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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,734 --> 00:00:02,736 [Club Music] 2 00:00:03,771 --> 00:00:05,739 [Audience Laughs] 3 00:00:07,408 --> 00:00:09,877 Devin, Ebony, turn the music down. 4 00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:12,413 Save your breath Lisa, Debony can't hear you. 5 00:00:12,446 --> 00:00:14,882 Oh! Hey mom, hey dad. 6 00:00:14,915 --> 00:00:17,951 Hey nothin'! Turn that music down before my house value depreciates. 7 00:00:17,985 --> 00:00:19,387 [Audience Laughs] 8 00:00:19,420 --> 00:00:22,356 Got my house sounding like Magic City on a Tuesday. 9 00:00:23,023 --> 00:00:25,059 N-not that I'd know. 10 00:00:25,093 --> 00:00:27,928 You gonna scare away all of our good white neighbors. 11 00:00:27,961 --> 00:00:30,231 [Audience Laughs] [Music Cuts Out] 12 00:00:30,264 --> 00:00:34,668 I'm sorry, but gamer tag "Big Leech Larry Manure" cannot play anymore. Gimme this. 13 00:00:34,702 --> 00:00:35,903 [Audience Laughs] 14 00:00:35,936 --> 00:00:37,405 I was close to beating the game! 15 00:00:37,438 --> 00:00:38,939 I was close to beatin' you! 16 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:42,843 Y'all tryin' to wake the dead with that trash music? 17 00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:44,178 [Scoffs] Trash? 18 00:00:44,212 --> 00:00:46,947 This is Bianca-say's new album, "Food for a Thought". 19 00:00:46,980 --> 00:00:48,749 [Audience Laughs] 20 00:00:48,782 --> 00:00:51,619 Bianca-say? Please. Now, we had real music. 21 00:00:51,652 --> 00:00:53,421 Type of music that'd teach you how to talk to a lady. 22 00:00:53,454 --> 00:00:55,423 - Yeah, like Al B. Sure. - Mm! 23 00:00:55,456 --> 00:00:56,924 Who's Al B. Sure? 24 00:00:56,957 --> 00:00:58,259 What? You don't know Al B. Sure? 25 00:00:58,292 --> 00:01:00,328 I'll sure be damned. [Audience Laughs] 26 00:01:00,361 --> 00:01:02,430 New artists know how to talk to women. 27 00:01:02,463 --> 00:01:03,831 How can you tell? 28 00:01:03,864 --> 00:01:05,266 Can't understand half the things these mumble rappers are sayin'. 29 00:01:05,299 --> 00:01:08,669 - Can you imagine Amigos tryin' to mumble mack? - Oh! 30 00:01:08,702 --> 00:01:10,338 [Rapping] Look at. That. Bird. Like. 31 00:01:10,371 --> 00:01:11,939 [Cooing] 32 00:01:11,972 --> 00:01:13,474 Lookit. Her. There. She. 33 00:01:13,507 --> 00:01:15,143 [Cooing] 34 00:01:15,176 --> 00:01:16,644 Lookit. That. Munchkin. Right. 35 00:01:16,677 --> 00:01:19,347 Munch, munch, munch, munch, munch. 36 00:01:19,380 --> 00:01:22,483 Well it must've worked, 'cause Onset got Bardi C. 37 00:01:22,516 --> 00:01:25,153 Yeah, I think anybody with a stack of 1's got Bardi C. 38 00:01:25,186 --> 00:01:25,953 Oh! 39 00:01:25,986 --> 00:01:30,291 We had Jodeci, 112, Shai. 40 00:01:30,324 --> 00:01:31,392 - Boyz 2 Men, - Yes. 41 00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:33,127 Dru Hill, New Edition! 42 00:01:33,161 --> 00:01:35,529 Who you gonna say next, TLC? 43 00:01:35,563 --> 00:01:37,498 Boy, you better give them books some TLC. 44 00:01:37,531 --> 00:01:40,401 Before I hit you on your left eye and throw you down a waterfall. 45 00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:43,137 [Theme Music] * Woke up and my wife said to me 46 00:01:43,171 --> 00:01:45,506 * The bill collectors want their fees 47 00:01:45,539 --> 00:01:47,875 * The kids keep talkin' back to me 48 00:01:47,908 --> 00:01:49,510 * Family Time 49 00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:53,447 * Family Time, Family Time, Family Time 50 00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:58,519 [Instrumental Music] 51 00:01:59,086 --> 00:02:01,255 Oh, you should've ducked. 52 00:02:01,289 --> 00:02:04,858 Now you all laid out in Walmart with people shoppin' in yo pockets! 53 00:02:04,892 --> 00:02:07,861 [Audience Laughs] 54 00:02:07,895 --> 00:02:09,830 What the? 55 00:02:09,863 --> 00:02:12,400 - Oh, hi mom. You're so beautiful. - Mm-hmm. 56 00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:14,235 Are you ready for your amortization test? 57 00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:16,337 - I guess. - I guess? 58 00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:19,006 Devin, you inspired me to take this test. 59 00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:22,410 Studying together would be nice quality time before you go back to school. 60 00:02:22,443 --> 00:02:24,712 I mean, that sounds great and all, 61 00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:27,014 but studying just isn't really my thing. 62 00:02:27,047 --> 00:02:28,782 Oh, really? 63 00:02:28,816 --> 00:02:32,586 Did you ever stop to think that not studying is the reason you're on academic probation? 64 00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:36,224 I got it this time, mom. I'll be fine. 65 00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:39,527 All I'm sayin' is, Magic should've said something 66 00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:40,628 to LaBron before he left. 67 00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:43,197 You know Bron got abandonment issues, man. 68 00:02:43,231 --> 00:02:47,201 Remember when his hairline tried to leave, and he held it hostage at gunpoint. 69 00:02:47,235 --> 00:02:48,869 - 'Sup Lisa. - Hey, Donnie. 70 00:02:48,902 --> 00:02:50,904 - Hey, baby. - Hey. 71 00:02:50,938 --> 00:02:52,640 So how's that class for Devin? 72 00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:53,774 It's harder than I thought. 73 00:02:53,807 --> 00:02:56,644 But, you know, I'm just excited to spend time with him. 74 00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:58,446 Yeah, enjoy it, Lisa. 75 00:02:58,479 --> 00:03:01,449 One minute they all up in your nest, then the next, you gotta kick 'em out 76 00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:03,116 to see if they fall or fly. 77 00:03:03,150 --> 00:03:06,220 I kick you out of my nest everyday and you always fly back. 78 00:03:06,254 --> 00:03:08,889 That's 'cause I'm a homie pigeon. 79 00:03:08,922 --> 00:03:11,725 Get it? Homie, homing? 80 00:03:11,759 --> 00:03:14,495 Mm, yeah, you're no comedian, Donnie. Keep your day job. 81 00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:17,498 Well do you have a day job? You know what, just keep your unemployment going. 82 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:19,066 Keep it, keep it going. [Audience Laughs] 83 00:03:19,099 --> 00:03:20,934 But he does actually have a point, baby. 84 00:03:20,968 --> 00:03:24,004 You spend more time with your friends than you do with Ebony. 85 00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:26,574 Come on now, Donnie's not a friend, he's more like family. 86 00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:28,242 That's right. Come on Lisa, you know me, 87 00:03:28,276 --> 00:03:30,077 you're more like kissing cousins anyway. 88 00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:32,580 The, the kind that just met at the barbecue though, 89 00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:34,948 we didn't know each other our whole life. [Audience Laughing] 90 00:03:34,982 --> 00:03:37,951 Keep it up. You about to be missing cousins. [Audience Laughs] 91 00:03:37,985 --> 00:03:39,820 Yeah. 92 00:03:39,853 --> 00:03:41,655 And bring my platter back, Hamburglar. 93 00:03:41,689 --> 00:03:44,091 [Audience Laughs] 94 00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:46,427 But seriously Tony, just 95 00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:48,329 do something with Ebony while she's here. 96 00:03:48,362 --> 00:03:49,630 - Spend time with her. - I do. 97 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,999 Me and Ebony do all type of stuff together. 98 00:03:52,032 --> 00:03:54,968 - Hey mom, hey dad. - Hey, baby. 99 00:03:56,304 --> 00:03:57,805 Where's the ham? 100 00:03:57,838 --> 00:03:59,773 Hey baby, let me ask you a question. 101 00:03:59,807 --> 00:04:02,776 Do you think that you and your dad spend enough time together? 102 00:04:02,810 --> 00:04:04,111 Tell her, princess. 103 00:04:04,144 --> 00:04:05,713 - No. - Wha? 104 00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:07,448 Look dad, I know you work hard 105 00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:10,117 to be able to send me and Devin to college, well, 106 00:04:10,150 --> 00:04:12,886 Devin twice, but it's okay, I'm used to it. 107 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,355 Okay, okay, how 'bout this? 108 00:04:14,388 --> 00:04:17,358 Tomorrow, 12 noon, me and you 109 00:04:17,391 --> 00:04:19,126 daddy-daughter surprise day. 110 00:04:19,159 --> 00:04:21,128 Okay, so that mean's you'll wing it. 111 00:04:21,161 --> 00:04:23,163 Yeah, see? We bonding already. [Audience Laughs] 112 00:04:23,196 --> 00:04:26,166 [Instrumental Music] 113 00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:32,473 Hey ma. 114 00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:36,377 Ba, baby! You can't just be sneakin' up on people like that. 115 00:04:36,410 --> 00:04:37,878 Mom, what're you looking at? 116 00:04:37,911 --> 00:04:40,481 Uh, oh, it's just, an adult film. 117 00:04:40,514 --> 00:04:42,483 Mom, come on, I know what this is. 118 00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:46,887 Wha, I'm tellin' you, it's a shake them cakes compilation. 119 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,922 Mom, every mother goes through this 120 00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:52,393 phase of motherhood, it's okay, it's natural. 121 00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:53,494 Okay, fine. 122 00:04:53,527 --> 00:04:56,163 You know, I'm studying so I can show Devin up in 123 00:04:56,196 --> 00:04:58,399 class so he'll feel like a slacker. 124 00:04:58,432 --> 00:05:00,334 Feel like, you know, it'll make him want to study with me. 125 00:05:00,368 --> 00:05:03,737 Oh, mom, outsmarting Devin is so easy, it's hard. 126 00:05:03,771 --> 00:05:05,105 He's smarter than you think. 127 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:08,008 No, I, I know. But I just don't think he's fully applying himself. 128 00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:10,678 Yeah, we should be worried if Devin quits school, I mean, 129 00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:12,680 the fact that he's still trying should tell you something. 130 00:05:12,713 --> 00:05:15,383 Aw, my baby's so smart. 131 00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:16,784 You ready for Daddy-Daughter day? 132 00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:18,852 Yeah, but I have no idea what we're doing. 133 00:05:18,886 --> 00:05:21,054 Yeah, he probably doesn't either. 134 00:05:21,088 --> 00:05:24,124 But, I'm just happy you two are making new memories. 135 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:26,927 All my memories of dad now include him yelling or 136 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:30,431 passing the gas, then there was one time he yelled because he couldn't pass gas. 137 00:05:30,464 --> 00:05:32,299 Oh. [Chuckles] 138 00:05:33,066 --> 00:05:35,603 Well it's 12:15, so he should be home any minute. 139 00:05:35,636 --> 00:05:37,104 [Phone Vibrating] 140 00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:38,772 - Oh, it's dad now. - Oh. 141 00:05:38,806 --> 00:05:40,541 Hello? 142 00:05:40,574 --> 00:05:42,209 Oh, hey dad. 143 00:05:42,242 --> 00:05:44,044 Oh, a last minute meeting? 144 00:05:44,077 --> 00:05:45,713 Yeah, well what time will you- 145 00:05:45,746 --> 00:05:47,648 Oh. Another time. 146 00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:49,249 Yeah, that's fine. 147 00:05:49,282 --> 00:05:51,485 Okay, love you too. 148 00:05:51,519 --> 00:05:52,486 [Sighs] 149 00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:55,122 Oh, Ebony, I'm sorry. 150 00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:58,926 - Your father's just- - No, no, it's, it's fine mom, I knew this was gonna happen. 151 00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:01,395 You know he's gonna make it up to you. 152 00:06:01,429 --> 00:06:02,896 Ebony? [ Audience "Aww's"] 153 00:06:02,930 --> 00:06:05,933 [Instrumental Music] 154 00:06:07,635 --> 00:06:09,069 [Instrumental Music] 155 00:06:09,102 --> 00:06:12,239 Now where is that sandwich that I hid from Donnie? 156 00:06:12,272 --> 00:06:15,342 I mean, just knew he wouldn't find it. 157 00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,911 That boy can sniff out any damn thing. Damn it, Donnie. 158 00:06:17,945 --> 00:06:20,013 [Screaming] Oh! 159 00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:21,649 What in the Thin Line? 160 00:06:21,682 --> 00:06:23,183 Where have you been, Tony? 161 00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:24,518 - I had a- - You're two hours late. 162 00:06:24,552 --> 00:06:26,687 I'm sorry, I had a last minute client. 163 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,322 Okay? We had to work on a very important project, I couldn't cancel. 164 00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:32,693 Yeah, well, aren't you forgetting something today? 165 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:35,195 Happy anniversary, baby. [Audience Laughs] 166 00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:37,364 You carry around a bracelet every day? 167 00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:38,499 Hell yeah. 168 00:06:38,532 --> 00:06:40,267 Ever since I forgot your anniversary and you had me 169 00:06:40,300 --> 00:06:42,536 sleeping on more couches than a runaway foster kid. 170 00:06:43,303 --> 00:06:46,173 You know, let me be very clear, I could care less about any of that. 171 00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:49,042 Okay? But your daughter, Ebony, 172 00:06:49,076 --> 00:06:50,544 you had a date with her today. 173 00:06:50,578 --> 00:06:52,279 I know, I called her, she said she was fine. 174 00:06:52,312 --> 00:06:55,282 She has not come out of her room since you hung up. 175 00:06:55,315 --> 00:06:56,717 [Exhales] 176 00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:58,218 You know, I honestly didn't think she would mind. 177 00:06:58,251 --> 00:06:59,386 I didn't think she wanted to hang out with me. 178 00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:00,688 Honey, why would you think that? 179 00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:02,656 She adores you. 180 00:07:02,690 --> 00:07:04,357 Remember the good times? 181 00:07:04,391 --> 00:07:05,959 Hell yeah I remember good times. 182 00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:08,161 Penny gettin' burnt by that iron, that scarred me for life. 183 00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:11,064 [Audience Laughs] Tony, stop playin', you know what I mean. 184 00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:12,466 'Course I do. 185 00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:14,902 I mean we used to play video games, we used to 186 00:07:14,935 --> 00:07:16,970 watch scary movies. 187 00:07:17,004 --> 00:07:18,405 - We used to have little tea parties. - Yeah. 188 00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,207 I'd even dress up with her. [Both Laughing] 189 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:21,809 You got a little bit too into that. 190 00:07:21,842 --> 00:07:24,978 I remember you bein' in the tub, shaving your legs. 191 00:07:25,012 --> 00:07:26,547 Oh by the way, can I get my razors back? 192 00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:28,081 [Tony Chuckles] 193 00:07:28,381 --> 00:07:29,917 You uh, you right Lisa, you right. 194 00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:31,251 You know what? I, I think I'll 195 00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:32,920 I'ma find a way to make it up to her. 196 00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:34,888 You know what? I will make it up to her, and I'ma do it right now. 197 00:07:34,922 --> 00:07:36,824 [Instrumental Music] 198 00:07:36,857 --> 00:07:39,793 [Tony] Ebony! Ebony! 199 00:07:42,863 --> 00:07:46,099 Okay, first of all, I apologize for standing you up. 200 00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:48,401 But all of that changes now, okay? 201 00:07:48,435 --> 00:07:51,204 You ready for Daddy-Daughter day? 202 00:07:51,238 --> 00:07:53,206 [Chuckling] All right! 203 00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:54,708 Okay, first up, juggling. 204 00:07:54,742 --> 00:07:55,776 - Come on, remember this? Remember how e used to do this? - No, no, no. 205 00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:56,677 - All the time. - No, uh-uh. 206 00:07:56,710 --> 00:07:57,945 Okay, alright, just throw it. 207 00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:00,914 [Explosions from TV] 208 00:08:01,414 --> 00:08:03,917 [Tony Cackling] 209 00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:06,286 Yeah, yeah, yeah! 210 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,354 [Tony Laughing] 211 00:08:07,387 --> 00:08:08,789 You wanna play a game? No! 212 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:11,792 [Screaming, Moaning from TV] 213 00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:17,064 [Ebony Screams] 214 00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:21,468 [Woman Screams] 215 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,337 [Whimsical Music] 216 00:08:34,815 --> 00:08:36,617 [Audience Laughs] 217 00:08:40,420 --> 00:08:42,222 You nervous about taking the test? 218 00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:44,424 When you retake as many tests as I have, 219 00:08:44,457 --> 00:08:45,492 you become a pro. 220 00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:48,962 Ah, that explains academic pro-bation. 221 00:08:48,996 --> 00:08:49,663 [Lisa Laughs] 222 00:08:49,697 --> 00:08:52,532 - Touché. You ready? - Eh... 223 00:08:53,801 --> 00:08:54,768 [Snoring] 224 00:08:54,802 --> 00:08:57,571 Devin, you done? 225 00:08:57,605 --> 00:08:58,271 Devin! 226 00:08:58,305 --> 00:09:00,240 [Gasps] No, don't stop, Ri Ri. 227 00:09:00,273 --> 00:09:01,274 Devin! 228 00:09:01,308 --> 00:09:03,844 Please don't stop the music. [Audience Laughs] 229 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:06,847 Mm-hmm. Let's check these scores. 230 00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:10,017 Ooh, ho, wow. 231 00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:12,152 Okay, now don't be too hard on yourself, honey. 232 00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:13,854 I, I didn't want to tell you, but, 233 00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:17,024 you know, I did a little extra studying, and I barely passed, so. 234 00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:19,359 That's why we gotta build better study habits. 235 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:22,195 How bad is it? You get, you get a zero? 236 00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:23,631 Two, actually. 237 00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:26,366 It's not that big of a deal, though. 238 00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:29,369 Wha... one hundred percent?! 239 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:32,505 Congrats baby! That is amazing! 240 00:09:32,539 --> 00:09:34,507 You did say two zeroes. 241 00:09:34,541 --> 00:09:36,476 What'd you get mom, two zeroes too? 242 00:09:36,509 --> 00:09:38,311 Uh... 243 00:09:38,345 --> 00:09:40,513 - Ugh. - Hmm! 244 00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:42,816 No, just... just one. 245 00:09:42,850 --> 00:09:44,985 Yeah, 60%, Mom. It looks 246 00:09:45,018 --> 00:09:47,587 like you got my old study habits. 247 00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:51,558 I mean ah I don't I don't know what happened. I I did, I studied, okay. 248 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,393 - I studied day, and night. And I... - It's okay. 249 00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:56,396 - And I-- - It's okay. It's it's okay, Mom. Relax, relax. 250 00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:59,232 - Breathe in...Breathe out. [Lisa inhales and exhales] 251 00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:01,334 You stress yourself out too much. 252 00:10:01,368 --> 00:10:04,337 [Sighs] Baby ah you know I never thought I'd say this but a... 253 00:10:04,371 --> 00:10:06,239 will you teach me your ways? 254 00:10:06,907 --> 00:10:08,575 The path is long and hard, 255 00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:11,544 and it won't be easy. You sure you're ready? 256 00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:14,314 Teach me, sensei. 257 00:10:14,347 --> 00:10:15,415 Teach me. 258 00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:16,416 [Audience laughter] 259 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:20,954 [Instrumental Music] 260 00:10:21,254 --> 00:10:22,422 Ooh! 261 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:24,191 [Audience laughter] 262 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:26,226 Ah deh...okay. 263 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:28,228 [Lisa gags] 264 00:10:28,595 --> 00:10:30,463 [Audience laughter] 265 00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:35,635 Aaah! 266 00:10:45,545 --> 00:10:46,947 [Music sting] 267 00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:51,885 [Instrumental Music] 268 00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:55,088 [Audience laughter] 269 00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:57,624 [Audience laughter] 270 00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:02,796 [Floor creaks] 271 00:11:03,263 --> 00:11:04,564 [Audience bellows] 272 00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:09,770 Aah! 273 00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:11,371 Ahaah! 274 00:11:11,404 --> 00:11:14,074 Mm hm. I see my Donnie trap worked. 275 00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:16,543 What the hell is wrong wit you, man. Why would you do somethin' like this? 276 00:11:16,576 --> 00:11:18,946 Because last time you stole a whole ham. 277 00:11:19,446 --> 00:11:21,949 Ah, what would you do if your kids reached in here, man? 278 00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:25,652 Chop they arm off and parade it around the city to warn the other moochers. 279 00:11:26,353 --> 00:11:29,222 You ain't even supposed to be here. Don't you have some kind of daddy/daughter day thang. 280 00:11:29,256 --> 00:11:31,058 Nah, man. It's been a disaster. 281 00:11:31,091 --> 00:11:33,961 I tried to play video games with her but she's a sore looser. 282 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:37,497 I've played wit chu Tony. You're a sore winner. 283 00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:39,432 May-- she don't even like video games. 284 00:11:39,466 --> 00:11:42,135 Yeah I know. So then I thought I'd switch things up. 285 00:11:42,169 --> 00:11:44,437 We could watch a movie. So I put on that 286 00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:49,076 interspecies love story between vampires and werewolves. 287 00:11:49,109 --> 00:11:50,310 Twilight? 288 00:11:50,343 --> 00:11:53,446 Nah, "Blood Sucking WerePires from Mars". 289 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,983 Let's just say she probably won't be sleepin well for a few weeks. 290 00:11:56,016 --> 00:11:57,951 You gotta do somethin' that she likes, Tone. 291 00:11:57,985 --> 00:12:00,788 Duh. So... I set up a little tea party. 292 00:12:00,821 --> 00:12:02,089 Man, she used to love those. 293 00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:03,656 Yeah, when she was 4. 294 00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:07,961 [Groans] What are you gonna do when she turns 21? Take her to Chaz's Cheese? 295 00:12:07,995 --> 00:12:10,197 I didn't know things were this bad between me and her. 296 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:13,466 Look, you just gotta do stuff that she likes, man. Like... 297 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,335 her favorite movie is The Notebook. 298 00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:18,638 Ah, her favorite game to play is Dance Dance Revolution. And her 299 00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:20,908 favorite artists is Bianca-say. 300 00:12:21,174 --> 00:12:23,143 How do you know so much about Ebony? 301 00:12:23,676 --> 00:12:26,213 Not a good time to tell you this, man. But a when you at work all day, 302 00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:29,116 I come over here and I wrap my lips around [Bottles rattle] 303 00:12:29,149 --> 00:12:31,852 - Wrap your lips around what? - Aaah! 304 00:12:31,885 --> 00:12:34,487 Aah! the food, Tone. 305 00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:36,556 The food! [Sighs] 306 00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:38,325 Like yesterday's ham. 307 00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:39,893 Not Lisa! 308 00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:44,731 My point is...I spend a lot of time over here and I listen to Ebony when she talks. 309 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,800 And she's been talkin' about goin' to that... 310 00:12:46,834 --> 00:12:49,169 aah! Bianca-say concert tonight. 311 00:12:49,202 --> 00:12:51,839 Bianca-say? I'm not a big fan of Bianca-say. 312 00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:54,474 You better watch that, man. that beehive be listenin'. 313 00:12:54,507 --> 00:12:56,109 [Audience laughter] 314 00:12:56,143 --> 00:12:59,512 Also, it's not about you. It's about her. All you gotta do is be there for her. 315 00:12:59,546 --> 00:13:00,647 [Audience laughter] 316 00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:01,915 - You know what, Donnie. You right. [Donnie groans] 317 00:13:01,949 --> 00:13:04,484 I'm gonna see if I can get some tickets to that concert tonight. 318 00:13:04,517 --> 00:13:06,219 You get the key to this as weh-- 319 00:13:06,253 --> 00:13:07,254 [Audience laughter] 320 00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:08,889 All sold out. 321 00:13:08,922 --> 00:13:11,058 But you know what? There still might be a way. 322 00:13:11,424 --> 00:13:13,360 Well, I love a happy endin'. 323 00:13:13,393 --> 00:13:14,461 [Audience laughter] 324 00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:17,530 You know what Donnie? You've earned your food today. 325 00:13:17,564 --> 00:13:19,066 [Sigh of relief] 326 00:13:19,099 --> 00:13:22,602 You know you coulda got your arm out earlier just by lettin' go of the food. 327 00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:26,006 Please, man. I've been thinkin' about Lisa's yams all day. 328 00:13:26,039 --> 00:13:26,874 [Audience laughter] 329 00:13:26,907 --> 00:13:30,743 Hey, man. These yams...that she cooked. 330 00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:31,945 Eh huh, yeah. 331 00:13:31,979 --> 00:13:34,714 [Instrumental Music] 332 00:13:34,747 --> 00:13:39,219 Right, and I completely forgot that I had made plans with my daughter a little 333 00:13:39,252 --> 00:13:41,121 daddy-daughter day. 334 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,423 Bruh...oh you, oh you have a daughter too? 335 00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:44,925 Daughters? 336 00:13:45,392 --> 00:13:47,027 You have 11 girls?! 337 00:13:47,060 --> 00:13:48,996 Ah hah, wow! 338 00:13:49,296 --> 00:13:51,764 You wife must-- No, ah yeah! No, no I get it. 339 00:13:51,798 --> 00:13:54,902 I get it, cause you kept tryin' for that boy, huh? 340 00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:56,803 Let me tell ya somethin'. I have a son. 341 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,205 Don't try that hard. 342 00:13:58,238 --> 00:13:59,472 [Audience laugher] [Tony mumbling] 343 00:13:59,907 --> 00:14:01,909 [Laughter] Just, ah, okay. 344 00:14:01,942 --> 00:14:04,211 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I was jokin'. Listen um... 345 00:14:04,244 --> 00:14:06,579 Thank you again for the tickets. I'm a pick 'em up right away. 346 00:14:06,613 --> 00:14:08,515 Alright. I'll see you soon. 347 00:14:11,118 --> 00:14:12,352 What the--? 348 00:14:13,253 --> 00:14:14,754 Devin, what happened to you? 349 00:14:14,787 --> 00:14:18,291 I forgot to deactivate the Uncle Donnie trap before openin' up the fridge. 350 00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:19,759 Hey, is that my hat? 351 00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:22,595 Sure is, and what was it doin' in the man cave? 352 00:14:22,629 --> 00:14:25,332 I came down here to meditate so I can study. 353 00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:26,333 Can I get it back? 354 00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,135 Nope, finders, keepers. 355 00:14:28,168 --> 00:14:32,105 And answer me this. Why were you meditating in the man cave when you got your own room, boy? 356 00:14:32,139 --> 00:14:33,640 That's messed up, Dad. 357 00:14:33,673 --> 00:14:37,144 I was in here hidin' our from Mom. You know she doesn't take stress well. 358 00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:40,513 - And I knew the man cave was the last place she would check. - Mm hm. 359 00:14:40,813 --> 00:14:42,015 Let me ask you a question. 360 00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:44,351 - What's up, Dad? - I just got these tickets... 361 00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:47,120 for Bianca-say live in concert tonight! 362 00:14:47,154 --> 00:14:48,922 And I'm a take Ebony. She gonna love that, right? 363 00:14:48,956 --> 00:14:52,125 Oh, definitely. That's her favorite artist of all time. 364 00:14:52,159 --> 00:14:53,793 Yeah, I knew that. I knew that. 365 00:14:53,826 --> 00:14:57,464 Yeah ah after I bailed on her though, I knew I had to make a grand gesture. 366 00:14:57,497 --> 00:15:02,135 Hm...you know Dad, how come you ain't never did anything like this for me before? 367 00:15:02,169 --> 00:15:03,270 Like what? 368 00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:06,773 Get me tickets to go see my favorite artist. 369 00:15:06,806 --> 00:15:09,209 Because your favorite artist changes every month. 370 00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:11,478 Last month it was 'Lil XYZ. 371 00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:13,046 Now it's Blueface. 372 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:14,447 Let me ask you this. 373 00:15:14,481 --> 00:15:18,718 Why is it that these rappers nowadays have such dumbass names? 374 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,621 You think the names in your era were better? 375 00:15:21,654 --> 00:15:24,057 I mean, what was the obsession with Ice? 376 00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:27,860 Ice Cube, Ice-T, and Vanilla Ice! 377 00:15:27,894 --> 00:15:29,396 Yeah, you got a point there. 378 00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:33,333 I'm just sayin' Dad, I'm in college too. And a studyin' with Mom today was 379 00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:35,168 really fun. 380 00:15:35,202 --> 00:15:39,472 You know, I was just wonderin' when was the last time me and you did something cool together? 381 00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:41,408 Okay, now I'm startin' to feel like a bad parent. 382 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:44,644 No, you're not a bad parent. You're a great parent. 383 00:15:44,677 --> 00:15:48,048 Not as good as Mom, but you are a dope Dad. 384 00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:49,549 Thanks? 385 00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:51,484 Alright ah I'll tell you what. 386 00:15:51,518 --> 00:15:54,821 After this concert, we'll have dinner and figure out somethin' for you and I to do. 387 00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:56,189 Mm, just the two of us. 388 00:15:56,223 --> 00:15:57,924 That sounds good. 389 00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,359 - You know Dad... - Hm? 390 00:15:59,392 --> 00:16:02,095 kids don't say this but as kids, 391 00:16:02,129 --> 00:16:05,698 we get to watch our parents grow up and get older too and 392 00:16:05,732 --> 00:16:08,368 I would like to make plenty more memories wit chu before I have 393 00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:09,736 any kids of my own. 394 00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:11,704 Kids a your own? Who you done got pregnant? 395 00:16:11,738 --> 00:16:13,040 Is it Tina from up the street? 396 00:16:13,073 --> 00:16:15,108 You know what? I'm a go study with Mom. 397 00:16:15,142 --> 00:16:16,176 She's less mess. 398 00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:17,444 Yeah, you do that. 399 00:16:17,744 --> 00:16:19,512 I had to get dressed anyways. 400 00:16:19,546 --> 00:16:21,748 [Instrumental Music] 401 00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:24,751 - You ready, Mom? - [Sighs] I am. 402 00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,920 Yes! Yes, 100%! 403 00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:29,222 Oh congrats, Mom. 404 00:16:29,256 --> 00:16:33,060 [Deep inhale] Baby, I mean was wrong about your unusual 405 00:16:33,093 --> 00:16:34,061 study methods. 406 00:16:34,094 --> 00:16:36,696 I learned in class that will power runs out. 407 00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:38,198 It's based on glucose. 408 00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:40,900 So if I have to use will power to study, I indulge in 409 00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:42,902 something that doesn't take will power, 410 00:16:42,935 --> 00:16:45,872 and add sugar. It's not healthy, but it works. 411 00:16:45,905 --> 00:16:47,440 That's very insightful. 412 00:16:47,474 --> 00:16:49,642 Now, what about the sushi? 413 00:16:50,077 --> 00:16:53,413 A lot of seafoods like salmon and even octopus, 414 00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:55,915 they have Omega 3's. It's great brain food. 415 00:16:55,948 --> 00:16:57,650 Wow. Baby, I'm impressed. 416 00:16:57,684 --> 00:16:59,886 Okay so wait, what does reading upside down do? 417 00:16:59,919 --> 00:17:02,422 Oh, that was nothin'. I was just messin' wit cha. 418 00:17:02,455 --> 00:17:04,757 Really? Oh, that that's what we do? 419 00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:06,393 Mm hm. 420 00:17:06,426 --> 00:17:10,163 Wow baby, I'm just I I really didn't realize how much you've matured and you've 421 00:17:10,197 --> 00:17:11,431 grown. 422 00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:14,434 I do think academic probation, I think you learned a lesson. 423 00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:16,936 Yeah, I wanted to show you how much I've changed and to trust 424 00:17:16,969 --> 00:17:18,671 that I will never let it happen again. 425 00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:21,941 Yeah. Well as long as you stay off of real probation, 426 00:17:21,974 --> 00:17:24,111 - ...we're good. - No doubt. 427 00:17:24,844 --> 00:17:27,347 [Audience laughter] 428 00:17:28,315 --> 00:17:30,783 What...in the world? 429 00:17:30,817 --> 00:17:32,519 Please don't suck my blood, WerePire? 430 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,987 Wha what...what is goin' on? 431 00:17:35,021 --> 00:17:37,157 I'm sorry, Mom. I'm hiding from Dad. 432 00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:39,459 Ah, you do realize he lives here. 433 00:17:39,492 --> 00:17:41,928 Probably not the best place to hide. 434 00:17:41,961 --> 00:17:44,664 That bad, huh? Got you lookin' like Emaciated Gray. 435 00:17:44,697 --> 00:17:46,666 [Audience laughter] 436 00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:50,870 Oh Tony, I think Ebony has something to say to you. 437 00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:53,806 You wanna tell me why she dressed like Mary J. Blind? 438 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:54,774 [Audience laughter] 439 00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:56,343 Waz up, baby? 440 00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:59,879 Well Dady, I'll always be your baby girl but I'm not a little girl anymore. 441 00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:02,815 And I know we don't like the same things so 442 00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,317 you can stop trying so hard. 443 00:18:04,351 --> 00:18:05,552 Okay but let me make it up to you. 444 00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:08,321 No, Dad. I really appreciate you trying. It's okay. 445 00:18:08,355 --> 00:18:11,558 Alright. If you don't wanna go to the Bianca-say concert, that's fine. 446 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:15,061 Up...yeah, right. The tickets are sold out. I checked. 447 00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:18,465 [Gasps] Oh my God, Daddy. You couldn't have! 448 00:18:18,498 --> 00:18:19,966 But how? 449 00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:23,570 Well that client I had to stay late for, turns out he was the promoter. 450 00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:26,706 He realized the sacrifice I made and he tried to make it up to me. 451 00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:28,341 So we gonna go or what? 452 00:18:28,375 --> 00:18:31,711 Yeah but one thing. You're not wearing that. 453 00:18:31,744 --> 00:18:35,114 What's wrong with what I got on? I'm sharper than Lori's teeth. 454 00:18:35,848 --> 00:18:37,049 Alright fine, I'll change. 455 00:18:37,083 --> 00:18:39,252 Thing got me sweatin' so bad, I feel like my body's cryin'. 456 00:18:39,286 --> 00:18:40,920 [Lisa laughs] 457 00:18:41,388 --> 00:18:44,857 [Instrumental Music] 458 00:18:44,891 --> 00:18:46,559 Eh...what? 459 00:18:46,593 --> 00:18:48,060 I raided Devin's closet. 460 00:18:48,094 --> 00:18:50,197 You dressed like Big Ol' Yachty, Dad. 461 00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:51,564 You're fine. 462 00:18:51,864 --> 00:18:55,368 [Instrumental Music] 463 00:18:55,402 --> 00:18:57,270 My neck's startin' to itch. 464 00:18:58,538 --> 00:19:02,175 [Trip-Hop Music] 465 00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:04,211 Devin can you please turn down this music, honey? 466 00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:05,178 Why? 467 00:19:05,212 --> 00:19:06,879 Because the dinner table isn't for dancing. 468 00:19:06,913 --> 00:19:08,881 Ah, this Bianca-say ain't that bad. 469 00:19:08,915 --> 00:19:11,684 Now these dance moves y'all got nowadays, now those are whack! 470 00:19:11,718 --> 00:19:12,619 [Devin and Ebony] What!? 471 00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:13,853 Oh yeah, yeah. What what's this one here? 472 00:19:13,886 --> 00:19:15,355 - This this this thing here. What's this? - Dad... 473 00:19:15,388 --> 00:19:16,756 Dad, you're doin' it wrong. 474 00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:19,292 You look like a penguin tryin' to take flight. 475 00:19:20,059 --> 00:19:22,729 Well how lame is the Running Man? Like who 476 00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:24,797 - ...what's this? - Girl, please. The Runnin' Man 477 00:19:24,831 --> 00:19:27,767 is responsible for the freedom of a lot of our ancestors. Why you trippin'? 478 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:28,868 [Lisa] Okay! 479 00:19:28,901 --> 00:19:29,769 - Yeah, that's right. Sell it, - Everybody was... 480 00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:30,570 - baby! - ...doin' that Runnin' Man. 481 00:19:30,603 --> 00:19:32,205 What is this? This is one-legged 482 00:19:32,239 --> 00:19:33,406 - This. - [Donnie] Yeah. 483 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,308 You're tryin' to stomp out roaches or somethin'. 484 00:19:35,342 --> 00:19:37,477 I mean it's better than the Cabbage Patch. 485 00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:39,879 Who names a dance after some dumb doll. 486 00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:41,214 - The Cabbage Patch. Show 'em how to do the... - [lLisa] Oh. 487 00:19:41,248 --> 00:19:42,282 - ...Cabbage Patch, baby. - The Cabbage Patch.... 488 00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:43,816 - Knock it off. - ain't a dumb doll. Now I... 489 00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:45,218 - Well shuka shuck. - ...believe you can break that Cabbage Patch deehwn! 490 00:19:45,252 --> 00:19:47,220 - All the way. Get it. Get it. - Eh heh, eah ow. Ow! 491 00:19:47,254 --> 00:19:49,389 [Donnie] Get it. Okay, easy now. Easy now. 492 00:19:49,422 --> 00:19:50,890 - ...You ain't that. Alright. Alright. - [Ebony yelping] 493 00:19:50,923 --> 00:19:52,325 - [Donnie] Alright. - [Lisa] Yeah, that's it. That's it. 494 00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:55,362 [Instrumental Music] 37962

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