Original subtitles

You're making it hard to say goodbye.

And really, baby, why?

You were so easy to me, not so good, you know.

You made me breakfast.

Do you want a tip before I go?

What made you think that I would stay, shouldn't stand in my way?

Monday morning dancing, buddy, I got a call.

If you'd like to remember me in your way.

Welcome aboard.

Mr. Johnson here will show you to your cabin. Give you a chance to get your sea

legs.

Oh, I'm so happy we chose this place for a honeymoon and not... Niagara Falls or

the Poconos or any place like that. Oh, I'm glad, I'm glad, I'm glad.

Hey, you can't stay there all day.

Who says?

You know, I think you are going to grow up to be a dirty old woman.

You know, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.

I'm hungry. How about lunch?

I'm happy.

God, I'm happy.

You know, me too.

Let's get lunch. Hey, but what about the others? Oh, who cares?

It was weird, wasn't it?

Oh, yeah.

I don't think I'd ever see anything like that.

Me neither.

I mean, there she was, as big as day.

As big as day.

Hey, hey.

You know, I don't... I don't think I should be talking about it. I think she

excited you.

No, I don't know. It isn't that. Oh, it isn't that. You're sitting here

daydreaming about it.

Honey, I'm not even thinking of her greasing herself down.

Greasing herself down?

Tell me, Mr. Hypes. I couldn't even pull you away from it. You loved it, didn't

you? No, I didn't.

I think you're horrible.

Janet.

Get away from me.

Come on, honey. Get away from me. Don't honey me. Get away.

Never give liquor to a bride.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Bill, I want you. Not now, love. Not tonight.

Please, Bill.

What's the matter?

Not now.

Oh, please.

Bill?

What's the matter? Honey, I can't. You can't? It's our honeymoon. I cried

to sleep last night. You have to tell me. Please, honey, leave me alone.

Just for a while.

That's the way you feel about it.

Here I come, everybody!

Good morning, Captain.

Good morning, Mrs. Linton.

Did you sleep well last night?

Yes, thank you. Very well.

Hey, Bill, aren't you coming in? The water is great.

He can't swim.

What got into her?

I don't know. I didn't.

How does that woman know you can't do this?

I know how she knows I can't swim. Maybe she overheard it somewhere. Maybe you

told her.

All I know is I didn't tell her.

But who did you tell?

Never mind. Forget it.

Oh, I see.

It's perfectly all right for you to accuse me of playing footsie with

behind your back, but I'm supposed to forget the fact that you've been seeing

someone else.

Forget about it, huh?

Well, I know what you said, and I don't like the implication.

Janet.

Look,

honey, I know you're mad.

Honey, we can't go on not talking to each other for the rest of our lives.

I got something I want to tell you.

It may mean the end of both of us, but...

how to tell you.

You don't have to tell me anything.

I do.

Yes, love, I do.

I already know.

You made love with Mrs.

Lawrence last night.

That's what I was going to tell you.

I know.

I saw you again with her today.

Well, I made love with Dorothy Lindsay.

Oh, no.

Oh, my God. My God.

My God.

My God.

I didn't know I could make love with another woman.

It's really very interesting.

I want to die.

This is Scorpio. Everything is on schedule.

Contact Barracuda incomplete.

We board this morning.

Do not attempt, repeat, do not attempt to contact me or Barracuda. I will

personally make contact sometime within the next 48 hours.

This had better go well, pal.

The car will be here in a few minutes.

I forgot to check the weather.

It's been done.

Lane.

Now, we've been married seven years.

We have no children. I'm a banker and we live in Scarsdale.

Remember that?

Sweet, you're shy, you're demure, and you're quiet.

Stay away from that crew, Elaine.

That's about as absurd as asking Mae West to play a drummer boy.

You're being paid well enough so that nothing is absurd.

Trust me.

Trust you?

All this intrigue.

Fisherman Barracuda.

Operation Scorpio 70.

Trust you.

Have you ever heard the story of the scorpion and the frog?

This scorpion wanted to get across the pond on this frog's back.

Well, the frog says, no, you're going to sting me.

But the scorpion, he persuades him. He says, why would I sting you? You die and

I drown.

So the frog said, okay, get on.

Halfway across the pond, the scorpion stings him.

And the frog looks at him and says, why did you do that? Now we'll both die.

Scorpion said, because it's in my nature.

That's right.

Fix your hair, Elaine.

all the time.

Cool it, baby. I finally remember your respect.

Captain, I'm going Lawrence.

Lawrence, this is Captain Lane. Mr. Lawrence, this is Lawrence.

Glad to have you aboard.

Go on, ship you out there, Captain.

Can I trust the accommodations?

Private, Mr.

Lawrence. Good. Very private.

Private will show you to your accommodations.

Well, didn't you read the brochure?

Days full of sun and fun.

Well, I intend getting my share of both.

Forget it, baby. Private property.

Well, even private property gets a vague once in a while.

Well, I wouldn't mind that.

That deckhand out there.

It's a muscle, man. Not.

Surveyor. So forget it.

That seems to be your favorite phrase lately.

Forget you're my secretary.

Forget where we've been.

Forget who you see me doing business with. Forget this. Forget that.

Forget everything.

Oh, not everything.

I sure wouldn't want you to forget how well...

I'd pay you for those blanks in your memory.

And I sure wouldn't want you to forget how to ball.

One of these days, I may just forget both those days, too.

Oh, hey, Lance.

What are we at each other's throats for, huh?

I want to talk to you, okay?

I want you to listen to me, okay?

Because I'm only going to say it.

I was only kidding. I know a good thing when I have it. Honest, Glenn.

Honest, I won't open my mouth.

Just in case, baby, you ever forget.

Are you proud of those?

Proud of those?

One little tiny word.

You won't know.

You're back.

From your front.

Get out of here.

Wiggle your ass at that muscle man.

Don't you let him get too close.

One other thing.

Stay away from that spade.

You start getting hot pants for dark skin.

You lay up under the sun.

And that's about it.

After I retired from the Navy, I found that I just couldn't live without the

sea. So I got this old tub and went into the vacation cruise business.

Perhaps you'd be interested in a tour of the ship.

Oh, I'd love to. Mrs. Lindsay?

All right, thank you.

Lane, honey?

I'd just as soon go up and get some sun.

That incident wouldn't insult you, Captain.

Of course not.

Okay, honey.

But don't get burned.

I never do.

Mr. Lindsay?

I don't think he'd go anywhere, Captain.

Won't do you any good, baby.

I've got a lot of work to do right now.

Why don't you just be a good little girl and hop into bed?

I don't need it, Glenn.

You can't just turn me off at night.

I've been a good girl all day.

Well, now, it just doesn't take too much imagination.

To figure out just how good a girl you really were while I was out casing that

shit, huh?

Now, I could never prove it.

And that is very fortunate for you.

But, on the other hand, I just gotta figure that you found somebody to

your needs.

Do you know who I found?

Me.

Honest.

That robotic part up there on deck.

Just thinking about him.

Oh, you'll live through the night.

And I promise you that if everything goes well, you and I will be living in a

villa somewhere in South America.

And, baby, you and I will have nothing to do but make it all day long.

I don't care what happens when we get off this ship.

I want it now.

You are getting buggy, baby.

Well, if I can't get it here, I know where I can.

That's right.

That's right. Go and get some cool night air and cool off whatever it is that's

bothering you, okay?

For your information, I'm going out to find that deckhand.

The black one.

Even you are that stupid.

Would you like to go for a moonlight swim?

Oh, hi.

No, I'm afraid swimming is the last thing in the world I've been thinking of

doing now.

Oh, that's a pity.

Because I thought that we could get wet.

I'm afraid you'd have to pay me if we did.

I can't swim a stroke.

Stroke.

Do you have a fight?

I mean, it's none of my business, but you being on your honeymoon and all, I

thought you might want to talk about it.

I mean, your wife is real cute.

And she's sweet and pure and all the

things a wife is supposed to be.

I was like that once.

All alive with the hopes and dreams for the future.

Marriage, a husband, a little cottage

with a great big mortgage.

But then I realized that marriage only meant legality to me.

And a little cottage was only a lot of useless space surrounding

a bedroom.

And a husband was someone I'd screw to death within six months.

You make yourself seem worse than you really are.

I'm sure.

Oh, don't kid yourself, honey.

I know what I am, and I'm honest about it.

Why do you think I came down here?

Do you think maybe I need some polite conversation at 2 a .m.?

I don't even care that

I met you today for the first time.

Or that you're a complete stranger.

Or that you have a pretty new wife on board.

All I care about is that you're a man.

Someone.

You're someone to have sex with.

Thank you.

I came by to see how your wife was feeling.

She seemed a little upset before.

What the hell are you doing here? Haven't you caused enough trouble

If my wife sees you with me, she'll put two and two together.

She isn't here. No, I don't know where she is.

Disappointed.

You've got me wrong again.

Honest.

I thought that if I...

Came by like a concerned neighbor inquiring about her condition.

Why, she'd have to figure that I wouldn't show my face unless everything

perfectly in.

You're a real pro, aren't you?

Well, what's that supposed to mean?

I mean, after all the married men you must have humped, I bet you know every

cover up in the book.

Listen, Sir Gellar. No, I don't know why I ever let you do that to me.

Me do it to you.

Listen, you son of a bitch.

You've got your me's and you's mixed up a little, don't you? Oh, come on. Now

the maligned woman doesn't look good on you. Who are you kidding?

I raped you, right?

You sure didn't push me away.

And I didn't hold you back either.

Look, let's face it like it is. Who was doing the shopping last night?

But who did the buying? You caught me at a weak moment and don't exactly buy

used goods.

None. that used anyway.

Well, let's see if this is one of your stronger... Please, but I don't want to

get out of here.

Come on, Bill.

Please, it's my life.

What have you done to them?

She did it with anger.

I liked it.

What are they?

Take your heart and drive.

People are dying every day from this junk.

If I get a chance, I'm going to kill them.

Just don't start that again. Just don't start. All right.

Well, well, well. Another happy family like ours. I wouldn't have believed it.

Hey, don't let me interrupt you, Captain. Go right ahead. It does my

to see someone else with family troubles.

You know, Miffy likes company and all that.

There's no reason to be embarrassed.

We've been through it all ourselves.

As a matter of fact, we still are.

Pete Lindsey here.

Welcome aboard.

Sorry that you had to hear that.

Don't apologize to her, Captain.

Anything short of a hundred Girl Scouts singing on the good ship Lollipop would

have been a disappointment to her.

Particularly the hundred Girl Scouts.

Why do you have to say that?

Well, we might as well not have any secrets, sweetheart.

You know, a boat like this can get mighty small after a few days at sea.

You know what I mean, Captain?

And a few days at sea can solve all the world problems, too.

Sure, everything will turn out all right. Well, I hope you know more about

running this boat than you do about people.

Otherwise, we're all going to be in a lot of trouble.

Hey, which way are the bridal chambers?

Four bells and all's well.

I can hardly wait for eight bells.

What are you looking for, mermaids?

Hey, that's a great title for a children's story.

A mermaid in the dike.

Let's see how it goes.

There's this mean mermaid, see, and she's frustrated and bitchy.

So she decides to command the oceans to flood over the continents.

But then this dike comes to the rescue.

Oh, she knows what's troubling the mermaid.

So you know what she does?

Hey, it's a twist, another of the kids' stories.

Another one, I mean.

Only in this one, the dike puts her finger in the gizmo.

Stop it, God damn it. Now stop it.

All right.

All right.

Day in, day out, every chance you get.

Go on that way.

But it was you who drove me.

You and that freaking drunken mind of yours.

Maybe.

But I always looked at it another way.

Your coldness and frigidity.

Do we have to go through that again?

It wasn't coldness, and it wasn't frigidity.

I was young and inexperienced, and I came from that god -awful Puritan home

of mine.

I was frightened.

And all I needed was a little patience and understanding.

Patience?

A man runs out of patience after the weeks become months and the months

years. Now, young or old, you were my wife, Dorothy.

And what should have been beautiful instead became ugly.

Patience.

You ran out of patience the first night, Pete.

But this can be a different kind of a first night.

It'll work out.

I know it'll work out.

It's over.

When are you going to learn it's over?

Every year you book us on one of these honeymoon trips, hoping that some night,

when the moon is bright and the atmosphere is dripping with romance,

Irresistible magical overtaker.

It's over.

It's over.

The captain will be announcing lunch soon.

You want to come, Pete?

I'm sorry, Pete.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I wish I were that bright, shiny...

Don't you think you've had enough for one day?

You'll never know.

What's that supposed to mean?

Nothing, nothing at all.

I suppose no one else on this ship will ever know either.

Could be, could be.

Pete, one thing.

Spare me the embarrassment of having to explain your states of unconsciousness.

See, I told you you'd never know.

I've got news for you, my dear. I wasn't asleep.

Pardon me, unconscious.

And I'm glad I wasn't.

I was merely in a state of embryonic psychotosis, my dear, on the very brink

cosmic... Hey,

you know, come to think of it, you would have enjoyed what I saw even more than

me. You really would have climbed the walls.

You know, just because I love you so much, I'm going to let you in on an

tip. Now forget the captain's daughter.

The other brought that phony Mrs. Lawrence. Now, she's the one. You'll

ball with her.

Yes, sirree. That little lady has the hottest pants I've ever seen.

She wanted to take me on all hands.

Came that close. Almost made it, but they copped out.

Pete, it won't do you any good.

There's an old law.

Honeymooners aren't supposed to be depressed.

I'm sorry.

I guess I should keep my troubles to myself.

Because of last night?

No, it's not that. It's... Yes.

Yes, it is.

Listen, I'm not much of a preacher, but I could tell you a story.

I think it was my second crude. I had a friend. She was a really smart girl,

Jan, and talented.

And I learned a lot about myself.

Well, I've been a lady who thought that marriage was a duty and a sex a chore.

I'm still not the lady who does her own thing naturally, Jan.

But each time I do something that feels natural.

I wonder more and more.

Know it? I just know it. I know he's dead. No, we don't know that at all.

I know it.

I do. When he left the cabin last night, he said he wanted to die.

Oh, he didn't mean that. It was just a quarrel.

Jonathan. Yes, Captain? You seen that daughter of mine?

No, Captain, I haven't.

Christina!

Christina!

Barracuda. Barracuda. This is the fisherman.

Come in.

Hey, fisherman.

How are you? We've been waiting to hear from you. Everything okay?

Everything okay. We're right on the nose.

Now listen.

There.

It's all ready for us to sign the pact.

The one making us equal partners.

Equal partners.

$750 ,000.

Does he probably know you, darling?

Not yet.

Well, how would you like it if I called him?

What are you doing here?

How do you think he'd like it if I told him what you were doing here?

Let's see.

What was it the Barracuda said they'd row with to the ship tonight?

Heroin, wasn't it?

A lot of heroin.

A million and a half dollars worth.

That's right, I remember now.

A million and a half dollars worth of heroin.

That's a lot of money.

Even after you're divided by two.

What is your name?

Christina.

You can't kill me.

The fact of the matter is you can't do a thing to me until after the delivery

tonight. You can't afford any trouble aboard this ship.

And after?

Don't worry about when the time comes.

And now it's time to sign our pact.

I always like to mix a little pleasure with business.

Besides, I've never made a business partner before.

Tax -free.

Well, I certainly hope you enjoy it, sweetheart.

Because it is likely to be your last time up to bat.

Well, that about wraps it up, I'd say.

From the evidence you've given me, it's a pure case of suicide.

If I need any further statements from you in the future, I'll get in touch

you.

I'm sorry that we had to meet under such terrible circumstances.

Lieutenant, there's one other thing before you leave.

How would you like to know where there's a million and a half dollars worth of

heroin stored aboard this ship? Pete, you're making a fool of yourself.

Lieutenant, he's just drunk.

I'm drunk, all right, but I happen to be aware of every word I'm saying. Oh,

Pete. Look down in Johnson's quarters.

I Found that hidden under his boat sir

That's

heroin all right Look don't try to pin that on me. I don't know how that yeah

None of you spades ever knows anything about crime or narcotics. Do you that

gives me a laugh?

I find your law -abiding outlook a little strange, Mr. Lawrence, seeing

put that suitcase under Johnson's bunk.

Now you are drunk, I see.

Am I?

Lieutenant, my name's Glenn Lawrence. I'm a respectable businessman who run a

DMV army.

Exactly, Lieutenant.

He's a respectable businessman. Well, he's a businessman anyway.

Now, today, when the captain told us that...

We were going to meet you here. I noticed Lawrence sneaking away from the

Well, I followed him. Now, he went to his cabin, he got that suitcase, and he

took it to Johnson's quarters.

Now, why would I do a thing like that?

Well, not being a respectable businessman, I really don't know.

But I'd say you expected to pick up that suitcase before you left the ship. But

just in case it was found, it'd be found in Johnson's quarters.

Am I close?

This is ridiculous.

Where would I even get that much heroin? Would I do go fishing for it?

Well, I know the answer to that, too.

You seem to know a hell of a lot for a drunken bum.

You know, that may be the only advantage to having a home life you can't stand.

You spend a lot of nights out of doors just... I don't have to listen to this

crap anymore.

I'd like to hear what he has to say, Mr. Lawrence.

Well, last night, Lieutenant, a small boat met this ship.

Hey, get out of here. Move. Fast.

A million and a half dollars and a half of it in wine.

You take a real good look, sweetheart.

That's likely to be the last time you'll ever see it.

This business, appearance, nothing against you.

Just can't afford expensive art.

I'll never get away with it.

People fall overboard all the time, even people who know boats.

Sorry, partner. Hey.

Bill?

Hey, Bill.

Come here. Come on.

Take a look at this.

He's too mad at the way I'm safe. Two people overboard you can't get away

Besides, he knows too much now.

No, no.

No, no.

We're on free on this one.

He can't swim.

I just saw you push that poor boy overboard just now.

Now, where do we store the goods, partner, in your place or mine?

You know, you're a bitch.

A rich bitch.

Are you willing to testify to that, Mr. Lindsey?

To that and one other thing, Lieutenant.

The murder of young Hyken by the same two.

You're making it hard to say goodbye.

And really, baby, why?

You were so easy to me, not good to know.

You made me breakfast.

Do you want a tip before I go?

What made you think that I would stay? Shouldn't stand in my way.

This Monday morning, there's somebody I gotta call.

If you thought this was love, then I think last night you slept through it

I can't believe the way you're going on.

Wish that I were gone.

Think you've seen too many movies, finally do it.

I'm glad you say you're going to spend tomorrow feeling blue and

meditating this affair and keeping still.