All language subtitles for Mork and Mindy S03E21 Mindy and Mork.DVDRip.NonHI.cc.en.PRMNT

Na-no, na-no!

What a morning to be late.

Oh, God.

Oh, I'd like to get
my hands on the guy

who invented the snooze alarm.

♪ Morning, morning... ♪

Oh, Min, let me help
you with those suckers.

Come on now,
hon. That's all right.

Isn't that lovely.

Heh-heh, here we are.

Thanks, Mork, but I was
trying to put the boot on.

Oh. I guess we start off the
day on the wrong foot, huh.

Well, Mind, I'm really famished.

I feel like Gandhi
at a McDonald's.

Come on, now.

I feel like I can eat
an aardvark's tongue.

Come on, now, Min.

Sorry, Mork. I'm production
coordinator on a new show today

and I've got to be at
the studio in 10 minutes.

Well, Min, you can
fix me a minute steak.

That'll give you nine
minutes to spare.

I'm afraid you're gonna have
to fix your own breakfast today

and maybe dinner too.

It might be another late night.

Min, Min, Min, Min.
Whoa. Red light, whoa.

Stop, kemosabe.

Listen.

You want moi to cook?

Yeah. You're a big Orkan now.

I think you can handle
yourself in the kitchen

and maybe cleaning
up around here too.

Min, Min, Min, I draw
the line right there.

I will not cook,
clean, or do windows.

I am man. Watch me sit.

Where'd you get that idea?

Robert Petrie, Jim
Anderson, and Archie Bunker.

Who?

Mr. Television.

Oh.

Hm, well, Mork,
that's a lot of bunk.

TV isn't real life.

Min, are you kidding?

Then Ricky really
doesn't love Lucy?

♪ Babalu, babalu ♪

Look, Mork, since
I've been working,

I just don't have enough time

to do all the things
around the house

so I'm gonna need your help.

All right, Min. Enlightened
Mork to the rescue.

Please don't make me
cook because I'll get thinner

than Ronald Reagan's
environmental budget.

Look, you traveled 200
million miles to get here,

I think that you can pour
yourself a bowl of cereal.

Listen, I gotta
run. I'll see ya later.

Don't wait up.

It might be another
late night. Bye.

B-B-Big kiss, Mindy.

She used to have
time for a big kiss,

now she doesn't even
got time to pucker.

Oh, Mind, I knew
you'd come... Ooh.

Is the lady of the
house at home?

Exidor.

Mork, is that you?

Hey, what are we doing
just standing here talking?

Come on in.

My, my, my, isn't
this a delightful home?

Don't rush me. I'll
get to the sales pitch.

Good morning, sir or madam.

We represent the
Exidor-to-door company,

exclusive distributors

of these thingamajigs.

I'm sorry, Exidor,

but I already have
a thingamajig.

All right, all right. I'll
tell him what it does.

And why?

Because this miracle
of modern technology

can do everything a maid can do

except steal the silverware.

And next week we're putting
out an attachment for that.

Amazing.

Yes. The revolutionary,
new maid-o-matic.

Exidor, does this really
make housework easier?

You don't want it?

I know, I know,
go to the hard sell.

You buy this gizmo,

or you'll never see
your wife and kids again.

I'm not married.

We have an
attachment for that too.

Maybe I should buy this,

'cause Mindy says I
should be helping her

with the cooking
and the cleaning.

What? Did you hear that, boys?

Ha-ha-ha-ha. The skirt's
pushing him around.

No, she isn't.

Is. Isn't.

Is. The vote is
12 to 1 against ya.

Well, look, I guess she is,

but all I wanted to do was
make housework easier.

Mork.

Mork, you whimpering washrag.

Pull yourself together.

Who wears the
pants in this house:

you or the tomato? Well,

she does.

What?

Well, this man's
had enough, though.

I'm not going to let
her push me around,

because I'm going to be the
best little wifey Mindy ever had.

But I do draw the
line at motherhood.

Hola.

No. Mindy no en casa.

Gracias. Adiós, muchacha.

Boy, housework is a snap.

I don't know what Erma Bombeck's
kvetching about all the time.

Let's see.

Oh, here we go.

Oh.

Oh, look. Brown and
black, Mindy's favorite colors.

She won't mind.
Keep the bugs away.

Let's see. What do we do now?

I think I'll make a little
salad for my breadwinner.

There we are.

Instructions: "put
vegetables inside."

All right, let's see.

Hey.

Ho.

Hey.

Let's see. "Turn on."

Hey! Wait a minute. Wait.

Vesuvius!

Abandon ship.

Quit cracking.

Take the boys, abandon ship.

Abandon ship.

What is going on?

Jiminy Crickets.

What in the world is
going on here, Mork?

God, what are you trying to do,

qualify for a federal
disaster loan?

Oh, Mr. Bickley, I'm sorry.
I was just trying to help.

I mean, it looked so easy
at the time I was doing it,

and all of a sudden
"blammo" like Krypton.

It's wang, bang, flang...

Well, what did you expect?
Housework isn't easy.

It's miserable,
backbreaking, repetitive,

unrewarding, nonpaying labor.

Look what it's done to my hands.

That's horrible, they look
like lobsters at a tanning salon.

Quick, call Madge.

Mindy made it
always look so easy.

Well, it isn't.

And my wife
didn't like it either.

She wanted to get a job,
but I laid down the law.

I told her her job
was to cook the meals

and take care of the house.

After that, we never
had another problem.

Everything was doke-okey, right?

Wrong. She left me.

I still miss the
static on the TV

when she'd vacuum under my feet.

I don't want Mindy to leave me.

Then you better call her

and find out how to run
this place before it's too late.

I'll do that right away.

Five, four, three,

two, cue music, and...

Welcome to Talk to Dr. Lincoln,

a unique call-in program
to help you, the viewer,

with your problem.

And now here's eminent local
psychologist Dr. Joni Lincoln.

Good afternoon.

For the next half hour
I'll be taking your calls

and hopefully helping you
get your life back on the track.

Our number's on your home
screen and our lines are open

so please call in.
You'll be glad you did.

And it's a lot cheaper
than an office visit.

Oh, there's our
very first caller.

Hello, this is Dr. Lincoln.

Dr. Lincoln, I have
been so paranoid lately,

it seems like everybody
is trying to get me.

I see, and what is
your name, ma'am?

Think you can trick me, huh?

What kind of a fool
do you think I am?

Moving right along.

Let's try another call.

Hello. This is Dr. Lincoln.

Uh, hi, this is Mork.

Good afternoon, Mork.
How can I help you?

Yes, may I talk to Mindy
McConnell, please?

I'll kill him.

Mork, she's a little
busy right now.

That's all right. I'll wait.

I have a canasta game going.

Mork, look, I have
to keep this line open.

Could Mindy call you back later?

Kay-o.

That's live television for you.

Let's try another call.

Hello. This is Dr. Lincoln,
and your first name is?

A Short memory. It's Mork.

Mork, I'm... I'm sorry,

but this line is in use
for people with problems.

Oh, I know that,

and I've got a real
doozy going here.

Mindy can take care of it

if I could just talk to her
for a millisecond. Please.

What is it, Mork?

Mind, is that you? I
can barely hear ya, hon.

Can you hear me now?

Yes, Mind, and
you look stunning.

How do you get zucchini
stains off the ceiling?

Why don't I help you
with that when I get home?

Bye, Mork.

You're not gonna wave and
throw me a kiss like Dinah?

What does that mean, Min?

Be home early.

And by the way, I love the show,

especially the... Is
that a Princess Phone?

And now a word from our sponsor.

Oh, Dr. Lincoln,
I'm so embarrassed.

I apologize. It'll
never happen again.

You must think I'm
some kind of a loon.

No, Mindy, but I might suggest

that this Mork come
see me at the clinic.

What is it now, Mork?

Oh. Mr. Sternhagen.

Yes, I'll be right
in to see you.

Oh.

I knew it was too good to last.

Mork. Mork.

Mork.

There's my lovely,
mobile career woman.

Hello, hun. We're going
to have dinner on the table

before you can
say "Poppin' Fresh."

Say hi... "Poppin' fresh."
- -too late.

Oh, look at this.

I got a little "bun in
the oven" for you here.

Ooh. Hot potato. Hot potato.

Nothin' says lovin' like
somethin' from the oven.

Mork, I almost
lost my job today.

Oh, hon, I know work was
such a hard, hard thing today.

Why don't you just sit
down now and relax?

You sit down and
rest those tired bones

and tootsies of
yours. No problem.

Mork, I don't want to sit down.

No, no, no, no, no.
There's your little pipe.

Here's the sports page.

I cut a few recipes out.
I hope you don't mind.

And we got your
little slippers here.

Little teddies on...

You don't know what a
hard day it's been for me,

hon, trying to put a waxy,
yellow buildup on that floor.

Mork, I don't want
to talk about the floor.

I want to talk about what
happened at work today.

Work, work, work.

That's all you
type A personalities

ever want to talk about.

You don't know a thing about me.

Nothing to worry about by me.

You almost got me fired today.

You embarrassed me on
the air, and I just want you

to promise that it
will not happen again.

So this is the thanks I get
for slaving over a hot stove

and working my
fingers to the bone?

I'm wasting the best
bleebs of my life.

Oh, no.

Mork.

Look, Mork, calm down.

No, you calm down!

Here I am in this
house, cooped up all day,

vicariously living
through your exploits...

Okay, Mork. Look. Forget...

Forget I ever mentioned
anything about it.

We'll sit down, we'll
have a nice little dinner,

just the two of us.

You want your
dinner, you eat out.

Mork, come on.
You're overreacting.

No. Don't touch me.
I have a headache.

And always remember, Carol,

that one day your
children will be parents too.

And that's when
they'll get theirs.

Bye now.

Well, that wraps
up another session.

So until next time,
this is Dr. Joni Lincoln

hoping that all your
problems are little ones.

A-Are we still on
the air, Mindy?

Oh. Oh, no, it's over.

I mean, "wrap." It's wrapped.

Thank you.

Oh. I'm sorry, Dr. Lincoln.

I really am. I don't know
where my mind has been lately.

Oh, Mindy, are you all right?

You've been forgetting cues,

and whenever the
phone rings you cringe.

I know I'm not supposed to
bring my problems to work with me,

but it's the guy I live with.

Mork.

Well, he's just not adjusting
very well to my working.

Oh. I'm sorry.

I don't mean to be
laying this all on you.

Oh, please, everybody
does. It's part of the job.

Lay it on me.

Well, it's just that
the two of us...

Well, I-I don't know,

everything got turned
around somehow.

And it was pretty
weird to begin with.

I see, well, Mindy,
in any household,

when a woman begins a career,

there are always going
to be some adjustments.

I know, I went through
it with my family.

Yeah, but Mork has overadjusted.

In one day he went from
being Ozzie to Harriet.

Could be an identity problem.

Well, Mork shares
in the housework,

but I want to help with
those responsibilities too.

I don't want him waiting
on me hand and foot.

How long have you
been living together?

About three years.

Is your physical
relationship compatible?

Uh...

Well, I-I guess that all depends
on what you call "compatible."

I-I mean, um, well,
we kiss and you know,

but we don't... You know.

But... But we're compatible.

Well, you know, Mindy,
in any relationship

it takes more than one
person to make a problem,

and we can talk about a number
of ways to help improve things,

but right now I'd rather
you didn't say a word.

Why?

Because I think
we're still on the air.

I'll be right in,
Mr. Sternhagen.

Hi, Mork.

Oh, it's you. How nice.

Uh, did you happen
to see the show today?

No, Min, I had an
exhausting afternoon

at the daycare center.

We had an artistic problem.

There was a crayon
lodged in Mrs. Fowler's ear.

Well, listen. Today I
had a long conversation

with Dr. Lincoln
about our problems.

Problems? We have no problems.

We're as happy as two moths
and a porch light. You know:

Oh, Mork, no, we're not.

Oh, yes, we are.

And I'm part of the problem.

Oh, Min, you're... Oh, Min. Min.

You don't know what it's
like to carry this all alone.

I thought I was an
anchor around your neck.

I thought I was a hangnail
on the finger of ambition.

Oh, Min, how can we save

the shambles of
this relationship?

Oh-h-h. Well, Dr. Lincoln
suggested some ways

that would help
us to relate better.

They're really more like games.

Games? Why didn't you say
so? I'll be shirts and you be skins.

No.

No, they're not
those kind of games.

Um, actually, they're
more like exercises in trust.

Okay, let's start with a
real simple one, all right?

All right. All right.

You stand over here.
Just stand straight.

Now I want you to
fall, and I'll catch you.

Sounds reasonable.

All right, I'll go
along with this,

but if it doesn't
work, I'm walking.

No, that's what it's about.
You've got to trust me.

Come on, fall. I
promise I'll catch you.

You promise? I promise.

All right.

Custer.

Nice catch, Min.

Mork, you were
supposed to fall backwards.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

I'm gettin' the
hang of it now, Min.

Okay. Something's
not right here.

Yeah. While you're
still in one piece,

let's try something else

that might help us
understand each other.

Um, it's called role reversal.

It's where I play
you, and you play me,

and then we act out a scene
from our normal, daily life.

You mean, I'll be Mindy
and you'll be Mork?

There are laws
against that, Min.

I think it could only help.

Well, all right.

Give me till tomorrow
morning to shave my legs.

I have to pluck my eyebrows
and buy some things.

I'll be back.

Morning, Mind.

Morning, Mork.

Oh, gosh, I'm going
to be late again.

Oh, Min, Min, Min, Min.

Will you fix me
breakfast, huh, huh, huh?

Will ya? Will ya? Will ya?

I'm so hungry I could eat Bebo.

Mork,

haven't got time right now.

I'm too busy being
a butch career girl.

Hey, wait a minute.
That's hittin' below the belt.

Stop it. You're gonna
stretch out my boots.

These are your boots?

Had to stuff socks in the front.

Oh, Mork, you're so
talented and handsome,

and you have such
great taste in clothes.

Hey, wait a minute,
I never said that.

It would be nice if
you did once in a while.

Mork, Mork, where
are my car keys?

Did you bury them again?

Well, I locked them in the
jeep so they wouldn't get lost.

Did I do good? Did I,
did I, huh, huh, huh?

Do I get a gold star?

Absolutely not.

Shazbot.

Mork, come, sit down.

Sense of impending doom.

Here we go. Let's
sit down and talk.

Not on your face.

Now, Mork, Mork...

Mork, I realize you're an alien

that doesn't know his
elbow from his raznick...

Yes, but I never
would have done it

without your patience
and understanding.

Oh, really?

Hello.

It's Mr. Sternhagen,
my boss at the station.

Yes, Mr. Sternhagen.

Yes, I'm still here.

Yes. I have a
little jeep problem.

You're right. That's no
reason to lose my job.

Thank you. Bye, Mr. Sternhagen.

Oh.

Good news?

I have to be at the
station in 10 minutes,

or I'm off the air forever.

You'll just have to
fix yourself breakfast,

and I'll be home
before midnight.

But, but, Min.

Wait a minute, Mork. Wait...

Don't leave without
giving me a big...

Kiss?

I've been ignoring
you, haven't I?

Well, who can blame you?

I mean, I didn't realize I
was that hard to live with.

As a roommate,
I'm no John Ritter.

Oh, Mork, you're terrific.

Different, but terrific.

Oh, Mork, our
lives are changing,

and we just have
to do a better job

of changing with them.

Yeah, you're right.

From now on, I'm only
going to do my share.

Housework is really hard.

Yeah. Ow, ow, ow.

And I'm gonna try not to
use so much of myself up

at the office that I have
nothing left to give to you.

See, I feel better already.

We're gonna have
to promise each other

that we'll always tell each
other how we're feeling.

You got it.

I feel happy now.

Well, that's good.

I feel happier.

Oh, really? Now it
feels like almost joy.

Oh, oh, it is joy.

Oh, goodbye,
joy. Hello, ecstasy!

Mork calling Orson.
Come in, Orson.

Mork calling Orson.
Come in, Orson.

Hello, anybody home?

Ah, Mork. I love what
you've done with your hair.

Oh, no, Orson, sir.

It's me, Mindy McConnell.
Remember me?

I was here a few
months ago with Mork...

Silence. Where's Mork?
What's happened to his report?

Oh. Well, sir, you see,

Mork and I started sharing
all our responsibilities lately,

so here I am.

But if you'd really rather
speak to Mork, I could...

Just get on with it.

Okay.

See, my report

is really about my
and Mork's relationship.

Again?

He told you about it?

What did he say?

Everything.

Well, he couldn't have, sir,

because a good relationship is
always changing and growing.

But if a relationship
works well,

why would you want to change it?

Well, sometimes
there's no choice, I mean,

you never know what hurdles
life is gonna place in front of you,

and each one is a test
of how much you care.

And sometimes even if you don't
have trouble getting over them,

your partner may.

So you either stop and help
them over, or you go on alone.

Did I do all right?

Not bad for an Earthling.

Oh, that's big of ya, sir.

No, I didn't mean "big."

I meant that's good
of you, sir. Good, um...

Maybe we can do this
again sometime soon.

Don't press your luck.

Right. Well, um,

this is Mindy McConnell
signing off for Mork.

Um, n...

Na-no, na-no.