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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,503 --> 00:00:07,060 He's doing the rounds. 2 00:00:07,095 --> 00:00:10,080 He saw the Chekov on Tuesday. He was at the Dream last night. 3 00:00:10,115 --> 00:00:11,998 - No! - Yeah. There he was. 4 00:00:12,033 --> 00:00:16,411 Third raw from the back. Head burried in his hands like he lost a brother in the war. 5 00:00:16,446 --> 00:00:19,448 Crikey. He wouldn't recast, would he? 6 00:00:19,483 --> 00:00:21,052 Not the Dream, no. 7 00:00:21,091 --> 00:00:23,673 But God knows what he'll do with Oliver's Hamlet. 8 00:00:24,295 --> 00:00:26,557 Play the lead himself. 9 00:00:26,592 --> 00:00:28,493 - You think? - Oh, why not? 10 00:00:28,565 --> 00:00:31,510 It was the play that drow him mad. 11 00:00:31,545 --> 00:00:34,455 - No, really. - Seven years ago. 12 00:00:35,115 --> 00:00:37,308 I saw it all with me own eyes. 13 00:00:37,343 --> 00:00:41,541 Halfway through the gravedigger scene he suddenly went all quiet and pale. 14 00:00:41,576 --> 00:00:43,564 - He went off? - Off his nut. 15 00:00:43,670 --> 00:00:45,495 - Then he leaped. - Leaped? 16 00:00:45,530 --> 00:00:49,202 Into the grave, Ducky. Into Ophelia's bloody grave. 17 00:00:49,380 --> 00:00:52,582 Leaving Horatio and Laertes staring down into the hole 18 00:00:52,617 --> 00:00:54,476 as if they just made a wish. 19 00:00:54,511 --> 00:00:56,336 - Crikey. - Crikey indeed. 20 00:00:56,582 --> 00:01:00,893 Then he went screaming out into the night, mad as a hatter. 21 00:01:00,928 --> 00:01:03,764 Well, he's been to hospital. Had treatments. 22 00:01:03,799 --> 00:01:06,600 - Maybe he's better. - Or maybe he's worse. 23 00:01:06,635 --> 00:01:08,944 Hey up. Here she comes. 24 00:01:11,246 --> 00:01:12,599 Carlsberg. 25 00:01:13,955 --> 00:01:15,533 Two Carlsberg. 26 00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:17,219 Crikey. 27 00:01:17,362 --> 00:01:18,637 Bloody hell. 28 00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:21,699 Cheer up, Hamlet 29 00:01:21,952 --> 00:01:23,474 Chin up, Hamlet 30 00:01:23,650 --> 00:01:26,427 Buck up, you melancholy Dane 31 00:01:26,519 --> 00:01:30,071 So your uncle is a cad who murdered Dad and married Mum 32 00:01:30,106 --> 00:01:33,624 That's really no excuse to be as glum as you've become 33 00:01:33,751 --> 00:01:37,246 So wise up, Hamlet Rise up, Hamlet 34 00:01:37,382 --> 00:01:40,148 Buck up and sing the new refrain 35 00:01:40,183 --> 00:01:43,834 Your incessant monologizing fills the castle with ennui 36 00:01:44,083 --> 00:01:47,460 Your antic disposition is embarrassing to see 37 00:01:47,512 --> 00:01:50,788 And by the way, you sulky brat, the answer is To Be 38 00:01:50,935 --> 00:01:53,603 You're driving poor Ophelia insane 39 00:01:54,096 --> 00:01:56,268 So shut up, you rogue and peasant 40 00:01:56,303 --> 00:01:58,938 Grow up, it's most unpleasant 41 00:01:58,973 --> 00:02:01,574 Cheer up, you melancholy Dane 42 00:02:02,284 --> 00:02:05,284 Slings & Arrows 1x03 Madness in Great Ones 43 00:02:17,755 --> 00:02:18,945 - Hi. - Hi. 44 00:02:19,678 --> 00:02:21,269 Is that Oliver? 45 00:02:21,994 --> 00:02:23,836 His skull, yeah. 46 00:02:24,819 --> 00:02:26,134 How did you... 47 00:02:26,169 --> 00:02:27,450 Taxidermist. 48 00:02:28,099 --> 00:02:29,920 Very eager to do the job. 49 00:02:30,304 --> 00:02:33,736 I imagine this kind of work must be the secret dream of every taxidermist. 50 00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:36,832 Okay. Couple of things. 51 00:02:36,867 --> 00:02:40,220 First, put that away. In a drawer or something, please, now. 52 00:02:41,363 --> 00:02:45,559 Second, Richard's not here yet, so we've pushed the meeting back to 9.15. 53 00:02:46,283 --> 00:02:48,493 Is it heavy? 54 00:02:48,528 --> 00:02:51,054 - You wanna hold it? - No, thank you. 55 00:02:51,089 --> 00:02:53,581 Oh, come on. He would've wanted you to. 56 00:03:05,324 --> 00:03:06,794 It's not heavy at all. 57 00:03:06,829 --> 00:03:08,665 It's lighter without the ego. 58 00:03:09,212 --> 00:03:10,397 Strange, isn't it? 59 00:03:10,432 --> 00:03:12,710 You can see that it's him. Look at his teeth. 60 00:03:12,920 --> 00:03:15,039 Every moller has a filling, you see that? 61 00:03:15,753 --> 00:03:18,917 It's because of those horrible things he ate all the time. 62 00:03:18,952 --> 00:03:21,184 Those mints. After Eight mints? 63 00:03:21,219 --> 00:03:24,294 He ate boxes of those thing. He was a child, really. 64 00:03:25,350 --> 00:03:26,923 Oliver. 65 00:03:30,620 --> 00:03:32,897 Can I get a coffee? Black. 66 00:03:34,702 --> 00:03:37,047 - Cream and sugar? - Yeah. Black. 67 00:03:59,983 --> 00:04:04,368 - Hello. - Richard. Did you forget about the artistic committee meeting? 68 00:04:04,681 --> 00:04:07,652 I can't come in. I'm too depressed. 69 00:04:08,677 --> 00:04:11,410 Everybody's gathered for the meeting. 70 00:04:11,445 --> 00:04:14,144 I can't come in. I can't come in. 71 00:04:14,179 --> 00:04:15,930 Well, can you just phone in? 72 00:04:15,998 --> 00:04:18,798 It won't take long, I promise. Just phone in and say 73 00:04:18,833 --> 00:04:22,640 that you have a stomach virus. That's what I do when I'm depressed. 74 00:04:22,675 --> 00:04:23,844 Please? 75 00:04:25,546 --> 00:04:28,037 - Oh, God, alright, fine. - Thanks, Richard. 76 00:04:28,072 --> 00:04:30,112 Call the boardroom in five minutes. 77 00:04:38,391 --> 00:04:40,536 Final Landing's playing at the Roxie. 78 00:04:40,571 --> 00:04:42,415 Jack Crew's in that. 79 00:04:42,757 --> 00:04:44,370 I don't wanna see a movie. 80 00:04:44,861 --> 00:04:47,958 Oh, come on. It's not every day they cancel rehearsals. 81 00:04:47,993 --> 00:04:49,423 I have an idea. 82 00:04:49,889 --> 00:04:51,630 Let's have an adventure. 83 00:04:51,665 --> 00:04:54,685 Adventure in New Burbage? Not possible. 84 00:04:54,957 --> 00:04:57,628 We could smoke some of this. 85 00:05:00,481 --> 00:05:02,329 - I don't smoke pot. - Neither do I. 86 00:05:02,364 --> 00:05:04,183 I got it off my stoner brother. 87 00:05:04,218 --> 00:05:07,091 I thought if I smoked the joint, it would help me with Ophelia's madness. 88 00:05:07,126 --> 00:05:10,490 You know, give me some sense memory to work with. 89 00:05:13,766 --> 00:05:16,302 - Seriously? - What? 90 00:05:16,337 --> 00:05:19,150 Well, being stoned isn't the same as being insane. 91 00:05:19,185 --> 00:05:21,963 It looks similar. Stoners look like they're insane. 92 00:05:21,998 --> 00:05:23,335 - No, they don't. - Yes, they do. 93 00:05:23,370 --> 00:05:24,673 - No, they don't. - Yes, they do! 94 00:05:25,218 --> 00:05:29,396 - No, they don't. - Oh, come on! Just get stoned with me. 95 00:05:29,431 --> 00:05:31,761 I don't want to go see a movie. 96 00:05:33,568 --> 00:05:35,119 Hello, everybody. 97 00:05:35,154 --> 00:05:37,138 Please, excuse me for not being there in person. 98 00:05:37,173 --> 00:05:38,603 I have a virus. 99 00:05:38,638 --> 00:05:40,859 He can't stop going to the toilet. 100 00:05:41,443 --> 00:05:42,864 Thank you, Anna. 101 00:05:43,246 --> 00:05:47,025 First off, it gives me great pleasure to introduce to you 102 00:05:47,060 --> 00:05:51,024 Geoffrey Tennant, the festival's new interim artistic director. 103 00:05:53,158 --> 00:05:55,755 On behalf of the board of directors I just wanna say 104 00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:58,353 how thrilled and delighted we are to have you here. 105 00:05:58,388 --> 00:05:59,755 Welcome, Geoffrey. 106 00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:01,899 Thanks. 107 00:06:02,415 --> 00:06:04,907 I don't know what my duties will be exactly. 108 00:06:04,942 --> 00:06:07,274 Well, that's what we're here to discuss this morning. 109 00:06:08,248 --> 00:06:10,909 First of all you could take over the direction of Oliver's Hamlet. 110 00:06:10,944 --> 00:06:15,226 I'm sure we'd all be thrilled if you brought your experience and your expertise to... 111 00:06:15,261 --> 00:06:16,243 No. 112 00:06:18,124 --> 00:06:20,297 - Sorry? - I can't do that. 113 00:06:20,332 --> 00:06:23,639 I'm not mentally equipped for the task at this time. 114 00:06:24,547 --> 00:06:26,861 Not mentally equipped? Is that what you said? 115 00:06:26,896 --> 00:06:27,946 Yes. 116 00:06:28,849 --> 00:06:30,419 Well, that's a problem. 117 00:06:30,845 --> 00:06:32,663 Is there anyone else? 118 00:06:36,192 --> 00:06:40,286 Hamlet is our flagship production. It would be nice if it had a director. 119 00:06:40,321 --> 00:06:44,210 Sorry, Richard. But I'm tied up with the Chekov's series. 120 00:06:44,245 --> 00:06:46,910 It's not a play you can just direct. 121 00:06:46,945 --> 00:06:50,854 I just don't feel comfortable waltzing in on top of somebody else's production. 122 00:06:50,889 --> 00:06:53,788 Well, do we know of anyone of sufficient stature 123 00:06:53,823 --> 00:06:56,379 who could step in and direct our Hamlet? 124 00:06:58,443 --> 00:07:01,709 Well, I think Darren Nichols is available. 125 00:07:03,959 --> 00:07:05,438 What's that, Geoffrey? 126 00:07:06,127 --> 00:07:08,199 Darren Nichols is an idiot. 127 00:07:08,316 --> 00:07:12,111 He directed our Titus in '97. I believe it sold quite well. 128 00:07:12,161 --> 00:07:15,208 - That was the one with the horse on the stage? - Yes. 129 00:07:15,485 --> 00:07:17,139 It was shit. 130 00:07:18,001 --> 00:07:22,624 Richard, I could call Darren Nichols and just check his availability. 131 00:07:22,732 --> 00:07:24,425 Yeah, why don't you do that, Anna? 132 00:07:25,043 --> 00:07:28,600 Geoffrey, I don't know quite what to do with you. 133 00:07:29,076 --> 00:07:31,007 I don't want to be any trouble. 134 00:07:31,435 --> 00:07:34,420 Anna, what else did Oliver had on his plate? 135 00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:37,406 Well, there's the corporate workshop program. 136 00:07:37,706 --> 00:07:39,574 It sounds intriguing, what is that? 137 00:07:39,609 --> 00:07:42,437 We teach people to develop leadership skills 138 00:07:42,472 --> 00:07:45,230 by analyzing key characters in Shakespeare. 139 00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:49,303 You could look at Claudiuses crisis management techniques, for instance. 140 00:07:50,307 --> 00:07:53,040 That's ridiculous. I'll do that. 141 00:07:53,075 --> 00:07:54,865 Okay. Well, great. 142 00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:56,833 Why don't you arrange that, Anna? 143 00:07:56,907 --> 00:07:59,366 Okay, everybody. Listen, you are going to have to excuse me. 144 00:07:59,401 --> 00:08:02,004 I'm sorry, but the cramps have returned. 145 00:08:06,751 --> 00:08:08,322 I have to go back. I have to go back. 146 00:08:08,484 --> 00:08:10,735 - I can't... I can't... - Oh, relax. 147 00:08:10,770 --> 00:08:12,594 Enjoy the trip. 148 00:08:14,777 --> 00:08:16,281 Oh, my god. 149 00:08:16,910 --> 00:08:18,333 - What? - Your eyes... 150 00:08:19,017 --> 00:08:21,726 - What? - They're like bigger. Is that possible? 151 00:08:21,731 --> 00:08:24,299 - What are you talking about? - They're huge! 152 00:08:24,617 --> 00:08:27,587 - You mean they're swollen? - In proportion to rest of your face. 153 00:08:27,622 --> 00:08:30,365 - Shut up. - Maybe they were always that way. 154 00:08:30,759 --> 00:08:32,914 You look like a Hallmark baby! 155 00:08:34,589 --> 00:08:37,489 - Where are you going? - I gotta look in my eyes. 156 00:08:37,524 --> 00:08:38,842 No, no, no! You can't leave me! 157 00:08:38,877 --> 00:08:42,409 - You can't leave me! - You freaked me out. Now I'm gonna look in my eyes! 158 00:09:18,377 --> 00:09:20,837 - Hey, Jack. - Hey. 159 00:09:21,102 --> 00:09:24,322 - What's up, Jack? - I'm looking for accent tapes. 160 00:09:24,980 --> 00:09:28,154 You'd think in the theatre they'll have accent tapes, but no way. 161 00:09:28,175 --> 00:09:32,392 - Accent tapes? - Yeah. English, you know. For the play. 162 00:09:32,498 --> 00:09:34,141 - For Hamlet. - Yeah. 163 00:09:35,230 --> 00:09:37,453 You know, Hamlet is set in Denmark, 164 00:09:37,488 --> 00:09:40,482 so maybe you should look for Danish accent tapes. 165 00:09:40,981 --> 00:09:41,994 Man. 166 00:09:42,558 --> 00:09:45,118 If they don't have English, they'll never gonna have Danish. 167 00:09:51,290 --> 00:09:53,359 - Are you high? - What? 168 00:09:53,394 --> 00:09:56,134 - Your eyes are huge. - Oh, my god. 169 00:09:56,169 --> 00:09:58,874 - Oh, my god, are they? - Relax. 170 00:09:59,077 --> 00:10:02,316 Shit! I don't normally do drugs! I don't! 171 00:10:02,328 --> 00:10:04,967 Fuck. Oh, my god. Do I look like a Hallmark baby? 172 00:10:05,002 --> 00:10:07,383 No, it's okay. Don't freak out. 173 00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:09,509 Let's get you away from these people. 174 00:10:10,060 --> 00:10:12,270 - What are you on? - Pot. 175 00:10:12,305 --> 00:10:14,128 - No way, so am I! - Really? 176 00:10:14,163 --> 00:10:15,951 Yeah. Let's go to the park. 177 00:10:19,896 --> 00:10:22,002 Life is full of dissapointments. 178 00:10:22,037 --> 00:10:25,319 What separates the man from the boy is how he deals with adversity. 179 00:10:25,824 --> 00:10:27,608 Are you a man or a boy? 180 00:10:27,643 --> 00:10:29,994 - I don't know. - Get out of bed, Richard! 181 00:10:30,029 --> 00:10:32,982 - No! - Well, you'd better, because I'm sending a car for you. 182 00:10:33,017 --> 00:10:35,736 So you'd better be packed and washed by four PM. 183 00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:39,597 Wanna know why? I'm bringing you to Toronto. 184 00:10:39,679 --> 00:10:42,087 You need to spend couple of days in real city. 185 00:10:42,122 --> 00:10:44,495 Traffic, tall buildings and homeless people. 186 00:10:45,001 --> 00:10:48,699 We're gonna go shopping, we're gonna have fabulous meal. 187 00:10:48,738 --> 00:10:50,899 We're going to a show and talk about your future. 188 00:10:51,092 --> 00:10:54,843 So you'd better be ready by four PM, because if you're not, 189 00:10:54,878 --> 00:10:57,942 I instructed my man to wash and dress you himself. 190 00:11:18,179 --> 00:11:19,193 Anna. 191 00:11:19,570 --> 00:11:21,547 Do you know where may I find Richard? 192 00:11:21,582 --> 00:11:22,975 He won't be coming in today. 193 00:11:24,111 --> 00:11:26,535 - He's upset. - He's a bit upset. 194 00:11:26,570 --> 00:11:29,011 Well, I'll call him at home. 195 00:11:29,534 --> 00:11:32,318 If you're looking for Richard, he won't be in today. 196 00:11:32,948 --> 00:11:35,259 Dammit! Coward. 197 00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:37,556 - How could you let this happen? - Ellen. 198 00:11:37,591 --> 00:11:40,489 I'm sorry, May. He's insine. 199 00:11:40,690 --> 00:11:44,302 - And he hates this place. - Geoffrey is a very passionate man. 200 00:11:44,337 --> 00:11:47,006 He's not equipped to be artistic director. 201 00:11:47,041 --> 00:11:49,670 Not mentally equipped. 202 00:11:49,684 --> 00:11:54,521 It has been seven years, Ellen. Perhaps he's reequipped himself. 203 00:11:54,845 --> 00:11:56,894 God knows what Oliver would say if he knew. 204 00:11:59,351 --> 00:12:01,055 God only knows. 205 00:12:03,377 --> 00:12:05,855 She's right, you know. I'm not mentally equipped. 206 00:12:05,991 --> 00:12:09,715 If you ask me, we could use a little madness around here. 207 00:12:10,417 --> 00:12:12,354 What's on the agenda today? 208 00:12:12,389 --> 00:12:14,444 Nothing. Avoiding people. 209 00:12:14,479 --> 00:12:16,465 Good. Ease into the job. 210 00:12:16,500 --> 00:12:19,027 Take some time to reacquaint yourself. 211 00:12:19,062 --> 00:12:22,193 - Revisit the old hounds. - The old hounds. 212 00:12:59,954 --> 00:13:01,198 Look, my lord. 213 00:13:01,233 --> 00:13:02,247 It comes. 214 00:13:03,794 --> 00:13:05,428 Oh, Jesus. 215 00:13:07,081 --> 00:13:11,199 Look, with what courteous action it waves you to a more removed ground. 216 00:13:11,234 --> 00:13:12,543 But do not go with it. 217 00:13:14,876 --> 00:13:17,735 - Geoffrey! - Oh, no. 218 00:13:17,770 --> 00:13:19,270 Welcome home. 219 00:13:20,608 --> 00:13:22,633 Here you are, back at the Swan. 220 00:13:22,668 --> 00:13:24,106 It's about time! 221 00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:26,784 This is where you earned your stripes. 222 00:13:26,819 --> 00:13:29,811 Romeo, Marc Anthony, Princ Hel. 223 00:13:29,817 --> 00:13:32,675 And the other prince. Dare I speak his name? 224 00:13:32,710 --> 00:13:34,816 What is happening here? You're dead! 225 00:13:35,343 --> 00:13:40,343 Apparently there's an afterlife. Despite what they taught us in university. 226 00:13:40,390 --> 00:13:42,035 Now, you answer me a question. 227 00:13:42,070 --> 00:13:46,186 What's all this nonsense about you not being mentally equipped to take on Hamlet? 228 00:13:46,606 --> 00:13:48,639 - I mean, I know you're crazy, but... - Please. 229 00:13:48,674 --> 00:13:52,304 But I thought that's why you returned. To take up my mantle. 230 00:13:52,339 --> 00:13:55,935 - To snatch the festival from apathy's yawning moan... - Oliver! 231 00:13:55,970 --> 00:13:57,037 Or am I wrong? 232 00:13:58,550 --> 00:14:02,134 Was it love's siren song that brought you crashing on this rocks? 233 00:14:02,169 --> 00:14:04,343 I don't know why I'm here. I hate this fucking place. 234 00:14:04,378 --> 00:14:07,233 And I don't blame you. Drove you mad, didn't it? 235 00:14:07,313 --> 00:14:09,417 And it killed me. 236 00:14:09,446 --> 00:14:13,460 Revenge my foul and most unnatural murder! 237 00:14:13,495 --> 00:14:15,483 - Geoffrey? - Stop it! 238 00:14:16,050 --> 00:14:17,284 Excuse me, Geoffrey. 239 00:14:17,319 --> 00:14:20,860 Are you available to do a press thing with Basil at five? 240 00:14:22,580 --> 00:14:23,806 Yeah. 241 00:14:24,446 --> 00:14:26,317 Do you need some more time? 242 00:14:26,352 --> 00:14:28,189 - I mean... - No. It's fine. 243 00:14:28,937 --> 00:14:30,851 - Okay. We'll do it in the bar. - Good. 244 00:14:32,441 --> 00:14:34,714 It's funny seeing you on that stage again. 245 00:14:35,626 --> 00:14:37,341 Funny in a good way. 246 00:14:44,407 --> 00:14:46,730 What is that like? I mean... 247 00:14:47,135 --> 00:14:50,311 Seeing yourself up there? Doesn't that just sort of blow your mind? 248 00:14:50,346 --> 00:14:52,188 Well, it's a part, right? 249 00:14:53,140 --> 00:14:54,907 I'm watching it and I'm like... 250 00:14:54,942 --> 00:14:56,182 Why did they use that take? 251 00:14:56,217 --> 00:14:59,161 Or I remember freezing in that T-shirt because it was Vancouver in November 252 00:14:59,196 --> 00:15:01,397 - and not New York in July. - Okay. 253 00:15:01,626 --> 00:15:02,776 But I like to watch my movies, 254 00:15:02,811 --> 00:15:04,933 cause you get to see what works with the audience, you know? 255 00:15:04,968 --> 00:15:06,851 It's cool. You don't get that in theatre. 256 00:15:07,478 --> 00:15:11,668 Well, no, the audience is right there. You know immediately if it's working or not. 257 00:15:11,703 --> 00:15:14,704 - Yeah, but it's not the same. - No, it's better! 258 00:15:14,720 --> 00:15:18,014 Yeah, but if you're checking at audience all the time, then you're not in the moment, right? 259 00:15:18,049 --> 00:15:20,913 - Well... - You've done a lot more theatre than I have, but that's true, right? 260 00:15:21,173 --> 00:15:23,237 Watch out. I'm huge in Japan. 261 00:15:25,230 --> 00:15:30,230 So how is it exactly that you got to play Hamlet on the main stage in the festival? 262 00:15:31,045 --> 00:15:32,951 They offered it to me. 263 00:15:33,110 --> 00:15:35,390 Life's just fucking nuts, isn't it? 264 00:15:38,620 --> 00:15:41,015 No, I'm in New Burbage! 265 00:15:41,196 --> 00:15:43,781 I'm going to do their Hamlet. 266 00:15:43,816 --> 00:15:45,295 Hamlet! 267 00:15:46,135 --> 00:15:47,191 I know. 268 00:15:47,226 --> 00:15:49,903 Life is fucking nuts, isn't it? 269 00:15:50,361 --> 00:15:51,739 Thank you for doing this, Geoffrey. 270 00:15:51,774 --> 00:15:54,817 It's just a little get-acquainted piece for greyherds. 271 00:15:55,020 --> 00:15:57,220 Totally painless. You ready? 272 00:16:01,677 --> 00:16:02,955 Geoffrey Tennant. 273 00:16:02,990 --> 00:16:05,420 - Artistic director of... - Interim artistic director. 274 00:16:05,455 --> 00:16:09,250 I'm really just a figurehead. I have no job responsibilities. 275 00:16:11,176 --> 00:16:15,668 Interim artistic director of the New Burbage Festival. 276 00:16:15,703 --> 00:16:20,703 How does it feel to return to New Burbage after seven-year absence? 277 00:16:21,402 --> 00:16:23,134 It's a little disorienting. 278 00:16:26,160 --> 00:16:29,996 You and Oliver Welles were famously close. 279 00:16:30,432 --> 00:16:32,696 Infamously close, yes. 280 00:16:32,731 --> 00:16:36,224 Would you say that your own bold directorial voice 281 00:16:36,259 --> 00:16:39,718 developed in reaction to your former mentor's more 282 00:16:39,753 --> 00:16:41,049 conservative style? 283 00:16:41,428 --> 00:16:42,477 Well, Basil, I... 284 00:16:42,512 --> 00:16:46,478 Will you be taking over direction of the festival's flagship production of Hamlet? 285 00:16:47,246 --> 00:16:48,289 No. 286 00:16:49,039 --> 00:16:50,908 No, it wouldn't be correct to say? 287 00:16:50,943 --> 00:16:54,635 - No. Darren Nichols is directing it. - Darren Nichols? 288 00:16:54,816 --> 00:16:56,151 - You hate him! - Sorry? 289 00:16:56,518 --> 00:16:57,550 Basil. 290 00:16:58,144 --> 00:17:02,313 I have no idea what my bold directorial voice might be. 291 00:17:04,078 --> 00:17:05,274 Let me rephrase the question. 292 00:17:05,309 --> 00:17:09,666 You once stormed the stage during a college production of The Tempest directed by Darren. 293 00:17:09,701 --> 00:17:11,815 - You started tearing the set with your bare hands! - How would you characterize 294 00:17:11,850 --> 00:17:13,396 Oliver Welles' directive style? 295 00:17:13,431 --> 00:17:15,861 He set The Tempest in Nazi Germany! 296 00:17:15,896 --> 00:17:18,257 There were swastikas everywhere! 297 00:17:18,292 --> 00:17:20,840 Oliver Welles? I'm not aware of that production. 298 00:17:20,875 --> 00:17:23,190 No, no. Darren. Darren Nichols. 299 00:17:23,225 --> 00:17:26,675 - That man is an idiot. - And yet, you let him direct Hamlet. Why? 300 00:17:26,710 --> 00:17:28,475 - Darren Nichols? - Stop it! 301 00:17:32,856 --> 00:17:34,650 - Let's move on. - Please. 302 00:17:34,740 --> 00:17:36,263 You, Geoffrey Tennant, are a coward. 303 00:17:36,298 --> 00:17:37,805 Fardels! 304 00:17:40,396 --> 00:17:42,208 Fardels. 305 00:17:42,706 --> 00:17:43,728 So... 306 00:17:44,503 --> 00:17:48,547 Would you care to comment on any other productions currently onstage at the festival? 307 00:17:48,582 --> 00:17:49,703 Yes, Oliver, I would. 308 00:17:49,791 --> 00:17:51,706 These great texts, 309 00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:54,924 The Cherry Orchard, Midsummer Night's Dream, 310 00:17:54,959 --> 00:17:57,873 they come across as television specials. 311 00:17:57,908 --> 00:18:00,621 Theatre is meant to provoke. Not to anesthetize. 312 00:18:00,656 --> 00:18:03,335 Well, Darren is provocative, I'll give you that. 313 00:18:03,385 --> 00:18:04,597 Hail Hitler! 314 00:18:04,632 --> 00:18:06,798 - Would you say... - Well, you're the one that's responsible! 315 00:18:07,417 --> 00:18:10,128 - I am? - You consciously commercionalised this festival. 316 00:18:10,163 --> 00:18:12,906 It became more about drawing people into the theatre 317 00:18:12,941 --> 00:18:15,161 as opposed drawing them up out of their seats. 318 00:18:15,808 --> 00:18:18,524 You know, that's a very good soundbite for you. 319 00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:19,947 And you wanna know why this happened? 320 00:18:19,982 --> 00:18:23,603 It's because you started to hate the theatre. And why? 321 00:18:23,618 --> 00:18:27,859 Well, perhaps it's because of gnawing guilt of past betrayals? 322 00:18:28,535 --> 00:18:31,276 And so you tried to kill it. How? 323 00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:34,018 - Through commodification! - I did? 324 00:18:34,636 --> 00:18:35,741 No! 325 00:18:36,133 --> 00:18:40,129 Look at this hidious mug that I stole from the gift shop this morning. 326 00:18:40,164 --> 00:18:41,797 Look at this. Art. 327 00:18:41,841 --> 00:18:44,362 Literally art as product. 328 00:18:44,397 --> 00:18:46,751 This is a crime! 329 00:18:47,385 --> 00:18:48,857 Fascinating. 330 00:18:48,962 --> 00:18:52,343 By the way, it was made in Malaysia. 331 00:18:52,378 --> 00:18:54,798 Made no doubt by children! 332 00:18:54,833 --> 00:18:58,582 And so you see, ladies and gentlemen, you are not the only victims here! 333 00:19:05,984 --> 00:19:07,058 Do you think 334 00:19:07,871 --> 00:19:10,079 you have enough for the greyherds? 335 00:19:10,516 --> 00:19:12,912 Oh, I think we have plenty for everyone. 336 00:19:13,151 --> 00:19:14,220 Thank you. 337 00:19:16,477 --> 00:19:17,609 - Hi. - Hi. 338 00:19:17,615 --> 00:19:18,712 That was 339 00:19:20,618 --> 00:19:21,966 - ... good. - Good. 340 00:19:22,447 --> 00:19:24,362 Why don't you go home and get some rest? 341 00:19:24,397 --> 00:19:26,580 These past few days have been very stressful for everyone. 342 00:19:26,615 --> 00:19:28,599 - Not just for you. - You know, Anna, 343 00:19:28,634 --> 00:19:32,497 sometimes your diplomacy comes off as condescension, but you're right. 344 00:19:35,018 --> 00:19:38,484 - I need to unwind. - Yeah. Don't we all. 345 00:20:22,869 --> 00:20:24,869 Artistic Director - Asshole 346 00:20:27,390 --> 00:20:28,455 Hi. 347 00:20:32,993 --> 00:20:34,878 - Hi. - Hi. 348 00:20:34,913 --> 00:20:37,073 Some people are upset about the interview. 349 00:20:37,108 --> 00:20:38,393 Yeah, I sense that. 350 00:20:38,428 --> 00:20:41,089 It's mainly just the actors and directors and... 351 00:20:41,419 --> 00:20:43,648 Well, most people, actually. 352 00:20:43,914 --> 00:20:45,001 Thanks. 353 00:20:45,823 --> 00:20:47,427 Just wanted to give you a heads-up. 354 00:20:47,802 --> 00:20:51,032 And you have the corporate workshop at ten. You ready for that? 355 00:20:51,664 --> 00:20:53,071 - No. - Okay. 356 00:20:53,106 --> 00:20:56,916 Darren has arrived and we've scheduled a table reading of Hamlet for one. 357 00:20:58,771 --> 00:21:01,803 - I really don't wanna do that. - You have to. 358 00:21:01,838 --> 00:21:04,639 Anna, we hate each other. We actually duelled in university. 359 00:21:04,674 --> 00:21:07,440 - Why would you want me to do that? - Well, three reasons. 360 00:21:07,475 --> 00:21:10,156 One, Richard is away in Toronto fundraising. 361 00:21:10,191 --> 00:21:13,519 So he can't do it. And two, you are the artistic director, after all. 362 00:21:13,714 --> 00:21:17,589 - And three... - Darren specifically requested that I do it? 363 00:21:18,049 --> 00:21:20,862 - He had us write it into his contract. - Piss-ant! 364 00:21:20,897 --> 00:21:25,686 And please, don't say anything horrible like "piss-ant" when you're introducing him. 365 00:21:28,198 --> 00:21:32,257 - You duelled in university? - With rapiers in quadrangle at midnight. 366 00:21:32,292 --> 00:21:33,994 That's how I got this scar. 367 00:21:36,104 --> 00:21:37,271 Corporate at ten. 368 00:21:38,375 --> 00:21:39,894 Don't tell them that story. 369 00:21:42,969 --> 00:21:44,577 We're all from Allied Acrylic. 370 00:21:45,204 --> 00:21:48,862 It's a company that makes plastic products for the construction industry. 371 00:21:49,122 --> 00:21:50,680 Most of us are from marketing. 372 00:21:51,095 --> 00:21:53,483 Except for Terry. He's from accounting. 373 00:21:53,774 --> 00:21:55,538 You're the numbers man! 374 00:21:56,519 --> 00:21:59,263 Okay, yeah. Yeah. 375 00:22:01,716 --> 00:22:03,183 Why are you here? 376 00:22:04,043 --> 00:22:05,170 We're here to 377 00:22:06,663 --> 00:22:10,211 improve management strategies and interpersonal communication skills 378 00:22:10,246 --> 00:22:14,071 through an examination of key works by the great English playwright William Shakespeare. 379 00:22:22,396 --> 00:22:23,440 Okay. 380 00:22:23,588 --> 00:22:25,877 Before we begin, let me ask you a question. 381 00:22:26,682 --> 00:22:28,680 Do any of you seriously believe 382 00:22:28,715 --> 00:22:33,715 that you are gonna sell more plastics products to the construction industry by studying, say... 383 00:22:33,826 --> 00:22:36,058 the crisis management techniques of Claudius, 384 00:22:36,093 --> 00:22:38,255 bearing in mind that he was a scheming villain 385 00:22:38,290 --> 00:22:40,601 who murdered his brother, married his sister-in-law 386 00:22:40,636 --> 00:22:43,368 in order to gain control over a kingdom? 387 00:22:47,478 --> 00:22:48,740 In the back? 388 00:22:49,375 --> 00:22:50,511 No? 389 00:22:50,845 --> 00:22:51,831 Neither do I. 390 00:22:51,866 --> 00:22:54,364 So let's get rid of the curriculum 391 00:22:55,623 --> 00:22:58,973 and I think we should just fuck around with some text. 392 00:23:07,398 --> 00:23:08,436 Hold on! 393 00:23:10,092 --> 00:23:11,380 So sorry. 394 00:23:11,516 --> 00:23:12,898 It's a superstition thingie. 395 00:23:13,125 --> 00:23:16,161 You're supposed to pinch understudies so that no misfortune happens to you. 396 00:23:16,196 --> 00:23:17,776 To me, I mean. 397 00:23:18,610 --> 00:23:21,335 That's a really stupid superstition. 398 00:23:22,152 --> 00:23:25,817 - So is it true? - Is what true? 399 00:23:26,032 --> 00:23:27,872 When I left you yesterday, you bumped into Jack 400 00:23:27,907 --> 00:23:30,348 and spent day with the said Thespian? 401 00:23:30,383 --> 00:23:32,646 - Jesus, who told you? - Everybody told me. 402 00:23:32,681 --> 00:23:34,078 You're the talk of the town. 403 00:23:34,248 --> 00:23:36,734 Is that all everybody does around here? They just gossip? 404 00:23:43,079 --> 00:23:46,894 - Man, your eyes are huge. - Shut up! 405 00:23:46,929 --> 00:23:49,146 So, he's not gay. 406 00:23:49,530 --> 00:23:52,990 Apparently not. I owe you a pint. 407 00:23:57,346 --> 00:23:58,507 I'm not late. 408 00:23:58,742 --> 00:23:59,854 I'm not. 409 00:24:00,796 --> 00:24:01,907 Sorry! 410 00:24:20,479 --> 00:24:22,279 Okay. Everyone settle, please. 411 00:24:22,451 --> 00:24:23,466 Geoffrey. 412 00:24:23,991 --> 00:24:26,417 Geoffrey! Can you just... 413 00:24:30,353 --> 00:24:32,440 Sorry. Welcome, everybody. 414 00:24:32,479 --> 00:24:34,130 I've been asked or... 415 00:24:34,955 --> 00:24:38,181 required, really, to introduce your director to you. 416 00:24:38,495 --> 00:24:40,384 You're very fortunate to have him. 417 00:24:40,419 --> 00:24:43,042 You will find many of his ideas are very interesting. 418 00:24:43,309 --> 00:24:44,461 Darren Nichols. 419 00:24:49,894 --> 00:24:51,481 Thank you, Geoffrey. 420 00:24:51,516 --> 00:24:56,166 Brevity is always appreciated, if for nothing else, for it's sheer novelty. 421 00:24:59,719 --> 00:25:00,977 Hello, everyone. 422 00:25:01,601 --> 00:25:05,656 I am Darren Nichols, deal with that. 423 00:25:06,452 --> 00:25:07,459 All right. 424 00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:09,392 Re: Hamlet. 425 00:25:10,182 --> 00:25:11,541 Hamlet. 426 00:25:13,355 --> 00:25:17,390 This play is dead. 427 00:25:17,777 --> 00:25:21,587 It has been dead for over three hundred years. 428 00:25:21,622 --> 00:25:24,109 It has been strip-mined for quotations 429 00:25:24,144 --> 00:25:27,965 and propped up like Lennon in his ice cave. 430 00:25:28,265 --> 00:25:30,567 I don't worship dead texts 431 00:25:31,052 --> 00:25:34,547 but that doesn't mean I don't find interest in them. 432 00:25:34,582 --> 00:25:36,559 Now, as to my vision, 433 00:25:36,795 --> 00:25:38,633 I'm taking the word rotten 434 00:25:38,651 --> 00:25:43,451 as in "something's rotten in the state of Denmark" very seriously. 435 00:25:44,388 --> 00:25:47,840 I want a rank and foul looking, 436 00:25:48,076 --> 00:25:53,076 foul acted and if possible, foul smelling Hamlet, 437 00:25:53,631 --> 00:25:58,631 a decomposed vessel somewhere between the swamp and the sewer. 438 00:25:59,631 --> 00:26:01,759 Anyway, that's the general idea. 439 00:26:02,238 --> 00:26:04,065 Questions? 440 00:26:05,352 --> 00:26:10,252 Okay, let's read this corpse! 441 00:26:11,565 --> 00:26:13,411 Look, I don't need any more ties. 442 00:26:13,446 --> 00:26:15,257 Yes, you do. Your ties are horrible. 443 00:26:15,497 --> 00:26:17,824 No, they're not. They're nice. 444 00:26:17,859 --> 00:26:20,000 You should have a special tie for tonight. 445 00:26:20,460 --> 00:26:21,840 Look, please. 446 00:26:21,875 --> 00:26:23,574 I don't wanna see a show. 447 00:26:23,609 --> 00:26:25,274 My whole life is shows. 448 00:26:27,476 --> 00:26:31,971 - Okay, what show? - Mamma Mia, two tickets, first row balcony. 449 00:26:34,315 --> 00:26:35,725 I like this one. 450 00:26:36,835 --> 00:26:39,187 And for your part, Ophelia, 451 00:26:39,429 --> 00:26:41,024 I do wish that your good beauties 452 00:26:41,059 --> 00:26:43,399 be the happy cause of Hamlet's wildness. 453 00:26:43,434 --> 00:26:44,869 So shall I hope your virtues 454 00:26:44,904 --> 00:26:48,378 will bring him to his wonted way again, to both your honours. 455 00:26:49,058 --> 00:26:51,419 Madam, I wish it may. 456 00:26:52,677 --> 00:26:54,513 Enter Hamlet. 457 00:26:55,958 --> 00:26:58,401 Here it comes. The big one. 458 00:27:03,496 --> 00:27:05,137 To be, or not to be. 459 00:27:05,172 --> 00:27:06,778 That is the question. 460 00:27:07,273 --> 00:27:11,037 Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the stings and arr... 461 00:27:12,242 --> 00:27:13,518 Sorry. 462 00:27:16,272 --> 00:27:18,096 The slings and arr... 463 00:27:19,707 --> 00:27:23,113 Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and... 464 00:27:24,354 --> 00:27:27,937 The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune 465 00:27:28,561 --> 00:27:30,586 or to take arms against a sea of troubles 466 00:27:30,621 --> 00:27:32,519 and by opposing end them? 467 00:27:33,701 --> 00:27:37,903 Well, he's Darren's problem, isn't he? 468 00:27:38,542 --> 00:27:40,352 There's a daisy. 469 00:27:40,592 --> 00:27:42,838 I would give you some violets. 470 00:27:43,594 --> 00:27:46,773 But they withered all when my father died. 471 00:27:47,016 --> 00:27:49,683 They say he made a good end. 472 00:27:50,500 --> 00:27:54,798 For bonny sweet Robin is all my joy. 473 00:27:55,248 --> 00:27:56,992 Maybe I'm in hell. 474 00:27:57,571 --> 00:27:59,905 This is what I always imagined it would be like. 475 00:28:00,900 --> 00:28:04,934 Stifling eternal. The air filled with the shrieks of the damned. 476 00:28:05,130 --> 00:28:07,373 Go to thy death-bed. 477 00:28:07,673 --> 00:28:09,383 She's hard to get rid of, that one. 478 00:28:09,418 --> 00:28:11,938 Some boardmember's evil niece, I believe. 479 00:28:12,971 --> 00:28:14,456 She's not your problem, is she? 480 00:28:14,491 --> 00:28:15,942 None of this is your problem. 481 00:28:16,123 --> 00:28:19,612 You're just an interim artistic director. A figurehead. 482 00:28:19,647 --> 00:28:23,548 - Isn't that what you... - Oh, for the love of god, will you shut up? 483 00:28:30,094 --> 00:28:31,952 Five minutes, everyone. 484 00:28:39,346 --> 00:28:43,834 Geoffrey, I see you've added turrets to your litany of mental complaints. 485 00:28:43,869 --> 00:28:46,563 Darren, listen, I fully expect you to crush this play 486 00:28:46,598 --> 00:28:49,556 with your porkfist of theatrics and I'm all right with that. 487 00:28:50,286 --> 00:28:52,982 But if you are planning on using a horse, 488 00:28:53,017 --> 00:28:56,651 do us a favour and stick it in front of her, would ya? 489 00:29:04,724 --> 00:29:08,096 - Yes! Yes! - Fantastic! 490 00:29:08,131 --> 00:29:13,091 Yes, that was fantastic! Oh, my... Man! The dancing and the singing! 491 00:29:13,126 --> 00:29:15,594 - I listened to every word! - I know. 492 00:29:15,629 --> 00:29:17,632 I swear to God, it gets better every time. 493 00:29:18,526 --> 00:29:19,634 Thank you. 494 00:29:20,020 --> 00:29:22,910 This goes to show you gotta keep things in perspective, you know? 495 00:29:23,131 --> 00:29:27,135 I saw Chorus Line when I was 16 on Broadway. 496 00:29:27,603 --> 00:29:31,484 I was blown away. You know, I cried. 497 00:29:31,510 --> 00:29:32,679 I loved that show. 498 00:29:32,714 --> 00:29:34,038 It's what made me wanna go to the theatre. 499 00:29:34,073 --> 00:29:36,028 I used to listen to all those albums, you know. 500 00:29:36,063 --> 00:29:38,233 Damn Yankees. Kiss Me, Kate. 501 00:29:38,268 --> 00:29:40,403 My parents thought I was gay. 502 00:29:40,692 --> 00:29:43,243 How the hell did I end up in New Burbage? 503 00:29:43,278 --> 00:29:44,575 How did that even happen? 504 00:29:44,610 --> 00:29:47,691 Do not torture yourself. Come on, let's go for a drink. 505 00:29:48,552 --> 00:29:53,486 - You know what they are? Pure entertainment. - That's right! 506 00:29:53,521 --> 00:29:57,918 I'm so sick of hearing it's a dense play. Or "It's a difficult play". 507 00:29:57,953 --> 00:30:00,830 I've never seen anyone come dancing and singing out of Swan like we just did. 508 00:30:00,865 --> 00:30:02,827 I know! And why do you think that is? 509 00:30:02,862 --> 00:30:04,754 Cause Shakespeare! Shakespeare is like... 510 00:30:04,789 --> 00:30:07,779 - Four hundred years old! - And I don't even think he's that good. 511 00:30:09,055 --> 00:30:10,184 There, I said it. 512 00:30:11,335 --> 00:30:13,169 I mean, you know, in entertaining people. 513 00:30:13,204 --> 00:30:16,453 And I'm not saying ABBA were better writers... 514 00:30:17,017 --> 00:30:18,212 No, no. I know what you mean. 515 00:30:22,246 --> 00:30:25,156 - I don't like Shakespeare. - Nobody does, Richard! 516 00:30:25,522 --> 00:30:27,162 That's the thing. 517 00:30:27,567 --> 00:30:30,226 You put on plays that nobody wants to see. 518 00:30:30,267 --> 00:30:31,577 God, what a waste. 519 00:30:31,612 --> 00:30:32,677 You're right. 520 00:30:34,802 --> 00:30:35,863 You're right. 521 00:30:36,446 --> 00:30:39,617 You know what? I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. 522 00:30:40,167 --> 00:30:43,781 Over the past five years I have been working with a group of people, 523 00:30:43,816 --> 00:30:45,924 mostly lawyers and musicians, 524 00:30:45,937 --> 00:30:48,185 on developing a musical 525 00:30:48,621 --> 00:30:51,925 based on the life of John Lennon. 526 00:30:52,344 --> 00:30:54,146 - No! - We are this close to securing the rights. 527 00:30:54,181 --> 00:30:55,459 I've already spoken to Yoko. 528 00:30:55,759 --> 00:30:56,886 Ono? 529 00:30:56,930 --> 00:30:59,608 Oh, my God. My God, that could be huge! 530 00:30:59,643 --> 00:31:02,548 - Yeah. - It's got everything. It's got romance, music. 531 00:31:02,583 --> 00:31:04,338 - Murder in New York City. - I know! 532 00:31:04,373 --> 00:31:06,976 Oh, God, Richard. There is so much I wanna tell you. 533 00:31:07,011 --> 00:31:09,276 About my vision of the future. 534 00:31:10,681 --> 00:31:12,019 Your future. 535 00:31:14,731 --> 00:31:16,194 Let's go back to my condo. 536 00:31:18,038 --> 00:31:19,569 I'm gonna blow your mind. 537 00:31:20,919 --> 00:31:22,048 Okay. 538 00:31:22,527 --> 00:31:25,464 He wants me to smell myself. That's what he said. 539 00:31:25,694 --> 00:31:27,691 Maybe it's a hint, Ducky. 540 00:31:27,917 --> 00:31:30,556 Typical Darren. Everything has to be so outrageous. 541 00:31:30,991 --> 00:31:33,763 I'll never forget been stepped on by that horse. 542 00:31:34,342 --> 00:31:36,866 Geoffrey isn't a fan, I understand. 543 00:31:36,901 --> 00:31:39,637 - Oh, Geoffrey hates Darren. - He hates everything. 544 00:31:41,389 --> 00:31:44,725 Did you hear what he said about Cherry Orchard last night? 545 00:31:44,858 --> 00:31:48,206 - Dreadful things. - He made that young one cry. 546 00:31:48,241 --> 00:31:50,384 - Little Edward. - Excuse me. 547 00:31:52,023 --> 00:31:54,902 - You can't drink here. - Oh, hello, Ellen. 548 00:31:54,975 --> 00:31:57,868 Where's your boyfriend? Cub Scout meeting? 549 00:31:57,903 --> 00:31:59,392 You're upsetting everyone. 550 00:31:59,570 --> 00:32:02,074 You know, I remember a day when the actors would've been thrilled 551 00:32:02,109 --> 00:32:04,578 to have the artistic director joined them at the bar. 552 00:32:04,650 --> 00:32:08,098 You go around slandering everyone and expect them to buy you a drink? 553 00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:11,917 Well, some people welcome criticism. 554 00:32:11,952 --> 00:32:15,322 In fact, some of them believe that the integrity of this festival 555 00:32:15,357 --> 00:32:19,373 has been undermined by the complacency of the old guard. 556 00:32:19,408 --> 00:32:20,627 That would be you. 557 00:32:23,350 --> 00:32:25,423 Everyone! Yuhoo! 558 00:32:25,458 --> 00:32:29,835 Drinks at my place for anyone who's uncomfortable here. 559 00:32:29,870 --> 00:32:31,115 Just a short drink. 560 00:32:31,325 --> 00:32:32,850 Where do you live? 561 00:32:34,525 --> 00:32:36,895 23 Glandon Road. Just off Trinity. 562 00:32:36,930 --> 00:32:39,266 Yellowish-gold Tudors cottagey style. 563 00:32:39,301 --> 00:32:41,450 Just follow me. Now! Come. Now. 564 00:32:43,361 --> 00:32:47,174 Oh, God. Sorry. I mean... Just the Hamlet people. 565 00:32:47,209 --> 00:32:49,518 I don't have enough liquor. Sorry! 566 00:32:50,012 --> 00:32:51,071 Come. 567 00:32:54,007 --> 00:32:58,510 I also remember time when this place was all about getting laid. 568 00:32:59,265 --> 00:33:00,853 We could buy up the town of New Burbage. 569 00:33:01,019 --> 00:33:04,298 Cosmopolitan Lenstrex is on board so the startup shouldn't be a problem. 570 00:33:04,333 --> 00:33:08,735 We could expand the festival out of town. Make it sort of theatrical theme park, right? 571 00:33:08,788 --> 00:33:12,499 And exhibits. And big budget musicals like Mamma Mia. 572 00:33:12,534 --> 00:33:15,058 Can you imagine? Come here! 573 00:33:16,081 --> 00:33:17,351 We'll make millions! 574 00:33:17,464 --> 00:33:19,481 You know where I got the idea for this, Richard? 575 00:33:19,702 --> 00:33:20,948 From you. Yeah. 576 00:33:20,983 --> 00:33:22,789 From your silly gift shop. 577 00:33:22,824 --> 00:33:25,245 Imagine if the whole town was a gift shop. 578 00:33:25,702 --> 00:33:27,316 Oh, God! Oh, God! 579 00:33:28,337 --> 00:33:31,362 Oh, make me rich, baby! 580 00:33:47,031 --> 00:33:49,160 Okay, that's good. But... 581 00:33:49,537 --> 00:33:52,666 What you're talking about here is loss. 582 00:33:53,511 --> 00:33:57,540 Catastrophic, gnawing absence. 583 00:33:58,355 --> 00:34:01,449 Your wife has died and 584 00:34:02,188 --> 00:34:04,953 what does this really mean? 585 00:34:05,184 --> 00:34:06,336 When I think 586 00:34:06,794 --> 00:34:08,783 human beings, all human beings 587 00:34:08,818 --> 00:34:12,189 are by nature selfish and so when we mourn, 588 00:34:12,224 --> 00:34:15,916 we're actually mourning part of ourselves that has died. 589 00:34:16,561 --> 00:34:20,542 You have now lost the person that defined you. 590 00:34:20,577 --> 00:34:24,524 And so in a sense you have lost your identity. 591 00:34:24,769 --> 00:34:27,818 Who are you now without her? 592 00:34:28,649 --> 00:34:33,544 And you are uncomfortable inside your own skin. 593 00:34:34,240 --> 00:34:38,445 You have become a stranger even to yourself. 594 00:34:40,788 --> 00:34:42,156 Okay? 595 00:34:48,472 --> 00:34:50,667 Queen, my lord, is dead. 596 00:34:54,289 --> 00:34:56,690 She should have died hereafter. 597 00:34:57,749 --> 00:35:00,613 There would have been a time for such a word. 598 00:35:01,846 --> 00:35:03,307 To-morrow, 599 00:35:03,330 --> 00:35:04,647 and to-morrow, 600 00:35:04,905 --> 00:35:08,780 and to-morrow creeps in this 601 00:35:09,059 --> 00:35:13,847 petty pace from day to day, 602 00:35:15,452 --> 00:35:18,660 to the last syllable 603 00:35:19,054 --> 00:35:21,070 of recorded time. 604 00:35:22,078 --> 00:35:25,080 And all our yesterdays have lighted fools 605 00:35:25,115 --> 00:35:27,711 the way to dusty death. 606 00:35:28,956 --> 00:35:32,265 Out, out, brief candle! 607 00:35:33,977 --> 00:35:36,652 Life's but a walking shadow, 608 00:35:37,765 --> 00:35:39,897 a poor player 609 00:35:40,264 --> 00:35:44,588 that struts and frets his hour upon the stage 610 00:35:45,571 --> 00:35:47,963 and then is heard no more. 611 00:35:49,636 --> 00:35:52,840 It is a tale told by an idiot, 612 00:35:54,301 --> 00:35:57,312 full of sound and fury, 613 00:35:58,460 --> 00:36:00,562 signifying nothing. 614 00:36:06,590 --> 00:36:08,115 Very nice. 615 00:36:13,678 --> 00:36:14,722 Okay. 616 00:36:15,267 --> 00:36:16,267 Let's call it a day. 617 00:36:16,302 --> 00:36:18,209 Those of you who don't have a really long commute, 618 00:36:18,244 --> 00:36:19,744 you're welcome to join us at the theatre bar. 619 00:36:19,779 --> 00:36:21,720 And first drink, Terry, is on me. 620 00:36:25,042 --> 00:36:26,676 Thank you. Thanks. 621 00:36:26,711 --> 00:36:27,715 Thanks. 622 00:36:30,126 --> 00:36:34,968 You were great. Really, really great. 623 00:36:38,492 --> 00:36:40,036 Fuck, I love this. 624 00:36:40,937 --> 00:36:43,361 Ghost! Step forward. 625 00:36:43,396 --> 00:36:44,451 And Horatio! 626 00:36:44,782 --> 00:36:48,843 - Look, my lord... - And then the flames shoot up with pyrotechnics here, 627 00:36:48,878 --> 00:36:49,913 here, 628 00:36:50,562 --> 00:36:53,189 here and here! 629 00:36:53,224 --> 00:36:56,064 So look out, people, or you'll be burned alive. 630 00:36:56,099 --> 00:37:00,537 Then Hamlet! You see your dead father risen from the grave 631 00:37:00,572 --> 00:37:02,741 and we fly him into here! 632 00:37:03,717 --> 00:37:05,122 And he hovers! 633 00:37:05,677 --> 00:37:06,761 Now, go. 634 00:37:06,897 --> 00:37:08,623 Angels and ministers of grace defend... 635 00:37:08,658 --> 00:37:11,596 Blah, blah, blah. Maria, what I want here is darkness. 636 00:37:11,631 --> 00:37:14,475 No light. Just flames. 637 00:37:14,510 --> 00:37:17,530 We'll need to went, but we can do that. 638 00:37:17,565 --> 00:37:20,550 Excellent! Now, Marcellus and Horatio. 639 00:37:20,715 --> 00:37:23,070 You must stay close to your horses. 640 00:37:23,105 --> 00:37:25,863 Because horses don't like fire. 641 00:37:26,022 --> 00:37:28,251 We learned that the hard way, didn't we, Ellen? 642 00:37:29,346 --> 00:37:32,510 I had no idea that theatre was so much like the movies. 643 00:37:34,074 --> 00:37:37,641 Gertrude is past her prime. 644 00:37:37,951 --> 00:37:39,761 Her hair is graying. 645 00:37:40,310 --> 00:37:45,249 Her tits are sagging. I want to see her age. 646 00:37:45,492 --> 00:37:48,632 And with Ellen that shouldn't be a problem. 647 00:37:48,667 --> 00:37:51,772 Sorry, darling. Bad dye job, roots are showing. 648 00:37:51,807 --> 00:37:54,505 I don't want to see any wigs. No wigs! 649 00:37:55,580 --> 00:37:58,685 I want yellow teeth and hairy legs. 650 00:37:58,795 --> 00:38:00,440 You inspire. 651 00:38:01,421 --> 00:38:02,794 You have vision. 652 00:38:02,829 --> 00:38:05,781 You mine the human soul for truth. 653 00:38:06,154 --> 00:38:07,403 Oh, God! 654 00:38:07,654 --> 00:38:09,091 It's a gift. 655 00:38:09,325 --> 00:38:13,558 And yet, you're waste it on accountants and middle managers. 656 00:38:14,677 --> 00:38:16,084 Shame, shame. 657 00:38:16,252 --> 00:38:17,702 What is wrong with me? 658 00:38:17,737 --> 00:38:19,153 Darren, it's five. 659 00:38:19,194 --> 00:38:21,699 Fucking unions! That's it, children. 660 00:38:22,063 --> 00:38:23,758 See you tomorrow. 661 00:38:24,841 --> 00:38:28,518 Everyone, remember? Drinks at my place tonight. 662 00:38:28,791 --> 00:38:29,981 All are welcome. 663 00:38:30,016 --> 00:38:31,172 Except Geoffrey. 664 00:38:35,799 --> 00:38:38,321 She never spoke to me before. Just like a... 665 00:38:39,053 --> 00:38:40,685 "Can I get my vacation pay now 666 00:38:40,720 --> 00:38:43,186 or do I have to wait to the end of the fiscal year" kinda thing. 667 00:38:43,221 --> 00:38:45,400 Well, you can act. 668 00:38:45,881 --> 00:38:47,680 That's a turn-on. 669 00:38:48,496 --> 00:38:49,938 Yes, it is! 670 00:38:50,202 --> 00:38:51,795 Yes, it is! 671 00:38:53,666 --> 00:38:55,193 Why don't you act anymore? 672 00:38:55,228 --> 00:38:58,433 Well, Terry, I had a nervous breakdown on the stage. 673 00:38:58,792 --> 00:39:01,804 - Ouch! - And I can never return. 674 00:39:02,064 --> 00:39:04,355 It's too humiliating to return. 675 00:39:05,842 --> 00:39:09,881 - Geoff, you gotta get back on that horse. - No. 676 00:39:09,916 --> 00:39:14,082 You gotta get back on that horse or you'll never get on a horse again. 677 00:39:14,117 --> 00:39:15,753 I don't wanna get on a horse again. 678 00:39:15,788 --> 00:39:17,774 I'd rather direct. 679 00:39:17,780 --> 00:39:20,892 Well, you're a good director. 680 00:39:20,927 --> 00:39:24,902 I mean, I don't know what I'm talking about, but.. 681 00:39:24,937 --> 00:39:28,877 You know, there is one thing about acting that I miss. 682 00:39:29,003 --> 00:39:30,524 What? 683 00:39:31,905 --> 00:39:34,429 I was in love with an actress. 684 00:39:35,119 --> 00:39:37,143 Beautiful, talented actress 685 00:39:37,178 --> 00:39:38,966 and when we were together on the stage, 686 00:39:39,001 --> 00:39:40,238 it was like 687 00:39:42,587 --> 00:39:44,919 It was like having sex in public. 688 00:39:46,526 --> 00:39:47,907 I love that. 689 00:39:47,942 --> 00:39:50,362 And I have never felt this close to anyone. 690 00:39:52,622 --> 00:39:57,558 We played all the great love scenes and we meant it. 691 00:39:59,090 --> 00:40:00,836 People would stand and they'd cheer 692 00:40:00,871 --> 00:40:03,795 and they would throw flowers 693 00:40:03,830 --> 00:40:08,569 and then we would go home and we would make love and that... 694 00:40:12,128 --> 00:40:13,793 I miss that. 695 00:40:15,975 --> 00:40:19,088 Because life cannot compete with that. 696 00:40:23,453 --> 00:40:25,624 I can't compete with that. 697 00:40:28,821 --> 00:40:30,027 Come on. 698 00:40:34,459 --> 00:40:36,594 I need you to be my second. 699 00:40:37,740 --> 00:40:39,360 Okay. 700 00:40:40,370 --> 00:40:41,911 What's a second? 701 00:40:45,012 --> 00:40:47,138 And he said, he said, 702 00:40:47,298 --> 00:40:49,810 'I could go out tilting at windmills' and I said 703 00:40:49,845 --> 00:40:52,288 'Oh really, could you, my friend' and he said 'yes', 704 00:40:52,323 --> 00:40:55,185 'show me', and this is right in the dressing room, mind you, 705 00:40:55,220 --> 00:40:57,419 so there he did it, and I said 706 00:40:57,454 --> 00:41:01,093 'you sir, are no Peter O'Toole, put it back in your pants, darling'. 707 00:41:04,945 --> 00:41:08,939 - He does go on, doesn't he? - He was born talking, Ducky. 708 00:41:09,136 --> 00:41:11,751 "A funny thing happened to me on the way out of the womb," he said 709 00:41:11,786 --> 00:41:14,308 as the doctor slapped his little butt. 710 00:41:14,570 --> 00:41:15,840 Sorry! Excuse me. 711 00:41:15,875 --> 00:41:17,793 Sorry, not the sideboard. 712 00:41:20,950 --> 00:41:23,056 Okay, I just... I have to ask you. 713 00:41:24,021 --> 00:41:27,608 - Have you gone out with supermodels? - Not supermodels. 714 00:41:27,882 --> 00:41:29,840 - Models? - Yeah. 715 00:41:30,266 --> 00:41:31,886 But no supermodels, I swear. 716 00:41:31,921 --> 00:41:36,409 Well, one supermodel, but she was just a regural model when I was going out with her. 717 00:41:37,373 --> 00:41:38,730 Was she beautiful? 718 00:41:39,330 --> 00:41:40,573 No. 719 00:41:40,870 --> 00:41:42,795 She was one of those ugly models. 720 00:41:42,830 --> 00:41:45,994 She modelled like bandages and farm clothes and stuff. 721 00:41:51,249 --> 00:41:53,556 Do you wanna sneak out for a walk or something? 722 00:41:54,412 --> 00:41:55,814 Yeah, sure. 723 00:41:56,334 --> 00:41:57,950 It's really warm out. 724 00:41:58,974 --> 00:42:00,350 I know where we can go. 725 00:42:13,773 --> 00:42:15,332 - Terry. - Yeah? 726 00:42:15,598 --> 00:42:17,365 Bring the weaponry. 727 00:42:17,805 --> 00:42:18,996 Coming! 728 00:42:19,215 --> 00:42:21,497 What are we doing here? 729 00:42:24,510 --> 00:42:26,313 Geoff! Wait! 730 00:42:31,259 --> 00:42:33,120 What noise is this? 731 00:42:33,592 --> 00:42:35,043 Oh, my God! 732 00:42:36,474 --> 00:42:38,034 There's the villain. 733 00:42:38,115 --> 00:42:41,105 - Terry. - Yeah? - Give him his rapier. 734 00:42:42,499 --> 00:42:43,593 Hi. 735 00:42:44,588 --> 00:42:46,882 What kind of game is this, Geoffrey? 736 00:42:46,917 --> 00:42:49,089 You are a pompous fool. 737 00:42:49,314 --> 00:42:53,190 You have no respect for the stage of no business working in the theater. 738 00:42:53,225 --> 00:42:54,786 You slaughter the text. 739 00:42:54,821 --> 00:42:57,569 You fill the stage with animals! 740 00:42:57,604 --> 00:42:58,699 You... 741 00:43:00,221 --> 00:43:02,207 You're just an all-round goof. 742 00:43:02,228 --> 00:43:04,240 - Take up your weapon! - Not again. 743 00:43:04,275 --> 00:43:06,534 Terry, clear the killing field! 744 00:43:06,951 --> 00:43:08,367 Buttons off! 745 00:43:09,563 --> 00:43:11,653 Geoffrey, what the hell are you doing? 746 00:43:11,688 --> 00:43:13,743 I don't want to fight you, Geoffrey. 747 00:43:13,751 --> 00:43:15,731 If it be now, 'tis not to come. 748 00:43:15,778 --> 00:43:18,422 If it be not to come, it will be now. 749 00:43:18,879 --> 00:43:21,209 If it be not now, yet it will come. 750 00:43:21,244 --> 00:43:22,979 The readiness is all! 751 00:43:23,573 --> 00:43:25,728 And you call me pompous. 752 00:43:42,977 --> 00:43:44,498 Oh, for fuck's sake. 753 00:43:47,421 --> 00:43:49,730 - I'm calling the police! - Kill the ass-hole! 754 00:43:50,206 --> 00:43:52,417 Actors, not horses! 755 00:43:52,932 --> 00:43:55,203 Smell your own armpits! 756 00:44:00,069 --> 00:44:02,032 Run for your lives! 757 00:44:10,207 --> 00:44:11,314 Actors! 758 00:44:11,331 --> 00:44:13,808 You're all the same! 759 00:44:13,838 --> 00:44:15,530 You're all a bunch 760 00:44:15,565 --> 00:44:21,031 of selfish, filthy, whiny children! 761 00:44:21,104 --> 00:44:24,089 Well, fuck you all! 762 00:44:24,124 --> 00:44:27,075 Fuck off, you fuckers! 763 00:44:36,980 --> 00:44:39,083 Guess I'd better call the cab, it's... 764 00:44:39,404 --> 00:44:41,598 I'm going to kill you. 765 00:44:43,112 --> 00:44:44,114 Get him! 766 00:45:00,744 --> 00:45:01,893 Go ahead. 767 00:45:07,837 --> 00:45:08,922 It's good. 768 00:45:09,563 --> 00:45:10,980 Very nice. 769 00:45:12,366 --> 00:45:14,366 EN synchro: namuras 58351

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