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1
00:00:03,020 --> 00:00:06,020
Good night, lowell.
Last one out locks up.
2
00:00:06,020 --> 00:00:08,020
No problem.
Night, helen.
3
00:00:31,310 --> 00:00:35,320
That old black magic
Has me in its spell
4
00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:40,320
That old black magic
That you weave so well
5
00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:44,030
The icy fingers
Up and down my spine
6
00:00:44,030 --> 00:00:45,530
The same, the same,
The same
7
00:00:46,030 --> 00:00:47,460
The same old witchcraft
8
00:00:47,460 --> 00:00:49,870
When your eyes meet--
9
00:00:49,870 --> 00:00:50,870
Mine.
10
00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:54,540
Uh, hi, joe.
11
00:00:54,540 --> 00:00:56,540
Thought I was
The only one here.
12
00:00:56,540 --> 00:00:59,880
Uh, just, uh,
Checking out the microphone.
13
00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:02,880
Ha! Well, it seems to
Work great.
14
00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:06,880
Oh, well, good night.
15
00:01:07,880 --> 00:01:08,890
See you tomorrow.
16
00:01:09,390 --> 00:01:10,390
Good night, lowell.
17
00:01:11,050 --> 00:01:12,060
[door closing]
18
00:01:19,230 --> 00:01:21,230
Final game
Of the world series.
19
00:01:21,230 --> 00:01:24,230
2 outs. Bottom of the 9th.
The red sox are down by...
20
00:01:25,740 --> 00:01:27,240
[seagulls cawing]
21
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:29,200
(brian)
Nantucket tower,
22
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,900
This is cessna nevada
1-2-1 papa-papa.
23
00:02:31,900 --> 00:02:35,410
Request permission
To change altitude
To 5,000 feet. Over.
24
00:02:35,410 --> 00:02:37,410
(man)
Roger, sandpiper.
Affirmative. Out.
25
00:02:38,910 --> 00:02:39,910
[sighing]
26
00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:41,910
Joe,
27
00:02:42,410 --> 00:02:45,750
Is there something
A little eerie
About this flight?
28
00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:49,050
I mean,
I think it's this tour group
That you booked.
29
00:02:49,050 --> 00:02:53,020
Not one of them
Has said a word
Since they got on the plane.
30
00:02:53,020 --> 00:02:57,190
And something's wrong here.
Something's terribly,
Terribly wrong. I mean,
31
00:02:57,190 --> 00:02:58,560
It's almost as if...
32
00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:00,560
They've turned
Into mannequins!
33
00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:02,070
[screaming]
34
00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:08,840
Funny, brian.
35
00:03:09,710 --> 00:03:11,210
Why are we
Flying mannequins?
36
00:03:11,210 --> 00:03:15,210
Why can't we fly humans?
It's what a real airline's
Supposed to do, isn't it?
37
00:03:15,210 --> 00:03:17,710
Hey, it's the off-season.
You take whatever business
Comes your way.
38
00:03:17,710 --> 00:03:19,220
According to my figures,
39
00:03:19,220 --> 00:03:20,880
We're barely going
To squeak through.
40
00:03:20,880 --> 00:03:22,390
Well, ever since you lost
Your pilot's license
41
00:03:22,390 --> 00:03:24,890
You've been obsessing
About this company's finances.
42
00:03:24,890 --> 00:03:26,290
I wish you'd stop
Worrying about it.
43
00:03:26,620 --> 00:03:27,920
Somebody's gotta worry.
44
00:03:30,260 --> 00:03:31,260
Ladies and gentlemen,
45
00:03:31,260 --> 00:03:34,260
Just encountering
A little turbulence here.
46
00:03:34,260 --> 00:03:36,270
In the unlikely event
Of a water landing,
47
00:03:36,270 --> 00:03:40,270
Please use the passenger
In front of you
As a flotation device.
48
00:03:40,270 --> 00:03:42,270
Oops, seem to have
Had a little mishap
Back there, joe.
49
00:03:42,270 --> 00:03:43,770
Better put that leg back on.
50
00:03:45,540 --> 00:03:48,040
How many pioneers of aviation
Have said those very words?
51
00:03:50,350 --> 00:03:51,350
Joe.
52
00:03:52,350 --> 00:03:54,350
Joe, come here
For a second, will you?
53
00:03:54,350 --> 00:03:56,850
This guy tries to sue us
He won't have
A leg to stand on.
54
00:03:56,850 --> 00:03:57,850
[chuckling]
55
00:03:59,220 --> 00:04:01,520
A leg to stand on.
56
00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:03,430
[blowing]
Hello? Is this thing on?
57
00:04:03,430 --> 00:04:05,230
Would you shut up?
Take a look at that.
58
00:04:05,630 --> 00:04:07,130
What?
59
00:04:07,130 --> 00:04:09,630
Nantucket tower.
This is cessna nevada
1-2-1 papa-papa.
60
00:04:10,130 --> 00:04:12,640
Have you got
Any other aircraft
In the vicinity? Over.
61
00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:14,640
(man)
No traffic in the area. Over.
62
00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:15,640
Nothing at all? Over.
63
00:04:16,140 --> 00:04:17,640
Negative, sandpiper. Over.
64
00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:21,140
Thanks. Out.
65
00:04:21,140 --> 00:04:24,650
What the hell is that?
I don't know, man, it's like
It's hovering out there.
66
00:04:24,650 --> 00:04:26,080
[rumbling]
Holy--
67
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,550
Did--did you see--
Did you see how fast
That thing was going?
68
00:04:28,550 --> 00:04:29,850
Nothing moves that fast.
69
00:04:33,020 --> 00:04:34,020
It's gone.
70
00:04:37,730 --> 00:04:38,730
I think we just saw a u.F.O.
71
00:04:39,230 --> 00:04:40,830
[both laughing]
72
00:04:43,730 --> 00:04:46,800
You didn't happen to get
The license plate number
On that thing, did you?
73
00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:48,310
No,
But the bumper sticker said,
74
00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:51,310
"55,000 miles per hour.
A law we can live with."
75
00:05:02,250 --> 00:05:03,250
Fay, do you have a minute?
76
00:05:03,690 --> 00:05:04,590
Why, sure, helen.
What is it?
77
00:05:05,090 --> 00:05:06,420
Well, I was just going
Over my books
78
00:05:06,420 --> 00:05:08,220
And I'm sure
It was just an oversight,
79
00:05:08,220 --> 00:05:10,160
But I noticed that
You haven't paid
Your lunch bill this month.
80
00:05:10,530 --> 00:05:12,360
I-I'm sure I did.
81
00:05:12,360 --> 00:05:15,360
Uh, no, it's just that
When someone pays me
82
00:05:15,360 --> 00:05:17,370
I mark it down
In my ledger right here.
83
00:05:17,370 --> 00:05:19,100
I'm sure you do,
But I distinctly remember
84
00:05:19,100 --> 00:05:21,600
Putting the money
In an envelope
And giving it to you.
85
00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,440
$42.50.
86
00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:28,280
Well, you know, memory can
Play tricks on us sometimes.
87
00:05:28,280 --> 00:05:32,050
Evidently your books
Can play some tricks, too.
88
00:05:32,050 --> 00:05:35,550
Well, if you would like
To look at my accounts,
I can clearly show you--
89
00:05:35,550 --> 00:05:38,050
Oh, helen, I wouldn't dream
Of doubting your honesty.
90
00:05:38,050 --> 00:05:40,520
I'll just pay the bill
91
00:05:41,020 --> 00:05:42,020
Again.
92
00:05:44,030 --> 00:05:46,530
Forget it, fay.
I don't care
About the money.
93
00:05:46,530 --> 00:05:48,530
Uh, would it be all right
If I give you a check?
94
00:05:49,030 --> 00:05:50,530
Fay,
I'm not going to accept it.
95
00:05:50,530 --> 00:05:53,540
I have 2 forms
Of identification.
96
00:05:53,540 --> 00:05:54,670
Fay.
97
00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:05,580
My bank has a service charge
Of 5 cents for each check.
98
00:06:08,020 --> 00:06:10,520
Please excuse me, fay.
99
00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:11,520
Here you go.
100
00:06:13,520 --> 00:06:15,020
I couldn't take this, helen.
101
00:06:15,020 --> 00:06:17,030
I know how much
A nickel means to you.
102
00:06:20,360 --> 00:06:22,370
(brian)
Roy, roy.
103
00:06:22,370 --> 00:06:24,370
[clears throat]
Did your pilots
Report seeing
104
00:06:24,370 --> 00:06:26,670
Anything strange tonight?
I mean, besides your tie?
105
00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:29,540
What are you getting at,
Hackett?
106
00:06:30,540 --> 00:06:33,040
Joe and I saw a u.F.O.
107
00:06:33,040 --> 00:06:34,810
[helen gasping]
Really?
A u.F.O.
108
00:06:34,810 --> 00:06:36,310
Oh, I love that stuff.
109
00:06:36,310 --> 00:06:37,750
You know, close encounters
Of the third kind,
110
00:06:37,750 --> 00:06:39,250
That's one of
My favorite movies.
111
00:06:39,250 --> 00:06:41,850
You know how
That big mother ship
Passed overhead?
112
00:06:41,850 --> 00:06:44,190
And, hey!
Who knew truffaut
Could act, huh?
113
00:06:44,190 --> 00:06:46,190
[laughing]
Had this cute
Little french accent--
114
00:06:46,520 --> 00:06:47,320
Yo, helen,
Can I just jump in here?
115
00:06:47,820 --> 00:06:49,330
Just for one second.
What did it look like?
116
00:06:49,330 --> 00:06:51,330
Ah, well,
There was a blue light--
No, I mean the mother ship.
117
00:06:51,330 --> 00:06:53,200
I never saw the movie.
What did it look like?
118
00:06:53,530 --> 00:06:55,530
It was this huge thing.
Had lights all around it.
119
00:06:55,530 --> 00:06:57,530
Hey, hey, hey,
I--I saw the real thing
Myself, ok?
120
00:06:57,530 --> 00:07:00,540
There was a blue light,
Shot from one part of the sky
To the other
121
00:07:00,540 --> 00:07:02,540
In like 4 seconds, ok.
Hovered there,
122
00:07:02,540 --> 00:07:04,540
Shot straight up,
Disappeared.
123
00:07:04,540 --> 00:07:05,840
Wow, that's really weird.
124
00:07:05,840 --> 00:07:07,640
No, not really,
I always wondered
125
00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:11,080
When the people
From his planet were
Gonna come back for him.
126
00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:13,580
I'm not kidding around, roy.
I really did see this thing.
127
00:07:13,580 --> 00:07:15,380
Well, you're not alone, brian.
128
00:07:15,380 --> 00:07:18,890
My mother-in-law claims
She was abducted by aliens.
129
00:07:19,390 --> 00:07:21,390
Claims they took her
Aboard their spaceship,
130
00:07:21,390 --> 00:07:24,390
Examined her genitalia
And then sent her back.
131
00:07:27,030 --> 00:07:30,430
I contend her neighbor vern
Took her aboard his winnebago,
132
00:07:30,430 --> 00:07:33,500
But she's sticking
To her story.
133
00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:37,010
Thank you, carl sagan
For that close encounter
Of the stupid kind.
134
00:07:37,010 --> 00:07:40,340
Now, would you get out
Of here and finish working
On that tower spotlight, huh?
135
00:07:40,340 --> 00:07:43,450
Brian, maybe that spotlight
Is what you saw.
136
00:07:43,450 --> 00:07:45,010
Yeah, fay's probably right
137
00:07:45,280 --> 00:07:46,780
Except you can see it
A lot better
138
00:07:46,780 --> 00:07:49,790
Once I take it out
Of the truck
And finish assembling it.
139
00:07:49,790 --> 00:07:51,220
Hackett, hackett.
It could have been anything.
140
00:07:51,220 --> 00:07:53,120
It could have been
Heat lightning,
141
00:07:53,120 --> 00:07:54,420
The northern lights,
A meteor.
142
00:07:54,660 --> 00:07:55,660
A big, florescent eagle.
143
00:07:55,660 --> 00:07:57,090
There you go.
144
00:07:57,090 --> 00:07:58,490
It could have been
A weather balloon.
145
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:00,330
M-moving at the speed
Of light?
146
00:08:00,330 --> 00:08:02,630
Well, you know,
When the air's leaking out,
They just...
147
00:08:02,630 --> 00:08:05,130
[spitting]
148
00:08:05,130 --> 00:08:07,640
Do you have to do that,
Lowell?
149
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:09,140
Well, you do if you want
To make the...
150
00:08:09,140 --> 00:08:10,640
[spitting]
Sound.
151
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:12,170
Look, look,
If you don't believe me,
152
00:08:12,170 --> 00:08:15,180
Then why don't you
Just ask joe,
Because he saw it also. Right?
153
00:08:15,180 --> 00:08:16,180
Saw what?
154
00:08:16,680 --> 00:08:18,680
The u.F.O.
They don't believe
That we saw it.
155
00:08:21,380 --> 00:08:23,390
I don't know what
You're talking about, brian.
Stop fooling around.
156
00:08:23,390 --> 00:08:24,390
It's been a long night.
157
00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:28,960
I know what I saw.
158
00:08:29,290 --> 00:08:31,290
Gee, hackett,
159
00:08:31,290 --> 00:08:33,300
I don't know
What to say.
160
00:08:33,300 --> 00:08:34,900
Oh, yes, I do.
161
00:08:34,900 --> 00:08:36,400
Na-nu, na-nu, na-nu!
162
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:40,500
Hey, uh,
163
00:08:40,500 --> 00:08:42,010
Do me a favor,
Will you, joe?
164
00:08:42,510 --> 00:08:44,510
Can you see if there's
A large dagger
165
00:08:45,010 --> 00:08:47,010
Sticking out of my back?
Oh, that's right. Sorry.
166
00:08:47,010 --> 00:08:49,250
You don't
See anything.
167
00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:50,750
Brian, you saw it.
168
00:08:50,750 --> 00:08:52,750
I saw it. The mannequins
In the plane saw it.
169
00:08:52,750 --> 00:08:54,250
But if word gets out
About this,
170
00:08:54,250 --> 00:08:56,250
We're gonna be known
As crackpot airlines.
171
00:08:56,250 --> 00:08:58,250
Well, excuse me,
But it's difficult for me
To be quiet
172
00:08:58,250 --> 00:09:01,260
About the most exciting
Experience I've ever had
In an airplane.
173
00:09:01,260 --> 00:09:02,760
Wait--wait a second.
174
00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:04,260
Second most exciting...
175
00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:07,260
Third...
176
00:09:07,260 --> 00:09:08,700
Do helicopters count?
177
00:09:08,700 --> 00:09:11,600
Look, look,
Business is bad enough.
178
00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:13,100
We can't afford any bad press.
179
00:09:13,100 --> 00:09:15,040
All right, all right.
I see your point.
180
00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:18,040
I won't mention a word
Of this to anybody else.
181
00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:21,010
Where are those pilot
Irregularity forms?
182
00:09:21,010 --> 00:09:23,010
No, you--you are not
Filing a report on this
To the f.A.A.
183
00:09:23,510 --> 00:09:25,010
There's no way I want this
On permanent record.
184
00:09:25,510 --> 00:09:27,520
Joe, joe, you know
As well as anybody else
185
00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:31,320
That if a pilot sees something
Out of the ordinary,
He's required to report it.
186
00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:33,090
Normally, I would agree--
Well, what are we
Supposed do?
187
00:09:33,590 --> 00:09:34,520
Are we supposed
To forget about it?
188
00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:36,390
Maybe the f.A.A.
Can explain this.
189
00:09:36,390 --> 00:09:38,390
Or maybe somebody's
Already made out a report.
190
00:09:38,390 --> 00:09:39,800
Don't you want to know
What we saw?
191
00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:42,300
Yes, of course I do,
192
00:09:42,300 --> 00:09:44,300
But you don't understand
The ramifications of this,
Brian.
193
00:09:44,300 --> 00:09:47,100
Ramifications.
Do you remember
Fred atkins?
194
00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:48,970
Yeah, he flew charter
Out of new bedford.
195
00:09:49,270 --> 00:09:51,040
Right, well,
He reported seeing a u.F.O.
196
00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:54,040
The next thing he knew,
He was blacklisted.
They broke him.
197
00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:56,550
Last I heard, he was
Sitting on the corner
Of 3rd and main,
198
00:09:56,550 --> 00:09:57,550
Selling used chewing gum.
199
00:10:00,680 --> 00:10:02,190
That was fred atkins?
You betcha.
200
00:10:03,190 --> 00:10:04,190
That gum was used?
201
00:10:12,030 --> 00:10:14,460
Here's your water, fay.
Can I get you
Anything else?
202
00:10:14,460 --> 00:10:16,870
No, thank you,
I brought my lunch.
203
00:10:16,870 --> 00:10:18,740
Uh, what do I owe you
For the water?
204
00:10:18,730 --> 00:10:20,240
Nothing.
205
00:10:21,740 --> 00:10:23,610
That napkin will
Be $42.50.
206
00:10:23,940 --> 00:10:24,940
I paid you.
207
00:10:25,410 --> 00:10:26,410
Oh, I beg to differ.
208
00:10:26,410 --> 00:10:28,740
You can beg all you want,
I'm not paying you again.
209
00:10:28,740 --> 00:10:30,010
Ladies, ladies.
210
00:10:30,010 --> 00:10:33,020
Now this has gone on
For over a week.
211
00:10:33,020 --> 00:10:35,520
I'm seeing a beautiful
Friendship torn asunder,
212
00:10:36,020 --> 00:10:37,520
Rent in twain,
213
00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:39,020
Bifurcated.
214
00:10:40,020 --> 00:10:41,020
Lowell,
Have you been listening
215
00:10:41,020 --> 00:10:43,530
To those stupid
Vocabulary tapes again?
216
00:10:43,530 --> 00:10:45,130
Indubitably.
217
00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:49,300
Well, I know how to
Solve this altercation.
218
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,300
Please enlighten us.
219
00:10:52,300 --> 00:10:53,300
What?
220
00:10:57,310 --> 00:10:58,670
Tell us how.
221
00:10:58,670 --> 00:11:01,280
Well, you can do
What the wife and I do.
222
00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:02,280
Arm-wrestle.
223
00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:05,250
Well, but you two can
Leave your clothes on.
224
00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:06,250
Or not.
225
00:11:08,450 --> 00:11:11,450
Lowell, I'm not going
To arm-wrestle fay.
226
00:11:11,450 --> 00:11:13,460
[imitating chicken clucking]
227
00:11:16,630 --> 00:11:18,930
Are you
Calling me a chicken?
228
00:11:18,930 --> 00:11:20,200
If the beak fits.
229
00:11:23,530 --> 00:11:25,530
Ok, you got it.
Let's do it.
230
00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:28,040
Great. I'll referee.
231
00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:30,040
I love a good catfight.
232
00:11:30,040 --> 00:11:32,540
All right, ladies.
233
00:11:32,540 --> 00:11:35,040
We're playing by the marquis
Of queensbury rules here.
234
00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:38,050
Elbows on the table
At all times.
235
00:11:38,050 --> 00:11:40,050
Spitting, biting
And scratching
236
00:11:40,050 --> 00:11:42,550
Are, of course,
Real crowd pleasers.
237
00:11:42,550 --> 00:11:43,550
All right, ladies,
238
00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:45,190
Ready,
239
00:11:45,620 --> 00:11:46,620
Set,
240
00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:48,560
Go.
241
00:11:51,890 --> 00:11:52,730
Give it up, fay.
242
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:54,830
In your dreams.
243
00:11:55,970 --> 00:11:57,970
Helen, I saw a cockroach
244
00:11:57,970 --> 00:11:59,470
Scurry under your counter
245
00:11:59,470 --> 00:12:01,970
And I followed him.
You know, like I usually do.
246
00:12:01,970 --> 00:12:04,270
And then I--
Lowell, can this wait?
247
00:12:04,270 --> 00:12:06,280
Well, I thought it was...
248
00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:08,280
Pertinent.
249
00:12:09,780 --> 00:12:10,780
Anyway, I...
250
00:12:10,780 --> 00:12:14,080
I found this envelope.
It's got $42.50 in it.
251
00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:16,820
That's the money
I gave you.
252
00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:19,120
It must have fallen
Off the counter, fay.
253
00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:23,030
I guess there's no reason
To keep doing this.
254
00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:25,860
So why don't we just quit?
255
00:12:27,730 --> 00:12:29,130
Fine. Let go.
No, you let go.
256
00:12:29,470 --> 00:12:32,300
No, you let go first.
No, I-I'm not falling
For that old trick.
257
00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:34,900
It flew straight up
258
00:12:35,900 --> 00:12:36,910
And it disappeared.
259
00:12:36,910 --> 00:12:38,410
So,
260
00:12:38,410 --> 00:12:40,580
What do you think,
Inspector hanson?
261
00:12:40,580 --> 00:12:44,580
Well, that's
A very interesting story,
Mr. Hackett
262
00:12:44,580 --> 00:12:48,580
But I'm afraid the f.A.A.
Can't take your report
At face value.
263
00:12:48,580 --> 00:12:50,590
There are a few things
We've found
264
00:12:51,090 --> 00:12:54,090
That cast some doubt
On your, uh, credibility.
265
00:12:54,090 --> 00:12:55,590
My credibility. Like what?
266
00:12:55,590 --> 00:12:57,530
Well, it says here
267
00:12:57,530 --> 00:13:01,530
You once reported
Seeing amelia earhart
268
00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:03,030
Over the bermuda triangle.
269
00:13:03,370 --> 00:13:06,130
Yeah, yes, that was just--
I was playing a little joke
270
00:13:06,140 --> 00:13:07,500
On a buddy of mine,
That's all.
271
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:08,840
Oh!
272
00:13:08,840 --> 00:13:09,840
A joke.
(brian)
Yeah.
273
00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:11,840
[feigning laughter]
274
00:13:14,240 --> 00:13:16,210
Like this u.F.O. Sighting?
275
00:13:16,210 --> 00:13:19,150
No, no, this is different.
276
00:13:19,150 --> 00:13:21,350
Well, how would I know that?
277
00:13:21,350 --> 00:13:24,650
Well, uh,
My brother joe saw it,
For one.
278
00:13:25,050 --> 00:13:26,390
Oh, really?
Maybe I should talk to him.
279
00:13:26,390 --> 00:13:28,290
No, no, you can't.
280
00:13:28,290 --> 00:13:30,790
It, well, it wouldn't do you
Any good anyway.
Because he's a...
281
00:13:30,790 --> 00:13:31,730
Mute.
282
00:13:32,630 --> 00:13:33,630
He's a mute.
283
00:13:35,430 --> 00:13:36,900
Joe, joe, uh,
What are you doing here?
284
00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:38,400
[door closing]
I thought
It was your day off.
285
00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:39,900
I have some paperwork.
286
00:13:39,900 --> 00:13:41,900
He speaks.
It's a miracle.
287
00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:44,310
Hi--hi,
I'm joe hackett.
288
00:13:44,310 --> 00:13:47,710
So you're the other one
Who was present
At this alleged sighting.
289
00:13:48,210 --> 00:13:50,210
Inspector hanson,
F.A.A.
290
00:13:51,710 --> 00:13:53,220
You went and filed
That report, didn't you?
291
00:13:53,220 --> 00:13:55,680
Oh, he sure did.
292
00:13:56,590 --> 00:13:59,090
Frankly, off the record,
I'm surprised.
293
00:13:59,090 --> 00:14:02,090
If you're looking
For some attention
For your little airline here,
294
00:14:02,090 --> 00:14:04,630
This is the wrong kind.
295
00:14:04,630 --> 00:14:06,130
Listen, uh,
Is there any way
296
00:14:06,130 --> 00:14:08,600
That we can make
This report disappear?
297
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:10,600
I'm afraid
It's a little late for that.
298
00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:12,600
Have a nice day.
299
00:14:17,710 --> 00:14:19,710
What the hell
Did you think
You were doing?
300
00:14:19,710 --> 00:14:22,210
I couldn't help myself.
I wanted to find out
What we saw.
301
00:14:22,210 --> 00:14:24,210
You better hope nothing
Comes of this, brian.
302
00:14:24,210 --> 00:14:26,720
You better hope
It gets buried under tons
Of bureaucratic paperwork
303
00:14:26,720 --> 00:14:28,720
And no one else hears
A thing about it,
You know why?
304
00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:32,220
Please tell me why, joe.
I want you to go on
And on and on about this.
305
00:14:32,220 --> 00:14:35,460
Because if I lose my business,
I'm holding you
Personally responsible.
306
00:14:35,460 --> 00:14:37,830
Oh, come on!
Look, all I want from you
307
00:14:37,830 --> 00:14:41,360
Is a promise
That this goes no further.
Not a word.
308
00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:43,370
Ok, ok, fine,
You have my word.
309
00:14:43,370 --> 00:14:45,870
From now on my story is:
The only thing
I saw that night
310
00:14:45,870 --> 00:14:47,870
Is the sky,
The stars, the moon,
311
00:14:48,870 --> 00:14:50,370
And you, joe hackett.
312
00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:57,950
Announcing the arrival
Of aeromass flight 14
313
00:14:58,450 --> 00:14:59,980
From hartford.
314
00:14:59,980 --> 00:15:02,490
We at aeromass would like
To congratulate
Our colleagues
315
00:15:02,480 --> 00:15:04,490
At sandpiper air
For the inauguration
316
00:15:04,490 --> 00:15:08,490
Of their new nonstop service
To the planet zoldar.
317
00:15:10,230 --> 00:15:12,230
Is there
A brian hackett here?
318
00:15:14,230 --> 00:15:15,630
Brian hackett?
Yeah, that's me.
319
00:15:15,630 --> 00:15:18,470
Well, my colleagues and I
Learned about
Your u.F.O. Sighting.
320
00:15:18,470 --> 00:15:20,970
Uh--uh, now,
I don't know anything
About a u.F.O.
321
00:15:20,970 --> 00:15:23,410
We just want you to know
That you're not alone.
322
00:15:23,910 --> 00:15:24,910
We've seen it, too.
323
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:43,830
So, exactly who are you?
324
00:15:44,330 --> 00:15:46,830
We're just people
From different parts
Of the country
325
00:15:46,830 --> 00:15:47,830
And different walks of life
326
00:15:47,830 --> 00:15:49,830
Who happen to share
The common experience
327
00:15:50,330 --> 00:15:52,330
Of having seen a u.F.O.
328
00:15:52,330 --> 00:15:54,270
And because of the skepticism
We've encountered
329
00:15:54,270 --> 00:15:56,270
From the government,
Among others,
330
00:15:56,270 --> 00:15:59,540
We decided to form
Our own independent
Investigative unit.
331
00:15:59,540 --> 00:16:01,180
Well, I'm-- I'm afraid
All you people have come
332
00:16:01,180 --> 00:16:02,180
An awful long way
For nothing,
333
00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:03,680
Because I didn't
See anything.
334
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:06,620
Mr. Hackett,
We have an informant
At the f.A.A.
335
00:16:06,620 --> 00:16:08,120
We know
You reported a sighting.
336
00:16:08,120 --> 00:16:09,720
Who are you, the k.G.B.?
337
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:12,490
I--I tell you what,
Why don't we just
Bypass the rubber hoses
338
00:16:12,490 --> 00:16:15,990
And go straight on to ludmila
And the compromising
Videotape, ok?
339
00:16:16,490 --> 00:16:18,490
We all understand
What you're going through,
Mr. Hackett.
340
00:16:18,490 --> 00:16:21,000
Uh, please,
Call me x.R.Q. 24.
341
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,230
We're all just
Ordinary people.
342
00:16:24,730 --> 00:16:25,600
I'm a bookkeeper.
343
00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:27,400
Al teaches physics
In high school.
344
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:28,400
Tom's a dentist.
345
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:29,840
John's a contractor.
346
00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:32,340
And I'm a pilot.
Thank you all for coming
To career day.
347
00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:35,480
You know, none of us
Wanted to see a u.F.O.
348
00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:38,810
We didn't ask
For this to happen.
It was thrust upon us.
349
00:16:38,810 --> 00:16:40,620
All right, look, I--I already
Told the f.A.A. My story.
350
00:16:40,620 --> 00:16:43,120
I don't feel like
Sounding like a jackass
Twice in one day.
351
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:45,950
Look, mr. Hackett,
I--I understand how you feel.
352
00:16:45,950 --> 00:16:47,920
I'm a very
Successful contractor,
353
00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:49,430
But who wants
Their kitchen remodeled
354
00:16:49,420 --> 00:16:53,260
By some whacko who
Saw a u.F.O. Over
His grandson's tree house.
355
00:16:53,260 --> 00:16:54,760
Who'd they send
To talk to you?
356
00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:56,270
Uh, an inspector hanson.
357
00:16:56,770 --> 00:16:57,900
Oh, hanson.
358
00:16:57,900 --> 00:17:00,900
Now, they never send
Hanson out unless
They want to stop a report
359
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:02,400
Dead in its tracks.
360
00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:04,240
So, your sighting
Must have been significant.
361
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:05,910
Well, I-- you know...
362
00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:09,010
I didn't see anything.
363
00:17:09,010 --> 00:17:10,880
Ok, ok, I'll tell you
What you saw.
364
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:12,380
It was a blue light.
365
00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:15,380
It flew from one side
Of the sky to the other
In a matter of seconds.
366
00:17:15,380 --> 00:17:19,990
At that point it either made
A loop or it flew straight up
And disappeared.
367
00:17:19,990 --> 00:17:21,090
(joe)
It flew straight up.
368
00:17:24,330 --> 00:17:25,330
So you saw it, too.
369
00:17:25,330 --> 00:17:27,330
Oh, oh, oh,
So apparently rats
370
00:17:27,330 --> 00:17:29,830
That desert a sinking ship
Can get back on board.
Ok, fine.
371
00:17:32,130 --> 00:17:34,440
So, exactly
What do you want from us?
372
00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:36,610
We want you
To take us up in your plane.
373
00:17:36,610 --> 00:17:37,940
Tonight?
374
00:17:37,940 --> 00:17:40,440
In new mexico
They had sightings
For 6 straight nights.
375
00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:43,410
If the same holds true here,
This is a perfect
Window of opportunity.
376
00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:45,780
Excuse me, excuse me.
So, come on, joe,
What do you say?
377
00:17:45,780 --> 00:17:47,180
Come on, what else
Are you going to do besides?
378
00:17:47,180 --> 00:17:48,920
You're going to stay home
And watch t.V.?
379
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:52,350
Well, I still have 5 hours
Of the civil war
To get through.
380
00:17:52,350 --> 00:17:53,860
Let me save you some time.
The north wins.
381
00:17:54,360 --> 00:17:56,890
Come on, joe.
Please, what do you say?
Come on.
382
00:17:56,890 --> 00:17:59,330
All right, I'm with you.
Great, let's go.
383
00:18:03,830 --> 00:18:05,730
Hey, joe, uh,
Just out of curiosity,
384
00:18:05,730 --> 00:18:07,670
What made you
Change your mind?
385
00:18:07,670 --> 00:18:09,170
Well, before these people
Came along,
386
00:18:09,670 --> 00:18:12,170
The only person
That could corroborate
My story was you.
387
00:18:12,170 --> 00:18:14,540
No offense, brian,
But give me a break.
388
00:18:22,820 --> 00:18:26,320
I hope you don't mind
Our inviting a reporter
From the local paper along.
389
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:27,790
No, I guess it's ok.
390
00:18:28,220 --> 00:18:30,430
Anything we can do,
To further the cause
Of science.
391
00:18:30,430 --> 00:18:32,430
Kind of glad you came along,
Aren't you?
392
00:18:32,430 --> 00:18:33,930
Yeah, I really am.
393
00:18:33,930 --> 00:18:35,930
I haven't said much about it
These last few days.
394
00:18:36,430 --> 00:18:38,700
But it has been
On my mind constantly.
395
00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:40,240
(reporter)
Mr. Hackett,
396
00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:42,740
What do you hope
To accomplish tonight?
397
00:18:42,740 --> 00:18:45,240
Well, we don't know that
We'll accomplish anything.
398
00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,740
Ideally, we hope to see
Another u.F.O.,
399
00:18:47,740 --> 00:18:49,750
But if not, at the very least
400
00:18:49,750 --> 00:18:51,750
We'd like to
Encourage other people
401
00:18:51,750 --> 00:18:53,750
Who have seen
What we've seen
To step forward
402
00:18:53,750 --> 00:18:55,250
And let their voices be heard.
403
00:18:55,250 --> 00:18:57,750
Yeah, yeah,
That and to meet women.
404
00:18:59,990 --> 00:19:02,490
Thanks.
405
00:19:02,490 --> 00:19:05,490
Ah, there's the lighthouse.
We're getting close
To the spot where we saw it.
406
00:19:05,490 --> 00:19:07,000
Is there anything
On the monitor?
407
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,000
Not yet.
408
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:11,130
That's pretty fancy-looking
Equipment you got there.
What does it do?
409
00:19:11,130 --> 00:19:12,640
We discovered
In previous sightings
410
00:19:12,630 --> 00:19:14,640
That there was a drop
In atmospheric ionization
411
00:19:15,070 --> 00:19:18,840
Within a 3-kilometer radius,
So we brought along
An ionization counter.
412
00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:20,340
[beeping]
Also a high-speed,
Infrared camera,
413
00:19:20,340 --> 00:19:23,150
Gravitational flux monitor
And an electronic
Triangulator.
414
00:19:23,150 --> 00:19:26,450
Hmm, you guys get
The home-shopping channel
On cable, don't you?
415
00:19:26,450 --> 00:19:28,450
[beeping]
Uh, I'm getting
A reading.
416
00:19:28,450 --> 00:19:31,450
4.56 by 32
On the grid.
417
00:19:31,450 --> 00:19:33,460
Ionization 50 m.K.G.
And falling.
418
00:19:33,460 --> 00:19:37,460
Magnitude 3,
Fluctuating at 550.
419
00:19:37,460 --> 00:19:38,760
Oh, I don't
See anything yet.
420
00:19:39,030 --> 00:19:40,500
Prepare for
A close encounter.
421
00:19:41,900 --> 00:19:43,900
This is getting exciting.
422
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:45,730
I hope they know
We come in peace.
423
00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:55,980
Joe, don't...
424
00:19:55,980 --> 00:19:58,280
Don't turn around.
Why?
425
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:00,020
Just trust me
On this one. Just don't.
426
00:20:01,150 --> 00:20:02,650
No, no, joe, don't! Don't!
427
00:20:02,650 --> 00:20:03,650
Oh!
428
00:20:03,650 --> 00:20:05,950
What are you doing?
Hey, no, no.
429
00:20:05,950 --> 00:20:08,760
"Joe hackett,
Owner of sandpiper airlines
430
00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:12,260
And leader
Of u.F.O. Expedition
Demonstrates alien salute."
431
00:20:15,760 --> 00:20:17,770
This is so humiliating.
432
00:20:17,770 --> 00:20:20,770
You know, joe, you should
Wear hats more often.
You look good in foil.
433
00:20:21,140 --> 00:20:21,970
Good night, fellas.
434
00:20:21,970 --> 00:20:23,970
Good night, roy.
Hey, and, you know, roy,
435
00:20:23,970 --> 00:20:25,970
You haven't said
A thing about this all day.
436
00:20:25,970 --> 00:20:27,980
I'm getting kind of nervous.
437
00:20:27,980 --> 00:20:29,780
Go ahead, mock us.
You have a right.
438
00:20:30,050 --> 00:20:32,080
Oh, no, no, hackett,
This is, uh,
439
00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:35,580
This is too easy
For a man of my talents.
440
00:20:35,580 --> 00:20:37,590
It would be like
Hooking a dead fish.
441
00:20:39,090 --> 00:20:41,090
You've taken all the sport
Out of it.
442
00:20:42,090 --> 00:20:43,590
Good night, fellas.
443
00:20:43,890 --> 00:20:46,130
[roy whistling]
He may be slime,
But he's got standards.
444
00:20:47,560 --> 00:20:48,560
Good night, boys.
445
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:49,930
(both)
Night, fay.
446
00:20:49,930 --> 00:20:50,930
How's your arm,
Helen?
447
00:20:51,430 --> 00:20:53,440
Ah, it's a little sore,
But I'll be fine.
448
00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:55,370
Good night, everybody.
Who won
The arm-wrestling match?
449
00:20:55,370 --> 00:20:56,740
Oh, fay licked me.
450
00:20:56,740 --> 00:20:58,240
Ah, she beat you, huh?
451
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:01,740
No, she licked me.
She literally licked my hand.
452
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:05,250
I was so startled
She caught me off guard,
Pinned me to the table.
453
00:21:06,620 --> 00:21:09,420
Experience beats youth
Every time.
454
00:21:12,420 --> 00:21:15,420
We did see something
Out there, didn't we, joe?
Yes, we did.
455
00:21:15,420 --> 00:21:18,430
I mean,
We might not know what it was,
But it was there, right?
456
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:22,000
What do you think?
457
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:25,500
Do you believe
There are actually
Alien spacecrafts up there
458
00:21:25,500 --> 00:21:26,500
Making visits to earth?
459
00:21:26,500 --> 00:21:28,500
I don't know.
460
00:21:28,500 --> 00:21:30,810
It sounds crazy. But I mean,
There are plenty of things
That you can't explain.
461
00:21:30,810 --> 00:21:35,310
The easter island statues
And those circles
In the english wheat fields.
462
00:21:35,310 --> 00:21:37,810
Why decaf coffeepots
Are orange, you know.
463
00:21:39,310 --> 00:21:41,150
You look up at the sky,
464
00:21:41,150 --> 00:21:44,120
All the stars,
The vastness
Of the universe...
465
00:21:44,120 --> 00:21:45,620
And it makes you realize
How arrogant we are
466
00:21:46,120 --> 00:21:48,620
To think that earth
Is the only planet with life.
467
00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:51,630
Makes you feel
Kinda insignificant,
Doesn't it?
468
00:21:51,630 --> 00:21:54,130
Not when my shoes
Are shined.
469
00:21:54,130 --> 00:21:56,130
Well, I don't care
What anyone says,
470
00:21:56,130 --> 00:21:59,070
I think there's got to be
Intelligent life forms
Up there somewhere.
471
00:21:59,470 --> 00:22:00,570
[whirring]
472
00:22:00,570 --> 00:22:02,070
What the hell is that?
473
00:22:02,070 --> 00:22:05,570
(lowell)
Hey, guys, I finally got
This stupid light to work.
474
00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:10,080
Ah, if you think
It's bright now,
Watch this.
475
00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:11,880
[whirring]
476
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:13,150
[electricity surges]
477
00:22:14,650 --> 00:22:16,150
Whoops.
478
00:22:16,150 --> 00:22:18,150
Meanwhile, the search
For intelligent life
479
00:22:18,150 --> 00:22:19,660
Here on earth continues.
36731
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