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ZOEY: They say bad things
come in threes,
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00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,409
and, sadly, I had become
living proof of that.
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00:00:06,442 --> 00:00:10,112
Enduring a betrayal from
my best friend and boyfriend...
4
00:00:10,146 --> 00:00:13,215
You knew they were hooking up,
and you kept it from me?
5
00:00:13,249 --> 00:00:15,651
Not my secret to share.
6
00:00:15,685 --> 00:00:17,421
♪ I'm too busy ♪
7
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...a cheating scandal
with my chemistry final...
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00:00:20,122 --> 00:00:23,092
♪ Wishing for some luck ♪
9
00:00:23,125 --> 00:00:25,928
...which led to
a financial crisis with my dad.
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00:00:25,962 --> 00:00:26,997
I'm cutting you off, Zoey.
11
00:00:27,029 --> 00:00:28,665
...that hit harder
than when the Internet
12
00:00:28,698 --> 00:00:30,801
made Blockbuster its bitch.
13
00:00:30,833 --> 00:00:34,003
Thankfully, I had resolved
my first two issues.
14
00:00:34,037 --> 00:00:35,005
♪ They say I gotta wait ♪
15
00:00:35,037 --> 00:00:36,739
♪ Wait it out, wait it out ♪
16
00:00:36,772 --> 00:00:39,075
And even though my dad
had cut off my credit cards...
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00:00:39,109 --> 00:00:40,077
Declined?
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00:00:40,110 --> 00:00:41,577
...I wasn't worried.
19
00:00:41,610 --> 00:00:44,146
It's only a matter of time
before my dad rolls over
20
00:00:44,180 --> 00:00:46,015
and basically begs for my forgiveness.
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00:00:46,049 --> 00:00:47,985
In fact, I bet
that there is a guilt gift
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00:00:48,018 --> 00:00:49,786
waiting on my doorstep.
23
00:00:49,818 --> 00:00:51,487
- [Clang]
- Eh?
24
00:00:53,289 --> 00:00:55,859
What is he doing to my baby?!
25
00:00:57,226 --> 00:01:00,930
[Singsong voice] Hi, sir.
Hi. Nice to meet you.
26
00:01:00,963 --> 00:01:03,599
Um, I-I-I know that
this is faculty parking,
27
00:01:03,633 --> 00:01:05,634
but everyone knows that Professor Diaz
28
00:01:05,668 --> 00:01:07,270
never uses this spot
since she's in rehab
29
00:01:07,303 --> 00:01:08,605
for scratcher tickets.
30
00:01:08,637 --> 00:01:10,473
Look, the owner of the car
requested the tow.
31
00:01:10,506 --> 00:01:11,541
Mm, fun fact...
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00:01:11,574 --> 00:01:13,176
I am actually the owner of the car.
33
00:01:13,208 --> 00:01:16,178
Well, then, I'm just doing
what you told me to...
34
00:01:16,211 --> 00:01:19,148
- Oh?
- ...Andre Johnson.
35
00:01:19,181 --> 00:01:21,684
[Breathes deeply]
36
00:01:21,717 --> 00:01:24,687
Dad?!
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00:01:24,720 --> 00:01:26,055
You know what?
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00:01:26,088 --> 00:01:28,691
I bet he is taking this car away
39
00:01:28,725 --> 00:01:32,329
to replace it with
a more expensive, newer one.
40
00:01:32,362 --> 00:01:35,032
That's how a good guilt gift
works, right?
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00:01:35,065 --> 00:01:36,800
- [Engine starts]
- Right?
42
00:01:36,833 --> 00:01:38,402
No!
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00:01:38,434 --> 00:01:41,070
Oh, God! Remember me!
44
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♪♪
45
00:01:43,106 --> 00:01:44,174
[Sighs]
46
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♪ Watch out, world, I'm grown now ♪
47
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♪ I'm grown ♪
48
00:01:49,612 --> 00:01:52,049
♪ Learn something new every day ♪
49
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♪ I don't know, so I'm-a feel my way ♪
50
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♪ Got the weight of the world on me ♪
51
00:01:57,119 --> 00:02:00,222
♪ But no regrets, this is what I say ♪
52
00:02:00,255 --> 00:02:04,061
♪ Watch out, world, I'm grown now ♪
53
00:02:04,093 --> 00:02:05,662
- ♪ I'm grown ♪
- ♪ You can tell me ♪
54
00:02:05,694 --> 00:02:10,905
♪ My heart beating so loud ♪
55
00:02:10,930 --> 00:02:14,500
♪ Mama, look, I'm grown now ♪
56
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♪ I'm grown ♪
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Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
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Repo'ing my car?
59
00:02:20,976 --> 00:02:23,847
Low blow, Andre Johnson. Low. Blow.
60
00:02:23,879 --> 00:02:25,549
I mean, I knew
this man had a petty bone,
61
00:02:25,581 --> 00:02:26,949
but this is another level.
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00:02:26,982 --> 00:02:30,087
Like "Blac Chyna having
a whole-ass revenge baby"
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00:02:30,119 --> 00:02:31,688
type level.
64
00:02:31,720 --> 00:02:33,289
But it's okay because your girl
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has some other tricks up her sleeve.
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00:02:35,457 --> 00:02:36,693
Okay.
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00:02:36,725 --> 00:02:42,732
♪♪
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00:02:43,232 --> 00:02:49,238
♪♪
69
00:02:49,973 --> 00:02:53,910
All right. Well, then, time for Plan B.
70
00:02:53,943 --> 00:02:58,615
♪♪
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00:03:05,154 --> 00:03:08,091
I feel so unloved.
72
00:03:08,123 --> 00:03:09,793
Is this how my other siblings feel?
73
00:03:09,825 --> 00:03:11,627
[Groans]
74
00:03:11,660 --> 00:03:13,062
Cut off? So, what does this mean?
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00:03:13,095 --> 00:03:14,396
Do you have to, like,
drop out of school?
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00:03:14,430 --> 00:03:16,933
No. My mom said they'll
still cover tuition,
77
00:03:16,966 --> 00:03:17,968
housing, books,
78
00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:19,169
but everything else...
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00:03:19,201 --> 00:03:20,903
my clothing, my groceries,
80
00:03:20,937 --> 00:03:22,439
my Japanese soda subscription box...
81
00:03:22,472 --> 00:03:23,807
- I'm completely on my own.
- Mm.
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00:03:23,839 --> 00:03:24,841
Girl, please.
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00:03:24,873 --> 00:03:26,342
You're over here whining
when your parents
84
00:03:26,375 --> 00:03:27,843
are still covering your basic needs?
85
00:03:27,877 --> 00:03:30,147
Yeah, we literally have
to run for our lives
86
00:03:30,180 --> 00:03:31,515
to support ourselves.
87
00:03:31,547 --> 00:03:33,817
We're in a four-year version
of "The Hunger Games."
88
00:03:33,849 --> 00:03:35,017
But what should I do?
89
00:03:35,051 --> 00:03:36,920
TOGETHER: Get. A. Job. Bitch.
90
00:03:36,952 --> 00:03:38,521
Um, [chuckles] okay. I already have one.
91
00:03:38,555 --> 00:03:42,192
Does no one here remember the
Zoey Johnson Styling Experience?
92
00:03:42,224 --> 00:03:44,493
TOGETHER: Get. A. Real. Job. Bitch.
93
00:03:44,527 --> 00:03:46,529
Who said you could clap with us?
94
00:03:46,563 --> 00:03:47,831
I just kind of went for it.
95
00:03:47,863 --> 00:03:49,866
It's fun.
96
00:03:49,898 --> 00:03:53,270
♪♪
97
00:03:53,302 --> 00:03:55,337
Look, there's a million
different things you could do.
98
00:03:55,371 --> 00:03:56,338
Like this one.
99
00:03:56,372 --> 00:03:58,175
You could be a tutor.
100
00:03:58,207 --> 00:04:00,643
"Sophomore seeking help with chemistry."
101
00:04:00,676 --> 00:04:02,645
Oh, you put this one up.
102
00:04:02,678 --> 00:04:05,782
I'm just gonna put ya
back where I found ya.
103
00:04:05,814 --> 00:04:08,617
Hang in there, little buddy. Okay.
104
00:04:08,651 --> 00:04:10,187
What about dog walking?
105
00:04:10,219 --> 00:04:12,188
I can't walk dogs in Givenchy.
106
00:04:12,222 --> 00:04:14,157
Then change your shoes
and fix your life.
107
00:04:14,190 --> 00:04:15,291
Yeah, Zoey,
108
00:04:15,325 --> 00:04:17,159
stop acting like you're
too good for all of this.
109
00:04:17,193 --> 00:04:18,728
Everybody has a hustle.
110
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:20,630
Doug works at the bookstore,
111
00:04:20,662 --> 00:04:22,299
Aaron's got his whole R.A. thing...
112
00:04:22,332 --> 00:04:24,534
I mean, even Vivek
works in the Cal U branch
113
00:04:24,566 --> 00:04:27,037
of the Sinaloa Cartel,
but don't tell anyone.
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Uh, right, allow me
to reintroduce myself.
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I'm Zoey Johnson.
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I interned for Teen Vogue.
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We had an espresso machine.
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00:04:34,277 --> 00:04:37,247
Every day I'd get
a double-small, bone-dry cap
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00:04:37,279 --> 00:04:39,481
with extra foam and extra hot.
120
00:04:39,514 --> 00:04:40,668
Which was served to me...
121
00:04:40,700 --> 00:04:42,192
- ...by another intern.
- Mm-hmm.
122
00:04:42,217 --> 00:04:46,188
Any of this would be taking
a step backwards.
123
00:04:46,222 --> 00:04:47,823
I can't even look at her right now.
124
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Can you please just guide my hand
125
00:04:49,525 --> 00:04:50,693
to her face?
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00:04:50,726 --> 00:04:53,096
Okay, all I'm asking for
is a job that vibes
127
00:04:53,128 --> 00:04:54,664
with all of this. Look.
128
00:04:54,697 --> 00:04:55,732
How about what vibes
129
00:04:55,765 --> 00:04:58,767
with all of this?
130
00:04:58,801 --> 00:05:02,038
It's gonna take a whole lot
more than twenty grand
131
00:05:02,070 --> 00:05:03,339
to loot this temple.
132
00:05:03,373 --> 00:05:04,508
Um, for twenty grand,
133
00:05:04,541 --> 00:05:07,010
I'd go up there right now and
get those eggs my damn self.
134
00:05:08,611 --> 00:05:11,281
You know that thing
is made mostly of butter.
135
00:05:11,313 --> 00:05:13,249
I'd ballpark six hundo cals.
136
00:05:13,282 --> 00:05:15,384
What did I tell you
about counting my calories?
137
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I just care about you, man.
138
00:05:16,452 --> 00:05:19,055
- Stop.
- Oh. Brava!
139
00:05:19,087 --> 00:05:20,522
Brava! Brava!
140
00:05:20,556 --> 00:05:22,558
- Dicks. Absolute dicks. The both of you.
- Hit me up, right? Come on.
141
00:05:22,592 --> 00:05:24,426
- No, I will not. Thank you.
- You know what?
142
00:05:24,460 --> 00:05:26,930
Yes, we had sex.
143
00:05:26,962 --> 00:05:28,097
That's nice.
144
00:05:28,130 --> 00:05:29,398
How's your little brunch going?
145
00:05:29,431 --> 00:05:30,400
It's good.
146
00:05:30,433 --> 00:05:31,401
I wish he'd eat better.
147
00:05:31,433 --> 00:05:32,701
Could you get off my meal plan?
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00:05:32,734 --> 00:05:34,104
You'll have to excuse them, Ana.
149
00:05:34,137 --> 00:05:35,939
They're, uh, incredibly stupid,
150
00:05:35,972 --> 00:05:38,541
and also going through
very long, dusty, dry spells.
151
00:05:38,573 --> 00:05:39,541
Isn't that right, boys?
152
00:05:39,575 --> 00:05:42,545
Anti-facts. I. Am. Good.
153
00:05:42,577 --> 00:05:44,647
Facts. I. Am. Horny.
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00:05:44,681 --> 00:05:46,383
Ew.
155
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I'm all right to admit
I'm in a dry spell.
156
00:05:48,318 --> 00:05:50,152
But I will end it, and when I do,
157
00:05:50,186 --> 00:05:51,721
I'm gonna strut right over there
158
00:05:51,753 --> 00:05:53,657
- and do the "Shield Challenge."
- The what?
159
00:05:53,690 --> 00:05:55,791
Your lover doesn't know
about the "Shield Challenge"?
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00:05:55,825 --> 00:05:56,825
Well, she does now.
161
00:05:56,859 --> 00:05:58,962
Bro, communication is key, guys.
162
00:05:58,995 --> 00:06:01,331
I mean, you know,
if you're gonna make it.
163
00:06:01,363 --> 00:06:02,464
What the idiots are talking about
164
00:06:02,498 --> 00:06:04,301
is that it's
a time-honored Cal U tradition
165
00:06:04,334 --> 00:06:06,136
for, you know, two people,
if they have feelings,
166
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uh, to beautifully consummate...
167
00:06:07,703 --> 00:06:09,305
Until you tear it up
under the Titan Shield,
168
00:06:09,339 --> 00:06:10,674
you're not considered a real Titan.
169
00:06:10,707 --> 00:06:12,409
- Essentially, yeah.
- [Laughing] Wait. What?
170
00:06:12,441 --> 00:06:14,977
I-I think it's juvenile and stupid.
171
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Right. So stupid that you took
our boy Marcus to Benihana
172
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once he smashed under the Shield.
173
00:06:20,483 --> 00:06:22,519
Coffee. We need coffee.
174
00:06:22,551 --> 00:06:23,419
You want coffee? Let's...
175
00:06:23,452 --> 00:06:25,354
Wait. Are you a "real Titan"?
176
00:06:25,387 --> 00:06:27,524
Uh... not yet.
177
00:06:28,457 --> 00:06:29,926
Yo, you hear that?
178
00:06:29,959 --> 00:06:32,662
We're goin' to Benihana, my G!
179
00:06:32,695 --> 00:06:33,697
- Unh!
- Yeah!
180
00:06:33,729 --> 00:06:36,299
♪ Freedom ♪
181
00:06:36,332 --> 00:06:38,534
Even though my dad had cut me off
182
00:06:38,568 --> 00:06:41,705
and Jazz was trying to
"Handmaid's Tale" my fertility,
183
00:06:41,738 --> 00:06:43,540
I still landed on my feet...
184
00:06:43,573 --> 00:06:46,943
or should I say my YSL heels?
185
00:06:46,976 --> 00:06:48,978
♪ Oh, I'm feeling like ♪
186
00:06:49,010 --> 00:06:52,282
So, Luca used some of his
connections to call in a favor
187
00:06:52,315 --> 00:06:54,050
and got me a job at a high-end boutique,
188
00:06:54,082 --> 00:06:56,452
which means your girl
gets to work with clothes,
189
00:06:56,486 --> 00:06:59,456
clothes get to work with me,
and not to jump the gun, but...
190
00:06:59,488 --> 00:07:01,291
[Singsong voice] ...career starter!
191
00:07:01,323 --> 00:07:03,559
♪ A superstar ♪
192
00:07:03,592 --> 00:07:06,429
♪ Oh, I'm feeling like ♪
193
00:07:07,679 --> 00:07:09,140
WOMAN: Maybe not her eyes,
but she totally did...
194
00:07:09,165 --> 00:07:10,241
...something to her...
195
00:07:10,266 --> 00:07:11,968
You white girls
do not know how to snack.
196
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:14,537
Like, do you come out the womb
eating pumpkin-flavored crap?
197
00:07:14,570 --> 00:07:16,306
You know, you don't need
to eat my snacks
198
00:07:16,339 --> 00:07:18,208
that I bought with my money.
199
00:07:18,241 --> 00:07:20,008
They just taste better
when other people buy them.
200
00:07:20,041 --> 00:07:21,477
- [Door opens]
- Mm-hmm.
201
00:07:21,510 --> 00:07:23,679
- Oh, my God.
- Wow.
202
00:07:23,712 --> 00:07:25,248
That's what you wore on your first day?
203
00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:26,582
You must've killed it.
204
00:07:26,616 --> 00:07:28,418
And those feet.
205
00:07:28,450 --> 00:07:31,854
Well, you know,
I wish my boss appreciated
206
00:07:31,887 --> 00:07:34,056
all the effort I put in
as much as you guys.
207
00:07:34,089 --> 00:07:36,226
Unfortunately,
she couldn't see past her envy
208
00:07:36,258 --> 00:07:39,094
and told me to go home... forever.
209
00:07:39,128 --> 00:07:40,597
What?
210
00:07:40,630 --> 00:07:43,433
Yeah, I got fired.
211
00:07:43,465 --> 00:07:45,033
Oh.
212
00:07:45,066 --> 00:07:46,769
♪♪
213
00:07:48,944 --> 00:07:50,187
You got fired?!
214
00:07:50,212 --> 00:07:52,296
Zoey, you were there for,
like, four hours.
215
00:07:52,321 --> 00:07:54,443
I've heard worse.
Our cousin Speedy got fired
216
00:07:54,476 --> 00:07:56,279
after forty-five minutes at Pep Boys.
217
00:07:56,311 --> 00:07:58,514
Mm-hmm. Got caught
in the bathroom huffin' Bondo
218
00:07:58,548 --> 00:08:00,850
and drinking windshield-wiper fluid.
219
00:08:00,883 --> 00:08:03,419
I can't with Cousin Speedy right now.
220
00:08:03,452 --> 00:08:05,087
- R.I.P.
- All right, guys.
221
00:08:05,121 --> 00:08:06,589
As much as I appreciate the deep dive
222
00:08:06,621 --> 00:08:08,390
on your family's work/death history,
223
00:08:08,424 --> 00:08:09,793
I think we need to let Zoey speak.
224
00:08:09,825 --> 00:08:11,693
- Okay. Mm-hmm.
- The floor of shame is yours.
225
00:08:11,726 --> 00:08:14,863
Well, there's not much to tell...
226
00:08:14,897 --> 00:08:18,301
other than I got fired for...
227
00:08:18,334 --> 00:08:19,836
not folding.
228
00:08:22,839 --> 00:08:25,608
Oh.
229
00:08:25,640 --> 00:08:27,611
Zoey, what are you doing?
230
00:08:29,645 --> 00:08:31,614
Look, I styled the mannequin!
231
00:08:31,646 --> 00:08:32,881
Why?
232
00:08:32,914 --> 00:08:34,217
I hired you to fold.
233
00:08:34,250 --> 00:08:35,618
Already did it.
234
00:08:35,650 --> 00:08:37,453
Great. Fold them again.
235
00:08:37,486 --> 00:08:40,457
Uh, but it's already folded,
236
00:08:40,490 --> 00:08:42,459
and this mannequin was sitting here,
237
00:08:42,491 --> 00:08:44,327
screaming for my help.
238
00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:46,563
I styled that mannequin.
239
00:08:46,596 --> 00:08:48,431
Mm.
240
00:08:48,463 --> 00:08:50,632
Well, the funny story
241
00:08:50,665 --> 00:08:52,267
about this [chuckling] very mannequin
242
00:08:52,300 --> 00:08:56,438
is that it was sitting here,
screaming, "Hey! Help me.
243
00:08:56,472 --> 00:08:59,608
I've been styled too good!"
244
00:08:59,641 --> 00:09:02,678
So... A-plus on that.
245
00:09:02,712 --> 00:09:05,615
Listen, I hired you to fold. So fold.
246
00:09:05,648 --> 00:09:08,284
And when you're done,
shake out the folded T-shirts
247
00:09:08,317 --> 00:09:09,519
and fold them again.
248
00:09:09,552 --> 00:09:11,154
Am I being clear?
249
00:09:11,187 --> 00:09:12,755
Very. [Chuckles nervously]
250
00:09:12,788 --> 00:09:18,794
♪♪
251
00:09:20,630 --> 00:09:22,631
Oh.
252
00:09:22,664 --> 00:09:25,367
Wow. Even Cousin Speedy
respected authority.
253
00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:27,169
The shirts are already folded!
254
00:09:27,202 --> 00:09:30,640
And I just don't see the point
of folding and unfolding.
255
00:09:30,673 --> 00:09:32,008
I want to advise and style
256
00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:35,010
and earn commission
and just be fabulous!
257
00:09:35,044 --> 00:09:37,547
Yeah, but, Zoey, it sounds
like you were hired to fold...
258
00:09:37,579 --> 00:09:39,648
...and then shut up,
and then fold some more.
259
00:09:39,682 --> 00:09:40,717
[Whimpers]
260
00:09:40,750 --> 00:09:42,118
You know what? It's all for the best
261
00:09:42,150 --> 00:09:45,121
because I learned that I am
better at boutique shopping
262
00:09:45,154 --> 00:09:46,556
than boutique working.
263
00:09:46,588 --> 00:09:49,325
And it's fine because I will
find something even more dope.
264
00:09:51,560 --> 00:09:54,630
Zoey, honey, listen to me.
265
00:09:54,664 --> 00:09:56,698
Egg harvesting is hella dope.
266
00:09:56,731 --> 00:10:00,135
Why are you so obsessed
with selling my eggs?
267
00:10:00,169 --> 00:10:03,472
Why are you so obsessed
with keeping your eggs?
268
00:10:03,505 --> 00:10:07,843
♪♪
269
00:10:07,876 --> 00:10:09,746
Aww.
270
00:10:09,779 --> 00:10:11,380
Look at all the Shield lovers
271
00:10:11,414 --> 00:10:12,848
who have carved their initials in here.
272
00:10:12,881 --> 00:10:14,550
Ooh! [Breathes sharply]
273
00:10:14,583 --> 00:10:15,851
What is that smell?
274
00:10:15,885 --> 00:10:17,319
Ugh.
275
00:10:17,352 --> 00:10:19,722
Look, it's just a stupid tradition.
276
00:10:19,755 --> 00:10:21,256
Like, if it makes you uncomfortable,
277
00:10:21,289 --> 00:10:23,492
- we don't have to...
- No. No, no.
278
00:10:23,525 --> 00:10:27,063
Torres women do not back down
from a challenge.
279
00:10:27,096 --> 00:10:29,599
But, I mean, if you wanna punk out...
280
00:10:29,631 --> 00:10:31,667
Me? Pssh. What?
281
00:10:31,701 --> 00:10:32,835
I would go right now, broad daylight,
282
00:10:32,867 --> 00:10:34,169
butt-naked, no problem.
283
00:10:34,202 --> 00:10:35,704
- No, please don't.
- You sure?
284
00:10:35,737 --> 00:10:36,939
Yeah, no, we... we have a plan.
285
00:10:36,972 --> 00:10:38,207
- Let's stick to it.
- Okay.
286
00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:40,677
Under the cover of night, so...
287
00:10:40,709 --> 00:10:43,679
you bring a blanket, and I will bring...
288
00:10:43,712 --> 00:10:45,048
the sanitizer.
289
00:10:45,081 --> 00:10:47,616
- Good.
- Lots of sanitizer.
290
00:10:47,650 --> 00:10:49,284
[Chuckling] Yeah.
291
00:10:49,318 --> 00:10:52,621
♪♪
292
00:10:52,654 --> 00:10:54,424
Okay.
293
00:10:54,457 --> 00:10:55,725
[Sniffs]
294
00:10:55,757 --> 00:10:57,559
Why would I do that?
295
00:10:57,592 --> 00:10:58,895
♪ Looked to the sky ♪
296
00:10:58,928 --> 00:11:02,731
Since high-end retail
was clearly threatened by me,
297
00:11:02,765 --> 00:11:05,534
it was time to find a gig
that really appreciated
298
00:11:05,568 --> 00:11:07,403
what Zoey Johnson had to offer.
299
00:11:07,435 --> 00:11:09,738
After scouring the Internet
and finding nothing
300
00:11:09,771 --> 00:11:12,708
but entry-level,
minimum-wage weekend jobs,
301
00:11:12,741 --> 00:11:15,812
I finally found something
that would fit my vibe.
302
00:11:15,845 --> 00:11:18,781
ZOEY: So, yeah, it's not
the most conventional job,
303
00:11:18,813 --> 00:11:21,416
but I'm getting paid
twenty-five dollars an hour
304
00:11:21,449 --> 00:11:23,619
to be living, breathing art.
305
00:11:23,653 --> 00:11:25,788
I'm practically napping
in a five-star hotel,
306
00:11:25,821 --> 00:11:28,825
which, T.B.H., is something
I'd totally do for free.
307
00:11:28,857 --> 00:11:30,492
I'm pretty much robbing them.
308
00:11:30,525 --> 00:11:31,760
[Chuckles]
309
00:11:31,794 --> 00:11:33,096
♪ I could have done you the same ♪
310
00:11:33,129 --> 00:11:34,664
♪ Disgusted by everything you became ♪
311
00:11:34,697 --> 00:11:36,599
♪ Now I'm looking decapitated ♪
312
00:11:36,631 --> 00:11:38,568
♪ You sent me your salutations ♪
313
00:11:38,601 --> 00:11:40,102
♪ I never could value favorites ♪
314
00:11:40,135 --> 00:11:42,838
♪ That's not in my calculations ♪
315
00:11:42,871 --> 00:11:44,406
[Gasps]
316
00:11:44,439 --> 00:11:47,776
♪♪
317
00:11:47,809 --> 00:11:49,277
[Whispering] It's Zoey.
318
00:11:49,310 --> 00:11:53,348
Um, hey, I'm gonna go put our names down
319
00:11:53,381 --> 00:11:54,349
at the oyster bar.
320
00:11:54,382 --> 00:11:56,618
All right. Uh,
321
00:11:56,651 --> 00:11:57,686
I'm gonna go find management
322
00:11:57,720 --> 00:11:59,789
and make a complaint about Box Girl
323
00:11:59,822 --> 00:12:03,592
- because that is bullshit.
- [Scoffs] Yeah, it is.
324
00:12:03,625 --> 00:12:04,961
So, is there, like...
like, a secret hatch
325
00:12:04,994 --> 00:12:06,863
that you just... tsh...
drop out of, or how does that...
326
00:12:06,895 --> 00:12:09,031
Oh, whatever.
Can we rewind for a second?
327
00:12:09,064 --> 00:12:11,199
Are you, like, on a date right now?
328
00:12:11,232 --> 00:12:13,135
With our professor?
329
00:12:13,169 --> 00:12:17,840
I mean, first of all, hey!
330
00:12:17,872 --> 00:12:20,542
And, second of all...
331
00:12:20,576 --> 00:12:22,010
Look, it's not just a date, okay?
332
00:12:22,044 --> 00:12:23,513
We're kind of seeing each other.
333
00:12:25,313 --> 00:12:27,482
And she's not even
our professor anymore, so...
334
00:12:27,515 --> 00:12:29,818
But she's still a faculty member.
335
00:12:29,851 --> 00:12:31,853
Okay, look, can we not talk
about this right now?
336
00:12:31,886 --> 00:12:32,907
'Cause Paige is gonna start
337
00:12:32,931 --> 00:12:33,983
- wondering where I am...
- "Paige"? Wow.
338
00:12:34,008 --> 00:12:36,625
Are... Are you kidding?
You're on a first-name basis?
339
00:12:36,659 --> 00:12:38,193
Mm-hmm. Yes, I am,
340
00:12:38,226 --> 00:12:39,361
because it would be really weird
341
00:12:39,395 --> 00:12:40,996
to call her "Professor Hewson"
on a date.
342
00:12:41,029 --> 00:12:42,664
And what does she call you? Right?
343
00:12:42,698 --> 00:12:44,400
Like... "Nomi"?
344
00:12:44,433 --> 00:12:46,568
God, please, please
don't be weird about this.
345
00:12:46,601 --> 00:12:47,703
Please don't be weird about this.
346
00:12:47,736 --> 00:12:49,237
But it is a little weird!
347
00:12:49,270 --> 00:12:50,640
- It's a little bit weird?
- Mm-hmm.
348
00:12:50,673 --> 00:12:51,874
Is it a little bit weirder
349
00:12:51,906 --> 00:12:54,376
than you being paid to sit
in a box, like human veal,
350
00:12:54,409 --> 00:12:55,911
dressed like an anime character?
351
00:12:55,944 --> 00:12:57,246
Well, [scoffs] okay.
352
00:12:57,279 --> 00:13:00,283
I guess since it's
"real talk" time, I'll say it.
353
00:13:01,750 --> 00:13:03,318
What you're doing feels wrong.
354
00:13:03,351 --> 00:13:06,856
No, actually, it... it feels very wrong.
355
00:13:06,889 --> 00:13:09,826
Yeah, there she is!
356
00:13:09,858 --> 00:13:11,026
There's Judgmental Zoey.
357
00:13:11,059 --> 00:13:13,762
If it doesn't fit
in your little world view
358
00:13:13,795 --> 00:13:16,498
of what you think is okay,
you crap all over it.
359
00:13:16,531 --> 00:13:19,234
Well, if I'm so wrong,
then why is this some secret?
360
00:13:19,268 --> 00:13:21,003
I'm not doing this right now.
361
00:13:21,035 --> 00:13:23,271
Why? 'Cause you're doing our professor?
362
00:13:23,304 --> 00:13:26,943
♪♪
363
00:13:26,976 --> 00:13:28,878
It's kind of funny, isn't it?
364
00:13:28,910 --> 00:13:30,279
Hmm?
365
00:13:30,312 --> 00:13:33,216
It's actually the perfect job for you:
366
00:13:33,249 --> 00:13:37,887
doing nothing while looking
down on everybody else.
367
00:13:37,919 --> 00:13:43,391
♪♪
368
00:13:43,424 --> 00:13:48,897
♪♪
369
00:13:51,821 --> 00:13:54,770
Here's the weird thing
about human aquariums...
370
00:13:54,803 --> 00:13:56,438
Turns out you have a lot of time
371
00:13:56,472 --> 00:13:58,241
to think while you're inside one.
372
00:13:58,274 --> 00:14:01,476
And what I realized is that
I'd been acting pretty gross
373
00:14:01,510 --> 00:14:04,413
and stuck-up to my girls
about this whole work thing.
374
00:14:04,446 --> 00:14:08,117
And as much as I thought Nomi
was making some wrong decisions
375
00:14:08,150 --> 00:14:09,485
in her personal life,
376
00:14:09,518 --> 00:14:11,621
she was right about one thing...
377
00:14:11,654 --> 00:14:13,923
I was capable
of more than sitting in a box
378
00:14:13,956 --> 00:14:15,124
and looking pretty.
379
00:14:15,156 --> 00:14:17,893
[Sighs] Dude, it's so cold.
380
00:14:17,927 --> 00:14:19,128
Is it?
381
00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:20,496
Your teeth are chattering.
382
00:14:20,529 --> 00:14:21,630
No, this is arousal.
383
00:14:21,664 --> 00:14:22,999
This is what happens when I get aroused.
384
00:14:23,031 --> 00:14:24,099
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
385
00:14:24,132 --> 00:14:26,802
Um, I'm gonna do some recon,
get the blanket down,
386
00:14:26,836 --> 00:14:28,004
blood flowing, mood going.
387
00:14:28,036 --> 00:14:28,937
All right.
388
00:14:28,971 --> 00:14:31,774
Hold on. Okay.
389
00:14:31,807 --> 00:14:34,677
[Grunting]
390
00:14:34,709 --> 00:14:36,077
How is it?
391
00:14:36,111 --> 00:14:38,347
Uh, it's good, you know.
392
00:14:38,380 --> 00:14:40,448
Um, I mean, well, it's not much better.
393
00:14:40,481 --> 00:14:42,485
Okay, is the blanket down?
Because I'm coming in.
394
00:14:42,518 --> 00:14:43,986
Ana, hold up. Please.
395
00:14:44,019 --> 00:14:45,354
Okay. All right. What's up?
396
00:14:45,386 --> 00:14:48,023
- [Groans]
- What? Is something dead in there?!
397
00:14:48,057 --> 00:14:49,526
Yeah, romance.
398
00:14:50,726 --> 00:14:52,160
What are we doing?
399
00:14:52,193 --> 00:14:54,963
What are you talking about?
We're becoming real Titans.
400
00:14:54,996 --> 00:14:55,931
Yeah, but why?
401
00:14:55,965 --> 00:15:00,335
- Because it's fun?
- Is it?
402
00:15:00,369 --> 00:15:04,040
Well, no. So far, it's not.
403
00:15:04,073 --> 00:15:06,775
I don't know.
I just don't think that we...
404
00:15:06,808 --> 00:15:08,544
we should or that we have to.
405
00:15:08,577 --> 00:15:11,313
Do you not want to do it?
406
00:15:11,347 --> 00:15:14,382
Or do you just not want
to do it with me?
407
00:15:14,415 --> 00:15:17,886
What? No. I want to do it a lot,
408
00:15:17,919 --> 00:15:19,020
uh, with you everywhere.
409
00:15:19,053 --> 00:15:20,722
It's just, this place is a little...
410
00:15:20,755 --> 00:15:21,823
I don't know... beneath us.
411
00:15:21,856 --> 00:15:24,327
Beneath you, anyway.
412
00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:26,962
I'm sorry, but that is the nicest thing
413
00:15:26,996 --> 00:15:28,898
anyone has ever said to me...
414
00:15:28,930 --> 00:15:31,166
about public sex.
415
00:15:31,199 --> 00:15:33,401
Right.
416
00:15:33,434 --> 00:15:35,871
So, you want to get out of here?
417
00:15:35,904 --> 00:15:37,973
- Yeah.
- All right.
418
00:15:38,006 --> 00:15:40,409
You wanna get something to eat, then?
419
00:15:40,442 --> 00:15:44,046
Huh? No, I thought we could still,
420
00:15:44,078 --> 00:15:45,481
you know, do nasty stuff.
421
00:15:45,514 --> 00:15:46,883
Just wanna do it in a warm bed
422
00:15:46,915 --> 00:15:48,550
that doesn't smell like
bad decisions, you know?
423
00:15:48,583 --> 00:15:50,953
Oh, then we're definitely
just going to my room, then.
424
00:15:52,888 --> 00:15:54,390
What does that mean?
425
00:15:54,423 --> 00:15:58,193
♪♪
426
00:15:58,226 --> 00:16:00,996
[Sighs] So, I tried the job board again,
427
00:16:01,029 --> 00:16:02,899
and, as tempting as selling my eggs is,
428
00:16:02,932 --> 00:16:04,600
I needed to sell something
that wouldn't lead
429
00:16:04,632 --> 00:16:07,669
to a possible knock on my door
in eighteen years.
430
00:16:07,702 --> 00:16:10,539
Hey. Got you something.
431
00:16:10,572 --> 00:16:12,607
Most of these are used.
432
00:16:12,640 --> 00:16:15,010
Oh, no, I can promise you
they've never been used.
433
00:16:15,044 --> 00:16:17,746
- Okay.
- [Cash register beeping]
434
00:16:17,779 --> 00:16:22,851
Here's, uh, $38 for your troubles.
435
00:16:22,885 --> 00:16:25,288
What?! No! No, this is so not cool.
436
00:16:25,321 --> 00:16:26,856
What can I buy with this?
A carton of milk?
437
00:16:26,889 --> 00:16:28,090
I need more money.
438
00:16:28,122 --> 00:16:29,457
We're hiring.
439
00:16:29,491 --> 00:16:30,592
Ew.
440
00:16:32,794 --> 00:16:34,863
I was trying to give you the hook-up,
441
00:16:34,896 --> 00:16:38,967
but I see you're on your
little bougie tip, so... yeah.
442
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:40,702
I'm sorry. I...
That came off the wrong way.
443
00:16:40,736 --> 00:16:41,803
I didn't mean it like that.
444
00:16:41,837 --> 00:16:43,371
You did.
445
00:16:43,404 --> 00:16:46,708
Look, I'm not just here
to be stacking books.
446
00:16:46,741 --> 00:16:49,111
I'm studying the ins and outs
of running a business.
447
00:16:49,144 --> 00:16:51,547
Okay, but I'm not trying
to run a bookstore.
448
00:16:51,579 --> 00:16:52,981
I'm trying to run the fashion world,
449
00:16:53,015 --> 00:16:54,317
and... I don't know...
this just doesn't seem like
450
00:16:54,350 --> 00:16:55,885
the path to fashion greatness.
451
00:16:55,918 --> 00:16:59,422
Zoey, you're taking
a shortcut to the end game,
452
00:16:59,454 --> 00:17:01,790
but you're skipping your opening move.
453
00:17:01,823 --> 00:17:03,058
Okay, not true.
454
00:17:03,092 --> 00:17:04,893
I got a job at a great boutique,
455
00:17:04,927 --> 00:17:06,428
and, legit, all they wanted me to do
456
00:17:06,461 --> 00:17:08,997
was fold and refold
already-folded shirts.
457
00:17:09,031 --> 00:17:10,933
Great. Then you should
have folded the shit
458
00:17:10,966 --> 00:17:12,068
out of the T-shirts.
459
00:17:12,101 --> 00:17:14,570
But I saw the opportunity
to do something better.
460
00:17:14,602 --> 00:17:16,171
But that wasn't your job.
461
00:17:16,205 --> 00:17:19,574
Maybe if you would've done
your job and worked hard,
462
00:17:19,608 --> 00:17:20,842
they would've noticed,
463
00:17:20,876 --> 00:17:22,144
and you would have got an opportunity
464
00:17:22,177 --> 00:17:23,779
to do something doper.
465
00:17:23,812 --> 00:17:25,448
Building blocks to greatness...
466
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:28,483
patience and work ethic, B.
467
00:17:28,516 --> 00:17:31,786
♪♪
468
00:17:31,820 --> 00:17:33,489
Do they sell those here?
469
00:17:33,522 --> 00:17:37,159
I got thirty-eight dollars.
470
00:17:37,191 --> 00:17:38,326
Mm.
471
00:17:38,360 --> 00:17:40,295
Yeah, beds are better.
472
00:17:40,329 --> 00:17:42,264
Hot take on beds: They are dope.
473
00:17:42,296 --> 00:17:45,034
- [Sighs]
- For sure.
474
00:17:45,066 --> 00:17:49,371
Um, so, any regrets about last night?
475
00:17:49,405 --> 00:17:50,606
None.
476
00:17:50,639 --> 00:17:52,975
I mean, it would have been cool
477
00:17:53,007 --> 00:17:56,044
to etch our initials on the
Shield's wall of fame, but...
478
00:17:56,078 --> 00:17:57,113
- Yeah.
- ...it's okay.
479
00:17:57,146 --> 00:17:58,981
- I'll get over it.
- [Chuckles]
480
00:17:59,014 --> 00:18:02,717
[Chloe x Halle's "Who Knew" plays]
481
00:18:02,751 --> 00:18:04,120
[Marker rattles]
482
00:18:04,152 --> 00:18:05,520
What are you doing?
483
00:18:05,553 --> 00:18:07,023
[Marker scratching]
484
00:18:08,857 --> 00:18:10,192
There.
485
00:18:10,225 --> 00:18:11,694
Now we have our own wall of fame.
486
00:18:11,726 --> 00:18:13,896
There you go.
487
00:18:13,928 --> 00:18:17,132
Dude, did you just write on my lamp?
488
00:18:17,166 --> 00:18:20,202
Yeah. It's, uh, the lamp of fame now.
489
00:18:20,235 --> 00:18:21,871
"Double A."
490
00:18:21,903 --> 00:18:23,038
[Gasps]
491
00:18:23,072 --> 00:18:24,707
That could be our nickname.
492
00:18:24,739 --> 00:18:26,808
You know, like Kim-ye or Bey-Z.
493
00:18:26,842 --> 00:18:29,477
- Aww.
- Mm-hmm.
494
00:18:29,511 --> 00:18:32,181
- All good couples have one.
- Mm-hmm.
495
00:18:32,214 --> 00:18:37,186
♪ Who would have thought
that I could feel this way? ♪
496
00:18:37,218 --> 00:18:39,354
♪ This way about you ♪
497
00:18:39,388 --> 00:18:42,191
♪ Da-da-da, da-da, da-da ♪
498
00:18:42,224 --> 00:18:46,095
I realized I'd spent so long
trying to find the right job
499
00:18:46,128 --> 00:18:48,997
to fit my vibe, but what
I should have been doing
500
00:18:49,031 --> 00:18:51,367
was finding the right attitude
to fit the job.
501
00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:52,435
- Excuse me?
- Yeah?
502
00:18:52,467 --> 00:18:53,701
Do you know where I can find a copy
503
00:18:53,735 --> 00:18:55,504
of "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest"?
504
00:18:55,536 --> 00:18:57,038
That would be in fiction.
505
00:18:57,072 --> 00:18:59,007
But we also have the Blu-ray up front
506
00:18:59,041 --> 00:19:01,677
if you're anything like me
and lukewarm on reading.
507
00:19:01,709 --> 00:19:02,944
[Gasps] Oh!
508
00:19:02,977 --> 00:19:05,448
We have a sale on the "Keeping
it Tight-ans" tank tops.
509
00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:06,681
If you were to cut the collar
510
00:19:06,715 --> 00:19:08,284
and, like, knot
the extra fabric in the back,
511
00:19:08,316 --> 00:19:09,784
it'd look so cute on you.
512
00:19:09,817 --> 00:19:11,853
Thanks!
513
00:19:11,887 --> 00:19:13,121
Yeah. Over there.
514
00:19:13,155 --> 00:19:16,092
♪ But I get light
when you're talking to me ♪
515
00:19:16,124 --> 00:19:18,626
It wasn't the glam job I was hoping for,
516
00:19:18,659 --> 00:19:20,428
but it was the job I needed.
517
00:19:20,461 --> 00:19:24,199
Maybe taking an entry-level job
seriously and excelling at it
518
00:19:24,233 --> 00:19:26,135
- was my path to greatness.
- [Camera shutter clicks]
519
00:19:26,168 --> 00:19:27,902
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
520
00:19:27,936 --> 00:19:30,139
♪ You would say things,
wouldn't listen ♪
521
00:19:30,171 --> 00:19:32,475
♪ But I listen now ♪
522
00:19:32,507 --> 00:19:35,210
♪ You would call me, started falling ♪
523
00:19:35,244 --> 00:19:37,545
♪ 'Cause it's different now ♪
524
00:19:37,579 --> 00:19:39,664
♪ You would say things, I would listen ♪
525
00:19:39,689 --> 00:19:41,217
♪ I would listen ♪
526
00:19:43,651 --> 00:19:46,255
Ever heard of
the "Cal U Shield Challenge"?
527
00:19:46,287 --> 00:19:47,823
You're not a Titan 'til you've taken it!
528
00:19:47,855 --> 00:19:50,159
Nah. Hard pass.
529
00:19:50,191 --> 00:19:52,495
Hey, Queen. You interested
in becoming a Cal U legend?
530
00:19:52,527 --> 00:19:54,263
- With you?
- It's fine.
531
00:19:54,295 --> 00:19:56,131
Just let history forget about you.
532
00:19:56,165 --> 00:20:01,303
♪♪
533
00:20:01,335 --> 00:20:03,505
Are you trying to smash in there?
534
00:20:03,538 --> 00:20:05,240
Are you offering?
535
00:20:05,274 --> 00:20:07,075
Are you on the basketball team?
536
00:20:07,109 --> 00:20:08,644
Yes.
537
00:20:08,677 --> 00:20:10,346
Yes, I am.
538
00:20:10,379 --> 00:20:14,157
♪♪
539
00:20:14,182 --> 00:20:16,151
We goin' to Benihana!
540
00:20:16,175 --> 00:20:18,075
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
38929
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