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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,891 --> 00:00:04,451 (TRAM BELL DINGS) 2 00:00:05,266 --> 00:00:09,266 - Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT - - www.addic7ed.com - 3 00:00:11,171 --> 00:00:13,451 (PANTS) 4 00:00:16,291 --> 00:00:17,771 (SHUTTER CLICKS) 5 00:00:19,491 --> 00:00:20,971 (SHUTTER CLICKS) 6 00:00:22,531 --> 00:00:25,250 - (SHUTTER CLICKS) - (ROARS) 7 00:00:25,251 --> 00:00:27,890 - Mr. July. - (SHUTTER CLICKS) 8 00:00:27,891 --> 00:00:29,210 Mr. August. 9 00:00:29,211 --> 00:00:30,530 - (SHUTTER CLICKS) - Mr... 10 00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:33,131 - Come on now. - (SHUTTER CLICKS) 11 00:00:35,371 --> 00:00:37,690 Oh, well, here you go. 12 00:00:37,691 --> 00:00:39,450 (SHUTTER CLICKS) 13 00:00:39,451 --> 00:00:42,890 ♪ Anything can happen when you're just like me ♪ 14 00:00:42,891 --> 00:00:46,650 ♪ I'm running carelessly through a maze ♪ 15 00:00:46,651 --> 00:00:48,450 ♪ How unexpected. ♪ 16 00:00:48,451 --> 00:00:50,370 It's easier, you know, to... 17 00:00:50,371 --> 00:00:51,930 - (MESSAGE ALERT CHIMES) - Oh! 18 00:00:51,931 --> 00:00:54,250 - What was that? - No. What? No, nothing. 19 00:00:54,251 --> 00:00:56,130 Sexts. Good on you. 20 00:00:56,131 --> 00:00:58,410 No, we're not sexting. They're ironic. He's joking. 21 00:00:58,411 --> 00:01:00,610 - That's not funny. - Here, I'll be the judge of that. 22 00:01:00,611 --> 00:01:02,170 - No. - I am an expert now. 23 00:01:02,171 --> 00:01:04,090 You wouldn't believe what I'm seeing. 24 00:01:04,091 --> 00:01:06,090 What? What? What, what, what? Topless ladies? 25 00:01:06,091 --> 00:01:09,210 Yeah, heaps. I mean, I don't go for them, because they're obviously bi. 26 00:01:09,211 --> 00:01:10,930 You know, they're playing by hetero rules. 27 00:01:10,931 --> 00:01:12,890 - Well... Do you wanna see? - Yes. 28 00:01:12,891 --> 00:01:13,970 Yeah. (GIGGLES) 29 00:01:13,971 --> 00:01:16,290 How are you dating with a one-year-old? 30 00:01:16,291 --> 00:01:18,250 - There you go. - Wow. 31 00:01:18,251 --> 00:01:19,890 - Oh, pretty. - Oh. 32 00:01:19,891 --> 00:01:21,610 - Oh, not so pretty. - Whoa. 33 00:01:21,611 --> 00:01:22,970 - I'd date her. - Would you? 34 00:01:22,971 --> 00:01:25,130 Swipe right. Yes. That jacket. 35 00:01:25,131 --> 00:01:26,290 Oh, you should be careful though. 36 00:01:26,291 --> 00:01:28,690 Isn't online dating a little bit dangerous? 37 00:01:28,691 --> 00:01:30,170 They're all women. She's fine. 38 00:01:30,171 --> 00:01:33,410 - Who's the lesbian Weinstein? - I don't think we have one. 39 00:01:33,411 --> 00:01:35,130 Not enough women in positions of power. 40 00:01:35,131 --> 00:01:36,611 We'll get there one day. 41 00:01:37,748 --> 00:01:40,107 Hey, when do you start the new 42 00:01:40,108 --> 00:01:42,067 "I don't want to go to Adelaide" research job? 43 00:01:42,068 --> 00:01:44,387 This week. But it's just to fill a gap. 44 00:01:44,388 --> 00:01:47,307 Which I should make the most of. So it's a few weeks max. 45 00:01:47,308 --> 00:01:48,427 Need to sort child care though. 46 00:01:48,428 --> 00:01:50,187 Didn't realise I couldn't do it from home. 47 00:01:50,188 --> 00:01:52,627 What's that one called, the one that you don't use all the time? 48 00:01:52,628 --> 00:01:54,027 - Occasional. - Occasional. 49 00:01:54,028 --> 00:01:55,187 Oh, yeah. 50 00:01:55,188 --> 00:01:56,467 What ideology are you after? 51 00:01:56,468 --> 00:01:59,187 Traditional or Steiner or Montessori, Constructivist... 52 00:01:59,188 --> 00:02:01,387 Uh... really just one with long hours. 53 00:02:01,388 --> 00:02:03,667 - What do you recommend? - Whatever you can get. 54 00:02:03,668 --> 00:02:07,627 Just don't let her reaction make you feel guilty, because she'll cry. 55 00:02:07,628 --> 00:02:10,547 They all cry. You'll feel guilty anyway. 56 00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:12,467 Absolutely. What's the job? 57 00:02:12,468 --> 00:02:13,827 Oh, it's great. 58 00:02:13,828 --> 00:02:15,787 The council's trying to redefine public toilet spaces 59 00:02:15,788 --> 00:02:17,667 to accommodate all identities and genders, 60 00:02:17,668 --> 00:02:19,347 so I'm conducting a review 61 00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:21,787 into the feasibility of inclusive toilets. 62 00:02:21,788 --> 00:02:23,947 And I'll be assessing the current state of all the... 63 00:02:23,948 --> 00:02:25,267 Toilets? 64 00:02:25,268 --> 00:02:26,907 So, you're like an investigative janitor? 65 00:02:26,908 --> 00:02:28,427 - (LAUGHS) - No. 66 00:02:28,428 --> 00:02:30,947 I might knock this park over now. 67 00:02:30,948 --> 00:02:33,027 I need to wee anyway. Anyone want to come? 68 00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:36,333 Help stop Stevie touching the sanitary bins while I work? 69 00:02:36,334 --> 00:02:37,795 Anyone? 70 00:02:38,868 --> 00:02:42,347 Oh... sorry, morning sickness. 71 00:02:42,348 --> 00:02:45,657 I thought you said that had passed. It just came back. 72 00:02:48,708 --> 00:02:52,187 Do you think she got the tattoos before or after she had kids? 73 00:02:52,188 --> 00:02:53,796 Before. 74 00:02:55,828 --> 00:02:57,529 Is that Georgia? 75 00:02:58,588 --> 00:03:01,802 Yeah, it is. Who's she with? 76 00:03:03,148 --> 00:03:05,307 - Wow. - (CHUCKLES) 77 00:03:05,308 --> 00:03:07,052 - Hi. - Hey, guys. 78 00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:08,379 - Hi. - Hey. 79 00:03:08,380 --> 00:03:09,903 - Hey. - Hi. 80 00:03:09,904 --> 00:03:12,147 Is that another parents' group? 81 00:03:12,148 --> 00:03:13,667 Are you, like... Are you cheating on us? 82 00:03:13,668 --> 00:03:16,627 - (ALL LAUGH) - What? 83 00:03:16,628 --> 00:03:17,787 No. 84 00:03:17,788 --> 00:03:21,267 I mean, we never fully committed, did we? 85 00:03:21,268 --> 00:03:22,987 - No. No. - Oh... 86 00:03:22,988 --> 00:03:26,427 Oh, it's... it's a cultural thing. Yeah, I get it. 87 00:03:26,428 --> 00:03:28,627 (CLEARS THROAT) I understand. 88 00:03:28,628 --> 00:03:31,107 Yeah, but motherhood, pretty universal, isn't it? 89 00:03:31,108 --> 00:03:33,107 (LAUGHS) We're all in this shit-storm together. 90 00:03:33,108 --> 00:03:34,507 Wait, it's not because they're Asian. 91 00:03:34,508 --> 00:03:36,947 I mean, none of them are even my kind of Chinese. 92 00:03:36,948 --> 00:03:38,987 You know, it's just because we're more like-minded 93 00:03:38,988 --> 00:03:42,227 and generationally... closer. 94 00:03:42,228 --> 00:03:43,267 Yeah, sure. 95 00:03:43,268 --> 00:03:45,627 Yeah, 'cause you're, like, what? I mean, you're 30 or something. 96 00:03:45,628 --> 00:03:46,987 25. 25. 97 00:03:46,988 --> 00:03:48,587 And you guys are, like, you know, in your 40s. 98 00:03:48,588 --> 00:03:50,467 30s. (LAUGHS AWKWARDLY) 99 00:03:50,468 --> 00:03:52,947 - 36. - 30... 30... 30... 39. 100 00:03:52,948 --> 00:03:54,907 - 39. - Close enough. 101 00:03:54,908 --> 00:03:57,947 No, well... Audrey's sexting. 102 00:03:57,948 --> 00:03:59,987 - Well, yeah. Uh... - Well, Jeremy's kind of... 103 00:03:59,988 --> 00:04:01,587 - Now? - Well, he's away, so we just... 104 00:04:01,588 --> 00:04:03,187 It's very... 105 00:04:03,188 --> 00:04:04,747 - (LAUGHS) - And this one's dating again. 106 00:04:04,748 --> 00:04:06,267 - Oh, yes. - She is on the... 107 00:04:06,268 --> 00:04:08,467 - Oh, online? - Yeah, I'm swiping. 108 00:04:08,468 --> 00:04:10,307 It's left and right. 109 00:04:10,308 --> 00:04:12,707 - Cool. - Yeah, it is cool. 110 00:04:12,708 --> 00:04:14,147 - It's so nice to see you. - Really nice. 111 00:04:14,148 --> 00:04:16,307 - You guys, too. - Yeah. 112 00:04:16,308 --> 00:04:18,780 - Bye. - Bye, Georgia. 113 00:04:19,948 --> 00:04:21,387 - Wow. - Oh, wow. 114 00:04:21,388 --> 00:04:24,045 - Yeah. - That hurts. (LAUGHS UNCOMFORTABLY) 115 00:04:35,548 --> 00:04:37,028 (RINGS DOORBELL) 116 00:04:38,468 --> 00:04:39,947 (WOMAN SPEAKS GREEK) 117 00:04:39,948 --> 00:04:41,507 Nai? 118 00:04:41,508 --> 00:04:43,467 Sorry, I was just wondering if you do occasional care, 119 00:04:43,468 --> 00:04:44,747 and if you have any spots. 120 00:04:44,748 --> 00:04:46,627 - Nai. - No. OK. 121 00:04:46,628 --> 00:04:48,147 - Nai. - Oh, but you're nodding? 122 00:04:48,148 --> 00:04:50,027 - Nai. - Is that a... That... yes? 123 00:04:50,028 --> 00:04:52,307 Yes, we have availability. Come, come. 124 00:04:52,308 --> 00:04:53,947 Oh, great. OK. 125 00:04:53,948 --> 00:04:55,828 Thank you. (STRAINS) 126 00:04:57,468 --> 00:04:58,468 OK. 127 00:05:06,508 --> 00:05:07,988 You like? 128 00:05:09,988 --> 00:05:12,028 - (CHILD GROWLS) - Yeah, yeah. Yeah. 129 00:05:13,348 --> 00:05:17,347 (GROWLS AND SHOUTS) 130 00:05:17,348 --> 00:05:18,507 (SCREAMS) 131 00:05:18,508 --> 00:05:20,547 Uh, thank you so much. I'll be in touch. 132 00:05:20,548 --> 00:05:23,707 No, stop it. Yiayia said no. 133 00:05:23,708 --> 00:05:25,787 - No. - Goosie, no hitting. 134 00:05:25,788 --> 00:05:28,587 Uh... any availabilities? 135 00:05:28,588 --> 00:05:30,473 No, no, I've had the baby. 136 00:05:31,188 --> 00:05:33,427 Till 2022? Fuck off! 137 00:05:33,428 --> 00:05:35,347 - What? Oh. - (CALL DISCONNECTS) 138 00:05:35,348 --> 00:05:38,467 I can't hear you. I'm just asking about occasional care. 139 00:05:38,468 --> 00:05:40,427 No, I realise she'll be going to school then, 140 00:05:40,428 --> 00:05:42,307 but just put me on the list, thank you. 141 00:05:42,308 --> 00:05:46,107 My mother's father was adopted, so we don't know his full heritage. 142 00:05:46,108 --> 00:05:49,387 Well, her dad is very, VERY Catholic. 143 00:05:49,388 --> 00:05:52,427 Yeah, but hang on, there are not any priests there, are there? 144 00:05:52,428 --> 00:05:53,947 I mean, that's been sorted out? 145 00:05:53,948 --> 00:05:56,387 Do I have to join the gym or can I just drop her and go? 146 00:05:56,388 --> 00:05:57,947 She never really cries like this. 147 00:05:57,948 --> 00:05:59,747 - This is just... - (SCREAMS) 148 00:05:59,748 --> 00:06:01,680 What classes do you have at nine? 149 00:06:03,548 --> 00:06:04,867 Are they heavy weights, or... 150 00:06:04,868 --> 00:06:06,627 Thank you. 151 00:06:06,628 --> 00:06:08,388 (DOORBELL CHIMES) 152 00:06:09,828 --> 00:06:12,027 Hi again. We're back. 153 00:06:12,028 --> 00:06:13,747 Uh, thank you so much for fitting her in. 154 00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:17,867 And she rolls around a bit when you think she's waking up, 155 00:06:17,868 --> 00:06:20,587 but she just goes straight back to sleep, so don't be fooled. 156 00:06:20,588 --> 00:06:22,987 Go. Go! Go! 157 00:06:22,988 --> 00:06:24,147 - OK. Yep. - Go! 158 00:06:24,148 --> 00:06:25,628 Yep, I'm going. 159 00:06:28,348 --> 00:06:29,868 (SNIFFLES) 160 00:06:34,388 --> 00:06:35,948 (SIGHS) 161 00:06:46,788 --> 00:06:49,547 JEREMY: (ON PHONE) Hey, how'd she go? Did you get any more pics? 162 00:06:49,548 --> 00:06:51,907 Oh, dreamy. She couldn't have gone better. 163 00:06:51,908 --> 00:06:54,427 Really? How long did you stay? 164 00:06:54,428 --> 00:06:57,787 No, long enough. You know, she seemed really happy. 165 00:06:57,788 --> 00:07:00,107 - Yeah, right. - Oh, shit. Vegemite! 166 00:07:00,108 --> 00:07:02,187 But it's a good place. You think it's good, right? 167 00:07:02,188 --> 00:07:05,867 It's great. It's... stimulating and Steiner... ish. 168 00:07:05,868 --> 00:07:09,507 - What's it costing? - $450 a week. 169 00:07:09,508 --> 00:07:12,907 - And what are you earning now? - Just under five. 170 00:07:12,908 --> 00:07:14,947 So, we're almost paying for you to work. 171 00:07:14,948 --> 00:07:17,347 Ah, almost paying for us BOTH to work. 172 00:07:17,348 --> 00:07:19,587 Why are you making me feel guilty? 173 00:07:19,588 --> 00:07:22,027 Do you think Serena's husband made her feel guilty 174 00:07:22,028 --> 00:07:24,187 as she stepped out onto Rod Laver Arena for the women's final? 175 00:07:24,188 --> 00:07:27,467 No, but... it's not quite the same thing, is it? 176 00:07:27,468 --> 00:07:29,307 - Isn't it? - OK, Aud. 177 00:07:29,308 --> 00:07:32,867 I just wish that she was walking, 178 00:07:32,868 --> 00:07:36,467 so that she could at least walk away if she was being bullied. 179 00:07:36,468 --> 00:07:38,587 - (TOILET FLUSHES) - Oh, shit. 180 00:07:38,588 --> 00:07:40,667 I forgot to tell you, but she's taken some steps. 181 00:07:40,668 --> 00:07:42,147 - Are you serious?! - Yeah. 182 00:07:42,148 --> 00:07:45,067 I meant to video it, but my phone was full. 183 00:07:45,068 --> 00:07:49,987 Sorry. But, I mean, you'll see her walk heaps in her life. 184 00:07:49,988 --> 00:07:52,867 - How's your project going? - Oh, it's great. It's great. 185 00:07:52,868 --> 00:07:55,147 Thanks for the like. Finally. 186 00:07:55,148 --> 00:07:57,307 Huh? What are you talking about? 187 00:07:57,308 --> 00:08:00,627 The sexy photo that I sent you that you just liked. 188 00:08:00,628 --> 00:08:02,427 - Oh, that's disgusting. - I beg your pardon? 189 00:08:02,428 --> 00:08:05,022 No, I didn't like any photo. 190 00:08:05,023 --> 00:08:06,667 Hey, I've got to go. I'm working. 191 00:08:06,668 --> 00:08:08,590 - OK, love you. Bye. - Bye. 192 00:08:11,908 --> 00:08:17,587 (SHUTTER CLICKS CONTINUOUSLY) 193 00:08:17,588 --> 00:08:19,548 That's a pretty great shot, actually. 194 00:08:20,548 --> 00:08:22,188 Ah, that one's better. 195 00:08:31,348 --> 00:08:34,947 You think you're responsible enough to have a dog? 196 00:08:34,948 --> 00:08:36,307 No, I don't know if I'm ready. 197 00:08:36,308 --> 00:08:38,187 It's sort of like I've moved towards a child. 198 00:08:38,188 --> 00:08:40,147 Although I do keep being offered semen. 199 00:08:40,148 --> 00:08:43,227 I don't know if that's happened to you. Like, just unsolicited jizz. 200 00:08:43,228 --> 00:08:46,347 Like, "If you need some, I got some." I don't know what it is. 201 00:08:46,348 --> 00:08:50,347 It's like you hit 30 and every gay male friend expects you to breed. 202 00:08:50,348 --> 00:08:53,494 Like, "Oh, we'll co-parent." Like, that's not gonna end in court. 203 00:08:55,428 --> 00:08:57,947 Well, I actually have a son. 204 00:08:57,948 --> 00:09:02,507 Did I miss that on your profile? Because that does not excite me. 205 00:09:02,508 --> 00:09:04,187 Sorry. 206 00:09:04,188 --> 00:09:06,227 I think I'm well ahead in this competition actually. 207 00:09:06,228 --> 00:09:08,507 Ah, well, why would you say that? 208 00:09:08,508 --> 00:09:10,627 I don't like modern art. 209 00:09:10,628 --> 00:09:13,467 - Oh. - I like the old stuff. 210 00:09:13,468 --> 00:09:15,467 OK, then maybe you are worse, then. 211 00:09:15,468 --> 00:09:17,867 No, I don't like camping. 212 00:09:17,868 --> 00:09:21,707 And, yes, I have never owned a pair of overalls. 213 00:09:21,708 --> 00:09:23,147 - Oh, yeah, that is good. - Yeah. 214 00:09:23,148 --> 00:09:24,987 Because I do, I love camping 215 00:09:24,988 --> 00:09:28,067 and I was actually going to wear my evening overalls tonight. 216 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,627 - Evening overalls? - To meet you. 217 00:09:29,628 --> 00:09:31,667 - Just kidding, I own heaps. - Fuck, that's... 218 00:09:31,668 --> 00:09:34,747 - No, you look beautiful. - Oh, thanks, thanks. Yeah. 219 00:09:34,748 --> 00:09:36,467 - Shall we, uh... - Yeah. 220 00:09:36,468 --> 00:09:38,770 - Yeah. Another one? - Yeah, thanks. 221 00:09:39,388 --> 00:09:41,507 (FOOTSTEPS APPROACH) 222 00:09:41,508 --> 00:09:42,907 - Oh, hey! - Hi. 223 00:09:42,908 --> 00:09:46,467 - How'd you go? - Excellent. Scored a second date! 224 00:09:46,468 --> 00:09:48,187 Oh, that's great. 225 00:09:48,188 --> 00:09:50,227 (LAUGHS) All good here? 226 00:09:50,228 --> 00:09:52,267 Yeah, really good. He's so cute. 227 00:09:52,268 --> 00:09:54,107 He called me dude! 228 00:09:54,108 --> 00:09:57,029 Oh, no, 'doodh' is Hindi for milk. 229 00:09:57,030 --> 00:09:59,067 Oh, right. 230 00:09:59,068 --> 00:10:01,054 Yeah, right, that makes sense. 231 00:10:01,055 --> 00:10:04,827 It was when I was giving him his bottle, so... yeah. 232 00:10:04,828 --> 00:10:07,747 Hey, listen, I was gonna say, if it's easier for you, 233 00:10:07,748 --> 00:10:10,107 I'd be happy for him to do a sleepover at my place. 234 00:10:10,108 --> 00:10:13,027 Certainly easier for me. 235 00:10:13,028 --> 00:10:15,427 Oh, thanks, Dave. 236 00:10:15,428 --> 00:10:17,147 But he's not really ready yet. 237 00:10:17,148 --> 00:10:19,227 And he's actually still up through the night. 238 00:10:19,228 --> 00:10:21,707 Oh, no, no, no, that's fine. 239 00:10:21,708 --> 00:10:23,516 Yeah, that's fine. Um... 240 00:10:24,308 --> 00:10:26,427 OK, well, I should get going. 241 00:10:26,428 --> 00:10:29,028 - Thanks, Dave. - (PHONE RINGS) 242 00:10:30,708 --> 00:10:33,939 Oh, actually, can you just hang around a sec? It's Ranjeet. 243 00:10:33,940 --> 00:10:35,547 I really should get going. 244 00:10:35,548 --> 00:10:37,147 Please, please. 245 00:10:37,148 --> 00:10:39,050 Hey. How's things? 246 00:10:39,051 --> 00:10:42,187 Good. Parents are coming round for dinner. 247 00:10:42,188 --> 00:10:44,438 Thought I'd sneak in a quick call before they get here. 248 00:10:46,748 --> 00:10:49,307 I think they need to meet Dave and then they'll be fine. 249 00:10:49,308 --> 00:10:51,250 And a wedding date would help. 250 00:11:00,988 --> 00:11:03,987 It won't. And last time Ma almost had a heart attack. 251 00:11:03,988 --> 00:11:06,227 And didn't talk to me for two years. 252 00:11:06,228 --> 00:11:09,507 She was just upset you didn't finish your medical degree. 253 00:11:09,508 --> 00:11:10,907 It's what we Anands do, 254 00:11:10,908 --> 00:11:15,292 we become doctors and then we marry, preferably doctors. 255 00:11:16,428 --> 00:11:18,947 - Here's Dave. - Hello, David. 256 00:11:18,948 --> 00:11:20,987 Hi, Ranjeet. 257 00:11:20,988 --> 00:11:22,827 - How's Perth? - Hot, mate. 258 00:11:22,828 --> 00:11:24,867 Yeah, is it? I bet. 259 00:11:24,868 --> 00:11:27,187 Well, great catching up with you. 260 00:11:27,188 --> 00:11:29,066 Uh... See ya. 261 00:11:29,948 --> 00:11:32,747 OK, so, how's Daadi Maa? 262 00:11:32,748 --> 00:11:34,954 She's getting old. 263 00:11:37,428 --> 00:11:38,908 BABY: Yiayia. 264 00:11:40,388 --> 00:11:41,627 Yeah. 265 00:11:41,628 --> 00:11:43,308 Did she just call you Yiayia? 266 00:11:44,428 --> 00:11:45,428 Go. 267 00:11:45,429 --> 00:11:46,667 I am going. 268 00:11:46,668 --> 00:11:48,308 Go. 269 00:11:53,188 --> 00:11:55,987 Hey, the women's is free if you girls really need to go. 270 00:11:55,988 --> 00:11:57,787 We don't identify as female. 271 00:11:57,788 --> 00:12:00,878 Or male either. We don't like binary labels. 272 00:12:01,748 --> 00:12:04,482 Absolutely. Sorry. That's really cool. 273 00:12:04,868 --> 00:12:08,284 Actually, I might identify as female, just for a sec. Busting. 274 00:12:11,828 --> 00:12:14,107 - (SNAPS FINGERS) Audrey! - Scott! 275 00:12:14,108 --> 00:12:16,347 - How are you going? - Are you non-binary now? 276 00:12:16,348 --> 00:12:18,587 Hey? No, that's just the roomiest one. 277 00:12:18,588 --> 00:12:20,838 It's alright, fellas, the coast is clear. Come out. 278 00:12:22,548 --> 00:12:25,347 See you next Thursday. And remember, Rat Park. 279 00:12:25,348 --> 00:12:26,834 - Yeah. - Remember. 280 00:12:28,028 --> 00:12:31,337 What? Hey, could you be quick, please? I've got a 3:30 in a minute. 281 00:12:32,708 --> 00:12:35,227 - What? - Did you just... Is that a... 282 00:12:35,228 --> 00:12:37,747 Office. Yeah, that is my office. That's correct. Yes, it is. 283 00:12:37,748 --> 00:12:40,027 Well, I'll be telling the council that their attempt to create a safe 284 00:12:40,028 --> 00:12:41,747 gender-neutral toilet space has failed. 285 00:12:41,748 --> 00:12:44,067 - How's that? - Being used as a crack shop. 286 00:12:44,068 --> 00:12:46,747 - Nice one. - Crack shop? What's a crack shop? 287 00:12:46,748 --> 00:12:50,067 Don't catastrophise, Audrey. That's genuinely my office, alright? 288 00:12:50,068 --> 00:12:52,347 I'm off the gear. Did you not know that? 289 00:12:52,348 --> 00:12:53,747 I'm completely clean. 290 00:12:53,748 --> 00:12:56,507 Like, completely against the odds, I've done it. A hero's journey. 291 00:12:56,508 --> 00:12:58,907 And now I'm giving back to the community. I'm helping others. 292 00:12:58,908 --> 00:13:02,307 I developed my own 12-step program, but I do it in six for 50 bucks. 293 00:13:02,308 --> 00:13:04,267 Well, that's still unethical. NA's free. 294 00:13:04,268 --> 00:13:05,268 I've no idea. 295 00:13:05,269 --> 00:13:06,587 Anyway, it's good you're off the drugs. 296 00:13:06,588 --> 00:13:09,147 If you're going to be talking to those arse clowns at city council, 297 00:13:09,148 --> 00:13:11,227 could you tell them all the lights at Cooper Park are gone? 298 00:13:11,228 --> 00:13:13,667 Completely. It's black there. Like, they're all smashed out, 299 00:13:13,668 --> 00:13:15,267 and it's fucking dangerous, to be honest. 300 00:13:15,268 --> 00:13:16,387 - All the lights? - All of them. 301 00:13:16,388 --> 00:13:18,267 And I feel unsafe there. Put "unsafe". 302 00:13:18,268 --> 00:13:20,867 - Where's your little fella? - At day care. 303 00:13:20,868 --> 00:13:22,627 Ooh, a bit young, isn't he? Is he talking yet? 304 00:13:22,628 --> 00:13:23,787 A few words. 305 00:13:23,788 --> 00:13:25,987 What if something bad happens and he can't tell you about it? 306 00:13:25,988 --> 00:13:27,956 - Scott, he is a girl. - Is he? 307 00:13:29,696 --> 00:13:32,467 Sorry. No, I was talking about my one-year-old, 308 00:13:32,468 --> 00:13:36,027 who may identify as a boy in the future, or as non-binary. 309 00:13:36,028 --> 00:13:38,347 I'm very open for them to make that call. 310 00:13:38,348 --> 00:13:40,187 Yep. His choice, her choice. Doesn't matter. 311 00:13:40,188 --> 00:13:43,118 Off you fuck, the adults are talking. 312 00:13:43,119 --> 00:13:44,386 Tricky at that age, aren't they? 313 00:13:44,387 --> 00:13:46,707 Actually, can you tell me more about the loos at Cooper Park? 314 00:13:46,708 --> 00:13:48,427 - That might save me a visit. - Sure. 315 00:13:48,428 --> 00:13:50,267 - Great. - I'm actually heading there shortly. 316 00:13:50,268 --> 00:13:53,080 I can give you an update. Have I got your digits? 317 00:13:53,988 --> 00:13:55,907 - No. - Hit me. 318 00:13:55,908 --> 00:13:59,627 Oh... no, I just don't know if I should give it to you. 319 00:13:59,628 --> 00:14:00,903 Yeah. None taken. 320 00:14:02,828 --> 00:14:06,507 Oh, alright. 0423 6071 605. 321 00:14:06,508 --> 00:14:08,267 605. You're going to regret that. 322 00:14:08,268 --> 00:14:11,187 No, I'm kidding. It's safe... ish. No, I'm kidding. 323 00:14:11,188 --> 00:14:13,867 I'll call you and we'll talk about payment plans and what have you. 324 00:14:13,868 --> 00:14:15,107 - OK. - Take care. 325 00:14:15,108 --> 00:14:17,707 Good to see you, Scott. Ooh, dress shoes. 326 00:14:17,708 --> 00:14:20,587 Yeah, nice, innit? Business. 327 00:14:20,588 --> 00:14:22,748 You know, walk the walk, talk the talk. 328 00:14:24,268 --> 00:14:25,467 Dinner's almost ready, 329 00:14:25,468 --> 00:14:29,747 and then do you mind sticking around and just saying hello to Ranjeet? 330 00:14:29,748 --> 00:14:33,467 Because it's his birthday. And then I've got my second date. 331 00:14:33,468 --> 00:14:35,867 I don't think that's a good idea. I'm such a terrible liar. 332 00:14:35,868 --> 00:14:38,107 And besides, don't you think it's time you told him? 333 00:14:38,108 --> 00:14:40,667 - I mean, he seems cool. - Told him what? 334 00:14:40,668 --> 00:14:42,867 Told him that we're not a couple! 335 00:14:42,868 --> 00:14:45,267 That we're definitely never getting married, 336 00:14:45,268 --> 00:14:49,581 and, I don't know, that it's 2019 and you're gay. 337 00:14:50,628 --> 00:14:52,250 On his birthday? 338 00:14:53,188 --> 00:14:57,767 No, you just don't understand. No, we come from very different worlds. 339 00:14:57,768 --> 00:15:01,067 Yeah, but didn't India just decriminalise... 340 00:15:01,068 --> 00:15:03,767 Oh, OK, yeah, fine! I will Skype him later. 341 00:15:03,768 --> 00:15:05,007 (PHONE CHIMES) 342 00:15:08,428 --> 00:15:10,427 Hey? 343 00:15:10,428 --> 00:15:14,706 Do you think that you're really ready for a sleepover? 344 00:15:15,867 --> 00:15:19,283 Because, um... maybe I was wrong. 345 00:15:20,748 --> 00:15:22,547 How's tonight? 346 00:15:22,548 --> 00:15:24,827 You mean TONIGHT tonight? 347 00:15:24,828 --> 00:15:26,827 Yeah. Do you want the play mat? 348 00:15:26,828 --> 00:15:28,187 'Cause I can just... I just... 349 00:15:28,188 --> 00:15:30,427 Yeah, just put his toys in the middle and... 350 00:15:30,428 --> 00:15:33,987 Oh, um, what do I do if he wakes in the night? 351 00:15:33,988 --> 00:15:35,587 He won't. 352 00:15:35,588 --> 00:15:38,867 And if he does, you just hold him... 353 00:15:38,868 --> 00:15:41,268 ...and rock him for an hour. 354 00:15:42,308 --> 00:15:44,683 - Or two. - OK. 355 00:15:47,588 --> 00:15:49,228 Oh, my... 356 00:15:52,708 --> 00:15:54,547 Mmm. 357 00:15:54,548 --> 00:15:56,867 I'm so... I'm so busting for the loo. 358 00:15:56,868 --> 00:15:58,627 Oh, really?! OK, yeah, sure. 359 00:15:58,628 --> 00:16:00,827 No, that's fine. It's just up there. 360 00:16:00,828 --> 00:16:02,787 - OK, alright. OK. - OK, bye. 361 00:16:02,788 --> 00:16:04,268 Oh. Oh, my gosh. 362 00:16:06,108 --> 00:16:07,588 Ay-ay-ay-ay. 363 00:16:29,908 --> 00:16:33,596 - Everything good? - Yeah, yeah. I'll just be a sec. 364 00:16:43,628 --> 00:16:45,574 (DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES) 365 00:16:49,108 --> 00:16:51,580 - Are you OK? - Yeah, I'm fine. 366 00:16:52,668 --> 00:16:55,897 So, why is there, um, nappies in the bathroom? 367 00:16:56,508 --> 00:16:58,507 What? Well, that's strange. 368 00:16:58,508 --> 00:17:02,182 Mm. And a dummy in the vanity. 369 00:17:03,668 --> 00:17:07,087 OK... bit weird. 370 00:17:08,188 --> 00:17:12,627 My last girlfriend had a baby fetish. 371 00:17:12,628 --> 00:17:14,307 Yeah. (LAUGHS) 372 00:17:14,308 --> 00:17:18,721 There is a full nursery set up in the second bedroom. 373 00:17:20,068 --> 00:17:23,187 (STAMMERS) It was a bit intense. 374 00:17:23,188 --> 00:17:24,827 And I really should get rid of that stuff. 375 00:17:24,828 --> 00:17:27,507 Yeah, there's actually a photo of you in there 376 00:17:27,508 --> 00:17:30,660 literally moments after giving birth. 377 00:17:31,348 --> 00:17:33,605 - That's not me. - Yeah, that is. 378 00:17:35,748 --> 00:17:37,827 - It is. - Mmm. 379 00:17:37,828 --> 00:17:41,147 I... have... a... 380 00:17:41,148 --> 00:17:42,227 ...one-year-old. 381 00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:45,427 Yeah. Yeah, I thought that you might. 382 00:17:45,428 --> 00:17:46,547 (BOTH LAUGH) 383 00:17:46,548 --> 00:17:48,978 So, why did you lie to me? That's not cool. 384 00:17:50,588 --> 00:17:54,387 Well, snooping through my apartment, that's not very cool either. 385 00:17:54,388 --> 00:17:56,467 I mean, you know, my bathroom vanity? 386 00:17:56,468 --> 00:17:59,947 - Yeah, everybody does that, so... - In the movies, sure. But not... 387 00:17:59,948 --> 00:18:02,147 OK, I don't think that this is going to work, 388 00:18:02,148 --> 00:18:04,747 so I'm going to leave. 389 00:18:04,748 --> 00:18:06,467 - Oh, well... - OK. 390 00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:11,987 Why am I the only lesbian who likes babies? 391 00:18:11,988 --> 00:18:14,907 Oh, no, I like babies, I just don't like liars. 392 00:18:14,908 --> 00:18:16,491 Goodnight. 393 00:18:21,868 --> 00:18:23,348 (DOOR CLOSES) 394 00:18:31,908 --> 00:18:35,827 Sorry. Sorry, she just won't let go. Is this normal? 395 00:18:35,828 --> 00:18:37,907 Completely normal. Come to Yiayia. 396 00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:40,067 - Come. Come to Yiayia. - Come on, come on. 397 00:18:40,068 --> 00:18:42,547 - Come on. Come on. - (CRIES) 398 00:18:42,548 --> 00:18:45,107 Come to Yiayia. Oh, there, there, there, there, there. 399 00:18:45,108 --> 00:18:47,987 (COOS) 400 00:18:47,988 --> 00:18:50,827 Go, go, go. Go. Look at this. 401 00:18:50,828 --> 00:18:52,427 Look at this. 402 00:18:52,428 --> 00:18:54,147 Yeah, not so good today. 403 00:18:54,148 --> 00:18:56,427 She's already worn down by the 9-to-5 cycle. 404 00:18:56,428 --> 00:18:57,947 JEREMY: Yeah, well, I don't blame her. 405 00:18:57,948 --> 00:19:00,907 Yeah, I think she's really smart. Hey, where are you? It's echoey. 406 00:19:00,908 --> 00:19:03,747 Hang on, I'll take a pic. 407 00:19:03,748 --> 00:19:05,827 - (SHUTTER CLICKS) - There you go. 408 00:19:05,828 --> 00:19:07,867 (SENT ALERT CHIMES) 409 00:19:07,868 --> 00:19:08,975 Oh, God! 410 00:19:10,388 --> 00:19:12,827 Jeremy! It's 9am! Yuck. 411 00:19:12,828 --> 00:19:15,907 That was just a joke one. I thought you'd laugh. 412 00:19:15,908 --> 00:19:18,547 Besides, why are you liking it, if you think it's so yuck? 413 00:19:18,548 --> 00:19:20,227 I didn't. And I won't. 414 00:19:20,228 --> 00:19:22,467 Yeah, you did. And now you're commenting. 415 00:19:22,468 --> 00:19:24,189 Emoji, thumbs up! 416 00:19:25,308 --> 00:19:28,495 Oh, fuck! Does Verity still have access to your iPad? 417 00:19:29,508 --> 00:19:31,987 - Oh, God. - Excellent, Aud. 418 00:19:31,988 --> 00:19:35,147 Your mum's just received and liked a picture of my penis. 419 00:19:35,148 --> 00:19:37,707 Well, at least she liked it. No, sorry. I'll sort that. 420 00:19:37,708 --> 00:19:38,947 Audrey! 421 00:19:38,948 --> 00:19:41,307 Oh, I better go. Yiayia's shooing me away. 422 00:19:41,308 --> 00:19:43,987 Alright, alright. Yeah, I'm going. 423 00:19:43,988 --> 00:19:46,724 No, no, today you come. You take. 424 00:19:48,228 --> 00:19:50,947 She's been rejected. I didn't know that could happen. 425 00:19:50,948 --> 00:19:53,065 Oh, man, I better go. Bye. 426 00:19:57,748 --> 00:19:59,387 Hello, mate. 427 00:19:59,388 --> 00:20:02,202 So, it's hand, foot and mouth. 428 00:20:04,428 --> 00:20:07,947 In 2019? Sounds like something from Oliver Twist. 429 00:20:07,948 --> 00:20:10,907 It's very common with little ones at childcare. 430 00:20:10,908 --> 00:20:12,667 It will clear up by itself. 431 00:20:12,668 --> 00:20:16,307 But you need to quarantine the two of you for the next 10 days. 432 00:20:16,308 --> 00:20:18,987 I'm sorry, did you just say 10 days' quarantine? 433 00:20:18,988 --> 00:20:20,947 This is perfectly normal. 434 00:20:20,948 --> 00:20:22,787 She'd get sick no matter where you sent her. 435 00:20:22,788 --> 00:20:26,987 Everyone should expect rolling illness for the first six months. 436 00:20:26,988 --> 00:20:29,439 Oh, and you're due for your pap smear. 437 00:20:30,748 --> 00:20:33,267 Oh, good. Great news. 438 00:20:33,268 --> 00:20:34,747 Hello, darling! 439 00:20:34,748 --> 00:20:37,627 I'm maintaining my distance because we've just been quarantined, 440 00:20:37,628 --> 00:20:40,027 but also because I'm so mad at you. 441 00:20:40,028 --> 00:20:42,827 Liking those photos. That's way out of line. Even for you. 442 00:20:42,828 --> 00:20:44,267 Darling, I had to like them. 443 00:20:44,268 --> 00:20:45,707 It's a very vulnerable thing, 444 00:20:45,708 --> 00:20:47,947 you can't leave them hanging out like that. 445 00:20:47,948 --> 00:20:49,387 Literally hanging out. 446 00:20:49,388 --> 00:20:50,907 OK, Mum, give me the iPad? 447 00:20:50,908 --> 00:20:52,747 I won't read your messages anymore. I promise. 448 00:20:52,748 --> 00:20:55,227 (LAUGHS) Like my diary when I was 12? 449 00:20:55,228 --> 00:20:56,427 I'm not falling for that again. 450 00:20:56,428 --> 00:20:58,067 Audrey, I don't want to read your messages, 451 00:20:58,068 --> 00:20:59,627 they just keep popping up. 452 00:20:59,628 --> 00:21:00,907 Can't we turn the thing off? 453 00:21:00,908 --> 00:21:03,947 I don't know! You need to get off my cloud. 454 00:21:03,948 --> 00:21:05,227 Ruben! 455 00:21:05,228 --> 00:21:07,387 What? Oh, hi, Aud. 456 00:21:07,388 --> 00:21:10,387 - What's he doing here? - I was just assembling a flat pack. 457 00:21:10,388 --> 00:21:12,667 I was going to say hi, but it sounded private. 458 00:21:12,668 --> 00:21:15,667 Cloud work? You bet. Now? 459 00:21:15,668 --> 00:21:19,820 But upstairs. I need to isolate myself from you. 460 00:21:20,628 --> 00:21:24,387 Audrey! Does he not know it doesn't work if you're flaccid? 461 00:21:24,388 --> 00:21:26,827 He needs to be erect. 462 00:21:26,828 --> 00:21:28,671 Yeah, you're right. It should be erect. 463 00:21:30,266 --> 00:21:32,253 You should be safe out there. 464 00:21:33,068 --> 00:21:35,174 OK, what's your cloud password? 465 00:21:35,868 --> 00:21:38,187 Oh, what? 466 00:21:38,188 --> 00:21:40,227 - (KNOCKS) Audrey? - Yeah, no idea. 467 00:21:40,228 --> 00:21:42,667 Don't worry. 468 00:21:42,668 --> 00:21:45,147 - (MESSAGE ALERT CHIMES) - Was that a text message? 469 00:21:45,148 --> 00:21:46,547 - Yeah. - Oh, shit. 470 00:21:46,548 --> 00:21:48,507 I'm so sorry you had to see that. 471 00:21:48,508 --> 00:21:50,947 He's really missing me, 472 00:21:50,948 --> 00:21:52,827 and he likes to use visual aids. 473 00:21:52,828 --> 00:21:56,227 And he's been climbing, so he's showing off his bottom. 474 00:21:56,228 --> 00:21:58,427 - Which is looking quite good. - (LAUGHS) 475 00:21:58,428 --> 00:22:01,427 No, it was just a message re your new password. 476 00:22:01,428 --> 00:22:04,227 Oh. Oh, good. (CLEARS THROAT) 477 00:22:04,228 --> 00:22:06,387 How's StevieNicks16? 478 00:22:06,388 --> 00:22:08,067 Oh, that's great. I'll remember that. 479 00:22:08,068 --> 00:22:09,907 No judgement, by the way. 480 00:22:09,908 --> 00:22:12,111 Who doesn't love a climbing bottom? 481 00:22:12,828 --> 00:22:15,187 You joining him after the toilet job? 482 00:22:15,188 --> 00:22:17,707 Yeah, if he passes probation. 483 00:22:17,708 --> 00:22:19,867 Has anyone ever not passed probation? 484 00:22:19,868 --> 00:22:21,787 Yeah, I just want to be 100% sure. 485 00:22:21,788 --> 00:22:23,907 And I've got the gender neutral project and... 486 00:22:23,908 --> 00:22:25,867 Oh, fuck, how am I going to finish that? 487 00:22:25,868 --> 00:22:27,787 Oh, my God, it's due next week. 488 00:22:27,788 --> 00:22:30,104 (GROANS) 489 00:22:30,668 --> 00:22:32,947 What am I doing, Ruben? 490 00:22:32,948 --> 00:22:35,067 Putting her in an infectious childcare. 491 00:22:35,068 --> 00:22:37,067 Making Jeremy cancel his trip home. 492 00:22:37,068 --> 00:22:40,467 Because what's the point? So now he's sad and very frustrated. 493 00:22:40,468 --> 00:22:41,987 All for toilets. 494 00:22:41,988 --> 00:22:46,707 I reckon you and Jeremy just need a date night or a dirty weekend. 495 00:22:46,708 --> 00:22:48,027 Ester swears by them. 496 00:22:48,028 --> 00:22:50,499 Although ours are getting cleaner and cleaner. 497 00:22:51,788 --> 00:22:53,868 Actually, it's been a while for us, too. 498 00:22:55,668 --> 00:22:59,027 Maybe we could do a double dirty week... 499 00:22:59,028 --> 00:23:01,549 No. No, people don't do that. 500 00:23:02,908 --> 00:23:05,467 OK, I've set Verity up with her own cloud, 501 00:23:05,468 --> 00:23:08,267 and locked yours. 502 00:23:08,268 --> 00:23:10,867 So sext away! 503 00:23:10,868 --> 00:23:12,547 Thank you. 504 00:23:12,548 --> 00:23:14,188 What's your new password? 505 00:23:16,788 --> 00:23:20,307 Nope. Oh, has it got something to do with Fleetwood Mac? 506 00:23:20,308 --> 00:23:22,987 - Mm. - Was it... Give me another clue. 507 00:23:22,988 --> 00:23:25,347 Fleetwood Mac's a pretty good clue. 508 00:23:25,348 --> 00:23:27,107 I mean... 509 00:23:27,108 --> 00:23:29,427 What's her name... Oh, what's her name again? 510 00:23:29,428 --> 00:23:32,067 It's literally the same name as your child, 511 00:23:32,068 --> 00:23:33,913 but with a Fleetwood Mac... 512 00:23:35,508 --> 00:23:36,707 Oh, shit. 513 00:23:36,708 --> 00:23:39,667 DAVE: Come on, you can do it. Do it for Teddy. 514 00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:41,987 OK, OK. Here I go. 515 00:23:41,988 --> 00:23:44,387 (RINGING TONE) 516 00:23:44,388 --> 00:23:46,227 RANJEET: Ah, Madu. Hi. 517 00:23:46,228 --> 00:23:47,987 Hey, um... 518 00:23:47,988 --> 00:23:49,427 Hey. 519 00:23:49,428 --> 00:23:52,027 - How were the birthday celebrations? - Wonderful. 520 00:23:52,028 --> 00:23:53,227 Wish you could have been here. 521 00:23:53,228 --> 00:23:56,827 Yeah, look, I've got something to tell you. 522 00:23:56,828 --> 00:24:00,718 It's just that Dave's actually 523 00:24:00,719 --> 00:24:03,292 Teddy's sperm donor. 524 00:24:03,293 --> 00:24:06,147 And we're not getting married. 525 00:24:06,148 --> 00:24:08,227 OK, Madu, you might want to talk... 526 00:24:08,228 --> 00:24:10,627 ...because I'm... 527 00:24:10,628 --> 00:24:13,947 We're not together 'cause... 528 00:24:13,948 --> 00:24:16,930 (STAMMERS) We can talk about this another time. 529 00:24:19,228 --> 00:24:20,988 - Yeah, I like women. - Oh, boy. 530 00:24:23,388 --> 00:24:25,467 (WOMAN GASPS) 531 00:24:25,468 --> 00:24:28,347 Do you realise what shame you bring to the family?! 532 00:24:28,348 --> 00:24:29,587 No way! They're there. 533 00:24:29,588 --> 00:24:32,107 Oh, where is she? I can't see her. 534 00:24:32,108 --> 00:24:34,747 - He's there. - Madu? Madu?! 535 00:24:34,748 --> 00:24:36,427 - Talk to them. - Where is she? 536 00:24:36,428 --> 00:24:38,747 I can only see a blank. 537 00:24:38,748 --> 00:24:40,627 Oh, what's going on? 538 00:24:40,628 --> 00:24:42,427 Are you trying to kill us? 539 00:24:42,428 --> 00:24:44,747 It's not a crime anymore. It's legal, Ma. 540 00:24:44,748 --> 00:24:46,587 (SPEAKS HINDI) 541 00:24:46,588 --> 00:24:49,667 What kind of Anand doesn't finish her medical degree? 542 00:24:49,668 --> 00:24:52,881 Even your dumb cousin is now a dentist. 543 00:24:54,348 --> 00:24:56,507 AUDREY: OK, come on, darling. Come on, come to Mum. 544 00:24:56,508 --> 00:24:57,508 Come to Mum. Come to Mum. 545 00:24:57,509 --> 00:24:59,867 Yeah, I need to get you walking for Daddy. 546 00:24:59,868 --> 00:25:02,067 Yeah, I know you're sick, but please... 547 00:25:02,068 --> 00:25:03,588 - (PHONE RINGS) - Oh! 548 00:25:04,948 --> 00:25:06,627 Oh. Hi. 549 00:25:06,628 --> 00:25:10,227 Yeah, g'day. How you going? Listen, I'm at the Kent Street ones. 550 00:25:10,228 --> 00:25:12,587 You don't want to see this. People are animals. 551 00:25:12,588 --> 00:25:14,907 And I'm guessing your standards are low, very low. 552 00:25:14,908 --> 00:25:16,667 Oh, what, because I'm a reformed drug dealer? 553 00:25:16,668 --> 00:25:18,707 I'd watch that, that's prejudice, OK? 554 00:25:18,708 --> 00:25:21,987 No, because your office is a toilet. Anyway, have a look. 555 00:25:21,988 --> 00:25:24,387 Hang on. There we go. 556 00:25:24,388 --> 00:25:27,347 - Did you get any interviews at all? - Well, yeah. 557 00:25:27,348 --> 00:25:28,787 Generally, the women are thumbs down. 558 00:25:28,788 --> 00:25:30,627 I mean, they just don't want to be anywhere near 559 00:25:30,628 --> 00:25:32,467 the urinal cakes and man poos. 560 00:25:32,468 --> 00:25:34,227 Oh, fair enough. What about the men? 561 00:25:34,228 --> 00:25:36,307 - Oh, no, no, no. The men's is a beat. - Oh, wow. 562 00:25:36,308 --> 00:25:37,747 (LAUGHS) 563 00:25:37,748 --> 00:25:39,467 That's what those noises were. 564 00:25:39,468 --> 00:25:41,787 - Well, did you take some photos? - Did I get any photos?! 565 00:25:41,788 --> 00:25:45,467 Of the toilet sex?! No, Audrey, I didn't. Sorry about that. 566 00:25:45,468 --> 00:25:46,707 No, not of the sex. 567 00:25:46,708 --> 00:25:48,467 I probably could ask them some questions though. 568 00:25:48,468 --> 00:25:49,787 It is pumping in there. 569 00:25:49,788 --> 00:25:51,507 Oh, could you? That would be great. 570 00:25:51,508 --> 00:25:52,987 Hey, do you want to see my daughter walk? 571 00:25:52,988 --> 00:25:55,107 - Oh, no, I couldn't be fucked. Bye. - Oh, come on, she... 572 00:25:55,108 --> 00:25:56,668 (DISCONNECTS) 573 00:26:14,508 --> 00:26:17,187 (MESSAGE SENT ALERT CHIMES) 574 00:26:17,188 --> 00:26:19,068 (MESSAGE RECEIVED ALERT CHIMES) 575 00:26:26,148 --> 00:26:28,268 (GROANS) 576 00:26:37,028 --> 00:26:39,548 - (SHUTTER CLICKS) - Oh! 577 00:26:40,708 --> 00:26:43,068 - Oh. - (MESSAGE SENT ALERT CHIMES) 578 00:26:49,148 --> 00:26:52,228 (PHONE VIBRATES) 579 00:26:55,668 --> 00:26:56,982 Hi. 580 00:26:56,983 --> 00:26:59,107 Yeah, I think I just need one of your boobs. 581 00:26:59,108 --> 00:27:00,883 That's kind of the point. 582 00:27:00,884 --> 00:27:04,507 Seriously? Oh, that's so cliched. We're better than that, aren't we? 583 00:27:04,508 --> 00:27:06,267 Not some kind of art project or something, 584 00:27:06,268 --> 00:27:10,507 it's simple, basic desire, you know? 585 00:27:10,508 --> 00:27:13,267 I mean, I sent you my bits, and that was embarrassing at first. 586 00:27:13,268 --> 00:27:16,307 And I don't think we need to talk about it. 587 00:27:16,308 --> 00:27:19,627 I prefer the talking. And your bits in context. 588 00:27:19,628 --> 00:27:22,035 Well, what DO you find attractive? 589 00:27:23,508 --> 00:27:27,107 - Your dry sense of humour. - I can't photograph that. 590 00:27:27,108 --> 00:27:29,347 OK, well, I like watching you do things you're really good at. 591 00:27:29,348 --> 00:27:31,107 You know, like, um... 592 00:27:31,108 --> 00:27:34,747 Like board games and deboning fish. 593 00:27:34,748 --> 00:27:37,467 Oh, yeah? You know, there's an old Connect Four here? 594 00:27:37,468 --> 00:27:40,787 I could nude up and, you know, 595 00:27:40,788 --> 00:27:43,107 put an extra playing piece in amongst... 596 00:27:43,108 --> 00:27:44,867 No! 597 00:27:44,868 --> 00:27:46,907 And I like you sitting opposite me, fully dressed, 598 00:27:46,908 --> 00:27:49,027 when I've picked your outfit. 599 00:27:49,028 --> 00:27:51,587 - I miss our dates. - Yeah, me too. 600 00:27:51,588 --> 00:27:53,253 I miss my girls. 601 00:27:54,388 --> 00:27:57,987 - And that's not a euphemism. - I know what you did there. 602 00:27:57,988 --> 00:28:01,987 Yeah, to me. I mean Andre Rieu is the extent of my knowledge. 603 00:28:01,988 --> 00:28:03,667 My mum loves him. 604 00:28:03,668 --> 00:28:06,227 Well, no-one I play with has hair like his. 605 00:28:06,228 --> 00:28:09,267 (BOTH LAUGH) 606 00:28:09,268 --> 00:28:11,947 I want to be honest with you. 607 00:28:11,948 --> 00:28:13,467 I'm married. 608 00:28:13,468 --> 00:28:15,849 My husband really likes to watch. 609 00:28:19,028 --> 00:28:20,787 Just the bill? 610 00:28:20,788 --> 00:28:24,016 So, you're in? I'll text Ben. 611 00:28:24,017 --> 00:28:26,458 No! Not in. Don't text Ben. 612 00:28:28,588 --> 00:28:31,987 I have a one-year-old boy and an overinvolved donor dad. 613 00:28:31,988 --> 00:28:33,027 Right. (LAUGHS) 614 00:28:33,028 --> 00:28:36,264 I play cello. I teach more than play these days. 615 00:28:37,268 --> 00:28:40,223 I just came out to my family, at age 39... 616 00:28:42,188 --> 00:28:43,867 ...who are now in denial. 617 00:28:43,868 --> 00:28:46,107 (LAUGHS) OK. 618 00:28:46,108 --> 00:28:48,787 Um, I'm only three years out myself. 619 00:28:48,788 --> 00:28:50,267 Huh. 620 00:28:50,268 --> 00:28:52,947 My family is pretty progressive. 621 00:28:52,948 --> 00:28:55,827 Well, except my aunty, but fuck her. 622 00:28:55,828 --> 00:28:58,827 She still gives her 35-year-old daughter pocket money, so... 623 00:28:58,828 --> 00:29:01,187 (LAUGHS) 624 00:29:01,188 --> 00:29:05,947 I've never dated an Indian woman before. Mum will be happy. Racist. 625 00:29:05,948 --> 00:29:06,948 Mm. 626 00:29:06,949 --> 00:29:09,427 I'm 35, I'm back at uni 627 00:29:09,428 --> 00:29:12,587 and I work part-time here, which you know. 628 00:29:12,588 --> 00:29:14,907 I do. But what are you studying? 629 00:29:14,908 --> 00:29:18,021 - Medicine. - Oh. 630 00:29:21,388 --> 00:29:23,227 - JEREMY: Thanks, mate. - MAN: Thanks, mate. 631 00:29:23,228 --> 00:29:24,988 (DOOR CLOSES, PHONE RINGS) 632 00:29:27,908 --> 00:29:30,067 - Did you buy me dinner? - AUDREY: Mm-hm. 633 00:29:30,068 --> 00:29:31,827 Green curry? It's perfect. 634 00:29:31,828 --> 00:29:33,587 OK, now open your laptop. 635 00:29:33,588 --> 00:29:35,747 We're going to watch Michelle Wolf's latest special. 636 00:29:35,748 --> 00:29:37,587 Dinner and a show? 637 00:29:37,588 --> 00:29:39,027 Old school. 638 00:29:39,028 --> 00:29:42,467 And this way you can heckle without risking ridicule, or expulsion. 639 00:29:42,468 --> 00:29:44,067 - Or embarrassing me. - Nice one. 640 00:29:44,068 --> 00:29:45,627 Give me five, I'll set it up. 641 00:29:45,628 --> 00:29:48,827 (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE ON LAPTOP) 642 00:29:48,828 --> 00:29:50,587 Another glass? 643 00:29:50,588 --> 00:29:52,667 Hm, don't mind if I do. 644 00:29:52,668 --> 00:29:55,067 Please, allow me. OK, you do it. 645 00:29:55,068 --> 00:29:57,308 (LAUGHS) 646 00:29:58,988 --> 00:30:01,347 Oh, I forgot to tell you, Martha called. 647 00:30:01,348 --> 00:30:02,467 Apparently, Teddy has had 648 00:30:02,468 --> 00:30:04,307 an extremely mild case of hand, foot and mouth. 649 00:30:04,308 --> 00:30:05,867 It's gone through his whole childcare. 650 00:30:05,868 --> 00:30:08,427 She didn't even realise. So, it wasn't Yiayia's after all. 651 00:30:08,428 --> 00:30:10,553 - That's a relief. - Mm. 652 00:30:11,748 --> 00:30:14,267 - I bloody love that place. - Yiayia's the best. 653 00:30:14,268 --> 00:30:17,779 Yeah, she really is. I wish she was my yiayia. 654 00:30:17,780 --> 00:30:19,940 I miss you. 655 00:30:19,941 --> 00:30:21,547 You wearing pants? 656 00:30:21,548 --> 00:30:23,024 Let's find out. 657 00:30:24,228 --> 00:30:27,027 (LAUGHS) 658 00:30:27,028 --> 00:30:28,947 No. No, you're not. 659 00:30:28,948 --> 00:30:31,458 - Are you going to take yours off? - What?! 660 00:30:31,459 --> 00:30:34,027 - No! - One night only. Come on! 661 00:30:34,028 --> 00:30:37,027 Oh, I'm wearing bad undies. 662 00:30:37,028 --> 00:30:39,587 There's no such thing as bad undies. Not when you're in Adelaide. 663 00:30:39,588 --> 00:30:41,427 (LAUGHS) 664 00:30:41,428 --> 00:30:43,147 Alright, alright. 665 00:30:43,148 --> 00:30:44,724 Here we go. 666 00:30:45,588 --> 00:30:47,907 Darling, I just popped in to get... 667 00:30:47,908 --> 00:30:50,747 Oh, nothing. Gone. 668 00:30:50,748 --> 00:30:53,834 - Jeremy, hi. - Oh, hi, Verity. 669 00:30:54,708 --> 00:30:57,467 ♪ Do you have a secret place ♪ 670 00:30:57,468 --> 00:31:00,987 ♪ Where you can go and meet some boys? ♪ 671 00:31:00,988 --> 00:31:02,907 ♪ Little people, tall... ♪ 672 00:31:02,908 --> 00:31:04,387 I'm not doing that again. 673 00:31:04,388 --> 00:31:07,982 ♪ Little people, tall and smiley. ♪ 674 00:31:10,428 --> 00:31:14,707 ♪ Up to my knees in a sea of voices ♪ 675 00:31:14,708 --> 00:31:18,467 ♪ Caught in a net with a thousand choices ♪ 676 00:31:18,468 --> 00:31:22,147 ♪ I try to forget all the rules in the night ♪ 677 00:31:22,148 --> 00:31:27,107 ♪ But the bells in my head, they put up such a fight ♪ 678 00:31:27,108 --> 00:31:30,547 ♪ Anything can happen when you're just like me ♪ 679 00:31:30,548 --> 00:31:34,107 ♪ I'm running carelessly through a maze ♪ 680 00:31:34,108 --> 00:31:36,907 ♪ How unexpected ♪ 681 00:31:36,908 --> 00:31:39,347 ♪ I'm under lock and key ♪ 682 00:31:39,348 --> 00:31:43,827 ♪ In a world of relentless passion ♪ 683 00:31:43,828 --> 00:31:47,467 ♪ Anything can happen when you're just like me ♪ 684 00:31:47,468 --> 00:31:50,827 ♪ I'm running carelessly through a maze ♪ 685 00:31:50,828 --> 00:31:53,628 ♪ How unexpected. ♪ 51673

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