Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,520 --> 00:00:04,520
Fay, this phone number
You wrote down for me,
2
00:00:05,020 --> 00:00:06,390
I can't tell
If that's a 5 or an 8.
3
00:00:06,390 --> 00:00:08,390
You know,
I've always had
This problem.
4
00:00:08,390 --> 00:00:11,390
People are always
Telling me that my 5s
Look like 8s.
5
00:00:11,390 --> 00:00:13,900
They say, "Fay,
Your 5s look like 8s."
6
00:00:14,900 --> 00:00:16,270
And they do.
7
00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:19,800
W-well, is this
A 5 or an 8?
8
00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:21,100
Um, a 7.
9
00:00:22,110 --> 00:00:23,110
Thank you.
10
00:00:25,110 --> 00:00:26,610
[seagulls cawing]
11
00:01:29,540 --> 00:01:31,040
Good afternoon,
Ladies and gentlemen.
12
00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:33,540
We are about to begin
Pre-boarding
13
00:01:33,540 --> 00:01:38,050
Sandpiper air flight 14
To martha's vineyard,
Hyannis,
14
00:01:38,050 --> 00:01:40,620
And calcutta.
15
00:01:40,620 --> 00:01:44,250
Just checking to see
If you were listening.
16
00:01:44,250 --> 00:01:47,260
Excuse me.
Can you direct me
To the ladies' room?
17
00:01:47,260 --> 00:01:49,260
Oh, uh, certainly.
Up the stairs
And to your right.
18
00:01:49,260 --> 00:01:51,160
Thank you.
19
00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:52,660
[telephones ringing]
Whoop! Whoop! Whoop!
20
00:01:52,660 --> 00:01:55,170
Battle stations, everyone.
We got a live one
On the stairs.
21
00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:56,670
What's goin' on?
22
00:01:56,670 --> 00:01:58,670
What that
Unsuspecting woman
Doesn't know is
23
00:01:58,670 --> 00:02:01,670
That the signs on the men's
And ladies' rooms
Have been switched.
24
00:02:01,670 --> 00:02:03,870
Why?
Because if you can't
Laugh at yourself,
25
00:02:03,870 --> 00:02:05,680
Laugh at somebody else.
26
00:02:05,910 --> 00:02:06,910
(brian)
Now let's watch.
27
00:02:08,180 --> 00:02:10,680
5, 4,
28
00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:13,180
3, 2, 1.
29
00:02:13,180 --> 00:02:15,180
Hey, somebody switched
The signs up here.
30
00:02:15,180 --> 00:02:16,190
If I hadn't stopped
That lady,
31
00:02:16,190 --> 00:02:18,390
She would've gone
Right in the men's room.
32
00:02:18,390 --> 00:02:19,390
What're we gonna
Do with him?
33
00:02:19,390 --> 00:02:21,390
[sighing]
I don't know.
As a child,
34
00:02:21,890 --> 00:02:23,890
They took him to have
His tonsils removed,
35
00:02:23,890 --> 00:02:27,530
But in a tragic mix-up
Gave him a humorectomy.
Mmm.
36
00:02:28,030 --> 00:02:30,270
Hey, lowell, you wanna
Switch those signs
Back the right way?
37
00:02:30,270 --> 00:02:33,300
Ok, but it won't be
Half as funny.
38
00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:36,510
Hey, hackett,
Did you see
Today's sports page?
39
00:02:36,510 --> 00:02:38,510
How'd the celtics
Do yesterday?
They cover?
40
00:02:38,510 --> 00:02:41,510
Yeah. They covered
Their faces
When they left the floor.
41
00:02:41,510 --> 00:02:43,510
Played like
A bunch of jackasses.
42
00:02:43,510 --> 00:02:45,520
Shoot! There goes
2 days' tips.
43
00:02:45,520 --> 00:02:47,620
No clams in the chowder
This week.
44
00:02:47,620 --> 00:02:49,120
No clams in the chowder
Last week.
45
00:02:49,620 --> 00:02:52,020
Is it my fault
The celts are
In a slump?
46
00:02:53,390 --> 00:02:55,390
There's an article
About my boy, r.J.
47
00:02:55,390 --> 00:02:56,890
He's gonna be starting
Defensive tackle
48
00:02:57,390 --> 00:02:58,390
For siasconset high
This fall.
49
00:02:58,390 --> 00:03:01,200
Oh, really?
I played some ball
In high school, too.
50
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:03,430
Played semi-pro myself.
51
00:03:03,430 --> 00:03:05,940
Had guys like you
For lunch.
52
00:03:05,940 --> 00:03:07,940
Must've had
Quite a few of 'em.
53
00:03:09,310 --> 00:03:12,810
Anyway, r.J. Played
His first spring scrimmage
Yesterday.
54
00:03:12,810 --> 00:03:16,310
Made 7 unassisted tackles
And knocked out
The startin' halfback.
55
00:03:16,310 --> 00:03:18,310
That kid didn't come to
For 5 minutes.
56
00:03:18,310 --> 00:03:19,750
[chuckling]
57
00:03:20,250 --> 00:03:21,250
There's a kodak moment.
58
00:03:22,450 --> 00:03:24,960
17 years old,
Got a 19-inch neck.
59
00:03:24,950 --> 00:03:27,020
Uh, does it actually
Look like a neck,
60
00:03:27,020 --> 00:03:30,390
Or does his head grow
Directly into his shoulders?
61
00:03:30,390 --> 00:03:33,200
I had that kid pumpin' iron
By the time
He was 8 years old.
62
00:03:33,700 --> 00:03:36,300
His mother used to hate it.
But what the hell,
She's dead now.
63
00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:37,800
See,
64
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:41,170
The thing is
These kids are not
Naturally aggressive.
65
00:03:41,170 --> 00:03:42,670
You've gotta teach it to 'em.
Well, I taught r.J.
66
00:03:42,670 --> 00:03:44,670
I taught him,
Anybody tries
To get past you,
67
00:03:44,670 --> 00:03:47,580
Anybody tries to move in
On your territory,
68
00:03:47,580 --> 00:03:49,580
Move in
On your business,
69
00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:52,780
A business you started
From nothin',
70
00:03:52,780 --> 00:03:56,650
Poured your heart
And soul into
For 10 years,
71
00:03:56,650 --> 00:03:58,150
Then you got every right
To crush him
72
00:03:58,150 --> 00:04:01,020
Like a squirrel
In a compactor.
73
00:04:01,020 --> 00:04:02,190
More coffee, roy?
74
00:04:02,190 --> 00:04:03,190
No, thanks.
75
00:04:03,190 --> 00:04:06,200
That 2nd cup makes me
A little edgy.
76
00:04:06,660 --> 00:04:08,930
Is it just me
Or did the veins
In roy's neck
77
00:04:08,930 --> 00:04:10,430
Just form
A goat's head?
78
00:04:11,930 --> 00:04:13,440
Well, I should've known.
79
00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:14,940
Known what?
80
00:04:14,940 --> 00:04:17,270
I got this really weird
Phone call last night.
81
00:04:17,270 --> 00:04:18,670
Oh, brian!
82
00:04:18,670 --> 00:04:20,040
Wasn't me!
83
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,040
He's right.
There were no wet
Sucking sounds.
84
00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:24,050
Yeah. That's just
An icebreaker
85
00:04:24,050 --> 00:04:26,550
And, if you'd quit hangin' up,
You'd realize that.
86
00:04:27,050 --> 00:04:28,550
It was roy's kid r.J.
87
00:04:28,550 --> 00:04:31,090
He wants to start taking
Cello lessons from me.
88
00:04:31,090 --> 00:04:33,060
Ho, roy's gonna
Hate that.
89
00:04:33,060 --> 00:04:35,560
That's why I told him
He better clear it
With his dad first.
90
00:04:36,060 --> 00:04:37,060
Oh, brian.
91
00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:38,490
What?
92
00:04:38,860 --> 00:04:39,760
Do you think
He asked him?
93
00:04:40,130 --> 00:04:41,130
Well, you guys
Were sitting here.
94
00:04:41,130 --> 00:04:43,130
He didn't mention a thing
About cello lessons.
95
00:04:43,130 --> 00:04:45,130
My guess is
The kid chickened out.
96
00:04:45,130 --> 00:04:47,140
It's a shame.
It's really a shame.
97
00:04:47,140 --> 00:04:48,640
Guess it would have
Made you feel pretty good
98
00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:51,240
To give a kid like that
A little culture
And refinement.
99
00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:53,240
Oh, get real.
I got gambling debts
To pay off.
100
00:04:54,240 --> 00:04:55,750
Hey, helen,
101
00:04:55,750 --> 00:04:57,750
Did r.J. Call you
And talk about
102
00:04:57,750 --> 00:04:59,620
Takin' some, uh,
Cello lessons?
103
00:04:59,950 --> 00:05:02,290
Uh, yes, roy, I was gonna--
No, no.
104
00:05:02,290 --> 00:05:03,790
I think
It's a good idea.
105
00:05:03,790 --> 00:05:05,220
(helen)
You do?
Yeah, yeah.
106
00:05:05,590 --> 00:05:06,520
Roy, that's great.
107
00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:07,820
So when's he start?
108
00:05:07,820 --> 00:05:09,330
Uh, he can
Start tonight.
109
00:05:09,330 --> 00:05:10,960
Uh, tell him
To come here
After work.
110
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:13,430
Here? You give
The cello lessons here?
111
00:05:13,430 --> 00:05:15,430
Yeah, my landlady's
Giving me grief again.
112
00:05:15,430 --> 00:05:18,400
She says the noise
Is making her cat sterile.
113
00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,400
I wish you'd play
For my sister.
114
00:05:23,510 --> 00:05:24,770
7:00 sharp.
115
00:05:26,780 --> 00:05:29,410
Roy, you surprise me.
Cello lessons?
116
00:05:29,650 --> 00:05:30,980
I've got my reasons.
117
00:05:30,980 --> 00:05:33,480
Come here, guys.
You all gotta hear this.
Come here.
118
00:05:33,980 --> 00:05:36,120
Hey, lowell.
Lowell, get your butt
Over here.
119
00:05:36,120 --> 00:05:38,620
Well, I gotta change
The plugs on a cessna
Out here, roy.
120
00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,490
But, lowell, I have
An anecdote for you.
121
00:05:41,490 --> 00:05:44,990
Plugs, anecdote.
Plugs, anecdote.
122
00:05:44,990 --> 00:05:48,100
Ah, color me curious, roy.
123
00:05:48,100 --> 00:05:51,100
Hey, rudy, come here,
Come here. Now get this.
124
00:05:51,530 --> 00:05:54,040
When r.J. Told me
He wanted to take
Cello lessons
125
00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:55,540
I thought
I was gonna puke,
126
00:05:55,540 --> 00:05:58,710
But then
He gave me
A reason so sweet
127
00:05:58,710 --> 00:06:00,710
That it touched
This father's heart.
128
00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:01,710
And that reason was?
129
00:06:01,710 --> 00:06:02,710
"Dad, I'm horny
For helen."
130
00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:04,010
[all laughing]
131
00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:09,920
Helen is gonna try
And teach my kid the cello
132
00:06:09,920 --> 00:06:12,920
While he's hugging her leg
Like a lovesick poodle.
133
00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:14,460
[all laughing]
134
00:06:14,460 --> 00:06:17,230
[shushing]
Here she comes.
Here she comes. Watch this.
135
00:06:17,230 --> 00:06:19,730
Helen, uh,
I'm curious about, uh,
Your teaching methods.
136
00:06:20,230 --> 00:06:22,230
Do you, uh,
Lecture the students
Or do you prefer
137
00:06:22,230 --> 00:06:24,070
The hands-on technique?
138
00:06:24,070 --> 00:06:27,670
Oh, definitely the hands-on.
I like the personal contact.
139
00:06:27,670 --> 00:06:28,670
[both laughing]
140
00:06:31,170 --> 00:06:32,740
Am I missing
Something, guys?
No, no, no, no.
141
00:06:32,740 --> 00:06:35,250
No, no, no, no, no.
Lowell just made
A silly face.
142
00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:36,250
Cut it out, lowell.
143
00:06:36,750 --> 00:06:38,750
See, I think r.J.'s
Gonna get a lot
Out of this.
144
00:06:38,750 --> 00:06:41,380
He's-- he's been awful shy
About performing.
145
00:06:41,380 --> 00:06:43,890
Don't you worry, roy.
When I get through
With him,
146
00:06:43,890 --> 00:06:45,390
He'll be takin' out
That instrument
147
00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:46,360
And entertainin'
The whole family.
148
00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:47,760
[all laughing]
149
00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:55,270
Hey, roy, do you know
Where r.J. Is?
150
00:06:55,260 --> 00:06:57,170
He should've been here
20 minutes ago
For his lesson.
151
00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,500
You'll have to
Forgive him, helen,
He's always late.
152
00:06:59,500 --> 00:07:01,240
He takes after me.
153
00:07:01,740 --> 00:07:03,070
You and r.J.
Are real close,
Aren't you?
154
00:07:03,070 --> 00:07:05,070
Ever since
His mother died
155
00:07:05,070 --> 00:07:07,080
He's all I got. God!
156
00:07:07,580 --> 00:07:09,210
I love that kid.
Mmm.
157
00:07:09,210 --> 00:07:13,180
And unless I miss my guess,
Yonder cometh
The young maestro now.
158
00:07:13,180 --> 00:07:15,180
(roy)
There he is.
Here's my boy.
159
00:07:15,180 --> 00:07:17,820
Lookin' more like
His mother every day.
160
00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:21,460
[exclaiming]
Oh, she was
A handsome woman.
161
00:07:21,460 --> 00:07:23,960
Hey, sorry I'm late.
Dad, guess what?
Uh-huh?
162
00:07:24,460 --> 00:07:26,460
I bench pressed
350 pounds today.
163
00:07:26,460 --> 00:07:29,970
I could have done that,
But in my day they didn't
Have benches that heavy.
164
00:07:29,970 --> 00:07:30,970
[both laughing]
165
00:07:32,170 --> 00:07:33,670
That's a good one, dad.
166
00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:35,170
I'll have to remember
That one.
167
00:07:35,170 --> 00:07:37,510
[both grunting]
168
00:07:37,510 --> 00:07:40,510
Mom and I used to
Do that after shopping.
169
00:07:40,510 --> 00:07:42,880
Hey, why don't we go on
Out to the hangar
And get started.
170
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:45,380
Ok, but, I gotta tell you,
I don't know anything
About this.
171
00:07:45,380 --> 00:07:47,480
I mean, I don't even know
Where to put my hands.
172
00:07:47,480 --> 00:07:48,990
Oh, don't worry.
I have this
Really good book
173
00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:50,590
That shows you
All the different positions.
174
00:07:51,590 --> 00:07:53,060
[snickering]
175
00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:55,220
"Shows you
All the different positions."
176
00:07:55,220 --> 00:07:56,730
"Where to put
My hands."
177
00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:03,500
I take it
You don't read music?
178
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:05,500
Uh, no.
179
00:08:05,500 --> 00:08:08,000
Ok, I want you to know that
All of my beginning students
Are really young,
180
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:10,010
So these books are
Geared towards them.
181
00:08:10,010 --> 00:08:12,510
Please don't think
I'm insulting
Your intelligence.
182
00:08:13,010 --> 00:08:15,510
Ok. Now.
183
00:08:15,510 --> 00:08:18,010
The mama hen is
The whole note
184
00:08:18,010 --> 00:08:21,020
And all the little baby chicks
Are the 8th notes.
185
00:08:21,020 --> 00:08:22,520
Look, a rabbit.
186
00:08:27,020 --> 00:08:28,930
Good, I'm not going
Too fast for you.
187
00:08:29,790 --> 00:08:31,790
This string is the "G"
188
00:08:31,790 --> 00:08:33,300
And we will play it
189
00:08:33,300 --> 00:08:34,800
By bowing...
190
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:37,800
Just above the bridge
191
00:08:38,300 --> 00:08:39,300
Like so.
192
00:08:44,170 --> 00:08:44,970
[inaudible]
193
00:08:45,980 --> 00:08:48,480
Ok, you're gonna keep
Playing that note
194
00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:50,980
And we're gonna master
Just that one.
195
00:08:50,980 --> 00:08:52,680
Ok.
Bow.
196
00:08:53,180 --> 00:08:55,280
Joe, what do you want?
We're in the middle
Of a lesson.
197
00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:57,790
Uh, well, the guys didn't
Want you to know this,
198
00:08:57,790 --> 00:09:00,590
But the only reason r.J.'s
Takin' cello is
He's got the hots for you.
199
00:09:01,090 --> 00:09:04,090
Now, I--I just
Didn't want them laughing
At your expense.
200
00:09:06,100 --> 00:09:09,100
Oh, joe,
That's so sweet.
201
00:09:09,100 --> 00:09:11,600
Yeah, well.
I just thought
You should know.
202
00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:13,440
Oh, not you, r.J.
203
00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:17,270
The big lug's so smitten,
He's takin' lessons
Just to be near me.
204
00:09:17,270 --> 00:09:19,410
You're not upset?
Oh, no.
205
00:09:19,410 --> 00:09:22,540
But the guys might be.
You spoiled
A pretty good gag.
206
00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:27,080
I think I'm gettin' better.
207
00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:28,590
Listen, r.J.
208
00:09:28,580 --> 00:09:31,090
I know this is
A confusing time for you.
209
00:09:31,090 --> 00:09:33,590
The boy becoming a man...
210
00:09:33,590 --> 00:09:35,090
Stop that!
211
00:09:36,590 --> 00:09:38,590
The boy becoming a man.
212
00:09:38,590 --> 00:09:41,100
Your hormones are blitzing
Your brain out,
213
00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:43,600
Therefore you're drawn
To an older woman
214
00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:46,470
For her experience
And for her wisdom.
215
00:09:46,470 --> 00:09:48,970
Who could blame you?
216
00:09:48,970 --> 00:09:51,470
But you should be
Taking the cello
Because you love it,
217
00:09:51,470 --> 00:09:53,840
Not because you have
Some schoolboy crush on me.
218
00:09:54,180 --> 00:09:57,280
I don't have a crush on you.
I just told that to my dad
So I could take the lessons.
219
00:09:57,280 --> 00:10:01,280
It's ok, r.J.
You don't have to be
Embarrassed about it.
220
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:03,120
I know you're
Attracted to me.
221
00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:05,120
I'm not attracted to you,
I swear.
222
00:10:05,120 --> 00:10:06,620
I just wanna take
The lessons.
223
00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:08,490
You don't have to
Lie, honey.
224
00:10:09,830 --> 00:10:11,130
I'm not lying.
225
00:10:11,130 --> 00:10:13,130
Am I gettin'
Chunky again?
226
00:10:13,130 --> 00:10:14,630
No, you look nice.
227
00:10:14,630 --> 00:10:17,230
Is it my hair? Oh, I knew
I shouldn't have let
That lady cut it.
228
00:10:17,230 --> 00:10:19,470
No. That's not it.
Oh, so it is something.
229
00:10:19,470 --> 00:10:21,970
What is it?
Is it my personality?
230
00:10:21,970 --> 00:10:24,970
It's these clothes.
Oh, it's the accent.
231
00:10:24,970 --> 00:10:26,480
All of the above?
232
00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:27,880
Well, what is it?
Tell me!
233
00:10:28,210 --> 00:10:29,580
For crying out loud,
You tell me!
234
00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:32,550
It's not you, it's me.
I'm gay.
235
00:10:33,050 --> 00:10:35,550
Oh, thank god.
236
00:10:36,550 --> 00:10:37,550
[exclaiming]
237
00:10:45,690 --> 00:10:48,200
Uh, run that
By me again.
238
00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,200
It sounded like you said
That you were gay.
239
00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:51,700
I am. Can I learn
Another note?
240
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:53,700
In a minute.
241
00:10:53,700 --> 00:10:55,700
Are you sure
About this gay thing?
242
00:10:55,700 --> 00:10:57,210
I mean,
You're a young guy.
243
00:10:57,210 --> 00:11:01,040
Have you actually
Done anything about it yet?
244
00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:02,550
Well, not really.
I mean,
245
00:11:03,050 --> 00:11:05,050
I haven't found anybody
To be gay with.
246
00:11:06,550 --> 00:11:08,550
I think
You need someone.
247
00:11:08,550 --> 00:11:09,850
It helps.
248
00:11:09,850 --> 00:11:11,850
Well, then,
How do you know you are?
249
00:11:11,850 --> 00:11:14,860
Well, I've had
These feelings
For a long time
250
00:11:14,860 --> 00:11:17,360
And I've gone
To the library
And read a lot.
251
00:11:17,360 --> 00:11:18,860
And donahue did
A whole week on it.
252
00:11:21,500 --> 00:11:24,000
You know, you're
The first person
I've told,
253
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:26,500
But, now that
I've told you,
254
00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:28,500
I feel good.
255
00:11:28,500 --> 00:11:31,010
Matter of fact,
I feel real good.
256
00:11:31,010 --> 00:11:32,510
I--I feel free.
257
00:11:32,510 --> 00:11:34,180
I feel like
Telling everyone.
258
00:11:34,180 --> 00:11:36,180
Just came in
To say good night.
259
00:11:36,180 --> 00:11:38,210
Fay, I'm gay.
260
00:11:38,210 --> 00:11:41,450
Oh! Of course
You are, dear.
261
00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:42,950
You're young and healthy.
262
00:11:42,950 --> 00:11:44,950
Your whole life's
Ahead of you.
263
00:11:44,950 --> 00:11:46,960
Who wouldn't be gay?
264
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:48,860
Well, good night.
265
00:11:48,860 --> 00:11:52,360
That was really easy.
You know donahue said
It could be like this.
266
00:11:52,360 --> 00:11:54,160
Hey, r.J.,
Lesson's over?
267
00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:56,670
Hey, joe, guess what.
I'm gay.
268
00:11:57,670 --> 00:12:00,670
Uh, why not?
269
00:12:01,170 --> 00:12:04,140
Helen, 5 minutes ago
This kid had
A crush on you,
270
00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:05,140
Now he's gay.
271
00:12:05,140 --> 00:12:07,140
What on earth
Did you do to him?
272
00:12:08,440 --> 00:12:10,450
Excuse us,
Excuse us.
273
00:12:10,450 --> 00:12:12,450
Just gettin' a soda.
We don't wanna interrupt
274
00:12:12,450 --> 00:12:13,650
God knows what.
275
00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:15,150
You guys aren't
Interrupting anything.
276
00:12:15,150 --> 00:12:16,790
I was just tellin' joe
I'm gay.
277
00:12:16,790 --> 00:12:19,290
[exclaiming]
Check please.
Look, joe,
278
00:12:19,290 --> 00:12:21,290
I know you're desperate
To prove what a wacky guy
You are,
279
00:12:21,290 --> 00:12:23,560
But puttin' a kid
Up to this?
280
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:25,690
Joe didn't
Put him up to it,
It's true.
281
00:12:25,690 --> 00:12:28,200
R.J. Just told roy
That he was
Interested in me
282
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:30,000
So he could
Take these lessons.
Oh.
283
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,500
So you say
You're gay, huh?
284
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:34,500
Hmm. Gay, really?
285
00:12:35,500 --> 00:12:36,510
No.
286
00:12:36,510 --> 00:12:37,510
Yes.
287
00:12:38,510 --> 00:12:39,580
No.
288
00:12:39,580 --> 00:12:41,540
What do I have to do
To prove it to you?
289
00:12:41,540 --> 00:12:43,910
Nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
290
00:12:45,750 --> 00:12:48,990
R.J., have you told
Your father about this?
291
00:12:48,980 --> 00:12:51,320
No, not yet, but--
Wait right here.
292
00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:55,830
He hasn't told roy yet
That he's gay.
Please, you guys,
293
00:12:55,820 --> 00:12:58,330
You've got to let me tell him
That he's gay.
Please, oh, please,
294
00:12:58,330 --> 00:13:00,330
Oh, please, oh, please,
Oh, please.
Brian.
295
00:13:00,330 --> 00:13:02,830
Do you have any idea
What that would do
To roy?
296
00:13:02,830 --> 00:13:05,830
Yeah. Please, oh, please,
Oh, please oh, please--
297
00:13:05,830 --> 00:13:08,340
Forget it, brian.
A lot of people could
Handle this information,
298
00:13:08,840 --> 00:13:11,340
But we're talking
About roy biggins here.
299
00:13:11,340 --> 00:13:13,840
So, we've all agreed.
He can't know, ok?
300
00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:15,340
[all mumbling]
301
00:13:15,340 --> 00:13:17,310
(r.J.)
Ok, guys, I'll see you later.
I'm gonna go tell dad.
302
00:13:17,310 --> 00:13:18,650
(helen)
Whoa, whoa, whoa, r.J.
303
00:13:19,150 --> 00:13:21,650
Look, I know that sharing
This news makes you
Feel real good.
304
00:13:21,650 --> 00:13:23,990
And we're all glad for you.
And I want you to know
305
00:13:23,990 --> 00:13:26,990
That you have our support
In telling anyone you want,
306
00:13:26,990 --> 00:13:28,820
But I don't think
Your dad should be
One of them.
307
00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:32,160
But dad's my best friend.
He said I could talk to him
About anything.
308
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:34,260
Did he specifically
Mention this?
309
00:13:34,260 --> 00:13:36,770
Well, no.
310
00:13:36,770 --> 00:13:38,270
M-maybe you guys
Are right.
311
00:13:38,270 --> 00:13:39,770
I mean, I went this long
Without telling him.
312
00:13:39,770 --> 00:13:41,170
I guess, I can go
A little longer.
313
00:13:41,170 --> 00:13:42,670
Yeah, of course
You can.
314
00:13:42,670 --> 00:13:45,170
But remember,
315
00:13:45,170 --> 00:13:47,280
If you change your mind
About telling your dad,
316
00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:49,780
Please call me.
I'm available
24 hours a day.
317
00:13:49,780 --> 00:13:51,780
I'm even thinking
Of getting a beeper.
318
00:13:59,420 --> 00:14:00,420
[telephones ringing]
319
00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:02,930
(fay)
Joe?
320
00:14:02,930 --> 00:14:04,430
Uh, joe,
I was wondering,
321
00:14:04,430 --> 00:14:06,430
Would it
Be a problem if I left
A little early, today?
322
00:14:06,430 --> 00:14:08,930
I have my modern dance class
At the seniors' center.
323
00:14:09,430 --> 00:14:11,130
Oh, yeah, sure, fay.
Go ahead. Have fun.
324
00:14:11,130 --> 00:14:14,140
I--I wouldn't ask,
But if I'm late
I get stuck with mr. Hoffman
325
00:14:14,140 --> 00:14:15,640
As my partner.
326
00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:17,640
He has trouble lifting me
Over his head.
327
00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:22,640
Fay, does your dance group
Ever give recitals?
328
00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:24,810
Yes, they do.
Next time invite me.
329
00:14:24,810 --> 00:14:26,320
Will do.
330
00:14:29,150 --> 00:14:30,150
Helen, where
You going?
331
00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:33,120
I'm going to give
R.J. His lesson.
332
00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:35,960
I'm begging you,
You got to let me
Tell roy about his kid.
333
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:37,290
Absolutely not.
334
00:14:37,290 --> 00:14:38,790
Oh, but you don't
Understand.
335
00:14:38,790 --> 00:14:40,300
I got all this information
Building up inside of me.
336
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,300
I'm gonna hurt
Something internally.
337
00:14:42,300 --> 00:14:46,300
Well, if you tell him,
I'll hurt something
Externally.
338
00:14:46,300 --> 00:14:50,040
All right,
Yeah, well, he's gonna
Find out soon enough.
339
00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:52,040
Ok, what do you mean
By that?
340
00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:54,040
Word's out
All around town.
341
00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:55,380
Oh, you're exaggerating.
342
00:14:55,380 --> 00:15:00,380
Helen, r.J.'s organizing
A nantucket gay pride parade.
343
00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:03,890
If I don't tell roy,
He's gonna learn it
From a float.
344
00:15:05,290 --> 00:15:06,720
You stay out of this.
345
00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:08,990
Well, if I can't tell roy,
Can I at least take him
To the parade?
346
00:15:15,060 --> 00:15:16,060
R.J., we have to talk.
347
00:15:18,230 --> 00:15:21,740
Look, I know we told you
That it would be bad for you
To tell your father.
348
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:23,740
But do you know
What would be worse?
349
00:15:23,740 --> 00:15:26,240
Him finding out
From someone else.
350
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,240
And that is
A distinct possibility.
351
00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:31,750
Because you have been
A busy little fellow,
Haven't you?
352
00:15:31,750 --> 00:15:33,750
I'm gay and I'm proud.
353
00:15:34,750 --> 00:15:36,250
Save it for the parade.
354
00:15:36,250 --> 00:15:39,250
Oh? You know about that?
I'm the grand marshal.
355
00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:41,620
Congratulations.
356
00:15:43,130 --> 00:15:45,130
Listen, roy,
You better get in here.
357
00:15:45,630 --> 00:15:49,130
Your son has something
Pretty important to tell you
And it can't wait.
358
00:15:49,630 --> 00:15:50,630
Ok.
359
00:15:51,630 --> 00:15:53,640
Everything's gonna be
All right.
360
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:56,640
Why don't you
Take a deep breath?
That usually helps me relax.
361
00:16:04,150 --> 00:16:05,510
You can
Let it out now.
362
00:16:05,510 --> 00:16:07,120
[exhaling]
363
00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:09,620
Listen roy,
Just remember,
364
00:16:09,620 --> 00:16:12,620
No matter
What you're about to hear,
Your son loves you.
365
00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:17,030
R.J., I--I don't know
What's going on here,
366
00:16:17,030 --> 00:16:18,530
But I gotta tell you,
I'm a little scared.
367
00:16:18,530 --> 00:16:21,960
The way she's talkin',
Sounds like you got
Some bad news.
368
00:16:22,330 --> 00:16:23,830
Don't worry, son,
Your old man can take it.
369
00:16:23,830 --> 00:16:26,440
Just give it
To me straight.
Don't hold back.
370
00:16:26,440 --> 00:16:28,570
[groaning]
Dad, I'm gay.
371
00:16:29,570 --> 00:16:30,570
Dad?
372
00:16:31,070 --> 00:16:32,070
Dad!
373
00:16:33,580 --> 00:16:34,580
Dad?
374
00:16:36,780 --> 00:16:38,280
What did you say?
375
00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:40,750
I said I'm--
[groaning]
Stop right there.
376
00:16:40,750 --> 00:16:43,450
You--you go on home.
377
00:16:43,450 --> 00:16:45,960
I'm going back to the office.
This whole thing
Never happened.
378
00:16:45,950 --> 00:16:47,290
Dad, it's true.
379
00:16:47,290 --> 00:16:49,790
Look, I don't know
What kind of
Artsy-fartsy ideas
380
00:16:50,290 --> 00:16:52,290
Helen's puttin' in your head,
But you are not...
381
00:16:52,290 --> 00:16:53,300
[gasping]
Gay.
382
00:16:54,300 --> 00:16:55,800
Let me explain--
383
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:58,300
I don't want
Any explanations.
You are not...
384
00:16:58,300 --> 00:16:59,230
[gasping]
Gay.
385
00:16:59,230 --> 00:17:00,740
Am, too.
Are not.
386
00:17:00,740 --> 00:17:02,240
Am, too, damn it.
387
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:04,240
All right. All right.
388
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:06,240
We are gonna settle this
Like men.
389
00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:07,740
How?
390
00:17:07,740 --> 00:17:09,750
Gimme a minute.
I'll think of somethin'.
391
00:17:13,750 --> 00:17:16,890
You and me, one-on-one.
392
00:17:16,890 --> 00:17:17,820
What do you mean?
393
00:17:17,820 --> 00:17:21,220
If you win, you can be gay,
If not, you can't.
394
00:17:22,890 --> 00:17:24,590
Dad, this is really weird.
395
00:17:24,590 --> 00:17:27,100
Don't talk to me
About weird.
396
00:17:27,700 --> 00:17:29,730
Let's do it.
397
00:17:29,730 --> 00:17:31,030
[both grunting]
398
00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:41,710
I let you do that.
399
00:17:51,750 --> 00:17:54,720
Give it up, dad,
I'm younger than you,
I'm quicker than you--
400
00:17:59,290 --> 00:18:00,800
In your face.
401
00:18:06,230 --> 00:18:07,270
[both panting]
402
00:18:08,270 --> 00:18:10,270
Hey, guys, what's up?
403
00:18:10,270 --> 00:18:11,770
Nothing.
It's-- it's none
Of your business.
404
00:18:11,770 --> 00:18:13,280
Dad, it's-- it's ok.
They know.
405
00:18:13,780 --> 00:18:15,240
For the love of mike,
406
00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:17,110
R.J., that's just
A figure of speech.
407
00:18:17,950 --> 00:18:19,920
You told him?
408
00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:22,420
[groaning]
That just tears it.
409
00:18:22,420 --> 00:18:23,920
What happened?
He fainted.
410
00:18:24,290 --> 00:18:27,290
[groaning]
He fainted. Ah, joe...
411
00:18:27,790 --> 00:18:30,290
Brian, brian,
It's-- it's ok.
You'll get over it.
412
00:18:30,290 --> 00:18:33,630
Isn't this sort of
A strange time
To be playing basketball?
413
00:18:33,630 --> 00:18:35,400
It's a contest.
414
00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:37,900
If I win, I'm gay,
If dad wins, I'm not.
415
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:42,240
Well, have fun.
416
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:45,240
That sort of puts
A whole new slant
On the n.B.A., doesn't it?
417
00:18:51,750 --> 00:18:54,250
That's it, I win.
I'm gay!
418
00:18:57,320 --> 00:18:58,820
2 out of 3.
Huh?
419
00:18:58,820 --> 00:19:00,690
Come on, 2 out of 3.
No way.
420
00:19:00,690 --> 00:19:03,190
No way, dad.
You said if I won,
I could be gay.
421
00:19:03,190 --> 00:19:05,560
And I won
Fair and square,
So I'm gay!
422
00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:08,260
Yeah, well, I'm your father.
2 out of 3. Come on!
423
00:19:25,210 --> 00:19:26,650
[roy groaning]
424
00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:29,020
26 out of 51.
425
00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:33,520
No. It's over.
426
00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:35,020
But I'm just gettin'
Warmed up.
427
00:19:36,530 --> 00:19:37,930
Dad,
428
00:19:38,290 --> 00:19:40,300
[panting]
429
00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:42,800
We could play all night
430
00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:45,300
And even if by some miracle
You were to beat me...
431
00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:46,800
[grunting]
Yeah?
432
00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:47,800
[both panting]
433
00:19:48,300 --> 00:19:50,870
...It wouldn't
Change anything.
434
00:19:50,870 --> 00:19:53,380
Are you sure
You won't ever
Change your mind?
435
00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:54,880
Yep.
436
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:56,280
Ever?
437
00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:57,280
Ever.
438
00:19:59,550 --> 00:20:02,050
But you don't
Understand, r.J.
439
00:20:02,050 --> 00:20:04,050
I got plans for you.
440
00:20:04,050 --> 00:20:06,560
College ball, the pros.
441
00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:10,360
Those are my plans,
Too, dad.
442
00:20:11,860 --> 00:20:13,360
But you're my son.
443
00:20:13,360 --> 00:20:15,230
You're my only child.
444
00:20:17,030 --> 00:20:19,030
And I always will be.
445
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:23,540
Are you sure there's
No chance you'll...
446
00:20:23,540 --> 00:20:26,040
You'll change
Your mind, huh?
447
00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:28,540
What do you say?
Say, one in a million?
448
00:20:28,540 --> 00:20:30,050
No.
449
00:20:30,050 --> 00:20:32,050
Ok, ok, ok.
450
00:20:32,050 --> 00:20:34,550
One in a billion?
451
00:20:34,550 --> 00:20:38,050
That's next to nothin'.
It's practically nonexistent,
Come on.
452
00:20:38,050 --> 00:20:40,060
What do you say,
One in a billion?
453
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:42,060
Just so I can
Sleep at night, huh?
454
00:20:42,060 --> 00:20:43,360
Huh?
455
00:20:43,360 --> 00:20:44,860
[sighing]
456
00:20:46,860 --> 00:20:51,130
Well, ok,
Maybe one in a billion.
457
00:20:51,130 --> 00:20:54,370
I knew it.
You're not sure. Come on.
458
00:20:54,370 --> 00:20:56,870
Let's start over.
Best 2 out of 3.
459
00:21:02,110 --> 00:21:03,110
[taunting]
460
00:21:19,690 --> 00:21:22,700
Looks like roy's gonna
Fight this one
Till he drops, huh?
461
00:21:22,700 --> 00:21:25,200
Yeah, well,
It's a tough thing
462
00:21:25,700 --> 00:21:27,200
For both of 'em.
Yeah.
463
00:21:28,700 --> 00:21:30,710
[laughing]
464
00:21:30,710 --> 00:21:33,210
I wonder how you'd feel
If I told you
I was gay, huh?
465
00:21:33,210 --> 00:21:34,940
You're kiddin'.
You are, aren't you?
466
00:21:36,950 --> 00:21:38,450
Come on.
467
00:21:38,450 --> 00:21:39,950
Be serious.
Everyone knows.
468
00:21:40,450 --> 00:21:41,450
What?
469
00:21:41,450 --> 00:21:42,950
Come on, brian,
Look at the way you walk.
470
00:21:42,950 --> 00:21:46,020
Yeah, very funny.
Very funny.
471
00:21:46,020 --> 00:21:48,520
Well, I'd stay away
From the wharf
If I were you.
472
00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:50,890
Some of those guys
Have been out to sea
A pretty long time.
473
00:21:50,890 --> 00:21:52,390
Hey, listen, joe,
474
00:21:52,390 --> 00:21:55,400
If you're trying
To prove that you've got
A sense of humor,
475
00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:56,570
I'm not bitin'.
476
00:22:04,070 --> 00:22:05,010
What's wrong
With the way I walk?
477
00:22:06,410 --> 00:22:09,410
Nothin' really.
It's hardly noticeable.
478
00:22:10,780 --> 00:22:12,780
You were right, guys.
Brian does walk funny.
479
00:22:13,150 --> 00:22:13,950
What?
480
00:22:13,950 --> 00:22:15,850
[in a deeper voice]
I mean, what?
35421
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof