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1
00:00:01,520 --> 00:00:03,520
[seagulls cawing]
2
00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:11,090
Hey, mac, when are we
Gonna get this crate
Off the ground?
3
00:01:11,090 --> 00:01:13,090
Sir, I'm sorry,
But the gate just called
4
00:01:13,090 --> 00:01:16,090
And said that we're waiting
For 2 more passengers.
I'm very sorry.
5
00:01:16,090 --> 00:01:19,130
Ah! Ah!
This looks like them now.
6
00:01:19,130 --> 00:01:20,630
Excuse me, sir.
7
00:01:20,630 --> 00:01:22,630
Uh, we're pretty full up
At the moment.
8
00:01:22,630 --> 00:01:25,100
I don't think we have room
For that case of beer.
9
00:01:25,100 --> 00:01:27,500
There, put that down, normie.
10
00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:30,910
They're not going to wait
Till you drink all those.
11
00:01:30,910 --> 00:01:31,910
Are you?
12
00:01:31,910 --> 00:01:33,910
Uh, no. No.
13
00:01:33,910 --> 00:01:34,910
I didn't think so.
14
00:01:35,410 --> 00:01:36,910
You can sit right up
Here next to me.
15
00:01:36,910 --> 00:01:39,420
[chuckling]
Well, that's great.
Thank you there, skipper.
16
00:01:39,420 --> 00:01:41,420
Uh, I got the old
Shotgun position.
17
00:01:41,420 --> 00:01:44,420
Yeah. I'll keep watch
For the kamikazes for you.
18
00:01:46,060 --> 00:01:49,960
Now, you fellows promise
That stuff will be here
When I get back?
19
00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:51,290
I wouldn't worry.
20
00:01:51,290 --> 00:01:54,300
Those teamsters
Will guard that beer
With their lives.
21
00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:56,800
Oh, hey, norm.
22
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:58,300
This is probably as close
As you're gonna get
23
00:01:58,300 --> 00:02:01,300
To the actual control panel
Of an airplane.
24
00:02:01,300 --> 00:02:04,810
So I'd like to, uh, give you
A little tour of the cockpit
If you don't mind, here.
25
00:02:04,810 --> 00:02:07,810
You're probably wondering,
First, what this little dial
Is, over there.
26
00:02:07,810 --> 00:02:10,810
That's your, uh,
Ignito vector overdrive.
27
00:02:10,810 --> 00:02:13,320
Sir, uh, would you mind
Fastening your seat belt?
28
00:02:13,320 --> 00:02:15,750
[mimicking radio]
Uh, 10-4, captain.
29
00:02:17,150 --> 00:02:19,160
Can't wait to get out
On the water.
30
00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,160
Do you know how
The fishing is
Around nantucket?
31
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:24,660
Oh, yeah, I hear they're
Bitin' like pit bulls
At a mailman convention.
32
00:02:24,660 --> 00:02:26,160
[both laughing]
33
00:02:30,730 --> 00:02:32,170
That supposed to be funny?
34
00:02:32,170 --> 00:02:33,670
Guess not.
35
00:02:36,170 --> 00:02:37,170
[switch clicking]
36
00:02:37,170 --> 00:02:38,680
Don't do that.
37
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:41,680
Well, your altimeter's
Stuck at zero, there.
38
00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:43,680
We're on the ground.
39
00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:46,920
[stammering]
Oh, yeah, that checks out.
40
00:02:46,920 --> 00:02:48,920
Well, uh, I'm about ready
To take off, there.
41
00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:50,620
How about you, sky king?
42
00:02:50,620 --> 00:02:52,620
Just one more
Preflight adjustment
To make.
43
00:02:52,620 --> 00:02:53,620
What's that?
44
00:02:54,120 --> 00:02:55,630
Would you 2 guys mind
Switching seats?
45
00:02:55,630 --> 00:02:58,630
Oh, I get it,
Redistribution of payload.
46
00:02:59,130 --> 00:03:03,300
That's your, uh, r.D.P.,
Ladies and gentlemen.
47
00:03:03,300 --> 00:03:05,300
Is this for, uh,
Safety reasons?
48
00:03:05,300 --> 00:03:06,300
Oh, yeah.
49
00:03:06,300 --> 00:03:08,300
If he'd stayed up here,
I'd have killed him.
50
00:03:08,300 --> 00:03:10,240
Oh.
51
00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:13,210
So, uh, what time
Does cocktail service start?
52
00:03:13,210 --> 00:03:14,710
Oh, we don't have
Cocktail service.
53
00:03:14,710 --> 00:03:16,180
[grunting]
54
00:03:16,180 --> 00:03:17,180
You do now.
55
00:03:24,420 --> 00:03:25,420
(fay)
Announcing the arrival
56
00:03:25,420 --> 00:03:28,690
Of sandpiper air flight 48
From boston.
57
00:03:28,690 --> 00:03:31,030
And for the benefit of
Our french-canadian visitors,
58
00:03:31,030 --> 00:03:34,030
I'm afraid I don't speak
Your beautiful language.
59
00:03:36,530 --> 00:03:38,030
[phone ringing]
60
00:03:40,600 --> 00:03:43,110
[people chattering]
61
00:03:43,110 --> 00:03:44,940
[helen humming]
62
00:03:46,040 --> 00:03:48,040
[airplane whirring]
63
00:03:54,480 --> 00:03:56,690
What are you, a raccoon?
64
00:03:56,690 --> 00:03:58,120
There were spots.
65
00:03:58,120 --> 00:04:01,120
Are you insinuating that
My utensils are unclean?
66
00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:02,630
'cause I will have you know
67
00:04:02,630 --> 00:04:04,190
That I clean each
And every one of these--
68
00:04:04,190 --> 00:04:05,190
Oh, gross.
69
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:08,230
[cutlery clinking]
70
00:04:08,230 --> 00:04:10,100
What is the matter
With you?
71
00:04:10,100 --> 00:04:13,440
Well, remember I told you
That a reporter from
American flyer magazine
72
00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:14,940
Was coming
To interview me?
Right.
73
00:04:14,940 --> 00:04:15,940
It's today. It...
74
00:04:15,940 --> 00:04:16,940
It's no big deal.
75
00:04:17,410 --> 00:04:18,910
Then, how come
You have goose bumps?
76
00:04:18,910 --> 00:04:20,410
I don't have goose bumps.
77
00:04:20,410 --> 00:04:23,580
Lowell, take a look
At these honkers, man.
78
00:04:23,580 --> 00:04:27,020
Wow, they look almost
Like real geese.
79
00:04:27,020 --> 00:04:28,520
Come on, I'm just cold,
All right?
80
00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:30,520
No, it's not cold in here,
Actually, it's kind of hot.
81
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:31,520
Anybody else hot in here?
82
00:04:32,020 --> 00:04:33,020
(all)
Yeah!
83
00:04:33,020 --> 00:04:35,020
Ok, ok,
I have goose bumps.
84
00:04:35,020 --> 00:04:37,530
They're in "V" formation,
They're flying south
For the winter.
85
00:04:37,530 --> 00:04:38,530
Is everybody happy?
86
00:04:38,530 --> 00:04:40,030
[all grunting]
87
00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:42,500
Come on, this could be
Important for me.
88
00:04:42,500 --> 00:04:45,270
The last independent airline
This magazine profiled
89
00:04:45,270 --> 00:04:49,440
Went from a 2-plane operation
To a 6-plane operation
In one year.
90
00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:51,510
Really? You think
That could happen
To you, joe?
91
00:04:51,510 --> 00:04:53,010
You never know.
92
00:04:57,010 --> 00:04:58,680
(roy)
Hey, hackett.
93
00:04:58,680 --> 00:05:01,180
So, american flyer hit you up
For that article, huh?
94
00:05:01,180 --> 00:05:02,190
Yeah. Sure did.
95
00:05:02,190 --> 00:05:04,190
[laughing]
96
00:05:04,190 --> 00:05:07,190
They've been after me
For months to do an article,
But I'm too busy.
97
00:05:07,690 --> 00:05:10,190
I guess when they realized
I wouldn't be
At their beck and call
98
00:05:10,190 --> 00:05:11,700
They went
To their "B" list.
99
00:05:11,690 --> 00:05:15,060
When that didn't pan out,
They went to you.
100
00:05:15,060 --> 00:05:16,570
You are not gonna
Ruin this for me, roy.
101
00:05:16,570 --> 00:05:17,570
This is gonna be
Good publicity
102
00:05:17,570 --> 00:05:19,070
In a respected
Air magazine.
103
00:05:19,070 --> 00:05:22,070
Please, please,
Forgive me, mr. Big shot.
104
00:05:22,070 --> 00:05:24,010
I didn't mean to rain
On your parade.
105
00:05:24,010 --> 00:05:24,910
[snickering]
106
00:05:24,910 --> 00:05:26,410
Then cover your mouth
When you talk.
107
00:05:26,410 --> 00:05:28,650
You're spraying
Like a garden hose.
108
00:05:30,380 --> 00:05:31,880
[plane whirring]
109
00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:32,880
(cliff)
Uh, you know,
110
00:05:33,380 --> 00:05:34,880
I betcha if you made about,
Oh, I don't know,
111
00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:36,890
20 degree adjustment
On those trim tabs
112
00:05:36,890 --> 00:05:37,890
That baby'd settle down
On the runway
113
00:05:38,390 --> 00:05:39,390
Like a butterfly
With sore feet.
114
00:05:39,390 --> 00:05:41,190
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
115
00:05:41,190 --> 00:05:43,190
Hey, uh,
Does he talk to people
Like that all the time?
116
00:05:43,190 --> 00:05:44,690
Oh, he doesn't
Need people.
117
00:05:46,700 --> 00:05:50,200
Cliffie, let's go down
To the wharf, charter a boat.
118
00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:51,200
Hey.
119
00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:53,200
I've, uh, got a boat
For charter.
120
00:05:53,200 --> 00:05:56,040
And she's a beauty.
I'll give you
A great deal, too.
121
00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:57,210
All right,
Sounds good.
Hey.
122
00:05:57,510 --> 00:05:59,510
Of course, my family
Lives on the boat.
123
00:05:59,510 --> 00:06:01,210
But they won't
Get in your way.
124
00:06:01,210 --> 00:06:02,710
Don't mind
The little one.
125
00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:06,050
He'll probably just crawl
Right up on your lap
And fall asleep.
126
00:06:06,550 --> 00:06:09,350
At least that way,
He won't eat the bait.
127
00:06:09,350 --> 00:06:12,890
And, uh, try to ignore
The skin rash
The little guy's got.
128
00:06:12,890 --> 00:06:15,960
Uh, the clinic says
That it's not contagious.
129
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:18,960
That's good, well, uh,
We'll get back to you, uh,
There, captain nemo.
130
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:19,960
All righty.
131
00:06:20,460 --> 00:06:22,270
[chuckling]
132
00:06:22,270 --> 00:06:24,770
See you later.
Shiver your timbers, pal.
133
00:06:24,770 --> 00:06:27,770
There's one gene pool
You don't want
To take a dip in.
134
00:06:29,270 --> 00:06:31,270
Well, listen, listen,
135
00:06:31,270 --> 00:06:33,280
You guys are looking
To charter a boat,
136
00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:35,510
Try jack o'shea. Tell him
Joe hackett sent you.
137
00:06:35,510 --> 00:06:37,780
Oh, jackie o'shea, huh?
138
00:06:37,780 --> 00:06:39,780
[chuckling]
Sounds like
An irish bloke.
139
00:06:39,780 --> 00:06:41,280
I betcha we're not gonna
Have any trouble
140
00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:43,790
Getting cocktail service
On that boat.
141
00:06:44,290 --> 00:06:46,020
[humming]
142
00:06:46,020 --> 00:06:50,030
Uh, he's--he's an ok guy.
It just takes a little time
To get used to him.
143
00:06:50,030 --> 00:06:52,530
I'm about, uh,
2 years away myself.
144
00:06:56,270 --> 00:06:58,270
[airplane whirring]
145
00:06:58,770 --> 00:07:00,600
[people chattering]
146
00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:02,610
Yeah, I'm ted cobb from
American flyer magazine.
147
00:07:02,610 --> 00:07:03,570
I'm looking for joe hackett.
148
00:07:03,570 --> 00:07:05,470
Uh, that's him
Right over there.
149
00:07:05,470 --> 00:07:07,480
Oh, and in case you need it
For your article,
150
00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:08,980
My name is
Fay evelyn cochran,
151
00:07:08,980 --> 00:07:10,480
My favorite color
Is blue,
152
00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:11,980
And I was
The first stewardess
153
00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:14,480
To use
The emergency exit gesture.
154
00:07:21,260 --> 00:07:23,260
I've seen your work.
Thanks.
155
00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:27,530
Excuse me, mr. Cobb.
156
00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:30,500
I'm roy biggins,
Owner of aeromass,
157
00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:31,500
The island's
Number one airline.
158
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:33,500
Here, have an aeromass pen.
159
00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:36,010
You know, sir, the fact
That you have been overlooked
For a pulitzer prize
160
00:07:36,510 --> 00:07:40,010
Is unconscionable.
May I award you
With an aeromass mug?
161
00:07:40,010 --> 00:07:43,280
And--and, sir,
If--if you could see
Your way clear
162
00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:46,620
To mentioning my--my airline
In--in your magazine,
163
00:07:46,620 --> 00:07:48,020
[whimpering]
It would be so...
164
00:07:48,020 --> 00:07:50,750
[stammering]
Here, have
An aeromass face cloth.
165
00:07:50,750 --> 00:07:53,090
Ted, nice to meet you.
I'm--I'm joe hackett.
166
00:07:53,090 --> 00:07:54,590
Why don't we go
In my office?
167
00:07:54,590 --> 00:07:56,590
You've got some real whackos
On this island, hackett.
168
00:07:57,090 --> 00:07:58,600
Oh. So, you've met
My brother, huh?
169
00:07:58,590 --> 00:08:00,100
Is that guy your brother?
170
00:08:00,100 --> 00:08:03,370
Oh, no, that's roy.
I don't think he has
Any siblings.
171
00:08:03,370 --> 00:08:05,370
Word is, he ate 'em
In the nest.
172
00:08:06,340 --> 00:08:08,840
Uh, have a seat, ted.
173
00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:11,340
So, uh, what angle
Are you gonna take
For this article?
174
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:15,850
I mean, you have the romance
Of the "One man, one plane",
175
00:08:15,850 --> 00:08:18,350
And there's the drama
Of david versus goliath.
176
00:08:18,850 --> 00:08:20,650
I guess it just depends
On what you're looking for.
177
00:08:20,650 --> 00:08:22,480
I'm looking to fill 3 pages.
178
00:08:23,750 --> 00:08:24,590
I see.
179
00:08:24,590 --> 00:08:26,590
Now, look, hackett,
I'm not gonna kid you.
180
00:08:26,590 --> 00:08:28,090
I hate flying.
181
00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:30,590
I hate writing
For this stupid magazine.
182
00:08:30,590 --> 00:08:33,600
I'm only here because
My editor's aunt flew
On your little airline
183
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,800
And thought it would
Make a cute story.
184
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:37,200
Yeah, I think it might.
185
00:08:37,570 --> 00:08:39,570
I don't do cute.
186
00:08:39,570 --> 00:08:42,600
I never had to do cute
When I worked
For mercenary monthly.
187
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,440
Now, there was a magazine
You could sink
Your teeth into.
188
00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:49,950
You could write stories
With raw power
189
00:08:49,950 --> 00:08:52,920
That would leave the taste
Of blood in your mouth.
190
00:08:56,220 --> 00:08:57,720
But back to reality.
191
00:08:57,720 --> 00:08:59,220
Start at the beginning.
192
00:08:59,220 --> 00:09:03,690
Well, uh,
When I was a kid,
193
00:09:03,690 --> 00:09:05,160
You'll never guess
Who my hero was.
194
00:09:05,160 --> 00:09:06,560
Chuck yeager.
195
00:09:07,500 --> 00:09:09,130
Yeah! How did you know?
196
00:09:09,130 --> 00:09:10,630
I'm psychic.
197
00:09:12,670 --> 00:09:13,670
Brian, what are you
Doing here?
198
00:09:13,670 --> 00:09:15,600
You're supposed to be
On your way
To provincetown.
199
00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:17,110
Yeah, lowell had to pull
The plane in,
200
00:09:17,110 --> 00:09:18,570
There was a small leak
In the fuel line.
201
00:09:18,970 --> 00:09:20,480
Oh, uh, well, ted,
This would be good
For you to see--
202
00:09:20,980 --> 00:09:21,580
Uh, ted?
203
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:23,110
This would be good
For you to see.
204
00:09:23,110 --> 00:09:25,110
Uh, here
At sandpiper air,
205
00:09:25,110 --> 00:09:26,120
Safety is our
Number one priority.
206
00:09:26,620 --> 00:09:29,120
That's why I hired
The best mechanic
On nantucket.
207
00:09:37,990 --> 00:09:39,830
He's kind of
A mechanic savant.
208
00:09:42,330 --> 00:09:45,200
Oh, uh, ted cobb,
This is brian, my brother.
He's my other pilot.
209
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:46,540
Oh, yeah.
(brian)
Ted cobb?
210
00:09:46,540 --> 00:09:47,740
You're not the ted cobb
211
00:09:47,740 --> 00:09:49,540
Who wrote for
Mercenary monthly,
Are you?
212
00:09:49,810 --> 00:09:50,810
Yeah, I am.
213
00:09:50,810 --> 00:09:53,280
Oh, man!
I love your stuff!
214
00:09:53,780 --> 00:09:56,250
My favorite
Was a 4-part article
On the sucking chest wound.
215
00:09:56,680 --> 00:10:00,050
Oh!
Yeah, I was, uh,
Pretty proud of that.
216
00:10:00,050 --> 00:10:02,350
Oh, man! I used to
Read your magazine
From cover to cover
217
00:10:02,350 --> 00:10:04,020
When I was flying
Out of mustique.
218
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:05,520
You flew out of mustique?
219
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:07,460
I lived there for 2 years!
220
00:10:07,460 --> 00:10:09,360
(ted)
Hey, did you ever go
Drinking at basil's?
221
00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:11,360
Are you kidding me?
They named a drink
After me.
222
00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:12,700
"The traumatic
Head injury."
223
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:14,300
(brian)
That's me, yeah, yeah.
224
00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:17,600
In fact, I remember
This one time,
Princess margaret walks in
225
00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:18,600
And she needs a light
For her cigarette,
226
00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:19,940
Who knew
She smoked, right?
227
00:10:19,940 --> 00:10:21,440
So I grabbed
The tiki torch...
Ahem!
228
00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:23,440
[ted laughing]
Uh, but what am I
Going on about?
229
00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:26,340
This, uh, this article's
All about joe, right?
230
00:10:27,340 --> 00:10:28,340
Who's joe?
231
00:10:30,180 --> 00:10:31,350
Oh, right.
232
00:10:31,710 --> 00:10:34,650
Joe, joe, tell him
About the time
233
00:10:34,650 --> 00:10:36,520
You were flying
The sultan of brunei
234
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:38,520
And one of your engines blew
And you had to--
235
00:10:39,020 --> 00:10:41,020
Oh, wait a second.
That was me.
236
00:10:42,460 --> 00:10:45,860
Ok, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Tell him about the time
You were flying
237
00:10:45,860 --> 00:10:47,360
And your wings iced up
And you had to make
238
00:10:47,860 --> 00:10:48,860
An emergency landing
On lake--
Nope, nope.
239
00:10:48,860 --> 00:10:51,370
That--that was you, too.
240
00:10:51,370 --> 00:10:53,870
Oh. Wow!
What a life I've led.
241
00:10:55,670 --> 00:10:57,670
You know, ted,
It isn't often
242
00:10:57,670 --> 00:10:59,680
That I brag about
Sandpiper's on-time records,
243
00:10:59,680 --> 00:11:01,180
But I've got
Some stats here--
244
00:11:01,180 --> 00:11:02,680
Hey, uh, listen, brian,
245
00:11:02,680 --> 00:11:04,180
Tell me what outfit
Did you fly with
Out of mustique?
246
00:11:04,180 --> 00:11:05,850
Uh, iguana airlines.
247
00:11:05,850 --> 00:11:08,550
"We're ugly,
But we get you there."
248
00:11:08,550 --> 00:11:10,050
They were a nutty bunch.
249
00:11:10,050 --> 00:11:11,650
Oh, tell me about it.
Tell me about it.
250
00:11:11,650 --> 00:11:14,660
Hey, I remember this one time
I'm flying a planeload
Of swimsuit models
251
00:11:14,660 --> 00:11:16,630
Down to st. Thomas, right.
So, halfway there,
252
00:11:17,060 --> 00:11:19,060
We developed a little
Engine trouble,
So I have to ditch.
253
00:11:19,060 --> 00:11:21,060
Wait, now, slow down, slow,
I wanna get all of this.
254
00:11:21,060 --> 00:11:22,930
Ok, ok. Wait, wait, wait,
So, I ditched
255
00:11:22,930 --> 00:11:24,800
And here I am,
I'm on this deserted beach
256
00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:27,800
With these 6 gorgeous babes
Looking to me for protection.
257
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:29,310
Thank goodness,
I had some.
258
00:11:29,310 --> 00:11:31,840
[both laughing]
259
00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:34,380
I'm just gonna, uh,
Go get a cup of coffee.
260
00:11:34,380 --> 00:11:35,880
I mean, far be it
For me to tell them
261
00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:39,380
That there was a sheraton
On the other end
Of the island.
262
00:11:39,380 --> 00:11:40,880
Then I'm gonna put
A bone in my nose
263
00:11:40,880 --> 00:11:43,590
Light my hair on fire
And do the lambada
With fay.
264
00:11:43,590 --> 00:11:45,020
Good, joe. Thank you.
265
00:11:45,020 --> 00:11:46,420
A sheraton!
266
00:11:46,420 --> 00:11:47,420
[exclaims]
267
00:11:47,420 --> 00:11:48,420
I love this!
268
00:11:48,420 --> 00:11:50,560
[laughing]
269
00:11:50,930 --> 00:11:54,130
Hackett! Hackett!
Did ted say anything
About me?
270
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:57,330
Yeah, he said,
You're the sexiest man
He's ever seen.
271
00:11:59,340 --> 00:12:00,840
Really?
272
00:12:02,870 --> 00:12:04,370
How's your interview
Going?
273
00:12:04,370 --> 00:12:05,880
Oh, it's going
Along nicely
274
00:12:05,870 --> 00:12:08,380
Only, I don't seem
To be a part of it
Anymore.
275
00:12:08,380 --> 00:12:10,210
Hey, what're you 2 guys
Still doing here?
276
00:12:10,510 --> 00:12:12,480
Ah, soaking up
Some local color.
277
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:14,980
Yeah, I'm soaking up
My second right now.
278
00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:18,290
And a beautiful amber
It is, too.
279
00:12:18,290 --> 00:12:20,020
Helen, I need
An anecdote.
280
00:12:20,020 --> 00:12:22,460
Well, my friend,
You've come
To the right place.
281
00:12:23,330 --> 00:12:25,330
It was 1967, I believe--
282
00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:27,560
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Just drink your beer.
283
00:12:27,930 --> 00:12:28,730
He never shuts up.
284
00:12:28,730 --> 00:12:30,230
C-c-come on.
285
00:12:30,230 --> 00:12:33,900
Helen, help me out here.
Brian's in there
Dazzling ted
286
00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:35,400
With stories about
His flying career,
287
00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:37,410
And I can't remember
Any good stuff about me.
288
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,840
Uh, granted,
Brian is a little more
Outgoing and all,
289
00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:43,480
But I think
I'm a pretty
Interesting guy, too.
290
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:45,480
Oh, I'm sorry, joe, what?
291
00:12:45,980 --> 00:12:47,980
Never mind.
292
00:12:47,980 --> 00:12:50,990
Joe, I've got good news
And I've got bad news.
293
00:12:50,990 --> 00:12:52,990
Good news is,
The plane's fixed.
294
00:12:52,990 --> 00:12:53,990
What's the bad news?
295
00:12:53,990 --> 00:12:56,460
I think I'm possessed
By satan.
296
00:12:56,460 --> 00:12:59,390
Either that or ragweed season
Has come early.
297
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:00,400
[sneezing]
298
00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:03,900
My money's on satan.
299
00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:06,900
[sighing]
300
00:13:06,900 --> 00:13:09,410
Hey, why am I trying
To compete with brian?
301
00:13:09,910 --> 00:13:12,310
I've got my own story,
And it's a damn good one.
302
00:13:12,310 --> 00:13:14,180
I mean,
I started this airline
303
00:13:14,180 --> 00:13:17,110
With nothing but $5,000,
And my own sweat and spit.
304
00:13:17,110 --> 00:13:19,110
Joe, that's kind of
Disgusting.
305
00:13:20,180 --> 00:13:22,180
And now it's
A growing business.
306
00:13:22,180 --> 00:13:25,190
I mean, I am an
American success story.
307
00:13:25,190 --> 00:13:28,560
If ted cobb can't see that,
I'm just gonna have to
Open his eyes.
308
00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:30,130
[ted laughing]
309
00:13:30,130 --> 00:13:34,630
...By the third day,
Those girls had
Elected me king!
310
00:13:34,630 --> 00:13:37,670
Yeah, brian,
The plane's fixed,
Let's get it in the air.
311
00:13:37,670 --> 00:13:39,030
[exclaims]
312
00:13:39,030 --> 00:13:40,700
What's the magic word?
Eunuch.
313
00:13:40,700 --> 00:13:41,700
I'm out of here.
314
00:13:43,710 --> 00:13:46,210
So, uh, ted,
Why don't we go back
To my office?
315
00:13:46,210 --> 00:13:48,610
I wanna tell you the history
Of sandpiper air from day one.
316
00:13:48,610 --> 00:13:50,980
Hackett, history's
For geeks.
317
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:53,780
I'm looking for stories
With real excitement.
318
00:13:53,780 --> 00:13:56,290
Oh, well, now that
I know what you want,
Let's just go back--
319
00:13:56,290 --> 00:13:57,220
Maybe later.
320
00:13:57,220 --> 00:13:59,220
I'm gonna fly with brian
On this next flight.
321
00:13:59,220 --> 00:14:00,190
Get a good look
At the operation.
322
00:14:00,620 --> 00:14:02,120
Oh, good. Good.
323
00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:03,490
Uh, when you get back,
I'll take you to lunch,
My treat.
324
00:14:03,790 --> 00:14:05,290
Uh, sorry, joe,
No can do.
325
00:14:05,290 --> 00:14:07,300
I'm having lunch
With the bri-guy.
326
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:11,270
"The bri-guy?"
327
00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:31,950
So, therefore, the clam
Is the only bivalve
328
00:14:31,950 --> 00:14:34,220
With, uh,
An erogenous zone.
329
00:14:34,220 --> 00:14:38,230
Uh, it's located right here
Under the scumpus. See?
330
00:14:38,730 --> 00:14:39,730
[gasps]
331
00:14:39,730 --> 00:14:40,830
Quick, joe, run!
332
00:14:40,830 --> 00:14:42,330
(cliff)
Oh, look who's here!
333
00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:43,770
Hey.
Hey.
334
00:14:43,770 --> 00:14:46,270
How come you guys
Aren't out on the water yet?
It's after 1:00.
335
00:14:46,270 --> 00:14:48,270
Well, uh,
We're a lot closer
Than we were before.
336
00:14:48,770 --> 00:14:49,510
Yeah.
337
00:14:49,510 --> 00:14:50,510
[sniffing]
338
00:14:50,510 --> 00:14:52,170
I can even smell
The salt air from here.
339
00:14:52,170 --> 00:14:54,180
You know that could be
The beer nuts you smell, huh?
340
00:14:54,180 --> 00:14:55,680
Yeah, yeah.
That's what it is.
341
00:14:55,680 --> 00:14:57,680
One or the other.
I don't know.
342
00:14:57,680 --> 00:15:00,180
Well, you know,
We were on our way
To see your friend o'shea
343
00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:03,190
And, uh, we were sashaying
By this little, uh, pub
344
00:15:03,190 --> 00:15:05,690
And normie suggested
We drop in
To get directions
345
00:15:05,690 --> 00:15:08,760
And we just fell victim
To its unique charm.
346
00:15:08,760 --> 00:15:11,760
We have absolutely
No place like this
In boston.
347
00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,260
So, what do you say, norm?
348
00:15:14,260 --> 00:15:15,770
Want to go up
To the big ones?
349
00:15:15,760 --> 00:15:17,270
[grunting]
Yep.
350
00:15:17,270 --> 00:15:20,270
All right. I hear
They serve 60-ounce mugs
Down the street.
351
00:15:22,940 --> 00:15:25,940
Oh, hey, helen, look.
It's brian and that guy
From the magazine.
352
00:15:25,940 --> 00:15:27,440
What a surprise,
Let's go join them.
353
00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:29,310
Hey, wait a minute.
354
00:15:29,310 --> 00:15:31,610
You didn't wanna
Take me to lunch.
355
00:15:32,110 --> 00:15:33,620
I'm only here
So it won't look like
356
00:15:33,620 --> 00:15:36,420
You're pathetically
Tagging along after them.
357
00:15:36,420 --> 00:15:38,150
Joe, why didn't you
Just tell me the truth?
358
00:15:38,150 --> 00:15:39,120
Would you have come?
359
00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:41,620
Of course not.
I have a lunch counter.
360
00:15:42,120 --> 00:15:43,590
I don't normally
Close it at lunch
361
00:15:43,590 --> 00:15:46,460
To go to lunch.
That's why it's called
A lunch counter.
362
00:15:46,460 --> 00:15:49,300
Helen, I just want the guy
To know he's missing out
On a damn good story.
363
00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:50,800
(helen)
Yes. But this is not--
Hey, helen, look,
364
00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:52,300
It's brian and ted.
(helen)
Hi.
365
00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:53,300
Hey, guys, uh,
Do you mind
If we join you?
366
00:15:53,800 --> 00:15:55,300
Uh, no, no,
Grab a seat.
367
00:15:55,300 --> 00:15:57,810
You know, uh,
Ted, after you left,
368
00:15:57,810 --> 00:16:00,410
I thought of a pretty
Hair-raising experience
369
00:16:00,410 --> 00:16:03,150
I think might be
Just the kind of story
You're looking for.
370
00:16:03,150 --> 00:16:04,580
Finally.
371
00:16:04,580 --> 00:16:07,580
I'd just taken off
From hyannis with
A full load of passengers.
372
00:16:07,580 --> 00:16:10,090
When out of nowhere
A squall hit.
373
00:16:10,090 --> 00:16:13,060
So I told the passengers
To strap in and hang on.
374
00:16:13,490 --> 00:16:14,990
Hey, this is good.
Go on.
375
00:16:14,990 --> 00:16:17,990
Well, the thunder
Was crashing,
376
00:16:17,990 --> 00:16:20,000
Lightning's flashing
All around us.
377
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,530
My gauges were
Going haywire,
378
00:16:21,530 --> 00:16:23,530
When suddenly,
One of my engines quits.
379
00:16:23,530 --> 00:16:25,030
And you went into a spin.
380
00:16:25,030 --> 00:16:26,540
No, no, no,
I got it started again.
381
00:16:26,540 --> 00:16:28,770
But by this time,
We were in a steep dive.
382
00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,270
The ocean was rushing up
To meet us.
383
00:16:30,270 --> 00:16:31,770
So, you had to ditch.
384
00:16:31,770 --> 00:16:34,280
No. No, no, no,
I--I leveled her out
385
00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:36,780
Just as the whitecaps
Were licking
At our underbelly
386
00:16:36,780 --> 00:16:38,150
And we made it back
To nantucket.
387
00:16:38,150 --> 00:16:40,120
Where you crash-landed.
388
00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:43,120
No, we--we landed safely.
389
00:16:44,020 --> 00:16:45,520
Any fatalities?
390
00:16:46,820 --> 00:16:48,320
Multiple injuries?
391
00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:50,260
Anything?
392
00:16:53,660 --> 00:16:57,670
Well, I could have sworn
I heard one of the passengers
Say, "Dear god."
393
00:16:57,670 --> 00:16:58,670
I see.
394
00:16:58,670 --> 00:17:01,170
Will you excuse me
A second here?
Sure.
395
00:17:02,670 --> 00:17:05,640
What, the guy takes off points
'cause nobody was killed?
396
00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:07,580
Well, what are you
Doing here?
397
00:17:07,580 --> 00:17:08,580
What do you mean?
398
00:17:08,580 --> 00:17:10,580
Well, I mean, helen owns
The lunch counter,
399
00:17:10,580 --> 00:17:12,080
She doesn't have to close it
Down at lunch time
400
00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:13,010
To go out and have lunch.
401
00:17:13,420 --> 00:17:15,920
All right, all right,
All right.
402
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:17,920
I'm here to make sure
You don't swipe my story.
403
00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:20,460
I'm not trying
To swipe your story--
404
00:17:20,460 --> 00:17:21,460
This is just like you, brian,
405
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:23,090
You've always tried
To steal my thunder.
406
00:17:23,090 --> 00:17:24,390
I mean,
You're way off base, here.
407
00:17:24,390 --> 00:17:25,900
This isn't the first time
You've pulled this.
408
00:17:25,890 --> 00:17:27,700
(brian)
What are you--
What about my confirmation?
409
00:17:27,700 --> 00:17:29,700
I'm just about to kiss
The bishop's ring,
410
00:17:29,700 --> 00:17:32,730
You fall on the floor
And start making
All those noises.
411
00:17:32,730 --> 00:17:34,140
I was having
An asthma attack.
412
00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:35,500
Yeah, like that
Wasn't planned.
413
00:17:35,500 --> 00:17:37,510
Uh, for your information,
Pal,
414
00:17:38,010 --> 00:17:39,770
I just spent the whole day
Talking about you.
415
00:17:39,780 --> 00:17:41,280
To the bishop?
416
00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:43,280
Make a puppet.
417
00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:47,020
Joe, if you don't believe me,
Why don't you take a look
At ted's notes?
418
00:17:47,020 --> 00:17:48,520
They're right inside
His briefcase.
419
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:50,020
No, no.
I can't do that.
420
00:17:50,020 --> 00:17:51,020
[exclaims]
It's his personal property.
421
00:17:51,020 --> 00:17:52,520
I have no right to--
Why not?
422
00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,020
Oh, oh. Oh,
I see, I see.
423
00:17:54,020 --> 00:17:55,520
You know that
I won't look in there
424
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,030
And that way
I'll never know
What you said to him.
425
00:17:57,530 --> 00:17:59,400
(helen)
Brian.
Hey!
426
00:17:59,390 --> 00:18:02,200
Helen, you are a witness
They are officially
Out of the briefcase.
427
00:18:02,700 --> 00:18:04,200
Go ahead,
Read 'em out loud.
428
00:18:04,700 --> 00:18:06,100
With pleasure.
Go ahead.
429
00:18:06,470 --> 00:18:08,970
"Joe hackett,
Best pilot I've ever seen.
430
00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:13,510
"Cool in a crisis,
431
00:18:13,510 --> 00:18:17,080
"Taught me everything
I know about flying.
432
00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:20,580
Once turned down
An offer to sing with
The doodletown pipers?"
433
00:18:22,580 --> 00:18:23,920
They never
Offered me a job.
434
00:18:23,920 --> 00:18:24,920
Oh, I know, but if they had,
435
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:26,920
I'd like to think you'd have
Had the good taste
436
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:27,820
To turn them down.
437
00:18:27,820 --> 00:18:28,960
Oh, man.
438
00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:30,460
Brian, I--I don't know
What to say.
439
00:18:30,460 --> 00:18:32,060
I'm--
Forget it. Forget it.
440
00:18:32,060 --> 00:18:33,160
Here he comes!
441
00:18:34,660 --> 00:18:36,670
Well, guys,
I'm out of here.
442
00:18:37,170 --> 00:18:38,170
What?
443
00:18:38,170 --> 00:18:39,670
Yeah.
I just called my editor.
444
00:18:39,670 --> 00:18:42,570
I gave him an overview
Of what we had so far
And he killed the story.
445
00:18:42,570 --> 00:18:44,570
We just couldn't find
The angle
We were looking for.
446
00:18:44,570 --> 00:18:45,870
What angle was that?
447
00:18:45,870 --> 00:18:47,540
The interesting one.
So long.
448
00:18:56,850 --> 00:18:58,250
Where you going?
449
00:18:58,250 --> 00:18:59,320
Out.
450
00:19:05,460 --> 00:19:08,400
Oh, come on, norm.
I'm telling you,
It was this big.
451
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:10,800
Cliffie,
It was more like this, ok?
452
00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:13,300
Norm, I saw it
With my own eyes
And it was this big.
453
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:15,300
Sounds like you guys
Finally got some fish.
454
00:19:15,300 --> 00:19:16,300
Yeah, you bet.
455
00:19:16,300 --> 00:19:17,810
How many did you catch?
456
00:19:17,810 --> 00:19:18,810
Well, we didn't actually
Go fishing,
457
00:19:18,810 --> 00:19:21,310
We're, uh,
Talking about the size
Of the seafood platter
458
00:19:21,310 --> 00:19:22,710
Norm had
At captain andy's.
459
00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:24,410
Which was this big.
460
00:19:24,410 --> 00:19:26,180
Norm, I'm telling you,
It was this big
461
00:19:26,180 --> 00:19:29,120
And that's why
They call it
The supertanker.
462
00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:32,620
Aeromass flight 37 to boston
463
00:19:32,620 --> 00:19:35,290
Will now begin boarding
Through gate one.
464
00:19:36,290 --> 00:19:37,290
Let's go.
465
00:19:37,790 --> 00:19:39,300
I definitely want
To come back here, though.
466
00:19:39,290 --> 00:19:41,700
Yeah, yeah. Think
Next time we should
Actually go fishing?
467
00:19:41,700 --> 00:19:44,200
What?
And ruin a perfectly
Good fishing trip?
468
00:19:45,570 --> 00:19:46,940
[sighing]
469
00:19:46,940 --> 00:19:48,940
Cessna nevada, 1-2-1,
Papa-papa,
470
00:19:48,940 --> 00:19:51,710
This is tom nevers field.
Come in, over.
471
00:19:51,710 --> 00:19:53,710
Have you been able to
Contact joe yet?
472
00:19:53,710 --> 00:19:55,210
Ah, he's not answering.
473
00:19:55,210 --> 00:19:57,080
He's been up there
For 2 hours.
474
00:19:57,080 --> 00:20:00,250
That boy can be
So stubborn sometimes,
I just wanna box his ears.
475
00:20:00,250 --> 00:20:01,450
Yeah, I know
What you mean.
476
00:20:01,450 --> 00:20:02,950
And then throw him
Into the turnbuckle
477
00:20:02,950 --> 00:20:04,950
And give him
A good pile driver.
478
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:08,190
Fay!
479
00:20:08,190 --> 00:20:11,190
I'm sorry, I've been
Watching entirely
Too much wrestling.
480
00:20:14,360 --> 00:20:16,360
Cessna nevada, 1-2-1,
Papa-papa,
481
00:20:16,360 --> 00:20:18,870
This is tom nevers field.
Come in, over.
482
00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:21,340
(joe)
Tom nevers field,
483
00:20:21,340 --> 00:20:24,070
This is cessna nevada, 1-2-1,
Papa-papa, over.
484
00:20:24,070 --> 00:20:26,580
(brian)
Cessna nevada, 1-2-1,
Papa-papa,
485
00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:30,080
Can we stop using
These stupid numbers
And just go by our names?
486
00:20:30,580 --> 00:20:31,710
Roger.
487
00:20:31,710 --> 00:20:32,710
No, it's brian.
488
00:20:32,710 --> 00:20:34,120
[laughing]
489
00:20:36,450 --> 00:20:38,950
(brian)
Joe, what are you
Doing up there?
490
00:20:39,450 --> 00:20:41,460
I just needed to do
Some thinking.
491
00:20:41,460 --> 00:20:42,960
When are you coming down?
492
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,460
Helen's worried sick
About you.
493
00:20:46,700 --> 00:20:47,700
Really?
494
00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:50,700
Well, actually, she left
Over an hour ago,
495
00:20:50,700 --> 00:20:53,200
But she did say you owe her
$3.50 for breakfast
496
00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:56,710
So she was thinking
About you.
497
00:20:56,710 --> 00:20:59,210
I'm really sorry
That the article thing
Didn't work out.
498
00:20:59,210 --> 00:21:00,710
(joe)
Yeah, thanks.
499
00:21:00,710 --> 00:21:02,210
And, uh, I'm sorry
500
00:21:02,210 --> 00:21:05,210
I accused you of trying
To steal my story.
501
00:21:05,210 --> 00:21:07,950
Apology accepted, babe.
502
00:21:07,950 --> 00:21:12,450
You know, brian, I don't know
Why I was trying so hard
To prove myself to that jerk.
503
00:21:12,450 --> 00:21:13,960
I don't care
What he thinks.
504
00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:17,460
I mean, I--I may not
Have lived in all
The exotic places you have,
505
00:21:17,460 --> 00:21:18,960
And done all
The death-defying things,
506
00:21:19,460 --> 00:21:20,960
But that doesn't matter.
507
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:23,470
So, I don't make good copy.
508
00:21:23,470 --> 00:21:25,970
But I'm a damned good pilot
And I'm proud of it.
509
00:21:25,970 --> 00:21:28,470
And I'm happy with who I am,
510
00:21:28,470 --> 00:21:32,470
It's just that
Every once in a while, I...
511
00:21:32,470 --> 00:21:34,480
Now, now I'm gonna
Say something
512
00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:37,980
But you have to promise me
You won't ever
Throw this back at me,
513
00:21:37,980 --> 00:21:39,480
Or tell anyone
I ever said it.
514
00:21:41,980 --> 00:21:44,990
Sometimes I wish
I was a little more like you.
515
00:21:47,420 --> 00:21:48,420
Brian?
516
00:21:51,430 --> 00:21:52,930
(brian)
Hey, joe, I just found out
The coolest thing.
517
00:21:53,430 --> 00:21:54,930
If you turn this dial
A little bit to the left,
518
00:21:54,930 --> 00:21:57,430
I can pick up the dog races
From miami.
519
00:21:59,940 --> 00:22:02,440
I-- I'm sorry,
What did you say?
520
00:22:02,440 --> 00:22:03,940
Uh, uh, nothing, um,
521
00:22:03,940 --> 00:22:05,440
I'm heading home.
522
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:07,640
Leave a light on
For me. Out.
523
00:22:08,940 --> 00:22:10,950
[static buzzing]
524
00:22:11,450 --> 00:22:12,950
[sighing]
525
00:22:14,950 --> 00:22:17,950
Sometimes I wish
I was a little more
Like you, too.
39747
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