All language subtitles for Mork and Mindy S01E11 Old Fears.DVDRip.NonHI.cc.en.PRMNT

Nanu-nanu.

Shazbot!

Come in.

♪ La cucaracha, la cucaracha. ♪

Hi, honey.

Hello, darling.

No, not you, her.

Hi. Oh.

What'cha doing?

I'm restringing a guitar.

How about you? Oh...

Mindy and I are
going nit-picking.

Uh, don't you mean "picnicking"?

Oh, now you're nit-picking.

Anyway, we thought
we'd go up to Boulder Lake

and have a picnic. Ahh.

I've got ham sandwiches

and hot chocolate in there.

Yeah, and I see
Mork has the blanket

and the, uh, pepper?

No, ants.

Mindy said no picnic is
complete without them.

Those ants are revolting.

No, they're happy with
their form of government.

You see, the little
suckers are just dancing.

Anyway, we stopped by

because we want you and
Grandma to come with us.

I've got plenty of food.

And plenty of ants.

Well, honey, I'd love to go,

but your grandmother
isn't feeling too well.

Oh, what's wrong?

Well, you remember
her friend Barney?

Oh, yeah, he's the one
she plays gin rummy with.

Was. He passed
away Friday night,

and Cora's taking it very hard.

Oh, that's terrible.

Yeah, especially since Barney

was four years
younger than Cora.

Mrs. Hudson, want
to buy a guitar?

No strings attached.

No, thank you, Mork.

I'm just looking for my glasses.

Oh.

Oh.

Thank you.

Whoa, you're right.

I don't think I've ever
seen her this depressed.

She's just not herself.

For three days now she
hasn't even called me a wiener.

Why is Mrs. Hudson so sad?

Well, it's probably
because she's lonely, Mork.

She just doesn't have too
many friends her own age.

Oh, on my planet, the elders
have all the friends they want.

Well, here it's a
little bit different.

Lots of people,
especially the young ones,

ignore their elders.

But they're the ones with all
the knowledge and experience.

On Ork, they're always being
surrounded by young people.

Oh, we have the same
thing in our big cities...

It's called mugging.

It's just not easy being old.

Oh.

Mrs. Hudson seems so lonely,
I'd like to do something to help.

What does she want to
do, and I'll do it with her?

Oh, that's really sweet, Mork,

but see the problem is
that she needs somebody

her own age.

Look, why don't you two
kids go have your picnic.

I'll restring Cora's guitar

and maybe that'll
make her feel better.

All right.

Well, listen, Dad, I'll
call after we're done

just to see how Grandma's doing.

Okay. I'm sure
that'll cheer her up.

Okay. Bye.

Bye, Grandma.

Hey, they ran away.

Ants. Ants.

Ants! He said he
didn't like them.

Look, he's dancing with them.

Well, I'm going
to go in the back

and see if I can
cheer Grandma up.

If anybody comes
in, uh, just yell.

You said, yell.

You okay, Mork?

Certainly, my main munchkin.

What's action, plasma?

Eeh, eeh, eeh, eeh, eeh.

Eeh, eeh.

Eugene, I...

Eugene, I want to
ask you a question.

Sure.

That's one of the
things I like about you.

Everyone else

is always telling me stuff,

you're the only one
who asks me anything.

What's happening?

What do old people do for fun?

Well, my mother's
pretty old, she's 31...

and she likes watching
soap operas on TV.

No, no, I mean a lot
older, like Mrs. Hudson.

Oh, you mean over 40.

I don't think they have any fun.

Why?

I don't know, maybe it's a law.

What do they do then?

They hang out by the
parks and the museums.

What makes those
places so special?

They're free.

Ah.

What do they do at the park?

They feed the pigeons.

Hey, I got to go
in for my lesson.

Thanks for the
information, my man.

Any time. What it was.

What it shall be.

One day. Yeah.

Hey, good lookin'.

Oh, Mindy's not in.

Who's Mindy?

I'm talking to you, brown eyes.

Oh.

Oh, why, what can
I do to help you?

Oh, you can walk up and
down my back in a flimsy kimono.

Hubba-hubba-hubba-hubba!

Oh, why I don't even
know your name.

And besides, my
kimono's at the cleaners.

Oh, shazbot.

But maybe you can
show me something

in an Ethiopian lip whistle.

A harmonica.

Oh, certainly.

Follow me.

Oh!

Whoa.

Must be jelly 'cause
jam don't shake like that.

Oh, uh, what key
would you like it in?

"Q."

Oh, we don't have
it in the key of "Q."

Well, then, you
pick one you like.

Uh, let's see, uh...

Uh, how about the key of "C"?

How about dinner?

Oh.

Well, uh,

no, I'm having
Moo Goo spaghetti.

Or whatever.

Well, you see,
I'm pre-indisposed.

Oh, cara mia,

you're beautiful when
you're tongue-tied.

Do you, uh, do you
know "Lady of Spain"?

Oh, is the Pope Polish?

Now that will be $5.29.

Oh.

$5.29.

Thank you.

Boy, I can remember when
these things used to be...

I forget.

Would you like to
have that wrapped?

Oh, no thanks,
I'll play it here.

Oh.

How about you and me
blow this Popsicle stand?

Where are you going?

To the museum.

I've never been to the museum.

Oh, come along, sweet pea.

We can't keep
those statues waiting.

This time of year the
fig leaves begin to fall.

♪ Oh, we'd make a
peach of a pair, oh ♪

♪ I know you cantaloupe,
but oh, honeydew. ♪

Oh, wait a minute.

Why, I don't even
know your name.

Uh, hah, ah, that's
a good question.

Um...

Hohner.

Bill C. Hohner.

Oh, how do you do, Mr. Hohner?

My friends just call
me "Marine Man."

On the way to the museum,

we'll stop by this
wonderful delicatessen

and pick up some munchettoes.

Oh, wonderful.

I'm starving.

Oh, not for us.

For the pigeons.

Ah, Mindy, our little
girl is growing up.

Yes, soon she'll
be leaving the nest.

Really, you two are impossible.

Oh, us?

You're the one
that's been taking

the long lunch hours.

Yes, and I'd hate for your
granddaughter to find out

how late you've been rolling
in these past two nights.

Now, the museum closes at 9:00,

and I've been home
by 10:00, haven't I?

Yes, but the museum
is only four blocks away.

I want to know what
you've been doing

between 9:00 and 10:00, hmm?

Well, we're not exactly
spring chickens, you know.

We don't just skip
along the sidewalk.

Why are you being so
secretive about all this?

Well, I think a person

should keep one's
personal life personal.

Oh.

Who's the one that
always wants to know

every last detail when
I go on a date, hmm?

Right. Turnabout is fair play,

so tell us everything.

Yeah.

Well,

so far, we have
gone to the museum.

And...? Uh-huh?

And to the park,
to feed the pigeons.

And what else have
you been doing?

Dad, she doesn't have
to answer that question.

Oh, that's all right,
dear, I'll answer him.

None of your business, Fredzo.

Isn't that nice,
she's back to normal.

Even if she is hiding something.

Well, I think it's wonderful.

You know, Grandma,

you've been like a new
woman these last few days.

Really? Oh, absolutely.

And Mindy and I are dying

to meet the man
who's responsible.

Well, it just so happens he's
coming to take me to lunch.

Lunch?

Good grief, my chicken potpie.

You know, now I might not know

what I'm talking about,
but listen to your heart.

You know, sometimes
when you listen to your head,

logic gets in the way of things.

You're right...

You don't know what
you're talking about.

I know I'm meddling,

but I just want what's
right for you and Bill.

Oh, everything's fine dear.

Only there's
something about him.

Oh, I know, I know.

I feel the same way
about John Travolta.

No. No dear, what I mean is,

there's something kind
of, well, familiar about him.

Oh, that's probably Bill now.

I'll go get my coat.

Okay.

Oh, you must be Bill.

I'm Mindy, Cora's granddaughter.

Oh, charmed.

Oh.

Oh, Dad, this is Bill.

Take a hike.

Just kidding.

You know something?

You've made my
mother-in-law very happy.

Oh, yes, she's like a kid again,

and we really want
to thank you for that.

Oh, since I've made
you both so happy,

and you don't mind what's
happening between Cora and me,

I want to share with
you a little secret.

Nanu-nanu.

Where did you hear that?

On Ork, I'm known as Mork.

I'm ready, Bill.

Did-did you have a nice chat?

Oh, yeah.

And I hope that-that Bill and I

get a chance to chat again.

Real soon.

Uh-oh.

Looks like I'm up the big
creek without locomotion.

Hold it right there, Casanova.

Casanova?

I've heard of supernova,

Chevy Nova, bossa nova...

And you're not going to get
out of this one by acting dumb.

But I wasn't acting.

Mrs. Hudson and I had
a wonderful time today.

We started off

by escorting a Boy
Scout across the street.

We had to drag him away
from his mother to do it.

Then we played chicken
with kids on skate boards.

Finally, we inched
our way up Main Street.

Backed up traffic
all the way to Utah.

We were real scamps.

Mork, how could
you do such a thing?

Oh, change my age?

With my Orkan age machine.

I set the controls for
senile, subtract two.

I'm not talking
about the mechanics

of what you did.

I want to know

why you did such a
horrible thing to Grandma.

How could it be horrible
when it makes her so happy?

She's only happy

because she thinks
that you are an old man.

But when I use my age
machine, I am an old man.

You're being unfair
to my grandmother.

How could it be unfair?

She was sad, I made her happy.

Therefore, how
can you call it unfair?

What if she falls
in love with you?

Now, you certainly aren't going

to marry her, and that
might break her heart.

Don't you see,

you could be doing
more harm than good?

Uh-oh.

Sudden realization.

Mork the Good is
suddenly Mork the Bozo.

Better call a travel agent
and book a heavy guilt trip.

How could I do
such a dumb thing?

Oh, Mork,

your intentions were good.

Yeah, but there's
a saying on Ork.

"The road to Earth is
paved with good intentions."

I'm a real nimnul.

To my face!

But how can I solve
the problem, though?

Mrs. Hudson and I have
a date tomorrow night.

I guess you're just
going to have to break up.

I'm already pretty
broken up right now.

No. I mean,

you're going to have to tell her

that you're not going
to see her anymore.

Oh boy, and is that
going to be hard.

I think she really
likes that old man.

Eugene...

I thought you'd never get here.

What's up, Mork?

I need to ask your advice again.

I'll do the best I can,

but you got to understand,
I have my limitations.

I'm only ten years old.

You're the only one I can ask.

What about Dear Abby?

She knows everything.

I've read her advice, and
how can you trust a woman

who begins her
letters, "Dear Puzzled?"

Okay, lay it on me.

All right.

Let's say someone
likes you very much,

and you want to
end the relationship?

How do you do it?

Tell them to take a hike.

Oh. Effective, but cruel.

How do you do
it if you don't want

to hurt their feelings?

Mork, there must be 50
ways to leave your lover.

But I only need seven or eight.

Lay it on me, my main munchkin.

Well, one is, you slip
out the back, Jack.

All right.

"Slip back, Jack."

Make a new plan, Stan.

Uh... plan, Stan.

Just drop off the key, Lee.

Key Lee? Oh, Chinese wisdom.

And get yourself free.

Munchkin, you are
wise beyond your height.

Well, one thing you
got to remember:

Don't let those chicks
railroad you into anything.

Yes.

Funny planet, where
chickens run the railroad.

Boy, I certainly hope
Mork can bring this off.

Oh, I know he can do it.

I just hope he doesn't
break Grandma's heart.

Mmm, Bill isn't here yet.

No.

Well, you look very
nice tonight, Cora.

Oh, thank you.

Yeah, your hair looks so pretty.

Uh, I just washed it.

Oh, that must be Bill.

I-I'll get that. Ah.

Oh, hello.

Guacamole, Señorita.

Uh, none for you until
you pluck your hand.

Oh, hello, Bill.

Oh, sweet one.

You better make this good.

No pressure.

Um, well, I, uh, guess

I'll go, uh, practice

my trombone solo.

I'll help.

Yeah. Here, Bill,
come on, sit down.

Oh.

Oh, aren't those lovely!

Thank you.

Um...

Uh, Bill...

There's something I want to...
There's something I have to s...

Psychic.

Yes, age before beauty.

No, no. Pearls before swine.

Oh, go ahead.

Oh. Kay-o.

Cora, there's something
I have to say to you,

and I'll try and make it

as quick and
painless as possible.

The-The painless is easy.

At my age, the
quick is the hard part.

Mm.

Cora, after

careful consideration,

I've decided to slip
out my back, Jackson.

Which is to say,

I'm going to make
a new plan, Chuck.

Which includes
dropping off the key.

In summation, I'm
going to get myself free.

What I'm trying
to say, Cora, is,

this is hello.

I-I haven't understood
a word you just said.

I should have asked
him for the other 46 ways.

Never mind.

Come and sit down,
because it's my turn to talk.

Oh.

Now, first of all,

I want to thank you

for helping me through
a very rough time.

Oh, rough time? About...

8:10.

Oh.

And the other thing
I want to tell you is,

I know who you are, Mork.

Shazbot!

How did you find me out?

Oh, come on.

If you were really old,

the kay-o would have
been followed by a pectate.

I'm-I'm a real nimnul then.

Oh no, you're not.

You're wonderful.

I really began to suspect that
day we went to the museum.

Remember that piece
of art work that you liked?

Oh, yes. That lovely
metallic sculpture.

Mm-hmm.

That was an air conditioner.

Oh.

And then last night
when we were lost,

you asked directions
from a pine tree.

Oh. He got us there, didn't he?

But only Mork could
do those things.

Oh.

Well, I-I guess you
don't like me anymore.

Oh, well, how can you say that?

Of course I like you.

Why, I-I like you
more than ever.

Don't you realize you...

you snapped me
out of a blue funk?

You've made me realize
that I-I have a family

that-that cares about me, and...

and a good job, and-and lots

of friends of all ages.

I'll always be your
friend, Mrs. Hudson.

Why don't you call me Grandma?

Kay-o, and hold the pectate.

But you know, there's one
thing that still bothers me.

Last night

when I tweaked
your cheek, I did it

to see if you were
wearing makeup.

And you weren't.

It's as if you really have
become an old man.

Temporarily, I am.

Oh, no, no.

There's no way on
Earth you could do that.

You're beginning
to get the idea.

Cora, there's something
I have to tell you,

and you better take
this one sitting down.

Okay. Oh!

Cora, I have to
tell you something

'cause I respect you,

'cause you're getting too
close to hide it anymore.

I'm from another planet.

I'm an alien being.

Nanu.

Do you want to hear
something weird?

Lay it on me.

I believe you.

Aha!

Oh. Why, I should have known

when you... when
you carved our initials

on that tree
with-with your finger.

I can drink with
the sucker, too!

Oh, what a relief.

You know, ever since
you moved in with Mindy,

I was seeing things that,

well, made me think
my mind was going.

But now, well, of course,

it's so simple.

A man from outer space.

You accept it so easily.

Most people just look
at me and say, "Bull!"

Oh, Mork, I've been
around a long time.

I've seen the age
of the automobile

and radio and talking movies,

and I've seen a man
walk on the moon.

Me, too.

Well, if we can go there,

there's no reason
you can't come here.

Then I can return
back to my normal age,

and you'll still be my friend?

Oh, of course.

Let's shake.

But there's one
other thing, Mork.

If you can make yourself old,

could you make
another person young?

No.

Shazbot!

Mork calling Orson.

Mork calling Orson.

Come in, Orson.

Mork calling Orson.

Come in, Orson.

Ziz, bah, ziz, bah, ziz, bah...

What are you doing?

Push-downs.

It's a common form
of Earth exercise.

Here's another one.

We must, we must, we
must build up the bust.

Why this sudden
interest in exercise?

Well, I aged myself.
I'm still a little stiff.

You aged yourself?

That's a cheap
way to get respect.

Oh, it's different here, Orson.

Here the young people
get all the attention.

What do young people know?

They don't have the experience.

That doesn't make sense.

Oh. I don't
understand it myself.

Everything else here gets
more valuable as it gets older...

Wine, cheese, furniture, coins.

Everything except people.

Here they ignore their
ancient ones, Orson.

They don't do
anything nice for them?

Well, they do one nice thing.

They fix their income.

But why do they treat
their elders like that?

Unlike us, as they get older,

their bodies fall into
a state of disrepair.

The first thing to
go is their hearing.

What?

The first thing to
go is their hearing.

Why is that, Mork?

Well, I have a
theory about that.

I feel it's because no
one asks them anything.

Such a waste.

This is Mork, signing
off until next week.

Nanu-nanu.