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1
00:00:06,907 --> 00:00:09,591
Nanu-nanu.
2
00:00:19,570 --> 00:00:20,850
Shazbot!
3
00:01:20,281 --> 00:01:21,613
Mork, where are you?
4
00:01:21,648 --> 00:01:22,914
Are you...?
5
00:01:22,949 --> 00:01:25,116
Oh, hi.
6
00:01:31,491 --> 00:01:32,458
Good morning.
7
00:01:32,493 --> 00:01:33,425
Oh, good morning.
8
00:01:33,461 --> 00:01:34,426
Are you just getting up now?
9
00:01:34,462 --> 00:01:35,839
Oh, I've been up
for several hours.
10
00:01:35,863 --> 00:01:37,173
I had to make my
report to Orson.
11
00:01:37,197 --> 00:01:38,513
Huh... all that time, huh?
12
00:01:38,548 --> 00:01:39,668
Well, he put me on hold.
13
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:40,816
Oh.
14
00:01:40,851 --> 00:01:42,184
Then you don't know.
15
00:01:42,219 --> 00:01:44,052
Look, it's snowing outside.
16
00:01:44,087 --> 00:01:46,754
Shazbot! The sky is
falling, the sky is falling!
17
00:01:46,790 --> 00:01:47,934
Mayday! Mayday!
18
00:01:47,958 --> 00:01:49,068
Take evasive action.
19
00:01:49,092 --> 00:01:50,436
You get under
there with the baby.
20
00:01:50,460 --> 00:01:52,538
You don't have
a baby... too bad.
21
00:01:52,562 --> 00:01:54,262
They were going to
scoff at Chicken Little,
22
00:01:54,298 --> 00:01:55,463
but they're not laughing now.
23
00:01:55,498 --> 00:01:56,764
That little sucker's gonna make
24
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:57,833
a lot of money off this.
25
00:01:57,868 --> 00:01:59,634
I've got to call him,
I've got to call...
26
00:01:59,669 --> 00:02:00,969
Just my luck... he's unlisted.
27
00:02:01,004 --> 00:02:02,014
Mork, calm down.
28
00:02:02,038 --> 00:02:03,283
It's just snow.
29
00:02:03,307 --> 00:02:04,973
It's perfectly harmless.
30
00:02:05,008 --> 00:02:06,403
It is? Yeah.
31
00:02:06,427 --> 00:02:07,859
Boy, do I feel like a flake.
32
00:02:09,029 --> 00:02:11,141
Hey, where'd you
learn that story
33
00:02:11,165 --> 00:02:12,909
about "the sky is falling"?
34
00:02:12,933 --> 00:02:14,883
Well, I was baby-sitting
for Eugene, and, uh,
35
00:02:14,919 --> 00:02:17,135
he told me that story
just before I fell asleep.
36
00:02:17,170 --> 00:02:19,382
Oh, well, if you'd heard
that story all the way through,
37
00:02:19,406 --> 00:02:20,683
you would have
understood the point.
38
00:02:20,707 --> 00:02:23,018
See, Chicken Little thought
an acorn dropped on his head,
39
00:02:23,042 --> 00:02:25,121
and because of that he
thought the sky was falling,
40
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,589
and that means
that he was gullible.
41
00:02:26,613 --> 00:02:27,579
That was the point.
42
00:02:27,614 --> 00:02:29,598
Oh, therefore, if I
think the sky is falling,
43
00:02:29,633 --> 00:02:30,849
ipso facto, I am gullible.
44
00:02:30,884 --> 00:02:33,352
Yeah, I'm afraid so.
45
00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:35,731
Like yesterday, when you
heard that TV commercial
46
00:02:35,755 --> 00:02:37,500
that said to run
out and catch a bus,
47
00:02:37,524 --> 00:02:39,069
and you started building a trap.
48
00:02:39,093 --> 00:02:40,258
Oh.
49
00:02:40,294 --> 00:02:41,943
I would've caught one, too.
50
00:02:41,978 --> 00:02:44,962
I was going to use a
segregated school as bait.
51
00:02:50,104 --> 00:02:52,215
Well, I have a surprise for you.
52
00:02:52,239 --> 00:02:53,271
Oh, surprise, surprise!
53
00:02:53,306 --> 00:02:54,806
Don't tell me,
oh, don't tell me.
54
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:56,008
Let me guess.
55
00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:57,408
Cuff links!
56
00:02:57,444 --> 00:02:58,910
Come on.
57
00:02:58,946 --> 00:03:00,073
Come on, you
know what's in there.
58
00:03:00,097 --> 00:03:01,841
You gave me the money
to buy it for you yourself.
59
00:03:01,865 --> 00:03:03,398
Hey, don't rain on my parade.
60
00:03:04,701 --> 00:03:07,302
Let's see, let's see, let's...
61
00:03:07,337 --> 00:03:08,515
Boy, a coat!
62
00:03:08,539 --> 00:03:09,782
Just what I've always wanted.
63
00:03:09,806 --> 00:03:11,206
Oh...
64
00:03:13,143 --> 00:03:14,287
Come on, you should put it on
65
00:03:14,311 --> 00:03:15,788
and get dressed and go out
66
00:03:15,812 --> 00:03:17,056
and observe the snow.
67
00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:18,942
It'll be a whole new experience.
68
00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:22,083
Are you sure those sky flakes
won't bash my brains out?
69
00:03:22,118 --> 00:03:25,019
I promise you
it's perfectly safe.
70
00:03:25,055 --> 00:03:26,850
Come here, I want to
show you something.
71
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:27,839
Okay.
72
00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:30,315
Don't be afraid.
73
00:03:31,912 --> 00:03:33,512
Look.
74
00:03:34,948 --> 00:03:38,349
Whoa. It's cold and beautiful.
75
00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:39,584
Yeah.
76
00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,620
And not housebroken.
77
00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,443
Dad, Dad,
78
00:03:48,479 --> 00:03:52,114
he's become very
responsible lately.
79
00:03:52,149 --> 00:03:56,485
Y-Yeah, he was
responsible for that.
80
00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:59,787
He-He was responsible
for that, too, yeah.
81
00:03:59,823 --> 00:04:01,956
Now, that wasn't his fault, Dad.
82
00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:05,427
Well, it was an old cat, anyway.
83
00:04:06,763 --> 00:04:08,803
Oh, I got to go;
somebody's at the door.
84
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:10,531
Okay, okay, yeah, I will.
85
00:04:10,567 --> 00:04:11,899
All right, bye-bye.
86
00:04:16,473 --> 00:04:19,074
Mork!
87
00:04:19,109 --> 00:04:21,076
Oh, what happened?
88
00:04:21,111 --> 00:04:23,345
Where have you been?
89
00:04:23,380 --> 00:04:24,863
Dashing through the snow.
90
00:04:24,898 --> 00:04:26,280
Oh...!
91
00:04:26,316 --> 00:04:27,765
Oh, ah, oh...
92
00:04:27,801 --> 00:04:30,135
Oh, come on in; you're frozen.
93
00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:33,138
Sit down and warm up.
94
00:04:35,842 --> 00:04:37,842
Shazbot, I'm frigid!
95
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,881
Ow! Ah, uh, oh, I'm melting!
96
00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:46,318
Mork, what happened
to your new coat?
97
00:04:46,353 --> 00:04:47,335
I gave it away.
98
00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:49,837
What?! You gave away
your brand-new coat?
99
00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:52,540
Well, the man I gave it to
didn't have any, and I have two.
100
00:04:52,575 --> 00:04:53,975
Besides, I had to pay him back.
101
00:04:54,011 --> 00:04:55,721
He gave me a sip
out of his paper bag.
102
00:04:55,745 --> 00:04:57,111
Oh, Mork.
103
00:04:57,146 --> 00:05:01,066
Look, you shouldn't give
away your belongings like that.
104
00:05:01,101 --> 00:05:02,317
Monty Hall does.
105
00:05:02,352 --> 00:05:03,719
Oh...
106
00:05:03,754 --> 00:05:05,648
I saw him give $1,000
to two sweaty avocados.
107
00:05:07,875 --> 00:05:09,641
That's a game show.
108
00:05:09,676 --> 00:05:11,009
Don't you see, that man
109
00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:12,978
took advantage
of your generosity.
110
00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:15,313
Mork, you've got to
learn how to say no.
111
00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:16,414
Do you understand?
112
00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:18,082
No!
113
00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:19,684
Just practicing.
114
00:05:21,221 --> 00:05:22,365
I'll get it.
115
00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:24,055
No! Nein! Mm-mmm!
116
00:05:24,090 --> 00:05:26,625
No way, baby, not me, mm-mmm.
117
00:05:29,996 --> 00:05:31,162
Hiya, mister.
118
00:05:31,198 --> 00:05:32,609
Would you like to
buy some cookies?
119
00:05:32,633 --> 00:05:34,032
No!
120
00:05:41,825 --> 00:05:43,007
How was that?
121
00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:45,243
That was deplorable.
122
00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:46,945
Thank you.
123
00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:48,340
Mork, how could
you slam the door
124
00:05:48,364 --> 00:05:49,747
in that poor little girl's face?
125
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,410
Well, she was selling
cookies, and I didn't want any.
126
00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:54,835
Mork, nobody
wants those cookies.
127
00:05:54,871 --> 00:05:57,188
But you don't, you
don't slam the door
128
00:05:57,223 --> 00:05:59,056
in a little girl's face. Oh...
129
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,194
Okay, buster,
130
00:06:03,229 --> 00:06:05,997
so much for the soft sell.
131
00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:09,000
Look, chump, this is
for charity, you know.
132
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:10,212
If you don't buy,
133
00:06:10,236 --> 00:06:13,171
some sweet little kid
doesn't go to camp...
134
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:15,073
Namely me.
135
00:06:15,108 --> 00:06:18,309
And we don't make
diddley on these crackers
136
00:06:18,344 --> 00:06:20,045
unless we sell volume.
137
00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:22,280
And we need big bucks.
138
00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:25,411
Am I getting through
to you, Bright Eyes?
139
00:06:25,435 --> 00:06:27,335
I'll take a box.
140
00:06:27,370 --> 00:06:29,353
Not good enough. Two boxes.
141
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:31,568
That wouldn't buy
my sweat socks.
142
00:06:31,592 --> 00:06:34,209
Mork, don't get carried away.
143
00:06:34,244 --> 00:06:35,694
I can't; all I've
got is three bucks.
144
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:37,195
You'll owe me the rest.
145
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:50,608
Mork, you let that little girl
trick you out of your money.
146
00:06:50,643 --> 00:06:51,660
Uh-uh, not me.
147
00:06:51,695 --> 00:06:52,805
I played a trick on her.
148
00:06:52,829 --> 00:06:55,309
I've got a dollar left.
149
00:06:56,633 --> 00:06:59,113
Shazbot, it's in my new coat.
150
00:07:00,971 --> 00:07:02,582
But seriously, you
know, I met a girl.
151
00:07:02,606 --> 00:07:04,484
Now I'm not going to
say she's incredible,
152
00:07:04,508 --> 00:07:06,418
but, you know, yada-yada.
153
00:07:06,442 --> 00:07:08,922
And that was just her head.
154
00:07:11,114 --> 00:07:12,964
What are you doing?
155
00:07:12,999 --> 00:07:15,116
My drum shtick.
156
00:07:17,104 --> 00:07:19,570
Well, you can stay here
and play the drum if you want.
157
00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:21,590
I'm gonna beat it. Ha-ha-ha.
158
00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:24,508
Humor.
159
00:07:30,901 --> 00:07:32,234
I got to go to the bank,
160
00:07:32,269 --> 00:07:34,369
so I'll be back in
five minutes, okay?
161
00:07:34,404 --> 00:07:35,548
Take as long as you want.
162
00:07:35,572 --> 00:07:37,399
You're in good
hands with Orkstate.
163
00:07:37,423 --> 00:07:38,706
Now, that's humor.
164
00:07:42,695 --> 00:07:43,894
I'll see you later.
165
00:07:43,930 --> 00:07:45,547
Oh, excuse me.
166
00:07:45,582 --> 00:07:47,849
Mork, help him out.
167
00:07:50,386 --> 00:07:52,498
Excuse me, what're ya...
what the heck you doing?
168
00:07:52,522 --> 00:07:53,599
I'm helping you out.
169
00:07:53,623 --> 00:07:56,558
That's the last time I ever
come in here to get warm.
170
00:08:01,814 --> 00:08:03,748
Hold it!
171
00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:08,531
I tell you, you
got the wrong guy.
172
00:08:08,555 --> 00:08:09,954
That's a gross prevarication.
173
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,656
Put your hand through here.
174
00:08:11,691 --> 00:08:12,757
I've apprehended you,
175
00:08:12,792 --> 00:08:14,737
and I shall apprehend
your partner forthwith.
176
00:08:14,761 --> 00:08:16,472
I'm off to pursue
his accomplice.
177
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:18,046
Keep an eye on this one.
178
00:08:26,890 --> 00:08:28,339
What are you doing?
179
00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:30,925
Keeping my eye on you.
180
00:08:30,961 --> 00:08:32,393
Hey, back off.
181
00:08:32,428 --> 00:08:33,539
I'm in no mood for jokes.
182
00:08:33,563 --> 00:08:34,796
I've had a real crummy day.
183
00:08:34,831 --> 00:08:35,930
Sorry to hear about that.
184
00:08:35,966 --> 00:08:37,715
What happened?
185
00:08:37,750 --> 00:08:39,595
Well, it started
off pretty good.
186
00:08:39,619 --> 00:08:40,852
I escaped from prison.
187
00:08:40,887 --> 00:08:43,037
Everything's been
downhill since then.
188
00:08:43,072 --> 00:08:44,822
Oh, prison... I know about that.
189
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:47,925
That's where you get free
clothes, free food, no rent.
190
00:08:49,345 --> 00:08:50,957
Sounds better
the way you put it.
191
00:08:50,981 --> 00:08:52,792
I really didn't like
being in there.
192
00:08:52,816 --> 00:08:54,032
Why did you go?
193
00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:55,833
Well, it's a long story.
194
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,969
As a kid, I was a shoplifter.
195
00:08:59,155 --> 00:09:00,705
Boy, you must be strong.
196
00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:05,426
No, it was mostly small stuff.
197
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:06,873
And then I started
stealing cars,
198
00:09:06,897 --> 00:09:08,774
and they finally caught
me, and here I am.
199
00:09:08,798 --> 00:09:10,231
Boy, I feel really bad.
200
00:09:10,266 --> 00:09:12,767
I never stole a car,
and here I am, too.
201
00:09:12,803 --> 00:09:16,905
Yeah, I, uh, I wanted
to get out one last time
202
00:09:16,940 --> 00:09:19,440
to see my poor sick mother.
203
00:09:19,475 --> 00:09:20,491
You have a mother?
204
00:09:20,526 --> 00:09:24,262
Yeah. Now I guess
I'll never see her again.
205
00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:29,734
Choke. Gasp. Look
of sincere empathy.
206
00:09:29,770 --> 00:09:31,770
Is there anything
I can do for you?
207
00:09:31,805 --> 00:09:35,556
Well, you could get me out of
these handcuffs and let me go.
208
00:09:35,592 --> 00:09:36,574
Oh, I'd be glad to.
209
00:09:36,609 --> 00:09:37,653
Every son should see his mother.
210
00:09:37,677 --> 00:09:38,626
Wish I had one, but...
211
00:09:38,662 --> 00:09:40,395
Hey, wait, doesn't
that policeman
212
00:09:40,430 --> 00:09:41,629
want you to stay here?
213
00:09:41,665 --> 00:09:42,797
Oh, I'll be back.
214
00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:44,398
Don't worry about that.
215
00:09:44,433 --> 00:09:45,466
You promise?
216
00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:47,335
Cross my heart and hope to die.
217
00:09:47,370 --> 00:09:48,697
You're sure the
policeman won't mind?
218
00:09:48,721 --> 00:09:51,072
He won't give it
a second thought.
219
00:09:51,107 --> 00:09:52,440
Trust me.
220
00:09:52,475 --> 00:09:56,527
And I'll be back by, say, uh...
- 00 tomorrow.
221
00:09:56,562 --> 00:09:57,762
Kay-o.
222
00:10:00,617 --> 00:10:01,950
How did you do that?
223
00:10:01,985 --> 00:10:05,753
It's kind of like a card trick,
but I do it with molecules.
224
00:10:05,789 --> 00:10:07,138
That's incredible.
225
00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:09,673
Never mind, uh,
uh, thanks, buddy.
226
00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:10,853
Uh, see you around.
227
00:10:10,877 --> 00:10:12,410
Say hi to Mom for me.
228
00:10:13,746 --> 00:10:14,912
That reminds me.
229
00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:16,614
I'm a little short on cash.
230
00:10:16,649 --> 00:10:18,383
Could you loan me ten bucks?
231
00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:20,768
Ten dollars... What do
you think, I'm gullible?
232
00:10:20,803 --> 00:10:22,131
Here, here's five.
233
00:10:22,155 --> 00:10:24,488
Get out of here!
234
00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:37,168
Mork, Mork, did you
hear what's going on?
235
00:10:37,203 --> 00:10:39,270
A cop is chasing a couple
of escaped criminals.
236
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:40,616
I know. He brought one in here
237
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,718
and tried to tie him
up with this metal thing.
238
00:10:42,742 --> 00:10:43,708
Where is he?
239
00:10:43,743 --> 00:10:45,727
I let him go. You what?
240
00:10:45,762 --> 00:10:46,922
I hate to blow my own horn.
241
00:10:46,946 --> 00:10:48,513
Blow your own horn?!
242
00:10:48,548 --> 00:10:49,726
Well, if you insist.
243
00:10:51,685 --> 00:10:54,135
Thank you, baby, thank you.
244
00:10:59,626 --> 00:11:00,736
What's wrong with him?
245
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:02,527
Oh, the doctor put
some drops in my eyes,
246
00:11:02,562 --> 00:11:03,628
and I can't see a thing,
247
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,763
but I'll be back to normal
in a couple of hours.
248
00:11:05,799 --> 00:11:07,760
In the meantime, do you
want to have some fun?
249
00:11:07,784 --> 00:11:08,961
Let's let go of him
250
00:11:08,985 --> 00:11:11,013
and watch him
bump into the wall.
251
00:11:11,037 --> 00:11:14,522
Dad, you're never going
to guess what Mork just did.
252
00:11:14,557 --> 00:11:16,541
Uh, do we have to
notify next of kin?
253
00:11:16,576 --> 00:11:18,943
A policeman caught
an escaped criminal,
254
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:20,662
and Mork just set him free.
255
00:11:20,697 --> 00:11:23,181
What?
256
00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:25,716
A policeman caught
an escaped criminal,
257
00:11:25,751 --> 00:11:28,903
and Mork just set him free!
258
00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:35,760
Well, why in the world
259
00:11:35,795 --> 00:11:37,629
would you release
an escaped criminal?
260
00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:39,531
Excuse... uh...
261
00:11:40,617 --> 00:11:43,051
Because he wanted me to!
262
00:11:43,086 --> 00:11:44,986
Stop shouting, stop shouting.
263
00:11:45,021 --> 00:11:46,254
For goodness sakes.
264
00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:48,756
Mork, this is serious.
265
00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:50,291
I don't know why
everybody's so upset.
266
00:11:50,326 --> 00:11:51,893
He said he'd turn
himself in tomorrow.
267
00:11:51,928 --> 00:11:53,778
He lied to you, Mork.
268
00:11:53,813 --> 00:11:55,262
Oh, I don't think so.
269
00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:57,164
He never lied to me before.
270
00:11:57,199 --> 00:11:59,534
Besides, he said he
wanted to get out of prison
271
00:11:59,569 --> 00:12:00,768
to see his sick mother.
272
00:12:00,804 --> 00:12:02,403
And you bought that?
273
00:12:02,438 --> 00:12:04,822
I don't think he'd
sell his mother.
274
00:12:04,858 --> 00:12:07,425
Mork, how could
you believe that?
275
00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:09,928
I sense that you're mad at me.
276
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:12,864
Yes, you're getting warmer.
277
00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:14,549
Oh, Mork,
278
00:12:14,584 --> 00:12:15,766
I'm not mad at you.
279
00:12:15,802 --> 00:12:18,336
It's, it's just that
you're too trusting.
280
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:19,582
And that's bad?
281
00:12:19,606 --> 00:12:20,805
It is.
282
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,056
Trust me.
283
00:12:23,543 --> 00:12:27,762
Mork, you see, you let an
escaped prisoner get away.
284
00:12:27,797 --> 00:12:29,797
Why, uh, that's a crime.
285
00:12:29,832 --> 00:12:31,866
His cohort got away,
286
00:12:31,901 --> 00:12:35,036
but I presume one jailbird
in the hand is worth...
287
00:12:35,071 --> 00:12:36,587
Where is he?
288
00:12:36,623 --> 00:12:37,888
Now, where's who?
289
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:39,602
The prisoner I had
handcuffed right here.
290
00:12:39,626 --> 00:12:41,837
Oh, why, uh, he got away.
291
00:12:41,861 --> 00:12:43,361
Uh, Mork had
nothing to do with it.
292
00:12:43,396 --> 00:12:45,196
And I'm an eyewitness to that.
293
00:12:46,582 --> 00:12:48,427
I can understand
what you're trying to do.
294
00:12:48,451 --> 00:12:50,446
You're trying to protect
me, but I can't let you
295
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:51,747
take the coat for me.
296
00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:53,404
The rap.
297
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,240
Your planet.
298
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,108
I let your prisoner go.
299
00:12:58,144 --> 00:13:00,089
Young man, what
you did wasn't nice.
300
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:02,680
You released my suspect.
301
00:13:02,716 --> 00:13:05,350
Boy, am I perturbed.
302
00:13:05,385 --> 00:13:08,052
I should strike you about
the head and shoulders.
303
00:13:09,072 --> 00:13:10,688
What're you going to do?
304
00:13:10,723 --> 00:13:12,841
I'm taking him in for
aiding and abetting
305
00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:14,175
an escaped prisoner.
306
00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:15,810
Oh...
307
00:13:15,845 --> 00:13:17,528
You need these.
308
00:13:17,564 --> 00:13:20,865
Oh, you've been
there before, huh?
309
00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:24,201
Don't worry, Mindy.
It'll be all right.
310
00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:25,870
He'll come back. I know he will.
311
00:13:25,905 --> 00:13:29,239
Oh, Mork. He was
real happy when he left.
312
00:13:39,903 --> 00:13:41,369
Mork,
313
00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:43,149
the judge'll be ready for
your preliminary hearing
314
00:13:43,173 --> 00:13:44,138
in about a half an hour.
315
00:13:44,174 --> 00:13:45,400
Thanks, Officer Bob. Sure.
316
00:13:45,424 --> 00:13:48,876
Come on, fellas.
317
00:13:48,912 --> 00:13:51,546
The judge is ready to give
you guys your sentences now.
318
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:53,025
I have a sentence for you.
319
00:13:53,049 --> 00:13:56,017
Uh, vamonos, meshuggeners.
320
00:13:59,605 --> 00:14:01,238
I hate to tell you guys this,
321
00:14:01,274 --> 00:14:02,674
uh, but you got
the hanging judge,
322
00:14:02,709 --> 00:14:04,659
and he's in a bad mood.
323
00:14:04,694 --> 00:14:07,878
Have a nice day. Thanks, Mork.
324
00:14:19,559 --> 00:14:21,626
Don't push!
325
00:14:22,646 --> 00:14:26,013
We're going, we're going.
326
00:14:26,048 --> 00:14:28,182
Come along, my brothers.
327
00:14:28,217 --> 00:14:30,268
He's a non-believer.
328
00:14:30,303 --> 00:14:33,621
All we can do is forgive him.
329
00:14:35,892 --> 00:14:40,478
You're going to crowd all
of us in this one tiny cell?
330
00:14:41,498 --> 00:14:43,081
Ciao.
331
00:14:45,752 --> 00:14:48,485
Exidor, is that you?
332
00:14:48,521 --> 00:14:52,456
Mork? Is that you?
333
00:14:52,491 --> 00:14:53,708
Where are you?
334
00:14:53,743 --> 00:14:56,811
I'm over here!
335
00:14:56,846 --> 00:15:01,382
Step aside! I can't see!
336
00:15:01,417 --> 00:15:02,783
Ah!
337
00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:04,485
There you are.
338
00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,321
Mork, my old friend.
339
00:15:06,356 --> 00:15:07,800
Exidor, why are you in jail?
340
00:15:07,824 --> 00:15:10,158
Religious persecution.
341
00:15:10,193 --> 00:15:11,592
Why are you here?
342
00:15:11,627 --> 00:15:12,927
I set a criminal free.
343
00:15:12,962 --> 00:15:15,279
Why did you do that?
That's against the law.
344
00:15:15,314 --> 00:15:17,225
Well, he said he had to get
out to see his sick mother,
345
00:15:17,249 --> 00:15:19,649
and he promised
he'd be back today.
346
00:15:19,786 --> 00:15:21,786
Excuse me, Mork.
347
00:15:29,328 --> 00:15:33,497
As my dear father would
say, you're a pea brain!
348
00:15:33,532 --> 00:15:36,183
But I know he'll come
back. He promised.
349
00:15:36,219 --> 00:15:37,863
Mork, the man lied to you,
350
00:15:37,887 --> 00:15:40,349
just as those crummy
Venusians lied to me.
351
00:15:40,373 --> 00:15:42,256
I know. You can't trust
a man with four lips.
352
00:15:42,292 --> 00:15:44,859
All you get is double-talk.
353
00:15:44,894 --> 00:15:46,605
They promised me they were
354
00:15:46,629 --> 00:15:49,364
coming down to destroy
the Earth on Labor Day.
355
00:15:49,399 --> 00:15:51,165
They let me down.
356
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:54,035
Bummer. Sorry to hear that.
357
00:15:54,070 --> 00:15:57,871
It was then I realized that
my faith had been misplaced,
358
00:15:57,907 --> 00:16:01,041
and I began my quest for truth.
359
00:16:01,077 --> 00:16:05,646
I tried Buddhism,
Catholicism, Judaism,
360
00:16:05,682 --> 00:16:08,549
Punch and Judaism...
361
00:16:08,585 --> 00:16:11,319
but nothing worked for me
362
00:16:11,354 --> 00:16:14,488
until... I found...
363
00:16:14,524 --> 00:16:16,657
Him! Who?
364
00:16:16,693 --> 00:16:20,328
Mork... I worship...
365
00:16:20,363 --> 00:16:23,864
O.J. Simpson!
366
00:16:29,873 --> 00:16:31,600
Isn't he a football player?
367
00:16:31,624 --> 00:16:34,007
A football player?
368
00:16:34,043 --> 00:16:38,178
Mork, he is the football player.
369
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:41,699
Tell me, did you ever
see the Reverend Ike
370
00:16:41,734 --> 00:16:46,237
streak down the
sidelines untouched?
371
00:16:46,272 --> 00:16:53,211
Did you ever see Billy Graham
snake over from the two?
372
00:16:53,246 --> 00:16:55,713
Did you ever see Oral Roberts
373
00:16:55,748 --> 00:16:59,717
juke a linebacker
out of his socks?
374
00:16:59,752 --> 00:17:05,656
Sure, Moses walked
across the Red Sea,
375
00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:08,425
but could he have
done it on Astroturf?
376
00:17:08,461 --> 00:17:12,412
Mork, I believe in the Juice.
377
00:17:13,515 --> 00:17:16,634
You, too, can be a
born-again Simpson.
378
00:17:16,669 --> 00:17:19,453
Let O.J. show you the way.
379
00:17:19,489 --> 00:17:21,656
Just look at my followers.
380
00:17:21,691 --> 00:17:24,325
Look at the peace and
serenity in their eyes.
381
00:17:24,360 --> 00:17:26,827
There's Isaiah... Hi.
382
00:17:26,862 --> 00:17:28,479
Merlin... Howdy.
383
00:17:28,514 --> 00:17:30,998
Too Tall... Whoa...
384
00:17:31,033 --> 00:17:32,511
Bubba... My man.
385
00:17:32,535 --> 00:17:35,603
These, Mork, are my conversions.
386
00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:37,015
Conversions...
good for one point.
387
00:17:40,209 --> 00:17:43,177
You know, Mork,
before I found O.J.,
388
00:17:43,212 --> 00:17:47,447
I couldn't laugh this easily.
389
00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:50,751
He can do the same for
you as he's done for me.
390
00:17:50,786 --> 00:17:54,288
Join us, Mork. Follow
us to the Promised Land.
391
00:17:54,323 --> 00:17:55,839
San Francisco?
392
00:17:55,874 --> 00:17:58,359
Yea, verily, Candlestick Park.
393
00:17:58,394 --> 00:18:00,773
Oh, I see... believe, and
ye shall bear oranges.
394
00:18:00,797 --> 00:18:02,146
Praise Anita!
395
00:18:02,181 --> 00:18:03,181
Yes!
396
00:18:07,504 --> 00:18:11,672
Mork, I want you to renounce
your sins against football.
397
00:18:11,708 --> 00:18:13,786
Exidor, I watched
the World Series.
398
00:18:13,810 --> 00:18:16,493
Oh, blasphemy!
399
00:18:16,529 --> 00:18:18,829
The World Series?
Baseball is pagan.
400
00:18:18,864 --> 00:18:20,614
Do ten Hike Marys.
401
00:18:20,649 --> 00:18:22,310
And I look up to
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar.
402
00:18:22,334 --> 00:18:24,835
Ah, do a hundred push-ups.
403
00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:26,148
And I hate to say this...
404
00:18:26,172 --> 00:18:28,322
I like Howard Cosell.
405
00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,993
Let us pray.
406
00:18:34,197 --> 00:18:37,598
Hut, hut, hut!
407
00:18:38,651 --> 00:18:40,817
Amen.
408
00:18:41,854 --> 00:18:46,189
Do you mind not smoking?
409
00:18:46,225 --> 00:18:49,227
This man is having a
religious experience.
410
00:18:49,262 --> 00:18:51,846
Are you feeling it, Mork?
411
00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,848
No.
412
00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:55,850
Do you feel it now?
413
00:18:55,885 --> 00:18:56,851
No.
414
00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:58,034
Do you feel it...
415
00:18:58,070 --> 00:18:59,019
now?!
416
00:18:59,055 --> 00:19:00,788
Whoa! Praise football!
417
00:19:00,823 --> 00:19:02,651
♪ Give me that
old-time football ♪
418
00:19:02,675 --> 00:19:04,252
♪ Give me that
old-time football ♪
419
00:19:04,276 --> 00:19:06,126
♪ It's good enough for me. ♪
420
00:19:06,161 --> 00:19:07,561
Sunday in San Francisco.
421
00:19:07,597 --> 00:19:09,040
Some good and
glorious happenings.
422
00:19:09,064 --> 00:19:10,046
Can you hear it now?
423
00:19:10,082 --> 00:19:10,964
Tell me, brother.
424
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,466
Now O.J. takes the ball
425
00:19:12,502 --> 00:19:14,813
on the seven now,
runs it 30 yards,
426
00:19:14,837 --> 00:19:17,805
but, oh, no, clipping
now, clipping now,
427
00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:19,601
can you feel that clipping
now? 15 yards, 15 yards.
428
00:19:19,625 --> 00:19:24,394
O.J. takes the ball again, and a
hole opens up before him now.
429
00:19:24,430 --> 00:19:26,980
He's on the 50
now, on the 40 now,
430
00:19:27,016 --> 00:19:29,495
on the 30 now, on the 20 now,
431
00:19:29,519 --> 00:19:32,653
on the ten now, and he goes in!
432
00:19:32,688 --> 00:19:34,988
Salvation!
433
00:19:35,024 --> 00:19:37,691
Beg for mercy!
434
00:19:37,727 --> 00:19:40,010
Oh, oh, Mork!
435
00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:43,431
You're a true believer, Mork!
436
00:19:43,466 --> 00:19:44,843
I hate to disappoint
you, Exidor,
437
00:19:44,867 --> 00:19:47,179
but I don't have
much faith in football,
438
00:19:47,203 --> 00:19:49,003
and O.J.'s just a man,
439
00:19:49,038 --> 00:19:51,518
and football's just a game.
440
00:19:53,893 --> 00:19:56,076
Blasphemy!
441
00:19:56,112 --> 00:20:01,882
Mork... you've just fouled
out in the game of life!
442
00:20:04,887 --> 00:20:09,590
May you burn in Buffalo!
443
00:20:13,563 --> 00:20:15,663
Oh, Mork!
444
00:20:15,698 --> 00:20:16,864
Oh, Mork...
445
00:20:16,899 --> 00:20:18,215
Good-bye.
446
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:20,384
Oh, we tried to bail you out,
447
00:20:20,419 --> 00:20:22,920
but they won't let us until
the preliminary hearing.
448
00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:25,315
Bail me out...
why, am I leaking?
449
00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:27,474
How was your night in jail?
450
00:20:27,510 --> 00:20:30,410
Nobody knows the
trouble I've seen.
451
00:20:30,446 --> 00:20:31,828
Oh, what trouble?
452
00:20:31,864 --> 00:20:33,213
Nobody knows.
453
00:20:33,248 --> 00:20:35,098
Has he showed up yet?
454
00:20:35,133 --> 00:20:37,568
Mork, that guy... He
escaped from prison.
455
00:20:37,604 --> 00:20:39,103
Now, why would
he want to go back?
456
00:20:39,138 --> 00:20:40,799
Because he said he wanted
to see his sick mother.
457
00:20:40,823 --> 00:20:44,658
Oh, his poor sick mother.
458
00:20:44,693 --> 00:20:49,095
When it comes to
trust, he's full of it!
459
00:20:50,617 --> 00:20:52,933
He's crazy, you know.
460
00:20:54,770 --> 00:20:58,088
But don't just take it from us.
461
00:20:58,123 --> 00:21:00,068
Excuse me, I have
to break up a fight.
462
00:21:01,159 --> 00:21:02,871
Bubba! Too Tall! Break it up!
463
00:21:02,895 --> 00:21:05,396
Huddle on the 15!
464
00:21:13,239 --> 00:21:14,521
I'll be all right.
465
00:21:14,557 --> 00:21:17,117
He promised he'd
be back by 2:00.
466
00:21:17,309 --> 00:21:18,659
Well, there's your proof.
467
00:21:18,695 --> 00:21:20,093
It's after 2:30 right now.
468
00:21:20,129 --> 00:21:21,556
It is? Yeah.
469
00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:23,892
But he promised.
I did him a favor.
470
00:21:23,916 --> 00:21:27,218
Boy, I really Orked
it up this time.
471
00:21:27,253 --> 00:21:29,681
Oh, I guess you've
proven your point.
472
00:21:29,705 --> 00:21:32,840
I should never trust
anyone anymore.
473
00:21:40,049 --> 00:21:42,216
Sorry I'm late...
Mom got thirsty,
474
00:21:42,251 --> 00:21:44,918
so I knocked
over a liquor store.
475
00:21:46,171 --> 00:21:49,940
Just kidding. A
little slammer humor.
476
00:21:51,610 --> 00:21:54,661
Hi, Mork. Mom says
"Hi" and "Thanks".
477
00:21:54,697 --> 00:21:55,495
Oh, you're welcome.
478
00:21:55,531 --> 00:21:57,631
Do I get out now?
479
00:21:57,666 --> 00:21:59,427
No. You still
committed a crime...
480
00:21:59,451 --> 00:22:01,585
but due to the
extenuating circumstances,
481
00:22:01,620 --> 00:22:04,188
I'll have a dialogue
with the adjudicator,
482
00:22:04,223 --> 00:22:06,023
and I think you will be,
483
00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:09,209
as the street people
put it, extricated.
484
00:22:12,715 --> 00:22:15,215
I don't understand.
Why'd you turn yourself in?
485
00:22:15,251 --> 00:22:16,528
I promised him.
486
00:22:16,552 --> 00:22:19,854
Just because I'm a thief
doesn't mean I'm a liar.
487
00:22:19,889 --> 00:22:22,356
I couldn't let him get
in trouble for helpin' me.
488
00:22:22,392 --> 00:22:24,202
He's the only one
that's trusted me...
489
00:22:24,226 --> 00:22:27,661
except Mom, and
she hides her jewelry.
490
00:22:28,914 --> 00:22:32,916
You're late for
practice, Whitey.
491
00:22:38,224 --> 00:22:41,058
You know, Dad, maybe
we've become too cynical.
492
00:22:41,093 --> 00:22:44,594
Maybe we get what
we expect out of people.
493
00:22:44,630 --> 00:22:46,558
There's an old Orkan
phrase about that:
494
00:22:46,582 --> 00:22:49,516
"If one cannot trust oneself,
then one cannot trust another."
495
00:22:49,552 --> 00:22:53,137
Oh, that's nice.
I'm not finished.
496
00:22:53,172 --> 00:22:54,315
"And if one cannot
trust another,
497
00:22:54,339 --> 00:22:55,517
"then others
cannot trust another,
498
00:22:55,541 --> 00:22:56,852
"and then others
cannot trust others,
499
00:22:56,876 --> 00:22:58,275
and finally, who can one trust?"
500
00:22:59,495 --> 00:23:01,896
Uh, does everybody
on Ork talk like that?
501
00:23:01,931 --> 00:23:04,431
Well, we don't have sex.
We've got to do something.
502
00:23:12,057 --> 00:23:14,341
Mork calling Orson.
Come in, Orson.
503
00:23:14,376 --> 00:23:17,845
Mork calling Orson.
Come in, Orson.
504
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:19,847
Mork calling Orson.
505
00:23:19,882 --> 00:23:21,682
Come in, Orson.
506
00:23:21,717 --> 00:23:23,533
Hello, this is Orson.
507
00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:25,535
You'll have to call back later,
508
00:23:25,571 --> 00:23:28,422
because I'm out of
my mind right now.
509
00:23:28,457 --> 00:23:32,042
If you like, you may leave a
message between the two beeps.
510
00:23:32,077 --> 00:23:34,211
Hi, Orson. This is Mork.
511
00:23:34,246 --> 00:23:36,057
I just called to say that...
512
00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:38,560
Hello, Mork. Sorry I was busy.
513
00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:40,562
What were you doing?
Taking a meteor shower?
514
00:23:41,754 --> 00:23:43,565
Mork, will you be serious?
515
00:23:43,589 --> 00:23:45,873
Sorry, O Fattest
of All Living Things.
516
00:23:45,908 --> 00:23:48,875
This week, I learned about
a popular Earth religion.
517
00:23:48,911 --> 00:23:50,739
Believe it or not,
some life-forms here
518
00:23:50,763 --> 00:23:52,229
worship O.J. Simpson.
519
00:23:52,264 --> 00:23:54,848
The Juice? Yes, and
even the Gentiles.
520
00:23:54,883 --> 00:23:56,561
Is that the only
religion on Earth?
521
00:23:56,585 --> 00:23:58,747
No, there's several others,
but the main difference
522
00:23:58,771 --> 00:24:01,221
is that football services are
held on Sunday afternoon
523
00:24:01,257 --> 00:24:02,673
instead of the morning.
524
00:24:02,708 --> 00:24:05,353
Don't Earthlings need a
common belief to unite them?
525
00:24:05,377 --> 00:24:06,844
Oh, they have that.
526
00:24:06,879 --> 00:24:08,857
They all believe they
can't trust one another.
527
00:24:08,881 --> 00:24:10,825
Why do they feel that way?
528
00:24:10,849 --> 00:24:12,999
I guess they're
afraid of being hurt.
529
00:24:13,035 --> 00:24:16,336
Too bad they don't make
football pads for the heart.
530
00:24:16,372 --> 00:24:18,533
This is Mork, signing off
from Boulder, Colorado.
531
00:24:18,557 --> 00:24:20,875
Until next week, nanu-nanu.
36595
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