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- [Woman] Let me die.

Let me die.

(Tense, dramatic music)

(Tense music)

- [Jan] I've lost his pulse.

- Time of death: 3 P.M.

- You did everything you could.

- [Bill] Everything in the books.

- I beg your pardon?

- You heard me. - Bill, really.

Now is not the time.

- I've kept my mouth shut long enough.

How many deaths will it take before we try things my way?

- The operating room is no place for your experiments.

- Why not?

I can't do him any harm.

- Nor can you do him any good.

- That's where you're wrong.

I can save him, I know I can.

- He's dead.

- Then what have you got to lose?

Even if there's a one in a million chance,

don't you owe that to him?

To his family.

He has kids, you know.

- Bill!

- What if it were me on this table?

How soon would you give up then?

- How dare you prey on my emotions at a time like this.

- Emotions be damned,

I'm trying to save a life!

- Very well.

The corpse is yours.

Do what you will.

(Tense music)

- All right.

Get the defibrillator ready.

Scalpel.

Set it to 300 joules and wait for my order.

Here goes nothing.

Steady...

(Blood spraying)

Thank you, Jan.

Steady...

(Blood spraying)

- What on earth are you doing to him?

- I'm saving him, dammit!

Hand me those electrodes.

Now the jumper cables.

Turn on the battery and adjust to 100 milliamps.

Now.

- Clear. (Buzzing)

- Again. - Clear.

(Buzzing)

- Let's hope we're not too late.

- Stop talking like he's still alive.

- He is, look!

- Here.

This should do the trick. (Buzzing)

- Stay away from

his motor functions.

You'll paralyze him.

- What would you rather be? Paralyzed or dead?

- Some decisions are not yours to make.

It's unethical. - To hell with ethics!

You lost your patient, doctor.

I'm going to save mine!

(Buzzing)

- His pulse is coming back stronger than ever.

It's unbelievable.

- Nothing's unbelievable

if you have the nerve to experiment.

- Congratulations son, you've just performed a miracle.

- So you approve?

- Approve? No.

But I can't argue with your results.

- Well it's a start.

Okay.

Let's close this sucker up.

- Bill, you're a fine surgeon. Maybe the best.

But what you did in there was far too risky.

- I saved his life, didn't I?

- Yes, but at what cost?

There's no way to know what the after effects might be.

- You know, father, there's more to being a surgeon

than cutting along a dotted line.

Our bodies are capable of adjusting in ways

we've never imagined.

If only we had the key.

- The key? To what?

- Complete transplantations.

To be able to replace limbs and organs

as easily as we do eye corneas now,

so that the new parts join together as though

they were born there.

Who knows.

One day we may even be able to transplant a brain

into an entirely new body.

- Ha, that can't be done.

- It can be done.

With my new serum, I know it can.

You have to believe me.

- Bill darling, I'm so proud of you, I could kiss you.

- Always promises.

Come here, you.

- Careful. Your father is liable to report us.

- Now, come on you two, save it for the honeymoon.

- I can hardly wait.

- I promise you one thing, your grandchildren won't

be test tube babies.

- She means she's going to-

- no, no, I know, I know what she means.

Bill, listen to me.

The line between genius and madness is a thin one.

I want you to stay on the right side of it.

- You don't have to worry about me.

- Oh, is that so?

Superintendent had it out with me, you know?

He thinks it's you who's been stealing

body parts from the morgue.

- So what if it is?

What? I need them to work with.

That's what you're always saying, isn't it?

Test and experiment.

- Yes, but bill, limbs? Body parts?

It's not right.

- Why is it that those who fear the unknown

insist on demonizing those of us who wish to conquer it?

If it were up to men like you,

we'd still be riding horses to work

and sending messages by carrier pigeon.

- You think you know everything,

but you're skating on thin ice.

God only knows what you're up to,

always sneaking away to the old country house.

The place gives me the creeps.

I knew when your mother died, I should've sold it.

- You can't sell it!

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to shout.

It's just been a lot of stress recently,

what between work and Jan.

- What's wrong with Jan?

- Nothing.

It's just, eh, well ever since we got engaged,

she insists on upholding certain,

shall we say puritanical traditions.

(Laughs) - As well she should.

Anyway, it's only a week until the wedding.

- You don't understand.

All this sexual tension, it's driving me mad.

I feel like I'm about to-

(cork pops)

Darling.

Wonderful.

- The doctors say Mr. Carlton

is going to make a full recovery.

- Who?

- The man whose life you saved.

- Oh yes, of course.

Glad to hear it.

- Maghaz Masala?

- I've never had Masala before.

- I'm told it's a delicacy in subcontinental cuisine.

- Well it smells delicious.

- This particular dish is considered to be an aphrodisiac.

- Is that right?

- So I've heard.

Thank you, Malcolm.

- Maybe we should save some for the wedding night.

- That's one option.

Though I'd imagine goat brains

are probably best served fresh.

(Phone ringing)

- Phone call for you, sir.

Mr. Kurt.

- Excuse me.

This will only take a moment.

Hello?

(Inaudible)

Calm down Kurt and tell me what happened.

I see.

I expected as much.

No matter.

I'll head out first thing in the morning.

And Kurt?

Next time you call while I'm having dinner,

there'd better be a fire.

(Sighs)

- [Jan] Who's Kurt?

- My research assistant.

I'm afraid my presence is needed at the country house.

- But you promised we'd spend the weekend together.

- I know, but something's come up.

- Well then I'm going with you.

- Jan.

- If we're going to be married,

we can't keep secrets from one another.

Now I'm going with you and that's final.

(Bill sighs)

- Very well.

Malcolm will take you come so you can pack a bag.

We leave at dawn.

(Soft orchestral music)

- I'm anxious to see what's kept you

away from me all this time.

- You'll know soon enough.

We're running late.

You don't mind if I hurry, do you?

- By all means.

- Full speed ahead.

(Upbeat jazz music)

- Bill, slow down!

- Relax, I've driven this road a hundred times.

(Meow)

- Look out!

(Tires skid)

(Crashing)

(Birds chirping)

("Under the bamboo tree" plays on radio)

♪ And we like-a both the same ♪

♪ I like-a say this very day, I like-a change your name ♪

♪ 'cause I love-a you and love-a you true ♪

♪ and if you-a love-a me ♪

♪ one live as two, two live as one ♪

♪ under the bamboo tree ♪

(Tense, dramatic music)

(Dramatic music)

- We're here, don't worry.

Everything's going to be all right.

Kurt!

- What's the matter?

- There's been a terrible accident.

I've got to save her. - Her?

What have you got in there?

- There's no time to explain.

Go and prep the lab, we've got to work fast.

- Don't you wanna see what's in the closet?

- This is far too urgent.

Now do as I tell you before it's too late!

- Of course, right away.

(Machines whirring) (Tense music)

- [Bill] Get the camera.

- You mean you actually want to film this?

- We filmed all the others. Why stop now?

- I figured this one, that she was different.

- You figured wrong.

Now get the camera. (Tense music)

- It can't be.

My eyes deceive me.

- What you see is real.

What I've done, I've done,

and what I've done is right.

(Dramatic music)

(Soft, mysterious music)

- Let me die.

Let me die.

- We should do as she asks.

- Don't be a fool.

She's in no condition to make that kind of decision.

- This is no way to live.

- We've been having unprecedented success with transplants.

I can make her whole again, I tell you.

- Only a madman would think that she could

be made back into the person she once was.

(Bill sighs)

She's more than just a brain, you know.

She had a heart and a body as well.

And her soul occupied all three.

- Nonsense.

What you call the soul, I call the mind.

We keep her brain alive, we keep Jan alive.

I love her too much to let her die.

- You say you love her,

yet you're willing to subjugate what's left of her

to scientific torture.

- I am the only man in the world

capable of reviving a human head.

The fact that Jan should lose hers?

No. It can't be coincidence.

My entire life has been leading up to this.

To save her.

Sleep, my darling.

Rest and grow strong.

- How long can she survive in this condition?

- Two days, maybe three.

- You really think you can give her a new body?

You're sure it will work?

That it won't end up...

Like my arm?

(Bill scoffs)

- That was before I perfected the serum.

It will work this time.

It has to.

- What about the accident?

Surely it's only a matter of time

before the police discover it.

- Let them find it.

The car is new, unregistered.

And as for Jan, I doubt they'll be able

to identify her remains without a head.

- Let's hope you're right.

- I am.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have business to attend to.

- Before you go.

Please, take a look in the closet.

It's the reason you came. (Bill sighs)

(Dramatic music)

(Bill grunts)

- Keep it locked.

- [Kurt] What if it tries to escape?

- Through a steel door?

Impossible.

It has neither the strength nor the intelligence.

Now I've got to go and find a body for Jan.

- [Kurt] How do you intend to do that?

- There are ways. There are ways.

- God help us.

(Tense music)

(Jazz music plays nearby)

(Sleazy jazz music)

- Bring me a whiskey, neat, and make it a double.

(Audience applauding)

(People chattering)

(Soft music)

- What took you so long?

- What made you think I'd come?

- You look like the kind of man who knows

a good thing when he sees it.

- Well there's plenty to see.

- Even more to touch.

Fix me a drink.

- With pleasure.

What's your poison?

- Brandy.

(Cat meows)

It's a pain bringing her to work,

but I can't bear the thought of leaving her all alone.

- I know the feeling.

(Tense music)

- Let me die.

Let me die.

(Screams)

(Soft jazz music)

- Are you really a doctor?

- Hmph.

See for yourself.

- Mr. Cortner, md.

Wow. Impressive.

Most men with your looks are all brawn and no brains.

- Say Bonnie, how would you feel about

coming back to my place?

It's not far.

- Your place, huh?

- We can drink champagne and get better acquainted.

- A tempting offer, but, could my pussy come along?

- Well I'd have it no other way.

- You sure got some nerve comin' in here.

- Keep your g string on.

I'm only here to change. - Yeah, right.

- That's some face you got.

All the girls are talking about you.

- They are?

- I suppose no one has ever told you that three is a crowd?

- I couldn't agree more, so why don't you take a hike?

After all, I'm sure our friend here

would much prefer my company.

- Well, he's already invited me back to his house,

so eat your heart out. - Oh yeah?

- Yeah. - Uh, excuse me.

- Where are you going?

- I'm sorry ladies.

I just remembered something urgent.

I have to go.

- Can I see you later? - Yeah, come back later.

I'll remember you.

- That's what I'm afraid of.

Goodbye.

- You lousy tramp.

Once in a blue moon, a guy with class comes along

and you have to mess it up for me.

(Laughs)

- What makes you think you had him?

He wouldn't have you on a bet.

- Says who? - Says me.

What would a guy like that want with leftovers?

(Bonnie gasps)

(Slaps) - Leftovers?!

- Why, you cheap, third rate stripper!

(Woman gasps)

(Women grunting) (Squealing)

- Don't call me a stripper.

- Let me go!

I'll mash you on the butt!

- I'd like to see you try.

- [Paula] Oh, I'll try.

(Women yelling) (Grunting)

- Ah!

You eat it, you eat it!

(Yelling) (Grunting)

- Who are you?

- My name is Kurt.

I'm your fiance's research assistant.

- Bill?

Where is bill?

- He's out at that moment, looking for a,

a way to help you.

- A way to help me?

How?

What has he done to me?

Why can't I move?

- You were in an accident.

- There was a car crash.

- Yes.

You were...

Well, you were decapitated.

- I don't understand.

- It means beheaded. - I know what it means.

How on earth am I still alive?

- You have bill to thank for that.

Are you okay?

- My body.

I can feel it.

I can feel it burning.

- A common symptom of amputation, I'm afraid.

One I've experienced firsthand.

Your brain is falsely perceiving nerve endings

that no longer exist resulting in

an itch that can never be scratched, so to speak.

- The pain, it's, it's unbearable.

- I'll up your morphine intake at once.

- No amount of morphine can end my suffering.

Please, you have to kill me.

- I'm sorry, truly I am,

but that's not my decision to make.

- It's no one's decision but mine.

Now I demand that you let me die.

- I can't. Bill would never allow it.

- Let me speak to him.

He'll listen to me, I know he will.

- Like I said, he's busy at the moment.

- Well, where is he?

(Tense music)

- Repent you whores of Babylon,

for the kingdom of god is at hand.

Repent!

Repent you whores and drug addicts.

Repent you whores of Babylon,

for the kingdom of god is at hand.

Repent.

O' wicked one

or be cast into a lake of fire.

- Your sign's upside down.

- Oh, thank you.

- Hey, handsome.

You lookin' for some head?

- No, it's the rest of you I want.

- Yeah, whatever. (Chuckles)

How about we go somewhere more private?

- How about my place?

- Nah.

Roxanne doesn't make house calls.

Come on.

My apartment's right around the corner.

- [Man] Repent you whores of Babylon,

for the kingdom of god is at hand.

- Here we are. (Chuckles)

You seem a little tense.

You want a drink?

- Sure.

- Vodka okay?

- Yeah, that's fine. (Tense music)

- What's this? A little massage?

- I'm sorry, I have no choice.

(Roxanne choking)

(Hits) (Bill grunts)

(Hits) Oh!

(Bill grunting) (Whimpering)

(Glass shatters) Oh, son of a bitch!

Oh!

(Dramatic music)

Holy shit!

I'm sorry!

(Slicing)

Jesus!

(Dramatic jazz music)

(Gunshots)

I said I was sorry!

- Die, bastard!

(Gunshots)

(Gunshot) (Bill yelps)

(Roxanne yelling)

Don't mess with Roxanne!

(Roxanne grunts) (Gunshots)

- [Bill] What the hell, lady!

(Gunshots) - Die, bastard!

(Bill panting)

(Soft jazz music)

- You look like a man who could use a drink.

- You have no idea.

(Bartender chuckles)

- I remember you.

Whiskey, neat, right?

- Yes. Have we met?

- Eh, sort of.

I remember when you used to come in here

when you were going to med school.

Bill, right?

- Yeah.

- Oh yeah, Mr. Popularity back in those days.

Always had a lady or two chasing after you.

- Still do.

- Lucky man.

- Yes. It's all coming back to me.

(50s doo-wop music)

♪ Dreamin', dreamin' ♪

♪ dreamin' you'll look my way ♪

- Come on, bill, we're gonna be late for chemistry.

- Oh, jeez.

All right, I'm coming.

Sorry, but I gotta go.

- [Women] Aww.

- Ladies.

(Bill belches)

- Lucky man.

- Before we proceed, I cannot stress enough

that when handling volatile chemicals

one must employ the utmost caution.

- Hand me that flask of concentrated

hydrogen peroxide, will you?

- Are you sure it's wise to skip ahead?

The professor said-

- the professor's an old, senile fool.

Besides, I'm about to synthesize a new form of rocket fuel.

- All right, then.

So long as you're sure it's safe.

- It would be far safer if you didn't

insist on distracting...

My god.

She's beautiful.

I have to go.

Hold this, will you?

- Wait, where are you going?

- I'll be right back.

Be sure to add a stabilizer before the

isotopes have a chance to separate.

- Uh, do what now?

- [Bill] Thanks!

- Uh, okay.

(Soft music) (Birds chirping)

- Hi.

- Hi.

(Romantic music)

(Distant explosion)

- Jackass.

- What?

- Jackass.

That's 40 after the double word,

plus 50 for using all seven tiles,

making a grand total of 90 points.

- Not bad for your first turn. - Give up?

- Not on your life.

("What have you done to my heart" playing)

- What's this?

- How about it, Jan?

Will you make me the happiest man on earth?

- Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

♪ What have you done to my heart ♪

(Soft jazz music)

- Damn shame.

Any luck with the head?

- I searched high and low,

and there ain't no head to be found.

I think an animal might have gotten it.

- But it wasn't any animal.

It was a man.

- Who was he?

- The driver, who do you think?

- How do you know the driver was a man?

- Don't you know it's illegal for a woman

to operate a vehicle in the state of Wisconsin?

- I don't think that's true.

And besides, we're not in Wisconsin.

- One thing's for damn sure,

someone didn't want this woman identified.

They were close.

He knew we'd come for him.

(Officer gasps)

- I bet you he's a communist.

Those people are scum.

- Now you're thinking like a cop.

- Thanks.

(Insects buzzing)

(Tense music)

- It's not fair.

(High pitch noise) (Gasps)

(High pitch noise)

You.

Behind that door, what has he done to you?

I know you're in there.

Knock once if you can hear me.

(Bangs)

Then I'm not the first,

knock twice if I'm not the first.

(Bangs twice)

Hello.

Kurt, was it?

- Yes.

Who are you talking to?

- My fellow prisoner.

Isn't that right?

(Bangs)

Tell me, Kurt.

What lies behind that door?

- Behind that door is the sum total of bill's mistakes.

A horror far beyond your own.

- So that's what he's been doing here all this time,

experimenting on that thing?

- Yes.

And on me.

Tearing away my flesh time after time,

test after test, my hopes shattering

with each subsequent graft,

watching as it would wither and warp.

- And yet you stayed with him all this time.

Why?

- What choice have I?

There's no place for me out there.

Eyes would look upon me with pity.

People would turn their heads in disgust.

No.

The drunk has his bottle, the dope addict his needle.

I have my research.

- You're a fool if you can't see that he's using you.

- I know.

But he's my only hope.

A surgeon needs both arms to operate, not just one.

I live only for the day he can work

a successful transplant.

That is why I stay.

- He intends to do the same with me, doesn't he?

To transplant my head onto a new body.

- Yes.

- And why should my fate be any different than yours?

- Bill believes he's finally perfected the serum.

And I have no reason to doubt him.

Look what it's already done for you.

- You have no idea what it's done.

This liquid being pumped through what's left of me,

my brain burns with it.

Just like that poor creature locked behind that door.

It's given me power.

- Power?

What power?

Can't you see you're at the mercy

of every element in the universe?

How can you speak of power?

- That thing and I are in touch.

I can feel it, speak to it.

Control it.

- Preposterous.

- Want me to prove it to you?

- You could prove nothing.

You're powerless.

- I'll show you how powerless I am.

(High pitch noise)

♪ If you like-a me like I like-a you ♪

♪ and we like-a both the same ♪

♪ I like-a say this very day, ♪

♪ I like-a change your name ♪

[The thing] ♪ 'cause I love-a you and love-a you true ♪

♪ and if you-a love-a me ♪

[Duet] ♪ one live as two, two live as one ♪

♪ under a bamboo tree ♪

I'm only a head and you're...

Whatever you are.

But together we're strong.

More powerful than any of them.

(Maniacal laughing) (Tense music)

- What are you running from?

What's the matter with... Something's gone wrong

something beyond our control.

- There's nothing beyond my control.

Jan's alive and I'll keep her that way

until I've found her the perfect body.

- You haven't found a body?

- Well, I've got to be careful.

I can't be the last person seen with a girl

before she disappears.

- Then how will you do it?

- Here, I rented a car. (Keys clatters)

Head to the red light district

and find me a suitable candidate.

Offer a handsome sum on the condition that they return here.

- Why do I have to go?

- Because I can't risk having her see me.

- Her?

- Forget it. It's not important.

Now get going.

- If I may, it's been years since I've driven a car and,

I'm just not... for the love of god, Kurt.

Don't make me say it twice.

- Of course.

My apologies.

- Oh, and Kurt?

Make sure she has big knockers, will you?

(Tense music)

- I hope the straps are not too tight.

Such lovely skin should not be marked.

(Dramatic music)

(Monster yells)

Oh no, stop.

Stop!

Stop, I command!

(Gunshot)

Stop!

(Gunshots) (Dramatic music)

(Monster yells)

(Dramatic music)

- Serves him right.

(Soft music)

- May I present, lady marmalade.

(Sensual jazz music)

- Hello baby.

Lady marmalade here to make all

your birthday wishes come true.

- Isn't she somethin'?

- She sure is.

Can I speak with you in private?

What the hell is the matter with you?

- Did I do something wrong?

- Did it not occur to you that it might look

a tad bit unusual to put Jan’s head on her body?

- In what sense?

- What do you mean in what sense?

She's black, you idiot.

- So?

- So it won't look natural if the colors don't match!

- Excuse me?

I did not know I was dealing with a couple racists.

- No I'm not a-

what you heard-

well you see in con-

Kurt, explain to the woman that I'm not a racist.

- Well, technically you did discriminate based on race.

So...

- Well, sorry that not wanting to cut her head off

makes me such a racist.

- Cut my head off?

Eh, I don't need this shit.

Now one of you better pay me $50

or I'm callin' the cops.

- No! No police.

Kurt, pay the woman.

- That's it, no more house calls.

- Whoa, no, no, wait, wait.

- I will never understand the type of shit

you white folks get up to.

(Crickets)

(Soft vocalizing)

♪ Here comes the bride ♪

♪ here comes the bride ♪

♪ here comes the bride ♪

♪ here comes the bride ♪ (Tense music)

♪ Here comes the bride ♪

♪ here comes the bride ♪

♪ here comes the bride ♪

♪ here comes the bride ♪

♪ here comes the bride ♪

- Why are you doing this to me?

- I'm sorry.

This is taking longer than I thought it would.

- Why is it taking so long? (Tense music)

- Oh, it's hard to explain.

The paths of experimentation twist and turn

through mountains of miscalculation

and often lose themselves in error

(banging)

And darkness. (Banging)

(Yelling)

(Gasps)

(Panting)

Jesus Christ!

(Panting)

I need a drink.

- [Woman on TV] Flip anything silly.

- [Man on TV] Well there's a rock.

Wet or dry?

- Wet.

(Hits)

(Body thuds)

(Tense, quirky music)

(Sighs)

- He makes it look so easy.

(Exhales deeply)

- He never comes down here.

If he thinks what he's doing is right,

then why must he hide?

- He can't bear to see you in this condition.

Can you blame him?

- Bill keeps his sins locked away out of sight,

out of mind, just like that creature in the closet.

You have to stop him.

- Stop him?

(Chuckles)

How well do you know bill?

- I thought I knew him.

Clearly I was wrong.

- Has he ever mentioned the name Doris to you?

Hm, I'm not surprised.

- Who is she?

- When bill and I were in med school,

a young woman named Doris was brutally assaulted

near the campus.

Bill happened to be walking by

and managed to fight off her attacker.

Soon after, he fell in love with her.

And though she was grateful, she rejected his advances,

but bill persisted.

He wrote love letters, made phone calls,

he even recited poetry, all to no avail.

By the time she moved away,

he'd nearly flunked out of school.

- Why are you telling me this?

- Bill is incapable of letting things go.

The only way to stop him is to run from him.

And you are in no position to do so.

- [Man on TV] Morning miss,

we're from the police department.

- [Woman on TV] Good morning.

(Knocking)

- [Man] We're chasing a hit and run driver.

Someone caught the license number

at the place of the accident but didn't get it quite right,

so we're checking all-(Knocking)

- Good morning, sir.

Detective Mancini.

- Hi. Sorry about that.

How can I help you, detective?

- Are you the owner of this house, mister...

- Cortner.

And no, that would be my father.

- Your father?

Is he home?

- No, there's no one here but me.

- I see.

Now, you got a first name Mr. Cortner?

- Bill.

And it's doctor.

- Oh. Okay then, Dr. Bill cortner.

I'd just like to ask you a few questions.

Now, do you know anyone that drives a 1962 red Ford falcon?

- No, I can't say that I do. Why do you ask?

- Hm.

Well, the vehicle I just described

was involved in an accident not far from here.

(Bill chuckles)

(Tense music)

- [Jan] What is it?

- Quiet!

- Who's there? - It's not important.

I can always scream, you know.

- Don't you dare.

(Screaming)

(Muffled yelling)

(Chomping) (Kurt yells)

- Do you hear something?

- No, that was probably my cat.

(Chuckles)

Real noisemaker, that one.

Always getting into trouble.

- Got one myself.

Siamese.

Damn think won't let me near it.

- You'd think they'd know better

than to bite the hand that feeds.

- You would, you would.

(Kurt grunting) (Whimpering)

- You want to do this the hard way?

Fine.

(Jan gasps)

(Tense music)

- Okay.

I guess that's about it for now.

(Bill chuckles)

If you notice anything out of the ordinary,

you be sure and give me a call.

- Will do.

Have a nice day, detective.

(Tense music)

(Jan gasps)

- What are you doing?

- I didn't have a choice. She was about to-

(hits) (Kurt grunt)

(Kurt groans)

- I'm sorry, Jan.

- You should have let him finish the job!

- Don't say that. You don't mean it.

- I do mean it. - The feeling will pass.

When you're back to your old self again,

you'll feel right as rain.

- My old self is dead, lost forever.

- Enough! I won't hear it.

Now I've got to go.

And you.

Harm so much as a hair on her head

and there will be hell to pay.

- Understood.

- I'm surrounded by lunatics!

- Bitch. - Asshole.

(Sleazy jazz music)

- Look, mister, I don't know what you think-

bill?

Is that you?

- Hi.

- Donna.

- Donna.

Yes, of course.

It's been a while. - Too long.

I'm still waiting for that phone call.

- You know how it is, all work.

- All work and no play makes for dull doctors.

You're going to lose that bedside manner of yours.

- Well, I could certainly use a refresher course.

- How about a lesson in anatomy?

- Yours? Anytime.

- No, not mine. The body beautiful contest.

You know, swimsuit models,

plenty of females on the hook.

Your eyes will have a field day.

- Why not?

You're just what the doctor ordered.

Come on, hop in.

On second thought, I just remembered

I have to stop by my place and take care of a few things.

It'll only take a minute.

You don't mind, do you?

Anything you prescribe, I'll take.

That's what I like about you, Donna.

You're always so obliging.

(Turning ignition key)

- [Woman] Donna, is that you?

- Hi, Jeanie.

- Where are you goin'?

- We're on our way to check out some bodies.

- You mean the contest? - Yeah.

- Got room for one more? - Sure.

Bill, this is Jeanie.

Jeanie, this is bill cortner.

Or should I say Dr. Bill cortner?

Well, technically it's bill cortner, Jr.

Isn't that right, bill?

- Why yes, Donna. What a great memory you have.

- We just have to stop off at his place first.

- Sure.

- As a matter of fact, it can wait.

Now that there's two of you, it will have to wait.

- He knows there's safety in numbers.

(Laughing)

(Bright, upbeat music)

- Hey!

(Applause)

We are back, ladies and gentlemen.

Welcome back to the

10th annual miss body beautiful awards,

sponsored by bikini hut.

I am your host, Thad Chaderson,

and before we start the show,

let's get those bellies laughing.

Are you ready?

All right.

Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because it wasn't peeling well.

Peeling well.

(Nervous laughter) Sorry.

Uh, okay, okay.

Why do fish swim in salty oceans?

Because the pepper makes them sneeze.

Okay.

You guys are ready and a lovely crowd,

so let's get this show on the road.

Our four finalists are backstage

and in a moment, we will bring them out

and crown our 10th annual miss body beautiful award.

Now the decision will be based solely on your applause,

so with that in mind, let's get the show on the road.

First up, Helen Appleton.

(Applause)

Helen is a recent graduate of Ohio community college.

She enjoys riding on her tractor

and discovering new species of bees.

(Applause)

Next up, Bettie Prompton.

Bettie knows four different languages,

including Chinese, Japanese, tagalog, and mandarin.

- Time's running out.

You better hurry.

Jan won't be alive much longer.

(Laughs)

(Tense music)

(Applause)

- Third up, Terri Lunt.

Terri Lunt just delivered her eighth child, all vaginally.

Good job, Terri.

- You could always use my body.

I wouldn't miss it. (Tense music)

- And fourth, Peggy Howard.

Peggy is the fourth cousin twice removed from Fidel Castro.

You can see it in her eyes.

- What about my body?

It's much nicer than Jan’s,

and I'm sure she'd be thrilled to have it.

- Or you could have my body.

It hasn't been touched in 14 years.

Shh, I won't tell.

And here you have it, ladies and gentlemen.

Put your hands together for these four finalists

for the miss body beautiful.

(Tense music) (Applause)

- [Bill] Yes.

She'll do.

She'll have to do.

- [Jeanie] Have to do what?

- Oh, nothing, nothing.

- She has the second nicest body I've ever seen.

- Second to who?

- A pinup model.

I'm sure you remember her. Doris Powell?

- I remember her, all right.

- I saw her just the other day and let me tell you,

like a fine wine.

She's only gotten better with age.

- I thought she'd left town.

- She did.

But then her father became ill a little over a year ago.

She moved back.

- You don't say?

- She's still the same old Doris.

Hardly ever gets out, poor thing.

Spends all their time cooped up in her studio.

- Do you know the address?

- Why?

Got something on your mind?

- Just want to check in, for old time's sake.

- You don't have to explain yourself to me.

Heck, I have half a mind to ask her out myself.

- Really?

- From what I hear, I'd have a better shot than you.

- Oh my.

(Applause)

- Wow, my ears are ringing. (Laughs)

Ladies and gentlemen,

the 10th annual miss body beautiful award, Peggy Howard.

Oh. (Applause)

(Bangs)

- Again.

(Bangs)

We must look upon each other's hideous forms.

I wonder which one of us is more awful.

(Bangs)

Nothing could be more terrible than a head without a body.

I hate him for what he's done to me.

(Bangs) (Dramatic music)

(Tense music)

(Soft jazz music)

(Cameras clicking) (Soft jazz music)

- She sure is something, isn't she?

- She's perfect.

(Man chuckles) - Perfect?

That's a bit of a stretch.

Don't get me wrong, she's got a great body,

but I've seen nicer faces.

- So have I.

(Soft jazz music)

- Jane Mansfield.

There's a face that could launch a thousand ships.

You took her head and put it on Doris's body?

That, my friend, that would be perfection.

- I'll keep that in mind. (Man chuckles)

(Cameras clicking) (Soft jazz music)

- Okay, time's up.

- All right, wish me luck.

- What?

- Say Doris, would you like to get a drink with me?

Just you and me, somewhere nobody can find us

and we can finally be alone.

- Not interested.

- Hm, well would you pose for me?

Private like.

I'll pay you money. Good money.

And for hardly doin' nothin' at all.

- Goodnight, you.

- Aww, shucks.

- Haven't you seen it all, mister?

Show's over.

Next time bring a camera.

- You don't remember me, do you, Doris?

- Every guy on the make gives me that same tired line.

- It's me.

Bill.

- Bill cortner.

The man who rescued me.

- I heard the news.

How's your father?

- He's fine, thank you.

What are you doing here?

- I was hoping we could go somewhere and talk.

- I'm sorry bill, but I don't date men.

Not after what happened to me.

- Surely you know we're not all alike.

I'm not on the make for you, Doris.

I've missed you is all.

- Well, I've missed you too, bill,

but as you can tell, I'm not exactly the going out type.

- Well, you can't hide in here forever,

posing nude for a bunch of neurotics.

- If only you knew what it was like

carrying the memory around with you everywhere you go.

- Can I see it?

- Why?

- Trust me.

- Do you find me so appealing now?

(Doris gasps)

- It's all right.

I'm not going to hurt you.

You're beautiful, Doris.

Inside and out.

And no scar can change that.

- Easy for you to say, with your perfect face and all.

- I can help you, you know.

- I've heard that song before.

- I'm serious.

My father's one of the finest plastic surgeons in the world.

If anyone can fix it, he can.

- I've been to doctors.

It's no use.

The scar tissue is too deep.

- That was a few years ago.

Today, nothing is hopeless.

I've seen him fix far worse.

- When you say that, the look in your eyes,

I almost want to believe you.

- Then believe me.

(Doris sighs) - Even if he could help me,

I don't have the money.

- Forget about money.

He'd gladly do it for free.

- Why are you so determined to help me

after all these years?

What's in it for you?

- Isn't it obvious?

It's all part of my evil plan.

- Evil plan?

- To lure you into my secret laboratory

where I'll strap you down to an operating table

and surgically remove your head,

only to replace it with that of my recently

decapitated fiancee whose remains I've kept alive

with the use of diabolical science.

(Doris laughs)

- Okay. Point taken.

I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound ungrateful.

It's just difficult to trust in the kindness of others.

- Well, you can't let the actions of one man

Rob you of your ability to have faith in people.

There's a lot of goodness in the world,

and it would be a shame to turn your back on it.

- I want to believe you.

I do.

Do you really think there's something

to be done about my face?

- Only my father will know for sure.

He's staying this weekend at our country home.

I could take you there for a consultation.

- When? - How about this evening?

For all I know, he intends to leave tomorrow.

- He won't be bothered?

- Let me worry about that.

- Bill.

I don't know what to say. It's like a dream come true.

- Then we'd better hurry before you wake up.

(Doris chuckles)

- Okay.

Just a minute.

- Who are you calling?

- My girlfriend.

I want to tell her the news.

- Before you know what the verdict's going to be?

- You're right.

I shouldn't say anything until I know for sure.

- Good thinking.

- But she's supposed to come over later.

I'll have to write her a note.

- Just tell her you'll see her later.

You don't want her asking a lot of nosy questions.

- Okay.

I'm going to change.

Bring me that note pad on the table, will you?

(Bill sighs)

- Just tell her you'll keep in touch.

I'll leave it on the table where she can see it.

- [Doris] Dear Sarah,

had to go with an old friend, bill cortner.

I'll call you tomorrow.

Xo, xo, Doris.

Here.

- Hm.

- I'll leave it on the lamp.

She'll see it there, won't she?

- [Doris] That's the first place she'll look.

- You look incredible.

- Thank you.

I've waited a long time for this, bill.

- So have I, Doris.

So have I.

- [Detective] Come on, tell me your recognize it.

(German accent) - As a matter of fact, I do.

I remember thinking that it looks exactly

like the one I bought years ago for my beloved Francine.

May she rest in peace.

- Do you remember who bought it?

- Yah.

He was a handsome young man.

Sharp dresser, too.

Said he was a doctor.

- A doctor?

- Yah. That's right.

- [Detective]] You got a first name, Mr. Cortner?

- Bill.

And it's doctor.

- Son of a bitch.

- Even now this thing brings back such memories

of my dearly departed Francine.

I tell you, taking her off life support

was the single hardest... yeah, yeah, yeah.

Shut up. You got a phone book handy?

- [Woman on TV] What's locked behind that door?

- [Man on TV] Horror no normal mind can imagine.

Something even more terrible than you.

- No, my deformed friend.

Like all quantities, horror has its ultimate,

and I am that.

- No, there is a horror beyond yours.

(Scoffs) - What nonsense.

(Phone ringing)

- Hello?

Yes. Who's calling?

(Bangs)

- He intends to kill somebody,

to Rob them of their body, do you hear me?

(Bangs)

You hear me?

(Bangs)

Yes, you hear me.

You know how bill's egotism drives him on and on

to infamy upon infamy?

No good can be born from such evil.

Yet he claims his work is for science, for humanity.

To be joined to flesh not your own, what's human in that?

Or how he treats you.

How you must exist locked behind that door.

We have to stop him.

(Banging) By keeping me alive,

he's given me a power he didn't count on.

A power you can feel across the room

and through that door, can't you?

(Banging)

Together we are more than abominations.

We are a force more formidable than our deformities.

(Banging)

Together we will have our revenge.

I will create power and you will enforce it!

(Banging)

(Tense music)

Look how fearful you've become.

- What makes you think I'm afraid?

(Tense music)

- [Jan] People fear what they don't understand.

And what they can't see.

- Enough!

You're nothing but a freak of life.

And a freak of death.

- You fear what you imagine lies behind that door.

- Imagine?

It was I who helped sew that thing together

with bits and pieces stolen from the morgue.

An arm, a leg,

a torso stitched together like a monstrous Jigsaw puzzle.

- It's only a matter of time before it gets loose

and kills both of you.

- Silence!

I've had enough of your insidious talk.

One more word and I'll cut your tongue out.

(Jan laughs) I mean it!

I'm warning you!

(Jan laughs)

- Now! (Dramatic music)

- No!

(Squelching) (Kurt yelling)

(Kurt yelling) (Blood spraying)

(Jan laughing) (Dramatic music)

- It's not funny!

(Jan laughing maniacally) (Dramatic music)

(Kurt grunting) (Dramatic music)

(Phone ringing) (Dramatic music)

- Bill?

Are you there?

- Help me.

Please.

- Bill, is that you?

- [Kurt] Please.

- That's it, I'm coming over.

(Tense, dramatic music)

- I'll show her.

(Jan laughing) (Tense, dramatic music)

- It's about time you showed some initiative.

Go ahead, thrust away.

You're pathetic.

(Tense, dramatic music)

(Kurt grunts)

(Kurt panting) (Tense, dramatic music)

- We saved your life, you ungrateful bitch.

- Goodbye, Kurt.

(Tense, dramatic music)

(Tense music)

- Lovely place you have here.

A bit lonely, though.

- I've always been fond of it.

- Do you come here often?

- Only on weekends, when I need to get away from the city.

Father less often.

Please, sit down.

We can have a drink while we wait for him to arrive.

- You mean your father's not here?

- He probably stepped out to buy smokes.

It should only take a moment.

Come now, Doris.

Do I look like a liar to you?

- I'm sorry.

I trust you.

I do.

I trust you with my life.

- That's the spirit.

I'll be right back.

(Tense music)

You did this, didn't you?

- He was your pawn, but guilty all the same.

- How did you do it? You're just a-

That thing, behind the door. But how?

- You'll know soon enough.

("What have you done to my heart" playing)

♪ Oh what have you done to my heart, Elaine ♪

♪ it just doesn't seem to be quite the same ♪

♪ you smiled and my heart's no longer mine ♪

♪ it seems to have quite its own design ♪

- I love this song.

- You startled me.

I was beginning to think you'd forgotten about me.

- How could I forget?

You've become very important to me, Doris.

Very important.

I put a little water in yours so it wouldn't be too strong.

- Thank you.

I'm not much of a drinker these days.

- Neither am I.

Here's to your future, whatever it may be.

- I'll drink to that.

Mm. (Chuckles)

My lips are all tingly.

- That's whiskey for you.

- Would you care to dance?

- I thought you'd never ask.

♪ You smiled and my heart's no longer mine ♪

- You are, without a doubt,

the kindest, gentlest, most generous man I've ever met.

- If you say so.

♪ Even when we are far apart ♪

♪ the echoes are singing, Elaine ♪

- I feel funny.

Bill.

You put something in my drink, didn't you?

How could you?

♪ What have you done to my heart ♪

- I told you I'd bring you a body. A perfect one.

Soon it will be yours.

- Bill, you can't.

- I can and I will.

(Tense, dramatic music)

- I want you as a whole woman, not a part of one.

Is it a crime for science to move ahead by years.

- You're killing an innocent woman.

- No, I won't kill her.

I'll keep her head alive the same way

that I've kept yours alive, and then I'll find

her a new body, a better body.

And then I'll keep that woman's head alive

until I can find her a body.

Head, body, head body.

An endless cycle, ad infinitum! (Laughs)

- You're insane!

- Insane?

I have conquered death!

I am a god among mere mortals.

I shall rule the world like a colossus

and nothing can stop me!

(Laughs maniacally)

(Doorbell rings)

- Down here!

- Quiet!

- Help!

Help us! - No, no, no, no.

- Help us, he's insane! - I said quiet, I said quiet.

- Help us, help! - Quiet!

Quiet, quiet. (Muffled yelling)

(Bill groans)

- What's up, doc? (Tense, dramatic music)

- Detective, now's not a good time.

Could you come back later?

- This won't take long.

I just thought you might want this back.

- What is it?

- [Detective] Look familiar?

- Never seen it before in my life.

- See, I thought you might say that,

which is why I called your father.

- My father?

- For what it's worth it, it wasn't his intention

to finger you.

Hell, no father wants to finger their own son.

But he fingered you, bill,

and he fingered you good.

- Please stop saying that.

- He told me all about the car.

Said he bought it as an early wedding gift.

Congratulations.

Jan seems like a lovely woman.

- I have nothing more to say to you.

Now unless you have an arrest warrant,

I would kindly ask that you fuck off.

- You're only delaying the inevitable.

Sooner or later, the truth is going to rear its ugly head.

(Muffled yelling)

(Tense music)

(High pitch noise)

- [Jan, telepathically] Listen to me.

I know you can hear me.

I need you to knock.

Knock louder than ever before.

(Banging)

- What's that noise?

- Jan.

(Bill gasps)

What's my crime?

- What?

- You say I've committed a crime.

What exactly am I guilty of?

- Reckless driving, fleeing the scene of an accident.

- That's it?

All this stuff for a lousy misdemeanor?

- Well it's not a misdemeanor when your passenger dies.

- I'm afraid you're mistaken.

Nobody died in that wreck.

- Well I'm afraid Jan’s body says otherwise.

- Then I suggest you ask her head.

- What the hell are you talking about?

(Bill sighs)

- Please, follow me.

I have something to show you.

- All right, but one false move,

and I will shoot you where you stand.

(Tense, dramatic music)

- After you.

- No, after you.

(Bill grunts)

What the hell is this?

- The future.

Thanks to my research, I'm about to unlock

the key to immortality.

Soon death will be no more a hindrance

than the common cold.

- Don't listen to him.

He's lying to you.

- Says the severed head.

- He's a madman, shoot him!

- Nevermind her.

She's still recovering from a brain injury.

- Enough!

Both of you.

This is a lot to take in.

- Listen to me detective... I've had enough out of you!

It's high time I took you in.

- I am a surgeon in the middle of an advanced operation.

If you stop me now, her death will be on your hands.

- All lies.

His methods result in abominations, and not just me.

Ask him to show you what lies behind that steel door.

- What's behind the door?

- None of your damn business, that's what.

(Banging)

(Tense, dramatic music)

- [Jan] Look out!

(Yelling)

(Gunshots) (Yelling)

(Gunshots) (Detective grunts)

(Panting)

- I look at your feet and I see no hooves.

(Fire crackling)

- My god.

This place is a mess.

I'm going to have to sterilize the entire lab.

Kurt, grab the cleaning supplies...

Of all the days to lose my assistant.

(Tense, dramatic music)

(High pitch noise)

What are you doing?

Knock it off.

(Tense, dramatic music)

(Gun clicking)

Wait, wait I can help you.

(Yelling) (Biting)

- You should've let me die.

(High pitch noise)

- (Bill screams)

(Sizzling) (Screaming)

(Tense, dramatic music)

(Glass shatters)

(Fire crackling)

(Tense music)

(Tires squeal)

(Eerie music)

- Bill?

Bill, it's your father.

Bill?

(Coughing)

Bill?

Bill, where are you?

(Coughing) (Tense music)

(Fire extinguisher spraying)

(Fire extinguisher spraying)

(Tense, tragic music)

No.

No.

Oh, god, no.

(Film reel rolling)

- The date is may 3rd, 1961.

I will now commence the first trial

with my newly developed Lazarus serum.

Its ultimate purpose? Resurrection of the dead.

(Tense music) (Film reel rolling)

In combination with the proper technology,

my serum has allowed a cat's brain to survive

independent of its body.

Whether or not this would work on a human being

has yet to be determined.

Test subject 1-1-9 has been successfully reanimated.

Despite the subject experiencing

chronic transplant rejection,

my serum has kept its organs alive resulting in

profound and horrifying mutations.

(Growling)

I have now revived the head of my recently deceased fiancee.

While it was not my intention,

Jan has become my newest test subject.

(Film reel clicking)

(Eerie music) (Crickets chirping)

(Doris screams)

- [Bill] Where am I?

What is this?

Why can't I speak?

I can't feel my body.

All of my senses stripped away leaving only

a pitiless black void.

I want to scream, but I hear only silence.

This is no way to live.

This is no life at all.

I'm in hell!

An unliving hell!

Help me, please.

Somebody.

Anybody.

Can anyone hear me?

(Tense music)

- I don't know if you can hear me, son,

but you needn't worry.

I will make you whole again.

I give you my word.

(Tense, dramatic music)

- [Bill] Let me die.

Let me die! (Dramatic music)

(Dramatic music)

♪ If you like-a me, like I like-a you ♪

♪ and we like-a both the same ♪

♪ I like-a say this very day, I like-a change your name ♪

♪ 'cause I love-a you and love-a you true ♪

♪ and if you-a love-a me ♪

♪ one live as two, two live as one ♪

♪ under the bamboo tree ♪

♪ And in this simple jungle way ♪

♪ he wooed this maiden every day ♪

♪ by singing what he had to say ♪

♪ one day he seized her ♪

♪ and gently squeezed her ♪

♪ and then beneath the bamboo green ♪

♪ he begged her to become his queen ♪

♪ the dusky maiden blushed unseen ♪

♪ and joined him in his song ♪

♪ if you like-a me, like I like-a you ♪

♪ and we like-a both the same ♪

♪ I like-a say this very day, I like-a change your name ♪

♪ 'cause I love-a you and love-a you true ♪

♪ and if you-a love-a me ♪

♪ one live as two, two live as one ♪

♪ under the bamboo tree ♪

("What have you done to my heart" playing)

♪ Oh what have you done to my heart, Elaine ♪

♪ it just doesn't seem to be quite the same ♪

♪ you smiled and my heart's no longer mine ♪

♪ it seems to have quite its own design ♪

♪ it's own design ♪

♪ it keeps on repeating your lovely name ♪

♪ even when we are far apart ♪

♪ the echoes are singing Elaine ♪

♪ Elaine ♪

♪ what have you done to my heart ♪

(Sleazy jazz music)