Original subtitles

♪ Touché away! ♪

♪ Touché away! ♪

♪ Touché away! ♪

♪ It's Touché Turtle ♪♪

This is Waterloo.

Here Napoleon, the brilliant military genius

tasted his most bitter defeat.

Yes, and if I am so brilliant, how come I lose the war?

Most annoying, old chum.

But tell me, Nappy, before I blast you

why do you always keep your hand in your coat pocket?

That, monsieur Wellington

is more brilliant military genius.

Le telephone! I call the reinforcement.

I say, beastly clever, that Corsican.

Stop you, bounder!

Hello, operator. Long distance to Touché Turtle.

Yes, mon cherie, I will hold the line.

Meanwhile, a few thousand miles away

the great Touché plies his trade.

Duh, it's Orville Meany, Touché. He just robbed the bank.

Relax, Dum Dum, just a routine case.

Okay, Meany, drop everything. This is a citizen's arrest.

Yipe! I-it's Touché Turtle.

I'll be glad when we're off the gold standard.

[Touché] Hello? Oh, hi, Nappy.

How are Josephine and the kids?

What's that? Waterloo, eh?

Okay, Nappy, be right over.

- Gee! - Touché away!

- Gee! - Hey, Touché, wait for me!

Okay, Nap, what's the problem?

Well, I am just minding my business.

Going around conquering countries

when this fellow Wellington starts picking on me.

Ah-ha! Fire one!

Mais, oui. The attack.

Good work, Nappy. You made him give himself away.

As a great military strategist

I suggest you two stage the counterattack

while I cover the rear.

What a brilliant genius.

Not only that, but he's smart too.

Ah-ha! The counterattack.

I shall parry with a tactical diversion strategy.

- Come right in, gents. - Thanks.

Yipes! We've been out-strategied, Dum.

Phew! That was close.

Help!

Nice work, Touché. You broke our fall.

Now then, we employ my great military invention

the catapult.

Monsieur Touché, will pull the string

and be hurled at monsieur Wellington.

- Gosh. - What a genius.

Well, here it goes.

I guess it's still got a few bugs in it, Touché.

Now, messieurs, we shall make military history.

You, monsieur Touché, will roll the rock from that high cliff

and I will maneuver monsieur Wellington beneath it.

Oh, boy, are you smart.

Positively brilliant. How do you do it?

Many years of self-denial.

Nice day for a war, eh, monsieur Wellington?

Is that why you called me here, you bounder?

Oh, dear. What horrible luck.

- But, monsieur, come back. - You had better give up, sir.

[Wellington] I have you personally surrounded.

Uh, Nappy, better look out.

[Touché] What now, Nappy?

Now for my last brilliant strategy.

- What's that? - Unconditional surrender.

Duh, that's strategy?

You must admit, this ain't so bad.

Old Welly gave me the whole island

of Saint Helena for myself.

There's only one thing wrong with it.

[Dum Dum] What's that, Touché?

When the tide comes in, it gets awfully wet.