All language subtitles for Mork and Mindy S03E17 Mork and Mindy Meet Rick and Ruby.DVDRip.NonHI.cc.en.PRMNT

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,903 --> 00:00:04,583 Na-no, na-no! 2 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:41,678 Okay, let's see. 3 00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:43,580 "Well, Grandma, that about wraps things up here. 4 00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:44,948 "Mork is fine. 5 00:01:44,972 --> 00:01:46,183 I should say, 'Mork is Mork.' 6 00:01:46,207 --> 00:01:48,507 You never know what he's going to do next." 7 00:01:50,677 --> 00:01:52,155 It's terrible! 8 00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:53,923 "But I'm think I'm about to find out." 9 00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:55,825 Oh, Min, oh, Min, it's so terrible! 10 00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:57,427 Min, I could... Min, I could hold my breath 11 00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:59,429 until I turn chartreuse. 12 00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:00,730 That's blue, Mork. 13 00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:02,199 Hold your breath until you turn blue. 14 00:02:02,223 --> 00:02:04,468 No, no, we Orkans hold our breath until we turn chartreuse, 15 00:02:04,492 --> 00:02:06,369 just before we reach critical mass and explode, 16 00:02:06,393 --> 00:02:07,826 you know, like Scanners? 17 00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:11,341 Well, please don't explode. 18 00:02:11,365 --> 00:02:13,064 I just vacuumed. Ar-ar. 19 00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:15,912 Oh, Mork... Oh, ho, ho. Whoa, bang. 20 00:02:15,936 --> 00:02:18,115 What are you so upset about? 21 00:02:18,139 --> 00:02:19,149 All right. 22 00:02:19,173 --> 00:02:20,417 Well, I met these two singers 23 00:02:20,441 --> 00:02:22,252 named Rick and Ruby, and they drove all the way 24 00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:23,420 out here from Akron. 25 00:02:23,444 --> 00:02:25,288 And, Min, they got out here, 26 00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:26,856 and the guy that hired them fired them 27 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,120 just because Ruby's rabbit died seven months ago. 28 00:02:30,050 --> 00:02:31,060 What? 29 00:02:31,084 --> 00:02:32,795 Wait a minute. 30 00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:35,265 They fired her because she's pregnant? 31 00:02:35,289 --> 00:02:37,300 Really? Who'd do such an insensitive, 32 00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:38,735 sexist thing like that? 33 00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:40,737 Remo. Oh. 34 00:02:40,761 --> 00:02:42,239 That explains it. 35 00:02:42,263 --> 00:02:43,840 Since when has Remo had entertainment 36 00:02:43,864 --> 00:02:44,841 at the restaurant? 37 00:02:44,865 --> 00:02:45,975 I don't know, Min. 38 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:46,976 He... I guess he wants to try 39 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,445 and improve business somehow. 40 00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:49,846 And then they came and he fired them. 41 00:02:49,870 --> 00:02:51,448 And now they... They don't have any money, 42 00:02:51,472 --> 00:02:53,583 they don't have any place to live, no place to go, Mind. 43 00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:54,817 You mean they're stranded? 44 00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,386 Oh, yes. Oh, God. 45 00:02:56,410 --> 00:02:57,621 No wonder you're so upset. 46 00:02:57,645 --> 00:02:58,921 That makes me mad. 47 00:02:58,945 --> 00:03:00,390 I mean, so what if she's pregnant? 48 00:03:00,414 --> 00:03:01,458 If a woman can work, 49 00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:03,160 she should be allowed to work. 50 00:03:03,184 --> 00:03:05,495 Mind, you wouldn't turn someone like that out on the street, 51 00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:07,631 would you, Mind? Of course not. 52 00:03:07,655 --> 00:03:09,999 What? No way would I turn them out. 53 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,591 She says it's okay! Come on in! 54 00:03:22,803 --> 00:03:24,581 Mind, meet Rick and Ruby. 55 00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:25,848 Hi. 56 00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:28,685 We're sure glad you're takin' us in. 57 00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:29,919 Really nice of you. 58 00:03:29,943 --> 00:03:31,254 I mean, we're total strangers 59 00:03:31,278 --> 00:03:32,422 and everything. 60 00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:34,157 For all you knew, we could have been 61 00:03:34,181 --> 00:03:35,425 a couple of real ding-dongs. 62 00:03:37,518 --> 00:03:40,397 I guess I just lucked out. 63 00:03:40,421 --> 00:03:42,332 Or even worse, we could have been robbers 64 00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:43,766 or ax murderers 65 00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:46,291 or game-show hosts or something. 66 00:03:48,462 --> 00:03:49,839 Tell you the truth, we're not really 67 00:03:49,863 --> 00:03:51,341 all that trustworthy, 68 00:03:51,365 --> 00:03:53,343 even, ourselves. 69 00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:55,800 W-we're not sure this baby is mine. 70 00:04:00,841 --> 00:04:02,419 Ricky, could you give me 71 00:04:02,443 --> 00:04:04,087 a little hand with this do you think? 72 00:04:04,111 --> 00:04:05,922 Oh, sure, honey. It's so heavy. 73 00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:07,123 Whew. 74 00:04:07,147 --> 00:04:08,491 Thanks a million. 75 00:04:08,515 --> 00:04:11,127 Hey, anytime, sweetheart. 76 00:04:11,151 --> 00:04:12,362 Why don't we go take a nap? 77 00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:13,463 I'm beat. 78 00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:15,064 Oh, let me show you to your room. 79 00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:16,099 This way, please. 80 00:04:16,123 --> 00:04:17,500 Oh, pardon me, pardon me. 81 00:04:17,524 --> 00:04:18,568 It's right in there. 82 00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:19,569 Mork! 83 00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,271 That's my bedroom. 84 00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:22,505 I know, Min, 85 00:04:22,529 --> 00:04:24,006 but they both can't sleep on the couch. 86 00:04:24,030 --> 00:04:25,842 Ruby will sleep on the couch, and you and Rick... 87 00:04:25,866 --> 00:04:27,009 Right through there. 88 00:04:27,033 --> 00:04:28,612 Oh, thank you. 89 00:04:28,636 --> 00:04:30,347 Well, don't you worry. The next three months 90 00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:31,914 are just gonna fly right by. 91 00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,383 Ar-ar-ar-ar. 92 00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:34,718 Three months? 93 00:04:34,742 --> 00:04:36,786 It's gonna be so much fun, you know. 94 00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:39,522 Sharing beauty hints and stuff. 95 00:04:39,546 --> 00:04:41,858 I just think it's so great to live in a country 96 00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:43,793 where you can actually have hair like this 97 00:04:43,817 --> 00:04:45,828 and still be allowed to reproduce. 98 00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:58,040 And I'm telling you 99 00:04:58,064 --> 00:04:59,809 that not hiring Ruby because she's pregnant 100 00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,511 is sexist. 101 00:05:01,535 --> 00:05:03,647 And I'm telling you, the only reason you're saying that 102 00:05:03,671 --> 00:05:05,671 is because you're a woman. 103 00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:09,919 That remark is sexist. 104 00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:11,421 I'm not a sexist. 105 00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:12,944 I'm a man. 106 00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:15,592 Jeanie, get over here. 107 00:05:15,616 --> 00:05:18,328 Get some water on table eight, would you? 108 00:05:18,352 --> 00:05:20,352 Go stuff your manicotti. 109 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:26,336 Even she's down on me. 110 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,271 I don't know what's goin' on here. 111 00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:30,707 Look, my dad taught me 112 00:05:30,731 --> 00:05:32,175 that pregnant women 113 00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:34,311 should be taken care of. 114 00:05:34,335 --> 00:05:35,978 They shouldn't work. 115 00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,079 I respect women. 116 00:05:37,103 --> 00:05:39,148 Well, if you respect women so much, 117 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,050 why don't you let Ruby make the choice? 118 00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:43,353 I'm telling you, Remo, you are a real chauvinist. 119 00:05:43,377 --> 00:05:45,188 Yeah, Remo, you're a real chauvinist. 120 00:05:45,212 --> 00:05:47,324 What do we mean by that, Min? 121 00:05:47,348 --> 00:05:49,559 Well, in Remo's case, it's a general attitude 122 00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:51,928 that women are inferior. 123 00:05:51,952 --> 00:05:53,396 Yeah. 124 00:05:53,420 --> 00:05:54,397 Well, they aren't. 125 00:05:54,421 --> 00:05:56,098 Oh, I know that, Min, I mean, 126 00:05:56,122 --> 00:05:57,634 they sew better, they cook better, 127 00:05:57,658 --> 00:05:59,803 they clean better. 128 00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:01,960 I'll talk to you about this later. 129 00:06:03,364 --> 00:06:06,242 You know, Remo's always been like this. 130 00:06:06,266 --> 00:06:08,177 Whenever we played king of the hill, 131 00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:09,912 he was always the king. 132 00:06:11,238 --> 00:06:13,037 I was always the hill. 133 00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:16,675 Sexist. 134 00:06:18,345 --> 00:06:19,989 Mind, I think I understand what's going on. 135 00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:21,358 One second. 136 00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:22,459 Now, Remo, 137 00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:23,860 now, imagine the worst thing 138 00:06:23,884 --> 00:06:25,895 that could possibly happen. Let's say you hire Ruby, 139 00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:27,831 and the little lady's up there singing onstage, 140 00:06:27,855 --> 00:06:29,332 and all of a sudden she hits a high note 141 00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:33,236 and we all realize that she's not singing. 142 00:06:33,260 --> 00:06:35,739 And that couldn't happen because she's only 7 months pregnant. 143 00:06:35,763 --> 00:06:37,774 Yeah. And even if she does give birth onstage, 144 00:06:37,798 --> 00:06:40,499 do you realize people would pay to come and see her do that? 145 00:06:41,535 --> 00:06:42,679 Mork, listen, 146 00:06:42,703 --> 00:06:44,914 I don't think pregnant women should work. 147 00:06:44,938 --> 00:06:46,349 That's the way I feel about it, 148 00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:47,950 I'm the one that has to live with it 149 00:06:47,974 --> 00:06:49,151 and that is that. 150 00:06:49,175 --> 00:06:50,453 Oh, "that is that." 151 00:06:50,477 --> 00:06:51,821 That's it. 152 00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:53,590 Well, Remo, I'm sure there are 153 00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:55,291 a lot of women's groups around Boulder 154 00:06:55,315 --> 00:06:57,394 who'd love to hear about the way you feel. 155 00:06:57,418 --> 00:06:58,828 I'm gonna make a few phone calls. 156 00:06:58,852 --> 00:07:01,431 I'll just bet you'll have a picket line outside. 157 00:07:01,455 --> 00:07:03,165 Fine. That's your right. 158 00:07:03,189 --> 00:07:05,229 Just make sure none of 'em are pregnant. 159 00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:10,740 Min, what a chauvinist thing to say! 160 00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:12,074 Yeah. 161 00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:13,743 I'll get a couple of men's groups together 162 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,745 and we'll be out there tomorrow morning with you. 163 00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:17,447 Well, you can cheer us on from the sidelines 164 00:07:17,471 --> 00:07:18,815 and keep us supplied with coffee 165 00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:21,350 and those little sissy sandwiches. 166 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,193 Don't eat at DaVinci's! 167 00:07:31,217 --> 00:07:33,095 Don't eat at DaVinci's! 168 00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:34,196 I don't believe this. 169 00:07:34,220 --> 00:07:36,198 They got half the town out here. 170 00:07:36,222 --> 00:07:38,234 Even Thelma Jenkins. 171 00:07:38,258 --> 00:07:40,470 I got a date with her tonight. 172 00:07:40,494 --> 00:07:42,138 Oh, great. 173 00:07:42,162 --> 00:07:44,262 Dinner and a cold shower again. 174 00:07:45,466 --> 00:07:47,043 You want to get rid of the pickets? 175 00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:49,345 You hire Rick and Ruby. 176 00:07:49,369 --> 00:07:52,181 I'm not gonna hire a helpless, pregnant woman. 177 00:07:52,205 --> 00:07:54,250 I'm standing on principle here. 178 00:07:54,274 --> 00:07:55,752 Remo, you're 27 years old. 179 00:07:55,776 --> 00:07:57,342 Why start now? 180 00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:01,090 Don't eat at DaVinci's. 181 00:08:01,114 --> 00:08:02,874 Don't... Whew! Lunch break. 182 00:08:05,586 --> 00:08:06,896 Boy, am I hungry. 183 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,131 I'd like three burritos and lots of ice cream. 184 00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:10,967 Well, at least we have one customer. 185 00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:12,702 Jeanie, would you...? 186 00:08:12,726 --> 00:08:14,303 Oops, sorry, 187 00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:16,072 but I'm on my lunch break too. 188 00:08:16,096 --> 00:08:18,307 I'll see you in an hour. 189 00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,176 Don't eat at DaVinci's. 190 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:21,945 Don't eat at DaVinci's. 191 00:08:21,969 --> 00:08:23,312 My own sister? 192 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:25,348 You know, I could be mad at that Mindy. 193 00:08:25,372 --> 00:08:28,150 Oh, why? She's just doing what she thinks is right. 194 00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:29,340 Ah. 195 00:08:32,312 --> 00:08:34,357 And here comes the cause of my problem. 196 00:08:34,381 --> 00:08:36,659 What are you doing on your feet walking around? 197 00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:38,316 Will you sit down? 198 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,352 Ha! 199 00:08:42,756 --> 00:08:44,467 Mork, what are you doing? 200 00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:46,836 We're picketing this place so people don't eat here. 201 00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,437 You crossed the picket line. 202 00:08:48,461 --> 00:08:50,039 If you had made sandwiches, 203 00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:52,503 I wouldn't be so fammed-out right now, for sure. 204 00:08:55,836 --> 00:08:57,179 I'm pretty hungry too. 205 00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:59,516 I'll have whatever he's having, okay? 206 00:08:59,540 --> 00:09:02,018 I'm sorry. We're all out of burritos and ice cream. 207 00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:03,853 Rats. 208 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:05,588 I don't believe this. 209 00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:06,856 I don't believe it. 210 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:07,857 Why don't we invite 211 00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:09,592 the whole picket line in here? 212 00:09:09,616 --> 00:09:10,793 Okay, 213 00:09:10,817 --> 00:09:13,018 but everybody's gonna have to go Dutch. 214 00:09:15,022 --> 00:09:17,066 Mindy, come on. 215 00:09:17,090 --> 00:09:19,610 Let's get together on this thing, huh? 216 00:09:20,027 --> 00:09:21,504 All right. 217 00:09:21,528 --> 00:09:23,773 Mork, you've heard their side, but you haven't heard mine. 218 00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:25,207 Try and be objective, all right? 219 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,076 Kay-o. Thanks. 220 00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:28,545 By the way, where's Rick? 221 00:09:28,569 --> 00:09:29,979 He's home asleep. 222 00:09:30,003 --> 00:09:31,447 He said this whole thing was my fault, 223 00:09:31,471 --> 00:09:33,572 so I should be the one to picket. 224 00:09:35,141 --> 00:09:36,318 Sounds fair to me. 225 00:09:36,342 --> 00:09:38,621 No, it doesn't! None of this is fair! 226 00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:40,423 Mindy, besides my feelings, 227 00:09:40,447 --> 00:09:41,758 this is a business. 228 00:09:41,782 --> 00:09:43,092 No one's gonna pay good money 229 00:09:43,116 --> 00:09:45,227 to see someone in her condition sing. 230 00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:46,495 He's got a point, Min. 231 00:09:46,519 --> 00:09:47,597 No, he doesn't. 232 00:09:47,621 --> 00:09:49,265 Her condition has nothing to do 233 00:09:49,289 --> 00:09:50,366 with her ability to sing! 234 00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:52,936 She's got a point, Remo. 235 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,704 Mork, I mean, 236 00:09:54,728 --> 00:09:56,706 besides risking 237 00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:57,840 losing my customers, 238 00:09:57,864 --> 00:09:59,542 I have to pay them a salary. 239 00:09:59,566 --> 00:10:01,544 If Mindy were in my place, she wouldn't do it. 240 00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:03,312 Min, would you pay them a salary? Of course. 241 00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:04,814 She said she'd pay them a salary, Remo. 242 00:10:04,838 --> 00:10:05,848 She's on. 243 00:10:05,872 --> 00:10:06,950 What? Hm. 244 00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:08,785 Hey, wait a minute, I didn't say... 245 00:10:08,809 --> 00:10:10,519 Oh, now, Min, I knew you'd do the right thing. 246 00:10:10,543 --> 00:10:12,555 You're always the right side. No, wait... 247 00:10:12,579 --> 00:10:13,656 Thanks a lot, Mindy. 248 00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:16,059 We could really use the money. 249 00:10:16,083 --> 00:10:17,961 Hold it. What I meant... 250 00:10:17,985 --> 00:10:20,063 Min, Min, Min, Min, you're not going back on your word? 251 00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:22,567 You're not gonna be a shiksa giver, are you? 252 00:10:24,557 --> 00:10:25,802 No. No. 253 00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:27,870 Okay, okay, I'll make a deal with you, Remo. 254 00:10:27,894 --> 00:10:30,439 If they chase away customers, I'll pay their salary, 255 00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:32,108 and if they don't, you pay it. 256 00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:33,175 Okay. Okay. 257 00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:34,343 You got it. Yeah. 258 00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:35,578 That's it. Not that big a deal. 259 00:10:35,602 --> 00:10:37,814 No. After all, this isn't Vegas. 260 00:10:37,838 --> 00:10:39,082 I mean, how much could it be? 261 00:10:39,106 --> 00:10:40,416 Yeah, much do they make, Remo? 262 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:41,417 Five hundred a week. 263 00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:42,807 Five... 264 00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:48,579 Five hundred... 265 00:10:49,616 --> 00:10:51,460 So? It's okay. 266 00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:52,461 It's all right, Remo, 267 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,730 because in the end, 268 00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:55,464 talent will out. 269 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:57,600 I want to talk to you about that talent. 270 00:10:57,624 --> 00:10:59,435 Do you know the name 271 00:10:59,459 --> 00:11:01,104 of their group? 272 00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:02,138 No. 273 00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:03,662 Ask her. 274 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:09,100 Ruby, 275 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:11,781 what do you call your group? 276 00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:13,237 The Stupids. 277 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:16,653 The what? 278 00:11:16,677 --> 00:11:18,387 The Stupids. 279 00:11:18,411 --> 00:11:19,622 See... 280 00:11:19,646 --> 00:11:21,223 See, what we do is we get up onstage 281 00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:23,960 and we act, like, real dumb. 282 00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:26,295 It's real hard, too. 283 00:11:26,319 --> 00:11:27,997 If you think that being stupid is easy, 284 00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:30,800 you really ought to try it sometime. 285 00:11:30,824 --> 00:11:32,957 Besides being stupid, what else do you do? 286 00:11:34,828 --> 00:11:36,605 We... sing songs 287 00:11:36,629 --> 00:11:38,997 that no one wants to hear. 288 00:11:40,633 --> 00:11:42,812 Well, don't most performers 289 00:11:42,836 --> 00:11:45,247 sing songs that people want to hear? 290 00:11:45,271 --> 00:11:47,216 Well, yeah. 291 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,019 They do if they're smart. 292 00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:52,055 But we're The Stupids, see? 293 00:12:11,331 --> 00:12:13,642 Why aren't Rick and Ruby on the stage? 294 00:12:13,666 --> 00:12:15,666 Well, I think they're in the kitchen changing, Min. 295 00:12:18,504 --> 00:12:20,783 You're not gonna believe this. 296 00:12:20,807 --> 00:12:23,519 Rick and Ruby are back there arm-wrestling. 297 00:12:23,543 --> 00:12:24,821 Oh, no. Arm-wrestling? 298 00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,623 That's unfair. It's two against one. 299 00:12:27,647 --> 00:12:29,959 Well, they got into an argument over what to call the baby 300 00:12:29,983 --> 00:12:32,128 and the winner gets to pick the name. 301 00:12:32,152 --> 00:12:34,130 Okay, I'm ready to go. 302 00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:35,898 Let me tell you something, baby, 303 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:38,757 you may be strong, but I got it up here. 304 00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:42,571 God, what are all these people doing here? 305 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:43,706 I don't know. 306 00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:46,075 The food must be pretty good, huh? 307 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,643 Let me tell you something else, 308 00:12:47,667 --> 00:12:49,912 no matter how many times you pin me, 309 00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:52,615 we're not gonna name the baby "Trigger." 310 00:12:52,639 --> 00:12:53,883 It's a good name. 311 00:12:53,907 --> 00:12:56,152 It works for either a boy or a girl. 312 00:12:56,176 --> 00:12:57,887 Listen, if you guys are late one more time, 313 00:12:57,911 --> 00:12:59,922 I'm taking the station wagon and going back to Akron. 314 00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:01,758 Now, do you want me to introduce you or not? 315 00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:03,359 Of course, Raoul. 316 00:13:03,383 --> 00:13:05,850 He thinks we're stupid or something. 317 00:13:09,055 --> 00:13:10,332 Okay. 318 00:13:10,356 --> 00:13:13,002 Is it okay if we play a little flamingo guitar? 319 00:13:18,064 --> 00:13:20,442 Ladies and gentlemen, The Stupids. 320 00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,611 The name was their idea. 321 00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:30,987 Okay. 322 00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:33,656 One, two, three... 323 00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:35,958 Wait. I have an idea. 324 00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:37,693 Why don't we just sort of take a vote 325 00:13:37,717 --> 00:13:39,929 and let these people decide what to name the baby? 326 00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:42,598 No way, José. We're in Colorado. 327 00:13:42,622 --> 00:13:44,982 These people will go for "Trigger." 328 00:13:45,591 --> 00:13:46,702 Excuse me, 329 00:13:46,726 --> 00:13:49,438 but I'm not paying you to bicker. 330 00:13:49,462 --> 00:13:50,739 In fact, I may not be the one 331 00:13:50,763 --> 00:13:51,941 that pays you at all. 332 00:13:51,965 --> 00:13:53,542 Just sing. 333 00:13:53,566 --> 00:13:54,610 God, we don't tell him 334 00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:56,412 how to run his restaurant. 335 00:13:56,436 --> 00:13:57,479 Okay, 336 00:13:57,503 --> 00:14:00,283 one, two, three... 337 00:14:00,307 --> 00:14:02,484 I really am sorry, you know. 338 00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:05,087 My mind just keeps wandering 339 00:14:05,111 --> 00:14:07,089 and that's not so bad 340 00:14:07,113 --> 00:14:08,291 but then it comes back again. 341 00:14:08,315 --> 00:14:10,048 I'm sort of stuck with it. 342 00:14:10,984 --> 00:14:12,594 One, two, three, four. 343 00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:18,634 ♪ When you were A young boy ♪ 344 00:14:18,658 --> 00:14:21,370 ♪ Did you have a puppy ♪ 345 00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:24,006 ♪ That always followed You around ♪ 346 00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:26,542 ♪ Doot do-doot Doot doot do-doot ♪ 347 00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:28,644 ♪ Well I'm gonna be ♪ 348 00:14:28,668 --> 00:14:30,735 ♪ As faithful as a puppy ♪ 349 00:14:31,872 --> 00:14:33,415 ♪ I'm never gonna ♪ 350 00:14:33,439 --> 00:14:34,939 ♪ Let you down ♪ 351 00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,954 ♪ 'Cause it gets stronger ♪ 352 00:14:37,978 --> 00:14:40,278 ♪ Like a river flows ♪ 353 00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:43,926 ♪ It gets bigger baby ♪ 354 00:14:43,950 --> 00:14:47,029 ♪ And heaven knows ♪ 355 00:14:47,053 --> 00:14:49,065 ♪ Ooh I love you ♪ 356 00:14:49,089 --> 00:14:52,301 ♪ My oh my ♪ 357 00:14:52,325 --> 00:14:54,136 ♪ River deep ♪ 358 00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:55,738 ♪ Mountain high ♪ 359 00:14:55,762 --> 00:14:57,740 ♪ Yeah yeah yeah ♪ 360 00:14:57,764 --> 00:14:59,675 ♪ If I lost you ♪ 361 00:14:59,699 --> 00:15:01,565 ♪ Would I cry ♪ 362 00:15:02,936 --> 00:15:05,181 ♪ Oh I love you baby ♪ 363 00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:08,472 ♪ Baby baby baby ♪ 364 00:15:10,944 --> 00:15:12,521 ♪ I love you baby ♪ 365 00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:13,689 ♪ Like a robin ♪ 366 00:15:13,713 --> 00:15:15,791 ♪ Loves to sing ♪ 367 00:15:15,815 --> 00:15:17,393 ♪ I love you baby ♪ 368 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:18,594 ♪ Like the flowers ♪ 369 00:15:18,618 --> 00:15:20,696 ♪ Of the spring ♪ 370 00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:22,498 ♪ I love you baby ♪ 371 00:15:22,522 --> 00:15:23,832 ♪ Like a school boy ♪ 372 00:15:23,856 --> 00:15:25,834 ♪ Loves his pet ♪ 373 00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:27,469 ♪ I love you baby ♪ 374 00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:28,771 ♪ River deep ♪ 375 00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:30,973 ♪ Mountain high ♪ 376 00:15:30,997 --> 00:15:32,775 ♪ Ooh I love you ♪ 377 00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:34,498 ♪ My oh my ♪ 378 00:15:36,303 --> 00:15:37,846 ♪ River deep ♪ 379 00:15:37,870 --> 00:15:39,215 ♪ Mountain high ♪ 380 00:15:39,239 --> 00:15:41,183 ♪ Yeah yeah yeah ♪ 381 00:15:41,207 --> 00:15:43,185 ♪ If I lost you ♪ 382 00:15:43,209 --> 00:15:45,076 ♪ Would I cry ♪ 383 00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:48,958 ♪ Ooh I love you baby ♪ 384 00:15:48,982 --> 00:15:51,649 ♪ Baby baby baby ♪ 385 00:16:05,999 --> 00:16:07,509 That was terrific. 386 00:16:07,533 --> 00:16:08,577 That was just great. 387 00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:10,413 I-I-I gotta admit it. I was wrong. 388 00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:12,381 Thanks a lot, Remo. 389 00:16:12,405 --> 00:16:14,205 I have a small announcement. 390 00:16:15,442 --> 00:16:17,753 I'm having a baby. 391 00:16:17,777 --> 00:16:19,455 Ruby, these people may be hicks, 392 00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:21,857 but even they can see you're gonna have a baby. 393 00:16:21,881 --> 00:16:24,026 No, no, you don't understand. 394 00:16:24,050 --> 00:16:26,795 I'm having a baby... 395 00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,586 now. 396 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:31,500 Now? Sorry. 397 00:16:31,524 --> 00:16:32,901 Oh... 398 00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:48,384 Just my luck. 399 00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:49,385 My first full house, 400 00:16:49,409 --> 00:16:51,087 and it's two-cent beer night. 401 00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:52,221 I got a lead singer 402 00:16:52,245 --> 00:16:53,456 doggin' it in the hospital 403 00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:54,623 with a little bundle of bliss 404 00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,147 named "Trigger." 405 00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:01,864 I don't think spending the day in the hospital 406 00:17:01,888 --> 00:17:03,265 because you've had a baby 407 00:17:03,289 --> 00:17:04,833 is exactly "dogging it." 408 00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,369 Well, she lied to me. 409 00:17:06,393 --> 00:17:08,004 Told me she was seven months pregnant, 410 00:17:08,028 --> 00:17:09,571 turns out she's nine months. 411 00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:11,807 She started counting when she found out she was pregnant. 412 00:17:11,831 --> 00:17:14,143 Anyone could make that mistake. 413 00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:15,577 I don't know whose fault it is. 414 00:17:15,601 --> 00:17:17,046 I just know I need a singer. 415 00:17:17,070 --> 00:17:19,315 Well, I can do it. I sing all the time in the shower. 416 00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:21,183 Even upside down. 417 00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:23,019 Thanks a lot, Mork, but I need more than a singer 418 00:17:23,043 --> 00:17:24,153 who performs in the shower. 419 00:17:24,177 --> 00:17:25,287 I even sing in the bathtub, 420 00:17:25,311 --> 00:17:26,889 but it sounds different. It's more like: 421 00:17:28,748 --> 00:17:29,758 Wait a minute, 422 00:17:29,782 --> 00:17:31,227 what's wrong with us? 423 00:17:31,251 --> 00:17:32,661 Ruby can't perform. 424 00:17:32,685 --> 00:17:33,729 Well, so, what? 425 00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:35,664 I sing. Raoul sings. 426 00:17:35,688 --> 00:17:37,033 I don't know. 427 00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:39,001 She's the only one I ever heard sing. 428 00:17:39,025 --> 00:17:40,636 I can sing. I wanna be a big star. 429 00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:41,904 Fats Domino move over. 430 00:17:41,928 --> 00:17:44,462 All I need is six guys to help me move Fats over. 431 00:17:46,032 --> 00:17:47,243 Mork, let me handle this. 432 00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:49,412 Now, Ruby's a pretty lady 433 00:17:49,436 --> 00:17:50,612 and a wonderful singer, 434 00:17:50,636 --> 00:17:52,148 but let's get something straight. 435 00:17:52,172 --> 00:17:53,549 I'm the talent of the group. 436 00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:55,251 So just introduce us, okay? 437 00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:57,119 I don't know if I trust a guy 438 00:17:57,143 --> 00:17:58,220 who plays a pink guitar 439 00:17:58,244 --> 00:18:00,456 with a beak. 440 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:01,823 Might as well introduce him, 441 00:18:01,847 --> 00:18:03,147 you don't have any other choice. 442 00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:10,299 Ladies and gentlemen, here's that wonderful group 443 00:18:10,323 --> 00:18:11,567 you've been waiting for: 444 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:13,469 The Stupid. 445 00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:21,832 ♪ Wee ooh ♪ 446 00:18:25,738 --> 00:18:27,671 ♪ Wee ooh ♪ 447 00:18:32,412 --> 00:18:33,556 ♪ Ooh ♪ 448 00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:35,424 ♪ Wah ♪ 449 00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:36,625 ♪ Ooh ♪ 450 00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:39,161 Sure leaves you wanting more, doesn't it? 451 00:18:39,185 --> 00:18:40,829 I thought you said you could sing! 452 00:18:40,853 --> 00:18:43,065 Well, I am singing. I'm going, uh... 453 00:18:43,089 --> 00:18:45,667 ♪ Wee ooh ♪ 454 00:18:45,691 --> 00:18:47,536 Shouldn't there be something between "wee ooh" 455 00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:48,870 and "wee ooh?" 456 00:18:48,894 --> 00:18:50,372 Well, yeah, but that's Ruby's part. 457 00:18:50,396 --> 00:18:53,675 But she just had a baby. What are you, stupid? 458 00:18:53,699 --> 00:18:56,178 I knew this wasn't gonna work. 459 00:18:56,202 --> 00:18:58,180 Folks, uh... 460 00:18:58,204 --> 00:18:59,415 We don't have a lead singer, 461 00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:01,984 so maybe we ought to just close up for tonight, huh? 462 00:19:02,008 --> 00:19:04,353 Wait, I-I could sing! I could sing Mr. DaVinci, 463 00:19:04,377 --> 00:19:06,021 let me try, please. 464 00:19:06,045 --> 00:19:08,324 You have never sung in front of an audience before. 465 00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:10,092 What do you call a rubber duck and a washcloth? 466 00:19:10,116 --> 00:19:12,528 Chopped liver? Now, come on! 467 00:19:12,552 --> 00:19:13,695 I don't know about this. 468 00:19:13,719 --> 00:19:15,331 I'm not used to working with amateurs. 469 00:19:15,355 --> 00:19:16,565 I don't know about it either, 470 00:19:16,589 --> 00:19:19,056 but your "doo wahs" ain't sellin' diddly. 471 00:19:20,527 --> 00:19:22,304 Ladies and gentlemen... 472 00:19:22,328 --> 00:19:24,795 I'm not responsible for this. 473 00:19:26,132 --> 00:19:27,876 Hi. How are you? 474 00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:29,211 Thank you. Thank you very much. 475 00:19:29,235 --> 00:19:30,446 Nice to be here. Where you from? 476 00:19:30,470 --> 00:19:31,947 What do I do? 477 00:19:31,971 --> 00:19:33,449 Hey, for you, sweetheart. 478 00:19:33,473 --> 00:19:35,417 Ha-ha-ha-ha. Thank you very much. 479 00:19:35,441 --> 00:19:37,253 I'd like to sing something very special 480 00:19:37,277 --> 00:19:38,854 in the key of X, boys. 481 00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:40,756 Let's play that funky music, 482 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:42,079 white boy. 483 00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:45,227 And a-one, and a-two, 484 00:19:45,251 --> 00:19:46,529 and a-three. 485 00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:50,854 Well, all right. 486 00:19:58,431 --> 00:19:59,908 Well, all right! 487 00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:01,843 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 488 00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:04,268 I'm really sorry. I don't know the words to that one. 489 00:20:05,905 --> 00:20:06,915 What song do you know? 490 00:20:06,939 --> 00:20:08,417 Well, I mean, all the way through? 491 00:20:08,441 --> 00:20:10,752 Yeah, that'd be nice, then we could all finish together. 492 00:20:10,776 --> 00:20:12,020 Well, um... 493 00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:13,889 Well, I-I-I know this one. 494 00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:15,991 Uh, well, "This Heart Is Closed For Alterations?" 495 00:20:16,015 --> 00:20:17,326 Wow! I can't believe it. 496 00:20:17,350 --> 00:20:19,027 That's our theme song! 497 00:20:19,051 --> 00:20:20,028 Whoo! 498 00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,397 Here's Ruby's hat. 499 00:20:21,421 --> 00:20:22,998 Ruby's hat. Thank you. 500 00:20:23,022 --> 00:20:24,366 Thank you very much, 501 00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:26,790 ladies and gentlemen. Privilege to be here once again. 502 00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:30,239 Thank y'all, thank y'all. 503 00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:34,798 ♪ This heart is closed ♪ 504 00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:38,969 ♪ For alterations ♪ 505 00:20:40,873 --> 00:20:42,551 ♪ And the management ♪ 506 00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:45,276 ♪ Extends apologies ♪ 507 00:20:46,646 --> 00:20:48,657 ♪ I'm sorry if ♪ 508 00:20:48,681 --> 00:20:51,159 ♪ I've inconvenienced you ♪ ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ 509 00:20:51,183 --> 00:20:53,161 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪ ♪ I'll make it right ♪ 510 00:20:53,185 --> 00:20:54,830 ♪ Before I'm through ♪ 511 00:20:54,854 --> 00:20:57,032 ♪ But for a little while ♪ 512 00:20:57,056 --> 00:20:59,390 ♪ Just bear with me ♪ 513 00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:02,993 ♪ This heart is closed ♪ 514 00:21:04,631 --> 00:21:07,097 ♪ For alterations ♪ 515 00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:10,579 ♪ So please excuse ♪ 516 00:21:10,603 --> 00:21:13,304 ♪ The rubble and debris ♪ 517 00:21:14,674 --> 00:21:16,719 ♪ You see I've reached ♪ 518 00:21:16,743 --> 00:21:19,054 ♪ A few decisions ♪ 519 00:21:19,078 --> 00:21:22,491 ♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪ ♪ And made a few revisions ♪ 520 00:21:22,515 --> 00:21:24,493 ♪ ooh ooh ooh ♪ ♪ I think will make ♪ 521 00:21:24,517 --> 00:21:27,418 ♪ A new man out of me ♪ 522 00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:32,000 Giz bum vasa do lum ♪ 523 00:21:32,024 --> 00:21:34,069 ♪ Rizbat key beba she buz Batee nemem ♪ 524 00:21:34,093 --> 00:21:36,238 ♪ Nimrot va sooveedem namur ♪ 525 00:21:36,262 --> 00:21:38,073 ♪ Ruz be devish mim ♪ 526 00:21:38,097 --> 00:21:39,975 ♪ Ruz bah deevem bum badeem ♪ 527 00:21:39,999 --> 00:21:41,365 ♪ Azo nomum ♪ 528 00:21:42,735 --> 00:21:44,780 ♪ I see that I've been ♪ 529 00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:47,115 ♪ Takin' out on you ♪ 530 00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:49,017 ♪ The changes that ♪ 531 00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:50,753 ♪ She put me through ♪ 532 00:21:50,777 --> 00:21:52,321 ♪ You're gonna see ♪ 533 00:21:52,345 --> 00:21:53,922 ♪ Some changes ♪ 534 00:21:53,946 --> 00:21:55,413 ♪ Made of me ♪ 535 00:21:56,749 --> 00:21:58,427 ♪ This heart is closed ♪ 536 00:21:58,451 --> 00:22:00,562 ♪ This heart is closed ♪ 537 00:22:00,586 --> 00:22:03,799 ♪ For alterations ♪ 538 00:22:03,823 --> 00:22:05,668 ♪ This heart is closed ♪ 539 00:22:05,692 --> 00:22:07,436 ♪ This heart is closed ♪ 540 00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:10,127 ♪ For alterations ♪ 541 00:22:12,198 --> 00:22:13,542 Thank y'all. Thank you. 542 00:22:23,343 --> 00:22:24,953 Thank y'all. 543 00:22:24,977 --> 00:22:26,054 Bless you. Bless you. 544 00:22:26,078 --> 00:22:27,389 Mork, I never dreamed 545 00:22:27,413 --> 00:22:29,090 that you knew how to sing like that. 546 00:22:29,114 --> 00:22:30,326 I can't believe you got in front 547 00:22:30,350 --> 00:22:32,561 of all these people you never met before 548 00:22:32,585 --> 00:22:35,230 and cool as a cucumber, just sang your heart out. 549 00:22:35,254 --> 00:22:36,632 Talk about your nerves of steel. 550 00:22:36,656 --> 00:22:39,000 Oh, thanks, Mind, I'm glad we finally understood each other. 551 00:22:39,024 --> 00:22:41,203 Mind, I have a little question I'd like to ask you. 552 00:22:41,227 --> 00:22:43,339 Min, what's it mean when your legs get kind of weak 553 00:22:43,363 --> 00:22:45,474 and you feel queasy and you kind of black out? 554 00:22:45,498 --> 00:22:47,476 It sounds like you're gonna faint. 555 00:22:47,500 --> 00:22:48,577 Oh, good, 556 00:22:48,601 --> 00:22:50,334 'cause I thought I was gonna have a baby. 557 00:23:01,914 --> 00:23:03,425 Mork calling Orson. 558 00:23:03,449 --> 00:23:05,327 Come in, Orson. 559 00:23:05,351 --> 00:23:07,496 Mork calling Orson. 560 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:09,698 Come in, Orson. 561 00:23:09,722 --> 00:23:11,099 Mork calling Orson. 562 00:23:11,123 --> 00:23:12,534 Come in, your big daddy-ship. 563 00:23:12,558 --> 00:23:13,935 I hear you, Mork. 564 00:23:13,959 --> 00:23:15,270 Why the cigar? 565 00:23:15,294 --> 00:23:17,806 Well, sir, I have reason to be proud, your stogieness. 566 00:23:17,830 --> 00:23:19,742 This week, I helped an Earthling get a job. 567 00:23:19,766 --> 00:23:21,142 Oh, isn't that nice? 568 00:23:21,166 --> 00:23:22,210 Ha-ha-ha. 569 00:23:22,234 --> 00:23:24,012 Congrats and hazzam, Mork. 570 00:23:24,036 --> 00:23:26,147 Oh, thank you, sir. I'm especially proud, sir. 571 00:23:26,171 --> 00:23:28,350 This earthling was being discriminated against. 572 00:23:28,374 --> 00:23:29,651 She was, as they say on Ork, 573 00:23:29,675 --> 00:23:30,786 "with test tube." 574 00:23:30,810 --> 00:23:32,354 Oh, yes. Yeah. 575 00:23:32,378 --> 00:23:34,089 Earth pregnancy. Mm-hm. 576 00:23:34,113 --> 00:23:35,758 You explained it to me once. 577 00:23:35,782 --> 00:23:37,860 Yeah, sir, it starts off with the birds and the bees 578 00:23:37,884 --> 00:23:39,628 and ends up with pickles and ice cream. 579 00:23:39,652 --> 00:23:40,962 One moment, Mork, Sir. 580 00:23:40,986 --> 00:23:43,131 Are you saying Earthlings can't work 581 00:23:43,155 --> 00:23:44,566 in that enlarged condition? 582 00:23:44,590 --> 00:23:45,734 No, of course they can, sir. 583 00:23:45,758 --> 00:23:47,135 It never stopped you. 584 00:23:47,159 --> 00:23:48,470 I wouldn't know. 585 00:23:48,494 --> 00:23:49,671 I'm not pregnant. 586 00:23:49,695 --> 00:23:51,373 Oh, come on, now, sir. Come on, now. 587 00:23:51,397 --> 00:23:53,409 You could be about to hatch an entire village. 588 00:23:53,433 --> 00:23:54,610 Ar-ar-ar! 589 00:23:54,634 --> 00:23:55,744 Get on with it, Mork! 590 00:23:55,768 --> 00:23:57,279 Yes, indeedy-do-da. 591 00:23:57,303 --> 00:23:59,848 Basically sir, I realized the expectant mother 592 00:23:59,872 --> 00:24:01,383 knows what's best for her. 593 00:24:01,407 --> 00:24:03,151 Sounds reasonable. 594 00:24:03,175 --> 00:24:04,352 It is her pregnancy. 595 00:24:04,376 --> 00:24:05,754 Ah, you won the magic prize, 596 00:24:05,778 --> 00:24:07,188 your perceptive pudginess. 597 00:24:07,212 --> 00:24:10,125 Most Earthlings think this is the end of a woman's career, 598 00:24:10,149 --> 00:24:12,394 when, actually, it's just a pregnant pause. 599 00:24:12,418 --> 00:24:14,029 Until next week, sir, na-no, na-no. 600 00:24:14,053 --> 00:24:15,898 Say good night, Bebo. 601 00:24:15,922 --> 00:24:17,999 That's close. 40919

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