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1
00:00:01,621 --> 00:00:06,476
(BABY CHIP CRYING)
2
00:00:13,657 --> 00:00:15,203
- Morning.
- Morning, Big Chip.
3
00:00:15,726 --> 00:00:16,742
Hey, Chip? No, no, no, no...
4
00:00:16,767 --> 00:00:17,904
Can I please take a shower?
5
00:00:17,929 --> 00:00:19,225
If I don't take a shower, I'm gonna die.
6
00:00:19,250 --> 00:00:20,265
- Will you hold Little Chip?
- I was...
7
00:00:20,290 --> 00:00:21,290
I need to go to the rodeo.
8
00:00:21,315 --> 00:00:22,649
JODE: Honey, you need
to change his diaper.
9
00:00:22,674 --> 00:00:24,258
I was up five times last night, Jode.
10
00:00:24,283 --> 00:00:26,764
- You do it. It's just piss.
- I have to get to Arby's,
11
00:00:26,789 --> 00:00:28,355
The cloth diapers take
forever to change.
12
00:00:28,380 --> 00:00:30,710
They're slow to change,
fast to biodegrade, Jode.
13
00:00:30,735 --> 00:00:31,907
Is that a good thing?
14
00:00:31,932 --> 00:00:33,930
JODE: Baby's crying keep
you up last night, Chip?
15
00:00:34,725 --> 00:00:35,821
Uh...
16
00:00:35,846 --> 00:00:37,045
- No, I didn't...
- We're trying to let him cry it out,
17
00:00:37,070 --> 00:00:39,819
- you know? It's like a method.
- Yeah. It's, um...
18
00:00:40,789 --> 00:00:42,662
It's noisy, yeah, but, uh...
19
00:00:42,687 --> 00:00:44,264
- Yeah.
- ... it's cute.
20
00:00:44,693 --> 00:00:46,428
Yeah, man, ain't he cute?
21
00:00:46,774 --> 00:00:48,647
Can you believe we made
that little Chip baby?
22
00:00:49,248 --> 00:00:50,467
Yeah, God, yeah.
23
00:00:50,492 --> 00:00:52,115
Greatest thing that's
ever happened to me, man.
24
00:00:53,172 --> 00:00:54,913
- Rent's due.
- Huh?
25
00:00:55,269 --> 00:00:56,311
Rent is due.
26
00:00:57,147 --> 00:00:58,373
Yeah, um...
27
00:00:58,616 --> 00:01:00,115
Actually, my wallet's right here.
28
00:01:01,069 --> 00:01:02,381
It's okay, baby.
29
00:01:02,406 --> 00:01:03,904
(SHUSHING) It's okay.
30
00:01:03,929 --> 00:01:05,342
Yeah, that should work.
31
00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:08,529
Oh, man, I'm gonna
take Claire to dinner.
32
00:01:09,025 --> 00:01:10,201
Can you babysit?
33
00:01:10,628 --> 00:01:12,701
- When?
- Hey, we're going to dinner tonight!
34
00:01:12,726 --> 00:01:13,834
- Tonight?
- Is that cool, man?
35
00:01:13,859 --> 00:01:15,045
You need to bond with the baby.
36
00:01:15,070 --> 00:01:16,897
Oh. (SHUSHING)
37
00:01:16,922 --> 00:01:19,686
- Yeah, I guess so. I...
- Oh, man, thank you so much.
38
00:01:19,711 --> 00:01:22,053
That's... That's awesome, man.
39
00:01:22,897 --> 00:01:25,900
Hey, it's all right.
Hey, it's Uncle Chip.
40
00:01:25,925 --> 00:01:27,295
All right, see you. Thanks, buddy.
41
00:01:28,152 --> 00:01:29,897
- (FARTS)
- TRINITY: Oh, Chip, hey.
42
00:01:29,922 --> 00:01:31,037
- Yeah.
- He's pooping.
43
00:01:31,062 --> 00:01:33,381
Can you just take the diaper
and scrape all the shit out of it
44
00:01:33,406 --> 00:01:35,069
and put it in the dirty diaper bucket?
45
00:01:35,094 --> 00:01:37,100
Thank you so much,
I'll be out in an hour.
46
00:01:42,746 --> 00:01:47,442
(BOTH CRYING)
47
00:01:49,092 --> 00:01:50,498
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
48
00:01:50,915 --> 00:01:52,326
CHIP (SIGHING): Aw, I shouldn't do this,
49
00:01:52,351 --> 00:01:54,022
but I'm just gonna get
some disposable diapers
50
00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:55,053
for Baby Chip.
51
00:01:55,535 --> 00:01:57,115
Um, I think they're over here.
52
00:01:57,140 --> 00:01:58,944
- Okay, okay.
- Baby Chip, huh?
53
00:01:58,969 --> 00:02:01,717
I wish somebody would
name a baby after me.
54
00:02:02,209 --> 00:02:04,061
Well, it's not that easy, Martha.
55
00:02:04,086 --> 00:02:06,088
Baby Chip cries a lot.
56
00:02:06,201 --> 00:02:08,748
- Most babies do, I've heard.
- (WHISPERING): Hey.
57
00:02:09,709 --> 00:02:11,897
How do you know when
a baby is possessed?
58
00:02:13,378 --> 00:02:16,551
I think it's like if he
has a really deep voice
59
00:02:16,576 --> 00:02:19,092
- or projectile-vomits.
- Yeah?
60
00:02:19,117 --> 00:02:21,373
Or his head spins all the way around.
61
00:02:21,723 --> 00:02:24,029
But that last one might be fake.
62
00:02:24,664 --> 00:02:25,928
(REGULAR VOLUME):
Thank you for the information.
63
00:02:25,953 --> 00:02:28,178
- Thank you so much.
- Chip, it sounds like
64
00:02:28,203 --> 00:02:31,076
your living situation
is pretty untenable.
65
00:02:31,101 --> 00:02:33,897
I'm gonna find
an apartment for you, okay?
66
00:02:33,922 --> 00:02:36,545
It took me 73 tries to find mine.
67
00:02:36,570 --> 00:02:37,912
It can be really daunting.
68
00:02:37,937 --> 00:02:39,084
Martha, look,
69
00:02:39,250 --> 00:02:41,974
I live with Baby Chip now,
Jode and Trinity.
70
00:02:42,380 --> 00:02:44,114
That's just who I live with...
They're my family.
71
00:02:44,139 --> 00:02:45,488
I need stool softeners.
72
00:02:45,513 --> 00:02:47,185
(SIGHS) Okay. Then, Chip,
73
00:02:47,210 --> 00:02:49,709
do you want to know what my
new life coach would say?
74
00:02:49,841 --> 00:02:51,013
You have a life coach?
75
00:02:51,123 --> 00:02:53,299
- Yeah.
- But don't you need a life first?
76
00:02:53,324 --> 00:02:55,427
- (SIGHS)
- Hey, those are free samples.
77
00:02:55,452 --> 00:02:56,452
Look at that.
78
00:02:57,162 --> 00:02:59,193
Is this, uh, chili safe for babies?
79
00:03:00,911 --> 00:03:03,094
I need somebody to check
all the light bulbs.
80
00:03:03,119 --> 00:03:05,477
In the bathrooms, in the waiting rooms,
81
00:03:05,502 --> 00:03:07,809
throughout the whole rodeo,
please, if somebody can do that.
82
00:03:08,141 --> 00:03:09,367
And then, if you could order
83
00:03:09,392 --> 00:03:10,953
urinal cakes, that would be helpful.
84
00:03:10,978 --> 00:03:12,734
Amazon is out of urinal cakes.
85
00:03:12,759 --> 00:03:14,256
How is Amazon out of urinal cakes?
86
00:03:14,281 --> 00:03:15,648
Double-check, please. Okay?
87
00:03:15,673 --> 00:03:19,719
That's a hell of a name to
calls omething like that, a cake.
88
00:03:19,744 --> 00:03:22,141
CHIP: And then, the-the bleachers,
especially the northwest corner
89
00:03:22,166 --> 00:03:23,844
- of the, uh...
- DANIEL: Sorry, excuse me.
90
00:03:23,869 --> 00:03:26,268
Hate to interrupt. Oh, hey,
Eddie, how are you doing?
91
00:03:26,293 --> 00:03:28,900
- Oh. Sober. (CHUCKLES)
- Hi.
92
00:03:28,925 --> 00:03:30,064
- Sober?
- Yeah.
93
00:03:30,089 --> 00:03:32,439
Oh, good to... good. Good. Hi-hi. Hi.
94
00:03:32,464 --> 00:03:33,478
Hey.
95
00:03:33,503 --> 00:03:36,290
Uh, Daniel Kwon, um... I'm your, uh,
96
00:03:36,315 --> 00:03:38,547
from the church next door,
I'm a friend of your mother's.
97
00:03:38,572 --> 00:03:40,384
(YAWNING): My mother's
told me about you, yeah.
98
00:03:40,486 --> 00:03:41,822
I know who you are... sorry.
99
00:03:42,309 --> 00:03:44,136
Yeah... I... Excuse me.
100
00:03:44,426 --> 00:03:46,189
DANIEL: So, listen, can you,
can you do me a favor?
101
00:03:46,214 --> 00:03:47,728
Could you ask your mother if we can rent
102
00:03:47,753 --> 00:03:49,478
your parking lot during
our church service?
103
00:03:49,503 --> 00:03:50,892
Our attendance is
going through the roof.
104
00:03:50,917 --> 00:03:52,970
Absolutely, we can, uh... You know what?
105
00:03:54,611 --> 00:03:55,806
We don't need to call her.
106
00:03:57,019 --> 00:03:58,400
What kind of money are we talking about?
107
00:03:58,639 --> 00:04:00,165
Uh, we got about $300?
108
00:04:00,190 --> 00:04:03,587
- Can you do it for $400?
- Uh... $325?
109
00:04:03,612 --> 00:04:06,390
- How about $320?
- Perfect. Okay, great.
110
00:04:06,415 --> 00:04:07,845
Thanks. Great to meet
you guys. Thank you.
111
00:04:07,870 --> 00:04:09,517
All right, thank you.
I'll talk to you later.
112
00:04:10,215 --> 00:04:11,215
Wait a second.
113
00:04:15,673 --> 00:04:18,173
AUTOMATED VOICE:
You have one new message.
114
00:04:18,198 --> 00:04:19,954
MRS. BASKETS:
Hey, Chip, it's your mother.
115
00:04:19,979 --> 00:04:22,954
- I'm here with Ken and Susan.
- (SUSAN MEOWING)
116
00:04:22,979 --> 00:04:25,939
Susan says hi. (LAUGHS)
117
00:04:26,031 --> 00:04:28,268
Daniel says he met with you,
118
00:04:28,293 --> 00:04:30,627
and you're quite the little negotiator.
119
00:04:30,652 --> 00:04:32,760
Thanks for bringing
in the business, Chip.
120
00:04:32,785 --> 00:04:34,690
KEN: We're so proud of you, son!
121
00:04:34,838 --> 00:04:37,101
- KEN: I can call him that now, can't I?
- Yes.
122
00:04:37,126 --> 00:04:40,072
- KEN: I thought I could.
- Well, you did, so...
123
00:04:40,628 --> 00:04:42,275
Hi, little boy.
124
00:04:42,629 --> 00:04:44,931
Hi, little boy. Come to Mama.
125
00:04:44,986 --> 00:04:46,658
- Aw...
- Good boy.
126
00:04:47,073 --> 00:04:49,290
- Is there a disposable?
- That's cool. All good.
127
00:04:49,323 --> 00:04:50,323
Thanks, Big Chip.
128
00:04:50,439 --> 00:04:51,814
That's a good boy.
129
00:04:51,839 --> 00:04:53,853
MRS. BASKETS: Anyway,
keep up the good work,
130
00:04:53,878 --> 00:04:55,298
honey, and good night.
131
00:04:56,039 --> 00:04:58,892
Does it hang up on its own,
or do I have to click off?
132
00:05:03,259 --> 00:05:04,728
(SIGHS)
133
00:05:05,660 --> 00:05:06,869
(SNORING SOFTLY)
134
00:05:11,731 --> 00:05:14,037
- (TRINITY SCREAMING)
- (GASPING)
135
00:05:14,062 --> 00:05:16,064
(BABY CHIP CRYING)
136
00:05:16,089 --> 00:05:18,306
- Is everything okay?
- It's fine. It's okay.
137
00:05:18,331 --> 00:05:21,595
It's just that Baby, um...
Baby Chip threw up everywhere
138
00:05:21,620 --> 00:05:23,705
in the middle of the night
and he almost choked to death.
139
00:05:23,730 --> 00:05:25,126
But it's okay, he didn't.
140
00:05:25,151 --> 00:05:26,626
(CRYING): He didn't, did you?
141
00:05:26,651 --> 00:05:28,633
- JODE: Baby... (GAGS)
- Okay, here, take the baby.
142
00:05:28,658 --> 00:05:30,758
- Change his jammies.
- JODE: The baby just freaked out
143
00:05:30,783 --> 00:05:31,806
and spewed everywhere.
144
00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:33,283
- TRINITY: Go get us some new sheets.
- (JODE COUGHING)
145
00:05:33,308 --> 00:05:34,392
Okay?
146
00:05:35,751 --> 00:05:37,126
Wait, where they at?
147
00:05:37,151 --> 00:05:40,322
God, Jody...!
148
00:05:40,671 --> 00:05:42,938
- Give me my baby.
- (PHONE RINGING)
149
00:05:42,963 --> 00:05:44,829
- Give him to me.
- Let me get that phone.
150
00:05:45,759 --> 00:05:47,493
- (RETCHING, COUGHING)
- Pick it up.
151
00:05:47,885 --> 00:05:50,204
(PANTING): There. Oh, it's okay.
152
00:05:51,048 --> 00:05:53,110
Hello? Dr. Rubinstein?
153
00:05:53,135 --> 00:05:54,993
Hey, man. Yeah, yeah.
154
00:05:55,018 --> 00:05:57,533
(RETCHING)
155
00:05:58,358 --> 00:05:59,421
Thanks, man.
156
00:05:59,446 --> 00:06:00,846
What did he say?
157
00:06:00,971 --> 00:06:02,431
He wants me to go get Pedialyte.
158
00:06:02,456 --> 00:06:04,822
I got to go to the 24-hour
pharmacy on 15th.
159
00:06:06,629 --> 00:06:08,438
- (CRYING): No, don't leave me!
- It's okay, baby.
160
00:06:08,463 --> 00:06:09,754
Don't leave me, baby!
161
00:06:09,779 --> 00:06:10,848
- It's gonna be okay. All right?
- Baby...
162
00:06:10,873 --> 00:06:12,744
Okay, I-I-I-I-I'll go.
163
00:06:12,769 --> 00:06:15,231
- I can go. Yeah, I'll go.
- (COUGHING, CRYING)
164
00:06:15,256 --> 00:06:17,258
(MUZAK PLAYING QUIETLY)
165
00:06:37,734 --> 00:06:40,911
(BABY CHIP CRYING)
166
00:06:50,572 --> 00:06:52,574
(CRYING SOFTENS)
167
00:06:59,503 --> 00:07:01,505
(INSECTS CHIRPING)
168
00:07:13,982 --> 00:07:15,473
Chip, your mom keeps calling.
169
00:07:15,498 --> 00:07:17,801
(PHONE RINGING, BUZZING)
170
00:07:18,259 --> 00:07:20,551
Huh? Yeah?
171
00:07:20,576 --> 00:07:21,576
- MRS. BASKETS: Chip?
- Huh?
172
00:07:21,601 --> 00:07:23,755
Daniel Kwon called me.
He says no one was
173
00:07:23,780 --> 00:07:26,155
- at the rodeo to open the parking lot.
- What? Oh, di...
174
00:07:26,180 --> 00:07:28,991
- He's been waiting there an hour.
- Huh?
175
00:07:29,016 --> 00:07:30,022
Chip?
176
00:07:30,505 --> 00:07:33,304
Did the people at that
apartment give you some drugs?
177
00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:36,328
- Yeah.
- (HORNS HONKING)
178
00:07:39,992 --> 00:07:42,057
(GATE CREAKING)
179
00:07:42,082 --> 00:07:43,953
It's open! Come on!
180
00:07:54,314 --> 00:07:55,484
He's new at this, Christine.
181
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,312
I'm sure it was just a one-time thing.
182
00:07:57,770 --> 00:08:00,483
The rodeo's too much
responsibility for him.
183
00:08:00,508 --> 00:08:02,808
He's really just
a front-of-the-house guy.
184
00:08:03,038 --> 00:08:04,551
Just go easy on him.
185
00:08:04,879 --> 00:08:05,973
I love you, Ken,
186
00:08:05,998 --> 00:08:09,293
but I don't agree with
your management style.
187
00:08:09,345 --> 00:08:10,942
(HORN HONKING)
188
00:08:12,184 --> 00:08:15,106
- What up, what up?
- Hey.
189
00:08:15,577 --> 00:08:16,577
Sorry I'm late.
190
00:08:16,728 --> 00:08:19,339
Are you, you living with a baby now?
191
00:08:19,364 --> 00:08:21,176
JODE: This is uh,
Baby Chip, Mrs. Baskets.
192
00:08:21,201 --> 00:08:23,229
We named him after Big Chip, the hero.
193
00:08:23,254 --> 00:08:24,543
He saved Baby Chip last night,
194
00:08:24,568 --> 00:08:26,317
- so...
- Wow.
195
00:08:26,342 --> 00:08:27,356
... we brought...
196
00:08:27,834 --> 00:08:29,443
- Arby's. Free.
- Free Arby's.
197
00:08:29,513 --> 00:08:32,254
Curly fries, uh, and two Big Kahunas.
198
00:08:32,393 --> 00:08:33,802
- This one kind of opened up.
- Oh.
199
00:08:34,637 --> 00:08:36,631
- Here you go.
- Well, that's very nice of you.
200
00:08:36,981 --> 00:08:38,402
You take that, honey.
201
00:08:39,037 --> 00:08:41,175
I need to talk to the big Chip.
202
00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:43,811
- JODE: All right, cool. Peace.
- (TIRES SCREECHING)
203
00:08:44,470 --> 00:08:46,182
- MRS. BASKETS: Jesus.
- What do you want?
204
00:08:46,207 --> 00:08:47,524
- Wh-Where are we going?
- Is he a maniac or what?
205
00:08:47,549 --> 00:08:48,846
There's a baby in there.
206
00:08:48,949 --> 00:08:51,784
KEN: So, Chip, what's your plan?
207
00:08:52,628 --> 00:08:55,031
Uh... I don't know, I was gonna
go back to the apartment
208
00:08:55,056 --> 00:08:56,948
and take a nap and then
maybe have a siesta.
209
00:08:56,973 --> 00:08:58,279
And then, after that, take a break.
210
00:08:58,304 --> 00:09:01,003
No. What's the plan for your life, Chip?
211
00:09:01,461 --> 00:09:04,174
What's your one-year plan?
What's your five-year plan?
212
00:09:04,199 --> 00:09:06,299
Every man should
have a plan for his future.
213
00:09:06,324 --> 00:09:08,299
Yeah. Uh...
214
00:09:08,324 --> 00:09:10,448
When you're our age,
are you still gonna be living
215
00:09:10,473 --> 00:09:12,258
with these circus geeks and their kid?
216
00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:15,393
Well, I really haven't thought
of it, but, God, I hope not.
217
00:09:15,418 --> 00:09:17,620
You need to find
a serious place to live.
218
00:09:18,232 --> 00:09:20,479
Until you do, please come home.
219
00:09:22,128 --> 00:09:24,626
- Chris...
- What? We've got so much room.
220
00:09:24,901 --> 00:09:26,924
You'll hardly know he's there.
221
00:09:27,284 --> 00:09:29,674
- Chip.
- (SNORING)
222
00:09:29,979 --> 00:09:31,471
- KEN: Chip?
- Yes.
223
00:09:31,496 --> 00:09:34,542
You're sleeping
while I'm talking to you.
224
00:09:34,799 --> 00:09:37,589
I just want you to know
you're welcome to come home.
225
00:09:38,811 --> 00:09:40,190
Um...
226
00:09:40,873 --> 00:09:43,034
Well, Martha's looking
for apartments, Mom,
227
00:09:43,059 --> 00:09:44,646
I apprec... I-I do appreciate that,
228
00:09:44,671 --> 00:09:46,354
and I-I just don't want
to disappoint her.
229
00:09:46,688 --> 00:09:49,079
KEN: Yeah, I think Chip's got
a handle on this, Christine.
230
00:09:49,104 --> 00:09:51,377
Why don't we just enjoy
the food? It's free.
231
00:09:52,698 --> 00:09:55,525
Have you seen any of the
places that Martha has picked out?
232
00:09:55,824 --> 00:09:57,142
That would be a negative. No.
233
00:09:57,167 --> 00:09:59,095
Chip, you've got to look at the places
234
00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:00,424
in order to pick one.
235
00:10:03,534 --> 00:10:05,767
- Look at this.
- (LAUGHTER)
236
00:10:06,152 --> 00:10:07,345
KEN: That's a good one.
237
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:12,689
It's good, uh, economy. Single.
238
00:10:12,714 --> 00:10:15,595
Yeah. Well, at least
this one has a window.
239
00:10:16,178 --> 00:10:18,441
MRS. BROOKS: Ooh.
It smells funny in here.
240
00:10:18,637 --> 00:10:21,688
Um, that's just 'cause your
other senses are heightened.
241
00:10:21,713 --> 00:10:22,720
CHIP: How much is this place?
242
00:10:22,745 --> 00:10:24,642
- $900.
- (STAMMERS) No, no, let me handle it.
243
00:10:24,754 --> 00:10:27,650
Allen, I've been working
with a life coach.
244
00:10:27,675 --> 00:10:29,056
- Uh-huh.
- ... and I'm sorry,
245
00:10:29,081 --> 00:10:31,486
but I'm gonna have to be
really assertive with you.
246
00:10:31,511 --> 00:10:33,382
- We are not...
- Oh, my God...
247
00:10:34,684 --> 00:10:36,041
ALLEN: Uh, good window.
248
00:10:36,066 --> 00:10:38,252
Good, good view.
249
00:10:38,725 --> 00:10:40,767
- Maybe we'll keep looking.
- Uh...
250
00:10:45,048 --> 00:10:47,385
(SIGHS) I'm so tired.
251
00:10:47,410 --> 00:10:49,447
I don't know if this is the
best time for me to be doing this.
252
00:10:49,472 --> 00:10:52,494
I-I mean, all this... searching.
253
00:10:53,157 --> 00:10:55,697
MARTHA: Well, why don't you
just move back in with your mom?
254
00:10:55,722 --> 00:10:58,291
- Save money.
- What am I saving money for?
255
00:10:58,316 --> 00:11:00,318
- Cashmere socks.
- What?
256
00:11:00,343 --> 00:11:03,172
- Mom, you're awake.
- I have to go pee-pee.
257
00:11:03,197 --> 00:11:04,525
- Oh.
- What's this place?
258
00:11:04,550 --> 00:11:06,392
- Where?
- I don't know, it looks cool.
259
00:11:06,417 --> 00:11:07,479
- MARTHA: Where?
- W... this place.
260
00:11:07,504 --> 00:11:08,510
That building. Pull over.
261
00:11:08,535 --> 00:11:10,284
- MARTHA: Okay.
- Put your turn signal on.
262
00:11:11,046 --> 00:11:12,393
- (SIGNAL CLICKING)
- (TIRES SCREECH)
263
00:11:12,901 --> 00:11:14,237
Oh, God.
264
00:11:14,270 --> 00:11:15,432
- Oh... sorry, guys.
- What was that?
265
00:11:15,457 --> 00:11:17,459
I'm sorry. Are you all right, Mom?
266
00:11:17,484 --> 00:11:18,995
Yeah, I think I'll survive.
267
00:11:19,020 --> 00:11:20,370
Hey, look at this. Open house.
268
00:11:20,395 --> 00:11:21,907
MARTHA: Oh, Bullet Towers?
269
00:11:21,932 --> 00:11:23,524
This place is new.
270
00:11:23,549 --> 00:11:25,104
Hey, Mom, do you mind if we go in?
271
00:11:25,129 --> 00:11:27,082
They probably have
a bathroom you can use.
272
00:11:27,107 --> 00:11:28,496
Oh, thank God.
273
00:11:28,837 --> 00:11:32,524
NARRATOR: Bullet Towers,
the future of Bakersfield.
274
00:11:32,549 --> 00:11:34,852
A sophisticated standard of living.
275
00:11:35,183 --> 00:11:36,594
Luxurious amenities,
276
00:11:36,619 --> 00:11:38,766
marble counters in every kitchen,
277
00:11:38,791 --> 00:11:41,993
walking distance from
Bakersfield's finest shops,
278
00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:45,407
and only a few steps from
California's bullet train.
279
00:11:45,432 --> 00:11:47,618
Zoom to the metropolis of your choice,
280
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:51,195
all while enjoying the calm
sanctuary of Bakersfield.
281
00:11:51,589 --> 00:11:55,172
Come taste the future at Bullet Towers.
282
00:11:57,047 --> 00:11:59,102
This is our standard studio unit,
283
00:11:59,127 --> 00:12:00,782
and I'm actually in one of these...
284
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:01,845
It's exceptional.
285
00:12:01,870 --> 00:12:03,829
Um, everything is brand-new.
286
00:12:03,998 --> 00:12:07,024
- Central AC, gas range...
- Yeah. It's nice.
287
00:12:07,049 --> 00:12:09,243
Uh, yeah. Access to
common area roof deck.
288
00:12:09,751 --> 00:12:12,407
Um, counter-counters that are marble
289
00:12:12,432 --> 00:12:13,680
if you choose the right ones,
290
00:12:13,705 --> 00:12:14,993
but they didn't in this one.
291
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:18,594
Um, so, and then, and then this unit
292
00:12:18,619 --> 00:12:21,235
has central courtyard
views and washer-dryer.
293
00:12:21,260 --> 00:12:23,907
- Oh, look at this.
- ANITA: It's a really,
294
00:12:23,938 --> 00:12:26,368
really great community
that we're building here.
295
00:12:26,393 --> 00:12:28,525
- Nice view.
- ANITA: Do you two have kids?
296
00:12:28,550 --> 00:12:29,550
Who?
297
00:12:30,329 --> 00:12:32,563
- ANITA: Or...
- No, that's, that's just Martha
298
00:12:32,588 --> 00:12:33,994
and that's her visually impaired mother.
299
00:12:34,019 --> 00:12:35,502
She's probably looking for
the restroom right now.
300
00:12:35,527 --> 00:12:36,893
- Oh.
- Whoopsie.
301
00:12:37,407 --> 00:12:38,783
So you'd be getting
in on the ground floor
302
00:12:38,808 --> 00:12:40,332
of a really great investment,
303
00:12:40,357 --> 00:12:42,807
especially in seven
to nine years from now,
304
00:12:42,832 --> 00:12:44,986
- when the bullet train's completed.
- CHIP: Right.
305
00:12:45,011 --> 00:12:47,072
- Yeah.
- Uh, yes, thank you, we have eyes.
306
00:12:47,097 --> 00:12:48,697
Let's get down to brass tacks:
307
00:12:48,722 --> 00:12:51,103
what is the monthly rent on this place?
308
00:12:51,128 --> 00:12:52,939
Oh, I'm s-sorry,
I think that there's been
309
00:12:52,964 --> 00:12:54,291
a little bit of a misunderstanding
310
00:12:54,316 --> 00:12:56,840
'cause this is a condo,
so you wouldn't be renting,
311
00:12:56,865 --> 00:12:58,018
you'd be buying.
312
00:12:58,417 --> 00:13:02,424
Oh. So I'd be a... I'd be a homeowner.
313
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,755
MARTHA: Well, that's out
of his price range.
314
00:13:04,969 --> 00:13:08,221
This was obviously a huge
waste of time. Mom, Chip.
315
00:13:08,246 --> 00:13:09,690
- Martha.
- Let's go.
316
00:13:09,715 --> 00:13:12,768
Okay. It's a nice place.
317
00:13:14,022 --> 00:13:15,022
Yeah.
318
00:13:15,793 --> 00:13:17,142
Those are free, right?
319
00:13:17,167 --> 00:13:19,096
- Mm, yup.
- Thanks.
320
00:13:19,121 --> 00:13:22,932
- Okay. So, you interested in...?
- In the waters.
321
00:13:22,957 --> 00:13:24,518
- Okay.
- Let's go!
322
00:13:26,246 --> 00:13:29,761
I like that place, but all
this is a waste of time, Martha,
323
00:13:29,786 --> 00:13:30,871
all of it.
324
00:13:31,649 --> 00:13:35,081
Here, Chiparoo, can't open it.
325
00:13:35,114 --> 00:13:36,114
- Mm.
- Oh.
326
00:13:36,772 --> 00:13:38,383
- We can keep looking.
- (SIGHS)
327
00:13:38,408 --> 00:13:40,323
I mean, why am I moving anyway?
328
00:13:40,348 --> 00:13:42,269
I can just get
noise-canceling headphones
329
00:13:42,294 --> 00:13:43,831
or earmuffs or whatever.
330
00:13:44,167 --> 00:13:46,871
You know, my life coach
could really help you.
331
00:13:47,685 --> 00:13:49,252
Life... Do you really have a life coach?
332
00:13:49,286 --> 00:13:51,824
I thought that was a joke.
Is that why you're acting so weird?
333
00:13:51,849 --> 00:13:53,113
- I can't get this open.
- What?
334
00:13:53,893 --> 00:13:55,355
What time is it?
335
00:13:55,895 --> 00:13:58,987
Fudge. I have to be at
class in five minutes.
336
00:13:59,012 --> 00:14:01,714
Do you mind if we do that
first on the way to your place?
337
00:14:01,739 --> 00:14:04,417
Yes, I actually do mind
'cause Baby Chip is expecting me.
338
00:14:04,819 --> 00:14:06,230
Here, I can't get this open.
339
00:14:06,937 --> 00:14:09,449
Well, it's too late, we're almost there.
340
00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:11,722
- (SIGHING): Oh, God.
- It'll be good for you.
341
00:14:11,747 --> 00:14:13,316
(SIGHS)
342
00:14:13,809 --> 00:14:16,410
♪
343
00:14:19,394 --> 00:14:21,984
Just doesn't seem like
you to leave your mom
344
00:14:22,009 --> 00:14:23,345
sitting in a car, that's all.
345
00:14:23,370 --> 00:14:25,214
Well, I cracked the window.
346
00:14:26,848 --> 00:14:28,284
Okay, I'm-I'm gonna get out of here.
347
00:14:28,309 --> 00:14:30,066
This is not my scene.
I'm just gonna get some food.
348
00:14:30,551 --> 00:14:32,097
Okay, well, can you at least
349
00:14:32,122 --> 00:14:33,907
grab some meatballs for my mom?
350
00:14:33,932 --> 00:14:35,535
- Okay.
- Martha.
351
00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:37,344
- Oh. Hey.
- Hi, dear.
352
00:14:37,369 --> 00:14:38,902
I'm so glad you came.
353
00:14:39,108 --> 00:14:41,480
Hello, newcomer, what's your name?
354
00:14:42,353 --> 00:14:45,050
Oh, no, Martha...
Martha dragged me here.
355
00:14:45,075 --> 00:14:47,613
My name's Chip,
I'm not, I'm not staying.
356
00:14:47,949 --> 00:14:49,566
I'm-I'm just gonna get some meatballs,
357
00:14:49,591 --> 00:14:52,207
- then go to sleep in the car.
- Oh, that's okay, Chip.
358
00:14:52,232 --> 00:14:55,363
Um, this is my life coach Tammy. Stay.
359
00:14:55,388 --> 00:14:58,609
Well, hello, Chip, welcome.
360
00:14:59,011 --> 00:15:03,253
I ask nothing of you
except honesty, discretion,
361
00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:06,673
an open mind, and, of course, no phones.
362
00:15:06,698 --> 00:15:09,769
Everybody, give a hand to Chip,
363
00:15:09,794 --> 00:15:11,274
who's here for the first time tonight!
364
00:15:11,299 --> 00:15:13,371
No, I'm not... I'm not here to...
365
00:15:13,396 --> 00:15:15,074
TAMMY: Okay, Jonah, I hear you,
366
00:15:15,099 --> 00:15:17,832
but I need you to be
a lot more specific.
367
00:15:18,460 --> 00:15:20,433
JONAH: I've been fired
from all food court places,
368
00:15:20,458 --> 00:15:22,830
except for Salad Euphoria.
369
00:15:22,855 --> 00:15:24,541
- Okay, I've had enough.
- TAMMY: Mm-hmm.
370
00:15:24,566 --> 00:15:26,103
- So I started cutting myself again.
- Thank you for inviting me,
371
00:15:26,128 --> 00:15:27,464
or forcing me to come here.
372
00:15:27,489 --> 00:15:28,667
- Chip...
- Of course you did.
373
00:15:28,692 --> 00:15:30,284
- Please don't go.
- It makes sense.
374
00:15:30,309 --> 00:15:31,582
You were out of control.
375
00:15:31,607 --> 00:15:32,621
- When we cut...
- Sorry.
376
00:15:32,646 --> 00:15:33,646
... it's because we want to
377
00:15:33,671 --> 00:15:35,005
- get some control.
- Apologies.
378
00:15:35,030 --> 00:15:38,012
You're letting others
take control over you.
379
00:15:38,145 --> 00:15:40,090
Who's controlling you?
380
00:15:40,115 --> 00:15:42,871
Is it your bullying, hateful brother?
381
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:47,199
Is it a powerless father?
Is it a controlling mother?
382
00:15:47,224 --> 00:15:48,293
Who's in control?
383
00:15:48,318 --> 00:15:50,715
You are in charge.
384
00:15:51,086 --> 00:15:53,724
I want to hear you say it.
I am in F-ing charge.
385
00:15:53,889 --> 00:15:55,552
TAMMY AND JONAH: I am in F-ing charge.
386
00:15:55,577 --> 00:15:57,982
Everybody here say it because
it's true for all of you.
387
00:15:58,095 --> 00:16:00,812
ALL: I am in F-ing charge.
388
00:16:00,837 --> 00:16:02,419
(PHONE BUZZING, CHIMING)
389
00:16:02,636 --> 00:16:04,278
Chip, someone texting you?
390
00:16:04,303 --> 00:16:05,677
- You can sit.
- CHIP: Uh...
391
00:16:06,705 --> 00:16:08,130
No, I was just, uh...
392
00:16:08,454 --> 00:16:11,866
It's okay. Do you want to take
a moment and answer the text?
393
00:16:12,224 --> 00:16:13,224
No, it's just, uh...
394
00:16:13,249 --> 00:16:15,357
Can I see your phone?
I'd like to see who you're texting.
395
00:16:16,864 --> 00:16:18,458
(LAUGHING): Give it to me. I'm...
396
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,002
I'm not so scary as you think I am.
397
00:16:21,027 --> 00:16:23,021
I really am not, right, everybody?
398
00:16:23,511 --> 00:16:26,521
Aw, what a cutie.
399
00:16:26,546 --> 00:16:27,888
Is he yours?
400
00:16:28,794 --> 00:16:30,997
He's my roommate.
I mean, I live with him.
401
00:16:33,183 --> 00:16:34,402
Come here, Chip.
402
00:16:35,028 --> 00:16:36,036
Mm-hmm.
403
00:16:36,700 --> 00:16:38,021
Well, put your phone away.
404
00:16:38,046 --> 00:16:41,302
You're about to do something
very important for yourself.
405
00:16:41,613 --> 00:16:43,528
Everyone here
406
00:16:44,763 --> 00:16:47,396
is trying their goddamn best
407
00:16:47,629 --> 00:16:49,794
to find a way to get what they want.
408
00:16:49,819 --> 00:16:51,138
Right, everybody?
409
00:16:51,888 --> 00:16:54,028
What do you want, Chip?
410
00:16:54,375 --> 00:16:55,747
What do you want?
411
00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:58,919
Uh, I don't know.
412
00:17:00,177 --> 00:17:01,732
I care about you, Chip.
413
00:17:02,953 --> 00:17:06,935
More than I want anything,
I want you to get it.
414
00:17:07,355 --> 00:17:08,923
You deserve it.
415
00:17:09,958 --> 00:17:11,411
What do you want?
416
00:17:17,327 --> 00:17:19,634
I want to move out of
the place l'm living in.
417
00:17:20,482 --> 00:17:22,191
I work all day, then I go home at night
418
00:17:22,216 --> 00:17:23,354
to help out with the baby,
419
00:17:23,379 --> 00:17:26,239
and the baby cries all the time,
and I'm exhausted.
420
00:17:28,305 --> 00:17:29,544
What's stopping you?
421
00:17:30,456 --> 00:17:32,411
I can't find an apartment.
422
00:17:33,311 --> 00:17:35,128
MARTHA: I found him three apartments.
423
00:17:35,153 --> 00:17:37,574
- CHIP (GROANS): Ugh...
- But he didn't like any of 'em.
424
00:17:37,599 --> 00:17:40,099
- Except the, the condo, but...
- (GROANS): Ugh...
425
00:17:40,124 --> 00:17:41,786
he can't afford to buy it.
426
00:17:41,811 --> 00:17:43,138
See what else I've
been dealing with here?
427
00:17:43,163 --> 00:17:45,435
You know, Martha,
he's got to do this for himself.
428
00:17:45,460 --> 00:17:47,245
Can't afford? What does that mean?
429
00:17:47,270 --> 00:17:48,521
It means I don't have the money
430
00:17:48,546 --> 00:17:50,357
- for an apartment.
- No, no. (CHUCKLING): No.
431
00:17:50,382 --> 00:17:53,054
What does it really mean?
432
00:17:53,912 --> 00:17:55,403
Let's look at this another way.
433
00:17:56,100 --> 00:17:57,325
You are Chip.
434
00:17:57,894 --> 00:17:59,044
Chip who?
435
00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:02,207
- (WHISPERING): Baskets.
- I know my last name, Martha.
436
00:18:02,232 --> 00:18:03,481
Ba-Baskets.
437
00:18:03,524 --> 00:18:05,787
- Chip Baskets?
- Yeah.
438
00:18:05,812 --> 00:18:06,812
(CHUCKLING): Wow.
439
00:18:07,175 --> 00:18:08,435
Chip Baskets.
440
00:18:09,419 --> 00:18:11,607
Your mother liked a lot of Mexican food.
441
00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:13,802
(LAUGHTER)
442
00:18:14,533 --> 00:18:16,491
What do you do
for a living, Chip Baskets?
443
00:18:16,950 --> 00:18:18,403
I'm a rodeo clown.
444
00:18:19,454 --> 00:18:21,450
My mom owns and runs a rodeo,
445
00:18:21,475 --> 00:18:24,646
and I-I clown there
during the rodeo season.
446
00:18:24,732 --> 00:18:26,607
He also does birthday parties.
447
00:18:26,632 --> 00:18:27,966
Martha, no.
448
00:18:28,114 --> 00:18:29,857
- Quiet.
- You clown
449
00:18:29,882 --> 00:18:32,528
in front of rodeo bulls?
450
00:18:32,684 --> 00:18:33,724
Mm-hmm.
451
00:18:34,255 --> 00:18:36,239
A baby can't do that, Chip.
452
00:18:36,264 --> 00:18:39,786
A baby pees in his diaper.
Big Chip doesn't do that.
453
00:18:39,811 --> 00:18:42,060
Baby Chip can't even walk.
454
00:18:42,085 --> 00:18:44,052
Big Chip can run.
455
00:18:44,291 --> 00:18:45,814
Big Chip can get his own apartment.
456
00:18:45,839 --> 00:18:48,802
What makes you think you
can't get your own apartment?
457
00:18:48,827 --> 00:18:51,333
- I can't get the money for that...
- No, no, no.
458
00:18:51,358 --> 00:18:52,786
It's not about the money.
459
00:18:52,811 --> 00:18:53,875
Look in my eyes.
460
00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:57,687
- Go... deeper!
- (POUNDING ON CHEST)
461
00:18:58,950 --> 00:19:00,333
Who's in charge of you?
462
00:19:00,686 --> 00:19:03,124
Let's go there. Jonah?
Tell him who's in charge.
463
00:19:03,149 --> 00:19:04,302
JONAH: Uh...
464
00:19:04,327 --> 00:19:05,327
I forgot.
465
00:19:05,352 --> 00:19:08,042
You are in charge of you.
466
00:19:08,067 --> 00:19:09,521
What are you afraid of?
467
00:19:11,027 --> 00:19:12,027
I'm...
468
00:19:14,882 --> 00:19:17,286
What is it? Change?
469
00:19:18,369 --> 00:19:19,943
If I get the apartment,
then I might have...
470
00:19:20,794 --> 00:19:22,013
might have to change,
is that what you're saying?
471
00:19:22,038 --> 00:19:25,146
Yes, you'd have to earn more.
You'd have a mortgage.
472
00:19:25,209 --> 00:19:26,888
But you'd be happy.
473
00:19:28,294 --> 00:19:29,755
Uh, I want to, I...
474
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:32,872
(WHISPERING): I want to be happy,
I'm just frightened of it.
475
00:19:32,897 --> 00:19:34,747
- Aw...
- If I know how to do it.
476
00:19:34,772 --> 00:19:36,568
That's it, that's it, that's it.
477
00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:40,489
He said he's scared to be happy,
but he wants to be happy.
478
00:19:40,514 --> 00:19:42,263
- (APPLAUSE)
- He found it, everybody.
479
00:19:43,494 --> 00:19:45,872
You found it.
480
00:19:46,277 --> 00:19:49,040
Okay, everybody, he found it.
481
00:19:49,065 --> 00:19:51,502
(CHUCKLES)
482
00:19:51,527 --> 00:19:54,318
All right, now let's get
you that apartment!
483
00:20:00,318 --> 00:20:02,044
- Ken.
- KEN: In the kitchen.
484
00:20:02,786 --> 00:20:05,020
I'm thinking we should order a pizza.
485
00:20:05,045 --> 00:20:07,575
I just feel like, uh,
eating and going to bed.
486
00:20:07,997 --> 00:20:10,668
- Voilà!
- Oh. What is this?
487
00:20:10,693 --> 00:20:13,262
- You got to try this.
- Where did you get this?
488
00:20:13,287 --> 00:20:14,566
- Olive spread.
- Oh, good.
489
00:20:14,591 --> 00:20:16,778
With cheese and cracker.
490
00:20:16,803 --> 00:20:19,330
- Oh, my God.
- And a little sliced tomato.
491
00:20:19,355 --> 00:20:21,401
- You're cheering me up already.
- (CHUCKLES)
492
00:20:22,239 --> 00:20:24,802
- Mmm. Mmm!
- Good, huh? Yeah.
493
00:20:25,024 --> 00:20:27,599
And so distinctive, the taste.
494
00:20:28,187 --> 00:20:29,187
You know,
495
00:20:30,778 --> 00:20:33,345
I just wanted things
to go well for Chip.
496
00:20:33,370 --> 00:20:36,562
Yeah, Chip's an independent guy.
He did fine today.
497
00:20:36,981 --> 00:20:39,648
We're only there to help
out when he needs us.
498
00:20:40,569 --> 00:20:42,616
You're so wise, you know?
499
00:20:42,757 --> 00:20:44,443
I should listen to you more.
500
00:20:44,467 --> 00:20:45,757
(PHONE RINGING)
501
00:20:45,782 --> 00:20:47,562
(WHISPERING):
I can be such a know-it-all.
502
00:20:47,587 --> 00:20:48,587
(KEN CHUCKLES)
503
00:20:48,612 --> 00:20:50,266
Hello, Chip.
504
00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:51,379
Hey, Mom.
505
00:20:51,570 --> 00:20:52,937
Investment.
506
00:20:53,616 --> 00:20:55,687
Uh, Mom, I wanted to tell you
507
00:20:55,712 --> 00:20:57,562
about an investment opportunity.
508
00:20:57,587 --> 00:20:59,741
MRS. BASKETS: Chip,
I'm gonna tell you about
509
00:20:59,766 --> 00:21:01,507
olive "tap-pen-yah-dee."
510
00:21:01,894 --> 00:21:04,418
Ken just rooted around the boxes,
511
00:21:04,443 --> 00:21:08,752
and he found me
a delicious crudités tray.
512
00:21:09,362 --> 00:21:10,435
That sounds good.
513
00:21:10,460 --> 00:21:11,655
It was out of this world.
514
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:13,507
I just never had anything like it.
515
00:21:13,627 --> 00:21:14,921
(WHISPERING): Investment.
516
00:21:14,946 --> 00:21:16,513
Okay, yeah, I'll look into that.
517
00:21:16,538 --> 00:21:19,163
But-but-but, listen, hey,
there-there's a, u-um,
518
00:21:19,188 --> 00:21:20,843
a new condo on the east side of town
519
00:21:20,868 --> 00:21:22,391
called the Bullet Towers, Mom?
520
00:21:22,416 --> 00:21:26,045
Oh, you found a place to live,
Chip? That's great.
521
00:21:26,225 --> 00:21:29,732
But I need, um... I need a down payment.
522
00:21:30,340 --> 00:21:31,350
You'll pay her back.
523
00:21:31,375 --> 00:21:33,154
And I'll-I'll pay you back, uh,
524
00:21:33,179 --> 00:21:35,521
w-with interest, so it'll be
a good investment for you.
525
00:21:35,546 --> 00:21:36,896
- Mmm.
- KEN: What's going on?
526
00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:40,838
He, uh, found a-a condo,
the Bullet House, and
527
00:21:40,863 --> 00:21:44,808
it's in a complex and he,
uh, needs a down payment.
528
00:21:44,833 --> 00:21:45,833
(PHONE BEEPS)
529
00:21:46,713 --> 00:21:48,551
Looks like he needs us, right?
530
00:21:48,950 --> 00:21:49,950
Yeah.
531
00:21:50,586 --> 00:21:53,486
It looks like he needs us. Hmm.
532
00:21:54,586 --> 00:21:55,713
Yeah, I'm still here.
533
00:21:57,028 --> 00:21:58,028
Okay.
534
00:21:58,889 --> 00:22:00,017
I understand.
535
00:22:02,396 --> 00:22:03,396
Okay.
536
00:22:04,759 --> 00:22:06,108
Bye.
537
00:22:06,322 --> 00:22:07,322
(PHONE BEEPS)
538
00:22:07,866 --> 00:22:10,259
- She said yes.
- (CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
539
00:22:10,284 --> 00:22:13,478
Yeah, yes! My favorite word.
540
00:22:13,503 --> 00:22:15,113
Come on, we're gonna dance.
541
00:22:15,138 --> 00:22:17,056
- I don't dance.
- Yeah, well, we all dance.
542
00:22:17,081 --> 00:22:18,830
We're gonna dance to the word "yes."
543
00:22:19,551 --> 00:22:22,377
(CHANTING): Go, Chip!
Go, Chip! Go, Chip!
544
00:22:22,402 --> 00:22:26,087
You are a homeowner now!
545
00:22:26,112 --> 00:22:27,744
Yay, Chip!
546
00:22:27,769 --> 00:22:30,510
Go, Chip! Go, Chip! Go, Chip!
547
00:22:30,875 --> 00:22:32,681
Go, Chip! Go, Chip!
548
00:22:32,706 --> 00:22:36,166
Oh, my goodness, these are
so tight... your shoulders.
549
00:22:36,191 --> 00:22:37,463
We dance here.
550
00:22:37,488 --> 00:22:40,291
You're gonna have to loosen
up a little to hang out here.
551
00:22:40,316 --> 00:22:42,384
Go, Chip! Go, Chip!
552
00:22:42,409 --> 00:22:43,474
(MUFFLED): Go, Chip!
553
00:22:43,499 --> 00:22:47,623
- (MUSIC MUFFLED)
- ♪ Ain't no stopping us now ♪
554
00:22:48,013 --> 00:22:49,482
♪ We're on the move ♪
555
00:22:53,263 --> 00:22:55,592
(NORMAL AUDIO):
♪ Ain't no stopping us now ♪
556
00:22:55,617 --> 00:22:56,670
♪ No, no, no ♪
557
00:22:56,695 --> 00:22:58,068
♪ We're on the move ♪
558
00:22:58,498 --> 00:23:01,427
♪ We're moving, we're grooving ♪
559
00:23:01,452 --> 00:23:04,852
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
41166
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