Original subtitles

(SPLASHING)

(BEEPING)

(EXCLAIMS)

One flying car in all of New York and it has to park in my building.

Come on, guys. I put the fire out.

You're the one who started it, flame brain.

And on national television.

So?

Are you trying to make us look bad? Or is it just a coincidence?

- Johnny didn't mean any harm. - Says the man not covered in soot.

You're a regular fire hazard, torchy.

You're lucky Reed's always there to bail you out,

else we'd be in hot water.

JOHNNY: Come on, sis, what can I do to make it up to you?

- Anything, just name it. - SUZY: Grow up.

Anything within reason.

Oh, don't worry. I'll think of something.

Hey, Stretch.

You really think these tests of yours might help me

look like my old handsome self again?

Human? Yes.

Handsome? Doubtful.

Oh, hardy har har.

Getting in touch with your artistic side?

I had a thought about the infinite space between atoms late last night.

There could be entire universes in that space,

a microverse if you will.

I haven't had time...

Hmm.

- If I adjusted... - BEN: Yeah, yeah.

Well, I'm hitting the showers in this universe.

I'll be back when I'm a healthier shade of orange.

(BEEPING)

(GROANING)

(SCREAMING)

(HEART BEATING)

(LAUGHING DEMONICALLY)

(REED GRUNTS)

REED: What happened? No.

No!

I'm not Doom, I'm Reed Richards.

(ALARM CLOCK BEEPING)

(JOHNNY GRUNTS)

(YAWNING)

You clocks never learn.

You'd think Reed would make them fireproof by now.

(HUMMING)

(WATER RUNNING)

(JOHNNY SCREAMING)

Wait, back up. These guys are gonna do what?

You said you'd do anything to make up for your little display yesterday.

Well, this is anything.

It's A Day in the Life.

They'll follow you around and see what a day in the life

of the Fantastic Four is like.

We can show the world what a great, socially responsible group we are.

A little warning would have been nice.

It would have, wouldn't it?

Enjoy.

So, who wants to watch cartoons?

(REED GRUNTING)

REED: Incredible.

This energy is like nothing I've ever seen.

(GRUNTS)

(EXCLAIMS)

No gauntlet lasers, no force blasts, no rocket boots.

He's shut down all functionality to his armor.

Pathetic, Richards. All your so-called genius.

You pound against your prison walls like a child.

Doom? Is that... What have you done?

I have set my destiny in motion.

My mind-transference technology has given me access

to everything you are, to everything you love.

Your life is now mine to destroy.

No. You can't do this.

(CHUCKLES) But I am.

You took my face, so I will take all that you love and cherish.

Your home, your family, all of your crude inventions.

When I am done, you will have nothing.

My friends will never fall for this. They'll see right through you, Doom.

Then you have nothing to worry about.

Doom. Doom!

(GRUNTING)

HERBIE: Upload to Latverian Embassy complete.

(CHUCKLING)

(GRUNTING IN ANNOYANCE)

Blasted container. Hey, yo, Stretch.

What do you want?

You gonna invite your legs in, or don't they get breakfast?

(GRUNTS)

Imbecilic legs.

So, we gonna do those tests today or what?

Tests?

Yeah, the ones that are gonna make me human again.

- Of course. We need to talk about that. - So talk.

- I had to stop working on your cure. - What?

I can only imagine how horrible it must be to be trapped inside that ugly body,

to look at that monstrous face in the mirror,

but I have other more pressing matters that require my attention.

More pressing matters?

Yes. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to work.

Okay, guys, now make sure you get a good shot of this.

Over there is my new bike. Oh, and look, there's my modified V10,

and of course, the crown jewel of the collection, my '68...

SUZY: Johnny. How's the tour going?

Hey, sis. We're doing great. Right, guys?

Well, actually...

Really, really well.

So you've told them all about the Fantastic Four's work throughout the city?

Pretty much.

Fundraising?

That's next.

Scientific developments?

I'm about to get to that.

Kids' programs?

Working on it.

How we occasionally save the world?

I'm saving it for later.

I'm on it, sis. Reed's here. We got it all handled.

Look, everybody, here's Reed Richards, Mr. Fantastic himself.

Say something to the cameras, Reed.

What's it like being the smartest man in the world?

Smartest man in the world? Hardly, Storm.

Were I the smartest man in the world, I'd find a way to extinguish your flames,

as you're too irresponsible and dangerous to be flying around this city unchecked.

With heroes like you, who needs supervillains?

He hasn't had his coffee yet.

REED: 0-X-6-E-5-0. 6-2-6-F. 7-5-7-4.

2-0-H-5. 7-0-6-7.

COMPUTER: Hex-code accepted. Facemask release initiated.

Well, that's a start. Impressive.

But accessing all the armor's functions will take me too long.

This looks like adamantium lining.

(GRUNTS)

Low tech, but it gets the job done.

Oh, boy.

Doombots, Doombots, Doombots. Think, think, think.

What am I going to... Wait, I'm Doom.

Make way.

DOOMBOT: None may pass, by order of Doom.

The word of Doom is law.

I rescind the order. Let me pass.

By order of Doom, none may pass, including Doom.

You dare question Doom?

None may challenge my authority. Self-destruct.

I repeat, self-destruct now.

The word of Doom is law.

Now make way.

Yes, Master.

How do I get out of here?

DOOM: Primitive circuitry. Pathetic. My scraps are more brilliant than this.

To think that he is called the world's smartest man.

HERBIE: Identity confirmed, Richards, Reed. All power safeties are now disabled.

Excellent. Now, the final nail in...

- SUZY: Reed? - Susan.

I've been trying to find you all morning. You didn't put your communicator on.

I'm starting to think you're trying to avoid me.

DOOM: No, no. Of course not.

I'm just making a few minor adjustments.

I... I just wanted to make sure that you remembered your lecture series

this afternoon at the university. I know how easily you lose track of time.

Of course, my absent-mindedness.

As it happens, I have decided to cancel all my lectures for the foreseeable future.

You're canceling your lectures?

- I would prefer to spend my time with you. - What?

Perhaps we could...

I've got plans with Alicia tonight, remember?

I have to get ready.

(DOG BARKING)

- CABBIE: Where to, buddy? - The Baxter Building, quickly.

- Hey, you're that Iron Man guy, ain't you? - Why, yes. Yes, I am.

Yeah, well don't expect no robot discounts, pal.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(BEN PANTING)

(GRUNTING)

(SCREAMS)

JOHNNY: Don't bottle it up, Benji.

Let that machine really know how you feel.

Not in the mood right now, flame-o, for you or your traveling road show.

Where'd they go, anyway?

I sent them to get a little extra video from our loving neighbors.

Good idea, huh?

...and don't get me started about the noise or the aliens.

Did you know my water tried to attack me once?

It jumped right out of my sink and grabbed me.

Do you think that's fun?

(GRUNTING)

So, I'm getting the sense that you're mad about something.

I'm past mad. Mad was three machines ago.

It's just something Reed said.

Yeah, he's really in a mood today.

He said I was irresponsible. Me. Can you believe it?

I can believe it.

Not you, too!

Haven't I been picked on enough for one day?

No, that's not what I meant.

Well, I do believe that you're irresponsible, but that's just a coincidence.

- I think something is wrong with Reed. - What'd he do to you?

- He canceled his lecture series. - BEN: Reed canceled a lecture?

(EXCLAIMS DISBELIEVINGLY)

Yep. All of them.

(BOTH EXCLAIM)

I can't put my finger on it, but something's up.

(ALARM BLARING)

HERBIE: Intruder alert! Security code omega in progress!

All members of the Fantastic Four please report to the lobby.

Come on. We have to get to the lobby.

Voiceprint denied. Surrender immediately.

You have three seconds to comply.

3-6-H-4. 7-G-3-0. Armor systems, activate.

COMPUTER: All systems unlocked and ready.

Finally.

Sorry, HERBIE.

(BEN GRUNTS)

Ben, stop. It's me. It's Reed.

You got a lot of nerve coming here, Doom,

and you definitely picked the wrong day to mess with me.

(GROANING)

JOHNNY: Nice moves, Doom.

I'm glad I didn't take flying lessons from you.

Johnny, think. If I were Doom, why would I come here?

Why do you do any of the stuff you do?

Because you're nuts and you're about to be flame roasted.

I won't fight you. You have to believe me. I'm not Doom.

Now, this is great TV.

Susan, it's me, Reed. I'm trapped inside Doom's body.

(GRUNTS)

REED: Susan, Ben.

I had the most horrible nightmare. I...

No. It's Doom. He's Doom. No!

(BEN EXCLAIMS)

- BEN: Doom's not so happy. - Yeah, poor Doom.

So, I'm thinking we should Super Glue his armor together.

SUZY: Why would Doom do this? Why come here through the lobby?

I know Doom is arrogant, but this seems even foolish for him.

Doom thinks on a different level than we do.

Trying to understand his motives

would be like explaining particle physics to a fly.

Did you just compliment him?

I'll deal with Doom. Now get out.

Wow. Mr. Fantastic is kind of a jerk, isn't he?

No... No, he's not. This isn't right.

Suzy Q? Why would Reed take Doom down?

I am slightly impressed that you escaped, Richards, but it matters not.

Now you can witness the end of the Fantastic Four.

- You can't keep up this charade, Doom. - I don't have to.

You see, I shut down the safety protocols for the building.

So when the power core overloads,

the building and several city blocks will be incinerated.

(ALARM BLARING)

SUZY: Reed?

Susan, I discovered Doom's plan.

He's set the power core to explode, but I've stopped it.

REED: Susan, that's not me. I'm Reed Richards.

You have to believe me.

Keep him busy.

(GASPS)

Okay, but if you're wrong, I want to go on record,

this was not my idea.

You'd better take the shape of a punching bag, Stretch,

'cause it's clobbering time.

Cretins.

Come, meet your fates.

(GROANS)

(GRUNTING)

(EXCLAIMS)

Reed, is this really you?

Yes, and we have to get to my lab right now.

Okay. I trust you.

(BEN GRUNTING)

Ben. I... What do I do? It's Reed, I can't hurt him.

DOOM: Idiot monster.

Regardless of what body I wear, I am still Doom.

REED: I know I can reverse the psyche transfer, if I... If...

- What is it? - The patterns. I see it. The microverse.

I know what to do.

(GRUNTING)

Mr. Storm? The building isn't really going to blow up, is it?

No, no. You'll be fine, but you might want to call your families.

(GRUNTING)

(EXCLAIMS)

(PANTING)

- Okay, let's try that again. - This ends now.

(SCREAMS)

- You go first. - You go first.

(GROANS)

(THUDS)

(GROANING)

A futile effort, Richards.

You may have reversed the psyche transfer,

but Doom is still victorious.

The overload of the power core cannot be stopped.

I agree. Susan, now.

No!

REED: I have you to thank for saving us, Doom.

Without your rearranging of my lab,

I never would have seen the path to accessing the microverse.

I reduced the power core to microscopic size.

Way to go, Stretch. Can I clobber him now?

No need. Doom was beat before this even began.

In fact, I pity him.

I've seen you, Doom. I've seen your true face.

No one pities Doom. I will have your head, Richards.

Mark my words.

It's good to be back.

Pardon me. Mr. Fantastic,

would you care to explain why you just tried to destroy New York?

(EXCLAIMS)

Well, you're on PR duty today, ain't you?

Okay, here's the deal on that.

You see, Dr. Doom and Mr. Fantastic switched bodies.

No?

(STAMMERING) Okay. That was Reed's evil twin brother.

Still not working for you guys? Okay. How about, it was a training exercise?

MAX: Oh! Oh, sure. ALEX: A training exercise.

I so rule.

JOHNNY ON TV: Okay, guys, now make sure you get a good shot of this.

Over there is my new bike. Oh, and look, there's my...

So, how did it feel to be Dr. Doom?

Not good, and I can't shake the taste of metal in my mouth.

- But I wasn't worried. - Why?

Because I knew you would figure out that it wasn't me.

Well, I did get suspicious when evil Reed canceled all of his lectures.

REED: He did what?

Don't worry, I put them back.

(REED SIGHING)

Susan, you're the best.