Original subtitles

[Razor scraping]

[ Scraping continues]

[ Clanking 1

[ Scraping 1

[ Exhales slowly]

MAN: Mourners are arriving, sir.

PATRICK: Fine. Let's begin.

Want you...

...to kill me.

WOMAN: Hello, directory enquiries.

Yes, I'd like a number for an organization, please.

It's called the, um, the Voluntary Euthanasia Society.

I'm sorry, you'll have to speak up.

The Voluntary Euthanasia Society.

MAN: I'm sorry, Mr. Melrose, we can't help.

We're a campaign group.

- It's about changing the law. Really?

But I mean, voluntary euthanasia,

it sounds so hopeful.

WOMAN: Directory enquiries. How can I help you?

PATRICK: Yes, I'd like an international number, please.

Switzerland.

Dignitas.

And what kind of organization are they?

[ Knocking 1

- What -- What does it do? - Well, they...

I'll spell it for you.

Suicide stems from a disease,

a disease we now call depression,

and that's what we should be treating.

She can't move or speak or control herself.

Depression isn't a disease, it's an entirely reasonable response.

Quite frankly, it's cheerfulness that would take some explaining.

When people are depressed, we give them antidepressants.

She's on them.

They gave a certain enthusiasm for her loathing of life.

That's when she asked me to kill her.

Do you know, it can be a great privilege

to work with the dying.

I don't think she's gonna start working with the dying, do you?

And if you mean it's your great privilege,

ifs her quality of life I'm concerned with.

[Weakly] I -- I want "Swiss-land."

That's what we're looking into.

[ Door opens]

[Door closes]

Dr. Fenelon is here.

Do you remember, our family doctor'?

Hello, Eleanor.

So I'm going to take a look at you and ask a few questions.

Please don't tell him...

...that my mother was...

a duchess.

I won't breathe a word.

MARY: "I can hardly move.

I am bedridden and incontinent

and feel uninterrupted anguish at my own uselessness.

There is no prospect of improvement,

and I can already feel my faculties betraying me.

I do not look on death with fear, but with longing.

Please help me to escape the daily torture of my existence.

Yours sincerely."

Do you think that's fair'?

PATRICK: ls -- Is that a fair description?

Yes.

Do you want to sign?

Sign.

Thank you so much for doing all of this.

It's really not your responsibility anymore.

You're welcome.

- So. .. - An orphan at last!

It's what I always dreamed of.

After all this time, I feel complete.

I hope that's not your speech.

Ah, well, my speech...

Because it is printed in the order of service.

I know.

- I can't do that for you. - I wouldn't ask you to.

So you've written one?

I thought it'd probably be better to improvise,

speak from the heart.

- Is that a good idea? - With my heart?

There'll probably be a stampede for the exit.

Surprised to see me?

I've become rather a memorial creeper.

One's bound to at my age.

It's no use sitting at home

guffawing over the mistakes of ignorant obituarists.

Thank you.

No, one has to “celebrate the life" --

There goes the school tart.

They say he had a good war, but I know better!

[Chuckles ] Of course I'm not saying ifs not all very moving.

Thinly attended.

Are those your mothers religious friends?

What color would you call that? Aubergine?

Forgive me, Nicholas, I really must talk to...

Try not to be bitter about the money.

One or two of my friends

who've made a mess of that side of things

have ended up dying in National Health wards,

and I must say I've been very impressed

by the humanity of the mainly foreign staff.

Mind you, what else is there to do with money

but spend it when you have it and be bitter when you don't?

I suppose what I'm saying is, do be bitter about the money.

After all, what is it now,

six generations with every single descendant

essentially idle?

It must be rather thrilling for you and your children,

after such a long exemption from competition,

to get really stuck in.

Goodbye, Nicholas.

And you mustn't feel guilty about feeling pleased.

If ever there was a merciful release,

it was in the case of your poor mother.

Eleanor, it's time to go.

The flight leaves at 3:00.

D-Do nothing. Noth-

MARY: What was that?

Do -- Do nothing.

No go.

You mean you've changed your mind?

No "Swiss-land."

I'm entitled to feel a little ambiguous about this,

don't you think?

I mean, she asked me to organize this --

the doctors, the letter of consent,

manipulated me, turned her death into this passion project,

and now she changes her mind?

I think she's frightened.

She doesn't want to do it herself.

She wants someone else to do it for her.

Oh, believe me, I'm sorely tempted.

Why isn't there a bar in this place? It would make a fortune.

- C-Come -- Come and talk to her. - What's the point'?!

If she ever had anything meaningful to say to me,

ifs too late now.

[Bottles clinking]

[Train slacking]

Were you thinking about Eleanor?

Annette. We met in France, remember'?

Yes. I hope you're enjoying my family home.

Oh, we are!

Seamus sends his love.

Oh, he's in your old bedroom now.

Oh.

He really wanted to be here,

but he's still writing his book.

How are you taking all this?

I was thinking how life is just the history of things

we pay attention to.

The rest is just packaging.

Maya Angelou says the meaning of life

is the impact we have on other people.

You know, whether we make them feel good or not.

Eleanor always made people feel good.

- I might put that in my speech. - You should.

MY gift to you.

I tell you who loves Maya Angelou

is that old man over there with the stick.

Do tell him. His name's Nick.

Will do.

Hello! You must be Nick.

Patrick, of all the days to have a funeral.

It's Prince Charles' wedding!

Well, feel free to pop down with your cardboard periscope

and a plastic Union Jack if you think it'd be more entertaining.

-[ Sighs ] - All right?

Lovely venue.

Yes, I'm thinking of getting cremated here myself.

Well, no need to rush.

I was going to wait until I die.

Mm. How are you bearing up?

Weirdly elated.

I think my mother's death

is the best thing to have happened to me since,

well, my fathers death.

I'm sure ifs a little more complicated than that.

- You're the psychiatrist. Psychotherapist.

Oh, whatever.

NICHOLAS: What utter, utter nonsense,

Oh, Christ, Nicholas Pratt.

NICHOLAS: ...these words -- "Goodbye, old thing.

One of us was bound to die first and I'm delighted it was you!"

That's my spiritual practice, and you're welcome to put it

in your hilarious “spiritual tool box."

isn't he hysterical? [ Chuckles ]

What he doesn't realize is that we live in a loving universe,

and it loves you too, Nick!

My dear, I never thought I'd be so pleased to see you.

Nicholas, who are these peculiar people,

and why are they here?

Zealots, Moonies, witch doctors.

Avoid eye contact, stick close to me,

and we may live to tell the tale.

And who is he?

He wouldn't be anybody

if he wasn't my daughtefs psychoanalyst.

As it is, he's a fiend!

We can start when you're ready, sir.

-10 minutes. -10 minutes?

Well, there are people still arriving.

[Sighs]

Just in time.

We're about to kick off,

if that's the, uh, phrase I'm looking for.

It's not.

Been a long time.

Almost a year.

Is it true you've given up drinking again?

Yes, that's all over.

Congratulations. It must be hard just now.

Not at all. A crisis demands a hero.

The ambush happens when things are going well.

- Or so I'm told. - Still not given up irony, then?

Hardest addiction of all.

Forget heroin. That need to mean two things at once...

I'm having enough trouble wearing nicotine patches

and smoking at the same time.

Don't take my irony! Leave me with a little sarcasm!

Sarcasm doesn't count. That only means one thing.

Quality freak.

We'd better go inside.

Apparently the corpses are piling up.

Very exciting. Who's on the bill?

I have no idea.

- Mary's organized it. - Adorable.

More like a mother than your own mother, really.

She was, until she had her own children,

and that rather blew my cover.

Still, real or not real,

I have to burn the remains of the only mother I'll ever have.

It's good to see you again.

I wasn't sure I would.

[Siren wails]

You're not really gonna live here, are you?

I'm trying to think of it as my bachelor pad.

Ifs the kind of place people come to kill themselves.

Yes. The thought had crossed my mind.

Don't! Be serious.

Christ, ifs all so bleak.

Oh, I'm sorry,

squalor is not an aphrodisiac, not at our age.

I can't come here again.

No, I don't think you should.

[ Indistinct conversation ]

[Door closes]

[ Conversation continues]

MARY: Robert? What are you doing in there?

Hello.

Shh-shh. I didn't hear you.

Come here.

- What's going on? - Picking up a few things.

How are you?

Robert, will you take Thomas upstairs, please?

We haven't seen each other, Robert. How are you?

Are you well? How's school? Where is Thomas?

Now, please.

I'll come up and say goodbye.

Just a few bits and bobs, if that's all right, you know?

Just a...

...few family heirlooms,

brighten up the bachelor pad a bit.

Fine, take what you want.

And you can go back to your flat. Pass out there.

But I don't want the children to see you in this slate.

[ Clattering 1

Oops.

Don't worry about the lamp. I'll buy you a new bloody lamp.

-[ Groans ] - Leave it and go home!

PATRICK: Home!

How sweet of you to think of it as my home.

I am not in the happy position of having a home.

MARY: Christ, this is hell! This is like being in hell!

You! You of all people should know this is intolerable!

You know, “The service is intolerable"?

“The noise is intolerable"?

Well, this -- this is fucking intolerable!

I am not Eleanor, and I will not stand by

and watch this disgusting, pitiful spectacle

of you destroying yourself.

And I certainly won't let the boys watch it either.

It's too much.

And it's gone on for too long.

If you really are determined to drink yourself to death,

now you have a flat to go and do it in.

[Door closes]

[ Door unlocking]

[Bottles clinking]

ROBERT: Daddy?

[Grunts]

[Grunts]

[Weakly] Oh, God.

[Groaning]

WOMAN: You're undergoing delirium tremens.

Do you know what that is, Mr. Melrose?

It rings a bell.

Then you'll know what to expect.

Shaking, sweating.

Maybe some hallucinations.

We'll get you something to stabilize your heart,

stop you having seizures.

[Groans] I'm going to die.

- You are not going to die. - I don't mind.

I want to die. I want to die. I want to die.

I want to die.

♪ When I die I want you to dress me in straight-lace shoes ♪

♪ A box-back coal and a Stetson hat I

♪ Put a $20 gold piece on my watch chain I

Oh, Christ- It's the Spiritual Tool Box.

[Music fades ]

What a great choice for Eleanor.

And a fitting reminder, too, of her incredibly strong connection

with the African-American people.

All of you will have known Eleanor here today,

and if my Eleanor is not yours,

then all I can say is...

...let her in.

- Let her in. -[ Both laughing softly]

I first met Eleanor when a group of us

from the Dublin Women's Healing Drum Circle

traveled down to her wonderful house in Provence,

which many of you know well.

When we arrived,

we saw her sitting on the wall of the terrace,

hands tucked under her thighs,

looking for all the world like a lonely young child

dreaming of the future.

Soon she had flung wide her arms to welcome us,

but I never forgot

that first impression of her childlike innocence.

[Down-tempo music plays]

ELEANOR: I can never forget he's Davids son.

Does he remind you of him?

In flashes.

When he's angry or sarcastic.

Which thankfully is less often now.

Hmm.

Does he talk to you about him?

I don't think his father haunts him the way he once did.

"Haunts"

- ROBERT: Ahh! - PATRICK: I'm gonna catch you!

I'm gonna catch you!

May I show you something in private?

I get an awful lot of letters,

usually people asking for a helping hand.

And I give it if I can, but this is something different.

She stayed here as a child.

She seems deeply damaged.

Yes.

I mean, clear-- clearly she's a very unhappy woman --

the alcohol, the depression.

But, honestly, to lay this at my door.

- Do you remember her? - Of course!

The family were charming.

She was a bright and happy little girl.

David could be harsh, but the children were always safe.

He was better with children,

playful even, as long as they weren't too noisy.

[ Exhales sharply]

All I know is the family seemed very happy.

They -- They told me they'd had a lovely time.

She says your husband interfered with her.

But how could he?

I mean, it was inconceivable.

Literally inconceivable.

- No suspicions? - No.

- No signs? - None at all.

And t-that's what makes me so angry.

“I forgive you."

She forgives me for not protecting her.

But how could I? From what?

I mean, this is behavior I didn't even know existed.

- PATRICK: Here we go. - ROBERT: [Laughs]

You mustn't mention a word of this.

It will only unsettle him,

all this talk of blame and forgiveness.

I know what a tyrant his father could be,

but I did my best --

my very, very best -- to protect our son.

Are you awake?

The things you told me when we met,

about your father...

What's brought this on?

We have to talk about them again.

Well, I don't think I have anything further to add, so...

I think you should tell your mother.

-[ Inhales sharply] - I'm sorry. I know it's hard.

I know you don't want to.

- Well, why, then? Because...

She can't keep hiding.

MARY: "When I was a child

I spake as a child.

I understood as a child.

When I became a man, I put away childish things.

For now I see through a glass, darkly.

But then, face to face, now I know in part..

Christ, not this old chestnut.

Who's on next'?

- Patrick. -"..and now abideth faith,

hope, love, these three.

But the greatest of these is love."

[ Footsteps]

[Breathing heavily]

[Insects chirping]

PATRICK: Lovely spot.

ELEANOR: It is.

PATRICK: Mind if I join?

ELEANOR: Please.

PATRICK: [ Exhales slowly]

I've been trying out

different combinations of words, and none of them are right,

so perhaps if I don't think too much

and just come out with it.

When we were here...

When I was a child and we used to come here,

and for some years afterwards...

Father used...

He used to rape me.

Me too.

Me too.

[Shallow breathing]

Um, I -- I haven't prepared, um, a speech.

As you'll s-see.

Um...

A lot has been said today about my mother's innocence

and how childlike she...

[ Exhales sharply]

All I know is that when I was a child...

...when my father was...

Why didn't she...

Why -- Why couldn't -- Why couldn't she...

[Breathing heavily]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I-l can't do this.

I can't

[People murmuring]

[ Door opens]

[Door closes]

[ Cigarette lighter clicking]

I swear, if I hear one more person

telling me how innocent she was...

She might not have been, but even so...

Please, Mary, no. Don't try to make things better.

No, no, no. Stop! This is not grief or mourning.

This is rage. My heart is racing with it.

She knew! She must have known.

Surely she must have, even subconsciously.

She knew what he was like, and yet she failed to do

the one thing that she was obliged to do,

to protect her son!

Christ knows I've been a fucking useless father

and a useless husband, and I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

But if I thought someone was gonna harm our children,

I would fight.

Even I would do whatever it takes

because if you love someone, you protect them.

But my mother'?

Christ, no wonder he stuck with her!

All those children around

and a -- a son thrown into the bargain.

[Crying] He couldn't believe his fucking luck!

[Sniffles]

Years and years and years of it,

doing whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted.

Nobody should do that to anybody else.

No.

[Sniffles ] Oh!

Christ, Mary.

[Grunts]

I thought I was getting better, but I'm such a fucking mess.

[ Groans ]

[Down-tempo music plays]

WOMAN: How often would you say you have suicidal thoughts?

PATRICK: When I was younger, it was all the time.

I never questioned it.

But then when we had the boys,

it was more of a whisper --

on a quiet coastal path,

in the chemist...

...driving on the motorway.

- And now'? -[ Exhales slowly]

I look at the window

and wonder whether this floor is high enough.

Are you gonna be all right?

Let's find out.

- THOMAS: Daddy! - Thomas!

Ham

Hello, how are you? How's your other granny?

- The same. - KETTLE: Patrick!

After the disinheritance,

it would have been hypocritical of me to go to the funeral.

But the party's a different matter.

I want to support you!

Of course it helps with it being just around the corner.

Patrick, what an unusual speech. So eloquent.

And how thrilling to be introduced,

at my advanced age, to a new club.

The Onslow Club. Heh, I've never heard it mentioned.

- Is this your eldest? - Yes. Robert.

What a pity David isn't here to enjoy your sons.

He would at least have ensured

that they didn't spend the whole day in front of the television.

Heh, I vividly remember, when we had once seen some children

practically give birth to a cathode ray tube,

he said to me, "I dread to think

what all that radiation is doing to their little genitals."

Robert, why don't you run ahead and find your mother?

How's your daughter, Nicholas?

Well, I presume.

We've, uh, not spoken for years.

I can't help thinking how much your father

would have savored this occasion.

Whatever his drawbacks as a parent,

he never lost his sense of humor.

Easy not to lose what you never had.

Oh, I disagree. He saw the funny side in everything.

He only ever saw the funny side of things that didn't have one.

Cruelty and laughter have always been close neighbors.

Close without being incestuous.

Your father had a rare and precious disdain

for the opinions of most people...

Nicholas, I understand how much you must miss

my other amazing parent, but if you'll forgive me,

I have to deal with the people who have come here

to mourn my mother.

Are you all right there, Nick?

Did you get yourself in a bit of a muddle?

[Grunts] Do not call me Nick!

[ Indistinct conversations]

- Excuse me. - I can't breathe.

It feels like someone's squeezing my throat.

To see that -- To see that ghoul Nicholas Pratt,

my father's representative on Earth, touching Robert --

I can't be in the same room.

- Wine or champagne? - Oh, God!

He means no, thank you.

- Maybe later. - Very much later.

- Oh, have some water. - Christ. I know her.

It's Amitriptyline. What the fuck is she doing here?

- Who? - No. No, no, no.

I need to get some fresh air.

I'm going to go for a walk 'round the block.

[ Panting ]

[ Inhales deeply]

The thing is, I absolutely loathe my children.

They're monsters. They're complete horrors.

And of course I've played my part.

I lay in bed for 10 months.

I didn't utter a single syllable.

And when I did start, I couldn't stop

because it had all just piled up.

WOMAN: I-l woke up next morning in the guest room,

and there was excrement, human excrement,

smeared all over the hand-painted wallpaper.

It took me a while to realize that it was mine.

I think we need to be aware of the alcoholic

behind the alcohol.

You can take the brandy out of the fruitcake,

but you've still got the fruitcake.

- I don't think you can. - What?

Take the brandy out of the fruitcake.

Same as you can't take eggs out of a soufflé.

- Well, it's only a metaphor. - Only a metaphor!

- Patrick... - Bul it doesn't work.

Could we move on? Please?

[ Indistinct conversations]

Becky. Self-harming resistant depressive.

Patrick. Narcissistic schizoid suicidal alcoholic.

How many types of medication do they have you on?

Three. Two antidepressants and a tranquillizer.

- I'm on eight. - Then I suppose you win.

[Laughs]

I think a lot of my relationship problems stem from the fact

that the person I'm having a relationship with

doesn't know we're in a relationship.

[ Laughing ] Fuck, Jill!

No wonder you're here for the ninth time.

[Sobs softly]

You're going to have to apologize for that.

Why? I meant it.

That's why you have to apologize.

But I wouldn't mean it if I apologized.

Fake it to make it, man.

Fake it to make it.

Fuck!

Patrick!

I was looking for you.

- They're throwing me out. Really?

They say I'm a disruptive influence,

I don't contribute.

Of course I don't fucking contribute. I'm depressed.

Fuck, I hate this fucking place.

GORDON: Rebecca...

BECKY: I can't go back to my parents.

This is my sister's address.

She's away, so I'll be there alone.

GORDON: Miss Owen. Now, please.

Come and find me.

[ Indistinct conversations]

[Down-tempo music plays]

Well done. You came back.

Oh, I still want to leave.

I want to leave with that waitress over there.

Christ, look at her.

Do you think if I told her it was my mother's funeral

and I needed cheering up...

She might be the one to save you?

It's worth a try.

Patrick, it turns out

Fleur is an old friend of your mother's.

Yes, actually, we've met before.

Your mother saved my life.

Really?

She gave me a job

in one of the charity shops she ran.

And that is where I had one of my episodes.

We'd had a fur coat in that morning.

It was an amazing sable coat.

And I put it on, emptied the till, shut the shop,

hailed a cab, and I said, 'Take me to the Ritz!“

And I sat in the Palm Court drinking champagne cocktails.

I was talking to anyone who would listen.

And eventually the police were summoned,

and I had no one to call on but your mother,

and I promised I'd never do it again.

I mean, I did. Many, many times.

But you should be very proud of her-.

She did an enormous amount of practical good.

And she's touched hundreds of lives.

Very good of you to let me know. Thank you.

So, do you?

Do -- Do I what?

Do you feel proud of your mother?

I'm really not sure.

You're not sure?

Well, you're worse than my children.

Sorry, I really ought to circulate.

Absolute bastards!

All of you.

So, what did the lunatic have to say?

She suggested there's no easy conclusion

about what someone's life means.

You can come to a conclusion about what it means to you.

Actually, I feel inconclusive about both my parents.

Sounds exhausting.

Isn't it easier just to loathe their guts?

Yes, I tried that with my father.

No good.

Truth is, I feel everything --

contempt, pity, rage, terror.

And tenderness.

Tenderness?

At the thought of how unhappy he was, they both were.

And then of course I remember I have sons of my own,

and the loathing floods back.

Well, I hate bereavement. Plays havoc with your eyeliner.

I didn't realize my mother meant so much.

Oh, it's nothing to do with her.

It's just the way tears spring on you

at a funeral or a silly film.

Not brought on by the thing that triggers them,

just from a generalized sadness, I suppose.

Sometimes the trigger and the sadness are the same thing.

Occasionally.

Oh, Christ, I wonder what it would be like

to have an unconditioned response about something,

anything, without irony and detachment.

Just to be spontaneous, to feel something.

Well, it's no use asking me.

No.

Sorry, um, you can't actually smoke out here.

Really? I didn't know.

It's funny because it is outside.

L-It's technically still part of the club,

and, uh, there's no smoking anywhere in the club, so...

Well, I'd better put it out, then.

Uh, no, l-let me.

- I'm so sorry about that. - It's okay.

I'm used to it.

[Sighs]

Excuse me? Hello. Sorry.

Um, I just -- I wondered if I could, um...

Tea or coffee?

Actually, no, it's something else.

Um...

I just -- Would you mind, uh, if I took your number'?

[Light bulb buzzing softly]

PATRICK: Oh, Christ.

FLEUR: Hello.

- Are you leaving? - Shh.

Oh, I must say, I don't envy you.

I love it here. It gets me away from my awful children.

The little shits. I loathe them.

Do you have children yourself?

Actually, I'm sorry, I'm trying to...

Well, if I have one word of advice, it's this --

amilriptyline.

The only time I've ever been happy was on it.

But these bastards won't give me any.

The thing is, I'm trying not to take anything, so...

Don't be ridiculous. It's the most marvelous drug.

Amitriptyline!

- PATRICK: I know it's. .. -[ Laughs]

HENRY: I'd expected more people. She was very well loved.

Well, she lost touch with people when she stopped speaking.

It must have been terrible for her,

not to be able to say what she wanted to,

especially to Patrick.

That's why we must all resolve to drop our defenses

and say what we feel while we can.

Mummy!

At this point the English usually say,

'Well, this is a cheerful subject!"

I see you two are still glued to each other.

Well, no one can hope to ignore their children

as completely as you did.

Mary!

You go and find Robert, darling.

We always communicated!

Do you remember what you said to me

when you telephoned me at school to say Daddy had died?

Well, I said how awful it was.

“Cheer up," you said. "Cheer up"!

You never had any idea who I was then

and you still don't now.

How are you, dear'?

Well.

Considering I've just had my head bitten off by my daughter.

Has she had mental health problems?

Wag your pardon'?

Have you had mental health problems?

Have we met?

Well, I just have a feeling for these things.

So have you?

No, I have not had mental health problems.

Even in this degenerate age of confession and complaint,

when the vocabulary of Freudian mumbo-jumbo

is emptied onto every conversation

like vinegar onto a newspaper full of sudden chips,

some of us choose not to tuck in!

As if it weren't ludicrous enough

that every child must be gifted,

they now have to be ill as well.

Atouch of Aspergers, some autism.

Dyslexia stalks the playground! Poor little things.

If they can't confess to being abused,

they must confess to being abusive.

Well, my dear --

I call you “my dear" from what is no doubt known as

“sincerity deficit disorder“ --

no, I have never suffered

the slightest taint of mental illness

because I am the impossible man, the man who is entirely well!

Psychotherapists scatter in my presence...

You are completely oh' your rocker.

I thought as much.

...ashamed of their sham profession.

Bugger off!

FLEUR: A month in the clinic

will do you the power of good because it will reclothe you

in your rightful mind.

♪ Oh, the Father of mankind ♪

- ♪ Forgive our foolish ways I -ls everything all right'?

Oh, God. Here he is!

Like an exhibit in a courtroom drama.

A practicing witch doctor,

a man happy to turn my daughter against her own father,

inventing repulsive fantasies,

polluting human imagination

with murderous babies

and incestuous...

[ Glass shatters]

[ People gasping]

FLEUR: Well, he has got himself all worked up.

I'll call an ambulance.

Hoist with his own petard, as they say.

JULIA: Oh, God, that would really finish me off.

Is she praying?

ROBERT: That's nice of her.

Return to the mother of all things.

Return to the mother...

PATRICK: Johnny.

JULIA: Say goodbye to your father for me.

[Softly] Pat-- Pat--

Pat--

Pat» Pat--

Pat--

[Shallow breathing]

Heart attack, apparently.

You can tell by the cold nose.

I'll go with him to the hospital.

What an emotional day!

Don't worry, Nick. I won't leave your side.

I must go. I've a patient at 4:00.

- Thank you. - Well done.

For what? The public breakdown?

In the trade, ifs what we'd call a breakthrough.

Yes, well, without getting Californian...

...I'm grateful.

[Siren wails]

Are you coming back with us?

You'd be very welcome.

No, I'll see you at the weekend. Come here.

[ Smooches ]

See you at the weekend.

You could just come back and have some dinner, just us four.

Very quiet.

No, I think I'll crash out 'cause it's been a long day.

Well, if you change your mind...

Thank you.

In fact, you should change your mind.

That's what ifs for.

[ Inhales deeply]

[ Exhales slowly]

“And now I keep thinking I'm a moth."

"Very interesting," says the psychiatrist.

'What made you come here today?“

"Well," he says, "I saw the light in the window."

Very good.

Do you specialize in these jobs

because of your sunny disposition?

You say that, but last year, for four months,

I literally couldn't get out of bed.

- Couldn't see the point. - M m'

Oh, well, I'm sorry to hear that.

Believe me, Mr. Melrose,

in a month's time you'll look back and think,

'What was all the fuss about? What was I thinking?“

That's what happened to me, anyway.

Is this it, then?

Very nice.

They'll be pleased to get their dad back.

- Who? - The kids.

Good luck with it, mate.

Actually, I know this might sound a bit crazy,

for want of a better word, but could you take me back?

To the hospital?

Don't think I'm quite ready.

Fuckin' hell. You people.

MAN: Fear knocked on the door.

Courage opened the door.

And there was nobody there.

Please, carry on.

[ Grunts, exhales slowly]

Bravo.

[ Chuckles ]

[ Telephone rings]

-[ Door unlocking] - Come on, come on.

[ Ringing continues]

- Hello? - ANNETTE: Patrick?

Hello? Patrick, is that you?

- Yes. - Annette here.

I'm afraid I've rather bad news.

Nicholas didn't make it.

He stopped breathing in the ambulance.

PATRICK: [ Breathes heavily]

- Oh, Patrick, are you crying? - No, no, I'm just out of breath.

Though, of course, I'm also very sad.

- Amazing man. Completely unique. - Let's hope so.

The idea of a whole village full of Nicholas Pratts

is rather terrifying.

Patrick?

I'm sorry. Ifs only just occurred to me.

He was the -- the last one.

Last of my parents' circle.

They're all gone now.

- Oh! Now you're making me cry. - Oh, really, there's no need.

Thank you for what you said at the funeral too.

It was helpful to have another point of view.

She might not have been the perfect mother.

That must anger you.

But sometimes those who deserve the most blame

also deserve the most compassion.

Goodbye, Patrick.

[Sighs]

DAVID: Patrick?

[Down-tempo music plays]

[Breathing heavily]

DAVID: Patrick, where are you?

[ Exhales sharply]

[ French accent] Helene.

[Dialing]

[ Line rings]

MARY: Hello?

[Normal voice] Oh, hello, it's Patrick here.

Hello.

I've decided I'm bored of ghosts.

I want to see people instead.

Wee.

Okay...

Or is it too late to change my mind?

Not at all.

After all, that's what ifs for.

[ Chuckles ]

The boys will be delighted to see you.

[Down-tempo music plays]

YOUNG PATRICK: I'm going to the bathroom.

Well, don't be long.

[Breathing heavily]

DAVID: Patrick?

Patrick, where are you?

Patrick!

Come and sit here.

No.

- Beg pardon? - No.

I won't do what you say anymore.

Patrick.

Don't talk like that to your dear old dad.

It's wrong. You're wrong.

Nobody should do that to anybody else.

[Grunts]

Right.

Yeah.

[ Blur's "Tender" plays]

♪ Tender is the night I

♪ Lying by your side I

♪ Tender is the touch ♪

♪ Of someone that you love too much I

♪ Tender is the day I

I' The demons go away S'

♪ Lord, I need to find ♪

♪ Someone who can heal my mind I

♪ COMB OH, COITIG 0H, come on ♪

♪ Get through it I

♪ COMB OH, COITIG 0H, come on ♪

♪ Love's the greatest thing I

♪ COMB OH, COITIG 0H, come on ♪