Original subtitles

I really think the living room is ready for a change in color.

I mean, if it's all right with you, Ben.

Oh, I know you hate the mess, but, well, it's been years.

Oh, everything is so drab.

I was thinking of, oh, something bright.

Beige or cream.

Cream with the dark brown wood and... Maybe

a touch of orange here and there to set it off, you know?

I was looking at Berdine's.

Of course, we'll have to change the drapes, too, there.

They're so old and faded, it'll be a relief to get rid of them.

Honey, I hate to do it. I know it's expensive, but the way things are going,

we wait till next year, it'll just be more expensive.

Look, there's no way to do this without hurting you.

I'm leaving you.

I found another woman and we love each other.

I spoke to Harry Abrams and he'll handle all the divorce proceedings if that's

all right with you.

I mean, you can get your own lawyer if you want.

I want everything to be fair.

I want everything split right down the middle.

Can't we talk this out then?

It's so sudden, I don't know what to say.

Well, what can you say?

I found a buyer for the house.

Got a good price.

Had no idea real estate has gone up so much since we bought this place.

Anyway, you'll come out of this with a pretty penny.

After all, things are settled.

What's her name?

What?

Her name.

I want to know her name.

Oh, yes.

Miriam.

But, uh, what's it got to do with anything?

Nothing.

I just wanted to know her name. That's all.

Gina? Close the damn door.

Well, that's it.

Yep, that's it.

Truck just left.

I heard.

That's it, then.

Did I get you anything?

No, I'm fine.

I've got some extra time.

Would you like me to drop you?

You already did that.

Some place.

You know.

No. I'm fine. Marge is picking me up in a little while.

Marge.

That's a good friend.

Well... If you say, that's it, one more time, I'll scream.

Well, then... I guess I'll be going.

If there's anything you need,

just call.

Ben, go.

I'm fine.

Marge will be here in a little while.

Just go.

I'm fine.

tomorrow.

I love you more each day.

I'm getting sick of meatloaf every Tuesday.

It used to be your favorite.

I used to be 12 years old for Christ's sake. It's Tuesday so this must be

meatloaf.

Fuck you, your loving daughter.

You ungrateful little bastard.

I'd like to kick her ass.

That's all she took?

Just a backpack with a few clothes.

Oh.

Did she have any money?

She had her bankbook.

Two or three hundred dollars.

She'd been saving since... I don't know what to say.

She'll come back.

Kids. They get one pubic hair. They think they're all grown up. They think

own the world.

She'll come back.

No. We'll have to find her.

That note.

So cold. So final.

She really hates us.

Say it, say it. It makes me hungry to say it.

Fuck it.

Fuck me.

Oh, and fuck me.

Why don't you do it, huh?

What's the big deal anyway?

Ben, don't I excite you anymore?

Don't turn things around on me, huh?

You know, if you really loved me, I wouldn't have to ask you.

Look, everybody does it. What's the big deal?

See, it's a turn -on.

Everybody does it.

Up and down, all the way in.

Yeah, suck it. Come on, come on.

Suck it.

Harder. Suck it harder.

That's it, Tina.

Dan, we've got to talk.

Gina, I need some sleep, huh? I'm tired.

That's all we do is talk, talk, talk.

I need some rest.

We talk, but we never say anything.

All right, Gina.

What do you want to say, huh? What do you want to talk about? Your daughter?

Our daughter.

You raised her, you ungrateful son of a bitch.

Marjorie's friend is almost certain she saw her down in the East Village.

It was this girl, and she looked like her. Then it could have been Carrie.

Hippies. They're all hippies. They all look alike.

Junior, what would you like me to do, huh? Would you like me to get dressed

go look for her?

Will you please go to sleep? Just turn over and go to sleep.

I need my rest.

And will you please shut the goddamn light?

I know what you're thinking, Gina.

Things have a way of working out for the best.

I know. You think I'm full of shit.

They do.

When George started fucking around, I was crushed.

I didn't know what to do with myself. I'd played the housewife for so long.

One day, I just couldn't take it anymore.

So, I changed the locks on the door. I packed his bags and put them outside.

George came home at two o 'clock in the morning, plastered.

When he saw me looking through the bedroom window, he peed on my favorite

rosebush.

Can you imagine?

Then he bowed and left.

Now he calls me in between girlfriends when he's horny.

Well, what the hell?

I mean, he's a good fuck.

And he could always make me laugh.

I'm sorry about that. I feel responsible.

Well, don't. Ah, come on, Marge. It was my own damn fault.

I'm the one that got drunk.

You know, when Ben left me, I guess I felt like I'd lost everything.

My home, my family, my identity.

Well, maybe subconsciously I wanted to lose my self -respect, too.

You're not making too much sense.

I guess I'm not.

It's just that I'm... I'm starting to feel something.

I don't know if I can explain this.

See, all those years, my thoughts were always plural.

Never I.

Always they.

Pick this one up, drop that one off.

Now there's no one.

No one that I have to worry about but me.

Oh, I'm frightened.

I never, never wanted to be alone.

Eat alone, sleep alone, come home to an empty house.

But I've come to the realization I don't have to plan my life for

anybody but me.

Now, you can't change a lifetime of conditioning in a few weeks, but it's

It's part of why I run.

I always wanted to, but I never had the time.

Now I do.

I never had a reason.

Now I have.

I can run just because I want to.

I don't have to cater to anybody but me.

I ran to prove that I could do it.

That I wasn't getting old.

There was something left for me.

The emotion I felt when Ben left.

Oh, there was anger and hatred.

I ran and the sweat ran from my body and the anger and hatred ran with it.

In a way, I'm relieved that Ben is gone.

I don't have to worry about him anymore.

Just my own needs.

I worry about Carrie.

But I don't miss her.

I no longer think about her as my daughter.

I just hope that she's all right.

Now I run.

Run from my life.

But I can't run from my dreams.

I can control my life.

I can't control my dreams.

I sense myself walking.

Then it's as though I stepped out of myself and became another person

me.

I could see myself and the room around me.

I approach a door and it creaks open.

I'm not frightened of this.

It's as though I wanted it to open for me.

I hear water trickling in a fountain.

reaches out to touch it.

I cup my hands under it and drink.

The water is sweet and refreshing.

I hear voices, talking aimlessly, someone laughing.

I turn toward the sound.

A man whom I've never seen before stands looking at me.

Drink this.

He extends a glass of champagne to me.

It is more refreshing than fountain water.

Or drink it all.

It will enable you to talk.

My host?

No.

You are the host.

Thank you for inviting me.

Why am I speaking with your voice?

It is my wine.

My wine, my voice. It is as simple as that.

I hear other voices.

Whom else have I invited?

No one else.

No one but you and I.

Look.

Love.

This is for all children of God.

Drink of it.

Drink of it.

Eat me.

Now, still.

Now,

crunch deep inside.

Yes. Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Get away from me.

I've never done that.

Yes, you have.

That and more.

You lie.

I've never done that.

I'm a guest in your house.

It would be impossible for me to lie.

I want something in my mouth.

You're beautiful.

if God wills it.

It's not true.

Like a beautiful open flower.

No more.

Show me no more.

Why do you hide from the truth?

There is still more animal in you.

Let it out.

The only way to be free is to let it out.

Why do you run from yourself?

The truth is not in what you do, but in what you run from.

Do you enjoy eating your own cunt?

Yes, I always do.

I always do.

And perhaps you'll enjoy this.

I cannot eat that. You can.

And you will.

It's repulsive.

The more repulsive it looks, the more you will enjoy it.

Thank you.

Put it in your other hole.

In your ass.

I can't.

You're too big.

It would hurt too much.

It will hurt enough, but not too much.

It's what you want.

Do it.

This room could do with a change of color.

It's so dry.

What would you suggest?

Cream.

Beige.

Beige and brown.

With perhaps a touch of orange to set it off.

Would that make the examination more pleasant for you?

It would help.

This room is so impersonal.

But isn't that the way it should be?

Not at all.

There's so little time.

We can't enjoy every moment and what have you.

I'd feel better without this.

One always feels sick in a hospital gown, don't you agree?

Well, you certainly look more attractive without it.

It's settled.

I suppose you want me up on that thing?

If you don't mind.

Not at all.

I'm looking forward to it.

I feel so naked.

You've left me no secrets to hold on to.

It is only hair.

It will grow back.

Am I supposed to do it in the meantime?

Put your house in order.

It will give you something to think about.

Am I supposed to be turned on by all this? No.

Of course not.

I am.

When you're ready, tell me if there's anything I can do to help.

Relax.

This is what I get paid for.

78,

very good year.

78, yes. Vintage stuff.

This was aged in a garbage can.

Three and a half hours.

At least.

This is something I saw in a Charles Boyan movie.

Wait, wait, wait.

Oh, shit.

No, wine.

Or absorbing junior.

It's good.

Oh, come on. That smells good. Are we ready?

Aha!

Ta -da!

Ooh, that does look good.

Superb.

Exotic, isn't it? Yeah.

Yeah, where'd you learn to cook spaghetti?

Well, right down here. Right down here in the pits.

I learned out of need.

This is... It's not al dente. What's the opposite of al dente?

Wrong. Wrong.

That's probably the way it is. It's the only grounds for divorce in Italy.

Is this enough for you?

Oh, yeah, that's fine. Plenty.

Thank you.

Oh, hey.

It's the first time we're breaking bread together.

Oh, a very sacred moment.

Yes.

Thank you.

This isn't going to work.

Come on down here. Join the lower classes.

I like the air here.

Funky but free.

It's a mineral. It's natural when I have a parrot.

Come on, I'll beat you to the middle.

Okay, you're on.

Watch it, number one.

We made each other happy, but at the end, it was nothing but grief.

I didn't want to see it end at the time, but I guess it's the best thing that

ever happened to me. Huh?

And you.

And you know what? Hey, you got something really outrageous to wear.

to put on.

I was wearing it.

No, no. Something frantic. I mean, really frantic.

What for?

I want to show you off. I want to take you out and show you off to the world.

Sit tight. I got you covered.

Trust me. Trust me.

Thank you.

Thank you very much, sir.

Thank you.

Oh, that's good.

Can you get a cigarette?

Of course I can.

Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Is it really you?

Gina, you look wonderful.

What a surprise to run into you like this.

Yes, isn't it, though?

What have you been doing with yourself?

You know, I almost didn't recognize you. I mean, you look, you look so well.

Actually, I was afraid to come over and speak to you. Benjamin.

Am I supposed to stand around here all day and wait for you to bring me that

simple drink?

Honestly, Benjamin, sometimes you behave so childishly.

I'm sorry, Miriam. Really, really I am. It's just that I bumped into an old

friend.

Gina, maybe sometime we'll run into each other.

I don't think so.

so inconsiderate. Why do you have to stop and talk to every woman in the

You look like the canary that ate the cat.

What are you so happy about anyway?

Nothing.

Everything. Marge used to say that things had a way of turning out for the

Well, you know something?

She was right.

Where is the female Dr. Pangloss at the moment?

She's over in the corner getting stoned on martinis.

Listen, I have a much better idea than that. Why don't you and I go under the

stairs and play doctor?

Later.

I'm having a good time.

You busy?

I want a rain check.

You got it.

And he's just wild about, and we're wild about, he's just mad about.