Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,374 --> 00:00:07,617
Captain Nirvana!
2
00:00:07,641 --> 00:00:08,907
Captain Nirvana!
3
00:00:11,145 --> 00:00:12,289
What took you so long?
4
00:00:12,313 --> 00:00:14,458
Well, the pet was a
little hard to handle.
5
00:00:14,482 --> 00:00:15,562
It bites.
6
00:00:16,583 --> 00:00:18,650
Bite me and I'll
remove your cheeks.
7
00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:20,986
Leave us alone.
8
00:00:22,123 --> 00:00:24,134
Who do you think you are?
9
00:00:24,158 --> 00:00:25,969
I mean, you... You
break down my door,
10
00:00:25,993 --> 00:00:28,238
you mess up my house, you
kidnap my best friend and...
11
00:00:28,262 --> 00:00:30,840
And now you threaten my cheeks?
12
00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,784
I mean, you're
pushing me too far.
13
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:35,612
Well, if you think
you're pushed too far,
14
00:00:35,636 --> 00:00:37,047
my job's on the line.
15
00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:39,082
Oh, I never wanted
to be in the military
16
00:00:39,106 --> 00:00:40,484
in the first place.
17
00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:43,509
For one thing, you have to
wear these drab uniforms.
18
00:00:46,280 --> 00:00:48,747
I don't know. I mean, who
could look good in this?
19
00:00:50,751 --> 00:00:52,684
The bass player from Kiss?
20
00:00:56,157 --> 00:00:58,135
Will you get in the cage?
21
00:00:58,159 --> 00:00:59,736
Wait, wait... Wait a minute.
22
00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,739
Uh, uh, maybe you
and I could be friends.
23
00:01:02,763 --> 00:01:03,840
Friends?
24
00:01:03,864 --> 00:01:05,708
Yeah. Like, if we were friends,
25
00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:07,244
we'd do nice things
for each other,
26
00:01:07,268 --> 00:01:09,379
like, uh, I might lend
you my best purse,
27
00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:12,371
and you might not kill me.
28
00:01:14,141 --> 00:01:15,785
Well, it's a cute idea,
29
00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:17,421
but I don't think
it'll catch on.
30
00:01:17,445 --> 00:01:18,821
No, no, wait! Think about it.
31
00:01:18,845 --> 00:01:21,325
I'll bet you deep down
inside, you and I are a lot alike.
32
00:01:22,249 --> 00:01:23,282
I doubt it.
33
00:01:27,354 --> 00:01:29,699
Uh, what do you
plan to do with me?
34
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:31,601
Well, I haven't
made up my mind yet,
35
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:34,771
but right now I need you
for bait for your master.
36
00:01:34,795 --> 00:01:37,407
He is not my master.
37
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:39,309
And how do you even
know he's gonna come here?
38
00:01:39,333 --> 00:01:40,843
Well, I don't know.
It's just a hunch.
39
00:01:40,867 --> 00:01:42,579
But I got a feeling
he's got a yen for you.
40
00:01:44,004 --> 00:01:45,515
It's called friendship,
41
00:01:45,539 --> 00:01:47,317
but obviously you
wouldn't understand.
42
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:49,719
Well, whatever. But what is it?
43
00:01:49,743 --> 00:01:50,887
You've never had a friend?
44
00:01:50,911 --> 00:01:52,344
Well, I...
45
00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:54,824
I once felt something
46
00:01:54,848 --> 00:01:57,316
for a man named Torga
from the planet Lepto.
47
00:01:58,252 --> 00:02:00,051
Torga from Lepto?
48
00:02:01,722 --> 00:02:02,954
You know him?
49
00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:06,336
No.
50
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:07,759
Just the name.
51
00:02:09,363 --> 00:02:10,373
Oh.
52
00:02:10,397 --> 00:02:12,409
Well, anyway, he was...
53
00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:14,377
Well, he was a
wonderful kind of guy.
54
00:02:14,401 --> 00:02:16,580
I mean, he had
long, beautiful hair
55
00:02:16,604 --> 00:02:18,748
and a flowing red beard.
56
00:02:18,772 --> 00:02:22,185
He was... He was,
well, so nice and warm.
57
00:02:22,209 --> 00:02:24,387
Really? Whatever
happened to him?
58
00:02:24,411 --> 00:02:26,111
I had him made into a jacket.
59
00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:31,060
And there's something
about Mork too.
60
00:02:31,084 --> 00:02:32,895
Of course, he wouldn't
make a very good jacket,
61
00:02:32,919 --> 00:02:34,364
but I like him anyway.
62
00:02:34,388 --> 00:02:35,999
Well, if you like him
so much, why don...?
63
00:02:36,023 --> 00:02:37,167
Why don't you just let him go?
64
00:02:37,191 --> 00:02:39,469
Oh, well, it's
strictly business.
65
00:02:39,493 --> 00:02:43,173
You see, after I get all
the information out of him,
66
00:02:43,197 --> 00:02:44,707
maybe I won't destroy him.
67
00:02:44,731 --> 00:02:47,366
Maybe I'll take him home with
me and donate him to the zoo.
68
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:51,355
Yeah, but if you do that,
you might as well kill him.
69
00:02:51,738 --> 00:02:52,971
Okay.
70
00:02:54,708 --> 00:02:57,120
Now, will you get in the cage?
71
00:02:57,144 --> 00:02:59,664
I'm not getting in that cage.
72
00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:02,025
How would you like
to get into something
73
00:03:02,049 --> 00:03:04,216
a little more comfortable,
like thumbscrews?
74
00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:08,064
If you need me,
I'll be on my perch.
75
00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:16,105
Mindy? Where are you?
76
00:03:16,129 --> 00:03:18,375
Min! Min!
77
00:03:21,268 --> 00:03:23,348
"While you were out." How nice.
78
00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:27,717
"Dear Orkan swine, we
have captured your pet.
79
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:29,619
"If you value your
life, give yourself up.
80
00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:31,321
"Otherwise, we'll
realign her head,
81
00:03:31,345 --> 00:03:34,824
"steam-clean her thighs,
and rotate her limbs.
82
00:03:34,848 --> 00:03:37,394
Yours truly, Nirvana."
83
00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:39,028
Now, just remain
calm. Deep breathing.
84
00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:42,699
Remain calm.
85
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:44,601
Mork. Nelson!
86
00:03:44,625 --> 00:03:46,203
Oh, Nelson, they got Mindy!
87
00:03:46,227 --> 00:03:47,537
I was gonna get
her and rescue her,
88
00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:48,672
but now it's too late!
89
00:03:48,696 --> 00:03:50,773
It's my fault! It's my fault!
90
00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:53,976
Hey, easy, easy, easy.
91
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:55,000
That's better.
92
00:03:57,137 --> 00:03:59,182
Nice outfit you got there.
93
00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:00,317
Pretty boss threads.
94
00:04:00,341 --> 00:04:03,041
I told Mindy you'd be back.
95
00:04:04,378 --> 00:04:07,357
You're not gonna believe this.
96
00:04:07,381 --> 00:04:09,080
You know what she said?
97
00:04:12,152 --> 00:04:14,964
She said that you...
98
00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:18,735
were captured
99
00:04:18,759 --> 00:04:21,070
by three gorgeous women
100
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:22,772
from another planet.
101
00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:29,613
By the way, where were you?
102
00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:31,948
I was captured by gorgeous
women from another planet.
103
00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:37,776
You crazy nut!
104
00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:40,790
Where's Mindy?
105
00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:42,925
She was captured by
three gorgeous girls...
106
00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,261
From another planet!
107
00:04:46,587 --> 00:04:48,498
I get it! I get it!
108
00:04:48,522 --> 00:04:50,367
The two of you are
in this together, right?
109
00:04:50,391 --> 00:04:51,534
No, no, no.
110
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:52,569
Nelson, no!
111
00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:54,003
It's true! They captured me,
112
00:04:54,027 --> 00:04:55,405
and they took me
to their spaceship.
113
00:04:55,429 --> 00:04:56,640
Then they forced me to undress
114
00:04:56,664 --> 00:04:58,375
and sit in a hot
tub with all of them.
115
00:04:58,399 --> 00:04:59,743
A hot tub!
116
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:04,403
I get it.
117
00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:07,773
Candid Camera, right?
118
00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:11,557
I heard it was coming back on.
119
00:05:12,846 --> 00:05:15,458
Okay, Allen Funt,
120
00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:17,382
come out wherever you are.
121
00:05:19,219 --> 00:05:21,453
Oh, you're too much.
122
00:05:22,523 --> 00:05:25,490
Well, goodbye, Mork.
123
00:05:26,893 --> 00:05:28,327
Goodbye, Mr. Funt.
124
00:05:29,996 --> 00:05:32,809
Let me know when I'm on.
125
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,199
Hi, Mom.
126
00:05:35,636 --> 00:05:38,169
Three gorgeous
girls from another...
127
00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:51,394
Mork!
128
00:05:51,418 --> 00:05:53,963
Min! Shh!
129
00:05:53,987 --> 00:05:55,732
You shouldn't have come here.
130
00:05:55,756 --> 00:05:56,966
I couldn't leave you alone.
131
00:05:56,990 --> 00:05:58,435
Oh, but Mork. I'm
only one person.
132
00:05:58,459 --> 00:06:00,370
If they catch you, the
whole world is in danger.
133
00:06:00,394 --> 00:06:01,871
I'm gonna get you
out of here, and if not,
134
00:06:01,895 --> 00:06:03,406
I've got a backup
plan. What is it?
135
00:06:03,430 --> 00:06:06,576
Remember how I told you that
the Necrotons are biodegradable.
136
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,411
They can only last
on Earth for 24 hours,
137
00:06:08,435 --> 00:06:10,469
and after that, well, bing!
138
00:06:11,972 --> 00:06:14,317
And by my calculations, they
only have a few minutes left.
139
00:06:14,341 --> 00:06:15,418
Yeah? Yeah.
140
00:06:15,442 --> 00:06:16,820
Well, all we have
to do is just stall.
141
00:06:16,844 --> 00:06:18,977
Hiya, toots. Hiya, boots.
142
00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:23,360
Well, I see my plan worked.
143
00:06:23,384 --> 00:06:25,895
I am executive timber.
144
00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:28,052
I hope you get
executive termites.
145
00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:30,767
Not nice.
146
00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:32,268
All right.
147
00:06:32,292 --> 00:06:33,970
I surrender. Let Mindy go.
148
00:06:33,994 --> 00:06:35,405
Ha! Not a chance.
149
00:06:35,429 --> 00:06:36,773
But we made a bargain.
150
00:06:36,797 --> 00:06:38,162
So sue me.
151
00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:43,234
There's something so
nice about omnipotence.
152
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,672
Ew!
153
00:06:52,446 --> 00:06:54,023
What's wrong with him?
154
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:56,926
Uh, he's... He's got
something caught in his throat,
155
00:06:56,950 --> 00:06:58,828
and he'll die
unless you help him.
156
00:06:58,852 --> 00:06:59,879
Oh, I need his brain.
157
00:06:59,903 --> 00:07:01,063
F.
158
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:03,433
Oh... Oh, I don't
know what you did,
159
00:07:03,457 --> 00:07:04,697
but you saved me.
160
00:07:07,961 --> 00:07:09,839
Enough of your
cheap Orkan tricks.
161
00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:11,808
Now, get in the cage
before I forget I'm a lady.
162
00:07:11,832 --> 00:07:14,110
Uh, all right.
163
00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:17,179
I didn't want to do this, but
according to cosmic rules,
164
00:07:17,203 --> 00:07:19,982
and those dictated by
Prime Minister Fluffy,
165
00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:21,951
I hereby challenge
you to a holotecker.
166
00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:24,353
Ha! Sissy stuff.
167
00:07:24,377 --> 00:07:26,055
I mean, if you
really want a duel,
168
00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:27,990
let's go all the way.
169
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,859
The Battle of the Rose.
170
00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:32,161
Uh-uh. Not the
Battle of the Rose.
171
00:07:33,186 --> 00:07:34,464
What's the Battle of the Rose?
172
00:07:34,488 --> 00:07:36,566
The greatest mental
challenge in the universe, Min.
173
00:07:36,590 --> 00:07:38,468
Those with the strongest
will get to keep the rose.
174
00:07:38,492 --> 00:07:41,827
This will be easier than
Bobbing for Martians.
175
00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:50,046
All right, who starts?
176
00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:51,503
I'll flip you for it.
177
00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:53,205
Whoa!
178
00:07:53,740 --> 00:07:54,740
Ugh!
179
00:07:56,209 --> 00:07:58,529
Captain Nirvana seems
to have won the toss.
180
00:07:59,245 --> 00:08:00,757
He has elected to receive.
181
00:08:00,781 --> 00:08:02,892
It's time to begin the game
with a play-by-play now.
182
00:08:02,916 --> 00:08:04,449
Five yards this way.
183
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:08,512
Good luck to the both of you.
184
00:09:25,265 --> 00:09:27,410
Ha-ha! You're pretty
hot stuff, but I won.
185
00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:29,111
I've got the rose.
186
00:09:29,135 --> 00:09:31,581
Ha-ha! But I won.
You're out of air and time.
187
00:09:31,605 --> 00:09:32,849
Four, three, two, one.
188
00:09:32,873 --> 00:09:35,585
Ha-ha! You're gone. Adiós.
189
00:09:35,609 --> 00:09:38,855
Huevos rancheros,
albóndigas, and anon.
190
00:09:38,879 --> 00:09:41,290
What are you talking about?
191
00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:44,561
Well, you should
have deteriorated, but...
192
00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:46,829
You're still here. You
only had 24 hours.
193
00:09:46,853 --> 00:09:50,299
Oh, those were Necroton hours.
194
00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:51,935
Oh, excuse me.
195
00:09:51,959 --> 00:09:53,937
Roughly how long
is that on Earth?
196
00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:56,305
Nine hundred years.
197
00:09:56,329 --> 00:10:00,309
Boy, if I'd known that, I
would have paced myself.
198
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:19,796
Oh, come on, Min. Cheer up.
199
00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:22,131
Hey, I'll give you a ride.
200
00:10:22,155 --> 00:10:26,368
♪ It was only a girl
In a gilded cage ♪
201
00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:27,536
Mork.
202
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,739
Sorry, Min. Stop
trying to cheer me up.
203
00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:31,240
Yeah, I know.
204
00:10:31,264 --> 00:10:33,704
It's kind of hard to
frolic in the face of doom.
205
00:10:34,601 --> 00:10:36,479
You know, I've been
thinking about all the things
206
00:10:36,503 --> 00:10:38,481
that have happened to
me since I've met you.
207
00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:39,749
Well, one thing for sure,
208
00:10:39,773 --> 00:10:41,618
I never thought I'd end
up sitting in a birdcage
209
00:10:41,642 --> 00:10:44,809
waiting for my brains to
be sucked out by Necrotons.
210
00:10:47,681 --> 00:10:50,649
Well, look on the bright side.
You still have your health.
211
00:10:55,522 --> 00:10:57,800
Mork, you know, you...
You didn't have to come back
212
00:10:57,824 --> 00:11:00,036
and risk your life to
save me, but you did.
213
00:11:00,060 --> 00:11:01,037
Thanks.
214
00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:02,271
Yeah, but I kind of botched up.
215
00:11:02,295 --> 00:11:03,806
Because if I'd
done the right thing,
216
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,390
you'd be safe in your own home
when they destroyed the Earth.
217
00:11:09,335 --> 00:11:11,514
I guess we've had a full life.
218
00:11:11,538 --> 00:11:14,572
I only wish I had gotten
to meet Anson Williams.
219
00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:23,026
Mork, there's something that
I've been wanting to tell you
220
00:11:23,050 --> 00:11:24,426
for a long time,
but I just couldn't.
221
00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:26,863
Oh, what is it, Min?
222
00:11:26,887 --> 00:11:28,497
Well, one time when
you weren't home,
223
00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:31,556
I put on your spacesuit.
224
00:11:35,929 --> 00:11:37,209
The helmet too?
225
00:11:38,398 --> 00:11:40,043
Boots and all.
226
00:11:40,067 --> 00:11:41,077
Are you mad?
227
00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:43,146
No.
228
00:11:43,170 --> 00:11:45,730
I have a confession
to make to you too.
229
00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:50,019
Well, one time when
you weren't home,
230
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:51,353
I held your blow dryer
231
00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:53,737
and jumped up and
down on your bed.
232
00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:57,093
Are you mad?
233
00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:58,961
No.
234
00:11:58,985 --> 00:12:01,586
I guess we've done it all.
235
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:08,604
Okay, Morky, it's time
to get your brain sucked.
236
00:12:08,628 --> 00:12:09,772
Oh!
237
00:12:09,796 --> 00:12:11,262
Goodbye, Mork.
238
00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:20,850
Goodbye, brains.
239
00:12:20,874 --> 00:12:22,952
Hello, Larry.
240
00:12:22,976 --> 00:12:24,821
Yaddy-yaddy, warden!
241
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:25,822
Oh, Mork!
242
00:12:25,846 --> 00:12:28,057
Top of the world, Min!
243
00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:29,848
Top of the world, Mindy!
244
00:12:31,351 --> 00:12:33,996
Oh. Is this thing gonna hurt?
245
00:12:34,020 --> 00:12:35,364
Oh, no. I won't feel a thing.
246
00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:37,266
No, no. I meant me.
247
00:12:37,290 --> 00:12:39,001
Well, you tremendously.
248
00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:40,502
Oh.
249
00:12:40,526 --> 00:12:42,166
Comfy? What?
250
00:12:43,163 --> 00:12:44,774
It would have been
easier if you'd talked.
251
00:12:44,798 --> 00:12:45,942
But since we can't trust you,
252
00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:47,210
we'll have to
take out your brain
253
00:12:47,234 --> 00:12:48,945
and squeeze out the information.
254
00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:50,168
What?
255
00:12:51,037 --> 00:12:52,281
Sutra.
256
00:12:52,305 --> 00:12:53,972
Activate the extractor.
257
00:12:59,846 --> 00:13:01,457
All right, I'll
take it from here.
258
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:02,792
Prepare the ship for takeoff.
259
00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:04,582
And check to see if
the cookies are done.
260
00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:09,020
Oh, Mork, Mork.
261
00:13:10,824 --> 00:13:13,591
Boxing have been
good to me, Howard.
262
00:13:14,594 --> 00:13:16,928
Oh! It's too late.
263
00:13:18,698 --> 00:13:20,643
Oh! It's not in there.
264
00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:22,333
I think it in my ear.
265
00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:29,252
Whew! Uh, that was close.
266
00:13:29,276 --> 00:13:31,553
Oh, I'm so glad
you're all right.
267
00:13:31,577 --> 00:13:34,323
Well, I... I thought you
wanted to suck out my brains,
268
00:13:34,347 --> 00:13:36,392
put them in that little jar
over there for the winter.
269
00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:37,894
Oh, no, Mork.
270
00:13:37,918 --> 00:13:39,561
That was just to
pretend for those two...
271
00:13:39,585 --> 00:13:41,030
Those two barracudas.
272
00:13:41,054 --> 00:13:44,133
You see, ever since I danced
the tango with you, well,
273
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:46,735
Well, I felt something
I never felt before.
274
00:13:46,759 --> 00:13:48,004
What was that?
275
00:13:48,028 --> 00:13:49,806
Lack of hate.
276
00:13:49,830 --> 00:13:51,240
Well, you know what they say.
277
00:13:51,264 --> 00:13:53,184
"Lack of hate is a
many splendored thing."
278
00:13:54,067 --> 00:13:56,112
Oh, Mork, Mork.
279
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,114
If anyone on my planet
knew what I was feeling now,
280
00:13:58,138 --> 00:14:01,317
well, I'd be vaporized.
281
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:03,186
But, somehow,
ever since I met you,
282
00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:05,922
I've discovered there's
a woman inside of me.
283
00:14:05,946 --> 00:14:08,279
Oh, yes. I can see
where she's hiding.
284
00:14:11,318 --> 00:14:13,896
Oh, why? Oh, why? Why?
285
00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:15,164
Oh, why?
286
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:17,499
Why do you have
such power over me?
287
00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:19,401
I do? Yes.
288
00:14:19,425 --> 00:14:21,137
My life used to be so simple.
289
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,272
Up at 9, maim,
torture, mutilate,
290
00:14:23,296 --> 00:14:26,309
and then a light supper
and curl up with a good book.
291
00:14:26,333 --> 00:14:27,409
But now,
292
00:14:27,433 --> 00:14:28,711
now I have to have you.
293
00:14:28,735 --> 00:14:30,246
I want to take you home with me.
294
00:14:30,270 --> 00:14:31,680
You'll be my slave.
295
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:33,916
Oh, we'll have such
fun together. Ooh!
296
00:14:33,940 --> 00:14:36,274
Well, we really can't.
297
00:14:38,778 --> 00:14:39,889
We can't?
298
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:42,558
What could be more
important than being my slave?
299
00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:44,293
My friendship for Mindy.
300
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:48,130
You mean, you would pass
up cosmic euphoria for that...
301
00:14:48,154 --> 00:14:50,314
That thing scratching
around in the cage?
302
00:14:50,891 --> 00:14:51,990
You got it.
303
00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:57,139
Maybe you'll feel differently
after I put your pet to sleep.
304
00:15:00,767 --> 00:15:02,945
Now, Nirvana, don't
do anything rash.
305
00:15:02,969 --> 00:15:04,313
Mork, you still have your brain!
306
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:05,982
That's the good news.
There's some bad news
307
00:15:06,006 --> 00:15:07,549
you don't want
to hear right now.
308
00:15:07,573 --> 00:15:09,485
Listen, can we talk about
this, maybe discuss it?
309
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:11,921
No. We Necrotons have a saying:
310
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:13,189
"If an enemy gets in your way,
311
00:15:13,213 --> 00:15:16,259
you just needlepoint a
sampler out of their hair."
312
00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:18,427
Oh, you're a real homebody,
you know that? Mm-hm.
313
00:15:18,451 --> 00:15:21,597
But since I don't have
time to do all of that,
314
00:15:21,621 --> 00:15:24,200
I'll just part her hair
down to her toes.
315
00:15:24,224 --> 00:15:26,035
What did she say? Oh...
316
00:15:26,059 --> 00:15:27,270
It's just kind
of girl talk, Min.
317
00:15:27,294 --> 00:15:28,592
Something about split ends.
318
00:15:29,896 --> 00:15:31,707
Listen, if you hurt her,
you'll break my heart.
319
00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:34,676
Oh, you can have one
of mine. I have three.
320
00:15:34,700 --> 00:15:36,312
All right, pet.
321
00:15:36,336 --> 00:15:38,381
You have littered
your last cage.
322
00:15:38,405 --> 00:15:40,182
If you come near me, I'll...
323
00:15:40,206 --> 00:15:42,618
I'll poke you with my perch.
324
00:15:42,642 --> 00:15:43,986
No, no! No, no!
325
00:15:44,010 --> 00:15:45,288
Now, listen.
326
00:15:45,312 --> 00:15:47,957
If you hurt her, you'll
never, ever be my friend.
327
00:15:47,981 --> 00:15:50,659
Oh, you'll forget about her.
328
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:52,194
No. You never
forget about a friend,
329
00:15:52,218 --> 00:15:53,418
even when they're gone.
330
00:15:54,654 --> 00:15:56,632
Oh, I don't know
what I'm feeling.
331
00:15:56,656 --> 00:15:58,367
No matter what
I do, I can't win.
332
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:01,570
You are driving me crazy!
333
00:16:01,594 --> 00:16:05,374
Mork, I think she wants to be
a little more than just friends.
334
00:16:05,398 --> 00:16:06,508
I don't care what you call it.
335
00:16:06,532 --> 00:16:07,944
If I can't have him, no one can!
336
00:16:07,968 --> 00:16:09,245
Whoa! Oh.
337
00:16:09,269 --> 00:16:12,148
It's a strange way of
showing affection, Min.
338
00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:13,782
It's time for
slicing and dicing.
339
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,251
No, no.
340
00:16:15,275 --> 00:16:17,019
Not so fast, Captain Ferrucci!
341
00:16:17,043 --> 00:16:18,043
Ha-ha-ha!
342
00:16:21,348 --> 00:16:22,691
Ha-ha-ha.
343
00:16:22,715 --> 00:16:24,482
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
344
00:16:25,986 --> 00:16:27,118
Ow! Ow!
345
00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:31,356
Ha! You missed the whole galaxy.
346
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:34,125
Really?
347
00:16:36,296 --> 00:16:37,373
I warn you.
348
00:16:37,397 --> 00:16:39,797
I am the best
swordsman in all of Ork.
349
00:16:41,134 --> 00:16:42,833
Ow! NIRVANA: Ooh!
350
00:16:45,738 --> 00:16:47,216
Ho-ho-ho.
351
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:50,019
Well, I never actually
faced a person.
352
00:16:50,043 --> 00:16:51,787
But I am undefeated
353
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:53,722
at capes and pictures.
354
00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:58,060
Oh.
355
00:16:58,084 --> 00:16:59,495
I can't do it.
356
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:00,529
You win.
357
00:17:00,553 --> 00:17:01,930
I win?
358
00:17:01,954 --> 00:17:03,232
Oh, what did I do?
359
00:17:03,256 --> 00:17:04,533
I'll make a deal with you.
360
00:17:04,557 --> 00:17:05,767
Mork, you can't trust her.
361
00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:07,591
Oh, go peck your cuttlebone.
362
00:17:08,928 --> 00:17:10,672
Listen, I'll set your pet free.
363
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:11,974
I'll... I'll say in my report
364
00:17:11,998 --> 00:17:13,442
that the Earth
was uninhabitable,
365
00:17:13,466 --> 00:17:15,478
if only you'll come
back and be my mate.
366
00:17:15,502 --> 00:17:16,745
Oh, that's a wonderful offer.
367
00:17:16,769 --> 00:17:18,881
Can I sleep on that?
368
00:17:18,905 --> 00:17:20,483
Okay, okay.
369
00:17:20,507 --> 00:17:22,118
We'll go back and
you'll be the master.
370
00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:23,619
I'll be your slave.
371
00:17:23,643 --> 00:17:25,054
We've heard enough.
372
00:17:25,078 --> 00:17:26,511
Drop your sword.
373
00:17:27,813 --> 00:17:29,125
Don't point that thing at me.
374
00:17:29,149 --> 00:17:30,326
I'm your captain.
375
00:17:30,350 --> 00:17:31,927
Our ex-captain.
376
00:17:31,951 --> 00:17:34,263
Filing false reports,
that's treason.
377
00:17:34,287 --> 00:17:35,431
We're going to vaporize you
378
00:17:35,455 --> 00:17:37,466
and take the two
specimens home with us.
379
00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:39,168
We will be heroes.
380
00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:41,070
See? I told you
they wanted my job.
381
00:17:41,094 --> 00:17:43,972
Traitors deserve to suffer.
382
00:17:43,996 --> 00:17:45,874
I think we'll crush her slowly
383
00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:47,410
with the Necroton death hug.
384
00:17:47,434 --> 00:17:48,477
Ooh!
385
00:17:48,501 --> 00:17:51,847
Gee, that always
wrinkles my clothes.
386
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:53,282
Let's just vaporize her.
387
00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:54,550
Hey, you with the death ray.
388
00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:57,094
You've got a
split in your tights.
389
00:17:58,244 --> 00:18:00,289
Okay, ladies, put your hands up.
390
00:18:00,313 --> 00:18:01,757
Don't worry. She can't shoot.
391
00:18:01,781 --> 00:18:03,359
She doesn't know
the firing sequence.
392
00:18:03,383 --> 00:18:04,427
Quick! The death hug.
393
00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:05,694
No, no, no! Don't harm her!
394
00:18:05,718 --> 00:18:06,695
Aah! Oh!
395
00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:08,664
Oh. Ahh, ha-ha-ha.
396
00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:10,288
Whoo!
397
00:18:14,494 --> 00:18:16,238
Oh!
398
00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:17,940
I think I must have
found the sequence.
399
00:18:17,964 --> 00:18:20,264
Okay, gang, reach for Mars.
400
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:24,034
No. I mean, up with your hands!
401
00:18:24,971 --> 00:18:26,482
Mork, not you!
402
00:18:26,506 --> 00:18:27,950
No!! Not you, you!
403
00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:30,018
No! Not you, them!
No, you... Mork! Mork!
404
00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:31,720
Mindy... No, Mindy.
405
00:18:31,744 --> 00:18:33,089
She's with me, me, me, me, me.
406
00:18:33,113 --> 00:18:35,124
Okay, open the door.
407
00:18:35,148 --> 00:18:36,325
Get out, pet.
408
00:18:36,349 --> 00:18:37,926
I'm not a pet.
409
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,462
Okay, I'm sorry.
410
00:18:39,486 --> 00:18:41,352
Get in, goons.
411
00:18:42,322 --> 00:18:43,299
Oh, Mind.
412
00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:46,202
Oh, we did it!
413
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:48,204
You know, I still
don't understand.
414
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:51,307
I tortured you, I put
you in a cage, and...
415
00:18:51,331 --> 00:18:52,941
And yet you helped me,
416
00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:55,411
and, Mork, you saved my life.
417
00:18:55,435 --> 00:18:57,679
Well, what else
would a friend do?
418
00:18:57,703 --> 00:18:59,681
I don't know. I never had any.
419
00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:01,250
Are you gonna let us go?
420
00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:03,574
Sure. You got the gun.
421
00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:05,687
Mork. Mind.
422
00:19:05,711 --> 00:19:07,523
Here.
423
00:19:07,547 --> 00:19:09,024
We have more with our friendship
424
00:19:09,048 --> 00:19:10,559
than could ever be
destroyed by any gun.
425
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:11,893
Now will you let us go?
426
00:19:11,917 --> 00:19:13,729
Do I have to?
427
00:19:13,753 --> 00:19:14,852
A friend would.
428
00:19:16,156 --> 00:19:18,601
You guys sure play rough.
429
00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:25,941
This time I had my eyes closed.
430
00:19:25,965 --> 00:19:29,178
Yeah, me too.
431
00:19:29,202 --> 00:19:32,381
Well, goodbye, Nirvana.
432
00:19:32,405 --> 00:19:34,082
Next time you
come to this planet,
433
00:19:34,106 --> 00:19:36,051
I won't hide.
434
00:19:36,075 --> 00:19:38,621
Oh, what are you gonna
do with Kama and Sutra?
435
00:19:38,645 --> 00:19:40,689
I'm gonna try to teach
them what you taught me,
436
00:19:40,713 --> 00:19:43,153
but if that doesn't work, I
think I'll have them stuffed.
437
00:19:45,351 --> 00:19:46,362
Wait!
438
00:19:46,386 --> 00:19:50,299
W-when you have friends,
439
00:19:50,323 --> 00:19:52,601
does it hurt when
they leave you?
440
00:19:52,625 --> 00:19:54,403
Yes.
441
00:19:55,795 --> 00:19:58,407
Well, then, I guess I've
found some real friends.
442
00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:22,531
Mork calling Orson.
Come in, Orson.
443
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:26,034
Mork calling Orson.
Come in, Orson.
444
00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:28,504
Mork calling Orson.
Come in, Orson!
445
00:20:28,528 --> 00:20:29,905
Come out, come
out wherever you are.
446
00:20:29,929 --> 00:20:31,773
Olly, olly fats in free!
447
00:20:31,797 --> 00:20:33,175
Mork! Yeah.
448
00:20:33,199 --> 00:20:35,110
I'm relieved to see
you're in one piece.
449
00:20:35,134 --> 00:20:37,112
Well, sir, what did you
expect to see me in, a bikini,
450
00:20:37,136 --> 00:20:38,647
your Harper's Bazaarness? Ar-ar.
451
00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:40,816
Congratulations on once again
452
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:42,984
surviving the attack
of the Necroton.
453
00:20:43,008 --> 00:20:45,787
Well, sir, this has been
a week to end all weeks.
454
00:20:45,811 --> 00:20:47,256
I'm not kidding you.
455
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:48,591
Now that it's over,
456
00:20:48,615 --> 00:20:51,093
have you any special
observations to report?
457
00:20:51,117 --> 00:20:54,029
You must remember this:
That a kiss is still a kiss,
458
00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:56,665
and a sigh is just a sigh.
459
00:20:56,689 --> 00:20:59,568
And on Earth, friendship
is as contagious as the flu.
460
00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:00,869
Are you sure?
461
00:21:00,893 --> 00:21:03,004
Well, it must be, sir. I
mean, I caught it from Mindy,
462
00:21:03,028 --> 00:21:05,507
then I gave it to Nirvana,
captain of the Necrotons.
463
00:21:05,531 --> 00:21:07,343
You gave it away?
464
00:21:07,367 --> 00:21:08,944
Well, I got it right back.
465
00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:10,979
I mean, that's the funny
thing about friendship.
466
00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:13,415
It's like a boomerang!
467
00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:16,285
It comes right back at you. Bam!
468
00:21:16,309 --> 00:21:19,488
But you wasted it on
a Necroton, our enemy.
469
00:21:19,512 --> 00:21:21,923
Well, but now we
have one less enemy.
470
00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:24,960
There's plenty more Necrotons
where she came from, Mork.
471
00:21:24,984 --> 00:21:27,396
Oh, but, sir, how
about this for a plan?
472
00:21:27,420 --> 00:21:29,898
Tell you what. If everybody
makes two friends
473
00:21:29,922 --> 00:21:31,867
and those two friends
make two more friends,
474
00:21:31,891 --> 00:21:33,935
and two more friends,
and... Yeah! out to infinity,
475
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:36,071
pretty soon, we'll all be
flying the friendly skies
476
00:21:36,095 --> 00:21:37,506
and united.
477
00:21:37,530 --> 00:21:39,908
Until next week,
sir. Nanu, nanu.
32913
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.