IN
THE ADMIRAL'S OFFICE.

OKAY.TINER, SEE IF YOU CAN
FIND A BLANKET

AND SOMETHING FOR HER
TO LIE DOWN ON, WILL YOU?AYE, SIR.

WHAT CAN WE DO TO MAKE YOU
FEEL BETTER, HARRIET?

SHOOT ME.RIGHT HERE.

OKAY, HOLD HER.YEAH.

OKAY. ALL RIGHTOKAY. EASY.

OH, MAN!

[ groans ]

YOU OKAY?MM-HMM.

OKAY. BE RIGHT BACK.

WHAT?

THE DOCTOR SAID
SHE SKIPPED RIGHT THROUGH

THE FIRST STAGE OF LABOR,
AND WENT INTO THE SECOND.

THAT'S WHY HER LABOR'S
SO HARD.

THAT'S OUR HARRIET--
ALWAYS THE OVERACHIEVER.

WHAT'S ALL THE COMMOTION?

HARRIET'S GONE INTO LABOR.

GIVE THEM HELL, LIEUTENANT.

[ groaning ]

WHAT IF SHE STARTS
TO HAVE THE BABY

BEFORE THE AMBULANCE
GETS HERE?SHE WON'T.

YEAH, BUT IF SHE DOES, YOU KNOW
WHAT TO DO. YOU'VE DELIVERED
BABIES BEFORE, RIGHT?

BABY.
BABY-- ONE.

BUT THE FACT IS,
YOU'VE DONE IT.

MAC, IT'S SOMETHING
I DID ONCE.

I DON'T WANT TO DO IT AGAIN
IF I CAN HELP IT.

I'LL DO IT.

YOU'VE DELIVERED A BABY?

YEAH. IT'S A PIECE OF CAKE.

DELIVERED DOZENS OF THEM
BACK HOME IN OZ.

SORT OF COMES WITH LIVING
IN THE OUTBACK.

REALLY? YOU EVER DELIVER ONE
IN A HOSPITAL
FULL OF TERRORISTS?

Mackenzie: I'LL GET OUT
THE MEASURING STICK LATER, BOYS.

HARM, GO GET BUD.
BRUMBY, YOU'RE WITH ME.

BEEN WAITING TO HEAR THAT.

ALL RIGHT, HARRIET,
YOU'RE IN GOOD HANDS NOW.

COMMANDER BRUMBY'S
DELIVERED BABIES BEFORE.THAT'S RIGHT, LIEUTENANT.

NOW DON'T YOU FRET.

MOTHER NATURE USUALLY SEES
EVERYTHING GOES OFF
WITHOUT A HITCH.

AND WHEN IT DOESN'T,
WE'RE HERE TO GIVE HER A HAND.

JUST RELAX. BREATHE.OKAY

IT'S NOT A BREECH, IS IT?

BREECH?
GOD, I HOPE NOT.

WELL, NO WORRIES
IF IT IS.

YOU SEE, THE KEY IS TO GET
A ROPE AROUND THEIR FEET.

A ROPE?I DON'T WANT A ROPE
AROUND MY FEET.

NOT YOURS, LIEUTENANT,
THE BABY'S.

BUT DON'T WORRY.
[ groans ]

I ONCE DELIVERED
EIGHT KIDS IN SIX HOURS.

AND ONE OF THEM
HAD TWO HEADS.

[ gasps ]

THAT'S MORE COMMON
IN SHEEP THAN HUMANS.

OUT!

WHAT? DID I SAY
SOMETHING WRONG?

GOOD-BYE, DR. DOLITTLE.

HERE, LIEUTENANT.
THIS WILL HELP
YOU BREATHE EASIER

AND TAKE SOME
OF THE EDGE OFF THE PAIN.

MY GRANDMOTHER'S
A MIDWIFE.

MY MOM HAD MY BROTHERS
AND SISTERS AT HOME.

WHERE'S BUD?
I NEED HIM HERE.

HARM WENT
TO GET HIM, SWEETIE.

YOU'RE IN GOOD HANDS, OKAY?

I KNOW IT'S DIFFICULT, MA'AM.

BUT JUST TRY AND RELAX.

I'M JUST GOING
TO TAKE A QUICK PEEK
AND SEE HOW FAR ALONG YOU ARE.

OKAY.

WHAT IS IT?

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

IT'S CROWNING.

I CAN SEE ITS HEAD.

THAT'S A GOOD THING, RIGHT?

THAT'S A GOOD THING,
PETTY OFFICER?

TINER!

Mackenzie:
HEY, WHERE'S BUD?I CAN'T FIND HIM.

HOW'S SHE DOING?
EVERYTHING'S UNDER CONTROL.

[ crashes ]
WAS.

TINER?

Rabb:
HEY, YOU ALL RIGHT?

HE FAINTED.

NO, I DIDN'T.

LIKE A SCHOOLGIRL.

UH, PETTY OFFICER TINER,
WHY DON'T YOU GO OUTSIDE
AND GET SOME FRESH AIR?

YES, MA'AM.

[ phone ringing ]

YEAH?

YEAH, JUST A SECOND.
[ Harriet groans ]

HARRIET, IT'S FOR YOU.

ME?

HELLO?

BUD, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?

I GOT STUCK IN THE ELEVATOR.

I KNOW, I KNOW, HARRIET.
I JUST WASN'T THINKING.

JUST KEEP BREATHING.

[ breathing ]

OKAY, WHERE IS THE AMBULANCE?

I DON'T KNOW,
BUT IT SHOULD
BE HERE BY NOW.

I NEED TO PUSH.

NO. DON'T PUSH.NO. DON'T PUSH.

HARRIET? HARRIET?
[ Harriet screams ] OW!

HANG ON, HARRIET, I'M COMING.

[ dramatic music playing ]

IS THE AMBULANCE HERE YET?
woman: NO.

HAS ANYONE SEEN THE E.M.T. CREW?
Man: NO WORD ON THAT, MA'AM.

[ sighs ]

EXCUSE ME, COLONEL,
COMMANDER

AS SOON AS THE AMBULANCE
GETS HERE,

WOULD YOU SEND THEM
RIGHT TO THE ADMIRAL'S OFFICE?

THE AMBULANCE JUST LEFT
WITH STAFF SERGEANT MORRIS,
MAJOR.

WHO IS STAFF SERGEANT MORRIS?

SHE WAS A WITNESS.
SHE WAS IN LABOR.

THEY TOOK
THE WRONG PREGNANT LADY.

[ knocking ]
Roberts:
SOMEBODY OPEN THE DOOR!

BUD?

UH, OPEN IT UP.OKAY.

[ knocking ]Roberts: I NEED TO GET
OUT OF HERE. NOW. HELLO?

[ groans ]

WHAT THE HELL?ADMIRAL.

I CAN EXPLAIN, SIR.

I DON'T THINK
THAT'S GOING TO BE NECESSARY.

THERE'S A AMBULANCE
ON THE WAY, SIR.

OH. THERE BETTER
BE ROOM FOR TWO.

I CAN'T DO THIS.Albert: SURE YOU CAN.
THE HARD PART'S OVER.

HAND ME THE BAG, RABB.

NO, IT HURTS TOO MUCH.

I WANT YOU TO LOOK AT HARM.
FOCUS ON HIS FACE.
BREATHE WITH HER.

[ breathing ]

[ breathing ]

GOOD. OKAY.
ON THIS NEXT CONTRACTION,

I WANT YOU TO PUSH
AS HARD AS YOU CAN, OKAY?

PUSH!
YOU CAN DO IT, HARRIET.

[ Harriet groans ]

Albert: GOOD ONE!
THAT'S A GOOD ONE, HARRIET!

YEAH, THAT'S GREAT! OKAY?
KEEP BREATHING.

HEY, HIS HEAD'S OUT.
YOU WANT TO FEEL IT?

NO!OKAY!

NOW, THIS NEXT CONTRACTION'S
REAL IMPORTANT, HARRIET, OKAY?

WE NEED TO GET HIS SHOULDERS
ALL THE WAY OUT.

I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!

Rabb:
YOU CAN DO IT, HARRIET.
THIS IS IT.

IT HURTS TOO MUCH!

COME ON.

BREATHE.
[ screams ]

Roberts: HARRIET?

BUD! OH, BUD!

BUD, HAND ME A TOWEL.
GIVE ME YOUR SHOELACES.

UH, SIR?I NEED TO TIE OFF
THE UMBILICAL CORD.

BREATHE, BREATHE.

GIVE ME A TOWEL.Rabb: BREATHE.

Albert: COME ON,
COME ON, LIEUTENANT.

PUSH! THAT'S AN ORDER!

OW!

BUD, PUT A TOWEL ON MY SHOULDER.

PUT A TOWEL
ON MY SHOULDER.

LEFT SHOULDER. LEFT.

COVER THE MEDALS.

[ screams ]

HERE WE GO.
HERE WE GO.

OKAY, OKAY.

THAT'S GOOD.
THAT'S GOOD.

[ baby crying ]OH, YEAH, BUDDY.
THERE YOU GO.

TAKE THE STRING
OUT OF MY MOUTH.

TIE IT RIGHT ABOVE
MY FINGERS.

HERE YOU GO.

ALL RIGHT,
CUT THE STRING.

GO UP SIX INCHES--
TIE IT AGAIN.

[ soft music playing ]

OKAY, NOW CUT.
CUT IT RIGHT BETWEEN.

GOOD.
NOW GET ANOTHER TOWEL.

GET ANOTHER TOWEL.

HERE YOU GO.
PUT YOUR KNEES DOWN, DARLING.

CONGRATULATIONS,
BUD AND HARRIET.

LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVE
A HEALTHY BABY BOY.

NICE WORK, LIEUTENANT.

YOU DID IT, HARRIET.

THANK YOU.
THANK ALL OF YOU.

WE HAVE A SON.

I'M A DADDY.

[ chuckles ] WELCOME
TO THE CLUB, LIEUTENANT.

TAKE IT EASY WITH HER.
HERE WE GO.

CAREFUL WITH THEM.

THAT'S MY SON.

Man: ONE, TWO, THREE

QUITE A DAY, HUH, SIR?

YEP.

NEVER A DULL MOMENT
AROUND THIS PLACE.

YOU OKAY?

EVERY TIME I THINK I'VE PUT
THE PIECES OF MY LIFE TOGETHER,

SOMEBODY COMES ALONG
AND JUMBLES THEM BACK UP.

EVERYBODY WHO'S
EVER MEANT ANYTHING TO ME
IS LEAVING MY LIFE.

YOU'LL BE OKAY, MAC.
YOU'LL GET TO SEE
CHLOE AGAIN.

ONE DAY, YOU'LL HAVE
KIDS OF YOUR OWN.

YEAH? NOT AT THIS RATE.

MY BIOLOGICAL CLOCK IS GOING OFF
AND I KEEP HITTING
THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

TELL YOU WHAT...

FIVE YEARS FROM THIS MOMENT,

IF NEITHER OF US
IS IN A RELATIONSHIP,

WE'LL GO HALVES ON A KID.

YOU AND ME?

HAVE A BABY TOGETHER?

WITH YOUR LOOKS
AND MY BRAINS,

HE'LL BE PERFECT.

AND WHAT IF SHE HAS
YOUR LOOKS AND MY BRAINS?

THAT COULD WORK, TOO.

SO WHAT DO YOU SAY?

DEAL?DON'T MAKE A PROMISE
YOU CAN'T KEEP.

I HAVEN'T YET.

[closing theme music plays]