All language subtitles for Greek S03E18 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 H 264-CRUD_track3_[eng]

Previously on Greek:

I do not want to go
to Yale a virgin,

so I have decided to lose
my virginity to you, tonight.

Hey, I don't know
what your problem is.

Why do you even care
anyway?

Because I like you. Duh!

- What can I get you guys?
- Two Cosmos.

- What are you doing?
- I care about you, too,

but that doesn't mean
we need to be exclusive.

- You mean you
haven't been exclusive?
- Love doesn't work!

You want to know why
you don't believe in love?

Because you're heartless.

I have made a pretty big
decision myself.

This is a form
for declaring a major.

I saw the form.
Why did you lie to me?

Why didn't you tell me
you're nowhere close
to picking a major?

OK, I'm sorry.
I screwed up.

But the truth is,
I'm not ready to graduate.

Um... hi.

Will you accept
my a-pollen-gy?

"A-pollen-gy?"

Well, ahem, it was
either that or, uh...

"please flor-give me."

I bought the flowers.
I didn't steal them
from someone else's lawn.

So what do you say?

Come on, Case, we've barely
spoken since Mardi Gras

and now I'm apologizing.

Thank you for the flowers.

And how about
the a-pollen-gy?

- Do you really mean it?
- Sure. I'm sorry
for our fight.

The fight? That's it?

And anything else
I may have done recently,
hence the flowers.

Can we just make up and pretend
like this never happened?

When I thought I might have
had a chance in Washington

you told me you wanted
to declare a major,
which implied

that you wanted to move forward
with us after graduation.

But now that you don't,

I'm a little
freaked out about us.

Um...

I have to get to class.

Cool! Yeah, no,
I'll just...

...bring the flowers by
later, then.

Your hair, it looks...

Like Madonna's Lucky Star
video, 1983?

Exactly!

I'm just trying out some looks
for '80s Night at Dobler's.

Are you going?

'Cause you should
really come

and dress as
Anthony Michael Hall
in Sixteen Candles.

Or in The Breakfast Club.
Or Weird Science.

I might, but I wouldn't
know who to take.

You see, I'm kind of
in this complicated
dating situation.

You see, there's Katherine
and there's Dana.

I'm sort of dating Katherine,

but Dana told me
she likes me, too.

But if I'm gonna get into
another relationship,

I want to make sure
that I have the right match.

OK, so how serious is it
with Katherine?

She asked me
to take her virginity,

but I turned her down.

- Rusty.
- What? I left her
a bunch of messages,

but I haven't heard
from her yet.

Uh, you're never
gonna hear from her

'cause she is never going
to talk to you again.

You ran out on her
when she tried to lose
her virginity to you?

It wasn't because of her.
The circumstances
were completely wrong.

Rusty, she's gonna think
you thought she was fat.

- She's so not fat.
- It doesn't matter.
She's a girl.

She's mortified, and you
blew it. Case closed.

Can anyone tell me
what movie that was from?

- A-heezy?
- Can't Buy Me Love, 1987.

Yes! Today we're looking
at marketing in the 1980s

and how companies started
using movies to sell to teens.

Teens were finally
recognized for their
legitimate buying power.

They also flocked
to movies that could be
made on the cheap,

and all it took to market
them was one great pop song
on the soundtrack.

Can anyone name
one of these songs?

Anyone? Anyone?

Anyone?

Bueller?
Get it?

OK. Ferris Bueller...

Hey, so you're
absolutely positive

that I blew it
with Katherine?

Yeah. But doesn't that
solve your problem?

You are free to date Dana.

She is perfect for you
anyway.

Yeah, she's pretty great.

So what if she thinks
that I slept with Katherine,

and I haven't talked to her
since she told me she liked me?

- I'm gonna go for Dana.
- Oh, Rusty.

She thinks I think
she's fat, too.

Yeah, probably.

Hello.

Are you OK?

Yeah.

So I haven't seen you
in a few days.
How are you doing?

You don't have to
give me that pitying look,

like I'm some kindergartener
who came to school

with a maxi pad
around her knee because she
thought it was a bandage.

And if that did happen,
it would be a totally
honest mistake...

- Your finger's stuck?
- No.

Let me help.

Nothing happened with Katherine
after the Mardi Gras party.

- Really?
- No.

Even though
she's blonde and leggy

with high cheekbones
and a sure thing?

Yeah. That's right.

Uh, what I'm
trying to say now is...

Dana, will you go out
with me Saturday night?

I'll have to think about it.

I'm just kidding.

- Of course I will.
- Great.

I'm sorry, Case.

I just don't get why someone
as smart and amazing as Cappie

would want to stay
in college forever.

I understand wanting
to party and screw around
for a while.

I've done plenty
of that myself.

But I can't help but wonder
if maybe you weren't right, Ash.

What if we are
too different?

And what if we're...
not going to last forever?

No matter how much we try or
how much we love each other.

I don't want to be right
about that,

so you need to address this
with Cappie,

- head-on.
- OK, well, how do I
address someone

who says he might never
want to leave college?

He can't possibly mean that.
That'd just be crazy, right?

Would it? I mean, it's Cappie
we're talking about here,

and he definitely has
his own way of doing things.

And, didn't you kind of
already know that when you
got back together?

So why are you trying
to change him now?

You're right. I know.

I love Cappie, and I don't
want to change him.

But if we're on
completely different paths

and he stays here forever
we're never going to work,

which scares the crap
out of me.

Then you need to make him
understand that.

Cheap beer and
The Political Economy.

Wow, Evan, this is sad.

I am behind in my reading,
and I can't afford good beer.

I guess the economy and I
are both a bit depressed.

- About Rebecca?
- Mmm.

How could I have been
so stupid?

You know, buying her
that necklace with money
I didn't have?

I put my position
in the house at risk,

not to mention
my friendship with you.

And she slept
with someone else.

- You have any idea
who it was with?
- No. I don't really care.

OK, I care a little.

God, why, when beer is
called "something's best",
is it always the worst?

Good question. Hey,
Grant went to Michigan
to see Kylie Minogue,

so I'm flying solo
this weekend.

How about we go to
this, uh, '80s party?

Everybody Wang Chung
like a virgin!

Maybe if my jokes were better
she wouldn't have cheated.

Look, don't beat yourself up
about it, all right?

Everybody knows
Rebecca Logan's got issues.

For what it's worth,
I got the impression

that she really did
like you.

That's worth about as much
as a bottle of...

...Sandusky's Best.

Rusty!

Hey, Katherine.
I don't think you're fat.

Nor do I.

Oh, well, good. But you're
mad at me, though, right?

Well, I see my failure
to return all seven
of your voice messages

has not gone unnoticed.
Rusty, I'm not angry.

- You're not?
- Initially, I was.

It was very embarrassing.

But I realized that you were
completely right to withdraw
when you did.

The timing was completely off,

and for you to have the
restraint to realize that

in such a passionate
moment really was
the height of chivalry.

I'm completely mortified
by my actions,

and I'm hoping that
we can move past this.

Of course we can.

So I guess we got through
our first big fight.

You know what they
they all have speed bumps.

- Relationships?
- Furthermore, I think
we should take it slow.

- You know, no sex yet.
- No.

So do you have plans
tomorrow night?

- No.
- Great.

We can go to the Dobler's
'80s party together.

That's nice.
I never have any dates
for these Greek events.

Um, but I'm late
for my hierarchy
and hegemony seminar,

so we'll talk details
later.

I promise
I'll call you back.

I know how much you don't
want to talk about this,
but we have to:

graduation, our future,
all of it.

We have to figure it out.
I mean, I am graduating in May.

And I might be leaving CRU.

But you might
get into CRU Law,

- and then we don't have
to worry about it.
- But what if I don't?

- But what if you do?
- Cappie.

OK, look, if you go
somewhere else,

then we'll just do
long-distance.

But for how long?
For 20 years,
until you graduate?

- How will that work?
- Graduation isn't even
until May.

Why can't we just
deal with it then?

Because I'm not as good
at living in the now as you.

I just... I can't feel
comfortable in our relationship
not knowing where we're going.

- You might be going to CRU Law.
- But what if I don't?

- But what if you do?
- Oh, my God, Cappie!

You... You have to accept you
can't be in college forever...

Surprise!

April? Tobias? What the hell
are you guys doing here?

Whoa! Too early
for a philosophy quiz.

It's great to see you!

This must be Casey.
She's gorgeous!

- Hi.
- Amazing eyes.

Who are you?

- Oh!
- Oh! Uh, Casey, um...

These are my parents.

- Wow!
- So this is where
the magic happens, huh?

- Hurry up, Beav!
- Don't rush me.

- What color am I again?
- Red.

Damn it!

So, guys, I have
a little problem.

I seem to have found myself
dating two girls.

At the same time.

And that's not enough?

You want a different girl
for every night of the week?
Way to be greedy.

No. I think two girls
is one too many.

I think one girl's
one too many.

I really need
to figure this out.

Two girls liking me?
Yeah, never happened before.

It's like a syzygy
or something.

- Yeah, it is!
- No.

A syzygy is the
alignment of three or
more celestial bodies

along a straight line.

Never mind.

So, I need to figure out
which one is better for me

- and then go out with her.
- That sounds confusing.

- I say you just date them both.
- Never mind. Is Cappie here?

Uh, Spitter.

There's nothing wrong
with dating two chicks.

You just need to make sure
they both know
things are casual.

Keep saying
the word "casual,"

and make sure one never
finds out about the other.

- Lying helps.
- Beaver has a point.

And how are you ever
gonna figure out
which one you like more

- without dating both of 'em?
- That's true.

You really think
I can pull that off?

- Casual.
- Thanks, guys.

Oh, Beav,
I think Pledge Snuggie
is your next move.

Pledge Snuggie,

leapfrog Pledge Slanket
and get kinged.

- Ohh!
- Great effort, pledge.

Let's get out of here.
I don't want to run
into Rebecca.

Oh, no, she's not here.
She went to visit her mom.

- She did?
- Yeah.

So we don't have
to study at the union.
We can just stay here.

I only have an hour
'cause I'm meeting Cappie
and his parents for lunch.

Cappie's parents?

Yeah. They dropped in
for a surprise visit.

Sounds like
April and Tobias.

You know, they're
pretty much the stereotype

of the flaky hippies
who never grew up?

Don't be such a snob, Evan.

They seem really nice,
and Cappie adores them.

It explains a lot
about Cappie, huh?

I'm sorry. It's weird
for you to talk to me

about my relationship
problems.

Oh, are you and Cappie
having relationship problems?

Never mind. You can't be
objective about Cappie.

There's too much baggage
between you two.

Fair enough, but I can
be objective about you.

Listen, you're never
gonna be the aimless

and groundless kind of
people that they are.

And it is, it's fun at first,
but it's not real, you know.

And with them here,
you're gonna get
to see that firsthand

because I am pretty sure
they are still exactly

the same irresponsible people
they were back at camp.

Good day to you, Casey.

- Deep-fried Divinity Square?
- Yeah. Um, thanks.

Got the recipe from my
church potluck last week.

- Evan, you want one?
- Yeah, I'll take...

Wait, wait. Evan Chambers?

- Yeah.
- Evan Chambers, the violent
predator of Rusty Cartwright?

The betrayer of Cappie?

You'll get one of my
deep-fried snacks

when you pry it out of
my cold, dead hands.

This... This week sucks.

And does every ZBZ know
about Rebecca cheating on me?

Yeah. It really sucks to get
cheated on, doesn't it?

You're right. I'm...
I'm sorry, Case.

I probably deserve it.

You know, truth is,
though, Rebecca was
always upfront with me

about what she wanted,
and I was the one

that tried to force
the relationship into
something it wasn't.

Right.

- These maple bars are good.
- - I knew you'd like them.

I just love the smell
of maple, don't you?

Second only to the smell
of blue permanent marker.

- I, uh, saw
Katherine earlier.
- You did?

What did you say?
What did she say?

I didn't talk to her.
Duh!

You know, I just sort of
feel bad for her.

I mean, are you guys
friends now or...

- No!
- No? Why not?

Um... because
when I told her

that you and I
were casually dating,

she was really mad.
She yelled a lot.

She told me to go suck on
a lot of different things.
It was brutal.

Jeez. Well, I'm sorry
to hear that, Rusty.

But you know what?
You did the right thing,

and I'm sure she'll come
to appreciate your honesty

and the fact that
you didn't, you know,
just string her along

only to dump her later.
You know,
like some big fat jerk.

Oh, right.
Like a big fat jerk.

- Oh, hey.
- Case.

Hey, we turned pledge checkers
into pledge chess.

We haven't figured out
how to play yet.

Chess is hard.

I know it's not exactly
a future-oriented activity...

I get it. I know. I sound
like a broken record.

So why don't we just wait
to talk about this until
after your parents leave, OK?

- Sounds great.
- - Here they are, honey.

Oh, hey there,
Mr. and Ms...

Please. April and Tobias.
Sorry we're early.

I always lose track of
the time when I'm baked.

- Tobias.
- I'm kidding.

I love doing that.
People get so freaked out
by hippie parents.

Cappie, we just
stopped for gas,

and the attendant was
such an interesting guy.

When I told him I was visiting
my son and his lover,

he told me about this
fantastic campground
just a few hours from here.

Apparently
it's hidden away,

so no fanny pack-wearing
tourists

attracting bears
with their Twinkies.

So what do you say?

We skip lunch and go camping.
It'll be like old times.

- I brought my pan-flute.
- I can make my bulghar
burgers and my soy-mores.

Ooh.

Um, I don't really have
any equipment or...

It's OK. Guys, why don't we
just stick to lunch today?

Beaver! My brother
from another mother.

This guy!

It's your move, Cap.

Casey, I hope you don't think
we were being too pushy

with this whole camping idea.

We just thought it would be
the perfect setting

for us to have a serious
conversation with Cappie.

About what?

Future stuff.
We just have some things
we need to discuss.

The future? Really?

Um, you know what?

I am sure that I can
rustle up a sleeping bag

somewhere in the ZBZ house.

- Really?
- Let's go camping.

Oh!

- Hey!
- Hey, Ash.

Um, OK, which of these
do you like better?

I'm sold on the jellies,

but then I watched
Can't Buy Me Love last night,

and I was reminded of
the charm of ankle boots.

I was so born
in the wrong decade.

I have no idea.
I need to talk to you about
my dating situation again.

Oh. Well, perfect timing.

I spent all last night
watching movies,

pretty much the complete
works of Molly Ringwald,

and then Just One of the Guys
and Girls Just Want to Have Fun.

So I have watched many
complicated dating scenarios.

I am now an expert.

OK, then. Here's one:

Do you think it's possible
for a guy to date
two girls at once

without lying
and being a jerk?

Um, I think you know
how I feel about
that subject.

I know, and I don't
want to be like Fisher,

but it turns out Katherine
and Dana both still like me.

And Beaver says
I should date them both.

- You asked Beaver?
- Cappie wasn't there.

How else will I know
which one is the right choice
without dating them both?

Why can't life be easy,
like it is in those movies
you watched?

Hey, '80s rom-com
dating is never easy.

You might have to give
your underwear to a nerd,

you might have
to dress up like a guy

and then fall for
your best guy friend who
thinks that you're a guy.

And this was all before
people were allowed
to be gay in movies.

And then, on top of it
all, your parents
forget your birthday.

- Does that sound easy?
- No. So, what do I do?

I don't want to screw this up.

Rusty,
your situation is easy.

Dana is the girl for you.

Katherine isn't
the underdog girl who
dates the science nerd.

She's the imperious blonde
who dates James Spader,

the preppy jackass.

You're right.

I should stick with Dana.

It just feels right,
when I'm with her.

- That's important, isn't it?
- Of course.

So you know what you
have to do now, right?

You have to tell
Katherine the truth.

I know.

It seems mosquitoes
can't resist

my citrus vanilla
body splash.

Oh, you're getting eaten
alive. Thanks for being such
a good sport about this.

- You sure you don't mind
missing the '80s party?
- Not at all, not at all.

I mean, really,
the '80s were a dark time.

Trickle-down economics,
The Super Bowl Shuffle
earning a Grammy nomination.

Although I gotta say
I was looking forward

to seeing you in that Madonna
pointy cones... thingamajig.

Well, who says I didn't
bring it with me?

A joke? A promise of sex?
Things are getting
back to normal.

What say we get lost
for a few hours

while looking
for some firewood?

And miss more stories
about little Cappie?

- Not a chance.
- Yes, I'm very grateful
my girlfriend knows

that I wore hemp diapers
until I was five.

We didn't want to rush you,
hon, no matter what that
kindergarten teacher said.

That's why we started
homeschooling.

We moved around so much
anyway: Montana, Nova Scotia.

Then we got that job
with the theater company,

so we were all over
New England.

Lived in a few ashrams.

Mmm!

Oh, look, this is his
first grade picture.

Wow! Uh, my first grade picture

was of a bunch of little girls
with Hello Kitty barrettes

and Disney princess dresses.

Well, this was taken
in Vermont.

Then it was Panama,
and then Seattle.

A riverboat along
the Mississippi Delta.
I felt like Huck Finn.

I can't even imagine.

We moved down the street
when I was in sixth grade

and I...
I cried for a year.

Well, you can get used
to anything, so I did.

Well, um, that was a great
blast from the past.

But, April, didn't you
have something else
you wanted to talk about?

Besides the past?

Well, not just yet.
How about some music?

- Oh!
- Look. Here she is.

Oh, wow.

Oh, man. Is that Eddie Murphy's
outfit from Raw?

Jealous? What are you wearing?

- Uh, I'll just take
my socks off.
- That's weak.

I... I don't know. Maybe
I'm just not jaunty enough
for the '80s today.

I just keep thinking about
how I'm just the schmuck

who gave away that necklace,

which is now sitting
somewhere in Rebecca's room

just taunting me.

All right, look, I just
can't take it anymore.

We need to go retrieve
your manly dignity.

Rebecca's over you,
so now it's time
you got over her.

- Yeah? Like how?
- Like we get
that necklace back.

Cal, I'm not...
I can't do that, all right?

I'm taking the high road here.

But, I mean, if we were
going to go get it back,
how would that work?

We can't just walk up
the stairs at ZBZ, you know?

No, no. See,
I think I may have
someone on the inside

to get us into that
boy-free zone.

- You in?
- I'm in!

All right.

Schooled in manly dignity
by a guy in purple leather.

You know,
it's going to get dark soon.

Should we set up
the other tent?

What other tent?

Looks like
there's just one tent.

Awesome, awesome.

All that body heat
will keep us warm.

Don't worry, we'll give
you two some private time.

Thanks.

Mmm!
Dinner is amazing, Mr...

- Sorry. Tobias.
- Thank you.

Some more soy-mores?

Yeah, sure. Thanks.

- Mmm.
- Took me years
to perfect those,

but the bulghar burgers
are all Cappie.

He came up with
the recipe one summer

when we spent the entire year
at a converted wheat silo.

I was inspired
by my surroundings.

He even got $1,000
in scholarship money

from the Wheat Growers
Society of America.

- Really?
- You can get a whole bunch
of crazy-ass scholarships.

I mean, I got one for spelling,
one for being ambidextrous,

one for shaving "Stu's Steak
Shack" on the back of my head
for two months.

As vegetarians, we weren't
too happy about that one,
but we let it go.

He's such a smart kid.

You know, he has almost
a free ride to CRU.

Oh, oh!
He is really smart.

I mean, he has taken so many
different types of classes.

Knowing Cappie, he probably
has enough credits
to graduate already.

- Is that so?
- Cappie, why the rush?

Sounds like you're
kind of overextending
yourself here.

Stay at CRU until
you're really ready to leave,
no matter how long that takes.

Don't feel pressured by some
bourgeois four-year construct.

- Learning can be
a lifelong process.
- Mm-hmm.

- "Lifelong?"
- Yeah.

Mom, Dad, Casey,

I assure you
I have no intentions
of rushing myself.

But, I mean, how is that
even feasible?

Your scholarship money is
going to run out sometime.

We have an inheritance
from my father's
free-range ostrich farm.

He can stay
as long as he likes.

But why would you want him
to stay at a college forever?

I mean, that's crazy.

We believe that life
is about doing

what you as a person
need to do,

not what society
tells you to do.

I thought you were gonna
back off about this.

OK, well, I can't.
So, excuse me.

- Hi, Katherine.
- Hey, Rusty.

We need to talk about
our date.

Oh, OK. Is it a matter
of dress formality

or estimated time of arrival?
Because I'm very prompt.

No. I can't
go out with you.

I'm sorry.

But I'm dating Dana.

Is it because I'm weird?

No. Dana's weird, too.

OK. Is it because
I'm a whore?

Because I threw myself
at you, or...?

Oh, you're not a whore,
and no.

Well, I can't say
that I'm not...

...disappointed here, Rusty.

I thought I had
truly found my match.

Yeah, I know. I know
how important that is.

You know, I know
I came on too strong,

but I was so excited
about finding a fellow
amalgam like you,

you know, a Greek
who's also a geek.

I thought...

...that we had a unique
understanding of each other.

I know. We do.

And I thought,
you know, how perfect,

someone who would
really understand

if I got caught up at
a four-hour chapter meeting,

and who would totally not
make fun of me...

...when I get so excited
about just cracking open

a brand-new textbook.

I would understand
all that.

It does make sense.

I'm sorry it didn't
work out, Rusty.

Then I guess I'll be
going to Dobler's solo.

OK, wait, I might be
rethinking...

Goodbye, Rusty.

Crap.

What the hell
was all that about?

I thought we agreed
on putting a pin on
the future stuff for now.

Yeah, that's because
I thought your mother
was going to talk to you

about the future
like a rational person

instead of condoning
this idea you should
stay in college forever.

I don't see why
it's such a big deal,

especially since you might
get into CRU law school.

- But what if I don't?
- But what if I do?

Cappie, please!

We can't do this again.

Is your mom playing
Physical on the pan-flute?

Does she think we're
going to do it in here?

Probably, yeah.

Oh, my God.

I love you.

And I want to be with you.

But I don't know
how that can happen

if you never want
to graduate.

And beyond that,
I see so much more
out there for you.

You have the potential to
do something extraordinary
with your life.

So here we are again.

You want me to change
and I don't want to.

You don't, do you?

You're going to be
like your parents.

- That's what you want?
- Maybe, and what's
wrong with that?

And what's wrong
with growing up?

♪ Let me hear your body
talk, your body talk ♪

♪ Let me hear your body talk ♪

♪ Let's get physical,
physical ♪

Oh, back up. Evan Chambers
is your friend

I'm supposed to help
infiltrate ZBZ?
No way, no how.

Get out of here! I'm not afraid
to use this spatula.

- Come on, Dale.
- Yeah. How about some
Christian charity?

Don't use my faith as
a cheap ploy, Chambers.

And I'm not one of those
wussy, loving Christians, OK?

I believe in a scary God
who brings hellfire
to sinners like yourself.

Wow! Well, this is pointless,
so I'm just gonna go.

Rebecca can keep
the stupid necklace.
I don't even care.

- Wait, Rebecca Logan?
- Yeah.

Why didn't you say so?
I'd aid and abet
Satan himself

to bring down
that icy temptress.

Welcome to ZBZ.

- Cool.
- OK.

Um, so what's the plan?

'Cause we gotta
sneak past the girls,

so maybe we need
some kind of distraction.

I got that covered.

Hey, ladies! Snickerdoodles
in the kitchen!

Low-carb snickerdoodles!

Don't just stand there
admiring me. You've got
maybe five minutes

to sneak through the front door
and get upstairs
before they realize

these are made with
high-fructose corn syrup. Go!

Wow. Who knew Rebecca
was such a minimalist?

Yeah, well, you know,
when you have no soul

you don't crave the comfort
of sentimental knick-knacks.

You can't
even tell they're low-carb.

Dale should go on Top Chef.

- A-ha!
- - Fat-free potato chips, girls!

- OK, let's go.
- Guess what? They
have a laxative effect.

She kept this
from our first date.

- Why would she do that?
- Yeah, uh, I don't know.

Let's get the hell
outta here.

These snickerdoodles
taste carb-y.

- Are they?
- No.

Don't you lie to me, Dale.
This is my fifth one.

Would a loving Christian lie?

Dale, the girls left
the dining room table
a disaster.

- How impolite of them.
- Well, what are you
waiting for?

The table's not going
to clean itself.

No, it's not.

- Nah.
- OK, I think I screwed up.

I dumped Katherine,
but now I think
I shouldn't have.

Because breaking up
with her was like
breaking up with myself.

The Greek-geek amalgam.
I've never met one before.
What if I never do again?

What if this is my
only chance at finding
my perfect counterpart?

- Wait, what about Dana?
- I know.

If you really think
about it, though, isn't
Katherine a better match?

Hold up.

Maybe I've got this
all wrong.

Maybe Katherine isn't
the imperious blonde.

She just looks like one.
She is an underdog, too.

It's like in
The Breakfast Club

where you find out Molly
Ringwald has low self-esteem

even though
she's popular and hot.

Well, I don't think
any of that matters

because she's never
gonna talk to me again
after what I just did.

Eh, not so fast.

The romantic comedy isn't over
until the credits roll.

And even then, sometimes
there's a funny part
after the credits.

OK, Rusty...

...we have to find her,

no matter how impossible
it seems.

Even if she's about
to get married

or leaving
for a semester at sea,

or accidentally launching
herself into space.

I think she's just at
the '80s party at Dobler's.

Oh. Or that.

Yeah. Let's go!

Casey, wait up!

Oh, are you going
to the bathroom?

There's a bathroom?

Sure, you just duck behind
a tree and wipe with a leaf.

Oh. Yeah, I don't...
I don't really have to go.

Um, I just wanted to be by
myself for a little while.

Well, actually I wanted
to talk to you.

Is everything OK
with you and Cappie?

- We had a fight.
- Oh.

Anything
that can't be resolved?

For what it's worth, I know
it meant a lot to him

for you to come out here
tonight.

You're the most important
person in his life.

Thank you.

We moved around so much,

he had trouble bonding
with anyone other than us.

Sometimes I worry that it wasn't
the best thing for him.

The place he's lived longest
is the Kappa Tau house.

Well, Cappie's turned out
to be such a great guy.

I'm sure you had
a lot to do with that.

Thanks.

But you're the one now.

You're his new family.
You, and those boys.

You have been
a good sport.

I know there's a lot of other
things you'd rather be doing

than spooning with
a couple of aging hippies.

I could see that this is
really not your thing.

Well, I mean, that's
kind of what Cappie and I
were fighting about.

It seems like his thing
and my thing are different,

and we haven't
quite figured out
how to make that work.

Honey, he loves you
for who you are.

You can figure this out,
and I really hope you do

because he's gonna need you
now more than ever.

What do you mean?

Well, um, Tobias and I
are splitting up.

Tobias is telling him
right now.

Um... You're getting divorced?

Oh, no, hon. Uh...

We were never really married.

Except for that
Navajo ceremony,

but that was really
more of a group love thing.

Anyway, we're
going our separate ways.

But, um, why?

We've been fighting a lot
lately,

and Tobias has this
great opportunity in Austin
and I'd rather stay in Maine.

I don't know. Some things
just stop working.

The funny thing is,
as soon as we accepted
it was going to be over,

the fighting stopped.

The pressure was off.

But you guys seem to
really love each other.

Isn't that worth
fighting for?

Not all relationships
are meant to last forever,

even when
you're in love.

Some love stories
are short stories.

But they are love stories
all the same.

Oh, don't use these. They have
kind of sharp edges, OK?

See you back at camp!

I'm gonna go do some yoga.

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Ooh, yeah ♪

Oh!

I guess '80s bad taste
extends to beverages.

Here's to the closing

of the Rebecca Logan
chapter of my life.

That was
pretty convincing.

Why are you still angsting?
Is it that stupid ticket stub?

I can't start trying to
figure out her motives again.

You know?
It's too late.

Right. You need to move on,
all right?

You gotta find another
girl to talk to.

Like, uh...
Oh! Like her.

- What? Katherine?
- Yeah.

I don't know.
She's a little... intense.

You don't have to marry her.
Just talk to her.

Get back on your feet.

Yeah, yeah.

You know what?
You're right.

You're right. I'm just gonna
throw myself back out there.

All right.

Hey, Katherine!
You having fun?

I was going to say
I'm not really into parties,
but I won't.

Based on recent events,
I think I need to be
more of a people person.

Um, well, hey,
can I buy you a drink?

OK. A sloe gin fizz
would be fine.

OK.

Oh my God, Rusty, I got so
caught up in your love story

I forgot to put on my costume!

Really?

There. Flashdance.

OK.

Look, there she is
and she's alone.

Go talk to her!

Wait, wait, wait!
What are you gonna say?

Ash, if you don't mind,
I'm gonna go off script
on this one.

Ooh, improv. How '90s.

You're right.
You go, you see her,

you look her in the eye
and in that moment,

you just know.

Go.

Katherine!

Hey, sorry it took so long...
Rusty.

The preppy jackass!

What did you call me?

You heard me.

Now just excuse us.
I have to talk to Katherine.

Yeah, well, you just
called me a jackass, so...

Rusty, look, why don't you
just back off.

Evan's in a rough spot,
he sorta broke up with Rebecca.

Oh! So he found out she
slept with Beaver then?

- What?
- Ooh.

Beaver?
That piece of crap?

That's my brother
you're talking about.

Your brother can hardly
stand upright.

Rebecca didn't think so.

Evan, what the hell?!

You know what? You're right.
I feel a lot better.

The preppy jackass
strikes again.

♪ I don't give a damn ♪

♪ About the castle
on the hill ♪

♪ Or the gold
that we could eat ♪

♪ Or the horse
you have for sale ♪

♪ No, I'm getting
kind of rich ♪

♪ On the side of any soul ♪

♪ Well, I ♪

♪ I don't give a damn... ♪

Are you OK?

Yeah.

Evan and I have
kind of a history.

Oh, dear.

Can I ask... what you
wanted to talk to me about?

Oh...

I wanted to say...

Hi. Happy '80s.

Hi.

Happy '80s to you.

OK, see you later, Rusty.

Bye, Katherine.

Hey.

What happened?
Are you OK?

Yeah. Evan's a jerk,

but he stopped me
from making a mistake.

What do you mean?

I looked into her eyes,
like you said.

I realized that I wanted
a girl who spits her gum out
accidentally,

and wears a maxi-pad
around her knee,

and bakes really good maple bars
just to make me feel cozy.

A girl who that enough
confidence to turn me down flat

when I was dumb enough
to overlook her.

That doesn't even sound
like a real person.

It is.

Katherine and I are a lot alike,
that's true.

But Dana gives me something
more. She inspires me.

She's proud of who she is.
That's who I want to be.

That's who I want to be with.

Oh, Rusty!

Is that from
Adventures in Babysitting?

It's not from anything.
That's how I feel.

But I already left Dana
a message breaking our date.

So it's too late.

Maybe not yet.

I have one more movie idea.

Come on.

Moi?

So I guess you heard.

I'm so sorry, Cap.

You know, looking back at
the past day, all the signs
were there.

They weren't making out in front
of me nearly as much as usual.

Oh.

I'm sorry if I made
everything worse.

But there's something
I want to talk to you about.

Casey, I'm really not
in the mood right now...

Wait. Just listen, OK?

I'm sorry I tried to change you.
I won't do that anymore.

I can accept you,
just the way you are.

What about graduation? And May?

We'll worry about that
in May.

Dana! Dana Stockwell!

Crap. We forgot
the Peter Gabriel.

See if you can find
something on the radio.

Wait...

Yeah.

Dana!

It's Rusty!

♪ It's all I can do ♪

I made a mistake
and I'm really, really sorry!

We are back
and now with the weather...

- If you're there.
- Who're you Lloyd-Doblering?

You. Didn't you
get my message?

Oh! Yeah. About captions?
I agree.

- What?
- There was a lot of static,
but you said we needed to talk?

It sounded like
you like... captions?

I assumed you meant
for the written report

for the grant project.

The... Yes.
That is what I meant.

Captions will make the
illustrations so much clearer!

Did you need to talk to me
about anything else?

No.

That's the moment.

Hey, Ash.

Hey, happy camper!

Oh no, it was that bad?

Um... We camped.
We ate. We talked.

There was flute-playing.

And I finally woke up.

In a tent, right?
Was it really uncomfortable?

Uh, it was surprisingly
comfortable once I let go.

So, how are things
with Cappie?

Well, we're not fighting
anymore.

Oh, great.

This whole time I've been
trying so hard to get him

to wake up and face reality.

But really, it was me
who needed to face reality.

What do you mean?

Cappie and I aren't
built to last, Ash.

We work here,
in college.

And I don't think we'll
work anywhere else.

No. You can make it work.

There's... There's gotta
be like, a movie, or something.

Why did I put all my DVDs away?
Where's St. Elmo's Fire?

No, it's OK.
It's OK, Ash. Um...

I'm OK with it.

Cappie and I aren't a movie.

We're a short story.

But a really good one.