Original subtitles

With you, it's not another love affair.

A night of passing whispers.

A night of forgotten faces.

Bitter kisses all night.

I'm silly. I use my own.

Want to use the bathroom?

Ted, don't rush.

Can't we just talk for a little while?

No, I'd love to, but rehearsals.

You still don't think I can make it, do you?

It's not talking.

Well, when are we going to talk about it?

You know, I'm leaving tomorrow.

Okay, I still think it's a mistake.

Thousands of girls every year go to New York.

Fall on their faces. They're all hoping to succeed.

Most of them end up as broken -down waitresses or doing trade shows.

Now, is that what you all know you've been doing, huh?

Now, you've only got a year left to do in graduate school, huh?

Now, you don't want to blow it all out for what?

What's a degree in drama going to get me, huh? A teaching job? Listen, you

teach.

Fine. Do you know how hard those jobs are to get?

I've stood at the job boards and watched those other drooling grad students just

aching for a junior high school spot in the middle of nowhere.

I want to give it a try.

I don't want to look back with regret.

You know, if only I had gone to New York, I could have been on Broadway.

I'm sorry, Ted.

You said I was good.

You said my acting had a spiritual aesthetic.

I don't know. I'm sure you do.

Listen to me, damn it.

Okay.

You wanted my opinion, I gave it to you.

Stay. Do you really want me to?

Of course I do. Why do you think I'd take a chance just to be with you, huh?

Look what I got.

I can't.

I'll take it.

Ten.

Oh, listen, take those panties off. God, I want some of that right now. It's

been so long.

What about Arlene?

Oh, God, I haven't touched her in a year.

Then why are you still with her?

Oh, mind that. Now I want you.

Ted, kiss me. I'm not ready.

Oh, no.

Oh, Ted.

Oh. Oh.

Oh.

Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

No, honey, hold on.

Hold on.

Not yet.

Honey. No, not yet.

You're serious about this New York thing, huh?

Well, what about us?

Well, that's up to you.

You know you're the only woman I care about.

And your wife?

You know I can't leave her. She can't function without me.

You've got to trust me on this. Listen, we've got a good thing going. Come on,

let's not lose it, huh?

Then you'll come and see me in New York?

Well, I guess if I can't change your mind, I'll come and see you every week.

Get yourself a little apartment.

We can fuck all night. How do you like that, my itty -bitty darling?

Sounds great.

Oh, Jesus, I've got to go. Check off calls. Listen, what do I owe you for the

room? Forget about it.

Well, here.

Remember, when you accept your Tony, don't forget who got you your start.

Billy? Billy?

Billy?

Billy, I want to talk to you.

Billy, give me a minute.

Billy, you walked right out. You didn't even give me a chance.

I don't want to talk about it. I'm done. I quit. I'm through with hustling for

good. I've heard that before. Listen, you can't leave like this. You have

people to consider.

I only have one person to consider.

Myself. Honey.

You've got a lot to learn.

You're a fucking whore.

Was.

I got a job, a real job.

Look, baby, we've got clients, and every day that you're out, we're losing big

bucks.

Didn't I treat you right, Billy?

Didn't I give you everything you needed?

Like three times in jail?

I bailed you out. What about the clap?

I got you a doctor, a very good man, the mayor's own doctor. What more could you

want? What about a future? Can't find one on your back.

Oh, big fucking deal. Once a night.

You know, you have really got it good.

How do you expect to keep yourself dressed like that? And what about the

Palm Springs?

And look at this apartment.

Ming ain't cheap, sweetheart.

And you've got a job that's going to pay for all of this?

None of your goddamn business.

Probably not.

But I do care about you, Billy.

And I don't want to see you get hurt.

Don't worry, I'll survive.

And if you're concerned about how I'm going to keep this apartment... I've

solved it.

Oh? Find your daddy?

I'm getting roommates.

Roommates? Oh, I can hear it now.

Oh, we'll put the stereo in the living room, and we'll put the Donny Osmond

poster over there, and the incense holder over there.

Jesus.

I see you've really thought this one out, haven't you?

I guess I'm just wasting my time.

I suppose you know that you can't close the door on your past.

And it always comes back to you.

It always does.

Always.

Billy, I just want you to know that you've been very special to me.

Very special.

Hello? Yes, it is.

Oh, the ad.

Yes, I still have the two rooms available.

They're both quite nice.

You'll have access to the living room and full kitchen.

And there's lots of light.

Do you like plants?

All right, that's good. That's good. That's fine.

All right, a little more.

Here's now. Okay, now, now, look.

Defiant Adam. Yes.

That's the one.

Yes. That's it.

That's it. All right. Yes. No, no, no, no, no, no. Give me some hair. Shake the

hair. Shake. Yeah. Yeah. Yes.

Yes. Yes.

Yes. Yes. Okay. Right. Right into the camera.

Yes. Good.

Yes. All right. Okay. Take five.

Steve, kill the lights. I've got to change the film.

I've got plenty of stuff.

Yeah? Anytime you want it, beautiful.

How about lewds? Sure.

Tewies, greenies, acid, horse shit.

Maybe you can stop by my place later.

Sit around.

Get high.

And, uh, you know.

Yeah, maybe.

I don't know. I'm moving my stuff.

Moving?

I'm sharing an apartment.

Aren't you going back to L .A.?

No. I think we're going to New York a shot.

I'm so tired of this Hollywood jerk -off. All right.

Cut to crap. Let's get back to work.

See you later?

Sure.

Hi.

I'm Sherry.

Yeah? I'm supposed to be moving in. Oh! Oh, I'm sorry!

Come on in!

Gosh, I'm sorry.

Billy! Billy!

It's a new girl. She's here.

I'm Joan Harmon. I just moved in yesterday.

Oh, there you are. We thought you'd be here this morning.

Yeah, but I forgot I had a job this morning. What do you do?

I model.

The Magdalene Agency?

You know, their girls are in glamour, vogue. Vogue? Really?

Where'd you go to school?

Where do you want me?

Oh, shit. I'm sorry.

Right this way. Your room is the one in the back.

I think you like this plane.

You know, our fields aren't really that far apart.

I'm an actress.

Yeah, no.

Yeah, hold on.

Billy! Billy! It's for you.

As I was saying, I'm an actress.

Hello? In theater.

Told you not to call here anymore. I'm out of the business.

I don't care what she said. Why don't you go fuck her?

No, you see, I'm just getting started. But tomorrow's my big day. It's my first

audition.

A musical?

No, I mean, musicals are fine. You know, something like West Side Story.

I want to do something serious, like Euripides.

That's an old one. I don't know about either of you girls, but I could show

the drink.

What you got? Almost anything.

How about Jack Daniels straight up? You got it. Joan?

Fine, I'll have the same thing.

With orange juice, please.

Are you sure?

Uh -huh.

Oh, before I forget, I'm having the phone number changed.

Oh, good.

Billy tells me you're from California.

Do you have family there?

Sort of. My mom. Oh, someone's really being excited about you moving to New

York, huh?

Not really. We don't get along.

What do you do in this neighborhood?

Oh, the usual assortment of discos, dives, single bars, all ready to fuck

over.

Well, let's do it.

What?

Here's to both of you. May you pay your rent on the first.

Oh, but I don't know. I can't help it.

I think I love him.

Does he love you?

I don't know.

Sometimes I think so.

God, you know, he would love it here.

He loves natural theater.

Hey, what's his name?

Amos. What?

You know, hi.

from film.

I know a sister production manager doesn't sound so great, but in this

I feel that I've got a future. What?

Someday, I feel I've got a future.

Someday, I might even be a producer.

Sherry Lansing will.

Guys, I hate to break up a party.

We'll just split.

With that guy?

You don't even know him. So what?

But isn't that dangerous?

That makes more fun.

See you guys.

Don't worry, Joanie. She can handle herself.

Well, come on in.

Well, what do you think?

Dig the place?

Hi.

What is it?

What is it?

Oh, one second.

Right there.

Dig that.

I'll get up to you after that.

You know

what I wanna do?

What?

Fuck you.

Wait a second.

Huh?

I got a job to get to, you know.

Where am I?

You're in Queens. Where the fuck do you think you are?

Queens?

As in New York. You ever hear of it?

Just show me how to get back to spending time on the street, okay?

Out there.

That son of a bitch!

For five years, I really believed I was helpless.

Like some kind of a pet.

Every time I talked about a career, he put me down.

Excuse me, but let's try this with a sense of honesty.

Which year are you in?

Well, I really don't have any, but I've gotten loads of experience. No, no, no.

Sorry, but we're really neat with all the credits.

Everybody's sorry.

My tongue will tell the anger of my heart, or else my heart concealing it

break. And rather than it shall, I will be free, even to the uttermost, as I

please, in word.

Pardon me, but can we try with a little more gas, y 'all? I'm impassioned.

Yes, dear, and how old are you?

Well, I just turned 25 last week.

Oh, I'm really sorry. You're much too old for the part.

Well, I work with Joseph Papp off Broadway. You might have seen me in

Under the Elm. Thank you. And I've been working on a modern choreography.

Dancing?

I'm sorry. I'm not a dancer.

I just turned 21 last week.

Well, we were looking for someone with a little bit more of a charisma.

Dance? Well, you ever hear of Martha Graham?

If they would have bought Simmons' luggage, that would have never happened.

Simmons' luggage is rugged, durable, and heavy.

Cut, cut.

Okay.

Let's all take it from the top.

Again.

Okay. Have you got the bands arranged for tomorrow? Yeah, they'll be on

at two. It took a little arm twisting, but I got them.

You know, Ron, I am worried about the Angelo Jean spot.

That director hasn't picked a girl yet. Well, find someone for him.

You trust me?

Trust you. After a week, you handle the business like an old pro.

All the agencies can get a model. You got it. Hey, Marv.

Marv? You haven't met Marv yet, have you? He's our sales rep. Marv, I want

to meet our newest hot shot. Billy.

Long time no see.

You know each other? Oh, sure. Billy and I settled a few deals together.

Worked rather closely, too, I might add.

That was a long time ago.

Excuse me.

Oh, sure.

She's a real pro.

Sarah?

I want you to sit down with me for a minute.

Yeah, Paul.

Okay, who's the next victim?

I am.

I'm Joan Harmon.

I'm Eddie.

Nice to meet you, Eddie.

As you can see, I've been the ACTF we want to know.

Hey, hey, relax.

This is not Broadway, you know. It's only a little showcase.

I know.

I really want that part.

You want to be my sister, huh?

Were you in it? Yeah, I was cast last week.

Blackmail. I typed his lousy script up. Listen,

can I give you a suggestion?

Sure. If you really want the part, he's looking for someone sexy.

Sexy? I... Yeah, first get rid of the glasses.

I can't read without them. Fake it, fake it.

And here, let the hair down.

Thank you.

We'll get in touch with you.

Eddie, who's next? This is Joe Harmon, and, uh, he studied with Gatch.

Kazan, really?

How long were you with him? Oh, just for a very, very short time.

Okay, here, just look it up on page 29.

You ready?

I think so.

Sarah, I want you to sit down with me for a minute.

Yeah, Pa?

I stopped by McNulty's today.

What'd you do that for?

Pa, I'm sticking by Sarah's side.

Pa, I'm sticking by Sarah's side.

Pa, I'm sticking by Sarah's side.

I got it. I got the part.

I don't know how to thank you, but thank you. Well, then, missus, seeing now

that we're family, how about joining me for some grub?

Lunch?

Well, I don't really have time, and I had an awfully late breakfast. Hey,

Thank you. Joan, you have nothing to worry about.

I'm gay.

Well, I didn't.

Oh,

shit. Well?

Lunch? Okay.

Terrific. Listen, I know this fantastic place.

All the looks of the Hudson, the food is superb, and the atmosphere is tops.

Good food, good view.

Eddie, this is great.

Three weeks of rehearsal, my first New York play. God, I can't wait to get

started. Oh, you'll get over it.

As soon as you see your first paycheck, zilch.

I don't care.

It's theater.

I still have to find a job. You know, something that pays some money.

Are you proud?

Can't afford to be. Good. Listen, there's a job opening where I work.

Long hours, short pay, good food.

By the way, you're eating it. Last night's special.

A waitressing job?

Yeah. Well, can you get me in?

Can I get you in?

I'm the maitre d'. And you are hired.

I got the one on the left.

I... I wasn't. Mm -hmm.

It's incredible.

Two jobs in one day. Of course, one pays and one doesn't, but who cares? I mean,

after all, Bernhardt had to suffer, too, didn't she?

Didn't you tell TB?

Oh, and you gotta meet Eddie. Oh, this guy is great. You'll love him.

Watch out. Couldn't be dangerous.

Why, did you have to be a professor friend?

No, I didn't.

Besides, Eddie's gay. At least that's what he said. Yeah, sure.

Anybody expecting anyone?

No.

Oh, Shelley, before I forget, I might have a job lined up for you. Another one

of those jeans commercials?

Oh, I get to do it with all your little laughs.

Bob,

what are you doing here?

Hey, is that any way to talk to Cleveland's best play?

I'm out of the business.

Bullshit. Just for a few minutes.

No, I've got company.

Hey, I've got the bread.

We'll have a little orgy.

They're straight, you know. Get out of here. Look, I only get to New York twice

a year. I'm on a blowjob.

Get lost.

Who the fuck do you think you're talking to, you fucking cunt whore bitch?

Get out of my life and stay out.

The fucking cops on your ass, you lousy slut.

Sorry, girl. I'd like to explain.

You don't have to.

Yes, I do.

You're my roommate, and I think you should know the truth.

If you haven't guessed by now, I was a hooker.

I don't regret it.

With a damn good living.

After a year of struggling in this goddamn town, loomy apartments, office

Casanovas, I found out there was another way.

And all of a sudden, like that!

I was part of the American dream.

Gucci handbags.

Cocktails at the plazas. Cats.

And all I had to do was spend two hours a night satisfying a lonely stranger.

It was fun.

Exciting. I felt like a rebel.

Even proud of it.

And then the strain.

Always on.

It was a riot.

A regular riot.

Some I didn't care for.

I couldn't take their money.

I could have died of loneliness.

Well, I'm out.

I beat the calendar.

It was only a matter of time before those $20 tricks, massage parlors.

Well, there you have it.

Confessions of an ex -call girl.

On sale now.

And finer.

Finer bookstores all over town.

Shh.

Look, I don't think that will happen again.

How could you let men take advantage of you like that?

You missed the point.

It was my choice.

I know it's just a showcase, but it's a great opportunity to get some

experience. I mean, who knows who will be in the audience?

Producers, agents... Anyway...

I'm in the title role of A Song for Sarah.

It's a little corny. Oh, but I love it.

Oh, God, I miss you, baby.

I miss you so much.

I thought of that body of yours every night.

Oh, it's so good.

Oh, yeah.

Please, Dad.

I want you inside me.

In a minute. Keep sucking.

You're faster.

Faster. Oh, God.

I'm coming. Suck it. Don't stop.

Oh, yeah. Mom?

Get dressed.

Oh, sorry. I've got to catch that 545.

I thought you were going to spend the night.

You know I can't do that. I've got to think of Arlene.

Come on.

Cheer up.

Yeah.

Better?

Okay,

guys, that's a wrap.

Ron's got the checks. Thanks for everything.

Billy, why don't you stick with the mix? I'll pay off the talent and meet you

back at the office.

No problem.

Good job.

This is your first time out in a recording session?

I'm impressed.

Now, don't tell me that you really liked that jingle.

Yeah, it was kind of nice.

I hate it.

I think that if I have to write one more of those rinky -dink commercials, they

will send me off to Bellevue as a raving madman.

Then why do you do it?

That's a good question.

I think I do it for the money.

Yeah, that's it. I do it for the money.

Now, what's it going to be? French, Greek, what?

I beg your pardon?

Dinner.

Oh, now you're not going to play hard to get, are you?

Yep.

You slut!

I stick up for you with Paul, and what do you do? You whore! No, you don't

understand, Jason! I did it to help the family! You liar!

You're nothing! You know nothing about us! You're nothing but trouble, mean

trouble! And I intend on beating that meanest out of you, you hear?

No, Jason! No!

Okay, kids. Very good. Just a few notes.

Eddie, try slapping her on the upstage side. You're blocking her, particularly

in the first slap.

And Joan, instead of entering from stage right, come from the bedroom.

The audience will think you've been at Sally's and want to keep them in

suspense.

There we were. Now, I'm going crazy, right? We got 24 hours to do two spots.

Now, I got the baby oatmeal commercial in one room.

And then the other, they're singing their hearts out for disposable douches.

It's complete chaos. Anyway, we get the thing done, the optical tracks are made,

and then we get the whole thing to the lab and it's put on film, okay?

Now comes the big day for the screening for the baby food people.

Disaster. Somehow they got the tracks mixed up, and so you see this little two

-year -old wolfing down oatmeal while the Santa Anita singers are chanting the

advantages of feminine hygiene.

I didn't know if the client ever knew the difference.

Probably not, as long as you brought the project in on budget.

And what did you do before you got into the commercial game?

Nothing important, this and that.

Thanks very much for dinner. I really enjoyed it.

Now, this isn't goodbye, is it?

I had designs on your body.

You're a draft, aren't you?

Fast as T's car used to park Avenue.

Stop it, Danny!

Now,

last one undressed gets their navel kissed from the inside.

On your mark, get set, shoot!

Ta -da! I lose.

Start kissing.

You're delicious.

I kept your neck.

How did you know?

And another one of these.

Thank you.

Can't believe how good you feel.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Angelo. I'm sorry, I forgot the line.

Cut.

Honey, it's, and Angelo goes out with me.

Do you think you can remember that?

Don't print any of this.

Script.

Sherry, what's wrong?

I just don't feel so good.

You better get it together. I put myself on the line for you.

Okay, let's clear the set.

And Sherry.

Try to put a little life into it. This isn't Revenge of the Zombies.

So, how's the happy hooker?

X. Oh, what do we call it now?

Well, what are you driving at?

I don't know.

Except that I think you've got some potential assets for the company.

You know, Billy, getting clients is not an easy task.

You've got to win them over.

Woo them, so to speak.

Now,

the town is sometimes sufficient.

Sometimes a bride, or something simpler, a woman.

Not interested.

Oh, yes, you are.

That is, of course, if you are genuinely interested in remaining in our employ.

Billy, Billy, it's a simple proposition.

You take care of the clients, and we take care of you.

Now, of course, we don't expect you to do it for nothing. Let's say...

200 per. That's the going rate, isn't it?

Think about it.

Oh, yeah, bitch. Come on. Eat that hard cock.

All I'm going to do to you is break your

face. Yeah, come on. Her face, Sal. Rub it in.

Make her eat it.

Open it.

Why?

Eat it.

Come on. Swallow it.

Swallow it, Lord.

She doesn't even know what she's doing. Jesus.

What's it next? You want to take it?

Hey, I know what I got to do. I got to take a wicked piss, man.

I just want to take this.

My body lies over

the ocean.

My body lies over the...

Any bottle. What are you going to do, Sal? What the fuck does it look like,

moron? I don't know. Shit.

Get this thing out of the box.

Shut up, you nut.

Come on,

you guys help me hold the fucking leg. Come on. After you get that in there,

let's try with a tire iron, huh?

I mean it. I should cut it out. Hey, fuck you.

Listen, asshole. I said leave her alone.

Did they hurt you, pussy?

Did they hurt you, pussy? Did they hurt you, pretty pussy?

Did they hurt you with a bottle?

When they were fucking you, did they hurt you?

Let me take a look at you.

I stuck the bottle in there.

Did that hurt you? Did that hurt you with the bottle?

When they jumped in?

Did that hurt you with the bottle?

Let me see.

Let me see. It looks all right.

Looks pretty.

Looks like it didn't hurt you. You'll be okay.

I'm going to take care of you now.

You're going to be okay.

You're going to be okay.

Stole all of your pretty tits.

I'm sorry.

Shouldn't have let him.

Shouldn't have let him all fuck you.

Shouldn't have let him all fuck the shit out of you.

And piss on you.

And shove things in your pussy.

to be just mine.

I'll produce my own play. I'll star in a musical.

I'm singing in the rain. Just singing in the rain. What tomorrow brings.

Do I look like a liar?

Wait a minute. I'll have to get out my glasses for this one.

Okay, four eyes.

Ciao. Ciao.

I've been

waiting

an hour.

I don't know. I think we should call it off.

No, really, Mark, I don't need another woman. I don't need anyone.

I think she said, listen, I'll call you in the morning.

Yeah, coming.

Okay, okay.

One second.

You must be Dick.

Yeah, I am. I'm Billy.

Mark didn't tell me I'd be going out with such a handsome man.

Oh, thank you. Can I come in?

Yeah, please do.

You look pretty yourself.

Can... Can I make you a drink?

Oh, sit down, relax. I'll fix the drink.

Oh, Johnny Walker Red.

I love a man with good taste.

Oh, Tommy Dick.

Where are you from?

I'm from Evanston, Illinois, south side of Chicago.

Sure, I know the place.

You do? Oh, God.

My feet are killing me.

Relief. Well, here's to fun and games.

To fun and games.

So, um, do you do this often?

No.

Only with men I really admire, like you.

You know...

I was wondering, maybe we really shouldn't do this, you know?

Baby,

you're just so tense.

With the strong shoulders.

Are you strong like that, Oliver?

We've got all night, darling.

I didn't expect anyone like you.

You're just so beautiful.

Lie down.

Make you real happy.

Up.

Come on, up you go.

Line up.

Come on, you've got to help me.

You've got to help me.

That's a good boy.

Look at this.

So nice and hard.

This is one of the biggest ones I've ever seen.

I'm going to touch it.

Play with it.

Oh, wait. Wait, stop, stop, stop. Stop, stop.

No, no, no, stop.

Oh, God.

Hold the hook. Wait a second.

Oh, I didn't mean to do that so fast.

Oh, damn it.

I can do it. I really can do it, you know.

It's just that this is the first time I've ever been with, you know. With

another woman.

With another woman.

You see, my wife, I'm okay, you know.

She's very happy. I never let her down.

Don't worry.

Don't worry, Dick. This happens to a lot of men.

We'll start all over again.

You know what they say, it's better the second time around.

I don't know if I can.

Yes, you can.

Oh,

Jesus.

Oh, God.

Jesus, that feels good.

You really are gorgeous.

What are you going to do now?

You'll see.

Just relax.

All right.

Oh, shit.

This is incredible.

I told you you'd like it.

I told you you could do it.

I'm gonna... I'm gonna...

Thank you.

Can I get a kiss?

Oh, wait, wait.

Can I, where can I see you are?

I put a pinch of anchovy paste.

And two, not one, egg yolk.

And the juice from two lemons.

And the olive oil.

And I should start.

Super boy.

So rapimo.

And I say, put the lettuce on top.

Mix well.

And voila!

Caesar salad.

One more time.

Oh, it tastes as good as it sounds.

Eddie, can you really cook? Hey, the smashed potatoes grow on the ground,

That's probably for me.

It's my girlfriend.

Tell her I'm not here.

Yeah. Oh, hi, Ted.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, sure.

Yeah, tomorrow's fine.

Hey, well, you know where I work.

Yeah, I'll see you then.

I love you.

Well, that was Ted.

Prince Charming himself.

What do you want?

You don't be like that. Oh, they're coming by the restaurant tomorrow for

drinks. They've got tickets for a show. They? Yeah, his wife.

Give me a fucking break, wife.

Annie, she's really sweet.

She's my costume instructor.

What'd she teach you how to do? Wear her husband?

Hide the dope. I'll get it, I'll get it.

Anything for you guys?

Yeah, the same, please.

Good cheese.

Yes.

Sherry?

Someone's here to see you.

How'd you find out where I lived?

You gave me your address.

I did?

Sherry, why don't you invite your friend to have dinner with us? Yeah. Oh,

thanks. We got reservations.

You ready to go?

Go where?

Dinner.

Wait a minute, okay?

Um, guys.

Looks like I screwed up.

I've got a date.

A, it looks delicious.

See you guys later, okay?

Okay, have a good time. Okay. Take care. It was great meeting you, whoever you

are. Where are you taking me? Don't worry about it.

Here.

What is it?

I

didn't

really have a date with you.

Huh?

I wanted to see you again.

I knew I didn't tell you earlier.

I followed you home.

Here, take this.

I got something really good for you later on.

What?

To be more comfortable.

Come on. Come on.

Do it.

What

are

you doing?

Just keeping him safe.

Are you nuts?

It's okay. Come on. I feel silly.

Come on, speculate.

I'm here.

It's okay.

Waiter!

What can I do for you?

Ah, yes. The young lady would like a glass of water.

Yes, one glass of water. Thank you very much. Okay.

Hello?

Anybody home?

What time is it?

It's half to four o 'clock.

Have you been asleep all day?

Damn, I missed my job.

Sherry, what happened to your arm?

Oh, my.

Oh, my God.

It must have fallen or something.

On your arm? Bruce was like that?

Sherry, something happened.

Don't worry about it.

I've got to get to work.

Are you going to be okay?

And each sister I dressed in a different gradation of blue, and the rest of the

cast I dressed all in black and white. Oh, darling.

Oh, too bad they didn't know how to wear the costumes right.

But anyway, with Ted's superb direction, they pulled off a decent show, if I do

say so myself.

And we've done enough shows together, Ted, to know what's decent and what

haven't we?

Oh, by the way, Johnny, how's your little show coming along? Oh, fine.

We open on Thursday.

Eddie, I want you to meet my drama teacher and his wife, Arlene and Ted.

doing, Heidi?

He's my co -star.

How you doing? Nice meeting you.

Oh, yeah?

Well, anyway, back to work.

Dirty business call. Oh, speaking of serious theater, guess what we're seeing

tonight?

42nd Street.

Excuse me, I'll be right back.

It was so difficult. We're lucky to get the tickets. It's almost an impossible

show to see.

I've been dying to talk to you alone. I thought he'd never kiss.

Anyway, I'll give you a hint.

This milk, this is not for me. Yes.

For Ted?

No. For the itty -bitty one.

What? I'm pregnant.

After all these years.

And I thought I couldn't have a baby. Oh, I'm ecstatic.

Ted and I tried and tried. You don't know that man. I love him. But sometimes

think he's a sex maniac.

Wait, a sex maniac? Especially if he's passed here. He comes home after his

classes and... Anyway,

I heard the dance is simply spectacular.

Turned everybody on to tap.

Well, you have to excuse me. I've got to get back to work.

Listen, do you have drinks after the show?

No, I don't think that'll be possible.

Goodbye, Ted.

Goodbye. Good luck, Arlene.

He doesn't love me.

He doesn't love me at all.

This should get rid of my tension now.

You know, I'm so nervous about the opening tonight, I could scream.

Don't worry, Jody.

I don't know how to tell you to relax, but you'll do just fine.

What's with her? She's been in there all day.

Yeah, I know.

Did you see the bruises on her? Yeah, and I don't like it.

And if that's Ted, I'm not speaking to him. He and I are through.

Don't worry.

I hope it's Jim.

Hello?

Hold on, I'll see.

Sherry? Sherry?

What? Sherry, are you home? It's Joel.

Oh.

She's not here.

No, I don't know when she'll be back.

Has that guy got you into some kind of trouble?

No, I just don't want to see him. I don't like him.

What's bothering you? Nothing's bothering me. Come on, Sherry, we know

Look, you've been in bed all day. You missed work three times last week. You

come home bombed out on whatever it is you get high on. Something has to be

wrong. Lay off my fucking life, okay?

Kick this up and it won't be. You'll burn yourself out like a cinder if

doesn't kick your brains in first. I don't care.

I want to have fun. I want to party.

I don't care if I don't have to be 30.

Oh, listen, you act like you care. You don't give a shit.

Nobody does.

Look, Billy, I'm not coming down on you.

I'd like to fuck up, okay?

You get the rent on time.

Just worry about that.

Okay.

Come on, Joan. Get ready. It's six o 'clock.

Did you mean they wouldn't let you in carrying a shoulder bag? My dear, they

were full prevention.

Wait a minute. But they don't put their babies in a suit.

Yes, they do.

Can I borrow your Brussels sprouts?

Now he's an anti -trust lawyer in Washington.

He's also got zucchini, cucumbers, and... Meg!

I've got you here!

Where have you been?

Oh, God, I didn't have the ball to thank you.

How did it go? Oh, I think your play works, Meg.

Congratulations.

It went great.

Terrific. Really?

What did you really think?

To tell you the truth, at first I was a little scared.

But you surprised me.

Terrific. You mean it? We both enjoyed it. I just adored the play.

Except I thought the second act was just a little slow.

Hey, Andy!

Oh,

Joan, you were wonderful.

Except for that third act. Sweet chick, that'll work. Oh, Eddie, I'm proud of

you.

Guys, I want you to meet Brett, okay?

Brett Parsons, come here.

How are you doing, Mr. Brett Parsons? Joe, this is Brett Parsons. He's an

Meg, you yellow son of a bitch, get over here.

I think you both did a fine job. Thank you.

Not at all. You have talent.

Look, let me level with you. I'm interested in you both.

Now, I can't make any rash promises, but I'd like to represent you.

As an agent? Well, of course, Eddie.

Why don't you call my office and we'll set up an appointment?

Hey, Brett, come here. I want you to meet Meg.

I just heard it from the Soho News.

They loved it!

Okay,

bye -bye. See you tomorrow.

Bye -bye.

We did it. We did it.

We got it. We got it.

Hey.

Are you sure?

I think so.

Oh, please.

I want you so much.

Thank you.

Okay, let's see if we can shoot this turkey.

Roll found.

See? Roll camera.

Rolling. Pussy treats, take one.

Action. Come on, kitty.

That's a good kitty.

That's a... Eat it.

Eat it.

Eat it.

That's it. Come on.

Cat.

Come on.

Give him a poke.

How would you like to be a nice rug?

Cut!

Come on, kitty.

Cut! Look, we're shooting now.

That cat you sent this morning is a dud.

D -U -D.

No, I'm not interested in his frisky credits.

What did you feed that thing this morning, a cow?

No, no, no, no, no.

Come on, kid.

Cut.

Okay.

Come on. No.

Okay, right.

Where have you been? How come you haven't been returning my calls?

I haven't had the time.

As it is, we're one day over schedule on this shoot. Well, make time.

I've got an important job for you. I think you'll like this one. It pays a

grant. What do I have to do? Fuck the Boston Symphony?

No such luck, Billy.

Just some kid getting married. A little bachelor party thing.

Old American institution.

Uh -huh.

One -on -one is bad enough, but bachelor parties are the worst.

Forget it.

Okay, it's forgotten.

Just stop up at accounting and pick up your last paycheck.

Marv, you wouldn't. Okay.

Right. Hey, action.

You know you're a fucking prick.

Of course I know.

And because you've always been such a royal pain in the ass, Billy, I think

owe me a favor.

Guess what I want.

A lifetime membership to Club Med.

You suck.

Okay, action.

That's a kitty.

Nice. Let's hear it for Mr. Cat.

Huh?

Let's see if you...

Remember how to operate a $100 blowjob.

You're a pig.

Come on, Billy.

That's it.

Yeah, take it in your mouth. That's it. Yeah.

Ooh, easy now. No teeth.

No teeth.

It's too late.

Fucking shoes.

Your fucking shoes.

Hello?

Anybody home?

What are you doing here?

I missed you, baby.

How'd you get in?

I just wanted to see you.

Can I see you sometimes?

I love you, sweetheart.

I just want to be able to see you.

Look, I got something for you.

A bunch of presents.

You can have it all.

Joe, I'm trying to stand.

I'm in a lot of trouble.

I can't take these.

Yes, sweetheart?

Where are you, baby?

I know you're in here.

Come on up.

It's okay.

It's okay, baby.

Well, I guess, I guess you're not in here.

Couldn't be in this room.

Guess I'll go home now.

Had some really nice things for my little sherry.

Too bad.

animal. Take a break already.

You've got the nicest tits I've seen in a long time. They're hot, willing and

able, but not for you.

Take a peek.

Nice enough.

Hey guys, I've got another joke.

It's really good, right? They're good. Okay, there's this French Foreign Legion

commander and he's just in from Paris on his inspection from Algeria, right?

And he says to the sergeant, where do you guys get some action around here?

And the sergeant says, well, we've got our camel here, Bertha.

And the commander says, Bertha, well, okay, I'll give it a try. So he gets a

stepladder and he climbs up and he plugs old Bertha real good, right?

And then he climbs down and he says to the sergeant, sergeant, is this what you

guys do? You dork Bertha every night? The sergeant looks at him like he's

and he says, no, we get on and we ride her to town. There are plenty of broads

there.

Almost funny, almost.

Not quite, you know what I mean?

So when's the lucky guy going to get here? Oh, don't worry. We've got all

I've got something for you.

What do you want me to do?

Salute it?

What a card.

Hey, Jim, it's about time.

Things are really getting hot around here. Jimmy, you've got to meet Billy.

Nice meeting you, Jim. Oh, she's a laugh riot.

I'm so shy, Jim. She's not.

So you're tying the knot.

Why so heavy?

Come on, I'm ready to spill a load.

You want to fuck?

Let's fuck.

Let me see what kind of a man you are.

Show me that puny dick.

Hey, what did I do?

Shut up and give it to me.

All right.

You want to fuck?

Well, here it comes.

Thank you.

Who did this?

Joe. Joe.

Oh, my God.

Joe.

Call an ambulance.

Don't block the label, honey.

Okay. A little slower.

Then, Joel.

Catch the light.

Spread your fingers.

Come on, he speaks for himself. Three Cleos. What more do you want?

Excuse me, Mark. Can I talk to you for a minute?

Hey, guys, I'd like you to meet Billy. She's one of our greatest assets.

Nice meeting you. A little slower. Just give me a second. Will you tell us three

to nine? Sure.

Let me see what I can arrange.

What's on your mind, sweetheart?

You owe me some money.

Oh, yeah.

Right.

You want to?

Good. The service is rented.

Mom, this is only $200.

Oh, yes. I did promise you more, didn't I?

$1 ,000.

And you promised me a half -decent job.

Those guys the other night were very, very disappointed.

That made me look bad, and I don't like that. Take the deuce.

Oh, and for tonight, I want you to take care of these two.

Because you're such a smart -ass broad, you can do them both for a hundred

-dollar bill.

I'm not doing it.

How are you going to do it, honey? Are you going to shape up or get the fuck

out? Is that it?

You got it.

You motherfucker!

Have you ever...

We're well together.

You're just taking it a step at a time, though. Who knows?

How's she doing?

Much better.

I think it'll do her a lot of good to get back with her mom.

So, how's the Broadway star?

It's not Broadway.

Summer Stock.

Can you believe it? I'm playing Blanche.

At least it's one page.

I'm ready.

Well, you cleaned your drawers.

Got your ticket?

And you're all packed.

I'm going to miss you both.

You take care, too.

Keep in touch. I want a postcard from every star.

You, too. Promise.

Yes, it is.

Oh, the ad.

Yes, I still have the two rooms available.

Mm -hmm. They're both quite nice.

You'll have access to the living room and full kitchen.

And there's lots of light.

Do you like plants?