Original subtitles

- Previously on Greek: - You are my little brother, so trust me.

- Take this back. - Going back to Omega Chi.

- So Evan wins. - We said we weren't gonna let our houses get in the way

- of us being friends. - You did nothing.

- It was a prank! - I used to see everything

in terms of whether it would piss off my parents.

I just didn't want people to think I was dating you to get to her.

Calvin, you like Michael, right?

- I think so. - Gentlemen, it's time to get your fake IDs.

Chad Stewart.

Oh! Whoa. I'm not interested in being anyone's warm body.

I'm gonna go tell Casey I'm an idiot and I want her back.

Casey wants us to be friends, and I said I was on board,

but I don't think I am.

Did you pay Shane Mullen to stay away from me?

- OK. Yes. - How could you be so spiteful?

- I didn't do it to be spiteful. - Then why?

- Because I love you. - I think you should take some time.

- Get your head together. - We're done here.

Maybe instead of trying to keep all the guys away from one girl,

find a girl who thinks you're the only guy in the room.

So why do you want to be a lawyer?

It was easier to follow Evan's path.

I know what kind of law I want to practice:

None.

Hey, Dale. Can you pick up my mail while you're... You're packing?

It's spring break. Why would I not be?

I assumed that you were gonna be sticking around campus.

I need a break, Rusty. You know, I'm not a machine,

contrary to what my academics imply.

So while you're submerged in surf, sand and sin

with your fraternity brothers in South Carolina,

I am gonna be engaged in something far less reckless in Virginia.

You're...

- I have no idea. - Wild turkey hunting with my family.

Killing turkeys is safer than going to the beach?

Are you familiar with the dangers of spring break?

I mean, drunken injury? Pregnancy? Parasailing gone awry?

And what about the people injured or even killed while hunting?

They're just morons.

Dale, come on. This is spring break.

This is the most sacred of college traditions.

Why waste that on your parents?

Do something with your friends,

like take a road trip to warmer weather.

As if it ever gets that cold here.

All right. Well, have fun killing turkeys, Dale.

Have fun perpetuating stereotypes of wasted, reckless, youth, Rusty.

Two minutes, girls.

And windows... check.

The house is officially ready for lockdown,

which means in two minutes I am officially on spring break!

Woo-hoo!

I can feel the weight of my presidential duties

- lifting from my shoulders. - Well, could you put it on my suitcase?

We're going to Myrtle Beach, not a year-long expedition to Mars.

I have to bring everything that Teresa bought me.

- Teresa? - Teresa Visa. She's very generous.

But your card is a Credit Plus.

I know, but nothing cute rhymes with Credit Plus.

- There! - Think this will fit in your car?

Lucky for you, I packed light.

All I need is sunscreen, a sarong and an iPod filled with beach music.

I'm leaving the rest of my baggage behind:

Literally and figuratively.

Well, no Jimmy Buffet.

We have plenty of time to listen to him when we are old and sad.

OK. No Buffet.

No ex-boyfriends. No Zeta Beta business.

And most of all, no worrying about the gaping hole that is my future.

I plan to flirt with boys

and check things off the spring break list.

Oh, my God! Where did you find this?

In my old beach towel. Remember when we made these freshman year?

We were such wide-eyed spring break virgins.

There are still things on here and I'd like to finish it.

- Oh, like what? - Playing a drinking game,

entering a contest and skinny dipping.

Ooh, Casey Cartwright gone wild!

Oh, it's time.

Let's go, let's go, let's go!

- Spring break awaits! - Woo-hoo!

OK. Five, four,

three, two, one!

Lift off!

Spitter! Hurry up! You're wasting valuable party time! Get in here!

Welcome aboard.

We know you have many choices in travel and we thank you for choosing Kappa Tau Air.

- I love this bus. - This bus has taken the Kappa Taus to Myrtle Beach

for 32 spring breaks in a row. It is a legend.

Pledge Cartwright will be serving chips and fries in the main cabin.

And this bus makes only five stops

and five stops only for gas.

- What about...? - Only for gas.

This is so cool.

- Come on. - Let's go!

Come on, come on.

Yeah!

Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

Hey! Wait for me!

Spring break! Woo-hoo!

Final answer. Final answer!

Excuse me. Hi, we're checking in.

Ahoy, mateys, welcome to the Yacht House Inn,

where your vacation is shipshape. How may I help you?

Reservation under Zeta Beta Zeta, CRU Chapter.

Two rooms for the week. Enjoy. I said, "Final answer!"

I think there's been a mistake. We have five rooms reserved.

Uh, no you don't.

Well, then we'll take three more rooms, please.

And you can put it on the card.

We're sold out, suge. I don't know if you've heard, but it's spring break.

Connie?

We'd like some ice in my room, please, and a few extra towels.

- Yes, Miss Logan. - Rebecca, you're here.

- And so are you, finally. - How did you beat us?

We took her father's jet and it was awesome!

And Daddy's travel staff booked us this huge suite.

You should come up to our floor later.

Rebecca, wait up. Um...

There's been a minor snafu with our reservation.

Would you and the pledges be willing to share your rooms with us sisters?

After all, nobody wants to sleep on the floor.

Um, actually we're going to use this week to bond as a pledge class.

Having sisters in the room would change the dynamic, so...

No problem, little sis. Who plans on sleeping anyway?

Check out this dingy motel.

This is even dingier than I imagined.

Oh!

- Was that a...? - It was a car backfiring, probably.

Whoever wants to hit downtown, we're leaving ahora!

Isn't this place great? Only $199 a night!

Spring break!

Hey, has anyone seen my bag?

Coming through! Coming through!

Watch the outfit!

Hey, oh! That's a brand-new flip...

- ...flop. - Sorry.

I've got these giant clown feet that aren't always under my control.

Giant feet. Yeah.

How about let my flip flop make it up to yours.

- How did you... do that? - It's my secret weapon.

So, uh, double-fisting tonight, huh?

No. Just... just single-fisting.

I mean, I'm single. Just an FYI.

Well, then I hope to see you around.

You will.

Where have you been? That beer run was more of a marathon.

I just met the man I'm going to molest.

He is crazy gorgeous and super generous.

He opened our beers with his shoe.

- Ah. - What's up, Casey?

- Hey! - Awesome.

- So who is he? Where's he from? - No clue!

That is the great thing about spring break!

All new boys to play with.

Ooh, please tell me it's not the guy in the doo-rag.

- I know how you love men with accessories. - No! OK.

Where the hell is he?

I'm sure he's around here somewhere.

- He's like Bigfoot. - No.

He's the Hot Ness Monster.

Now, this... this is a party!

It's great, huh?

It's like an Omega Chi party, only with less clothes.

Yeah. And that, my friend, that is the beauty of spring break.

Woo-hoo!

Wow. Some pretty chilly body language.

Yeah, well, I think I'm ready for a new conversation, Cal.

- Happy spring break, Evs. - Right back at ya, Frannie.

Oh. Uh... Keep moving. Nothing to see here.

- Wishing you'd taken the jet? - And miss Beaver moon a state trooper? Never.

Our spring break pilgrimage is a sacred tradition.

Well, if you want a ride home, the skies are very friendly.

Miss Logan, you're putting my tray table in its upright position.

Let's go for a walk on the beach.

Uh, but I was gonna meet the boys out.

We're gonna go to a bar with all-you-can-drink beer

- for five dollars. - You spent all day with them on the bus.

It's happy hour. You should come with us.

Look around. We've got you, me,

the moon, sand, surf. Pretty romantic, right?

Spring break's for being rowdy, not romantic.

Our romance is often rowdy.

I guess I can take a little stroll.

Great! I'll grab my jacket.

- I'll grab a beer. - OK!

Well, well, well. If it isn't President Cartwright.

Actually, it isn't. Tonight I'm just Spring Break Cartwright.

With patented dual beer grip.

- Uh, here. A gift. - Thank you. I love gifts.

Enjoy. I've got to get going.

- We're playing Thumper. - A drinking game? With your gag reflex?

It's on my spring break list.

Oh! Blast from the past. So you're gonna pierce your belly button again?

Once was enough, thank you.

I'm just tackling some unfinished business.

Like Thumper. You in?

You might want to find an easier target.

Is anyone easier than you?

Oh, how I would love to prove you wrong,

but I promised Rebecca a walk on the beach.

Oh, well, very romantic.

- Am I interrupting something? - Not at all.

Enjoy your walk. Yeah!

Maybe we can spend two hours.

Think of how far we've come.

- I just want to dance it out. - I need to see IDs.

What? I'm a really good dancer.

OK, get ready. Chad Stewart. 2343 Homer Terrace.

Sunshine, Florida. 47283.

Chad Stewart? The musician?

- No. - Hey, Spitter. Isn't that you?

We can say that guy stole your ID.

- We'll totally back you up. - What are the odds?

- I can't go in now. - Well, we'll just go somewhere else.

- Yeah. - No. It's OK.

I'm gonna go back to the motel.

I'll rest up for tomorrow night, I'm gonna go bananas!

- Yeah. - All right, man.

- Good luck, Spitter. - IDs, please.

- Guys, come on! - Look at that line.

There's no way we're waiting in this line.

Ladies, hi. Hello.

So we are looking for someone to buy drinks for.

Blueberry barnacle with a vita-boost, please. Thank you.

I don't know what I was thinking. That was at least, like, 50 yards or something.

This shirt does not work. Hey!

Sorry I missed you last night, Spitter.

Did you and the pledges get rowdy?

- You OK? - Just a little asthma flair-up.

If you need anything, let me know.

OK. Will do.

Mm. Healthy.

Cheers.

- Hey. - - Hey, are you in Myrtle?

- Are you having fun? - Things are fine.

I'm just sitting on the beach.

Uh, just relaxing from a full night of partying.

- Are you using your inhaler? - No.

You're so using your inhaler.

- Liar. - Fine.

- I'm using my inhaler. - I meant about you having fun.

I just kind of expected this to be kinda the most amazing time of my life.

It's the New Year's Eve Syndrome.

It can't always live up to the hype. I blame the media.

I've been up since 4am, when the rest of the pledges got home from that club

that I couldn't get into because of stupid Chad Stewart.

- Who's Chad Stewart? - I have no clothes.

I have no travel guide.

And, for some reason, my stupid asthma's back.

But, I mean, the worst should be behind me, right?

Are you wearing sun block?

- Any spottings? - No. The Hot Ness Monster is an elusive beast.

What do you think, Mandi. Over there?

Prime real estate.

That'll do, thank you.

Ugh, Tropical Storm Rebecca.

I slept in the bathtub last night because of her,

and now she's ruining our boy view.

Why can't she get over it?

Have you ever considered she might be threatened by you?

Why? She's the senator's daughter with the invisible jet.

Because you're Zeta Beta president.

- You're beautiful. - Go on.

You're the ex-girlfriend to a certain Cappie,

with whom you looked pretty chummy last night.

Hey, spring breakers! In about five minutes,

we start the sand castle contest.

Winners get free drinks at Club Paradox!

- Whatever. - Cappie and I are finally friends.

Truly. I'm over him.

Just like I'm over drama, remember?

Which means I'm not gonna let this beached whale get me depressed.

Let's go build a sand castle!

I don't want to get my bikini wet. Display purposes.

Oh, come on. Entering a contest is on my list.

Oh!

You seem to not be enjoying the parade of possibility.

Uh, it's not really my kind of parade, you know?

Right.

Well, you know, we could go to the gay bar around here.

They have cages.

Well, that was a lot of information.

When Casey and I came down here our sophomore year,

- she wanted to go... - Oh!

She heard they had cages you could dance in. So we went.

Well, thanks for the offer, but I'm not looking for a guy.

I miss the one I already have.

You remember when you're so excited about someone

you want to spend every moment with them

to make up for the time you're not together.

Oh, man. Look, I'm sorry.

No, no, that's all right.

Hey, stud!

- You up for some volleyball? - Absolutely.

Come on. What do you think? It'll be fun.

- I don't know. - Well, my friend thinks you're cute.

Yeah, no. Uh, you go. Have fun.

- Are you sure? - Yeah, go on.

All right.

Ah, Michel.

Attention passengers...

You're sure you have to go?

Yeah. Honestly, I totally forgot that I have this project due

for my polymeric materials class. It's due on the Monday we get back.

Damn the competitive world of polymer science.

Well, don't be too hard on yourself. You can't win 'em all.

- Right. - Well, travel safe, Spitter.

I got you a little gift for the road. I'll see you next week.

Ow!

It's all right.

No way.

- Hello? - Rebecca Logan?

- This is she. - I'm calling from The Washington Post...

No, thank you. I don't need a subscription.

- Miss Logan? - Look.

I'm in college. I have no need for a newspaper.

Actually, this isn't about a subscription.

There's a matter we'd like to talk to you about if you have a couple moments.

Isn't this fun?

I haven't built a sand castle since I was 12.

Back when my biggest burden was having to play with Rusty.

Yeah, I just wish there wasn't all this sand.

It lingers in places long after you leave the beach.

I think the Hot Ness Monster has breeched the surface.

Well, go get him!

I got it!

- Hey! - Sorry about that, Case.

Uh, can I give you a hand?

Actually, I could use a torso.

Well, lucky for you, I'm well-versed in torsos.

You sure you have time? Rebecca's not planning another walk on the beach?

I've got all the time in the world.

As long as we're done by five. She booked us a banana boat ride.

A banana boat? You?

I'm man enough to ride a giant yellow phallus.

Besides, it's Rebecca's first spring break.

I vaguely remember you riding one your freshman year.

All right, it was the first thing I crossed off my list.

I guess it's the circle of life.

It's really good to see you so...

...relaxed. You're like your old self again.

Thanks, Cap.

But your mermaid is in dire need of a breast augmentation.

I'll be right back.

Rebecca! Wait up.

- Hey, Cap. - Where are you headed?

Back to my room. Thought I'd take a nap.

- Want some company? - No. Um...

- Go, have fun. - Hey.

- Are you OK? - Why wouldn't I be?

Excuse me.

Folks, just got off with dispatch.

We should have another bus to take us back in about six hours.

Thanks very much.

Hey, Calvin. Where are you going?

Gotta be a town up ahead.

I was gonna head over and find a car.

Oh.

Calvin, can I go with you?

Suit yourself.

♪ Baby, don't cry What you in a hurry for? ♪

♪ Slow it down Slow it down ♪

♪ We are wild and young ♪

I think... I think we need another round.

- OK, I'll go get them. - Let us contribute something.

Uh, what are you gonna contribute?

Thank you. Thank you for your contribution.

You're welcome.

I'll get the drinks.

Frannie!

- Frannie! Hey! - Hey.

- What's up? - This place is wild!

I know. Look how packed it is.

Yeah. And I bet you've met

a majority of the female population.

Hey, you wanna come hang out with us?

Oh, no, thanks. You go have fun.

OK.

♪ What happened to the day We do what we wanted to do ♪

♪ Slow it down Slow it down ♪♪

I need to rent a car, please. Um, just one-way to Cyprus, Ohio.

Well, I'm gonna need to see your driver's license and a major credit card.

Sure.

When did you get your own credit card?

Oh, hun, I'm sorry. You gotta be at least 21 years of age

to rent an automobile in the state of North Carolina.

So I can die for my country but I can't rent a car?

I've heard that one before. I'm sorry, the law's the law.

Uh, I'll get it.

And this is faker than my hair color.

What? No, it's not.

There's no way on God's green earth that you're 24.

I am.

My name is Chad Stewart.

I live at 2343 Homer Terrace.

- What color are your eyes? - What color?

- That's what I thought. - Damn it.

I'm gonna need to confiscate this.

Take it, 'cause it's cursed or something.

Rusty, when did you get a fake ID?

- We shouldn't have left the bus. - This isn't my fault.

I didn't invite you to join me.

I didn't want to let you walk off in the dark alone.

Gee, Rus, I feel so much safer now that you're here.

Fine. You're on your own. I'm gonna get my own ride home.

Fine. Just how I wanted it.

♪ We are wild and young ♪

♪ We are wild and young ♪

♪ We are wild and young ♪

OK. Your target is about six-foot-two,

brown hair, dreamy eyes.

And he's got a bottle opener in his flip-flop.

Could you be a little more specific?

Check your phones.

Yesterday, I got close but was thwarted by a rogue football game.

Luckily, I was close enough to snap a cell phone pic.

I've texted it to each of you.

Ash, this is just a blob.

A hot blob, and we must find him.

But be warned, he's elusive.

So if you spot him, pin him down and text me immediately.

- Are you sure...? - There's no time!

♪ We are wild and young ♪

- Hey Cap. - Hey.

Have you seen this blob?

Maybe it's hanging out with Rebecca somewhere.

- Birds of a feather... - I can't find her anywhere. She missed the banana boat.

Well, I wouldn't worry too much. Rebecca's a big girl.

♪ We are wild and young ♪♪

It's time for the event you've all been waiting for.

Let's hear it for our spring break wet T-shirt contestants!

I might be able to take a break for a sec. Recharge.

We want boobs! We want boobs!

No. No, you don't! No. Rebecca!

What the hell are you doing?

Hey, Cap! I'm gettin' rowdy!

Get down from there.

Set those glorious mounds free!

Mounds? Really?

Fine. Almond Joys!

OK, Rebecca, you need to get down.

Rebecca, get down from there. You're making a scene.

Uh-oh. Big sis is pissed.

You gonna tell my parents?

What I do on spring break is none of your business.

It is when you're wearing ZBZ letters.

- Fine, I'll take them off. - No!

Let me get my camera first.

You're seriously doing this? This is really beneath you.

Beneath me?

- You know what's beneath me? - OK, don't do this. Not right now, please.

- You're beneath me. - Whenever you're ready.

You can't even get over your ex-girlfriend.

- Hey, don't bring me into this. - You've always been in this.

And you always will be.

Maybe you should get up there, too.

Yeah. No.

Wasting the last four months on you.

Stop acting like a spoiled daddy's girl

who didn't get her way. It's a cliché.

You know what? We're done.

Consider this our spring breakup.

Rebecca!

- Don't go! - Rebecca.

You chased the boobs away!

Are you OK?

- Hey. - Chambers!

Man, where have you been?

What? You know, I made some new friends.

Friends? As in plural?

You guys, Chambers is on a roll!

- Whoo! - All right, settle down.

What's going on? You guys going to the condo?

No. What are you, my grandpa?

- We're going to Paradox. - No.

No, no. There's no way I'm going back to that club tonight.

Wanna raid the vending machine?

- Sounds so good. Let's go. - Yeah?

Yeah.

I'm sorry you had to drive all this way.

No.

You can take us to the nearest bus station if you want.

No, I'll drive you guys back to Cyprus. No big deal.

What about the hunting trip with your parents?

Uh, apparently my mom's been hitting the firing range

pretty hard and has developed quite an ego.

All right, Rusty, do you wanna tell your side of the story first?

Not really. We've got four more hours to go,

It's been a long day. Let's get back to school.

All right.

Anybody hungry? I got some turkey jerky in the trunk.

- I'm starving. - Did you kill it?

Does it matter?

All right, Calvin, you wanna jump out and find that jerky bag?

Trunk food. Yum.

Dale, I don't see anything back here.

It's back there.

Would you go help him?

Dale, there's really nothing back here.

I'm not letting either one of you jokers back in until you work out your issues.

You feeling better?

Feels like my brain is taking clogging lessons.

I was worried about you. You got hit hard.

Yeah, and then the drunk guy punched me.

Do you have any idea why she...?

Can we not talk about Rebecca? It was awkward enough before all this.

You know what, you're right. We're on spring break!

- Woo-hoo. - Whoo!

We get to spend an entire week on the beach with our best friends.

- I mean, there's only one more of these... - One more? Speak for yourself.

And then they kick us out into the harsh reality of 40-hour work weeks.

Forty hours? Wake up, Mary Tyler Moore. Try 80.

In cubicles. With two weeks vacation.

By the way, did I tell you I'm switching my major?

Anatomy was fun but less hands-on than I expected.

- I'm sorry, Cap. - About what?

The fact that I don't have a "plan"?

About the fact that I judged you for it.

I was wrong.

- What has gotten into you? - What do you mean?

You're so nice and carefree and beach-babe beautiful.

I feel like I'm in a tampon commercial.

That's because in four days I have to go back to school

and figure out what I wanna do with the rest of my life.

What about that ten-year plan?

Let's just say I copied off of someone's else's paper.

And now I don't know what I'll be doing in ten minutes.

I'm staring out into the vast empty ocean

that is my future.

Feels good, doesn't it?

It does.

And it feels, um...

...terrifying.

- ♪ Lend your heart ♪ - Dale, please unlock the doors.

No can do, buddy. Not until you two make amends.

Look, either turn off the music or leave us out here to die.

The scary thing is I actually knew the words to that song.

Look, I just wished you would have at least called

after the prank war thing.

Do you want to know why I didn't?

Because I was mad. You made me feel like the bad guy

because I chose to stay with Omega Chi and the other friends I have there.

Like Evan Chambers?

When I was outed and was gonna quit the fraternity,

Evan asked me to trust him and I did.

He hasn't let me down yet.

Well, what about me?

I was the first person that you came out to, remember?

Doesn't that count?

It does, but Rusty, but you're demonizing

a fraternity full of people I like....

It's hard to have a rational point-of-view

of people when they're duct-taping you to the side of a building.

What about your fraternity? You think the Kappa Taus are such good guys

because they're laid back and aren't ambitious?

When did ambition become such a terrible attribute?

I think in the eighties.

You know, maybe they're right.

Maybe you just can't have friends who are in rival houses.

All right. This is the officially the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

If your stupid houses are so important,

then why are both of you here now instead of down at Sinner's Beach?

You've gotta stop putting your houses before everything else in your life.

Before your schoolwork, before your roommate

and before each other.

Think you can do that?

We can agree that we were both wrong, right?

I'd say there was plenty of fault on both sides.

I'm sorry.

- Aw! - Sunburn.

The Three Musketeers are back!

♪ Move to the music Move to the music ♪

Take me home! Whoo!

- I'm Betsy! - Yeah, you sure are. Loud and proud.

I'm so glad that we're sisters!

We really need to get you a boyfriend so he can manage these moments.

You're so soft!

He's here. I smell him.

No, that might have been my chili dog.

Betsy, I'm gonna come right back here and be disgusted by that comment.

But right now I need to run find someone.

So here, meet my friend, Mr. Lifeguard Stand.

Oh. Hello. I liked you on Baywatch.

- Oh, chili dog. - Woo-hoo!

♪ Move to the music Move to the music, come on ♪♪

Hey, hot guy!

- Here we are. Back at the hotel. - Yep.

Hey, you think you might wanna, um...?

I don't think that's a good idea.

You've suffered head trauma.

Besides, there are ten people sleeping in my room.

I was going to say get some breakfast.

Oh.

That sounds nice. Let me go get my purse.

Ohio senator Ken Logan, known for his strong stance on family values,

has been implicated in a sweep of a high-end prostitution ring.

As the nation reacts to the scandal, we'll have all the latest...

- Case... - Go.

She needs you.

- About tonight... - It was nothing.

"Kissing a boy on the beach" was 11 on my list.

Thanks for the help.

I'm starting to feel human again.

Processed food will do that for some reason.

Mm-hm.

So I kinda feel like you've been blowing me off the past couple of days.

Not at all.

You had a lot of things you needed to...

...do this weekend.

You pushed me to be more assertive, and go after what I want.

I'm sorry things didn't work out with you and Casey...

I'm not.

Oh... Evan, I'm...

...not looking to be another notch

in the Myrtle Beach belt.

Warm body rule applies even here.

I've had plenty of warm bodies.

Million-dollar question:

Are you doing this because...

...you want to be with me

or because you want to get back at Casey?

Both.

Are you going to do this

because you want to be with me or because you want to be with Evan Chambers?

Both.

- Cap... - It doesn't matter now.

I heard about your dad.

They didn't even call me.

I found out from a reporter.

- What a night. - You can say that again.

Care to explain the flip flop?

It's proof that the Hot Ness Monster does exist.

And it gives me hope that I might see him again.

He made quite an impression.

Do you think it's possible to meet someone

and just feel that they're your soulmate?

Yes.

But I have to believe that we have many soulmates.

If not, the world has a twisted sense of humor, right?

What happened tonight?

I was on a search mission for your monster when I ran into...

You know what, no. I'm not gonna tell this story.

You've heard it a million times anyway.

But it sounds important.

What's important is I'm watching a beautiful sunrise

with my best friend.

Well, no matter what, we'll remember this moment forever.

You know what would make it even more memorable?

If we were naked.

OK. Didn't see that coming.

It's the only thing left on my spring break list.

Skinny dipping. Wanna?

- Please, please, please. - Let's do it.

Yes!

♪ We are wild and young ♪

Dude, naked chicks!

You thinking what I'm thinking?

♪ Wild and young ♪