Original subtitles

On the threshold of the 21st century, scientific research reveals that sexual

relations will play a greater role in the lives of the average man and woman.

Geoffrey Montclair, the former medical student, now a filmmaker and astrologer,

knows from his extensive reading into the scientific literature of sex that

masturbation can sometimes be the single most important safety valve of the

mind.

He had always had a strong desire to bring to as wide an audience as possible

the various techniques of self -love that he had read about.

in Kinsey and Masters and Johnson.

He was fascinated by the beauty of candles, but also knew that the simple

function of the hand was more precise in its deliverance of ultimate response.

Mutual masturbation was something generally practiced by young girls

boarding schools.

But Jeffrey Montclair felt that it should have a wider practice.

The use of the vibrator has been spoken of by many women liberationists as the

great relaxant, sometimes being used two or three times a week for solitary

pleasure.

The director knew that masturbation in men was a fairly simple and widely

practiced technique and never drew too much attention to it.

And from his dealings as an amateur astrologer, he knew that the horoscope

the Pisces girl calls for exotic water sports.

He then turned his knowledge into what he considered valuable sexual advice for

the Pisces individual.

The dildo, now on sale in almost every drugstore in the country, is preferred

the quiet, almost secretive Virgo types.

The director felt that mutual masturbation is most certainly a great

from the split personality types of the Gemini individual.

He therefore felt that a mirror would almost always heighten the fantasy

of a true Gemini.

Geoffrey Montclair wanted to attract as wide a variety of performers with

various zodiac signs as possible.

They came from near and far, attracted by the poetic advertisements that he

placed in the show business trade journals, calling for honest, sincere

be used for educational purposes.

Even Papa Mobutu, recently from the jungle, where he grew tired of the birds

chattering, came to the big city to look for fame and fortune.

Geoffrey Montclair knew that the highest art form of the 20th century was the

motion picture.

And of all the many areas of knowledge that he felt society to be lacking in,

deemed it most urgent that mankind should be enlightened in all the many

splendid aspects of love, especially the coming together of the races.

So devoted and sincere was he to his art that he was often unwillingly used by

unscrupulous producers whose only concern was making money.

Mr. Godfather, his present producer, was no exception.

Why do we have to sit here like this?

It's better this way.

Did I get any calls today?

Just one.

The same one as yesterday.

Said they would call back later.

That phone call, was it those credit people again?

Yeah.

Do you owe them a lot of money or something?

Now I ask you, have you ever seen such shit?

I do the best I can with the little money you pay.

Besides, I know my art, my creation. He's carrying the phone.

Yeah, he wanted to know if your credit was good.

It is good, isn't it? The best.

The very best.

I'm glad to hear that.

You know my check. It bounced back again.

Hold that. I'll take care of that right away.

You're right.

This is incredibly poor.

We could never get something like this in the can.

Do they know that this is just a rehearsal?

You don't think I'd tell them a thing like that, do you?

All art is full of deception.

This is only a small part of it.

Look. We're wasting precious time and money. I'm not paying anyone for crap

this. Cut!

Damn it, you two.

Don't just lie there and roll around grunting.

Haven't you ever been in love?

That's all I'm asking.

Draw into yourselves to reveal the hidden magic of a summer's night after a

dance. I can't help it if he can't do a simple thing like make love to a woman.

Why, you bitch. Okay, okay, hold it.

Mr. Godfather here has put up a lot of money for this.

Not only that, but in the last production he lost his shirt.

It's the same man from the credit card.

Hello? Oh, yes.

No, no, he's not in yet.

Is there any message?

Okay, I'll tell him you called.

Goodbye.

Well, you don't expect me to answer the phone in the middle of a production, do

you?

Look, let's leave them alone. When they get something going, they'll call us.

I mean, I'm tired of sitting behind that ridiculous tree all day.

Besides, we have some stuff on the back on the projector to look at.

Sam, I don't see why you can't excite me like all you spades have a reputation

for. Come on, you bitch.

You know how these things happen.

Besides, I'm not too used to working like this in front of an audience.

Well, there's no one here now.

What kind of an actor did you get me anyway?

$25 a day and he can't even get it up.

They'll be okay in a little while.

You know, you're just like all the other men I know. They can't turn me on

either. Oh, yeah? And what about all those little girls you're supposed to be

shacking up with all the time?

You better mind your own goddamn business, Spade. Hey, what the hell is

this Spade shit, huh?

You make me sick.

Hand me one of those porno books. Maybe that'll turn me on.

Wait a minute.

I have an idea.

Lie down flat.

Hey, what you gonna do?

Never mind. Just do it.

This is a good one. I have a copy of this one at home.

To turn on all your little chicks?

Shut up. Just close your eyes and lie there and listen carefully.

It's the story of a little 15 -year -old schoolgirl who plays hooky to go to a

movie with her boyfriend.

That day I rolled up my panties and left them in my school bag.

It was beside me now on the floor next to Jim's strong legs.

Oh, wow.

I thought I would faint when he finally came.

His cum flowed out of me like a hot river of honey, sweet honey that I'd

lick and take into my mouth and swallow.

Oh, wow, Monica.

You're really doing it to me. More.

More.

You're not doing it the way you're supposed to. Well, don't keep fussing at

Look, there's a whole lot of bread riding on this. Bread for you and bread

me. So let's cool it and get it going, huh?

For this, I pay good money.

I... Christ!

We leave you two alone to turn each other on, and all you can do is fight.

This scene was intended to explore the great enlightenment of our times, the

coming together of the races.

You two have challenged my art.

Ah, yeah, well, this super stud spade shit you picked up off the street can't

get a simple heart on.

Sure, baby, sure.

It's my fault, right?

You're... supposed to be the Snow White Princess of the Silver Screen.

And me, poor nigga that I happen to be, I just can't get excited over your pasty

ass.

Well, fuck all of you, because I'm cutting out of here and heading uptown

me some drawers with some soul.

And piss on you.

I got a subpoena here for some producer, Mr. Godfather.

You making some kind of folk movie here or something?

I'll make you a star.

He's good.

He really is.

A lifesaver. A real lifesaver.

Between takes, Monica liked to walk around the corner from the studio to the

famous hideout of many of the industry's top artists and directors.

She takes several breaks like this every day.

How are things going?

Don't ask.

How about your usual there?

Oh, by the way, your brother Bob called a little while ago.

Left a message.

He's going to be out of town for a few days.

Say, did you hear this one?

A fellow told me just a little while ago.

One has 14 balls and lives in the woods.

14 balls and lives in the woods.

Give up?

Yeah. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Before Monica returns from her break, Jeffrey Montclair busies himself

with the various medical and astrological charts he always consults

takes to determine the new positions of love that occasionally coincide with the

constellations of the zodiac.

He liked Monica best of all his performers because she understood

was trying to do.

For this reason, the director has promised her an important role in a

planned to finish up soon.

In this position...

Geoffrey Montclair felt that he was bringing out the true Taurus nature of

The steady, faithful, and affectionate nature of the Taurus male makes for

greater sexual response in this face -to -face embrace.

The Taurian male derives great pleasure from the body contact of the one he

loves.

The cancer woman is generally shy in matters of sex.

So after careful consideration of the nature of this zodiac sign, the director

thought of a position in which the cancerian woman need not face the man

having sex with.

Another position for the Cancerian woman is one in which she leans her body

greatly forward.

This position is very stimulating for her, and if it is a case where the male

a Taurus, then deeper satisfaction is bound to come, for the Taurus male loves

to fondle and caress his mate from behind.

Geoffrey Montclair sometimes found it necessary to talk to his performers

the importance of their work.

In a way, they were assisting in his broad plan for the betterment of

The Libra female is also shy and somewhat secretive in sexual matters It

that they can verbalize their fantasies But what goes on in their heads must be

truly fantastic Libras are born between September 24th through October

23rd

Another type of dildo that the director thought might help a troubled woman is

this more lifelike reproduction of the classic instrument.

Little did this unaware girl realize, however, that the implement so

played with was a direct cast made from the director's own penis.

A position that will bring deep and penetrating happiness to a Leo woman is

in which she will dominate the situation.

Leos are quite romantic and know fully how to provide the correct blend of

sentimentality and passion.

Leos are born between July 23rd and August 23rd.

The combined aspects of the Sagittarius man and the Aries woman make this one of

the most compatible unions of the Zodiac.

Geoffrey Montclair felt that Brenda and her boyfriend best expressed this high

degree of compatibility of all his performers.

The Scorpio woman and the Leo male are frequently incompatible.

However, the director felt that here was an aspect of sexuality that could

possibly bring these opposing signs together.

The Scorpio woman with her deep, rich fantasy world, and the Leo male with his

single -minded pursuit of an objective.

Imagination, creativity, and skill are the hallmarks of the Scorpio

Their utilization of the usual for the purpose of the unusual goes a long way

toward the fulfillment and happiness these strong personalities require.

Often at odds with one another, they do however form a compatible union,

especially when both share in planning what will lead them to the ultimate

fulfillment.

The Scorpio person is strong, capable of enormous physical stress and extremely

passionate. The Scorpio is born between October 24th and November 22nd.

The hideout drew many young and aspiring artists to the city.

There they came with a single hope and desire to meet someone with an inside

line who could turn them into an overnight success.

Inga was no exception.

How much is a rum and coke?

A dollar and a half.

Could you make that just a plain coke, please?

I said just a plain coke, please.

The lady said to let you have what you want.

She wants to buy you a drink.

But I can't do that.

I don't even know her.

It's okay.

She's a good gal. She comes in here all the time.

Her name's Monica. What's yours?

Inga.

Okay, I guess.

I think it was Somerset Maugham who wrote a story about an older man who met

boy that he liked right away for the first time.

That boy was so much like the man when he was a boy that it was like looking

into a mirror of time.

I get that feeling looking at you.

You know, like that mirror.

Did you run away from home too?

Yeah.

A long time ago.

No one should ever run away from home.

Unless they have enough money to do it.

I got up this morning.

Got on my bike and headed for the city.

54 miles on a bike.

Boy, am I sore.

Do you want something to eat?

Oh, okay, thanks.

Would you get us something, please?

Where are you from, Inga?

Landau, out on the island.

Maybe you've heard of it.

My father's the mayor out there.

Oh, you poor kid.

Let's sit over there, okay?

I still don't know why you're being so kind to me, buying me the sandwich and

stuff.

Well, let's just say that I've had a pissy day, and doing this makes me feel

better.

Okay.

You know, they all seem to come here.

Some with dreams of meeting Mr. Right, some with stars in their eyes, hoping to

land a part in a play or a picture.

I should know. I did the same thing myself once.

That seems like a hundred years ago.

I bet you haven't even got anything lined up.

Like a job or a place to stay, even. When I got up this morning, I didn't

what I was going to do.

I just left everything behind.

God.

Look, I can help you.

I live with my brother.

He's a writer.

And, uh, well, he'll be out of town for a few days, and you can use his room

until he gets back.

Really?

You have a place for me to stay?

Yeah. Oh, wow.

Well, come on. Let's go. Okay.

When Monica first came to the big city to find fame and happiness in the

theater, it was Brenda who helped her out.

The soft, dark -haired Brenda who still worked for Jeffrey Montclair.

Monica never realized that the sleeping urges of her body would be aroused to

such peaks by another woman.

And now, even now, she couldn't keep from thinking of Brenda as she realized

what she was leading the innocent Inger into.

Again, the director's experience as a medical student leads him to direct one

man's simplest functions from the point of view of personal hygiene.

If a man must masturbate, says the great director, let him do it with soap, and

the whole thing can be a cleansing experience.

Then, if so desired, Vaseline provides a stimulating warmth that would thrill

even the cold -hearted Virgo man.

Geoffrey Montclair had dedicated his life to the infinite attention to

Even when the couples have been married for years and have done everything, he

feels it necessary to instruct, to direct, and in a true sense control the

passion of the lovers.

The psychic presence of these married Pisceans is the most compelling aspect

this truly compatible zodiac house.

Often, without a word, each will know what the other needs or desires most.

In their zeal to fulfill these unspoken urges of their partners, they discover

overwhelming satisfaction in the sharing that is associated with gift -bearing.

The Piscean woman is intensely aware of her femininity.

while the male is usually more mysterious in the subtle way he can get

fulfill his hidden desires.

Mmm.

Thank you.

Oh, hi, Jeffrey.

Yeah, I'm feeling better now, thank you.

Ten o 'clock tomorrow morning?

Look, Jeffrey, not another scene with that damn Spade.

And no more mailmen, please.

Well, I feel rotten about what happened this afternoon.

It's degrading.

Jeffrey. When I started acting for you in films, I thought I was going to get

big chance.

But all I ever get is a big... Okay.

Okay.

But don't forget about the part you promised me.

Don't tell me you forgot.

The part in the Paradise sequence you've been working on for such a long time.

Well, then it's still mine.

Oh, great.

Listen, Jeffrey, I have a friend here.

I'll see you tomorrow, okay?

Okay, bye.

Still hurt after that hot shower?

54 miles on a bike can do it.

You didn't tell me you were an actress.

And who's this Jeffrey?

Oh, that.

Well, that's just something I do from time to time to keep alive.

And don't worry who this Jeffrey is. He's one creep you're never going to

I didn't want to seem like a stupid kid before when you bought me dinner. But

that's why I came to this city.

To be an actress in movies or plays.

My mother was in acting.

But she died when I was seven.

I remember her, though.

She was beautiful.

And your father wanted to keep you all to himself.

Clean and pure.

He thinks anyone who acts on the stage or screen is dirty.

He'll be looking for me soon.

Probably has two of his bodyguards out right now looking for his precious

daughter. But I'm away from all that now.

And I have a feeling I'm really going to start living.

Come on.

Let's go back in the other room.

Monica, could you help me get a part in a movie?

Anything, it doesn't matter.

You know the people to contact.

And maybe, just maybe, if I get a part right away, I can prove I have the

talent.

Life's not for you, kid.

And I'm not going to help you get involved.

A long time ago, I was in the same position you are.

And I asked someone to help me.

Well, she did.

And I've hated her for it ever since.

Oh, but Monica, you have to help me.

You're the only person I know who I can turn to for help.

Please don't let me down now.

Well, maybe I can look around.

Kind of keep my ears open for something that sounds good.

But you'll have to do it my way.

When I say so, okay?

There's some oil in the drawer over there.

Would you get it for me, please?

What are these?

They're all written by the same person. Bob?

I told you my brother Bob was a writer.

They're good, too.

He's one of the best in the business.

Put them away for now.

You're gonna stay in bed all day tomorrow while I go out and shop for

for you to wear.

You can have fun reading them then.

Lie down and let me rub those 54 miles out of your leg.

That feels good, Monica.

After my mother died, I got polio. Oh, not too seriously, though.

And my father had a housekeeper who used to rub me like this.

Did she ever touch you like this?

Yes.

And did she ever kiss you like this?

The kisses, tender touching, the boldness of the very act itself causes

passion to boil higher and higher.

Inga, too, full of the first touch of Monica's skillful hands and lips,

with newfound joy.

Yet, in Monica's mind, she found it difficult to forget Brenda.

The mirror -like experience of passion caused her to weave in and out of the

complicated fabric of time.

She the teacher now, with Inga, and in a flash, she Monica the learner,

quivering beneath the delicate touch of Brenda's hands and lips.

No.

Lover, learner, learner, lover, whichever the role, Monica began to

thing. She loved this runaway child who sighed and gasped in their simple

exchange of pent -up passion.

She lost herself in the fantasy of time and became trapped in the web of her own

confusion.

Though it was men that she spent most of her day with, it was the touch of a

younger girl that really sent her blood gushing to all the hidden corners of the

vast universe of her desire.

She wanted more and more.

More.

She'd do anything to keep Inga to herself.

Anything.

The following morning, Monica enjoyed her brisk walk to the studio.

She was still filled with the joy of last night's experience.

Unexpectedly, Monica's brother came back to town to pick up a manuscript he had

been working on.

Well, hello.

I'm Monica's brother.

My name is... Oh, you're Bob.

Yes, I recognize you from your picture.

Yeah, and who are you?

My name is Inga.

Monica said I could stay and use your room while you were out of town.

I've only been here one night.

That's all right.

I just came back to pick up a few papers I was working on.

Hey, listen.

Could you wait in the other room until I get some clothes on?

What sort of writing do you do?

I'm surprised you haven't seen any of it around yet.

My sister's always showing it to everybody.

Well, to tell you the truth, I have.

Oh, really?

Which one?

Or have you read them all?

Well, I started one this morning about a little girl who goes to a movie and is

turned on by this man who comes to sit down next to her. That one.

That's a true story.

The fact that it happened to Monica when she was 15 years old.

We've always shared things.

Wow. And so well written.

Yeah.

That day his fingers touched me.

Crawling like a caterpillar in a frozen town.

His hands.

Search. Explore.

Search.

Is that your bicycle out in the hall?

Yes.

My chief source of transportation.

I've got a bicycle downstairs in the cellar. I haven't used it lately.

How's that to go for a ride?

During the ride, Inge had mentioned her aspirations to be an actress.

But not knowing that Monica did not want Inge to work for Geoffrey Montclair at

any price, Bob called the director to set up an interview for Inge for the

following afternoon.

The director had lived by a line he once read in the Critique of Pure Reason.

It went, Two things fill my mind with ever new and increasing wonder.

The starry heavens above me and the moral law within me.

At first, the Capricorn man may seem to be sexually restrained.

He prefers his partner to take the lead.

Geoffrey Montclair thought he had created the perfect position of love for

Capricornian, who is fond of the female femininity.

Any woman who wants a Capricorn man must be prepared to clearly show him that he

is wanted, that he is loved, and willing to be sacrificed for.

The Capricorn man is born between December 22nd and January 20th.

The Aquarian couple are hard to beat for their free and open approach to

passion. Both highly magnetic individuals, they usually practice only

variations of accepted techniques.

But because of their genuinely creative nature, even the slightest variation is

handled with great understanding and skill.

Aquarians are born between January 21st and February 19th.

A position greatly admired by the Virgo woman is one in which she feels

dominated.

But the director knew from his long association with the stars and his

of medicine that the Virgo woman is only to be dominated in bed.

In her daily life, she is extremely practical, efficient, and makes for an

excellent business executive.

And here is another position for the somewhat shy Libra woman.

Though they enjoy the passion of love as intensely as any other zodiac house,

the Libra woman likes to balance her rather strong feelings of passion with a

hidden or passive role played during the act of love.

Jeffrey Montclair's approach to cinema was greatly influenced by the stars, as

well as the poets of yesteryear.

The sequence he is filming now was inspired by his constant observation of

stars at night.

He was fascinated by how they seemed to sway in a poetic, rhythmic dance.

Georgia and Michelle were a gifted pair of entertainers who sought fame and

fortune in the cinema.

They had read of Geoffrey Montclair's efforts with his special brand of

educational astrological cinema, and they were eager to offer themselves to

in the best interests of scientific discovery.

Besides, it... wouldn't hurt any if they ultimately became the highest paid and

most sought after performers in the industry.

They both considered themselves the most beautiful creatures on God's earth

because of the vast number of heads they turned while doing a simple thing like

walking along the street.

Say, that's some shiksa.

Happy.

Thank you.

I accepted you for an interview today because you both had interesting

What my producer and I are involved with here is a unique presentation of the

inner forces that guide and mold and shape our destinies.

You will be expected to speak freely, spontaneously, and honestly on

the various aspects of your particular love lives.

I want your answers to lay it on the line. No bullshit.

Georgia, it says here that you've worked with Andy Fuckhole.

Right on, honey. I play the part of Super Queen in Ashcan.

Well, I'd like you to describe for us how it was that you first discovered

condition. It was in the Bronx Zoo when I was just a little thing.

One afternoon, my mother took me to see the gorilla.

Wow, I was so excited.

I didn't know it was happening.

I took one look at that big hairy thing, eating that banana, and I almost came

in my pants.

I was too young, of course, but I do remember it was my first direction.

How old were you?

Three.

When was your first human encounter?

I never knew my father, and my mother was a lady wrestler who used to have a

of boyfriends come over.

Sometimes she tied them up in the bedroom and whipped the shit out of

They come all over the place.

Well, she knew this big hairy fuck that had a craving for little boys.

And that was it.

But when I was about 14, I remember that's the first time that she brought

home. Well, he took me into the bedroom and he played King Kong with my ass.

The savage beast.

I fell in love with him.

Well, Michelle, can you tell us about what it is that really turns you on the

most?

Dreams. That's what seems to do it best these days.

Yeah, tell us more, tell us more.

Well, mostly I dream about fire hydrants, you know, Johnny Pumps.

It seems that when I dream about them, acres and acres of them, all different

sizes, all different colors.

My legs are like rubber, and I go bouncing all over them, miles and miles

them, all night long, until they start to shoot water, way up in the air, all

over everything.

And I wake up exhausted, honey.

Now, what do you suppose a dream like that could mean, sweetheart?

Tell me some more about this King Kong freak of yours.

What kind of cock did he have?

You know, it's funny you should ask that.

He did have a very unusual instrument.

As a matter of fact, it was the most different type instrument I've ever

Yeah, go ahead.

Well, to tell you the truth, it's kind of embarrassing to talk about. You see,

I'm trying to explain.

I loved Herbert.

Herbert? Did he have emotion like a heart on his cock?

Why, yes, he did.

How did you...

if I could only have had a camera going this far out.

Part of the director's effort to create a truly unique form of cinema was his

need for an ape.

Papa Mobutu, the sole surviving member of the Mangani species, was looking for

work at the moment, and further, he was without a mate, the single most

disgraceful situation that could possibly befall a member of his species.

Being new to town, Papa Mobutu searched the ads for interesting work.

and found his way to Jeffrey Montclair's studio.

I didn't know you were ready. Okay now?

My lifelong quest for truth, beauty, and innocence has led me down many

strange and wonderful paths, but none so wonderful as the realization of my

boyhood fantasy of creating a superman right before your very

eyes.

Tarzan.

You will remember that while Tarzan himself was not a true genetic hybrid,

was nursed by Kala, a female gorilla of the Mangani species.

It has been through painstaking research and considerable expense that we have

been able to locate a true Mangani ape.

Since early childhood, it has always been my dream to record on film the

of various species in the act of producing a super being.

Ladies and gentlemen, Papa Mambuto.

The last and sole surviving member of the Mangani ape.

In just a few moments, Papa Mabuto will begin to mate with a very talented lady

who had heard of our project and willingly volunteered herself for this

ritual.

We are very proud to have with us today Dr. Mary Weed, the famous anthropologist

who has written several books concerning the mating habits of the Himalayan

mountain goat.

She is presently employed as a change booth operator for a popular 42nd Street

penny arcade, but hopes to make a big comeback soon to the world of science.

Lady Weed may soon become the first woman since the beginning of recorded

to bear an offspring of the Mangani ape.

Remember, What you are about to see has never before been attempted.

You are a witness at what may well be the most daring and creative endeavor

undertaken in the annals of motion picture history.

Right on, sweetheart.

All right.

Okay, here we go.

Come on. Right over here.

You'll like this. Just down here. Right.

Yes, here we go.

Isn't that nice?

All right, now. Well, you're going to like this. Come on over here.

We've got a nice surprise for you.

Down right here. That's right.

Nice.

Right over here. Isn't that good?

Nice. Good gorilla.

Oh, come on. Come on, let's try it again. Now, just relax.

Just relax.

There we go.

Good gorilla.

Oh, come on.

You can't be impotent. Now, come on over here.

Here, look at that. Go ahead. Jump right in there.

Come on, come on. Now, not like that.

Ah, gorilla.

Look, we're trying to improve you.

Come on.

Relax now.

Relax and you can feel into it.

You'll love it.

Now, come on, big fella. Just try it and you'll love it. Come on over here.

Just relax.

Come on.

Here we go. Here we go.

Come on now.

Come on, big boy. What do you think you're doing?

Look, I'm sorry about that. I'm going to show this hairy ape how it's done.

Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy.

What's he doing now?

What's he doing now?

What's he doing here?

You and

your

goddamn ideas.

What do you know about the sacrifices that have to be made for art?

Cut the cameras.

It's bullshit.

Well, you can never tell.

Perhaps we've really discovered something here today.

My brother should have his head examined for even introducing you to such a

worm. He's not a director.

He's a half -baked yo -yo.

He thinks he's God's gift to the silver screen.

Then how come you've worked for him for such a long time?

That's none of your goddamn business.

Oh, Monica, be reasonable.

I can handle it.

Bob thinks it's okay.

Bob's crazy.

Besides, he doesn't even know what kind of films I've been making all these

years. He's so wrapped up writing those fuckbooks, he doesn't see life the way

it really is.

Inga, you can't go.

Jeffrey Montclair will ruin you.

He'll make you sorry for the day you ever thought of being an actress.

Inga, don't go.

But I have to.

Okay, then. But don't come running back to me when he's through with you. Don't

look to me to help you again.

You're a dumb little bitch from the country, and I feel sorry for you.

You're not sorry for me.

You're sorry for yourself.

Because you think the same thing that happened to you is going to happen to

It's that mirror of the past you talk about all the time.

But I'm not... I'm going to get trapped like you did. I'm bullshit.

Traps are just what they are and everybody falls into them. And you're no

exception.

I'm sorry you feel that way, Monica.

But this may be my one and only chance to prove myself.

Well, then go.

Then get the hell out!

Angry and upset.

Inga set out to take a long walk before seeing Geoffrey Montclair later that

afternoon. She knew that Monica had an earlier filming date with him.

In his famous Don Juan, Lord Byron once wrote, In her first passion, woman

loves a lover.

In all the others, all she loves is love.

But Geoffrey Montclair knew that Byron knew nothing of the Taurian woman.

for the constant, steady, loyal Taurean woman will generally not have sex with

any man unless she loves him.

On the schedule for the afternoon was the director's creation for the Gemini

couple, who we knew frequently reflected upon the duality of their true natures

during intercourse.

Hidden to the world, and sometimes even their true soulmates, are the inner

thoughts and fantasies that stir them deeply.

Monica was the best that Geoffrey Montclair had.

She possessed the ability to get into a role as easily as stepping into a new

pair of shoes.

No position she was given to illustrate caused her any problem.

Even as she worked today, her head was still filled with the fury of possibly

losing Inga, the same way that she herself had gotten lost many, many years

Head to toe and toe to head mark the heavenly bodies of the star -filled

In his poetic nature, the director seeks out the quiet rhythms of the universe

in his attempt to reveal the basic truths to his audience, to his

indeed to all humanity.

Three, two, one.

Happiness and fulfillment through the study of the positions of the stars was

one of Geoffrey Montclair's aims.

The zodiac sign of Leo, the lion, mating with Ares, the ram, with such loving

and passionate rapture, was the same in his mind as the biblical passage of the

lion lying down with the lamb.

Even Masters and Johnson would agree here with our director.

When the Leo woman mates with the Aries male, she should always assume the

uppermost position.

Otherwise, her need to rule, control, and dominate might be frustrated.

The director's fascination with the Kama Sutra and the mystic orient saw in this

act the very force of primeval creation, the yin -yang, the relation of day to

night and the coupling together of opposites, the sky, the earth, the in as

opposed to the out, the up, the down.

In this basic act of love, he felt he had actually captured the essence of

time's life force.

He prided himself in knowing that his art was perhaps one of its kind.

He was the Leonardo da Vinci of the cinema, 500 years ahead of his time.

Oh. Oh.

of those rough scenes, though.

Yes, I bet.

It's the last scene of a movie he's been working on for a long time.

And he said I had the right face for it. Is this the paradise sequence?

Yeah.

Hello?

I'd like to speak to the mayor.

Inga's father.

Never mind who this is.

Just tell him I have information about his daughter.

Hello?

It doesn't matter who this is.

I just found out that your darling, precious little daughter is going to

lead role in a cheap porno film.

This director I know sold her a bill of goods about...

Her representing truth, beauty, and innocence.

Good. I thought you'd agree.

Okay, then.

Here's all the information you'll need.

When Bob learned of Monica's telephone call to Inga's father... He persuaded

Inga not to show up for the Paradise sequence.

Monica was then given the part she had always been promised.

But the two undercover agents sent by Inga's father didn't know anything as

arrived at the director's studio to take Inga home.

You said those two guys you hired for the hippie parts would be here by now.

Yeah, they just went down the hall to the bathroom.

But I went over the parts the way you wanted.

Oh, good.

You must not think of your nakedness.

You must completely relax.

Forget completely who you are, where you come from.

You are the spirit of my special muse.

Simply live the moment with me.

This enchanted moment.

who bring into reality the dreams and mysteries that have puzzled mankind from

the beginning of recorded time.

Paradise.

Birth.

Dig?

So, when I touch your shoulders like this, I want you to

grunt like this.

Do you understand, my child?

No, no, harder. Like this.

That's it.

My God, I think she's got it.

What's the gun for?

Aha. You have recognized the ultimate symbol of creation, of man's prowess.

The gun.

Down this long channel of darkness, a silver blob of hot metal comes,

bursting forth, just like God.

My audience will achieve an emotional orgasm when its thunder bursts forth

in the dark and movie houses of the world. They will stand as one and

Jeffrey Montclair has done it again!

I know my art.

Your art is supreme.

Yes.

We should get started now.

Places, everyone.

Now listen to me carefully.

When Monica grunts and I finish saying my lines, I want you to send those two

hippie fellows you have out there bursting through the door when I yell,

Did they pick up the stage guns? Everything is taken care of.

Okay. Now let's do this right.

Those two out there represent the inner conflicts of good and evil that keep our

spirits tied to this earthly realm.

When they fire their guns, we are released.

Now let's do it right the first time.

Eternal furies of the night be born and cast your magic light through the

darkness of the swinging door. Come forth and banish us forevermore.

That was great.

Did you get that?

Wow.

That was fantastic.

For posterity, folks.

Thank you.

Bring it back a little bit, please.

Thank you.

We were in the bathroom down the hall.

The shooting over or something?

Can we have a coffee break now?

shooting over oh my god is the shooting over i've just spent three thousand

dollars on this feature production and i've lost my leading man and you two

want to know if there's a coffee break after the director's death bob and inga

developed a deeper more lasting relationship while monica sought out and

work with another dedicated educational filmmaker

And no longer will Papa Mobutu search the ads of the show business trade

He has achieved prominence in the scientific and artistic world as the

gorilla in the annals of motion picture history, surpassing even the reputation

of his older brother, King Kong.