Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,798 --> 00:00:08,800
The easiest way to win a game
2
00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:10,344
is to make your opponent
3
00:00:10,427 --> 00:00:13,305
think they're playing
a different game entirely.
4
00:00:13,388 --> 00:00:16,015
The only crime I'm guilty of
is being an embarrassing nepo baby
5
00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:18,852
- who's trying to do some good.
- Yeah, how's that going?
6
00:00:18,936 --> 00:00:22,105
I wanna prove to everyone
that I'm not a... fuck-up.
7
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,608
Jay didn't do it.
He's sweeter than I expected.
8
00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:27,361
That lying piece of shit.
This isn't his finger.
9
00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:28,862
Enjoy the remodel.
10
00:00:28,946 --> 00:00:30,864
She's a home decor witch!
11
00:00:30,948 --> 00:00:32,406
What's Mayor Tillman doing here?
12
00:00:32,491 --> 00:00:33,992
How is the pod? Right?
13
00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:36,703
I'm... Hey, I'm still avail to guest, FYI.
14
00:00:36,787 --> 00:00:38,956
I'm collecting signatures
to stop New York City
15
00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,958
from opening its first ever casino.
16
00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:42,584
I got an offer on my place.
17
00:00:42,668 --> 00:00:43,919
It's big.
18
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:47,005
I, uh, joined a dating service
for sexy seniors.
19
00:00:47,089 --> 00:00:48,507
It's called, uh, Last Gasp.
20
00:00:48,590 --> 00:00:51,426
Oh! Last Gasp notification.
21
00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:54,054
- Priscilla, she's so funny.
- You told her about the case?
22
00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:55,973
Just a... a little tidbit.
23
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:57,349
You're being catfished, Charles.
24
00:00:57,432 --> 00:01:00,352
This glitch is from the same footage
as THฤ and Seth Rogen's.
25
00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:03,730
- Something has been cut out.
- Why is the Last Gasp peach logo
26
00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:06,024
the same as on the security footage?
27
00:01:06,108 --> 00:01:08,569
That's who's been messaging me?
28
00:01:08,652 --> 00:01:11,572
- And cooked the footage.
- And maybe killed Lester.
29
00:01:11,655 --> 00:01:13,699
What does it say?
30
00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:16,410
You're such a smarty-pants.
31
00:01:16,493 --> 00:01:18,912
Now I need to come hunt you down.
32
00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:25,836
When you live as a titan of industry
33
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:28,797
on this planet amid the metropoleis...
34
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:34,803
nothing means more than getting away.
35
00:01:36,888 --> 00:01:41,310
To think, to play, or just... escape.
36
00:01:42,644 --> 00:01:44,813
You think he knows
he's goin' to the vet?
37
00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:47,899
Well, if he didn't, he does now.
38
00:01:47,983 --> 00:01:49,693
Oh.
39
00:01:49,776 --> 00:01:53,488
Ooh, it's one of those "Silver Alerts."
Always so sad
40
00:01:53,572 --> 00:01:55,198
- when an old person goes missing.
- Aw.
41
00:01:55,282 --> 00:01:59,911
It says, "Endangered adult male,
74, 5'7", brunette,
42
00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:02,623
"last seen wearing
southwestern cowboy boots
43
00:02:02,706 --> 00:02:04,458
- and a purple scarf."
- Oh! Thank God!
44
00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:06,877
Did it say the boots were turquoise?
45
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,629
Oh, thank God!
46
00:02:08,712 --> 00:02:09,880
Thank God.
47
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:11,757
You gotta save me.
48
00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:14,134
I'm in danger.
49
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:16,678
You hear it all the time.
50
00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:19,473
"The bigger the risk,
the bigger the reward."
51
00:02:19,556 --> 00:02:23,268
But when it comes down to it, most people
aren't willing to take the leap.
52
00:02:23,352 --> 00:02:25,562
What the very successful know
53
00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:29,358
is that you have to take bold risks
to strike gold.
54
00:02:29,441 --> 00:02:34,112
So, tell me, are you willing
to go all in for greatness?
55
00:02:34,196 --> 00:02:36,698
- I said, are you willing?
- Yes!
56
00:02:37,783 --> 00:02:40,827
Sorry.
I know he is our murder suspect.
57
00:02:40,911 --> 00:02:44,039
But the "Bash Steed Greatness Academy"
audio tapes
58
00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:46,083
are really inspiring.
59
00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:47,959
That was $18 well spent.
60
00:02:48,043 --> 00:02:52,464
If only he let it slip where to find him,
then I'd be all in.
61
00:02:52,547 --> 00:02:54,341
Oh, wait a minute,
this might be something.
62
00:02:54,424 --> 00:02:55,425
- What?
- Oh. No.
63
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:59,805
His company website says,
"Bash Steed is a citizen of the universe
64
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:02,140
"with a home in each of the continents
65
00:03:02,224 --> 00:03:05,143
- and a bio module on Mars."
- Wow. Wow.
66
00:03:05,227 --> 00:03:08,063
He's also an asshole, pardon my French.
67
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:09,940
I mean, he did pretend
to be my girlfriend.
68
00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,609
Mm, not exactly sure you can call
Priscilla a girlfriend
69
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:15,612
when you messaged for six hours
and you've never met in person.
70
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:17,781
Oh, how embarrassing.
71
00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:21,034
Someone doesn't know
the term "situationship."
72
00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:24,287
Okay, will you two Muppets
stop arguing?
73
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:27,290
We need to prepare
for our interview with the mayor.
74
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,834
Fine. I'm over it anyway.
75
00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:30,419
Although I still don't know
why we're podcasting
76
00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:32,754
if we're not allowed
to talk about our suspects.
77
00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:36,049
That's because
we are contractually obligated
78
00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:38,468
to make content for Wondify.
79
00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,556
- This is so dumb.
- No, no, no, um, I think interviews
80
00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:44,808
are an evolution of our brand.
81
00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:47,978
And having the mayor
as our first guest is quite the get.
82
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:49,980
I've already reached out
to Meghan Markle's team
83
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,606
about being guest number two.
84
00:03:52,607 --> 00:03:54,735
Okay, that must be him... Oh!
85
00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:56,403
Did you see the email from Wondify?
86
00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:58,613
They want us to be
more like the Drunken Sluts.
87
00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:01,575
You know, so they want us to slut it up!
88
00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:04,202
Ho-ho! Ho!
89
00:04:04,286 --> 00:04:05,287
Jesus.
90
00:04:06,371 --> 00:04:09,791
- Greetings. Ho-ho!
- Hey!
91
00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:11,626
Mayor Tillman in the house.
92
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,170
How are you, Charles?
93
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,797
Oh, my goodness.
94
00:04:15,881 --> 00:04:17,966
- Hello. What a pleasure.
- Hello, how are you?
95
00:04:18,049 --> 00:04:19,885
- Thank you. Thank you.
- A pleasure. Big fan.
96
00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:24,181
Thank you.
Oh, I can't believe I'm here, finally.
97
00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:27,184
Wasn't sure how many overtures
I was gonna have to make
98
00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:30,437
before you would finally take the hint
and let me on the pod.
99
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:31,688
Oh, no, no.
100
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:32,939
But fear not, fear not.
101
00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:36,234
I have been working
on my podcast voice for months.
102
00:04:36,318 --> 00:04:37,569
Check it out.
103
00:04:38,487 --> 00:04:40,155
I am Michael Barbaro.
104
00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:41,573
Uh-huh?
105
00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:42,699
Oh, no, that's it.
106
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:44,034
- Oh!
- Oh.
107
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:47,245
- That was so good.
- Oh, well, let's just get this started.
108
00:04:47,329 --> 00:04:48,330
Alright.
109
00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:50,749
Okay!
110
00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:53,627
Oliver and Mabel,
we got a really special edition
111
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,629
of Only Murders podcast today.
112
00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:58,340
We're sitting with
New York City Mayor Beau Tillman!
113
00:04:59,883 --> 00:05:00,967
- Whoo!
- Thank you.
114
00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:03,386
Thank you very much, Charles.
Uh, a huge fan.
115
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:04,763
- Ohh!
- Yeah.
116
00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:06,932
Uh, you know,
a big part of my platform
117
00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:09,559
is making the streets of this city safer,
118
00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:12,062
so I am excited to chop it up today.
119
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:15,482
Well, uh, great. So the first
and most obvious, uh, question is...
120
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:17,067
- Mm-hmm?
- ...what are you gonna do about
121
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,528
the crosswalk button on 86th and Broadway?
122
00:05:19,611 --> 00:05:22,197
Oh, uh, is... is it broken?
123
00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:24,324
No, but the button gets a little sticky,
124
00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:26,493
and sometimes it... it's...
it's difficult to tell
125
00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:28,203
if you've pushed it or not.
126
00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:32,541
You said you wanted to make
the streets safer.
127
00:05:32,624 --> 00:05:34,251
Oh, I meant from murder.
128
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,086
- Ha! Of course.
- Yeah, so... yeah.
129
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:39,548
'Cause I... I heard your teaser trailer
a while back, then crickets.
130
00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:41,550
So, I have some theories.
131
00:05:41,633 --> 00:05:43,844
Have we looked into the person
132
00:05:43,927 --> 00:05:46,972
who is running against me this fall?
133
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:48,765
Right?
134
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,767
- You guys see?
- Oh! It's a joke.
135
00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:53,311
- Joking.
- No. No, no, no, no.
136
00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:55,814
We cannot podcast about that murder.
137
00:05:55,897 --> 00:05:59,150
- What...?
- Because, well, our prime suspects
138
00:05:59,234 --> 00:06:02,737
bought our network and banned us
from talking about them.
139
00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:06,032
Oh, the Wondify sale. Yeah.
140
00:06:06,116 --> 00:06:07,868
Wait.
141
00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:10,787
Is Bash Steed one of your suspects?
142
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:12,497
Yeah, you know him?
143
00:06:12,581 --> 00:06:15,125
Uh, love him.
I... I... I would be shocked
144
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:17,127
if he was related to your case.
145
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:20,964
Actually, um, you know, Romy,
I... I could really use a coffee
146
00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:23,258
- from that bodega on 74th.
- Okay.
147
00:06:26,469 --> 00:06:27,637
Okay, thank you.
148
00:06:29,347 --> 00:06:31,641
Bash Steed is your murderer.
149
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:22,067
We have to be quick.
150
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:26,821
Romy is Bash's niece.
151
00:07:27,614 --> 00:07:30,825
He had me hire her so he could
keep eyes on me all the time.
152
00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:33,370
And yes, she also happens
to be the best assistant I've ever had.
153
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:35,705
You should see how fast
she gets coffee.
154
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:37,165
Like a Road Runner cartoon.
155
00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:39,960
She's already in the courtyard.
156
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:44,422
Well, then, uh, start talking.
What makes you think Bash is our suspect?
157
00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:45,966
Well, I... I don't actually
know that for sure.
158
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,050
Dammit, Mayor!
159
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:48,885
But if you are investigating him
for something,
160
00:07:48,969 --> 00:07:51,513
chances are, he did that something.
Trust me.
161
00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:53,974
This man will do
whatever it takes to get ahead.
162
00:07:54,057 --> 00:07:56,559
He has paid millions into my campaign.
163
00:07:56,643 --> 00:07:59,020
So, why are you trying to out him?
164
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:00,647
When I was first running for office,
165
00:08:00,730 --> 00:08:02,565
I was up against people
with deep pockets.
166
00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:06,111
I didn't stand a chance,
until Bash opened up his checkbook.
167
00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:09,447
But it turns out, if people
give you money, you owe them later.
168
00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:11,574
Been there.
One time, I took a small loan
169
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:13,493
- from Robert Blake. He was...
- Oliver!
170
00:08:13,576 --> 00:08:15,120
Uh, s... Real quick.
171
00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:18,248
He made me lie under oath.
Continue, please.
172
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,959
Uh, okay.
Well, uh, it started out small.
173
00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:24,087
Uh, building permits,
diplomatic license plates.
174
00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:25,797
But then the asks kept getting bigger.
175
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:28,675
Now, I'm spending so much time
doing his bidding,
176
00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:31,594
I haven't made good
on any of my campaign promises.
177
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,596
That's why I wanted to do your podcast,
178
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,890
so I could win over the public
and stop simping
179
00:08:35,974 --> 00:08:37,976
for some lunatic billionaire.
180
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:41,354
Why don't you do something about it?
Talk to the chief of police.
181
00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:44,524
Who do you think
is the NYPD's biggest donor?
182
00:08:44,607 --> 00:08:46,526
He's literally above the law.
183
00:08:47,152 --> 00:08:48,987
I'll bet Bash hired those dirty cops
184
00:08:49,070 --> 00:08:51,197
I saw over Nicky's body
at the dry cleaners.
185
00:08:51,281 --> 00:08:53,324
Don't doubt it. And meanwhile...
186
00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:55,160
I'm powerless.
187
00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:56,786
Nothing but a puppet.
188
00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:59,122
My ass is sore from having
his hand so far up there.
189
00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:00,665
And not in a fun way.
190
00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:03,376
Great, so if the mayor of New York
has no power,
191
00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:04,836
what the hell are we supposed to do?
192
00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:06,504
Investigate.
193
00:09:06,588 --> 00:09:09,382
I-If you find something,
maybe we can take Bash down together.
194
00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:12,302
Oh, my God, that would be
amazing for my numbers.
195
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:14,804
City people hate billionaires right now.
196
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,098
We're trying,
but we can't even find him.
197
00:09:17,182 --> 00:09:19,726
Well, the other day,
I overheard Romy on the phone.
198
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:23,521
Apparently, he's hosting
some big, secret rich people meeting.
199
00:09:23,605 --> 00:09:27,317
Let me guess.
With Camila White and Jay Pflug?
200
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:31,112
Yep, at his country estate
in the middle of nowhere,
201
00:09:31,196 --> 00:09:33,615
no servants, no service, no witnesses.
202
00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:35,950
I'm not saying
that they're doing blood rituals,
203
00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:37,535
but I have heard rumors
that it's exactly that.
204
00:09:37,619 --> 00:09:39,162
Yes.
205
00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:40,538
Do you have an address?
206
00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:42,415
Yes, the address,
so we can never go there.
207
00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:45,627
Oliver, maybe by surprising him,
208
00:09:45,710 --> 00:09:47,629
we can find something to take him down.
209
00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:50,590
Yes, and if we end up dead,
the mayor can just get Bash on that.
210
00:09:50,673 --> 00:09:51,674
Oh. Smart.
211
00:09:52,884 --> 00:09:54,469
Oh, I mean, as a backup plan.
212
00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:55,845
What backup plan?
213
00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:57,388
Oh, Romy!
214
00:09:57,472 --> 00:09:59,766
Hey. Yeah, we were, uh,
215
00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:01,726
just talking about, um, birth control.
216
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:03,853
- Yeah.
- Morning-after pill.
217
00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:05,605
Yeah, I need it.
218
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:07,107
Feminism.
219
00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:09,651
You know, the...
The right to choose-a-roni.
220
00:10:09,734 --> 00:10:11,236
We should go.
221
00:10:11,319 --> 00:10:13,238
Ribbon cutting
at the New York City Ballet.
222
00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:14,948
God, snooze.
223
00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:16,616
Sarah Jessica Parker's gonna be there.
224
00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:18,701
- She's friends with my uncle.
- And wide awake!
225
00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:20,662
Let's go. Thank you.
226
00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,372
Uh, sorry for the chicken scratch.
227
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:25,166
If I get reelected, first thing
I'm gonna do is fix the public schools.
228
00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:32,048
Do either of you see how insane this is?
229
00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:34,968
We're about to face off
with the most dangerous suspect
230
00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:37,053
we've ever had... in the wilderness.
231
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:40,098
- Oliver, we're going to Connecticut.
- Yeah, well, Putnams don't do foliage.
232
00:10:41,015 --> 00:10:43,101
In fact, I... I should probably stay home
and text my poor wife
233
00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:46,104
who's on hour 18 of her United delay.
234
00:10:46,187 --> 00:10:49,190
She's boarded and deboarded
four separate times
235
00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:51,401
and spent $900 at Hudson News.
236
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:55,196
Well, I for one, am going in
scorched earth, guns blazing,
237
00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:57,240
hell hath no fury like a Savage scorned.
238
00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:59,742
Come on, Oliver, I know
you wanna take those cowboy boots
239
00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,744
out for a spin in the country.
240
00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:04,914
- Didn't you get those from Wonder Woman?
- Linda Lavin.
241
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:06,207
- Ah.
- Do they come in a men's?
242
00:11:06,291 --> 00:11:07,542
They're unisex!
243
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:09,669
And a piece of Broadway history.
244
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:12,422
She wore them in
Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.
245
00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:16,259
And in a private viewing,
only the boots.
246
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,887
- Ew.
- But that's beside the point.
247
00:11:18,970 --> 00:11:21,097
This is crazy, and I'm not going.
248
00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:23,057
We have to, for Lester.
249
00:11:24,475 --> 00:11:27,937
And if it gets all Eyes Wide Shut,
then we can leave.
250
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:32,150
Alright, I'll go.
251
00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:33,484
For the boots.
252
00:11:33,568 --> 00:11:36,738
And I'm sending my wife
a cute little selfie of me in them,
253
00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:38,990
so she can ID my body!
254
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:43,745
He's gotta relax.
How scary can a country house be?
255
00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:50,210
Bash's den of lies.
256
00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:55,965
I wonder what room he was in
when he first posed as Priscilla
257
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:58,927
with the conniving line,
"I really like your profile.
258
00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:02,013
If you could add one color
to the rainbow, what would it be?"
259
00:12:02,096 --> 00:12:04,474
- What'd you answer?
- Brown.
260
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:08,895
Well, the landscape is very... lush.
261
00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:11,689
Yeah, that's what happens
when you fertilize with human remains.
262
00:12:14,025 --> 00:12:16,903
Oh, great!
We... We lost service a mile back.
263
00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:19,322
Now, Loretta's gonna think
that I'm in danger.
264
00:12:19,405 --> 00:12:21,991
And newsflash, I am!
265
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:24,452
Oliver, calm down.
266
00:12:24,535 --> 00:12:27,622
There's nothing to worry about.
Just don't look to your three o'clock.
267
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:33,211
Do we think he's real,
or are we gonna find out
268
00:12:33,294 --> 00:12:35,046
he died 50 years ago in a fire?
269
00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:39,634
I like your skin.
270
00:12:39,717 --> 00:12:40,718
Ah.
271
00:12:41,844 --> 00:12:44,931
That's the first compliment
that ever made my bowels evacuate.
272
00:12:45,306 --> 00:12:46,808
Hi.
273
00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:49,102
Uh, i-is your dad home?
274
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:51,187
Or maybe he's your grandpa?
275
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:52,522
Or son.
276
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,774
If that's the plot twist
of this horror movie.
277
00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:59,070
He's inside with the others.
278
00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:03,074
But Daddy says little boys who interrupt
get sent to the cellar.
279
00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:05,660
Okay.
280
00:13:05,743 --> 00:13:07,036
Well, thank you.
281
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:10,707
And you know, good luck
with your... shiv.
282
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:24,554
Okay, I... I've seen enough.
283
00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:26,889
How 'bout we beat traffic,
avoid getting hunted,
284
00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:29,100
- and hung on a wall?
- Shh.
285
00:13:30,101 --> 00:13:32,979
Listen.
286
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,945
First, I'll remove the spleen.
287
00:13:41,029 --> 00:13:42,613
Careful.
288
00:13:42,697 --> 00:13:45,325
They're harvesting organs
to sell on the black market.
289
00:13:46,701 --> 00:13:49,996
Next, I'll take the kidney.
290
00:13:55,918 --> 00:13:58,254
Dammit!
291
00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:00,590
It's always the wishbone.
292
00:14:01,507 --> 00:14:02,925
They're playing...
293
00:14:03,009 --> 00:14:04,218
Operation?
294
00:14:04,302 --> 00:14:08,473
โช The leg bone's
connected to the hip bone โช
295
00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:10,975
Well, just three adults
playing a children's game.
296
00:14:11,059 --> 00:14:12,727
Not at all creepy.
297
00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:13,978
I'm good to go.
298
00:14:18,232 --> 00:14:19,942
Hi!
299
00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:21,861
Trespassers.
300
00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:25,698
Naughty, naughty.
301
00:14:31,829 --> 00:14:34,916
You said today would be private.
What are they doing here?
302
00:14:34,999 --> 00:14:38,044
Better question,
what are you doing here?
303
00:14:38,127 --> 00:14:41,881
Playing board games
in the privacy of my own home.
304
00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:43,174
Oh, please.
305
00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:45,635
We know what happens
when the three of you get together.
306
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:48,012
Even if it looks like a game of Operation,
307
00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:50,306
we know you're always
playing for something.
308
00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:53,976
Might as well show them.
309
00:15:03,486 --> 00:15:06,697
Okay, a trophy from Walgreens?
310
00:15:06,781 --> 00:15:10,159
Well, there were only so many times
we could destroy each other's businesses
311
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:11,994
before it got boring,
312
00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:14,205
so we started having game nights.
313
00:15:14,288 --> 00:15:16,874
Gives us an outlet
for ruthless competition.
314
00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:18,251
And gossip.
315
00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:20,628
Warren Buffet shaves his bikini line.
316
00:15:20,711 --> 00:15:23,339
- Oh!
- Oh! What?
317
00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:24,882
Okay, fine.
318
00:15:24,966 --> 00:15:27,844
Well, if that's all you guys are doing,
319
00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:31,514
I'm sure you wouldn't mind if we stayed
and watched a little, right?
320
00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:34,725
No, no, no, I... I think...
I think we've overstayed our welcome.
321
00:15:34,809 --> 00:15:35,852
Nonsense.
322
00:15:35,935 --> 00:15:37,854
Please stay.
323
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:38,938
I insist.
324
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:51,409
Yahtzee!
325
00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:53,911
Well, that wraps up round seven.
326
00:15:53,995 --> 00:15:56,122
Maybe they really are
just playing board games?
327
00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:59,208
No, no. No, no, no.
I'm telling you, these people are killers.
328
00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:01,961
They played Monopoly start to finish
and no one flipped the board over.
329
00:16:02,044 --> 00:16:03,087
Sociopathic.
330
00:16:03,546 --> 00:16:05,339
Now, please excuse me.
331
00:16:05,423 --> 00:16:07,508
I have business to attend to.
332
00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:14,682
I'll follow him.
Maybe I can get him to talk to me.
333
00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:23,149
Okay, I'm on Pflug duty.
Oliver, you're on Camila.
334
00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:25,193
Whatever happened,
the three of them
335
00:16:25,276 --> 00:16:27,320
are clearly in on it together.
336
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:28,404
Oh, yes.
337
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:40,541
So, um, how does gaming here
compare to gaming at The Arconia?
338
00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:45,755
How's your apartment, Oliver?
339
00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:50,510
My apartment?
Well, um...
340
00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:55,306
I was thinking of selling.
Uh, got an insanely good offer.
341
00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:56,557
Oh.
342
00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:01,187
What, that's all you have
to say to me about it?
343
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:03,856
Should there be more?
344
00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:06,234
How about, um, mm-mm...
345
00:17:06,317 --> 00:17:08,486
"Thank you"?
346
00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:13,282
I transformed your sad, purple hovel
347
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,451
into a camel-toned fantasy land.
348
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:18,037
I said "camel-toned."
349
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:21,249
When I met you, you had
zero tassels on your pillows.
350
00:17:21,332 --> 00:17:24,669
And now, look at you,
Tassel King of the Upper West Side,
351
00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:25,878
all because of me.
352
00:17:25,962 --> 00:17:27,755
The disrespect.
353
00:17:27,838 --> 00:17:31,467
I should cut off your balls
and shave them into a potpourri.
354
00:17:34,011 --> 00:17:37,473
Sorry, I downed an entire bottle
of Chablis on the 'copter over.
355
00:17:38,849 --> 00:17:40,601
You have a question for me?
356
00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:42,228
Mm-mm. Mm-mm, mm.
357
00:17:42,311 --> 00:17:43,312
Okay.
358
00:17:59,829 --> 00:18:01,998
You followed me all the way out here.
359
00:18:04,709 --> 00:18:06,502
Do you have something to say?
360
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:09,714
I was sort of waiting
till you put down the big blade.
361
00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:13,884
This is a skin tree.
362
00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:17,972
The bark helps
with my Algernon's digestion.
363
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:20,683
Oh, look.
364
00:18:22,018 --> 00:18:23,352
There's Algie in the pool.
365
00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:28,232
How fun.
366
00:18:29,650 --> 00:18:34,280
I was going to cover the pool up,
but Algie loves to swim.
367
00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:39,702
Now, when my other children were young,
368
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:43,956
I was too busy building my empire
to be a good daddy.
369
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:48,419
So, with Algie, I promised
to never miss a single bedtime,
370
00:18:48,502 --> 00:18:50,046
and I never have.
371
00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:54,550
Don't try to be sympathetic, Priscilla.
372
00:18:56,218 --> 00:18:57,762
You catfished me.
373
00:18:58,929 --> 00:19:02,558
You preyed on a buffed-up,
albeit older, romantic looking for love,
374
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:06,312
but I guess that behavior
is to be expected from a murderer.
375
00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:13,527
I am not a murderer.
376
00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:14,945
I hate death.
377
00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:18,491
I lost my papa
when I was very young.
378
00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:21,452
That's what sparked
my fascination with longevity.
379
00:19:21,535 --> 00:19:26,540
You know, the micro-naps,
cryo-chamber, stem-cell shakes.
380
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:29,251
Everyone thinks it's born out of vanity.
381
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:36,133
But the truth is, I want my Algie
to keep his papa...
382
00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:38,928
...possibly forever.
383
00:19:40,054 --> 00:19:44,183
Father, is it time
for my gesunde Leckerei?
384
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:46,519
My boy.
385
00:19:46,602 --> 00:19:48,813
He loves his healthy treat.
386
00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:50,272
Now, if you'll excuse me.
387
00:19:50,356 --> 00:19:51,607
Oh, Charles.
388
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,443
I wish you nothing but happiness.
389
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:09,625
Looking for something?
390
00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:14,672
Or are you joining us
for a game of hide-and-seek?
391
00:20:14,755 --> 00:20:18,050
Sorry, HR won't let me
play games with my boss,
392
00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:21,512
which you are, because you bought us
and then shut us down.
393
00:20:21,595 --> 00:20:24,223
Yeah, I... Well, yeah...
I'm sorry about that.
394
00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:27,727
I couldn't let you talk shit about me
in a murder podcast.
395
00:20:27,810 --> 00:20:29,603
Accusations like that...
396
00:20:29,687 --> 00:20:32,273
I'm just trying to protect my family.
397
00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:35,234
You keep making excuses,
yet I have no evidence
398
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:37,403
that you're actually a good guy.
399
00:20:37,486 --> 00:20:41,282
Well, if you responded to my texts,
I would show you that I am one.
400
00:20:42,116 --> 00:20:44,827
HR also won't let me date bosses.
401
00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:48,330
Plus, there's that whole thing
where you're a suspect.
402
00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:49,707
Mm, fair.
403
00:20:49,790 --> 00:20:52,626
But if I wasn't,
could I take you out to dinner?
404
00:20:54,837 --> 00:20:57,757
I'm not a Bond villain. I promise.
405
00:20:57,840 --> 00:20:59,633
Although I do have a white cat
and my dad's office
406
00:20:59,717 --> 00:21:01,719
is located on the side of a mountain.
407
00:21:05,556 --> 00:21:09,769
Look, I know my friends are eccentric.
408
00:21:09,852 --> 00:21:14,231
But really, we're just a bunch of bored,
rich people hashing out a bet.
409
00:21:14,899 --> 00:21:16,692
The same one we were trying
to settle the last time
410
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:17,943
we were in that gaming parlor.
411
00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:21,322
Do you mean when Lester died?
412
00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:23,532
Uh...
413
00:21:24,074 --> 00:21:25,367
What do you know?
414
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:29,205
Fine. Don't tell me.
415
00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:30,998
I'll find out myself.
416
00:21:32,750 --> 00:21:34,376
Shit.
417
00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:36,295
Alright, cut the shit.
418
00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:40,382
Jay admitted this is about
way more than a stupid trophy.
419
00:21:42,468 --> 00:21:46,347
So, you don't wanna answer
our questions, fine.
420
00:21:47,556 --> 00:21:49,141
We'll do it your way.
421
00:21:49,225 --> 00:21:52,228
We play you for answers.
422
00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:55,564
- Wait, Mabel, are you serious?
- You wanna play games with them?!
423
00:21:55,648 --> 00:21:57,983
The last time they were doing that,
two whole people died.
424
00:21:58,067 --> 00:21:59,485
If we win...
425
00:22:00,402 --> 00:22:02,238
we wanna know everything.
426
00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:03,989
A ratcheting up of the stakes.
427
00:22:04,907 --> 00:22:06,742
Leaning in, liking.
428
00:22:07,743 --> 00:22:09,662
What happens if you lose?
429
00:22:11,831 --> 00:22:14,542
We stop investigating you, forever.
430
00:22:19,672 --> 00:22:20,673
Fine.
431
00:22:22,258 --> 00:22:23,759
And when we win,
432
00:22:23,843 --> 00:22:26,053
if you don't hold
to your end of the bargain,
433
00:22:26,136 --> 00:22:27,263
we'll kill you.
434
00:22:31,308 --> 00:22:33,310
Kidding.
435
00:22:33,394 --> 00:22:35,938
And that's a wrap on me.
436
00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:37,857
Bye, everybody.
Enjoy your twisted game night.
437
00:22:37,940 --> 00:22:40,109
Oliver, you can't leave.
438
00:22:40,192 --> 00:22:42,278
What about doing this for Lester?
You're being selfish.
439
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:45,406
Yeah, enough with
"Oliver is selfish" shtick.
440
00:22:45,489 --> 00:22:49,034
And you're not doing this for Lester,
you're just mad you got scammed online.
441
00:22:49,118 --> 00:22:52,913
And besides, unlike you two,
I have someone to lose.
442
00:22:52,997 --> 00:22:55,332
I'm sorry, but it's true.
443
00:22:55,416 --> 00:22:59,628
So, if you wanna risk your lives
playing a game, go for it.
444
00:22:59,712 --> 00:23:00,796
But I'm out.
445
00:23:08,429 --> 00:23:10,055
Ladies and gentlemen,
446
00:23:10,139 --> 00:23:11,807
the game is Celebrity.
447
00:23:11,891 --> 00:23:14,184
How many famous people
can you guess in a minute?
448
00:23:14,268 --> 00:23:16,395
One round, winner takes all.
449
00:23:16,478 --> 00:23:18,480
Our team will draw a category first.
450
00:23:20,441 --> 00:23:22,026
"Historical figures."
451
00:23:22,109 --> 00:23:24,028
Do you think they know about history?
452
00:23:24,111 --> 00:23:26,447
No way.
They're too busy with world domination
453
00:23:26,530 --> 00:23:28,032
to read biographies.
454
00:23:29,450 --> 00:23:31,744
Mm-hmm. Okay.
455
00:23:31,827 --> 00:23:33,787
Start the timer... now!
456
00:23:35,456 --> 00:23:38,500
He comes to my, um,
uh, my Labor Day party every year
457
00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:41,086
- and bakes a pineapple upside-down cake.
- Vladimir Putin!
458
00:23:42,755 --> 00:23:46,008
Um, um, Jay, he and your granddad
did... did sleepaway camp
459
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:48,093
- in the Schwarzwild.
- Uh, Henry Kissinger!
460
00:23:48,177 --> 00:23:51,180
Um, um... Oh, good God.
461
00:23:51,263 --> 00:23:53,807
He will not shut up
about Crumbl Cookies.
462
00:23:53,891 --> 00:23:55,309
Kim Jong Un!
463
00:23:55,392 --> 00:23:58,145
What are we gonna do?
464
00:23:58,228 --> 00:24:00,064
Hope for an easier category.
465
00:24:00,147 --> 00:24:01,315
This guy.
466
00:24:01,398 --> 00:24:02,483
Bernie Sanders!
467
00:24:03,943 --> 00:24:07,363
Camila, um, he and you,
uh, call each other "Bunny Face,"
468
00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:08,989
- and I don't know why.
- Xi Jinping,
469
00:24:09,073 --> 00:24:10,407
and the reason is just for us!
470
00:24:11,742 --> 00:24:13,243
Time.
471
00:24:15,120 --> 00:24:16,997
You got five.
472
00:24:17,081 --> 00:24:19,375
- Oh. Mm. Hmm.
- Yeah.
473
00:24:21,418 --> 00:24:22,962
Bravo, Papa.
474
00:24:23,045 --> 00:24:26,215
Algie, to the cellar.
475
00:24:31,136 --> 00:24:32,304
Your turn.
476
00:24:39,728 --> 00:24:40,980
Don't worry, we got this.
477
00:24:41,063 --> 00:24:42,606
We're smart people.
We know things.
478
00:24:44,817 --> 00:24:47,152
Okay, our category is...
479
00:24:50,114 --> 00:24:51,573
"Broadway."
480
00:24:54,576 --> 00:24:56,203
โช The coffee cup โช
481
00:24:56,286 --> 00:24:58,372
โช I think about you โช
482
00:24:58,455 --> 00:25:03,252
โช I love you so,
it's like I'm losing my mind โช
483
00:25:07,006 --> 00:25:09,842
โช Lions and tigers
and bears, oh, shit! โช
484
00:25:09,925 --> 00:25:12,219
โช Lions and tigers and bears โช
Oh, shit!
485
00:25:12,302 --> 00:25:14,054
How do we not have Oliver for this?
486
00:25:14,138 --> 00:25:15,764
It's okay.
You know Broadway, right?
487
00:25:15,848 --> 00:25:18,267
Yes, I've seen one play once,
488
00:25:18,350 --> 00:25:20,477
and it was the first 15 seconds
of Death Rattle,
489
00:25:20,561 --> 00:25:22,354
before Ben Glenroy dropped dead.
490
00:25:22,438 --> 00:25:24,690
Just do your best, no pressure.
Well, some pressure.
491
00:25:24,773 --> 00:25:26,900
Our entire investigation depends on it.
492
00:25:29,862 --> 00:25:32,197
Your time starts now.
493
00:25:32,281 --> 00:25:33,907
Okay, um...
494
00:25:34,700 --> 00:25:35,743
Pass.
495
00:25:35,826 --> 00:25:36,827
Hold on.
496
00:25:36,910 --> 00:25:38,078
No, pass.
497
00:25:38,162 --> 00:25:40,706
- Say something, Mabel.
- I'm trying! Pass.
498
00:25:40,789 --> 00:25:42,082
- Pass.
- Anything but "pass"!
499
00:25:42,166 --> 00:25:44,126
Ugh! Where's Oliver when you need him?
500
00:25:44,209 --> 00:25:46,170
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
I know this one.
501
00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:47,796
The boots!
She was naked in the boots.
502
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:49,465
Linda Lavin!
503
00:25:49,548 --> 00:25:52,051
Okay, Oliver claims
he was an assistant doula
504
00:25:52,134 --> 00:25:53,594
- at her birth.
- Uh, Lea Michele!
505
00:25:53,677 --> 00:25:55,846
Oliver says he and this person
506
00:25:55,929 --> 00:25:58,265
took an Ativan and slept through
all of Hurricane Sandy.
507
00:25:58,348 --> 00:25:59,516
Hugh Jackman!
508
00:26:00,768 --> 00:26:03,979
Oliver claims he invented both the name
"Adele Dazeem" and her real one.
509
00:26:04,063 --> 00:26:07,399
The wickedly talented Idina Menzel!
510
00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:09,193
Ugh, Oliver's biggest beef is with...?
511
00:26:09,276 --> 00:26:11,737
The Jessica...
Angela Lansbury!
512
00:26:11,820 --> 00:26:14,323
Oliver says she stole his haircut.
513
00:26:14,406 --> 00:26:15,991
Cynthia Nixon!
514
00:26:16,075 --> 00:26:17,242
- Time.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah!
515
00:26:21,747 --> 00:26:23,457
You motherfuckers beat us.
516
00:26:23,540 --> 00:26:25,584
We sure did.
517
00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:28,879
Now, tell us what you were playing for.
518
00:26:33,634 --> 00:26:34,635
Okay.
519
00:26:36,178 --> 00:26:40,974
The night your doorman died,
we played for a very big contract,
520
00:26:41,058 --> 00:26:42,851
probably the biggest development project
521
00:26:42,935 --> 00:26:46,355
to hit New York City
since... Grand Central.
522
00:26:46,438 --> 00:26:48,482
- The most important...
- Oh, my God!
523
00:26:49,316 --> 00:26:52,611
One of you is planning to build
New York City's first casino.
524
00:26:52,694 --> 00:26:54,279
I was ramping up.
525
00:26:56,198 --> 00:26:57,366
But yes.
526
00:26:58,450 --> 00:27:00,077
We all have our proposals.
527
00:27:01,328 --> 00:27:04,456
Tonight's winner
gets to see theirs come to life.
528
00:27:04,540 --> 00:27:06,959
That's a terrible idea.
529
00:27:07,042 --> 00:27:09,378
You think a casino
would be good for the city?
530
00:27:09,461 --> 00:27:11,672
I think about how much money
it would make.
531
00:27:11,755 --> 00:27:13,632
How much power the owner would wield.
532
00:27:13,715 --> 00:27:15,509
And how it's a chance to make your name
533
00:27:15,592 --> 00:27:17,177
synonymous
with New York City history.
534
00:27:17,261 --> 00:27:18,720
That's Rockefeller shit.
535
00:27:18,804 --> 00:27:19,888
How noble.
536
00:27:21,014 --> 00:27:24,893
And how do you three
just get to decide that, anyway?
537
00:27:24,977 --> 00:27:27,604
Deals have always been made
in back rooms.
538
00:27:27,688 --> 00:27:30,149
Games are just our way of making it fun.
539
00:27:30,232 --> 00:27:33,610
That still doesn't explain why you
edited the footage from that night.
540
00:27:33,694 --> 00:27:38,115
Well, frankly, I don't like anyone
knowing my comings and goings.
541
00:27:38,198 --> 00:27:41,827
Yesterday, I treated Algernon
to a Jamba Juice.
542
00:27:41,910 --> 00:27:44,413
- Ooh.
- Scrubbed that, too.
543
00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:46,415
Mm. And we wouldn't want people
544
00:27:46,498 --> 00:27:49,209
losing faith in the system,
now, would we?
545
00:27:49,293 --> 00:27:52,045
So, you didn't kill anyone?
546
00:27:52,129 --> 00:27:54,715
This has nothing to do with our doorman?
547
00:27:56,675 --> 00:28:01,013
This is about a casino
and a stupid trophy?
548
00:28:04,725 --> 00:28:06,101
Are you guys good?
549
00:28:06,185 --> 00:28:09,605
We just really like the trophy.
Put the trophy down.
550
00:28:22,618 --> 00:28:25,871
Your prize is our fucking finger.
551
00:28:35,255 --> 00:28:37,299
Come on, you overpriced brick.
552
00:28:37,382 --> 00:28:40,344
Survived a hot bowl of barley soup,
and now you crap out?
553
00:28:41,303 --> 00:28:44,765
Thank Mary Tyler Moore.
554
00:28:44,848 --> 00:28:47,559
Oh, dear.
555
00:28:50,145 --> 00:28:51,521
Oh, mother's balls!
556
00:28:52,773 --> 00:28:55,525
You think he knows
he's goin' to the vet?
557
00:28:55,609 --> 00:28:57,569
Well, if he didn't, he does now.
558
00:28:59,821 --> 00:29:02,366
Ooh, it's one of those "Silver Alerts."
559
00:29:02,449 --> 00:29:03,533
Always so sad
560
00:29:03,617 --> 00:29:05,244
- when an old person goes missing.
- Aw.
561
00:29:05,953 --> 00:29:08,330
Oh, thank God! Thank God.
562
00:29:08,413 --> 00:29:10,123
You gotta save me!
563
00:29:10,207 --> 00:29:13,794
I'm in danger.
564
00:29:13,877 --> 00:29:16,838
You poor thing.
Anyone we can call for you?
565
00:29:16,922 --> 00:29:19,758
Well, I tried my wife,
and... and no reception.
566
00:29:19,841 --> 00:29:23,053
Plus, she's probably halfway
to New Zealand to shoot her TV show.
567
00:29:23,136 --> 00:29:24,554
She's a Hollywood actress.
568
00:29:24,638 --> 00:29:27,891
Of course, she is.
569
00:29:27,975 --> 00:29:29,977
- Uh, should we try the police station?
- Uh...
570
00:29:30,060 --> 00:29:32,396
No, no! No, no, no.
The police are in on it.
571
00:29:32,479 --> 00:29:33,605
Goes all the way to the top.
572
00:29:34,273 --> 00:29:38,277
The mayor told me this morning
when he came over to record my podcast.
573
00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:40,904
- I bet he did.
- Yeah.
574
00:29:42,239 --> 00:29:43,949
End of the day is toughest.
575
00:29:47,369 --> 00:29:50,205
- Gotta get the hell outta here.
- We gotta call a car.
576
00:29:50,289 --> 00:29:51,748
Oh!
577
00:29:51,832 --> 00:29:53,959
So, you're a "good guy," huh?
578
00:29:54,042 --> 00:29:56,670
Mabel, you're in more danger
than you think with that finger.
579
00:29:56,753 --> 00:29:58,922
You have no idea
what they paid to get that.
580
00:30:00,007 --> 00:30:01,008
Paid who?
581
00:30:03,468 --> 00:30:04,469
Wait.
582
00:30:04,553 --> 00:30:08,015
So then, this is your legacy?
583
00:30:08,098 --> 00:30:11,059
Trapping a woman at one
of your game nights to get it back?
584
00:30:12,352 --> 00:30:15,772
- A woman and her friend.
- Is no one going to stop them?
585
00:30:16,606 --> 00:30:17,607
Really?
586
00:30:17,691 --> 00:30:19,651
Okay, go. Now.
587
00:30:19,735 --> 00:30:20,736
Now.
588
00:30:24,156 --> 00:30:27,075
And Zach Galifianakis
is playing me in the movie, so...
589
00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:29,953
- Well, isn't that wonderful?
- Yeah.
590
00:30:30,037 --> 00:30:34,333
Alright, let's hop on in.
We can drop off Blaze on the way.
591
00:30:34,416 --> 00:30:37,461
Oh, God, I... Really,
I cannot thank you two enough.
592
00:30:37,544 --> 00:30:39,212
I mean...
593
00:30:39,296 --> 00:30:42,299
...if I had to walk back
to Manhattan in these boots,
594
00:30:42,382 --> 00:30:44,676
Charles and Mabel
would never let me live it down.
595
00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:47,387
Are those your friends?
Um, should we give them a call?
596
00:30:47,471 --> 00:30:50,432
Well, actually they're...
they're at Bash Steed's place,
597
00:30:50,515 --> 00:30:51,975
uh, with no service, so...
598
00:30:52,059 --> 00:30:53,518
- Bash Steed.
- Yeah.
599
00:30:53,602 --> 00:30:55,937
They can't be that good of friends then,
600
00:30:56,021 --> 00:30:58,899
if they let you wander off
all on your lonesome.
601
00:30:58,982 --> 00:31:01,485
Well, actually,
they're... they're great friends.
602
00:31:01,568 --> 00:31:04,821
I mean, if it wasn't for them, who knows
what would have happened to me?
603
00:31:04,905 --> 00:31:07,991
I... I... I wouldn't have a podcast.
604
00:31:08,075 --> 00:31:10,577
I wouldn't have met the love of my life.
605
00:31:10,660 --> 00:31:12,704
And I certainly
wouldn't have reconnected
606
00:31:12,788 --> 00:31:15,290
with my best friend, Ron-Ron Howard.
607
00:31:16,917 --> 00:31:19,002
- I call him Ron-Ron.
- Wow.
608
00:31:19,086 --> 00:31:20,462
Yeah.
609
00:31:20,545 --> 00:31:22,381
- Uh, well, I...
- Meanwhile, I'm the one
610
00:31:22,464 --> 00:31:24,758
who left them alone with a group
611
00:31:24,841 --> 00:31:28,678
of deeply unwell rich people,
you know?
612
00:31:28,762 --> 00:31:30,389
I mean, they... they can't even
call an Uber.
613
00:31:30,472 --> 00:31:32,015
They have no way out of there.
614
00:31:33,558 --> 00:31:35,936
Oh, my God.
What have I done?
615
00:31:37,187 --> 00:31:40,065
- I need you to drive me back!
- No can do, hon.
616
00:31:40,148 --> 00:31:41,942
We're gonna take you
somewhere safe. Get in.
617
00:31:42,025 --> 00:31:45,570
No, no. I'm gonna save my friends
from murderous billionaires!
618
00:31:45,654 --> 00:31:47,239
And if you won't drive me...
619
00:31:49,699 --> 00:31:51,743
- I'm taking the horse!
- Oh.
620
00:31:51,827 --> 00:31:53,829
Oh, oh!
Come on, buddy.
621
00:31:53,912 --> 00:31:57,541
I have a strong sense
you're not the best on bareback.
622
00:31:57,624 --> 00:32:00,752
I'll have you know
that I am the first and last director
623
00:32:00,836 --> 00:32:02,629
to ever stage Equus with a live...
624
00:32:04,631 --> 00:32:06,299
Is everything out here demonic?
625
00:32:07,300 --> 00:32:09,970
How am I gonna get back to my friends?!
626
00:32:10,053 --> 00:32:12,264
Dammit!
How are we gonna get out of here?
627
00:32:12,347 --> 00:32:13,515
Mabel.
628
00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:16,143
Shit.
629
00:32:16,226 --> 00:32:18,520
You know, there's something I have to say,
and I have to say it fast
630
00:32:18,603 --> 00:32:21,273
before I get, uh, sent to the cellar
with Algernon.
631
00:32:21,356 --> 00:32:22,357
What?
632
00:32:22,441 --> 00:32:25,026
Oliver was right.
I threw myself into this case
633
00:32:25,110 --> 00:32:28,738
because I was sad I got catfished,
and I thought I had nothing to lose.
634
00:32:28,822 --> 00:32:30,532
But I have a lot to lose.
635
00:32:30,615 --> 00:32:32,492
My family.
636
00:32:33,410 --> 00:32:35,245
- You.
- Oliver.
637
00:32:35,328 --> 00:32:36,621
Yeah, Oliver.
638
00:32:36,705 --> 00:32:38,582
No! Oliver!
639
00:32:38,665 --> 00:32:41,751
Get away from my friends,
you sons of bitches!
640
00:32:48,758 --> 00:32:50,552
You came back for us!
641
00:32:50,635 --> 00:32:52,512
- I should never have left!
- No, you were right.
642
00:32:52,596 --> 00:32:54,431
These people are insane.
643
00:32:54,514 --> 00:32:56,099
Mabel, get in!
644
00:32:56,183 --> 00:32:58,435
And we got matches!
645
00:33:00,103 --> 00:33:03,190
Oliver, those Linda Lavin boots saved us!
646
00:33:03,273 --> 00:33:06,401
- Where are we going?
- โช To the Old Town Road โช
647
00:33:06,485 --> 00:33:08,778
We're riding all the way to Manhattan!
648
00:33:08,862 --> 00:33:09,946
Ha, ha!
649
00:33:11,198 --> 00:33:12,949
I'm not saying we're gonna
get there quickly.
650
00:33:19,039 --> 00:33:22,292
Can't believe this finger has to do
with the first casino
651
00:33:22,375 --> 00:33:24,211
in New York City.
652
00:33:24,294 --> 00:33:26,713
I can't believe that dead finger
is back in my apartment.
653
00:33:26,796 --> 00:33:30,008
I can't believe Loretta
called in a Silver Alert for me.
654
00:33:30,091 --> 00:33:32,135
And it didn't even mention
any of my credits.
655
00:33:34,513 --> 00:33:36,097
Okay, that must be Williams.
656
00:33:36,181 --> 00:33:38,767
I hope she can identify that thing
before it learns to crawl.
657
00:33:39,559 --> 00:33:40,560
Hmm.
658
00:33:41,436 --> 00:33:42,646
Oh, oh.
659
00:33:44,022 --> 00:33:46,066
Oh, uh, look who, uh...
660
00:33:46,149 --> 00:33:49,152
You'll have to excuse me
for arriving so late.
661
00:33:49,236 --> 00:33:51,655
They say don't go to bed mad,
so I thought I'd come
662
00:33:51,738 --> 00:33:53,657
and settle our little tiff.
663
00:33:53,740 --> 00:33:56,409
Hm, you mean the fact that you lied
about the casino
664
00:33:56,493 --> 00:33:59,204
having anything to do with our murder?
665
00:33:59,287 --> 00:34:03,458
Like it or not, that finger
decides the casino bid,
666
00:34:03,542 --> 00:34:06,753
and New York is only
giving out one permit.
667
00:34:06,836 --> 00:34:09,714
I don't know if you've seen
Jay and Bash's proposals,
668
00:34:09,798 --> 00:34:11,508
but they're grotesque.
669
00:34:11,591 --> 00:34:15,136
Jay wants to put his
in the 92nd Street YMCA
670
00:34:15,220 --> 00:34:19,266
because, and I quote,
"A pool would be so sick."
671
00:34:19,349 --> 00:34:23,103
And Bash's big idea is a spaceship
672
00:34:23,186 --> 00:34:27,399
floating over Times Square
and the M&M's store.
673
00:34:27,482 --> 00:34:29,859
- A travesty.
- Hmm. Yeah...
674
00:34:29,943 --> 00:34:32,988
My casino will be different. Bespoke.
675
00:34:33,071 --> 00:34:36,825
I am giving the people of New York
what they don't know they need.
676
00:34:36,908 --> 00:34:38,702
A gambling addiction?
677
00:34:38,785 --> 00:34:41,079
I will make gambling so chic,
678
00:34:41,162 --> 00:34:43,832
Gwyneth Paltrow will shit her capris.
679
00:34:43,915 --> 00:34:46,543
That's really compelling, Camila,
680
00:34:46,626 --> 00:34:49,045
- but we're not giving you the finger.
- Mm-mm.
681
00:34:49,129 --> 00:34:51,214
Oh, I worried you might say that, so...
682
00:34:51,298 --> 00:34:53,466
Give me the finger!
683
00:34:55,218 --> 00:34:57,887
You're bluffing,
and we're not giving you the finger.
684
00:35:00,181 --> 00:35:01,808
Willing to risk it?
685
00:35:02,892 --> 00:35:04,936
Give her the finger.
Give her the finger.
686
00:35:09,566 --> 00:35:14,988
I can't wait to share with the world
my quiet slots.
687
00:35:15,071 --> 00:35:18,116
It's not... "ding!"
It's... "ding."
688
00:35:20,785 --> 00:35:24,039
I think I'll start renovations with...
689
00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:27,375
Oliver's apartment.
690
00:35:27,459 --> 00:35:30,337
What are you talking about?
691
00:35:30,420 --> 00:35:32,922
That offer on your place was from me.
692
00:35:33,006 --> 00:35:36,092
I'm the one buying up
all the apartments here,
693
00:35:36,176 --> 00:35:38,261
so I can finally build.
694
00:35:40,930 --> 00:35:43,266
Exclusive first look.
695
00:35:46,895 --> 00:35:49,105
The Camila Club?
696
00:35:49,189 --> 00:35:51,024
Is that...
697
00:35:51,107 --> 00:35:52,525
Our lobby?
698
00:35:53,943 --> 00:35:55,403
Our courtyard?
699
00:35:56,404 --> 00:35:59,991
You're turning The Arconia into a casino?
700
00:36:01,368 --> 00:36:03,870
Well, have a good night.
701
00:36:03,953 --> 00:36:07,040
Hopefully, they'll have murders
in your next building, too.
52823
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.