All language subtitles for Believe Me 2014 WEBrip XviD AC3 MiLLENiUM

( Audience applauding )

Man:
You see, it's these factors,
ladies and gentlemen,

that lead to
a widespread shortage

of clean drinking water
in the region,

leaving thousands
upon thousands

of diseased, dying people.

Your support

may be the last
chance we have

of ending this suffering.

We are not
gonna miss it.

Not on my watch!

I remember when a dear
friend of mine, Sam atwell,

when he first approached me
about joining this mission,

and it was his
determination

that sparked my passion
to make a difference.

His actions
have saved lives,

his message--

well, it's brought people
all over the world

closer to our lord,
our savior.

He is a leader.
He is a servant.

He also just happens
to be my best friend.

It is now
my distinct pleasure

to introduce to you the man
behind this mission.

Ladies and gentlemen,
my good friend,
Mr. Sam atwell!

( Applauding, cheering )

( Snoring )

Man:
Beep, beep,

beep, beep,

beep, beep, beep

beep, beep,

beep, beep, beep.

( Groans )

Morning, Baker.

High is 97,
and your low is 75.

( Groans )

( Men laughing )

Sam, buddy, you can't
bail on me. I mean it.

Yes, I can.
No, you can't, Sam.
Uh-uh.

What did she say exactly?
Okay, she said,

"Abby and I are going to
go to worship service
this afternoon."

Don't know why
this is funny.

"Bring Sam along,
and we'll meet at church."

You know what?
You need to take Baker.
I'm not taking Baker.

No way. I need
somebody who
can party, Sam.

Somebody like me,

and you're closest...
At church?

Oh, yeah.
( Vocalizes, whistles )

Phil, I'm just sensing
the gloomy skies over you, man.

Look alive.
The floor's lava.

Next time you can
do that with a smile.

Tyler, I'm gonna leave in a sec
if you want to come with me.

I got to bail, man.
Still got to finish
these internship apps.

Why are you going
so early, anyway?

I got a meeting
before class.

Give this to Baker
if he gets up, okay?

What time...
What time does
this class end?

4:30, Pierce.

Which is
just crazy

because this church thing's
popping off at 6:00 P.M.

All right, what are
we even wearing--

hey, all right!
That's great! Good!

Okay, listen,
if you want to
be colorful,

Moses apparently had
a whole bunch of colors
on his coat,

so I got something
made out of fuchsia--

maybe a skinny black tie.
Have a bit of edge.

Phil, grab my keys
in my bag, please.

I owe you, man.
I do. Appreciate that.

As long as
everybody's happy.
I'll see you guys later.

It is not that bad.
It is that bad.

No, it's not.
Sam, I haven't slept
in three weeks.

Okay, I've got
stats homework

growing out of
my backseat.

And to top it all off,
I've got to go in front
of the I.F.C. Tonight

and deny all of
the hazing allegations
they have on you guys.

I-I-I--
I'm not like you all.

I can't just get up
in front of people
and just lie to their faces.

Okay. Who's your
stats Professor again?

You're in Elliot's
class, right?
Yeah.

And did he start off
the year talking about

how even Einstein
failed math as a kid?

Yeah.
Yeah, pretty
amazing story, right?

Only problem is,

that story
never happened.

Einstein didn't fail
math as a kid.

He mastered differential
calculus before he was 15.

Teachers still tell
their students that
today because it...

It inspires a sense
of hope that their students

can overcome obstacles
and achieve their dreams.

Sometimes people do
want to be lied to.

So you want me
to sell out?

No, I want you
to buy in.

Look, Phil,

I think you're
bad-ass, dude.
I really do.

But if you want to join
a fraternity, make sure
there's one to join.

You're gonna be all right.
You know that, don't you?

Morning, gentlemen.
Morning, sir.

Grab Phil's stats book
along with my bag, please.
Yes, sir.

Boys, Phil has fallen
deathly ill.

When you get back
to the dorms,

see that he goes straight
to sleep and isn't disturbed.

Understood?
Yes, sir.

I'll leave this
on my porch for you
when I finish it.

Have a good day, Mr. atwell.
Have a good day, Mr. atwell.

What are you doing?
I just said that.

Come on!

All righty.

Your transcript

and your application
to graduate.

Thank you.

Pretty darn
exciting.

You're cool, right?

Yeah, you're cool.

Uh, for my address,

should I put
my current address
or permanent address?

Here's what's gonna happen.
The business office is going to

to whatever you put
in the blank under "address."
What-- sorry.

I'm gonna be switching
houses is all,

because I'm going
to law school
here in the fall.

So I'm wondering
if I should...
Mm-hmm.

I was supposed to
go to law school.

It was the end
of my last semester

as a political
science major--

I'm a poli sci major.
And my therapist

convinced me to take
a semester off.

Just thought it might
help me find myself.

My therapist
and I went to

cabo San Lucas,

and they found her with...

Shut up, shut up,

shut up!

Shut it!

Are you okay?

I'll put my
permanent address.

It says here
there's

a hold on
my application

for $9,211,
but my scholarship
should cover that.

Hmm?

Would you mind just
checking on that?

Check to see
if we made a mistake?

Have a real
quick look?
Now?

Yeah.

You took summer school
last year?

Yes. Some of
my professors

were saying that
it'd be a good way
to make time

to prepare for
the lsat's, so...

Mm, that makes sense.

Yeah, I know.
That's why I shouldn't
be penalized.

No, this tuition bill.

It all seems to be
adding up correctly.

Your scholarship expired
last semester.

I'm gonna pour you
a drink.

Uh, hold on. That's not
gonna work for me.
I can't pay that.

Oh, shoot. I guess that
makes you the only student
who can't afford college.

Hold on, hold on.
I'm not gonna be
able to come up

with nine grand
in three weeks.

Then take a semester off.
I'm not taking
a semester off.

Son, stop thinking about
your dreams being crushed
as a bad thing.

It's fantastic.

This is the first day
of the rest of your
pathetic life.

Take the advice
my father gave me:

Life is difficult.

( People applauding )
Jesus.

Amen. You guys
can be seated.

We're gonna continue
to fan the flames
of the spirit,

but first off,
we're gonna hear
from Macy

about our missions team.

Hi everyone.
I want to talk
to you this evening

about our annual
summer mission trip.

After a lot of
prayer and fasting,

our group has felt
the lord's calling to
go and make disciples

in Hawaii!

Now, reaching the Hawaiians
with the gospel of Jesus

will be impossible
without the financial
support of our church.

I'd love to answer
any questions you may have

after the service,
and we just really
appreciate your support.

Thanks.

We have decided
to give tonight's offering

towards our missionaries
in their efforts.

As the ushers
come forward,
all that I ask

is that you give
in a way that reflects

the faith

that you claim.

Let's continue to
worship together.

Look alive, look alive.
Here we go.

Hey, Macy.

Hey! How are you?
Good!

Sam atwell.
I didn't know you
went to this church.

I don't. I came with
some friends, so...

Oh.
Yeah.

How's it going?
How's the fundraising going?

It's going well.
It's definitely

a challenge, though,
to raise 20,000.

Yeah, geez.
That's a lot.

So, uh, how much
have you all got
left to raise?

Well, let's see...

$4,000 as of
Wednesday, which,

you know, we started
a week ago, so...

Wait, you've
raised 16,000--

you raised $16,000 in--
where did you get
all that money?

God has been so good
to us in our mission.

Hasn't he?
My gosh!

Actually, a lot of my friends
have had success raising
money for mission trips.

My cousin Allison
is in ruhongo

for living water,
drilling Wells.

There was a flood
in Lesotho,

so I'm pretty sure
she moved there,

but, ah,
she's everywhere.

So what kind of
accountability is there?

What do you mean?
Oh, I guess...

I guess I'm just
thinking, like, how
do these people know

that you're not, like,
running off to Vegas

with the money?

Right, yeah.
Obviously,
that's ridiculous.

Um...

Well, I'm...
Bringing my camera.

I don't get it.

Okay. Okay.

What do you not get?
Guys,

we only have three months
left together before
we have to graduate.

I'm having
a quarter-life crisis here,
and you're talking to Africa?

No. No. We're not
going to Africa.

But you want to dig Wells.

Well, it's this
big thing right now.
It's about clean water.

We're not actually
gonna be digging any.
You're dipping again, huh?

Yeah, I'm trying
to quit smoking.
That a boy.

It's a healthy choice.
Guys, why do people
go to charity events?

'Cause they want
to help people.
Wrong. Because

they want to feel like
they're helping people,

and that feeling
comes with a price.

The sadder the cause,
the higher the price.

And what's sadder
than kids in Africa
without clean water.

So I've been
doing my research.

It seems that now,
saving Africa

is as popular with christians
as Jesus Christ himself.

So if we can challenge
christians to prove
their faith through giving,

they're gonna give
whatever they have to
to not feel guilty.

Basically,
we're going to--
steal.

Yeah.
You want to
steal from christians.

( Clears throat )
Yeah?

Pierce clovins.
Long-time listener,
first-time caller.

Uh, presentation looks great.
It's really cute.

The idea is awful.
It's just terrible.

But I appreciate the brewskis
and I appreciate the bro-skis.

I got things to do...
Pierce, you'd be doing me
a real solid here.

I don't think so.
You'd be
helping me out.

Sorry, buddy.
There might be money
in it for you.

Would you all just
listen to Sam? Really!

Sam, please continue.
Thank you.

Very well-
thought-out idea.
Thank you. Guys,

look, all I'm asking
you to do is help me
put on one event.

Sam, I think Pierce
was trying to say

was that there has
to be something else--
there isn't, dude!

I can't get
a tuition loan
fast enough,

I can't get
an emergency loan
big enough.

All the scholarships
are way past due.

And I'd be lucky to get
two grand for my car.

A lot of people take
a year off to pay for college.
It's no big deal.

What do you know
about paying for college?
Hey, hey.

I'm sorry
my parents love me,
decided not to be poor.

Guys, everyone that
takes a year off

either moves home
or they lose momentum.

I'm not gonna
be that guy.

I'm going
to law school.

( Sighs )
Okay.

Okay.
Okay.

You know what?
Screw it.
Yes!

I don't really get it.
Well...

But, guys, how many more
chances are we gonna get

to steal from people
under false pretenses
as a family?

That's not really...
Huh? College, no parents.

I'm in.

And I know
Tyler's in.

No, I'm not in.
Tyler?

I couldn't live with myself
if we weren't giving

most of the money
to charity.
Okay.

You know that I don't
do public speaking.
That's fine.

We can give 20%
to a real charity.

Plus, we need
someone on sound.
Perfect. Pierce.

Sam! I do not
care about charities.
Not one bit.

But I will take
a percentage
of those profits.

Yes, you will. Perfect.
But, guys, listen.

If we're gonna
do this,

we're gonna need
to go all the way.

And I mean,
we're gonna need
some serious help.

( Clears throat )

Baker, you don't
think that...

Oh, I do think that.
I was hoping
you'd say that.

You are the worst
pledge trainer ever.

Certainly
the most handsome.
Thank you kindly.

Amen.

¶ I was tangled ¶

¶ in all the wires ¶
( No audible dialogue )

¶ Tied down
and I felt the fire ¶

¶ there was nothing
for me to do ¶

¶ I was searching
but not for you ¶

( music continues )

It is. It's just
the craziest thing.
I know.

But then I thought about it,
and I realized, how could
I not get involved?

You know what I mean?
It's just a cause
so close to my heart.

Hey, could you just get,
like, two more jars
for table two?

Thanks, dude. Appreciate
all your hard work.
Hey, excuse me.

Sorry. Could you
just tell me who's
running this event?

Uh, yeah. I am.

Sorry. Hi.
I'm Sam.
Oh!

Oh, my gosh. Hi.
That's awesome.
How are you?

I actually worked
in Lesotho a few
summers ago.

No way. Wow. Wow.

What district
are you guys in?
I think it's game time.

Hello.
I wish I could
stick around.

I got to go
and do this show.
Sam!

Yikes. Yeah.
But, uh, yeah,

any questions you got,
just check your pamphlet.
Should break everything down.

No, no, no.
That's...
It's confusing.

( People applauding )

He has given us
so much,

and we think that
it's time to give
a little back.

Project
"get Wells soon"

would like to
challenge you
to give

in a way that reflects
the faith that you claim.

So, before you go
to the donation tables,

I want to ask you,

will you give today

for a better tomorrow?

Praise God.
Thank you all so much
for coming out!

We really appreciate it.

Please be careful
going home.

Good night!

I looked down,
and there were two
benjis sitting there.

No way.
So way.

I think we hit
the frickin' jackpot.

Hey, wake up,
you lucky bastard.

You are really
gonna graduate.
No, I am not.

No, no!

We got to help
these kids!

Saw that coming.

It's not enough.
It's not enough.
I couldn't agree more.

Ken Hopkins,
executive director,
cross country.

Good to meet you.
I've got to tell you,

I was out there listening,
and, boys, I was impressed.

I would like to--
( Sneezes )

Bless you.

Thank you.

I would like to take
you boys to dinner,

and I would like
to discuss

your future plans.

I have every intention
of putting you on
the national stage

to make all the money
you need for your charity.

I really want this
mission of yours

to succeed.

One dinner?

Ken:
27 cities, 27 shows.

We've been doing
cross country
for 15 years,

and we've seen
thousands of people
come to know Christ.

Last year,
the holy herald
ranked us

the second-most impactful
ministry in the country.

So why, uh...
Why us?

I absolutely love
what you guys are doing

with project
"get Wells soon,"

and I love you guys.
You're just...
Cool christians.

I am so sorry that
that took so long.

Hi, everyone.
Sit, please.

Ken:
Gentlemen, this is
Callie Edwards,

the best
tour coordinator
we ever had.

Callie ( Whispering ):
Hey, Joe's not gonna budge. He
said we could only afford one.

That's what I thought
would happen.

Fellas,
here's the deal.

We can only afford
to offer you one
signing bonus,

but it is $15,000,
and we can cover

all of your food
and lodging expenses
while you're on tour.

"On tour"?
We would be doing
what, exactly?

Well, obviously,
you would be
getting donations,

but primarily
you'll be preaching.
Oh.

Uh, well, I'm not--

you're not-- yeah.
You're not doing that.

He's actually
our tech guy.

He's actually
interning with us
this year,

aren't you, Tyler?
But he's as much a part
of the team as anybody.

Tyler, are you
from South Africa?
What's that?

Quick question, Ken,

just because you had
mentioned fundraising--

how much money
could we expect to make?

Uh, for Africa?

Um...

Safely, quarter
of a million.

Now, I know you've probably
already discussed this,
but I'm curious.

We would love to hear more
about your work in Lesotho.

Ah.

Well, uh, yeah.

Uh, I mean,

really, uh, if you're
boiling it down,

if you're really
just...

Let's really look
at the base facts.

I mean, this is...

This is really
the lord's work,

wouldn't you say?
Amen.

Amen.

And you guys,
are you all set up

to handle your own
accounting for the...
Oh!

Well, yeah.
We recently
switched to a

quarterly based
accrual system,
right.

Which is going to...
Perfect.
Good enough.

Our only requirement
is that 100% go to
the mission work.

Sounds great.
Tyler: Yeah.

But we can't
actually, um...
We can't--

yeah, we can't
make a decision

without talking
it over first.

Right? This guy...

Would you mind if we just
discussed it real quick?

Oh, certainly.
Certainly.
Take a minute?

I've got tough
decisions of my own.

¶ Jesus ¶

so Callie's
a smoke shell.
Intern, huh?

Yeah, let me
just explain.

Uh, okay, guys?
I think we can do this.

Oh, absolutely.
Oh, he's joking.

Oh, I'm sorry.
I thought I heard him say,

"quarter of
a million dollars."
You guys hear that?

What if project "get Wells soon"
was a legitimate nonprofit?

We can't do it.
Why?

You heard what the guy said:
100% percent of the proceeds...

Has to go to
the charity work.
Yeah, sure.

But I'm talking about cash.
They're gonna be keeping records
of the card swipes

and the checks,
but most of this money
is gonna be cash.

All I'm saying is,
at the end of every night,
we're adding up the total...

We just skim off the top.
No one's gonna know
the difference.

And then the rest,
we can give to
a legitimate charity.

I already know one.
It's called "living water."
This would really help them.

Real noble, Sam.
Will that bonus
top off your tuition?

I'm not even thinking
about that right now.

Okay, yeah, all right.
It would, okay?

But you guys got to
think bigger than this.

This could be great
for all of us.

Ty, I know you don't
want to be someone's
coffee bitch all summer.

Become an intern for
project "get Wells soon."

Baker, what are you
gonna do after graduation?

Huh? You want to
kill yourself at
someone's desk job,

or do you want to
get paid to come have
a wild time with us?

It's stealing.

I don't know, Sam.

Baker, trust me.
Okay.

Pierce:
Guys, I think we can do
a lot of good with this one.

Okay, why are you
so into this?

Why do you always think
I have ulterior motives?

Huh? There's a lot of good
I want to do in this world.

Okay, full disclosure:
I lost all my summer
rent money.

If I ask my dad for
any more, he's gonna
make me work for him,

and I just
can't have that.

So technically,
it is my only option,

but it is a plan
I believe in.
It's a good plan.

Great plan.
Great plan.

Great plan.

Look, dude,
if you don't trust me,
if you're not feeling it,

that's fine,
I'll stop talking about it.

All I'm asking is,

give me one good reason
why the hell not.

Hell is why not. Sam!
Tyler, you--

come on, dude.

You'd better write me
one hell of a recommendation.

( All cheering )

( Music playing,
man singing indistinctly )

( People cheering )

Hey, could one of y'all
just turn off
the sun, please?

I heard you won
big last night.

Could I see
your bag real quick.

Callie:
I know I'm throwing
a lot at you guys,

but any questions you have
should be answered
in those packets.

Oh, um...

Those are just the tour
policies you agreed to.

You're strict about
the no-alcohol policy?
Definitely.

That's good, definitely.

Okay, so this will be
your typical green room.

This one kind of sucks,
but every place is different.

This is where we'll get
your makeup and microphone
on beforehand.

Guys, this is awesome.

Sam: Dude,
it's a microwave.
Yeah, but we've, like, made it.

( Gasps )
You guys are the guys!

Hey, we're the guys.

You're Sam, Baker,
Tyler, Pierce!

Oh, I totally
friend-requested
you guys last night.

I'm kind of the eyes
and ears backstage.

Hey, you might
want to change
your privacy setting.

Okay, I got three
wireless and a headset.
Who's running graphics?

That'd be me.
Sweet. Yeah, okay.

Be careful with those
rascals in the back.
They don't get out much.

Okay. You all know how
these work, right?

It's pretty simple.
You just hold this
button right here

and it turns on,
and to turn it on,
it's the same.

You just hold it.
It's great. And make sure
you don't mess that up.

Hey, Tyler, do you
want to go up to the booth
and meet the team?

Uh...
Do it, dude.

Go up to the booth, dude.
Yeah, that'd--

awesome. It was great
meeting you guys.
Seriously.

Bye, Yale.
Have fun in the booth.

Okay.

Let's just keep going
with this.

All right.
I like this guy.

Yale must be
a decaf man.

So this is
the best part

of our already
amazing tour, yes?

Um, you know what?
You guys should meet Gabriel.

He's the worship leader,

and his whole
band's here.

It's our only song.
It's not that hard.

Every moment
is a teaching moment.

Fellas!
This must be
the God squad.

Hey, Sam.
How are ya?

Hey, Gabriel, obviously.
Friends call me Gabe.

Let's keep it at
"Gabriel" for now.

Like the archangel.
That's cute.
What's that

so, uh, yeah--

oh, Gabriel's your--
that's your real name.

You weren't kidding.
No.

This is Gabriel,
the worship leader.

Well, now,
I wouldn't call
myself that.

I mean, my life
is worship,

and, uh, I am
a bit of a leader.

I see how that label
would fit, but, no, no.

No, I'm just
an artist.

Wow.
Yeah.

But I'm also really busy,
so I got to get back to it.

By the way,
big fan of you guys.
Love your work.

I mean, stay sweet.

Hey are we still
on for 8:00?
Yeah.

Can I talk to you
for a second?

Just two seconds.
Hey, scales, scales.

G-c-d.
G-c-d is for...

I mean, do you think
he still wakes up

watching vh-1?

Because the goo-goo doll--

whoa.

( Guitar strumming,
people cheering )

¶ Jesus ¶

¶ Jesus ¶

¶ Jesus ¶

¶ Jesus ¶

all I'm saying is,
just know your talking points
before you go in there.

Dude, relax.
You're over-thinking it.

All I got to do is walk out,
say a couple verses,

teach the word
of the lord.
No, dude,

the only thing you
should be focusing on is
having an emotional response.

Yeah, don't go out there
and try to teach

what you don't understand.

It's fine.
It's covered. Seriously.

Baker, you're talking about
the problems in Lesotho.

Pierce, you are...
Gonna show 'em
how to fix 'em.

Exactly.

What do you
need from me?

Uh, nothing.

Just do your thing
in the booth.

I will take care
of the rest.

Ten bucks says we don't
make it through this show.

Twenty.
Guys, guys, okay.

Ready to have some fun?

All right. This is it.

Battle stations, everybody.
Now transitioning

from the charity portion
into the message sequence.

All hands on slides.

Plus, we're saving lives.

I mean, how neat is that?

Ladies and gentlemen,
a man who

needs no introduction,
Mr. Sam atwell.

( Music plays,
tepid applause )

Yeah!

This place is dead.

Wow!

Praise God!

Praise God!
Am I right, Atlanta?

( Smattering of applause )

My name is Sam atwell,

and welcome to
cross country.

Tonight, I, uh,

I want to talk to you

about God's plan for you.

I think the big
question is,

was Jesus really

walking on water here?

No. No.

This is obviously
a story--

a story--

a story to represent

these moments
when the fear

and-and... and, uh--

I mean, yes,

we all know that Jesus
did walk on water.

He can do that.
We know that.

But I think the question
we have to ask

is why? Why?

You don't think that God
couldn't have just
sent a row boat?

"Row boat"?
What the hell
is he talking about?

My best guess,

uh--

that is, uh--

that's--

move over.
Yeah.

Danica, switch
the lights to cyan

and bring them up
to 70% on my count.

Camera, get me some
ambient guitar.

This is
the master, right?
Yeah, yeah.

All right.
Everybody ready?

But you know what
more than that?

More than that...

I believe that God has

amazing plans
for your life.

Do you believe that?

I believe

that God wants to

change the world

through the christians
in this room.

Do you believe that?

I believe--
I believe that,

through project
"get well soon,"

we can make
the water crisis history.

But do you
believe that?

If you believe
that God

still does miracles,

I'm gonna ask you to
join us in our efforts.

Will you give today

for a better tomorrow?

And as the ushers
are coming forward,
all I ask,

all I ask is that
you just--

just give in a way
that reflects the faith
that you claim.

( No audible dialogue )

Looks like they had
over $1,000 in that bag.

I can't believe it.
Hey, you saved
our ass out there.

Congratulations
on your first show,
you guys.

Callie, you had us thinking
there was a no-alcohol policy.

Oh, yeah, this is
all non-alcoholic.

Do you guys throw
a party like this
after every show?

Yeah, pretty much.

We try to plan fun things
for the whole tour.

This should be on
all of your lanyards.

I took a closer
look at the song,

and I realized,
"this is supposed
to be about Jesus,

so what are all
those other words
doing in there?"

Ken:
Ladies and gentlemen,

congratulations on
a successful first show!

Ow!
Hey! Hey-hey!

Whoo!

Honestly, I couldn't have
asked for a better way
to kick off the tour.

I think we have
a few kinks to work out.

Gabriel, we have to see
if we can get you

to quit preaching sermons
between every song.

Hey, okay.
All right.
Take it easy.

But seriously,
you guys were very
flexible and considerate,

and I couldn't be
more proud.

If we keep this up,
we really will be

the most impactful
ministry

in the nation.

Now, as we wind down
the first

of many celebrations
to come,

I'd like to get someone
to close us in prayer.

And who better than
our very own God squad.
What-- God--

Baker, would you mind?

All right, guys.
Look, I'm sorry!

Bake, half of your prayer was
ripped from Jerry mcguire.

No! No, I was saying
the-the-the lord's prayer.

Oh, yeah, yeah.
Hey, Sam, do we have
a tax I.D. Number?

Um, yeah,
I got it right here.

All right,
and don't let me forget
to have you sign this.

Mm-hmm.
How much do you
want to report?

Uh...
Hey, guys,

I think we did
pretty good.

Yeah, we're gonna need
a bigger bag.

Bake, you brought
that extra bag, right?

Yeah.
Wait,
hold on, guys.

We aren't really gonna
carry this around like
drug dealers, are we?

Uh, Tyler, it's just
like you said--

we can't deposit the money
because technically
it doesn't exist.

Okay.
Hey, hold on,
hold on

just one second, Baker,
before you get into that.

Guys, real talk--

I would've blown it
for us tonight if it
hadn't been for Tyler.

I really would've.
And I can't
ignore the fact

that we might be a little
in over our heads,

but all we got to do
is just get through
this tour,

and if we're going to be
playing Sunday school
for the next two months,

we got a lot of
homework to do.

The goal is
to blend in,

but to do that,
we're gonna have to learn

everything we can
about these people.

How do they worship?

What are their mannerisms?

What do they like to
eat and drink?

How do they pray?

What do
christians love to wear?
What's their sense of humor?

Do they have any hobbies
other than God?

How do they socialize?
How do they interact?

We all need to read up
on some Bible stories,

maybe even memorize
a few verses.

If we can do that,
we're good.

We're gonna get together
every night

and teach each other.

Sound good?

Let's get to work.

All right. Yeah!
Yeah!

Who's ready to
worship and pray? Okay.
Worship and pray.

Starting off
with worship,
this is basically

the best way to
advertise your faith.

And from what I can tell
so far, there are four

essential
hand-raising techniques.

First one--

the gecko.

It's just hands
by the side,
palms open.

( Inhales )

Just going for God,
like this.

This one's really good
for blending in,

'cause no one can tell
if you're worshiping or not.

It's just like this.
Could go either way.

Your mom could...

Play it out,
play it out.

Your mom could--
whenever she--
stop. You're dead.

Second--

call this one
"casual five."

One hand in the pocket,
one hand up in the air.

High-fiving God.
Subtle. Simple.

The next one:
The straightjacket.

This is very, very, simple.
You're literally gonna hug

yourself.

Oh, yeah.
Yeah.

I recommend this one
when worship goes acoustic.

I don't need to hug
anybody else?
It's just me?

Last but not least,

my favorite--

the Shawshank.
Now, this one,

this is a little intense--
maybe too intense.

Do we jump up and down
while Shawshank-ing?
No.

How do you know?
Right? No. Please.

Look, again,
if the situation calls for it,
if everyone's going to town,

I recommend

just little calf raises,
balls of your feet.

You don't want to force it.
You don't want to be Shawshank
in a room full of geckos.

Got it? Okay.

Let's talk about prayer.

The idea is
to say these words

as many times as is
humanly possible
within one prayer.

Oh, and the word "just,:
This is your saving grace.

This the crutch word.
Sprinkle this in anywhere.

Other ingredients
include metaphors,
self-degradation--

very popular.

Dramatic pauses.
Pierce:
That's nice.

What is?
I saw what
he did there.

What'd he do?
And also, of course,
old English.

Got that one?
And as long
as you finish

with an "amen"
or an "ah-men,"
you're solid.

Questions?

And that's how messed up
everything is in Africa.

Let's pray.

Father God,

lord,

Jesus Christ,
God,

father,

we ask that you just

break our sinful hearts
and just...

Just...

Just help us.

Please help us
help you...

Help Africa.

Okay? Please?

Okay. Now, when we're
done highlighting,

we're gonna dip it
into the water to give it
that distressed look.

While these dry,
let's talk vernacular.

Now, the first thing
you need to know
is that christians

hate swear words
but love swearing.

If you want to swear
like a Christian,
you either

spell out the word
or make it into a letter.

"F" that.
Exactly. This'll help you sound
edgy while you're preaching.

All you have to do
is preface it with
something like,

"now, I know I might
get in trouble
for this, but..."

Sam:
So here's this guy,

and he's traveling around,
persecuting christians.

Now, I know I'm gonna get
an e-mail about this,

but he's being
kind of an a-hole.

Am I right?
He is.

But this is the thing--
and I'm gonna keep going
back to this point--

Baker:
Granola bars.
Sam: No.

Fast food.
It depends on
how much you spend.

What about pie?
Now we're talking desserts.

If the dessert is part
of the meal, it's probably
already been prayed for.

If the dessert is the meal,
best bet's to pray for it.

And then I said,
"what's a calvinist doing
in a buffet line?"

Whoa.
Allow me,
all right?

Heavenly father,
thank you for
blessing us...

Bartender, can I get

two Shirley temples,
hold the fruit?

Gabriel:
Check it out.

It's Hebrew.

What?
Hebrew.

It's an ancient language.

What does it mean?
I'm not sure.

So, uh, how long

have you
and Gabriel been...

You and Gabriel?

Um, like, a year.

Wow.
That's something.
Yeah.

Actually,
he's been talking

about starting his own
nonprofit someday,

and I think
that's great.
That's great. Yeah.

It is great.

Great.
Baker:
Who is it?

Don't worry about it.
Do you have somewhere
to be?

Uh, no.

It's nothing.
It's just a guy.

Were you just
drinking surge?

Okay.
He's trying to
quit dipping.

Stained-glass windows,
organ players,
church hymnals--

all these things
are dead.

Christians have traded
them out for smoke machines,
hipster fashions,

and fair-trade coffee.

Now, with this change comes
new revenue streams,

including,
and most importantly,
Christian apparel.

Which is why I propose
we start a clothing line,
and we're gonna call it...

"Cross dressing."

Pierce, don't give me--
I like it.

Really?
Yeah.

Thank you. Every t-shirt
that Yale kid wears has

has a Christian brand name
or positive slogan,

so if we come up with our own
name or message, we'll kill it
with merchandise.

You know what I say
about little African babies,

like ( Indistinct ),

who's born in the filth
with flies in his face,

nothing to drink
but dirty sewer water,
and I think,

not on my watch.

Yeah.

Not on my watch!

Not on my watch!

( All cheering )
Not on my watch!

All chanting:
Not on my watch!

Show me the money!

Not on my watch!

Cross dressing's all about
making a statement.

"Abstinence is bad-a!"
( Whooping )

Yeah, it's looking
at you, kid!
Right in the face!

"F Satan!"

Yeah!
Look at that, girl!

( Men chuckling )

Okay, now,
to the left.

One more time
to the right.

So what does he do?
He goes crawling around,

all around the desert,
only to fall plumb

smack-dab in the middle
of quicksand!

Ladies and gentlemen,
we can get this baby

out of the quicksand!

Sam:
Brothers,

I only ask you
one question:

God may love you,

but does he like you?

Ken:
All right. Good morning.

Hey.

( Mouths word )

Shall we?

Let's join hands.

Heavenly father,

we thank you for
this wonderful day,

and thank you for
all the blessings

that you've given us.

Father--
father God--

as we live out
this day,
what are you doing tonight?

Please remind us
of all your
unyielding love

and endless grace.

Got to come get some barbecue
with us when we're in Austin.

I'll try.
,..As we head
to Austin.

It's kind of
non-negotiable.

...that you continue to
build this ministry up,

that we would fulfill
your calling

to be the biggest
faith event
in the whole world.

Let me talk to Gabriel,
and maybe we can
meet up with you guys.

Yeah?

Amen.

All: Amen.
All right.

I'm sure most of you
know about

the recent tragedy
in Zambia,
the earthquake,

and as we pair up,

pray for the victims
of that tragedy

and that God's name
be praised throughout.

And be ready to leave
for Austin at 1:00.

Break it up.

Sam, would you like to be
prayer partners with me?

Do you want to--
dear lord,

first of all,
I want to thank you
for this day

and for all
the blessings

that you've
given us.

Father God, in all this
tour craziness,

I want to pray
for Sam.

I pray that
you stop anyone
and anything

that might distract him
from helping people

reach you.

Father, throw out
all temptation,

and please give me
the courage

to do whatever
is necessary to
hold him accountable.

Oh, and I want to echo

what Ken said earlier
about Zimbabwe.

Amen.

Sam, would you
like to pray?

Did I--
did I do something?

Good chat.

Tyler:
Oh, no, man.

Sam, you have to
stay away from her,
all right?

The last thing we need
is that guy running around
playing detective.

I got it.
Because if he figures out
about the bag--

I said I got it.

Okay, I'm almost
ready for you.

Sam, Brent's
almost ready for you.

All right, look.
We have to do something
with that bag.

Get it out of here.
Maybe we should drop it
at the house before--

no. Yeah.

Check one.

Check one, check one.
Keep going.

Sam, he's not
getting anything!
Yeah, yeah, it's fine.

Check, one, two.
I swear, I can never
get this thing.

It always sticks.
Check one.

You got something?

Uh, hi, I'm Sam atwell.

Hello.
This is Tyler.
We're good.

We're good? Good.
Are we good?

( Scoffs )
All right.
Tyler.

No, you know what?
Just stay focused, Sam.

Okay?

Hey, Sam, hey.

I need to check
the pickups
in your mic.

Yeah, it's fine,
it's fine.

That's what I thought too,
but the pickups--
let me just...

Yale, it's fine.
I said I got it.

I can handle it.
Okay?

Yale:
Yeah, you can
handle it.

( Indistinct )

Hey, you know what?
You could lighten up
a little bit.

We're putting on
a pretty amazing show.
It's not just a show anymore.

Hey. Hey, Sam.
Hey!

How are you?
Fantastic, thank you.

I just had to tell you
how truly inspired

I have been by
your last two sermons.

That's great, dude.
That's awesome. Thanks.
I appreciate it.

Hey, Sam...
Yeah?

I think God wants me
to go to Africa.

Just forget about school.
Drop everything here

and just go.

I know there are missionaries
leaving from Houston
in a few days.

I understand that money
may be a huge issue
and everything, but...

I just had to ask you,

how do you know
what it is that God
wants you to do?

Well, I mean,

if you think about it,
why wouldn't God want you
to go to Africa, you know?

I say if you feel

in your heart that
God's calling you
to do that,

just go for it, dude.

Yes, yes, yes!
Definitely.

I-- I just wish that
God would just pick up
the phone, you know,

and give me a call
and tell me what to do,

but maybe if
you wouldn't mind
praying for me.

Of course, dude. Yeah.
I'd really appreciate that.

I would really, really
really appreciate that.
I got to get back to the booth.

Okay.
Thank you, guys.
Thank you, thank you.

Hey, congratulations.

You're awesome.
Thanks.

Baker:
What's up, you d.B.?
What up?

Brought you all some
breakfast taquitos.

Hey, guys, you got to read
some of these fan letters.

"Dearest God squad,
you are my heroes,

and I'd love to
make your sidekick.
Unrighteousness?"

All: Not on my watch.
Four exclamation marks.

What the hell is that?
Ty, you got to
check these out.

What?

Why did you
do that?
What?

Oh, you d--
you didn't see how
excited that kid was?

That kid's name
is Cameron.

And you can't just push
a decision like that on
someone you don't know.

I'm not pushing anything
on anyone, okay?

I'm just-- he--

he believes that God
wants him to go to Africa.

I can't help if he's convicted.
That's not my fault.
Are you kidding me?

You keep saying you're
supporting people who believe
in God, but you're not.

All you're doing is
pushing God on people
that believe in you.

You have to chill, okay?
I'm not doing anything

except saying what
people expect me to say--
that's it.

And if people want to
give money to a good cause,
what's so bad about--

what we're taking is
worse than their money.

You just turned Cameron's
life upside down

for something you don't
even believe in.

It doesn't matter
if I believe it,
if you believe it.

It doesn't matter
if any of us believe it.
We're here to facilitate--

no, we're here because
you got backed into a corner.
That is it.

That's it, man.

It was you that
needed them,

not the other
way around.

Let me get this straight.
So you think that Cameron
shouldn't go to Africa?

You think that
christians shouldn't make

the world
a better place,
is that right?

Not if they're doing it
for bullshit reasons.
It's not bullshit to Cameron.

He believes in Jesus.
Why does that bother
you so much?

He only believes it
because people like you

stand on that stage
and sell it to him.

He doesn't know any better
than to buy it.

Hey, Tyler,
chill out, man.

Just simmer down.
Sam:
Guys, we're all tired.

We're all stressed.
We've been on the road
a long time.

Okay? Look,
what I want you to do--
I'm done.

What?

I'm done, man.

What do you mean?
I'm not doing
this anymore.

I can't do this
anymore.

And, guys, maybe
we don't have to.

Maybe we can just
leave the tour.

We all heard about
the earthquakes
in Zambia, right?

And Cameron was just
telling us about
some missionaries

that are going there
in the next few days.

We could just go to Ken
and tell him that God
called us there.

How could he
argue with that?

We made enough money,
and the time to get out
couldn't be better.

( Ringing )

What's going on
in Zambia?

( Ringing continues )
Don't worry about
Zambia, Baker.

We're not going to Zambia.
We're not going to Zambia.

'Cause there's plenty
of money to be had
right here.

For once, this is
the perfect time for you
to quit while you're ahead.

I didn't ask for your opinion.
I'm not lying to
these people anymore.

Good, then leave, get out.
You just forfeit your share
for somebody else.

Okay? Go find some
other internship.

Why don't you think about
someone other than yourself
for a second?

Quiet!
( Phone stops ringing )

No one's leaving.

We're gonna finish
what we started.

Works for me, Sam.

Okay?

Tyler? Tyler!

Sam,

I am not trying to put
you guys in a tough spot,

but tonight is
my last show, man.

And if y'all want to
keep going, then...

Well, then,
that's on you.

It's on me?

Hold on. Tyler.

Tyler!

( Phone ringing )

( Woman singing )

( No audible dialogue )

So I know this is
just the worst timing.

Oh, no, no. No.

I understand.
I do.

Well, these are the total
donations from Dallas,

and Sam will be coordinating
with our offices

for the remaining shows.

Well, fantastic.
We sure will miss you
around here.

Thank you
for everything,

and God bless you.

( Bell dings,
door opens )

Hey.
( Shouts )

I'm sorry.
What are you doing?

I'm sorry.
Thanks for that.
I really appreciate it.

What are you doing?
What's up?

Awesome job tonight.

That was...
That was...

Oh, high five. Okay.
I'm going for it. Yep.

So, Gabriel has
to meet with Ken
about something,

and I think it's gonna
be a while, but...

I would still be up for
hanging out with you guys
if you want.

Oh, yeah.

Uh, I don't know if
the guys are gonna be
able to make it anymore,

so...
That's fine.

But I'm still happy to

show you the city
if you want.

Uh...
I'd be up for it.

Yeah.
Yeah?

Yeah, sure.
Are you ready now?

The trailer park's
just down the street.
( Laughing ) Okay.

Wait, what?

Honestly, I spent
more time playing soccer

with the kids than
I ever did teaching.
Yeah?

Yeah.
Why am I not surprised?

Here, I want you
to see them.

Oh, wow.

Oh, he's a good-looking guy.
I know.

He's strapping.
( Laughs )

Hey, I know
you hear this enough,

but I have to say it:

You're really
making a difference
over there.

It's just, it matters,

that's all.

He's a cool kid.

Mm-hmm.

You really miss
Lesotho, huh?

Yeah.

How come
you came back?

I wanted people here
to know Jesus too.

You know,
I wanted them

to come to things
like this and not miss

the whole point
of it all.

I don't know.
I just...

I'm not sure

if I've really
changed anything.

Callie,

you are not
responsible

for changing
everybody.

You can't be.
Yeah.

The truth is,

some of these people
are gonna show up,

and they're gonna miss
the point of it all,
they just are.

But, you got to believe
that these events

inspire hope,
and that is better
than being hopeless.

That's something.

I guess I just
feel like

if your hope's
not in Jesus,

then....

Maybe you are hopeless.

Don't you?

( Phone ring tone )

Hey.
Hey, good morning.

Good morning.

You sound tired.

You weren't driving some
poor girl around the city
till 1:00 A.M., were you?

Hey, uh, do you want to
grab breakfast with me
or something?

( Knock on door )
I just, uh...

I just wanted to talk
to you about something.

Hold on a second.
Can you hold on?

Hey.
Hey.

You got a sec?

Hey, did Baker sleep
in here last night?

Uh, I don't know.

Where is he?

I think he went to
some party near campus,

but I'm not sure.

Where are you going?
Okay, that sounds fine.

What's that?
I said that sounds fine.

Uh, great, okay.

Why don't I
meet you downstairs
at a quarter till?

Okay.
Okay,
see you in a bit.

Hey, have you seen
my keys anywhere?

Uh, no.

What are you doing?

Uh, big Russ got
a glimpse of my
credit card statement

showing where my
allowance money went,

so he said I got
48 hours to get it
back to him,

or I'm gonna have
to work for him
to pay it off.

So I'm gonna need
my share of the cash.

Yeah, uh, I'm gonna need
to talk to you about that.
What's up?

I think we should
give the money back.

That's great.

I think we should give it
to a real charity.
Uh-huh.

I'm serious.
Look, I get that
this was my idea.

I get that. I get
that I said it didn't
matter where the money went,

because it's not about
money to these people,
and it's probably not,

but there's a whole other
group of people

that are just dying,
hold on.

And that depend
on this money
just to survive.

I can't-- we got to
do the right thing here.

Sam, that's just not
gonna work for me.

Pierce, just--
just listen for a second.
That's not happening.

Sam, you make decisions
based off what's right for you.

Okay? And that's fine.
That's what everybody does.

But you're not the authority
on what is right
and what is wrong.

You do whatever you want
with your share, okay?

Give it away.
I don't care.

Just don't all of
a sudden pretend like
you're some good guy

I'm not acting like
because you had
a conviction last night.

I'm a good guy,
I just--
anyone would agree

that this is
wrong, okay?
No shit.

No shit, Einstein.

Where was this
four months ago?

Huh? Wasn't so obvious
when you needed the money.

And now I'm in a bind,

and you just leave me
hanging to dry?

I'm not leaving you
out to dry, okay?
That's just unreal!

You talk about doing
the right thing. Why stop
at giving the money back?

Why don't you
stand there on stage,

tell those thousands
of people you lied to
who you really are.

Maybe I should!
Mm-hmm, but you won't.

'Cause you only tell the truth
when it's convenient...

To you.

So do whatever
you want with your share,

but I'm taking mine.

Thank you.

We got a problem.

He's just trying
to freak us out.
He's doing a pretty good job.

Tyler wouldn't take--
we don't know that!
Find him, okay?

All right.
Where are you going?
Just meet me at the house.

And find out
where Baker is!
All right, all right.

These guys have been
pretending to be christians

so they can scam
money off people.
What?

The prayers,
the sermons, the charity,
none of that is real!

Oh, my gosh,
you're being ridiculous!
Callie, listen.

Sam has never
drilled any Wells.

He's never even
been to Africa,

and he certainly
does not believe in God.

I found a whole bag
of donations hidden
in his closet.

How did he--

he's been playing
all of you.
Sam: Hey, Callie?

Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.

Hear it from him.
Gabriel...

Now, I know you don't
believe me, and he
will never tell you,

but you can hide
in the bathroom.
You sound crazy!

I know, I know.
I'm sorry.
( Knocking )

Hey, uh...

Hey, listen, something's
come up. Just call when
you get a sec, okay?

Sam,
are you lost?

Where's Callie?

Sam, I thought
we had an understanding.

All right, Gabriel.

Sam, did you
lose something?

What did you do?

I didn't do anything.

You're the one stealing
from the tour, Sam.

Where did you hear that?
I heard it from you.

You're gonna want Yale
to replace that microphone,

which, by the way,
I got to side with Tyler
on your argument.

Cameron would not last
a week in Africa.

I don't care what
you think you heard,

but you've stolen
what belongs to me.
I need that back.

What I found does not
belong to you.

Prove it.

I did.

You see, I knew Ken
wouldn't believe me,

so I had him count
last night's donations

before he handed them
off to you,

and suffice to say,
there were some

significant
accounting errors.

What do you want,
Gabriel?

It's not about what

I want, Sam.

It's about what's right.

Your fans deserve
the truth.
My fans?

You really think people
come to see me or see you?

They're here to worship God,
not to get your autograph.

Are you really gonna
lecture me about God?

You and your friends
are going to jail, Sam.

You are.

And you have
no one to blame
but yourself.

Let's get breakfast.

Ken, if there's anything
that I can do--
don't.

I think you're
done talking.

This is fraud

and embezzlement, Sam,
the kind of thing that will
put you away for a long time,

and I can't even
begin to tell--

excuse me.

Gabriel:
None for me, thanks.

I won't be
pressing charges, Sam.

What?

I was part of a church

where the pastor was exposed
for having an affair.

It was a good ministry,
but it slowly fell apart

once the news hit.

As long as
I'm in charge,

we are gonna stay 100 feet
from either side of a scandal,

because there is
no winner.

Ken, you're not gonna
let these guys get
away with this--

my mind is made up.
You need to think
about how this could

ruin people's faith,

not to mention
our donor list.

I can take over the charity.
I actually care
about these people.

We are not having
this conversation again.

You play the songs.
Be grateful

for what God's given you.

If people want
the God squad,

then that's what
they're gonna get.

How are we gonna go about
getting the money
to the charity?

It turns out the money
you stole is nothing short
of an answered prayer.

See, it's just enough

to cap off the funding
for cross country's
fall campus tour.

Ken, you cannot--

you are gonna sign over
all ownership and rights

for project "get Wells soon"
to cross country.

You are gonna travel
with the crew,

you are gonna preach
through the summer,

and you are going to be
very wise with your words,

because discretion,
Mr. atwell,

is the only thing keeping
you boys out of jail.

Now,

is there anyone else
who knows anything about this?

Let's keep it that way.

So we're not
going to jail?

We lost
the money, bake.

Are you kidding
me, man?

Just forget about the money.
We're lucky to have a way
out of this.

Look, I can still fix this.
Maybe we do have to
stay on tour--

Sam. Hey, Sam,

we don't have to
do anything.

Do you want to go
to prison? No.

It's over.

Baker:
I had a best friend
growing up.

We were super tight.

He went to prison.

He said he hated it.

Sam:
Look, guys,
maybe if we can just--

Taylor:
Stop. Just stop.

I'm gonna finish this tour,
and I'm gonna get back
to my life.

Me too.

I'm sorry, man.

I'm sorry.

Heard this movie
is so bad-egg.

Did anybody invite
the God squad
to the movie?

I did,
but they were saying...

You can't just invite
those guys to a movie.

They're probably busy
doing charity work right now.

Really?
Oh, yeah.

You see how tense they are?
They're sold out for the spirit

in ways you guys
would never understand.

Man:
That's my daughter in there.
Man #2: Pull yourself together.

Her brain is in a coma,
not her heart.

Man:
What am I supposed to do?
How am I supposed to forgive?

I don't even know
where to begin.

Begin with God.

Your whole life
you've been
building houses,

but you've never thought
about your own foundation.

It's too late
for me now.

It's just too hard.

It's never easy
to forgive.

We have to give up
our advantage,

like Christ did
for us.

Oh, it's a terrifying
and vulnerable thing,

but it sets us free.

You're never
gonna save grace

if you don't let
grace save you.

( Man singing )

All right, all right.

Sam:
Can you just talk
to me for a second?

Just give me five minutes?
Callie:
I won't give you two minutes.

Okay, I'm fine
with just one.
What do you want, Sam?

I just want to
explain myself
so you don't think I'm--

I think you're
a liar and a thief

because you lied and stole
from thousands of people.

Is that about right?
Is that pretty much
what happened?

I did lie about
what I believe,
and I did lie--

Sam, stop, okay?

I am forgiving you,
all right?
And that's it.

You're forgiving me?
Just like that?
Yep, just like that.

I don't accept.
Excuse me?

You're playing the Christian
card and don't mean it.

Just be honest with me!

Why do you assume that
acting like a Christian
means not being honest?

Because I know you're upset.
I know that I let
everybody down.

Yeah, Sam, that's
what happens when you
try to please everyone.

You have to lie
to keep them happy,
and then eventually

you run out of lies
and everyone hates you.

Wow. Okay. Okay.

Did you ever hear
that Einstein failed
a math class?

Yeah, that's
actually not true.
Yeah, I know,

but the point is,
teachers still tell
students that today

because it inspires
a sense of hope.

Well, those teachers
are stupid,

because there's plenty
of other stories out there

that are inspirational
and actually true.

Yeah. Yeah.

Look, Sam, if you
want to live right,

if you want to
do right by people,
just be honest.

You want me to be honest?
You want me to be honest
and go to jail.

You want me to be honest
and go to jail--

what about all the people
that are gonna walk away from
their faith because of me?

Is that what I should do?
You have no problem lying

and letting an entire
village suffer for it?

Of course I have
a problem with--

Sam, listen, listen.

I am not trying
to tell you what
to do, okay?

But if anyone's faith
is in you, they should
walk away from it.

And this isn't me
trying to make some

come-to-Jesus
moment, okay,
it's just...

It seems like you don't
even know what you believe,

and I think
until you do know,

your best answer is that
you don't have one.

I just think you should
put your hope in something
that's worthy of you.

That's all.

Callie...

I'm so sorry.

For everything.

I hope
you know that.

I hope that's true.

( Knocking at door )

You got a minute?

We're not getting
to the money.

I can get to the money.
That's not the problem.
What is?

Ken will never let me--
Ken cannot stop you.

Then somebody else will.
You don't understand.

These people put me
in this box, like the only
thing I can do is music.

And then they resent me
'cause they're jealous.

They don't resent you
because they're jealous,

they resent you because
you're kind of a dick.

No, no, look.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Look. Listen.

You need to cut
this rock-star crap,
dude, okay?

Listen, I think you're
the perfect guys to run
project "get Wells soon."

I know that your heart
is in the right place,

but, man, you got to
change your attitude.

I think we can
really help each other,
but you got to trust me.

Now, do you know
any other songs?

Mm.

Aha! Come in!
Come in, come in.

I'm just getting
my stuff ready.
Yeah. Yeah.

I about fell out of my chair
when you called and said
you had a new song.

Yeah, well, I'm just
experimenting with
a few new words.

Ah, I get it.
Artist thing.

I understand.
( Phone ringing )

One second.
Hello.

Yes, it's him.
Huh?

Oh. Uh...

Wh-- uh...

Absolutely.

And you are here
right now?

Well, yeah,
I can come
down right now.

Sounds great. Thank you
see you soon.

Gabriel, this is it!

You just tune up,
do what you need to do,

warm up, whatever.

I'm gonna run
downstairs real quick.

Apparently someone
from the holy herald
is here

talking about rankings.

All right.
I'll just do some
scales or something.

Great. Bye-bye.

( Door opens, closes )

( Crowd cheering,
organ playing )

Good evening.

I can't tell you
how happy we are to be
back here in Houston.

Tonight,

let's get rid of
every distraction

and focus on
praising Jesus.

Amen?
Crowd: Amen!

All right.
Here we go.

¶ Jesus ¶
yo!

What's up, dude?
How you doin'?

Hey, dude,
you never told me about

the party the other night.
How was it?

You don't even...
It was a disaster.

Really?
Yeah.

I drank 19 beers,

and three months ago,
that's bad-ass.

And now it was
just like,

"who's the old guy
with the drinking problem?"
( Laughing )

Still, college,
no parents.
Right?

No.

Nope.

I got to get a life.
( Tyson singing )

Yo!

Yo, yo, what's up?
What's up, you d.B.'S?

You guys just
making out, or...

Baker, we've got
a real love.

Yeah.
Something you
wouldn't understand.

Hey, uh, guys?
I just wanted to say,

I'm really, really sorry
about everything.

If I could do this
whole summer over again,
you know--

ah, you're good, Sam.

Yeah.
I mean, the idea,
from the onset,

terrible.
Thank you.

But you got to
see it to the end.

I did you get you
a hell of a recommendation.

Don't worry about that, man.
Unless you already wrote it.

'Cause, then, yeah.
Yeah, I'll take it.

I did. You will.

I just wish all y'all
could've got
something out of it.

Uh... we got
something out of it.

Check this out.

Boom, for you.
Boom, for you.

Thanks. What is it?
What is this?

Our fat stacks, yo!
Royalty checks
from cross dressing!

Baker, this is $6,500.

Guys, I'm the frigging man.
This happened.

Yeah, yeah.
You know what?

You should just
take my check.

All of y'all,
just split it up.
What?

I got to work for my dad
anyways after this

to pay back some debts,
so I already got a job.

I don't need-- although,
with all these checks,

I could pay him
back right now

one fell swoop,
which would be great

for me and him,
probably you guys too.

Tyson:
You know what, Pierce?
None of us

could thank you enough.

( All talking at once )

That's very sweet
of you. That's...

Are you serious?
All: Yeah.

You're supposed to say,
"no, we couldn't,"
and then you give me my--

forget it.
Just give me my--

are you gonna go down?
All right, you're going
down right now.

Hey, you guys,
Gabriel's...

Uh...

Gabriel's on
his last song.

Hey, Baker,

let's finish
what we started.

You got it, Pierce.

Yeah, man, I'm gonna
get to the booth.

Okay.

Hmm?

Will you give today
for a better tomorrow?

Pierce:
You know, if you make
$25,000 a year,

you're in the top 10%

of wealth in this world.

I mean, we are blessed
beyond belief,

and yet I don't think
there's anybody in this
room who cares.

That's it.

All right.

It's heavy.

Hey, what are you
gonna say?

Uh...

I don't know.

Just...
I'll just get out there

and say the first thing
that pops into my head,
I guess.

Hey, can you...
Can you deliver
something for me?

Uh, yeah.
Sure.

Thanks.

Callie?

Yeah?

You...

You know how the other night
you were talking about
how you feel like

you're on tour, and...

You haven't
changed anything?

You really shouldn't worry
about that so much.

( Exhales )

Pierce:
It is now
my distinct pleasure

to introduce
to you the man

behind this mission.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Mr. Sam atwell!

( Applause, cheering )

Thank you guys.

Thank you all
so much.

I was just reading Matthew,

and, uh,

there's this story

about a rich, young guy

who meets Jesus,

and he asks him,

"how do I get
into heaven?"

And Jesus is like,

"have you obeyed
the commandments?"

And the guy's like,
"yeah, I have."

But Jesus told him

that he had
something missing,

so he asked him
to give up everything,

sacrifice everything,

and follow him.

But the guy
couldn't do it.

And it says that

the rich, young guy

walked away sad,

because

he had too much
to lose.

This guy believed in Jesus
right up to the point

that it was gonna
cost him something,
and then he just bailed,

which makes me wonder
if he ever really,

really believed
in the first place.

Sometimes a decision
comes your way,

and it's...

It's a hard decision.

But it shows you

in that moment

what you really believe.

I, uh...

( Sighs )

¶ Morning prayer
took the girl unawares ¶

¶ she was late for class
and she knew it ¶

¶ the broadcaster had a voice
that was soothing ¶

¶ she couldn't tell
if it was a man or woman ¶

¶ and a patch of sun fell
onto her desk ¶

¶ she put her head
on her arms, on her neck ¶

¶ the lesson today was
the acts of apostles ¶

¶ the crazy hippies,
they're running scared ¶

¶ she shut her eyes
and imagined the desert ¶

¶ no cars, no mobiles,
just sun and bread ¶

¶ what would she look like
standing by the well? ¶

¶ more like a woman
and less like a girl ¶

¶ oh ¶

¶ if I could make sense
of it all ¶

¶ I wished that
I could sing ¶

¶ I'd stay in a melody ¶

¶ I would float along
in my everlasting song ¶

¶ what would I do
to believe? ¶

¶ later on she plays
"morning has broken" ¶

¶ she knows she's bad ¶

¶ she is slowing
everybody down ¶

¶ the choirmaster,
usually a bastard ¶

¶ knows her mother's sick ¶

¶ he'll be nice to her ¶

¶ she thinks that she
shouldn't be there at all ¶

¶ her worries make everything
else seem trivial ¶

¶ oh ¶

¶ if I could make sense
of it all ¶

¶ I wished that
I could sing ¶

¶ I'd stay in a melody ¶

¶ I would float along
in my everlasting song ¶

¶ what would I do
to believe? ¶