Original subtitles

♪ The Simpsons ♪

I can't remember the last movie we saw in theaters.

And on opening night!

Movies are back, baby!

Just think of all the chumps out there waiting three days

I'm Dr. Janet Grody, creator of Snüf Total-Body Deodorant.

It's for all your grossest places.

Just rub it right on your butt cleft, under pouch, stink flaps...

Ah! How could they say those words on TV?

...peat bog, smuckle, stunk-tank.

Come on. Skip ad. Skip ad.

Between-hatch, gunk chunnel, boob swamp, elbow crotch.

Elbow crotch. I have one of those.

Finally.

You're a real man. And real men have scrotum dust.

Oh, for the love of...

- Have you got butt rot? - Mm-hmm.

Does your stank stink?

Looks like it's dingleberry season.

Enough!

Let's just do it old school. DVDs were never dirty.

Oh, geez. Somebody had a crush on Kevin Kline.

Shut up. Everyone did back then.

Keagan's Pond. Oh, I used to love this show.

It's about four teenagers played by 20-year-olds

with the problems of 40-year-olds.

Oh, that show stinks. It stinks like stink flaps.

He was just poured into that puka shell necklace.

Mom. Shh. It's starting.

"Manliest shows for manly men."

Hmm. "Clincher. Ex-ranger, ex-CIA, ex-Navy Seal,

John Clinch doles out his own brand of justice with his fist."

Buddy, you had me at fist!

- Let's go. - Where?

A place where we're always safe.

Why are you so good to me?

'Cause I'm with you for the long haul.

As long as there's a pond and a ladder, I'll be there.

Found it.

Aw. I forgot about this season's unfortunate haircuts.

Whoa, this looks just like the dress Laney wore

when she got drunk on cough syrup and blew her Juilliard audition.

Mmm, I was trying to look just like her. I guess we all were.

All these old clothes are actually kind of trendy again.

You know, I bet that would fit you.

Aw.

You look just like a little me trying to look like a little Sarah Jennifer Judson.

Lisa. You're adorable.

I guess, but what if someone looks at me?

Oh. No one's gonna look at you.

How cute was Lisa in her '90s look, Maggie? Pretty fly, I thought.

It's so funny how things come back in style. Like the word fly!

And she was worried about what the other kids would think.

They'll think she's cute as a button, right?

Janey. Do you think this outfit looks okay?

Uh, we're all waiting to hear what we think from them.

Move!

Please don't be getting consoled by the janitor.

Hmm. Retro vibes but still of the moment.

It tells a story. And that story is "look at my outfit."

It works!

I can't believe it. My little girl is fashionable.

And then at lunch, when I went up to return my tray, everyone clapped. Ha!

Oh, no, I can't go back to this dress that we bought at CVS?

Please tell me you have one more cool outfit.

Oh. I can do better than that.

♪ Street sounds swirling through my mind ♪

♪ Street sounds swirling through my mind ♪

Mr. Largo died?

Or he has jury duty. It was something dumb.

Honey, I love your eye.

You're coming thrifting with us this Saturday. Let's see you in action.

Oh, that sounds fun.

Downtown. Noon. You better like boba or I swear to God...

Terri, I didn't know you were in Fashion Club. Where's Sherri?

Please. Have you ever seen Sherri slay? Or so much as serve?

Keep walking, Kmart!

Guess which fist I'm gonna punch you off your chopper with.

- Huh? - Wrong.

Hope that ambulance has medicine.

Homer, we need your help. Smitty's trapped between two...

He's running out of oxygen. Ooh.

Uh, Saturday? Mmm. I sort of have plans.

But I can totally meet you at 2:00. Mom and daughter day.

Great.

My Frank Paul donkey shirt.

I had so many great memories with it. And thanks to you, I have one more.

- Mmm. - Aw.

Okay. If I'm gonna go shopping, I'm gonna need some money.

Twenty-eight dollars.

So, thrift stores aren't for poor people anymore?

Oh, sweetheart, nothing is.

What a racket. Let's ditch this place. I have a better idea.

Hmm. Everyone's either had way too much work done or not nearly enough.

That counts as two selfies.

I'm sure she'll be here any second.

No worries. I can tell you all about my lawsuit

against the makers of the Keagan's Pond slot machine.

It's rigged against me!

My mom sent all her cool looks to the victims of some flood. So selfish.

I mean, look at how cool all the moms used to be.

I bet every mom in town has an attic full of forgotten vintage clothes.

You still wanna hang? Even after my mom totally mommed out on us?

Please. We don't ditch people just for having crazy mothers.

My mom once set fire to a piano store

because she was trying to get a news anchor's attention.

Ugh, mission accomplished.

Come on. We're gonna party at a friend's house.

Ooh, a party?

Playing Candy Land with Ralph is a party?

I'm popular.

Why are we leaving? And why did we come?

Shh. Man, what a haul.

Vintage Abercrombie flannel, GUESS overalls, spaghetti strap dress!

Okay, okay, we're thieves. I'm a thief. I'm in a gang of thieves.

And we're recycling old clothes instead of supporting fast fashion.

It's a victimless crime, which is the second best kind.

But it's still a crime

to look this good.

I mean, it is a shame to just let such cool clothes go to waste.

It's not like Mrs. Wiggum was gonna pass them down to Ralph.

Oh! Lisa, you're a genius again.

We'll only hit boy moms' houses from now on.

Oh. Stealing from more moms? I don't know.

Hey, "Fashion Girl." This is your basic mom.

Don't forget you have a dentist appointment today.

Hope you're not too trendy to sanitize your retainer.

I'm in.

But if we're gonna hit every boy-mom house in town,

we can't do it one awkward playdate at a time.

We need to get all of the moms out of the house at once. But how?

Attention, students. Don't forget Saturday is the Mother-Son Dance.

So put on your boogie shoes, and mother-respecting bow ties,

and get ready to "par-tay."

These are the houses of Springfield's former fashion hotties.

The moms are at the dance.

And I've got the dad distracter.

This dance is so lovely. Whose idea was it?

Well, Mother and I have been going through a bit of a rough patch

and our couples' counselor suggested it.

Seymour. I didn't wear my fancy orthopedics for you to chitchat.

I asked the DJ to play "Hungry Eyes."

Bart, "Hungry Eyes."

You'll never catch me alive!

♪ Hungry eyes ♪

Bart, if you don't boogie with me,

I'll lead a mom dance in the center of the gym.

Aha!

Huh?

Okay, this is the big score. The mother lode of mother clothes.

Martin Prince's mom.

I heard her sister used to manage an Aéropostale and had a 10% discount.

- Wow. - Wow.

Let's do this.

Oh, my God. These sick freaks don't have a TV.

Come on. Pick up, pick up.

Spice Girls tour jacket.

Jelly sandals. Sweatpants with words written on the butt.

Old Man Prince is on the move. Get out of there.

Guys, we gotta go. We can climb down from here.

Mom's shirt.

Attention, intruders.

We know you're in the house. Police are on their way.

- Oh, no. - Exit the premises immediately.

I know that the neighbors always have a lot of cash.

They hide a key in the flower pot.

How did I ever rationalize this as anything other than a literal crime?

I'm not a fashionista. I'm a criminal.

M-Mom?

I'll explain in the dinghy.

Where did you get a dinghy?

Do you wanna escape or not?

While I'm busy get away paddling,

why don't you tell me what were you thinking?

Take that, ya stupid pigs.

So, your mom didn't even yell at you? Wow, she's pretty cool.

Well, I am grounded for the next eight months.

♪ In a sort of teenage purgatory ♪

♪ Doo, doo-doo-doo-doo Doo, doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ Doo, doo-doo-doo-doo Doo-doo, doo-doo ♪

♪ Doo-doo-doo ♪

Shh!