Original subtitles

Slower, Bunny.

Slower. That's it.

Yeah. Yeah, keep doing it. Just like that. Just like that.

Oh, yeah. Just like that.

Oh, I can't wait.

I can't wait.

Fucking little cunt, I'm coming.

I'm... No.

Hold on. Hold on.

Keep doing it. Just like that.

Keep riding it like that.

Keep riding it like that.

Oh, that feels good.

Oh, that feels good.

Oh, yes!

A nice little 15 -year -old. Oh.

Oh. I haven't had one.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

Yeah. Make it come. Oh.

Oh.

Oh. Oh.

Now. Now let it go deep inside of you.

I don't know how many years since I had a tight, young virgin pressing down on

me.

Let your cunt feel all the thrust, actually.

I feel like a virgin, by the way.

That's right, keep pressing. Keep down.

Keep pressing harder.

Harder. Keep pressing harder.

Oh, let it go. No.

Make it... Make it loud.

Make it... I can't breathe.

Hello?

Oh, it's you, Sylvia. Look, I really can't talk. I've got a capon in the

and Sam will be home in a minute.

Better.

What's that supposed to mean? He's at a teacher's conference.

Uh -huh.

Ah.

Keep up with my rhythm. Of course I believe him.

Look, I really can't talk.

That's a rotten thing to say.

Now slowly, slowly, slowly up and down.

Yeah.

I want to feel that tight little cunt of yours.

Oh, I'm going to fill you up, you bitch.

Move your hips around, that's it. In a circular motion.

Yeah, yeah, around, around, yeah.

Yeah, just like that.

Fuck me.

Fuck me. Oh, Mr.

Pelham.

You don't stand a chance tonight, Sam.

I'm going to fill you up.

You're going to be full of my semen, you little cunting bitch.

I can't wait. I can't wait. I can't wait.

I'm coming.

I'm coming.

Real

fun.

Well, Sam, here's to our new beginning.

Hey, you're too young to drink. Cut that out.

You've got to be kidding, Mr. Pelham.

You know, I always wondered what it would be like to fuck my history

Ah, don't kid me.

I've seen you looking at all them tits and asses.

And how come you're always hanging out at the gym, huh?

Hey, look, that's quite enough out of you, young lady.

Bonnie?

Bonnie, are you home?

What the... What the hell are you doing in there with the door closed? Who the

hell is that?

That's my mother. Your what?

My mother.

Well, everybody's got one. Oh, don't worry about it. She was at a friend's

house. She just came home early.

You little cunt. How am I going to get out of here?

They usually go down the fires.

Don't tell me this is the last time.

Fix you so you won't even be able to walk again.

Little tramp.

Wait till you're fine again.

Go.

Get down the fire escape again.

Well, I'll fix this one.

I'll see that he winds up behind bars.

My own daughter.

A whore. God, where have I gone wrong?

Sam! I've prepared all this for you. Come, let's have some champagne before

dinner. Oh, come on, leave me alone, will you, Nora?

I had a rough day today at school, and I'm in no mood for celebrating.

I suppose you think it's easy teaching those little bastards, huh?

Some soft life, a college degree I needed.

Oh, please, Sam.

It was just like it was on our honeymoon.

Remember, I was too young to drink, so you had to bring a bottle of champagne

to the hotel room?

Jesus, knock it off, will ya?

Oh, come on. Get out of here.

Oh, my piece.

I could sleep for seven days.

Please have some champagne with me.

Champagne?

That's just beautiful.

That's just beautiful.

That's just what I need.

I work like an idiot all day long trying to teach history to homicidal morons,

and you want me to drink champagne.

Only I have a wife who buys caviar, champagne, anything else on a high

teacher's salary.

What's the matter with that?

Have I gotten too old for you?

Yeah, too old in the wrong places.

Caviar?

What the hell do you think this is anyway? The SS France?

You know, your body may have gotten old. You're not the cute little high school

cheerleader anymore.

But your brain hasn't gotten past the third grade.

Will you turn off that damn record?

Sure, sure, Sam will pay for it. Sam will pay for anything.

They'll tell him to the jet setter the block.

And will you shut the fucking light?

This is really very embarrassing, Dr. Malcolm.

I've never been to see a psychiatrist before.

But silly as... Yes, that's right. Nothing to fear when you sit in here.

Now, why do you think your husband won't touch you?

Because I'm too old.

You don't look very old. How old are you, Nora? You don't understand.

I'm 22.

We married when I was 16.

But my husband... Oh, he has this hang -up.

He likes young girls.

Well, I can understand that. I like them myself.

Now, as to your problem, say the first thing that comes into your mind.

Oh, no, on second thought, that'll take too long.

We have to deal with this problem directly.

Dr. Malligan, do you think I'm unattractive? Of course not. I find

attracted to you quite easily.

But you needn't worry. I can control my feelings.

Now... You seem to think that this is your fault. It isn't. I don't think it's

Sam's fault either.

These things happen in marriages when the partners have been very close.

What does that mean?

It means what it means. Don't worry about meanings.

That will only confuse the issue.

Just try to be subjective.

Don't try to figure out your problems. Just solve them. But what should I do?

There's only one thing for it. The answer is very simple.

You must...

have an affair.

This will prove that some men still find you attractive, and this will

undoubtedly change the pattern of your life.

But how do you, a psychiatrist, advise me to cheat on my husband?

He probably does the same thing.

Anyway, you're paying me for my professional opinion.

That is my professional opinion.

Take it or leave it.

I guess I'll have to take it.

But how do I go about having an affair?

Nora, I'm surprised at you. You know I can't advise you on that.

It would be unethical.

And then what did he say?

He said he couldn't advise me on how to do it.

How do you go about having an affair, Sylvia?

Don't you think it's about time you grew up, my dear?

I bet you still don't know anything.

Well, of course, how could you with that jellyfish of a husband you have?

Sylvia!

Oh, never mind.

At any rate, we must first decide what kind of a man we want to have an affair

with.

Let's see.

An intellectual?

A hard hat?

Truck driver?

What do you mean, we?

Look, sweetie, you don't think you're in this alone, do you?

Darren makes love to me once a week, on Sundays, if I'm very lucky.

He says that it's terribly gauche and recherché during the week.

He says that his mind is too full of art and inspirations during the

week.

Yeah,

I know what his mind is full of, all right.

So... We're both looking for affairs.

Now, what's it going to be? The intellectual or Stanley Kowalski?

Who's Stanley Kowalski?

Never mind.

I think we'll start with the creative type.

Darren went to an art gallery opening just the other day.

The artiste, as they say, is simply divine.

Sylvia, I just don't know.

Look, there he is. Now come on, let's go over. I'll introduce you.

Sylvia, what do you want with us?

Nora, don't be such an ass.

How do you do?

My name is Nigel Fotherington.

How very charming of you to come to my gallery.

Charming. When I've told you my name, you must tell me yours.

Oh, I'm so delighted to meet you, Mr. Fotherington.

I'm Sylvia, darling.

That's charming.

And this is Laura Callow.

Charming.

I can only hope that you will be mildly amused by my modest attempts.

You show very good taste in coming to my gallery.

The most important thing in life is chic.

And, of course, a discerning eye.

How very delighted I am to meet you, Mr. Farthing.

And now, my darlings, I shall take you and show you everything.

This is all breathtaking.

I don't know very much about all this, but I'm sure you're a very great artist.

Yes, I can just see the greatness all over the place.

My dear Nora, every moment I live, I'm creating.

Everything to me is art.

I shall now take you and transform you into my own creation, and then you will

see my true genius.

You two darlings run along and create.

Aunt Sylvia is late for her dog show.

She expects to win first prize.

Her friend is a little too cynical for my tastes.

Do you?

Charming.

Now come with me.

I'm terribly sorry. The gallery is closed for today.

Thank you for coming.

Good afternoon.

For now, Nora, let us go over there, and we will create.

We're wasting time.

Good loads.

Well, can't you pay me with my croissant?

You're joking, Charlie.

You Americans.

To think that I would be so pedestrian as to use canvas.

No, this masterpiece will be a moment in time.

Now, remove your clothes.

Stop it. You must be mad.

I'll scream. Really, you must be crazy.

You can scream all you like. You'll not be heard. For this room is soundproof.

Yes, it caters to my eccentricities.

Twist and turn. Help create my new marketing.

Dreams.

Keep pleading, Nora.

Struggle. Struggle.

You are my work of art. Your fear is my greatest

creation.

That's it, Nora. More.

Now keep fighting.

Now it isn't any good unless...

as your sweet flesh is caressed by my artistry.

Keep bleeding, Nora. Struggle.

Know the ecstasy of greatness.

Know the ultimate pleasure of pain.

Thank you.

Oh. Oh.

Thank you.

That was rather charming, Nora. You had just the right amount of fear and

passion. I have given birth to a great new work.

How pleased you must be to know that.

Why don't you come back tomorrow afternoon around three? I shall need the

sort of inspiration again.

Nora?

Nora?

Nora?

Nora?

You know, you look different somehow.

How?

Oh, I don't know.

Never mind.

When are you leaving?

Tonight.

I'll be back in about a week after the teacher's convention.

Will you miss me?

Hmm.

I was thinking, maybe you should go to your mother's.

Hmm.

least you could do is say that you'll miss me. Maybe even ask me what hotel

staying at.

I'll miss you, but must I know what hotel you'll be staying at?

Never mind.

That's the thanks I get for making a living.

And change that goddamn wall back to a normal color. This whole place looks

a bubble gum factory.

Shit.

Wait until Sam left. Now, I want you to tell me everything.

You sure know some crazy people, Sylvia. Come on in.

Well, did it happen? Did you have an affair?

Well, it was fun.

Until he started whipping me.

He whipped you?

Oh, that's marvelous. That's even better than I dared hope for.

How was it?

Did you like it?

Did he hurt you?

Was it fabulous?

Did he make love to you?

Are you nuts?

I was terrified.

Well, actually, it was a little exciting.

Oh, really?

Were you really turned on? I mean, really turned on?

Are you going back?

You must be out of your mind. I want to go to bed, not to the hospital.

That man should be locked up.

I don't think I want to meet any more of your friends, Sylvia.

Well, I mean, Nora, what are you going to do now?

Sam is leaving.

He won't be back till next week, so I'll have plenty of time to experiment.

I think I'll try something a little less violent.

For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings.

that then I scorn to change my state with kings.

Oh, Nora, my love, we are the children of our spirits, the souls of spring

to come.

We must consummate the rites of spring and let our bodies and souls rise

together in a communion to the gods.

Is all this really necessary?

This is my shrine to all the gods of

poetry. Keats, Shelley, Wordsworth,

Tennyson, Lord Byron,

Longfellow.

Oh, my God.

Oh.

Amen.

No. No.

I must speak, Nora.

The words are burning in my mouth.

Or maybe it's the stiffen.

Nora.

We were meant to be together for all eternity, can't you see?

What are you talking about?

It's our destiny.

The fates have thrown us together.

You must marry me, Nora.

You must marry me today.

Today, Nora, please.

Or I will not be responsible for my own life.

I should have known you were off the wall when you asked me to dress this

And the set.

It's like a reject from South Pacific.

You cannot deny what is ours.

Come, Nora. We will marry this afternoon.

Oh, fuck off.

Aren't there any sane men left in this world who just want a good lay?

Nora, Nora, you will marry me.

It is inevitable.

We will be married this afternoon.

Nora, marry me.

Marry me!

to think the only sane and uncomplicated man left in this world is Sam.

Oh, for heaven's sake, Nora, don't be like that.

Just because you ran into a couple of freaks doesn't mean you're going to give

up, does it?

I don't know.

I've begun to realize just how much I love Sam.

Ugh.

Don't worry.

I'm not going to give up.

That's the spirit. On to the hordes.

Nora, have you ever had your fortune told?

No, of course not.

Well, it just so happens that I have a friend who has given me the address of a

very special fortune teller. Wait a minute.

Not another friend of yours.

Oh, but I'll be there, so it'll be just fine.

Don't worry about a thing.

Oh, well, what have I got to lose except my life?

I see a man.

I see a man entering your life.

I see a man who is more than a man.

I see two men.

No, I see a man who is 13 feet high.

No, no, no, he's not high.

He's long.

Yes, that is it, a man who is 13 inches long.

Incredible. He's 13 inches long.

Oh, this is heaven.

And he's called?

He is called El Goncho, yes.

El Goncho. Now, what does that mean?

I don't know. It's cloudy. I can't see.

Oh, come on. Bring him back. Come on.

Yes, yes. It is getting clearer now. I see. It means the schnook.

No, no, no, that cannot be.

I look again. It means... It means the hook. Yes, he is called the hook.

And the crystal tells me that he is here now.

He is here, and he is looking for Julia.

Oh, really?

But that's impossible. I haven't seen anybody here, have you? Not since we

filmed. The crystal never lies.

He is here now, and the crystal didn't get me.

Can you imagine? Isn't that the most absurd thing you ever...

Is that thing for real?

Madame Cheney is never fake. Everything in her house is real.

Yes, pull on it.

You'll see.

The boy speaks no English, but he's cock.

This is international.

He seems to have taken a fancy to Trulia.

Very well.

That's fine.

The crystal ball never lies.

You may take him up to the roommate.

The door has opened.

Well, what the hell? I can only love one, right?

The log of faith.

Now wait a minute! No, no, no, no, there's nothing you can do. It's written

the stars.

Come, come, darling. Take off your clothes and we'll see what we have here.

Um, but I've never been with a woman before. I mean, I... Come, I will clean

out first, and then we will see how well you make love.

I haven't had a good piece in over a week.

Oh.

Huh?

Thank you.

Yes.

Yes.

Thank you.

No, my sweet little boy must have his fun.

Open your mouth.

Thank you.

Oh.

oh oh

Sam is in Chicago and can't even defend himself. I'm having these terrible

feelings of guilt about these affairs.

But I'm addicted.

I can't give it up. I've never felt so alive in years.

This feeling of being alive is good, Nora.

Now you begin to understand some of your problems.

Your father was the key figure.

And your Oedipal problems all stem from him.

This hysterical laryngitis.

is a manifestation of that very symptom.

Now, Sam was a substitute father that you never had.

And your incestuous feelings toward Sam made you tired and unresponsive. So you

see, the ramifications of what you have recently been involved in... I don't

know what the fuck you're talking about!

Hysterical laryngitis shit!

If you had just given head to 13 1⁄2 inches, you'd be a little horse, too!

I am merely saying that now that you're cured... and go back to your husband and

resume the marriage that every young girl dreams about, and then you can...

garbage! You don't hear a word I'm saying!

You're nothing but a textbook!

Forget it, Doc! You're a pile of bullshit!

And as you see, your edible motivations are easily within the grasp of your own

mind. So no matter how subconscious your fears might be, or even were, for that

matter, you might as well forget the whole thing.

Hey, this is really nice.

Wow. You like it?

Yeah, who pays for this place? Daddy, who else?

Daddy. Oh.

This is really such a beautiful place.

Make yourself at home.

Oh, sure, Nora.

Nora!

No, never mind, Nora.

Get rid of the shit. Oh, but I like that.

I like it.

Who's afraid of Virginia Woolf? Virginia Woolf. Nora, Virginia Woolf. Nora's

afraid of Virginia Woolf. Have some wine. You work on that thing. I'll work

that. Yeah, you can't get it off.

Oh, that's very nice.

I'm in the mood, baby.

You were hot to trap before. Let's get going.

Air conditioner.

Oh, that's very good.

Oh, I can't get this thing on time. Oh, baby. Oh, you turned me on.

Oh, you turned me on.

Oh, thank you, Nora.

Oh,

Nora. Nora, I love you.

Oh, I've been so bad to you. I'm so sorry.

Oh, eat me, Charlie.

Oh, suck me. The name is Sam.

Oh, Charlie.

Sam.

Charlie, suck me.

Sam. Oh, Charlie, that's it.

Oh, get it, Charlie. The name is Sam.

Oh, Charlie. If you call me Charlie once more, I'm going to bite your clit off.

Sam.

Nora, I love you, Nora. Oh, get it. Oh, Nora.

um um

um

Thank you.

Nora. Nora, darling, come on.

Let's have some wine to celebrate my first night home.

Please, Ben.

Some other time. I'm much too tired.

Yes, but I've been neglecting you, and I want to change all that.

Not right now.

Anyway, you forgot the caviar.

Boy, am I beat. I could sleep for seven days.

Yeah, but I thought... What did you think? Do you think you had a rough day?

Well, I had it tough.

Washing and cleaning and then trying to look beautiful. I've never been so worn

out.

Sure, Nora will be there. Her body waiting for her lord and master. Sure,

wine. Buy wine.

But nobody even asks me if I want wine.

And Sam, turn off the damn light.