Original subtitles

-(heavy breathing) -(suspenseful music playing)

(snoring)

No, no, no. Please, please.

No more pictures, everybody.

All right. Fine, fine. Get my good side.

(music intensifies)

(screams)

Yes, I'll design a line for you, Michael B. Jordan.

(screaming)

(stuttering): Mom, Mom, Mom!

It's a-- It's a ch-chupacabra in there!

(all screaming)

Get behind me, babies!

-Raven: Okay. -(screaming)

(all whimpering)

Choke on some Tropical Glaze, you creep!

-(coughing) -All: Levi?

Levi, what are you wearing and why are you interrupting

my nightly date with Michael B. Jordan?

Sorry. I've been having trouble sleeping lately.

This stuff helps.

That stuff makes you look cray-cray in the day-day.

Poor Levi.

He's been clinging on to things his mom sent him from the cruise.

Now he just smells like cheap air freshener.

Levi...

I think I know what's going on.

You miss your mama.

What? I don't miss my mom at all.

Then why do you have a shirt with her face on it?

This is a plain T-shirt.

If you see my mom, that means you miss her.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I'm gonna put on my matching pants.

Oh!

- Hey - Yo

Let me tell you somethin'

Had my vision all worked out

But then life had other plans

Tell 'em, Rae

It's crazy when things turn upside down

But ya gotta get up and take that chance

- Maybe I'm just finding my way - Learning how to fly

- Yeah, we're gonna be okay - Ya know I got you, right?

It might be wild, but ya know that we make it work

We're just kids caught up in a crazy world

- Come on! - It's Raven's Home

- We get loud! - It's Raven's Home

It's our crowd!

Might be tough, but together we make it look good

Down for each other like family should

It's Raven's Home

When it's tough

It's Raven's Home

We got love

'Cause no matter the weather, ya know we gon' shine

There for each other, ya know it's our time

(Raven laughs)

Yep! That's us.

(Chelsea laughing)

You save me some sunscreen, Nikos.

Hey, Rae.

Uh-uh, girl. Don't you "Hey, Raven" me.

We need to talk about your son.

Who? Levi?

Do you have another son

that another best friend is raising?

Listen, Levi... he's lost without you.

-Chelsea:What do you mean? -Here's what I mean.

All right, Mom. I need you to sign my permission slip.

Here you go.

Just sign right here.

Thank you.

It's okay, Rae. I've encouraged Levi to talk to plants.

It helps them grow.

And besides, he's with you.

I know you wouldn't let anything happen to my baby.

Chels, you know I have your back, but I think I've done all I can do.

I mean, I've wiped, I've wiped noses, I've wiped...

so many things.

When you coming back?

We need you and we miss you.

I miss you too.

But, you know, these seminars, they're a hit.

It's-- It's just-- it's really hard for me to leave right now.

Chels. Oh, no. I see those eyes, Chels.

I see them. They shifty. What you not telling me?

(scoffs) Well, I--

I can't disappoint my Schmoppies.

Schmoppies? What is that, a mop cult?

What about me?

Well, there's only one of you.

You know? There's trillions of them.

In fact, there's a seminar starting right now.

Gotta go, love you! Bye!

Man, that was close.

I almost spilled the beans.

I knew it! I knew it!

I knew the shifty eyes.

What beans aren't you telling me?

Booker: Mom, you better come here!

It sounds like you have an emergency, Rae.

You better go! Love you, bye!

Okay, here's the first one.

This is when my mom took me to the zoo.

Levi, it's just a black screen.

Yeah, she left the lens cap on.

Mom.

(whispering): Just roll with it.

-What's going on? -Nia: Hey.

Mom, Levi...

is giving us a slide show of family photos with Aunt Chelsea.

Oh, snap. I'm starting to see it.

Levi, admit it. You miss your mom.

Miss my mom?

Don't make me laugh. (forced laughter)

Mom. Mom, I'm scared.

Okay, okay. Listen, listen.

Let me just talk to Levi really fast, okay?

Um, Levi...

I'm gonna go take you to see you mom.

Yes! Finally!

I've been acting out for weeks.

I've already got my suitcase packed.

-I even packed for Booker. -But what'd you pack?

Whatever was clean.

So I packed very light.

Levi...

If you wanted to see your mom, all you had to do was ask.

Auntie Rae,

will you please take me to see my mom?

Yes.

Yes!

Okay, then I'll ask.

-Can I come? -No.

But you will get a souvenir.

because you're gonna do the most important job.

You're gonna water my plants.

(grunting)

-Nah! Uh! -Booker, if your foot touches me

-one more time-- -Tess (on phone): Back off, homie!

You're crowing us.

You're not even in the car!

(crunching)

Gary, this is what happens when you take a shared Scut

from Chicago to Indiana.

(giggles) This is what happens.

Levi, why is your elbow all the way over here?

I spread when I sit.

Well, spread to Nia's side of the car.

Wow, you think you're space is more important than mine,

just like you think your New York itinerary is more important than mine.

Uh, it is. First, we're going to Yankee Stadium.

Then we're going to get a slice of pizza,

and then we're going to wait outside Rihanna's brownstone.

Simple!

No. First, we're going to Broadway,

and then we're gonna see the Statue of Liberty,

and then, we're going to go wait outside Michael B. Jordan's apartment.

Really? (squealing)

I track his location.

Hey, hey, hey.

First, we're going to the boat

to drop me off so I can spend the week with my mom.

Well, look at that.

The little one is the most responsible in the back seat.

Well, what you guys ought to do--

No, Tess. No, Tess. What you ought to do

is go water the plants 'cause we about to go see Michael B. Jordan.

-Okay? -(Nia giggling)

Bye!

All right, Gary.

(clears throat) Welcome to Gary... Indiana.

-Thank you riding with-- Can you take me with you? -Gary: No.

-Bye, Gary. -Booker: Great, he's gone.

Can I sit in the front seat now?

Nope. If anyone gets to sit in the front seat, it should be me.

-I'm the oldest. -(mocking laughter)

-By two minutes! -Listen, listen, listen.

-Do y'all want souvenirs? -All: Yes.

Okay, well, then leaving an open seat for the Scut passenger

is how we get our souvenirs money, okay?

Well, how about you guys leave some room for me?

Booker: Aah! Levi, move over!

Booker, I warned you. One more time and that foot is mine.

-Oh this foot? -Yes, this one!

What Mom Commandments are you breaking right now?

Thou shalt not use an outside voice inside of the car.

Thou shalt not kick the back of thy mother's seat.

But to be fair,

I wouldn't have to kick the back of your seat

-if I could get some room back here. -(tires screech)

-(kids arguing) -Don't make me pull this car over!

(whimpering): Don't make me do it.

Welcome! Whoo! Oh!

Thank you all so much for being here.

I'm Chelsea Grayson, and I am the inventor of the Schmop.

And I'm here to help all of you find your inspiration

and become the inventor you've always wanted to be.

(giggles) Okay.

Are there any questions before we get started?

First you have to make a mess.

-Okay? -Excuse me.

Oh, Miss Bertha, back again.

Have you thought of shuffleboard?

Or the, um, "How To Get Your Groove Back" seminar, huh?

I think it starts in like 10 minutes.

(clears throats) Okay. What's your question?

Well, it says here on this flyer that I get a free Schmop.

Miss Bertha, hey. That wasn't a question.

(giggling)

It says here on this flyer that I get a free Schmop,

doesn't it?

Okay, there we go. All right.

-(clears throat) -Can I have hers?

What? But you already have three.

Well, can I have another one? Ain't nobody else here.

Raven/Booker/Levi: We're gettin' cray-cray

- Booker: What? - In the day-day

- Uh - And we can't stop-stop

- So we drop-drop - Woo!

Going side by side

Our hearts open wide-wide

Everything's bizarre

Watch out for that cat, rawr-rawr!

Ah! 'kay-'kay

Man, I'm having so much fun,

I don't even want to know if we're there yet!

Man, are we there yet?

No, sweetheart. We're not there.

-But we are in Maumee. -Mommy?

-Yeah. Maumee, Ohio. -(tire pops)

-Oh no! What's happening? -(tire warbling)

I think we have a flat.

Well, there's nothing flat about this situation!

Are we there yet?

Booker (sighs): No.

But we got a flat, but it's no big deal,

right... Maumee?

(laughing)

Y'all got jokes.

Let's see if y'all still laughing

when I cancel Christmas.

Ha-ha! Joke's on her.

We not gon' be laughing.

(guffaws)

All right, y'all, listen.

(grunts)

Bad news is, is that we have a flat.

The good news is, is I have a spare.

So we change your tire and get going?

No, no. You didn't let me finish.

The worst news is, I used the spare last week so we're gonna need a tow.

(whooshing)

Oh, Rae! Help me!

(whooshing)

(gasps)

I need a tow and I need a miracle.

Operator (over phone): Your call is very important to us

and will be answered in the next 62 minutes.

Please stay on the line.

Where else would I go?

Auntie Rae, we've been waiting for two hours.

Are you gonna make it to my mom in time?

Calm down, sweetheart, of course we are.

We're just gonna get the tire fixed,

we're gonna get back on the road,

-we're gonna save your mom. -Save my mom?

Did I say save?

I didn't mean-- I meant to say we're gonna see your mom.

I switched up words for a reason.

Did I say "for a reason"?

I meant for no rea-- (laughs nervously)

We're not gonna make it.

(panting): Is it just me

or is this car getting smaller

-and smaller? -Hold up, hold up, now, Levi.

Levi, stay with me, okay?

Look at all the extra room you have.

-Look at all that. -Yeah, with all that breathing room,

you should relax and take your mind off of it.

Fine. I'll just look out the window.

It will soothe me.

Uh, I can't see. I need a window seat.

Booker, switch seats with him.

-Mom-- -Now, boy!

(grunts)

Okay.

Corn.

-Cow. -(cow mooing)

Tess. Tow truck.

Hold up. Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. Did you say Tess?

-Yeah, hold up. Did you say tow truck? -(honking)

How's it going family?

Who wants a tuna sandwich?

-Oh! -Oh!

Hey, Chelsea! What's Schmopping?

(both laughing)

Thanks for clearing out so I can do my Lip Kitty presentation.

Lip Kitties! (kisses) Meow, meow!

Okay, Tabby, Calico, lip gloss over here.

Whiskers, Socks, swag bags over there.

You know, considering cats don't have lips,

the concept of Lip Kitties is so inspired.

Can you believe my dad didn't want to hire them?

It's like, you only lent me a measly one million dollars

to start this company.

(scoffs) A little help here, Dad!

Wow. I started the Schmop with 5.99

and a magic eight ball. You know, like,

"Will the Schmop work?" Whaaa!

Ah! "Odds are in your favor!"

It's just so hard running your own company.

Hey, catnip eyeliner next to the kitty glitter.

I have to do everything. Rawr!

Yeah, I mean, run your own business and this Inventors' Cruise.

I mean, it's... it's almost like you have nine lives.

(both laughing)

You know what else is like, so weird?

-What? -Like how you were my idol,

and now I'm your boss.

And I'm like, way younger than you are.

So, Chelsea, how many Schmops have you sold?

Oh, I'm not doing too great today, actually.

You've been here six months.

You need to pick it up with her seminar and your sales.

Yeah. Actually, um, you know one customer couldn't get enough.

She was, you know, picking them up faster than I could put them down.

Miss Bertha does not count.

Chelsea Grayson, you have done this before.

You need to figure out what success means to you now,

and then don't let anything get in your way.

Yeah.

Actually, my... my son Levi getting in the way

was my inspiration for the Schmop.

(chuckles) Gosh, he was such a messy kid.

Actually, this one time he spilled apple sauce all over the floor--

Aw. I don't relate to that.

Chelsea, listen to me.

In order to sell the Schmop,

you need to love the Schmop.

-Yeah. -Do you love the Schmop?

Yes! Of course I do.

Great. Then don't let anything get in between you and what you love.

(kisses) Ciao meow.

(kisses) Mow-chow.

-Thanks, Uncle Jimmy! -(honking)

Okay, let's go.

Hey, wait, I thought your dad's name was Jimmy.

Yeah, Chicago Jimmy.

That was Ohio Jimmy.

And he didn't mind helping out

since he's on his way to visit Staten Island Jimmy.

Well, it was nice of your uncle to help out.

But I don't think we're gonna make it in time.

Oh, Levi, stop worrying.

Tess, thanks for coming.

Nia, thanks for texting Tess to come.

And, Booker, stop hoarding the tuna sandwiches.

Oh no, I, uh, I already ate all them.

Oh, then you're sweating it out, boo.

-Put your shoes back on. -Nia: Ew!

It's so gross.

All right, everybody, buckle up!

Seat belts.

All righty, let's get going.

-Great. -(giggles)

Wait, how come Tess gets to sit in the front?

(sighs) Thou shalt not ask Mama no more questions

-this trip. -That's not fair!

(kids arguing)

- So quiet and I wanna know - Why, ooh

- Ooh! Yeah! - Love is like a jumbo jet

- Why don't we just fly it? - Fly, fly, fly, fly

- Don't want to see you fret - Yeah

- So shy, shy, shy - So shy, shy, shy

(phone ringing)

(vocalizing)

-Hey, Chels. What's up? -Hey!

Hey, where's Levi?

He is strapped to the roof of the car.

(laughs) That was only funny once, Rae.

(laughing) I'm still laughing, Chels.

Still laughing.

Uh, no. They're asleep. Everybody's asleep. What's going on?

I...

I want to come home.

But we're bring Levi to you.

No. No, Rae.

This is over.

It's time for me to come home.

Oh, okay. Well...

You know what that means.

We're really gonna have to strap Levi to the top of the car.

Come on, Rae! I'm serious.

Is that you mom?

(gasps) Hi! Levi! Is that my baby boy?

I can't wait to see you!

Chelsea:Oh, honey. Oh, I can't wait to...

(static crackles): ee-aah-oh-aah ...you either.

Pedal to the metal, Auntie Rae!

I need to "ee-aah-oh-aah" my mom!

Oh, okay. All right.

Guys, this is it!

The Inspired Inventors' Cruise!

We made it just in time.

Whoa!

Look at how big that boat is.

Chill, Booker, you acting brand-new.

Oh, so. You've been on a cruise before?

We're talking about you.

Guys, where's my mom?

I wanna be the first one to see her. Where is she?

Oh! There she is.

Mom! Mom! Here I am!

Levi! Levi!

Kids, go get him. Those chicken legs run fast. Go ahead.

Excuse me, um, have you seen my best friend?

She's about yea tall, super bossy--

Lady, I don't know where--

(both screaming)

-Oh, I missed you so much. -I know!

Chels, listen. I think I had a vision of you falling off the boat.

(gasps) You know what?

I did trip on the way over here to meet you, but I'm fine.

-Okay. -(giggling)

-Where's Levi? -Oh, he got so excited, he ran up the ramp.

The kids are getting him. Then, before we head home, we're gonna see the sights.

We're gonna see the Statue of Liberty, we're gonna see Times Square,

and try some of that so-called "pizza" they got here.

Oh, it's been so long since I've seen Levi.

I can't wait to hug him and kiss him and squeeze him.

I missed him so much. (giggles)

-I... I missed the twins too. -Oh, yeah.

And that girl across the hall.

-You know what else you missed? -What?

Mr. Protein Shake across the street just bought a brand--

(horn blaring)

-What about the-- -(horn blaring)

-And when he made-- -(horn blaring)

Chelsea, watch your mouth!

-No! That's three horns, Rae. -Huh?

Which means the ship's leaving.

Both: Oh! What are we gonna do?

-(ships horn blares) -Mom! Mom!

Whoa. Not Mom. Not Mom.

Guys, where's my mom? I don't see her.

There she is! Mom!

Aunt Chelsea! Hi!

Hey, why is the dock moving away from the ship?

It's not the dock that's moving, it's us!

Somebody stop that boat! Somebody stop that boat!

I need to see my baby!

Calm down Chels. Calm down. It'll be okay.

-No! -Okay, wait.

(phone rings)

-Mom? -Raven (over phone):Kids!

Don't worry. Everything's gonna be okay.

-We'll find a way to get to you somehow. -Yeah.

Okay, Mom.

Hey, Levi. Are you okay?

I-I can't see her. I can't see her!

Chelsea (over phone): It's okay, honey. Mommy's right here!

I can hear her.

(gasps) I can hear her!

But I need to see her!

Mom! Can you see me?

I'm gonna be honest, Levi, honey!

No, not really!

Chels, what are we gonna do?

Can't they stop the boat? Our kids are on that boat.

No. Once the boat leaves port, it never backs up.

They tried it once with theTitanic,

you know, and we all know how that turned out.

Okay, Mom. We will just go to Aunt Chelsea's cabin

and wait for you to tell us what to do next.

Okay, Chels. What do they do next?

Listen, kids. I'm in cabin 4002.

Just stay there and wait for Raven and I

to drive up and meet you at the next port.

Oh, what's that? Like Staten Island?

It's not a ferry, Raven. It's a cruise ship.

The next stop is Miami.

All: Miami?

Chels, how long is it gonna take us to get to Miami?

Uh, by car about 20 hours.

By cruise ship?

-Five days. -Kids and Raven: Five days!

-Oh, no. -Jeez!

What are we gonna do? We don't have any money.

And any deodorant.

No underwear.

-Oh. -I know.

Chelsea: Listen, kids. You'll be fine.

There's 24-hour buffets.

There's a tween disco, you know?

There's games, prizes,

contests, you know. It's-- it's...

Well, it's a paradise.

Chels, it's a paradise for paying customers.

-That's right. -We brought Levi to see you.

He's the only one with a ticket.

-I know. -My babies are stowaways.

Listen, kids, just stick with Levi.

His wristband will help you get anything you need, okay?

Mom, I miss you.

Oh, Levi.

Levi, I--

Well, I guess we're just gonna have to be by ourselves

for the next five days.

I am so freaking out right now.

I know, Booker. Look, we're gonna be okay.

I just-- I just don't know what to do.

I mean, dance, eat, swim, win a prize.

I mean, there are just so many choice in paradise.

(giggling) Hey!

-Maybe I should get a pair of maracas. -Yeah!

Five days?

Our kids can't be alone on a boat for five days.

-I know. -I barely trust them to be alone

for five minutes.

What are we gonna do, Rae? I mean,

how are we even gonna catch up to them?

I don't know. I don't know.

(mouths)

Hold on tight, Chels!

Can you do this, Raven?

Of course I can! It's for the kids.

Now stop talking and hold down my wig!

(both screaming)

Yep

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