All language subtitles for Greek S02E13 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 H 264-CRUD_track3_[eng]

- Previously on Greek:
- First meeting as actives.

We get to be the guys
involved in choosing the next
generation of Kappa Tau.

I figured I'd walk into a
house and just know this is
where I'm meant to be.

And I thought I had when
I walked into Kappa Tau.

You hear? Iota Kappa Iota,
95 percent. Pretty good
for our first rush.

- Least we got some.
- 20 is respectable.

We're just gonna have to
give out some snap bids.

I hate to ask this,
but I need a rent check.

For the house?

Of course.

- Welcome to Titan Tower Apartments.
- Thanks.

I'll admit I was taken
aback when you added

two gentlemen roommates.
But these two look responsible.

Come on
Griffin, not again!

Dale, have you
seen my backpack?

- It's on the hook by the door.
- We have a hook by the door?

We also have a fairly awesome
set of nesting saucepans here.

Just figured we might as well
share the blessings

He hath bestowed
upon us, right?

Oh, that's where
the smell's coming from.

What? This is your
classic bluegrass scramble,

couple glasses of Sunny D.
Now that we're outta the dorm

we are gonna start every day
with a home-cooked meal.

You know, I actually need
to go to the bookstore.

Rusty, school supplies
can wait. We are 43 minutes

from walking into
hostile territory.

It's an Art History class.

Yeah, but we're highly
intelligent men of science

who use logic and reason
to make our decisions.

If we have to descend into the
land of liberal arts, so be it,

but I will not let you face it
on an empty stomach. I won't.

You're making
the right move.

Smell that.
Look how it congeals.

That'll set your day off.
Get a big gut-full of that.

So, what's in this?

Uh, you know... Eggs, butter,
sweet corn, country ham.

A little cheese product.

Although I did have to
substitute Spam for the ham.

And I couldn't
find any sweet corn

so I ended up usin'
sweet pickle relish instead.

Um, I really, really
need those supplies.

Come on!

Come on, come on,
give me a good number here.

Big money.

Stupid calculator.
I hate you.

We're already
cutting corners.

If we don't get some more
sisters in this house pronto,

we're going to have to...
raise dues.

Mmm-hmm...

- Hello, Casey?
- What? Sorry.

My women's studies
class, Sex, Power, and Politics,

starts today, and
I don't want it to be

a repeat of my
summer internship in DC.

So, I want to be prepared
and taken seriously,

so I thought I'd start the day
off with the Washington Post.

- You're reading the horoscope.
- As a warm-up.

Is our kitchen staff hiding
or did Frannie steal them, too?

- Good morning to you, Becks.
- Not if we have to bus and
wash our own dishes.

Have you seen
the kitchen lately?

A Friday mixer with the
Kappa Taus is one thing.

Living like them
24-7 is just gross.

Well, we can't really
afford a full kitchen staff.

But I did hire a student
hasher over the phone yesterday

- and he should be here...
- Sorry. Hey, I'm looking
for Ashleigh?

- What? Me. Hi, I'm Ashleigh.
- I'm Fisher. The new hasher.

- I'm Betsy.
- Uh, yeah.

Anyway, I'm late on my first
day, so I'll spare you the story

about my bike and the car
that cut me off and...

I'll just get to work.

OK.

- Oh!
- Oh, I got that.

There you go.

Oh, he's a keeper.

Welcome to Perspectives
on the High Renaissance.

You'll find your syllabus
next to the projector.

No labs, no equations
on the board, no board.

This class actually
doesn't look bad.

I don't know, man.
Aren't you a little curious

about the verbiage?
Liberal Arts?

It seems like it could
attract a certain element.

You know? Socialists,
tree-huggers, general deviants.

Hey, Calvin.

I barely slept. Again.
Griffin just kept doing it.

All night long.

I get that you people, most of
you people, want to have sex,

and that's fine. I don't care.
I just don't want to see it.

Or hear it. Or feel it

brushing up against my leg
in the middle of the night.

Let's get
started, please.

The word renaissance
means rebirth.

But as we focus
on the artists

of the 15th and 16th
century this semester,

one might argue
that it refers

to an exploration
of the flesh.

Correggio's
Venus, Cupid and Satyr.

- Those are boobs.
- Sums up my morning.

On your syllabus you'll see
that Correggio is our
artist for week one.

- Where do we get the syllabus?
- - For a taste of week two...

I'll get you one.

here is Leonardo's
Vitruvian Man.

Better.

Moving on
to week three...

Crap.

Sex, power,
and politics, please.

Thank God I'm not late. Pilates
class ran long this morning.

There was a traffic jam getting
on the reformer, so, you know.

Casey? What are
you doing here?

I should ask you
that question.

I'm just broadening
my horizons.

Or should I say
horizoning my broads? Ha.

- That was the teacher.
- Oh.

Good morning, everybody.

I hope we're all ready
to dive into the theme

of blurring traditional gender
lines in world politics.

You know, every year
there's at least one male

who tries to broaden his
horizons by taking this class.

Uh-huh.

That's me. Vive la femme!

Hi, how you doing?

And every semester, that
experiment fails. Miserably,

scholastically and otherwise.
So good luck to you, sir.

Now let's roll up our sleeves
and dig in to the Middle East.

So... Fisher.

What kind of motorcycle
do you have?

Is it a big fat hog?

Uh... No, it's a Triumph.

Oh. Does your girlfriend
ride on the back?

Excuse me. Ashleigh,
do you have a second?

Sure Fisher.
Um, girls?

Let's give them some privacy.

Uh, sorry.
They're weird.

Or, lonely.
Anyway, what's up?

OK, there's
something you should know.

I got fired from the last
three sororities where I worked.

And, this might come off
kinda arrogant. It's just that

every house
I've worked in,

the girls have... kind
of gone crazy. Over me.

First it's just flirting, but
it always evolves into stalking.

Anyway, the point is,
everywhere I go,

somehow I end up
being a distraction.

And, then I get fired.

Oh.

I mean, oh!

The reason I didn't tell
you in the first place

is I'm putting
myself through school

and I really,
really need this job.

So, could you maybe say
something to your sisters

- to get them to back off a bit?
- Yeah, sure.

Uh, no ZBZ sister
will bother you. Promise.

OK.

Did it look as bad
as it felt? Be honest.

Uh, it was pretty much
the worst public display

since Fergie wet
her pants on stage.

You know, incontinence
is a growing epidemic.

I'm dropping the class.

I'll take an elective in
literature next semester.

I'll never see any
of those people again.

- Hi.
- Until the next thing happens?

Then you're gonna
drop that class, too?

I mean, come on, Rusty.
Just drop out of society, then.

You know? Join that cult.
Get you three teenage wives.

'Cause fear is a downward
spiral that knows no bottom.

- Hello.
- Hi.

I just wanted to
make sure you're OK.

- Spill looked pretty painful.
- Wasn't as bad as it looked.

- You just said it almost...
- Dale! We gotta go.

- We have nowhere to go.
- Now.

It was
extremely cool you tried

- to help me out. Thank you.
- No problem.

I'm Jordan. I don't usually run
after guys to say hello, but...

- Oh, God, you're bleeding.
- What?

Oh. Oh yeah,
that's nothing.

So, what'd you
think of the class?

Um, it was my first class
actually. I just transferred.

I don't know anyone.
Not a soul.

Well now you know the guy who
face-planted in Art History.

- And bled a little.
- Very true.

All right. So now that you're
my first friend at CRU,

can you tell me where the
social science quad is?

Oh, yeah. Uh...

You see that brick building
way out in the distance?

- Uh-huh.
- Directly behind that.

Oh, no way. OK, I have
to run, like, literally.

- Are you gonna be OK?
- Yeah, thank you.

All right. I'll see you
in class Thursday.

I think I have a girl
crush on her. She totally
put you in your place.

A girl crush? You and
Professor Freeman?

Hold on, let me
get a visual here...

- Oh, you're aggressive! Oh...
- You're disgusting.

Oh, which reminds me,
your house better be clean

for the KT-ZBZ
mixers this Friday.

Since when are ZBZ sisters
worried about being dirty?

Hi! Max!

Oh, um, Cappie's
in my Women's Studies class.

Oh. That's an interesting
area for you to study.

Well, I love
studying women.

This guy...

- So Max, how's your beaker?
- My uh...

Well, I'm working with
a cement compound now, so...

So?

So we don't use beakers.
Not enough tensile strength.

- Yeah, me, too.
- I am so gonna be late
for my class.

- Weren't you going to walk me?
- Yes.

- Bye.
- See ya. Douche.

I'm sorry, did you
just call me a douche?

- What's that?
- You just called me a douche.

What? I didn't...

OK, the last time I saw
you, you said it then, too.

- I'm sure he didn't, Max.
- No, he did.

I not sure I like
what you're inferring.

- Implying.
- Exactly.

Hello! Late for class.

Education's important.
We're the future.

- Uh, we should go.
- Never mind.

Douche.

They're guys, Case.
That's what they do.

They act all tough
and call each other names.

Suck it, douche!
See?

Maybe. I just don't
want this to turn into

the same nightmare that
was Evan and Cappie last year.

Well, maybe that should
tell you something.

That I should do
something before it
spirals out of control?

That maybe God didn't
create the universe

for boyfriends and
ex-boyfriends to get along.

But this is
Max and Cappie.

They're great guys. They
shouldn't just get along,

they should be friends.
Is that not possible?

It's as possible as us finding
three girls to give snap bids.

We only have this
week to do it.

- Rusty?
- Hey. Beautiful night, huh?

The moon just lights
up the whole sky.

- Someone took a club drug?
- No, I met a girl.

She's beautiful,
and smart, and funny.

- Awe. That's great, Rus.
- Does she want to join ZBZ?

- I... I don't know.
- Well you should ask her.

Because we're unofficially
desperate for sisters.

Well, I don't really know if
she's the sorority type.

You said she's a girl, you said
she's beautiful, and you said...

What else did you say?

Do it, Rus. Before Ashleigh
calls you a douche.

And I will, bro.

Omicron, pi, rho, sigma, tau,
upsilon, phi, psi, chi, omega.

- And spicy ketchup.
- Where'd you score these?

Uh, in the fridge behind
Beaver's socks.

Well done. Have
some fries, pledge.

- Yes, sir.
- You should ask that girl out, Rus.

That's what my roommate does
and it clearly works for him.
All night long.

See, showing up at her dorm is
what freshman Rusty would do.

Sophomore Rusty
is a different guy.

Sophomore Rusty is patient.
He plays it cool.

He's not a stalker.
Oh, no.

He builds that foundation of
friendship, and he waits

for the fates to conspire
to create that perfect moment.

And he talks about himself
in the third person.

I'll just talk to her
in class, and see what happens.

I don't know, man. I'm with
Calvin. I think you should
just go for it.

- Always worked for me.
- You're a freshman, Andy.
Calvin's gay.

Women in college are
different, trust me.

You'll see, little Padawan.

You'll see.

Hey, Fisher.

I hope you don't mind
that I study down here.

I always get really...

restless in the bedroom.

- You know?
- Yeah, sure.

I'm so tired!
I could use a pick me up.

If I make the coffee,
will you... foam the milk?

Fisher.

Your girlfriend called. She said
she had another outbreak.

Yeah.

And she said to get
more ointment.

I'm tired.
Night everybody!

- Not exactly what I had in
mind, but pretty genius.
- Right?

So, your girlfriend's name is
Vivian, she studies design,

and you met her
last summer in Dayton.

Sounds like
a great girl.

I mean, aside from her
unfortunate, ah, condition.

Well, I wouldn't let
you date just anybody.

- Do you have a real girlfriend?
- Nope.

I don't have
herpes, either.

In case you
were wondering.

Awesome!

Yeah.

All right.

- You get back to work.
- Yeah.

Just getting my book, so I'm
really not looking.

Ah!

- Hey, man. Where've you been?
- Running late, Cal.

Oh, OK. Listen, man.

Griffin is a
total horn-dog.

- I don't even think he
goes to class.
- Hey. That's awesome.

No, it's not.
It's a nightmare.

I was wondering, since
you're my big brother,

and the president of
the fraternity,

you could help me get
me a different roommate.

Uh, it's probably
too late for that.

Uh...

What am I supposed to do?
I haven't slept in two nights.

Um... I don't know.
Buy some earplugs?

Evan...

Good morning, Max.

I know you called
me a douche yesterday.

Uh, I think you're paranoid
and a bit delusional

and, from the looks of it,
a hair over-caffeinated.

- One of these is for Casey.
- No duh. Are you always so
literal?

- Did you just say "no duh?"
- Are you always so deaf?

- You called me a douche.
- So, what'd you get her?

- Mocha, soy milk, three shots.
- Half-caf?

- She doesn't drink half-caf.
- She has since I've known her.

But maybe now that she's with
you, she needs the extra
caffeine to stay awake.

Or, maybe she just realized
she'd rather be alert

- than go through life like...
- Like what?

Like you.

What's going on?

- Nothing.
- Nothing.

Guys?

- We better get to class, Case.
- You'd better get to class!

Oh. Thanks.

You're welcome.
I'll see you later.

Notice the
satisfied posture,

the seductively-parted lips.

Is it hard to imagine

the state of the
Satyr's genitalia, so...

subtly hidden behind
the blue drapery?

See you all next week.

I can't believe
she didn't show.

I can't believe
I'm still awake.

Griffin and Jenna had another
marathon session last night.

- Is her last name Talia?
- Huh?

Jenna? Jenna Talia?

This class is getting to me.

I'm sorry I'm late,
Professor Summerfield.

I really don't want
to fall behind,

so is it possible for me
to watch your lecture online?

The Internet is where art
goes to die, young lady.

You're welcome to stay
and look at the slides,

but I can't help you
with the lecture.

I took notes. I can help
you through it, if you want.

You're awesome.

I'm awesome.

So, without looking
at your notes,

what do Kollontai, Suu Kyi,
and Meir had in common?

Besides being incredible
women and effective leaders?

Yes?

Well...
I believe if you look

at the political careers
of all three women...

the common thread is a strong
record of conflict resolution.

That's exactly right.

By the way, I'm available
as a study partner,

or for anyone who
just wants to spoon.

So generous of you to offer.

Thank you. So. Bear in mind
what we've been discussing.

It is a woman's instinct that
compels her to resolve conflict.

That's why these
women were so effective

at bringing opposing
parties together.

Great class, everybody.
See you next week. Thank you.

Deer in the headlights, Case.
They don't have a chance.

Maybe I'll even take
you up on your offer.

- Spooning?
- Studying.

- You free later today?
- For actually studying?

Where we
actually... study?

Dobler's, 2:00?

Drinking and studying.
Yes. That I can do.

Hi. You wanna meet me
for a late lunch?

So, this new concrete
would mean

any new road or freeway
would be, like,
20 percent thinner.

Which is interesting because
all the natural resources
you would save, like gypsum.

- This is really boring,
isn't it?
- No!

I like gypsum.

And I like you even more.

A kiss goodbye? Always tugs
at the heart strings.

- You are leaving, aren't you?
- Uh, no.

What are you doing here?

Um... I was invited
by Casey.

- To study. And drink.
- OK, so I invited you both.

So you two could talk
and resolve the conflict
between you two.

- You set this up?
- That is
spectacularly lame.

Maybe, but you can't
shake hands with
a clenched fist.

Indira Gandhi said that.

- That was not in our reading.
- It was in my horoscope,

in The Washington Post.

Never mind. The point is,
you guys could be friends,

and that's never gonna happen
unless you guys talk.

Cappie, why don't you
talk about whatever
your problem is with Max?

Let's just get it
out in the open.

- I don't have a problem
with Max.
- Cappie.

I don't.

Max? How about your
feelings about Cappie?

I'm fine with
my feelings about Cappie.

Come on.

The longer we avoid dealing
with this, the worse
it's going to get.

- Oh, I should get back.
- Yeah, good luck
paving that driveway.

Yeah, good luck with your...
extensive jewelry collection.

You know, the next time
you want a study buddy,

why don't you just
ask that frowny girl
with the overbite.

This one is called
Leda and the Swan.

It's from the Greek myth.

Zeus was in love with
this beautiful mortal
woman named Leda,

so he transformed himself
into a swan

and impregnated her.

Wait. She had sex
with a swan?
How does that work?

- Actually, it's an
anatomical impossibility.
- Hmm.

OK, what about this one?

This one
is called Danae.

Is she giving birth?

Apparently,
she's being impregnated

by a curtain
of divine rain.

Hmm. Well,
that makes more sense.

Our dog has sex with
our curtains all the time.

That's why my mom
bought blinds.

You know, I'm actually
really glad I missed class.

It's so much more fun
doing this with you.

I think Professor Summerfield
needs to, um... get out more.

- Or buy some curtains.
- Yeah.

OK, what's next?

- Can I ask you a question?
- Are you gonna ask me out?

Do you, uh, want
to join a sorority?

Um...

Hey, Casey.
What can I do for you?

Um, well...

I've been thinking. A lot.

About conflict resolution

and the challenges faced
by our great female leaders.

- Great.
- And I'm wondering
what they did when

the opposing parties

wouldn't even acknowledge
the conflict?

Well, can you be
more specific?

Well, um...

...it sort of involves
my boyfriend.

And another person
who is technically
my ex-boyfriend.

And, conflict ensues.

So you'd like to exploit
the principles
you learn in my class

for the sake
of your social life.

- Is that bad?
- Honestly, its nauseating.

But I was a girl
with a social life
not long ago.

Let's start with you.

Women are wired
to desire harmony.
It's in our DNA.

That's why we care about
things like world hunger
and the environment.

- Or spirit week!
- Or spirit week.

Men, on the other hand,
are more ego-driven.

Actually, that's nothing
like my boyfriend at all.

No, it's not personality.
It's DNA.

He's probably reluctant
to confront the problem

because he can't
see anything to gain
by doing so.

So I have to give them
each something to gain.

Either that, or get 'em drunk
and let them slug it out
in a basement somewhere.

After all,
boys will be boys.

- You going home?
- Yeah. Got a paper to write.

But I wanted to say thanks.
Ever since, uh,
Vivian and her herpes

came into my life
the other girls have
pretty much left me alone.

You've kind of been
my superhero.

Saving hot guys from
the clutches of horny
girls everywhere!

I meant temperature hot.

Is the air conditioner
even working?

- Uh, Ashleigh...
- Hey, guys!

- Hey...
- Hey!

Night!

Let this be a lesson.
Herpes can afflict
even the hot dudes.

But, Professor,
the triethanolamine
level

has nothing to do
with the agglomeration.

- If you'd just give me
a chance to show you...
- Butter nut crunch! Oh.

No, sir, I do not think
I'm a smarty-pants.

If I were a smarty-pants
I would tell you that...

I'll see you tomorrow.

Bye.

Every day
I try and tell myself

that working in concrete
is more than just...

...working in concrete.
But it just... isn't.

- Wanna talk about it?
- No. I just wanna be
with you.

- Then let me
feed you ice cream.
- All right.

And apologize for Dobler's.

I was so focused on getting
you and Cappie together

that I never really
figured out how
to get you to talk.

Well, I don't know we
have much to talk about.

But you're both great guys.
You should be friends.

- Why?
- Because...

Because...

Because it's nice
to have friends.

- I already have friends.
- But don't you want more?

You can never have
too many.

But he doesn't like me.

Why would I want
to be friends with him?

OK.

I'm in a relationship
with this amazing guy

who I really care about.

And I've got this friend,
who I dated, yes, and OK,

maybe he's sort of annoying,

but I really care
about him, too.

And... maybe
I'm being selfish,

but I don't want to have
to give up one of them.

I did that once before...

...and it sucks.

I just want to feel like
I can be your girlfriend

and Cappie's friend
all at the same time.

- So, it would make you
happy if we got along?
- Yes.

- That's all you had to say.
- Really?

I love you, Casey.

I love you, too.

So...

What do you want me
to do now?

Say it again.

I love you, Casey.

But I meant what do
you want me to do now
about me and Cappie.

Oh, um...

Come to the mixer
with me?

I can do that.

I love you, too.

Not bad. Not good, but...

It doesn't have that neglected
men's room smell anymore.

Look out below!

- Oh, my God.
- We gotta make
this thing go faster.

Hey, excuse me.
Do you have a water-based,

dry-glide silicone
in a moly spray?

- Moly?
- Yeah. The basic...

He's fine.
Let's mingle.

I have to find Cappie.

Dude, you're wearing
a skirt.

- It's called a sarong, moron.
- I'd call it a so right.

Oh, would you?

You made it!

Looks like a great party!

We always have the best!

- Beer bottle juggling guy!
- Awesome!

Kappa Tau's definitely
a unique experience.

But once you get to know it,
you can't help but love it.

I can tell.

There's my sister.
Come on, I'll introduce you.

Rusty, can I make
a confession?

- Sure.
- I'm a little nervous about
the whole sorority thing.

I don't usually make friends
with these kind of girls.

Or, really, any girls.

But that's the great thing
about the Greek system.

There's a place for everybody.
No matter who you are,

there's an entire house
full of guys, or girls,

who are ready
to be your friend

and support you
no matter what.

Wow. That sounds
kind of great.

It is. And if it's not
this sorority,
it'll be another one.

Don't stress about it.

Hey, Rusty.

- Who's your friend?
- Hey, Ashleigh, Casey,
this is Jordan.

- The girl I was
telling you about.
- Hi!

Hi, nice to meet you!
So you're interested
in joining ZBZ?

- Um, I think so.
- Cool!

♪ At your mother's house ♪

♪ And your father would find
My hand inside your blouse ♪

♪ But they tell me that
You're married now... ♪

Shape-shifter.

When last we met,
you looked suspiciously

like one of Frannie's
IKI clones.

Oh, that. I was just
spying for ZBZ.

Spying? What's
your next assignment,

wiretapping your dad's
satellite offices?

The only satellite
my dad has is attached
to the DVR at home.

He gave up
his Senate seat.

Yikes.

No longer
the senator's daughter.
How will we categorize you?

I've been giving that
some thought.

You know, it's been four
months since we broke up.

So, you can
officially categorize me
as... a friend.

The four-month rule.

I guess if we had
this conversation

two weeks ago
it would've been
totally awkward.

Timing's everything.

♪ Go on ♪

♪ Get it over with ♪

Where've you been?

Scouting the talent,
Spitter?

- Where are the Jell-o shots?
- Uh, here!

Whoa, a non-greek
at a greek mixer?

Not in my backyard.
Sorry, Case.

- Cappie...
- No, you know how persnickety

the interfraternity
council can be.

You don't because you're not
Greek. I don't make the rules.
I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, Max.
Excuse us.

- I'll be right back for you.
- Screw the rules, Cap.

Including the one that says
you and Max can't get along.

Good God, woman, are you
on repeat with this?

Listen to me. You are my
friend, and I care about you.

But Max is my boyfriend.

If things keep going this way,
and if I have to choose

between you
and my boyfriend?

Then, I'm sorry, but I'm
going to end up choosing him.

What? Did he give you
an ultimatum? Like Evan?

No, he didn't,
but I'm giving you one.

If you care, at all,
about our friendship,

you'll figure out
a way to make this work.

Please.

♪ Love generator ♪

♪ My love generator ♪

The time has come.

Spitter,
where are you going?

- To make my move.
- Nice!

Go for it!

All right. Everybody out,
now. Let's go!

- Let's go!
- Let's go, come on!

Rhino?

- Listen, Cappie...
- No, just let me think, OK?

I gotta figure out how
we're going to... bond.

Um, we can get drunk.

No, we'll end up
getting in a fight.

Wait. You know, that's not
a bad idea. We could fight.

That's how we bond.

- Like in Fight Club.
That's brilliant, right?
- Cappie...

All right. Max,
I want you to hit me.

- As hard as you can.
- I don't think getting
bruised and bloody

- is what Casey wants.
- Good point.

We'll stick to the body.
Just nothing below the ribs.

Actually, avoid
the ribs altogether,

I'm kinda sore
from Pilates. So...

I'm not going to hit you.
That's the stupidest idea.

- I don't hear you coming up
with anything.
- 'Cause you won't shut up!

Well, if you would just...

Look, I get why
you don't like me.

I'm this weird,
sort of quiet guy

who's usually in his head. I
don't have your sense of humor,

- or...
- The mumbling,
that's really annoying.

Meanwhile, you know Casey's
just about the greatest girl
you could ever know.

And I'm the one
who brings her coffee.

That probably sucks.

There's no way we're going
to be friends, is there?

- No.
- Then let's try something else.

- Hey.
- Hey!

Hey! What can I say except
mazeltov, my little Golda Meir!

- You were right.
This guy's awesome!
- No, no.

- This guy is the awesome one.
- No, no. You shut up. Shut up.

- You...
- Stop it!

What happened?

- Well...
- It was like you said.

As soon as we got
a chance to just talk...

We figured out it was just
a big man-crush. Right, pal?

- A man-crush.
- Just a big man-crush.
That's all it was.

- Oh, sorry.
- Is it fine? It's fine.

Look, how about we go get a
beer, you big bag of douche!

Oh.

Ah! He called me a douche.
That's hilarious.

You...

- You think they bought it?
- Dude, we were spot on.

- Men are the worst liars.
- Seriously.

At least they're
trying, though.

I guess part of being
a great leader

is knowing you can't
change human nature.

Sometimes you have
to just tame it.

♪ Did you come up to me so
your life would be cheaper... ♪

Hey! There you are.

OK, Ashleigh told me that
ZBZ's gonna offer me a snap bid.

I don't know what that is, but
I think it means they want me.

- How cool is that?
- Pretty cool.

Thank you so much. I was totally
lost here until I met you.

Hey, Jordan. We're heading back
to the house. Come check it out!

- See you in class, right?
- See you in class.

♪ Or did you follow me home ♪

♪ 'Cause you're
scared of the dark? ♪

♪ Did you? ♪

Kick-ass party, huh?
I love this place.

Hey, did your girl
ever show up?

Tough break, man.
I just met this awesome chick.

- So cool.
- Go get me a beer, pledge.

- Yes, sir!
- ♪ Ohh... ♪

♪ Ain't it funny how you
wake up runnin' ♪

♪ When it felt so right
last night ♪♪

Hey. What are
you doing here so late?

I got an 8:00 AM class,
so I figured I'd get
my work done now.

- You want me to come back?
- No.

I need to go to bed anyway.

Superheroes need
their sleep, too.

Oh...

- I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry.

- Well, sleep well.
- You, too.

I mean, when you,
eventually, go to sleep.

I don't want to be
a superhero anymore.

I want to hang up my cape.

- What about Vivian?
- Well, she called.

Said she wanted
to break up with you.

- What's going on?
- You want to tell him?

There's actually two
girls in Ohio named Jenna Talia.

We found 'em on my Christian
social networking site.

That's not what
I was talking about. Uh...

I was just gonna crash
here a couple nights.

You know, hope Griffin gets
tired. That way, I can catch
up on some sexless sleep.

I think its
safe to say there'll be
no sex in this apartment.

Awe, thanks, buddy.

Did something happen
at the mixer?

I just don't get how it's
so easy for some guys.

Like all they have to do is
exist and they get the girl.

It's a gift. But, you
know. Heavy is the crown, too.

- Hello?
- What is this?

That's an Arkansas Shipwreck.

You take leftover bluegrass
scrambler and leftover

tuna casserole and just
kind of mash 'em together.

- What do you think?
- It's not that bad.

Yeah, OK.

Sorry, guys.
I gotta go.

All right.

Thanks, Cal.

You OK?

- Yeah, I'm all right.
- Where's your car?

I think it got stolen.

- The Iron Man car?
- Yeah.

You call the police?

I did, yeah. I mean,
I talked to them.

They'll find it, right?

Let's just go.
Let's get out of here, man.

Dude, what's going on?
Seriously.

- Hey, don't forgot your bag.
- Thanks.

- Uh... I'll call you tomorrow?
- Yeah.

Evan.

I don't know
what I'm doing.

Just drive, man.
Let's just get out of here.