All language subtitles for Two.Much.With.Kajol.and.Twinkle.S01E01.Aamir.Khan.and.Salman.Khan.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.265-Vegamovies.hot

When they said “Two better than one”,
they didn't really mean us.

“Coolie!”

-I mean, we have an ex in common.
-Shut the fuck up.

“Two Much” isn't just a show,

it's trauma for the guests.

-Is this where you roast us?
- Yeah

Please, this episode…

But it's therapy, for us.

-Wow!
-A lot of male hosts,

they don't bring up questions that
women really want to ask.

What do you think women
have to face today?

Just be yourself and
the world will deal with it.

I like this answer!

Twinkle here can fully judge
your posture, grammar and life choices.

You’ve become very spiffy.

I’ve learnt quite a bit of English,
but I don’t know “Spiffy” yet.

Two things you should not discuss with me,

my age and my waist.

One stare from Kajol

and everyone will just confess
their deepest, darkest, secrets.

-Children, I will have.
-What?

-When?
-Soon.

-Oh, no!
-No fear.

No filter.

Just…

Full on fun!

Hello, everyone,
and welcome to Two Much.

So, one of our guests today
is known as the eternal bachelor.

But I think we've ruined his chances

of getting married
by calling him "brother".

And we call the other guest
Mr. Perfectionist.

There is so much pressure in
small interviews

turn into five-hour podcasts.

So we thought,

on behalf of the entire country,
we should invite him here to apologize.

-I didn't sleep all night…
-I have trigeminal neuralgia.

Is there some issue
with your "Tri" as well?

Listen. You are one loose cannon,

and we have two more there.

Give it up for Aamir Khan…

and Salman Khan.

Let's go, brother.

When will these two hours
come to an end?

We don't have an audience,
but we are clapping for you.

Full on.

Hi!

We would offer you the couch,
but we don't want to cast you.

-Okay.
-So…

We will lead you to the grazing table

where we will feed you,
and then we will grill you.

-All right.
-Let's go.

-Sure.
-Basically, both of you

are our cattle.

-We shall welcome you with a treat!
-Come on.

-What do we have today?
-Oh! This is amazing!

-This is a lot of food.
-Yes.

- Dabeli .
-Yes!

-I can feel you.
-Some of these are your favorites.

-Yeah.
-And some are really

-icky stuff.
-Can we have this?

-You know that's really good stuff.
-Of course, you can eat.

-We ordered it for you.
-They did an interview yesterday.

These are leftovers from there.

They had sprayed a repellent on it
to drive houseflies away,

and you've eaten it up.

He'll survive.
He has survived worse things.

I've seen him.

But I believe you are a big foodie.
Everyone who comes to your house

is not asked, "How are you?"
You ask them, "What will you eat?"

-"What will you eat?"
-Is that true?

That's true…

And we have heard lots about
your kitchen skills as well.

You make something
called "mixture". Am I right?

So that was when
I had just started working.

And when I used to leave the house

at that point in time,
everyone would be sleeping.

When I came back, everyone
would have gone back to sleep.

Whatever food was there at home…
The rice and whatever…

I would put it in a pan, heat it up,

and… Add some vegetables,
chicken, and mutton,

and along with some

cucumber, like that, and…

some beetroot and sweet pickle.

I used to eat that.

Can you make it for this hungry person?

With this, no matter who the chef is…

-Have you tried dabeli ?
-Yes. Many times.

-It's the Gujarati vada pav .
-I have had a lot of it.

-When I went to shoot Lagaan …
-Yes.

-Every evening, in Kachchh.
-A dabeli ?

-Can I offer you some--
-No, I am not going to eat.

-Biryani?
-I am not going to eat.

I will not stop eating if I start.

Okay. Just one bite. Come on.

And we promise, this is
very pure, clean…

And it's… Since you are
such a protein fan,

I have my very own
protein shake "recipe".

Which is some eggs, almond milk,
and orange juice.

-It sounds disgusting.
-It does sound disgusting.

-But it's actually quite tasty.
-Yeah.

-Orange juice and eggs?
-Yes.

Eggs should actually be eaten
only as eggs.

But you have to take a sip at least.

-This is it?
-Come on, try.

-All right.
-Oh God…

It's not so bad.

For the first time in life,
I had a cold batata vada .

He's dissing our food, babe.

-Cold.
-I know. Quickly!

-Nice watch there.
-Thanks.

-Yeah…
-There you go.

Fab!

Your screaming loudly
doesn't make it fab.

-It's fab!
-Must be 100% healthy.

This will 100%
upset my stomach.

It's better than what I had.

Once I went to someone's
house and he said,

"This is all organic.
The salad is from my garden.

I don't use anything.

I only fertilize it
with my own urine. "

Wow! Lovely. And you had it?

I had it as I was scared that if
I didn't, my house might get raided.

-I just ate it.
-And who was that?

I can't name him.

But now even our snacks
are saying "wrap up".

And we have to go to the main course.

-For the grilling.
-For your grilling.

-Come on.
- Dabeli was very good.

-You want something?
-No, I am good.

Some tea?

-Where do I sit?
-Wherever you like.

You want to sit on that side?

Which is your better side,
or something like that?

-All good.
-All sides are good?

-All good.
-Let's start at the beginning.

Do you remember when
we first met each other?

Must've been…

During the shooting
of Mela, I suppose.

-No.
-No? Okay, then?

God! I guess. I am so forgettable.

First time I met her, I think,
was in Mahabaleshwar or some place.

-Yes.
-You were studying.

I met… I saw him.
We didn't meet.

I saw him in Mahabaleshwar.
He was sitting with Sangeeta.

I remember very clearly.
He was wearing this

rainbow sweater, and I was on my cycle.

And I saw him. And I was looking at them,

and with the cycle, I fell into a ditch.

-That was the first time--
-You saw her going in the ditch?

-No.
-He didn't see me going into the ditch.

She told me the story--

There are times in life when
you want me to be in a ditch.

No. Never…

And you came to meet me in some studio,

and I was very chuffed,
the great Aamir Khan has come…

-Is it?
-To see me.

And it was a very
perfunctory conversation.

I can't remember what we said,
but as we were walking down,

I fell down the entire flight of stairs.

I landed at the bottom, on my bottom.

You walked down and you said,
"Do you do this often?"

Before you say it, I am not someone
stooped low. I am just clumsy,

and so are you.

Yeah. That sounds like me.

And Salman, the first time I met you
was on the set of Sangdil Sanam .

-Yeah.
-On my dad's sets.

And I remember coming up to you…

"Hi, Uncle. How are you?"
I was 12 years old.

-Uncle?
-I was 12.

It doesn't matter.

Her father and I used to be very close.

-Yeah.
-Very close.

He used to be home almost…
Twice a week.

In fact, just before he passed away

two days before, he had come home.

Came with the same energy,
wearing his lungi …

-His lungi … Multi-colored lungi . Yes.
-Kurta…

And he was going through
a very troubled patch.

He was not feeling well.
He said, "Pal, make me a drink. "

I said, "No, sir. I am…"

He said, "I am going
in a couple of days. "

-Oh…
-Oh!

I was like… He said, "Make me a drink. "

-Oh…
-I didn't know what to do.

He said, "Make it, pal. "

So then I made him a drink…

and then, two days later,
he was no more.

-And he was very close to--
-He wasn't well, is it?

-Yeah.
-He was not well.

And, he was very
close to Dad as well and…

And my father has great regard
for the whole family.

Whole family. One of the nicest families

in the film industry
is the Mukherjee family.

-Thank you.
-Such a nice thing to hear.

Yeah.

Now, but--That's well and fine,
but what about

your bromance? When did that start?

The first time
I remember we met was in

Aditya's house…
Aditya Bhattacharya.

-You--
-No recollection.

Aditya and I had made a short film.

-Okay.
-A 40-minute movie.

-So we were shooting for that.
-What was I doing there?

You had come on a cycle.
You had come to say "hi" to him

or something.

I still remember the visual because

you held on to the door of
his balcony and did pull-ups.

-I see.
-I remember.

-Quite possible. The first time--
-You came on a cycle.

That we were playing
a cricket match together and--

-That too. But that was later.
-Yeah.

Then I hit all his balls
out of the park.

Apparently, we were
in school together.

-Really?
-You all don't remember that--

-We don't remember that.
-We don't remember.

Because I was there
till the fourth grade.

Then I was thrown out of…

Why were you thrown out?

A faint memory.

-I was running with a friend of mine.
-Okay.

And he tripped over my leg,
and he fell.

Now people thought that I tripped him,
but that was not the case.

He fell and he chipped his…

-Tooth.
-Teeth.

So for that, they said…

"Not okay". And then there was,
I remember this one thing…

I was punished outside

the school.

My dad asked, "What has he done now?"
I was in grade four.

So then my dad came
and spoke to the teacher,

and the teacher said, "No, Mr. Khan.

-It is not his fault. It is your fault. "
-Oh!

He asked, "What did I do?" She said,
"You are supposed to pay the fees

You are not on time for the fees.
So we kept him outside. "

He said, "Then you should
be making me stand there. "

I remember. My parents couldn't
pay my fees on time, either.

And they would announce
our names in the assembly.

-Oh, God!
-After this,

my father went to the principal,
and he did whatever he could

paid the money, and then

two weeks later, this incident happened,
and they took me out of school.

You have never been
thrown out of school.

No. But I also ended up
shifting schools.

First, I was in Petit Girl's High School

-which was right next to my house.
-I can imagine that.

-We were--
-Why?

He's a pretty girl.

Avabai Petit. Because these two
allow boys till the second grade.

KG, High KG, First and Second.

After the second grade,
I went to St. Anne's.

After the 8th grade,
I shifted to Bombay Scottish.

-And then you stayed there?
-Only two years were left.

I have noticed something that,
aside from your last name,

you really don't have
that much in common.

He claims he is the eternal virgin.
He said it himself.

You have been married

-a couple of times.
-Twice…

You have three children.
He doesn't have any children.

Or maybe he has 12 and
we don't know about them.

No. You'd have known if I had.

-Definitely.
-Maybe you also don't know.

No. I would have been
the first one to know.

They would have come…

-So here are 12 children.
-Then what's different about us?

-What else?
-Both of you have

very different filmographies.

Both of you have
very different approaches to life

as well. Where…

You know, everything is concerned.
Your profession, mostly, is concerned.

Not personally, because
I think that both of you

are personally very much family men.

So how did this friendship
of yours happen?

This closeness. How did this happen?

Actually, I think that
it happened, you know,

when I went through my divorce with Reena.

If you remember,
you had come home for dinner.

And that is when Salman and I actually,
for the first time, connected properly.

You know. Because before that,
I used to feel

he was not punctual,
it was quite a problem.

During Andaz Apna Apna .

I want to say something, you know.

I was, back then, quite
judgmental, Salman.

Initially…

I was very harsh as a person.

"This is not right.
That man is not right.

He is doing this. "

-”Mr. Perfectionist”.
-No. It was just…

I don't know. I was just too hard
not only on others, but also on myself.

-Absolutely.
-Then I realized…

You know, we are humans,
and to err is human.

Then I went through a sea change.

Roughly, at that time.

After my divorce is
when I met you, Salman.

That's when I connected. You know…

-With him.
-That thing was…

That thing was always there.

But because we were working
together in Andaz Apna Apna

Mr. Aamir Khan, at that point
in time, used to show up on the set

at 7:00 a. m. in the morning.

-But he's supposed to…
-I'd report at the time I was asked to.

-He's supposed to.
-On a 9:00 a. m. shift.

-No. Nothing like that
-On a 9:00 a. m. shift.

-Possible.
-Because he had one movie.

I had 15 movies.

I used to work from 7:00 a. m. to 2:00 p. m.
Then 2:00 p. m. to 10:00 p. m.

And 10:00 p. m. to 5:00 a. m.

So by the time I used to come,
I'd be exhausted, and then

he used to go on with his rehearsals.

He would rehearse every scene
multiple times. Oh my God!

I'd say, "Once he's done with it,
call me for the take. "

-You just…
-So at that point in time--

So at that point in time,
he thought I was not

interested in my work.

How can anyone not
be interested in his work

when he is doing three shifts at a time?

I want to mimic him.

-Go ahead.
-So he used to come

after working three shifts,
so obviously he used to be tired.

So he used to come on set,

and we used to be very thrilled
to have made it by 12:00 p. m.

But he would go to sleep.

-I guess you were--
-On the couch.

On the couch or on the floor…

He would sleep.

Because they have been rehearsing
this since nine in the morning.

They were rehearsing,
so you got tired?

All I had to say was, "Uyi ma".

"Say my lines as well. "

This is all I had to say.
So why put energy into that?

-He has to put in effort.
-Let me show his mimicry.

On the set, he would sleep
and then wake up and have lunch.

We were like…

Half the day is gone.

So Raj and I used to
break down the scene

so that when he comes,
we can do it quickly.

He would come on
the set, and we would

show him the rehearsal.

Raj would play Salman's part,
and I would play mine.

When Salman is watching
the rehearsal for the first time.

We are showing him the rehearsal.

He used to look away.
We are showing him the rehearsal.

"Hey! How are you? All good?

Carry on. I am watching. "

"Uyi Ma. "

He was treating me like an assistant.

So, you know, all four of us
have one thing in common.

That we have done at least
one movie with each other.

-So either that experience--
-I have done two with you.

-Yeah. You have done two with me.
-Yeah.

-Why--
-We did Ishq and that movie…

-That…
- Fanaa .

We worked in Fanaa, and
the last one we did together.

- Salaam Venky .
- Salaam Venky .

-We've done three movies.
- Salaam Venky .

But why haven't you both done
a movie together? I want to know.

After Andaz Apna Apna,

now we'll do one.

- Andaz Apna Apna --
-That is not the question.

He said in interviews,
"I won't work with Salman".

I remember that.
I remember him saying this.

-That's true.
-Really?

-I mean, I was…
-Tired.

I am a straightforward man. I said…

Now if anyone asks,
I have to answer. So…

I said it is hard to work with him.

He takes so much time.
By the time he finishes…

"I see. " Salman has gone to sleep.

No. By then, he's finished
the whole scene, packed up, and gone.

But we also had great moments
during Andaz Apna Apna .

We'd burst into laughter
while doing a scene.

-Great time.
-The scenes were so funny.

But another thing that is
different about you people

is that you are supposedly
some marketing genius.

-Amish Tripathi told me this.
-Nothing like that.

Just wait.

He's told me he learned
how to market from you.

-Is it?
-And our friend

seems to do it all organically.

One of his movies was releasing, and his

marketing gimmick was that
he came on Twitter

and gave a high-five to the fans

-filled the theater.
- Bajrangi Bhaijaan .

-So are you all really…
-Superb movie.

-Sorry. Come again.
-Are you all really that different

in your marketing

-methods?
-No. See. Aamir's marketing

strategy is amazing.

He will go all out for marketing.

He will be dressed up as an old man

with fake teeth and like
a beggar somewhere…

This and that… And then, suddenly,
he will go off marketing and tell us

"Why do you market your movie?"

He is the one who starts

and ends it.

Thereafter, he tells us,
"All of this is no use. "

"Don't do all this. " If it were up to me,
Sunny would stay in Juhu,

and I would be in Galaxy Apartments
for life.

-How would you market our show?
-I am…

I wonder what you think of me.

Now that we have called them.

This is our marketing.

Yeah. This is our marketing strategy.

-Twinkle in Kajol's eyes.
-Amazing!

-What?
-Twinkle in Kajol's eyes.

Oh!

-Wow!
-He is the genius,

and you've just fooled people
into thinking you are the genius.

He is the genius.

-Marketing genius is Salman Khan.
-Salman.

Absolutely.

Say it now.
"Twinkle-twinkle Little Stars. "

That's a nice one.

-My God!
-Good one.

-Good one.
-You asked me, but I had no idea.

You asked him, and he gave you
a couple of ideas right away.

-We should go to him.
-Kajol, this show is not a jhol.

He's on a roll, babe.

I know. He's a poet, and
he didn't even know it.

But we have been married for so long,

and we are now living
vicariously through you.

-Why?
-Because you are now living,

you know, this fresh lease of life.

Even at 60, you have romance in your life.

-So--
-Well…

You know, there are
two ways of looking at it.

You people haven't been through such
a traumatic break-up like I have.

I was very close to Reena.

I was very close to Kiran.

I mean, "was" is the wrong word.
I still am

very close to Reena and Kiran, both.

So when you are with
a person for such an

extended period of time,
like 16 years…

Reena and I grew up together.

-She was--
-Yeah, I know.

-You have seen Junaid as a baby.
-I know…

-Yeah.
-So when you go through something

which, you know,
doesn't work out, it is a hit.

And you have to recover from that.
It took me four years to recover.

You, people, haven't gone
through that.

-So, we have our own lives--
-Because of whom…

Because of whom
did it take so long?

I know their respective
husbands really well.

And their decision to get married

is a correct one.

It's because, had there
been anyone else in their life,

they would've been
in a similar state as you are.

-Well, some backhanded compliment…
-I am not in a bad condition.

-Like…
-Because…

Had it been like me.

It's because…

-Next.
-I have been lucky

that the two women I have been
married to are really wonderful.

Both Reena and Kiran
are really amazing people.

So, in that sense, though
we went through a breakup,

I think… I mean,
we are still family.

Reena, Kiran, and I are
still family. Very much.

-That's--
-Do you think love is easy

and marriage is very difficult?

Actually, when you
are committed to a relationship,

marriage is just about signing papers.

But if you are really
connected with the person, then

sometimes it is like marriage.

You know. Like Gauri and I,
today we are together.

We are very highly
committed to each other.

No, but I think it changes things.

You know, they say love is blind,
but marriage is like a magnifying glass.

You hold it up.
You see all the flaws.

And you even burn
the other person with sunlight.

I think it's also part of growing up.

It's part of learning things.
You realize things about yourself.

And what about you?
You decided to be this…

See, I'll tell you what happens

is when…

a partner grows more than the other,

that is when the differences
start coming in.

That is when the insecurities
start setting in.

So they both need to grow together.

And they both need to just

get off each other's backs.

This is the advice
that you would give him.

No. It's… I…

He never got married
and is now advising us.

-I believe that.
-He has seen it from the outside.

-Don't tell this to Ajay.
-Marriage is--

You had a couple of
deep relationships.

For almost seven to
nine years. It's as good as--

-Correct.
-It didn't work out.

If there is anyone
to be blamed, it's me.

Salman, I heard that
you once wanted to adopt a child.

-Is that true?
-No.

-Never?
-No.

I think it is pretty cool that you
decided that this is your path in life.

You know, a lot of people…
For women…

At least, they can say, "I don't
want to get pregnant. It is a pain. "

But for a man, it is so easy
to have children, and you

decided that this was not
what you wanted to do.

-You didn't want to take shortcuts.
-No…

Children I will have, one day. Soon.

-Really?
-Yeah.

When?

Whenever.

Next year? Next month?

Is there something
we don't know about?

No. Nothing. It's just that
eventually, one…

will have kids, but…

Let's see. God willing.

-So, do you think about legacy?
-And then…

And then there is a whole…
A village…

-A huge family to take care of…
-That's true.

The children. You know, there
are women in the family.

Now Alizeh has grown up.
Ayaan has grown up.

And… So now we have Aayat, you know.

By the time I have kids,
Aayat will be able to take care of them.

So this is a proper plan.
You are going to have a child.

Let's see. I am just saying that

I don't have any…

-No, I am trying to ask you--
-Averseness towards kids…

Do you ever think that it is about

a legacy taking forward?

Is it something that you want to do?
Yes, you want to be a parent.

-Or is it something that…
-Yeah.

"Yes. I would like to leave a…"

No. Leave what?
What have we done?

We go on shooting, do some average
and mediocre acting, and come home.

Our movies are either
a hit or a flop.

Later, if we bag a big movie,
we get back to work.

So it's not rocket science.
We did nothing amazing.

It is just the fans who

see something in us
and want to watch our movies.

So because of that, we are here.

He, I, and everyone are here
because of that.

It's not like we have
delivered great performances

or that we have great looks.

Or that we are working
magic on the screen. Not at all.

Nothing at all.

So no pressure from your
mom and dad to say that…

-"Listen, you need to think…"
-No…

-"…of the future generation. "
-There has never been any pressure

from Dad, Mom, or anybody to
get married or have children.

There's a little bit of everyone
wanting a piece of immortality.

You either do it through
having children or you do it

-by leaving some work behind.
-Yeah.

So he's trying to do both.

-You know. Children and work--
-Well, never thought of it.

-Did you not?
-"Leaving behind a legacy. "

Never thought of that.

Who created a legacy
in the first place? Who did it?

For me, I mean… When
Reena and I got married

and Junaid was born,
it was a magical thing.

Really magical.

Yeah. I remember…
We were doing shows at that time--

In '93…

We were doing shows
at that point in time, so…

-They were newly married husband--
-He was three months old…

Three months… So Junaid

for 45 days, was with me.

-Oh wow!
-Yeah.

At night, I used
to go and drop him…

-Don't exaggerate it.
-You also took care of Aarav.

-Yeah.
-Not for 45 days.

He would take him in
the pram and go on a walk.

-What nonsense.
-He said the woman has to recover

-Salman was looking after the baby.
-No, he was very fond of Junaid.

-And we were…
-I still am.

Yeah…

-And he was a good kid.
-Very good kid.

Very good kid. And I saw this…

-That ad he did…
-Outstanding…

-Did you see that? The ad--
-Yeah. We saw that.

We did a recreation of a scene
from Andaz Apna Apna.

Junaid and I.

-Oh! Wow!
-Yeah.

That's why people are asking when
you will do Andaz Apna Apna 2 .

That is something they have been asking
ever since Andaz Apna Apna

flopped.

Actually, people liked that movie
long after it was released.

-Exactly.
-It was released on Friday.

Saturday was a disaster.
On Sunday, it was taken off.

-And now it's a cult.
-Yeah.

Can you imagine?
And you keep saying that

you weren't there for your kids.
You didn't do enough.

But I saw you, even with Azad,

you'd come to Nitara's birthday parties.

There was no nanny.
It was just you.

You are very involved in
your daughter Ira's foundation.

-You are working with Junaid--
-"Ira"…

Ira's foundation.

You are working with Junaid
all the time.

So, do you think you are
being too hard on yourself?

No, I don't think I am hard
on myself. I feel that…

It's not that I was not
entirely there for my kids.

I've been there. But I feel that

in my headspace, I feel that
I should've been there more.

I think he's talking shit. Rubbish.

-Is it?
-If you don't work…

I told you the other day.

Sit at home and don't do any work.

Stay at home.
You have to run the house.

Or maybe you felt
you weren't that involved

in their lives, their minds,
their ambition…

-their dreams?
-Yeah. You see…

The thing is that I used to
be so involved in my work

and my relationships were
with the directors of the movies.

I would spend a lot
of time with Ashutosh…

Whoever was my director.

So if you ask me, at that time

"What is Ira's…"

When she was four or five years
old, when Junaid was of that age…

So if you would ask me what
Junaid's fears are, or Ira's dreams,

or what their insecurities are,
I would not know

because I had not invested that much.

-No. But that's also--
-I knew the insecurities,

dreams, desires, and
fears of my directors.

-You know…
-No, but--

So I had connected a lot more
with the people I was working with.

No, but…

-That's what I feel--
-He has said, "No, but" four times now.

So, "No, but" what?

I am only praising you.

Shut up and listen.

He felt bad that he didn't
spend enough time with his kids.

Kids usually get closer to their
mothers than their fathers. Okay?

It just happens.

-They get closer to the mother.
-It happens.

And they get closer to
the mother's family also.

Yes. But I feel like…

As a father, I feel I have spent
time with them.

It's not like I wasn't there.
I was there for them.

But when they have grown up also, that…

It becomes… They become
more like friends. You know…

-That's the ultimate relationship.
-I think it becomes…

Yeah. It becomes okay later.

So we've been lounging around
like it's a spa day.

Enough of talking.
Let's play a game.

-A game?
-Yes!

It is called "This Side That Side, "

where your opinions
have to be louder

and you have to take a stance.

Think of this game as
Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa .

But with more drama.

We throw out a prompt,
and you have to take a stand.

"Green light" means "Yes".

"Red light" means "No"
and no gray areas.

-Ready? Shall we?
-Oh, lovely!

-Come on…
-I am thinking of it as

Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham .

It's not that bad.

-So we are going to throw you a prompt--
-"It's not that bad. "

Not the movie!

-You don't get me into trouble.
-"It's not that bad. "

We'll throw you a prompt, and

if you agree with it, then
you go into the Green Light.

-Okay.
-And if you don't

-then you go into the Red Light.
-Okay.

And you can't stay in the middle.

Yeah. No gray areas here

like you and your life.

She insults people in an instant.

Not exactly. That insult
was out of affection.

"It's okay to lie
to protect someone you love. "

-Yes…
-"It's okay to lie to protect

someone you love. "

-No?
-You have to go in one.

You have to choose one.

Okay. He does not agree.

-Why?
-Depends on the lie.

If it is a white lie, it is fine.

But… If you lie blatantly,

and support somebody
who you love, who's wrong…

-Then I think it's not right.
-Actually, I want to go with this.

-No, I agree with this.
-I agree with that.

But there will be times
when I would lie to…

-For someone--
-I think it's better to have

your cards on the table.

Everyone should know exactly
what's happening.

It depends on who
you are lying to, right?

-Yes--
-The person you love.

-The person you love?
-Yeah.

No, I wouldn't lie
to the person I love.

-I am not lying.
-What is written?

-She is a liar.
-Only to protect…

-She is--
-It's okay to lie to protect

-someone you love.
-Yeah.

-I would say…
-Protect someone you love.

-Not to them--
-It depends.

After committing a murder--

-You should not lie.
-Yes.

But if… It also depends on
what the lie is.

-Exactly.
-So I am in the middle.

-What!
- Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa .

Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa .

-Yes, it depends on the situation.
-This is better.

-Yes. Come on…
-This is better.

-I would defend someone I love.
-He's very clear.

But if it is something like
a murder or something serious,

then I would not.

-Then I would not.
-So you must come here.

Go there.

-And…
-Now he goes away.

-Oh, my God!
-You know why he's gone there.

-Basically--
-1000% I will lie

to protect somebody I love.

-Come what may.
-Oh, my God! He put on this act

-of being a saint.
-And you fell for it.

-I felt that I…
-What about that?

Okay, I still don't think
I'd want to lie.

No, I am 50% convinced.
It depends on the situation.

-I don't think I belong in any place.
-Next.

-Middle.
-Okay. Come on. Next one.

"Fame usually corrupts people. "

"Fame usually corrupts people. "

I would say "yeah".

Again, he will go there.

-Just to be contrary--
-Let me think.

-You think a lot.
-See.

-We don't know whether he is--
-Now you people express your views.

Fame does corrupt people.

Sometimes, for the good,
they become better people,

and sometimes
they become worse people.

-Usually…
-And what happens with fame is

you have all these
sicko fans around you.

They just keep saying
"you are great", "you are the best. "

But it depends on that person.
That personality.

Depends on that individual

whether he lets that go to his head--

-Exactly. So usually.
-Usually…

With me, nothing has ever gone to my head.

-The question was not about you.
-It says, "usually".

-Usually. Generally…
-I will speak about myself.

You are not the center of the universe.

For me, I am.

And then he says
fame doesn't go to your head!

He thinks he's at the center of
the universe and fame doesn't…

-Please come back.
-This is my universe.

-And I live in Galaxy.
-Good one.

Yeah. But success

makes more failures
than failure itself.

Failure is like a wake-up call.
It makes us get up and work hard.

-We go back…
-Yeah.

…to that position.
But usually, if

fame and compliments go to your head,

you are screwed, bro.

Finished. The game is over.

So that should never go to your head.

-Okay. Come.
-We'll try.

Come on.

"Men gossip more than women. "

-No chance.
-Yes, I agree.

-I agree.
-No chance.

Again, you have come this side.

-"Men gossip more than women. "
-This side… I disagree.

-This is for disagreement.
-Yes. Disagreement.

No, but I completely think men
definitely gossip more than women.

-What?
-They do!

-They talk about everybody.
-They do!

They talk about
everybody and everything.

I don't know which men
you people are hanging out with.

Yes. That is correct.

-They are all your friends.
-They are your friends.

But it comes to us from the women.

It doesn't come to us from men.

Who are these women
you are hanging out with?

Can we ask you that?

Your hairdressers,
your stylists, and all these people.

The gossip goes from one
person to another and reaches us.

-As if you don't listen to it keenly.
-And the fact that it reaches

-someone like me--
-Are you deaf?

-And someone like Aamir…
-I don't get any gossip.

That… Everyone knows.

Do you know what happens to me?
I say, "I heard this gossip".

They say, "That happened ten years ago. "

-I can imagine that. For sure.
-I am the last person to know.

Okay.

-It's okay--
-But women gossip.

-More than men?
-Yeah.

-You people are saints.
-Get some milk

-and pour it on them.
-I never said we don't gossip.

-You asked who does it more.
-We narrate facts.

-Which you gossip…
-Okay. We are done.

"People in the industry pretend to like
each other more than they actually do. "

Of course.

-That's true.
-No.

-It's the business. Yeah.
-Yeah.

-It's true.
-I don't agree with this statement.

-I don't agree.
-I don't agree with this statement.

People in the business don't
pretend that they like you

just to get their
work done, and then

-they just disappear.
-But you always know…

-You always know when they don't like you.
-But that is in every field.

-You always know it is not genuine.
-It's not about--

So many people are
not such good actors.

I feel that… There are
people, of course, who

fake it and all that, but we
also understand that he is fake--

-Yeah. We stay away.
-We maintain distance.

You always know who wishes you well

-and doesn't wish you well.
-I meet Jaggu, Anil, you,

and Shah Rukh. We don't
fake our liking for each other.

-That's right.
-But it's not about who you meet.

There are people who pretend
that they like you more than they do.

-That happens everywhere.
-Perhaps, you have met those people.

-You just keep quiet. I have met you…
-Come on.

Okay. We are done.

How much do we walk?

Now, both of you should sit,
and we'll ask you questions.

Come, Salman. We'll ask them
questions. This is too much.

They have been questioning us
for a long time.

I have an interesting question
for you people.

Earlier, when we were talking,
you said you get inspired by me.

That you live vicariously through me
because I had a number of…

You know… Wives.

You sound like a Sheikh.

-This question…
-A Sheikh…

-He's already tired of asking.
-No…

The question is yet to come.

Why do you want to live
vicariously through me?

-Hey…
-We are just looking at it.

-Just window shopping.
-No. Answer properly.

-Where did you get this thought from?
-I will tell you.

Our life is more like junk now.

So we are living through you

and looking at what is fresh.

-Akshay--
-We are admiring your…

-Akshay.
-We are admiring your whole array.

-Your versatility. Your turn.
-Okay. Your turn.

-How did this pair come to be?
-I was doing a chat show.

And that channel shut down.
I interviewed her.

And I think someone saw us and said

we have good chemistry.
Five years later,

we are both here on this couch.

So I guess that's how it happened.

Match made in heaven, basically.

I am glad this turned out.

I think the devil made this match.

-Prime made this match.
-With you both on the show,

the energy level will be good.

Actually, we realized that
we have many things in common.

-Common. Yes.
-Surprisingly.

-Like what?
-Everything. We actually

-say the same things…
-Both are rude!

-What! Rude?
-Of course.

How are we disrespectful?
Through this show.

-we've only been kind.
-We are independent.

We are quite decent.

We are good mothers.

-We are working women
-Both want to live vicariously through me.

Yes. That is our greatness.

We are not going to do it.
We are living it through you.

-See.
-Thank God nobody wants to live my life.

No.

Okay. In real life, both of you
have been on platforms

that are very emotional. You both have

let people see your softer side.

You know how vulnerable
both of you are.

-How did that change come about?
-I have always been like this.

-I cry very easily.
-You cry.

I have always been someone who cries.
-He cries.

-You have also become too emotional.
-Yes, I do cry easily.

-No. You know, if…
-Like I laugh, I cry.

If we are talking about happy moments…

If we are talking about
happy moments, then that is when

we get tears of joy.

But if at all,

it is some kind of stuff
that you have gone through,

I never cry at that.

That is your business.
That is your thing.

You need to fight that.
You cannot put that out.

But if you are talking about,
say, for example,

a co-star who has helped you.
A friend who has helped you.

At a time when
you did not have anything.

-So those moments, you know, just…
-The good stuff.

Jus-- Yeah. It just makes
you feel good about that.

I have known these guys
for 40 years now.

Have you ever cried in public?

Made people cry in public?

-She has made people cry.
-She has made people cry.

I have made people cry. No. I think
my defense mechanism kicks in.

I would rather people think that I am
stupid than a damsel in distress.

It doesn't work for me.

Have you cried?

I have got tears
in my eyes once or twice.

-But--
-I am very comfortable crying.

I don't feel it shows…
It's not a sign of weakness for me.

-No, I think it is a great thing.
-It is…

-A sign of strength.
-It's so strange, we are sitting here,

and the guys don't have an issue with

-crying.
-Crying.

We both are like, "No.
We don't want to cry in public. "

No, but I think, with you guys
being open about your emotions

and crying, you are opening
the door for so many men out there

who, perhaps, were scared
to express themselves.

If they see their heroes doing it,

it automatically enables them.

So I think that's…

But, I mean, cry for the right reasons.
Why cry for no rhyme or reason?

Not for no rhyme or reason.

Since childhood, we have been told

-"Boys shouldn't cry. "
-"Kids should not cry. "

-Yes. "Boys don't cry. "
-Now they see grown-up men

crying.

But crying for like…

Again, he is playing that same game

-where he'll just disagree.
-No.

-Now he's just disagreeing for no reason.
-Crying for your brother, sister,

mother, father, family…

But going and crying for

a girlfriend who has left you.

Then that is…

a bit too much.

But now, at this age, who is
crying for a girlfriend who has left?

This is what we are talking about.
The younger generation.

Move on. Next.

-Next?
-Next.

-Okay. All right.
-Next.

-Swipe. That's it.
-Follow Aamir.

"Follow Aamir. "

-You people found a punching bag today.
-I didn't say that. He did.

You are punching me…

-Him!
-Not just him…

-As if you people are saints.
-Of course, we are saints.

We have been very gracious.
Can't you see?

Yeah, but he has gone
through a very rough phase.

He has taken all of it on himself.

But even you have gone
through a very rough phase.

Your entire physical health

-and what's been happening around you.
-Physical health is good now.

-Okay. I am glad.
-I had trigeminal neuralgia.

Which was taken care of
at that point in time.

Now the aneurysm is there. Then,
an arteriovenous malformation is present.

But you've got to live with it.
There are a lot of people

living with bypass surgeries,
heart conditions, and many more.

So, I mean…

You have been talking
a lot about your mental health.

-What did you say?
-When I had that trigeminal neuralgia

which was taken care of.

That pain used to be…
You would not want your

-biggest enemy to have that pain.
-Yes.

-It's really bad.
-I had it for seven and a half years.

I would talk like this…

-Oh no…
-Oh shit!

This used to happen

-every four to five minutes.
-Damn!

Oh my God.

-Yeah, me from then…
-It's a terrible pain.

Anything. Suddenly, while
talking… It used to take me about

an hour and a half

to have my breakfast, and I used
to go straight to dinner.

For an omelet, it used to
take me… Because I couldn't…

-Couldn't chew.
-Force myself.

Hurt it. Means like as much pain…

So I could get rid of it and then

I used to be on some 750 mg of…

painkillers and even that wouldn't help.

And then when they realized
I had it. They thought it was dental.

When they realized, I was asked
when this pain would go away.

I said that when it reduces a bit
and keeps on coming back at

longer intervals of time,

when I have a drink or two.

That is when they realized
it is about a nerve.

-Okay.
-And it used to be like… Aamir.

The first time, I think
I was doing Partner .

Lara was there.

-And… Yes.
-From that time?

A hair strand came here,
and she did this, and I was…

Oh shit.

-Oh God!
-And I realized…

"Wow, Lara! Electrifying!"

That is when it started,

I mean, I used to be like…

you know…

Okay…

Oh…

-Oh God!
-Oh…

You are okay now?

-Absolutely…
-That pain is gone.

That pain is gone.
It is the worst pain.

It's called "The Suicidal Disease".

The maximum number of suicides are
committed by patients of this disease.

-You can't handle the pain.
-People out here didn't know about it.

So when… I also spoke about it
because a lot of people have it.

A lot of people have it.

And now it is very easily treatable.

It's a Gamma Knife Surgery.

They fix screws to your face
for almost eight hours.

They make you lie down
and with the gamma knife…

-You underwent this surgery.
-Yeah. Eight and a half hours.

When I came out, they said,
"Your pain

will go about 20 to
30 percent". I said…

-Whatever.
-I agreed. But then

-it just went. Completely.
-Completely?

Touch-wood.

Completely gone.

You've been talking about mental health.

He's been having physical health issues.

-You've been talking about--
-Physically, all is fine.

As of now, you are. Agreed.

Boss.

You've been talking
about mental health, and

because of you, a lot of
conversations have opened up.

Even your daughter has been

talking about this.

When did you first go to a therapist?

When I went to a therapist

for the first time… It was
more of counseling.

It was when Reena and I were
going through our separation

and divorce, so we were
jointly doing counseling.

That was the first time. Year 2002.

Then I had a gap.
You know, then I had a long gap.

-Four years back, I started therapy.
-You could've come to me.

But that is the best thing.
To go to a friend.

-Yeah.
-That is right.

So, he… I mean, he takes away
more than half of your

-pain and he gives you…
-You share it.

We do it with everyone.
We share with friends and family.

But a therapist makes you realize
what it is that you are doing wrong.

-Exactly.
-How are you seeing things wrongly?

And you get to correct yourself.
You get to improve yourself.

That's the main thing.
That's what I felt.

I mean, we are all carrying baggage.

And like in any airline counter,

the heavier the baggage,
the greater the penalty you have to pay.

A good therapist helps you
downsize your baggage,

and you can probably
make it small enough

to stow in some overhead compartment

of our lives.

But I mean, the baggage
that you are carrying,

why would you want to
carry that baggage?

Even if you go on a hike,

-you have your sack or your--
-Unintended baggage.

-Yeah. Rug sack…
-Nobody wants to.

You are carrying it for a bit, and then

you clip it off and put it down.

-But everyone can't do that.
-Leave it in the past.

If you can do it,
that's fantastic.

And you are clearly able to do it.

-But everyone can't--
-Don't go into the past.

Present. Be in the present.
That will make your future.

That is what it is.
I totally believe in that.

That baggage could possibly
belong to someone else, also.

Let that person carry his baggage.

Why should we carry somebody
else's baggage?

"Passengers are…" What is that?

"…responsible for their luggage. "

You have a point of view, but
I think going to a therapist is like

-going to any doctor.
-It helped me a lot…

It's a good thing
if the therapist is good.

Exactly. You have
to find the right one.

Like how you find the right doctor.

One of the reasons
we decided to do this show

was because we saw that a lot of

male hosts ask questions, and they don't

ever bring up the sort of questions
that women really want to ask

you guys.

And we also ask
these questions at home.

We are collating answers.

We haven't got a concrete one yet.

So we are asking you guys.

-Don't get too scared.
-No.

-It's a healthy discussion.
-Yeah. Ask away.

Ask anything. Brace yourself, bro.

You need to take over now.

So, when the hero
romances a younger woman,

it's called cinema magic. But

when an older heroine
romances a younger man,

it's called bold.

Why do you think that is?

Actually, for me, when I am
doing a movie, I'd like to…

The casting should be done based on

the requirement.

So sometimes there is a requirement
where there is an age difference

between the two actors.
It could be, in Dil Chahta Hai

-Akshaye and Dimple.
-Yeah.

So it really depends…
For me, it depends on the story.

But in your movies,
you have always had these…

Have I done movies with very
young heroines? I don't know.

-Sometimes you have.
-You have.

Bebo.

But did Bebo and I not look
like we were together, I mean…

The same age?

You did not, I did.

No, I don't think it is about looking.
It's about the actual age gap.

When it doesn't--

Filmmaking is not real.
You have to understand that.

Will you actually die in a death scene?

No, it's not that, but--

-It has to look right.
-It's never the other way.

It's never like, you know… By the time

you are 40 or 50, you are
playing the hero's mother.

So there is definitely a difference.

No, look. Depending, like there is…

Sridevi. If she'd have kept on working,
she could've still done. Madhuri…

can still play if there's a role.
If there is a younger girl…

An upcoming star or a star
that the producer or director says

"I want to cast her. "

Okay? Now we have
done so much work

that the pairing looks old.
So, to bring in freshness

in a movie. So that's
when you take up, you know,

somebody else who you have
not worked with that much.

I believe… I mean,
this is what my thing is.

It doesn't work in the opposite way,
though.

But how many such scripts
do you people come across?

But I don't think that movie is good,

and the story is really woven around

something like that…
An older woman and a younger man.

I don't think anyone would mind that.

It's clearly a man's world.

What do you think a woman has to do

-to succeed in this world?
-In the kitchen,

-we were pushed.
-When were you pushed into the kitchen?

We were pushed into the kitchen.

The chef in every hotel
and house is a man.

But he's getting paid for it.

-Hey…
-Yes.

But the chef gets paid for it, and at
home, if you cook, you get nothing.

Yes, so are you both
cooking at home?

How is it not a male-dominated society?

There are two males in your house

whom you have dominated.

Ours is a different scenario.

That's not the case
with the rest of the world.

-Right…
-I feel that

you know, in our society,
we don't treat human beings

-irrespective of their, you know…
-Gender.

Sexual orientation or their gender.

But I have to say one thing.

Actually, in Salman's movies,
there is some sort of equality

because Salman shows more
cleavage and legs than the heroine.

So there is equality.

I have told the heroines
to change and come back.

-"Go and wear trousers. "
-Yes…

Because I'll tell you what happens.

Because, I mean…
This is how our culture is.

Now you are watching a movie
with your parents and grandparents.

When you happen to see such
scenes, you do feel awkward.

And… They are awkward
with themselves.

And I believe that
if you want people to come in

their 20s and 30s, then
that thing should be there.

People should not feel awkward with
the kind of movies you are doing.

-He does the same thing.
-He has given a good answer,

but the real answer is that he wants
people only to see his chest,

and no one else should
be distracted from him.

-He doesn't--
-That's also correct.

-That's also correct.
-He's at the center of his universe.

No. See, because I'll tell you…

If at this age,
I am looking like that. Okay?

-"I deserve to be looked at. "
-You deserve it.

No. It will get people

younger than me, who
are not looking like that. Okay?

To start looking like that.

It just gives them that motivation.

Both of you have done this

losing weight, putting on weight…

Do you all have like separate wardrobes?

Like a wardrobe for when you are fat
and one for when you are thin?

Or anything like that? We have!

-We have.
-I do. I have my fat jeans.

-She has her fat jeans.
-He has one kurta.

-That's it.
-I have medium and large.

-Yes.
-And extra-large.

-You also have extra-large.
-Yes. Three sizes.

-I have three…
-So do we.

All the costumes we have on the set

are in sizes medium,
large, and extra-large.

-Depending on your mood that day.
-Depending on the night.

-Of the previous day.
-Previous day…

-Depending on the previous night.
-But sometimes, you know

I have so many injuries,
I can't work out.

You can't keep at it.

So, because of that,
you need that slide, but…

Once you are in a movie, then

you are quite okay
with that same costume.

But before the movie,
you are extra large,

then large, and by the time
we get to the climax,

I get to medium.

In the climax, I have
to take my shirt off. So…

all that.

We are not going to ask you
to remove your shirt today.

-Don't worry.
-No. But we have to do one thing.

He doesn't have to remove his shirt,
but this fellow has to sing for us.

I believe you do classical singing.

I am learning to sing.
It is something I love.

-Please…
-I am not a very good singer.

-Salman sings well.
-No, I don't…

Okay. You go first,
and then Salman will.

I heard your songs.
You played the recording.

Recording is a different story.

-That recording--
-It is auto-tune.

A lot of work has been done on it.

I sing for five minutes and leave.

The technicians need
two weeks to polish it.

Okay, please sing a little bit for us.

-What do you want me to sing? I'll sing.
-What do you sing?

Happy-go-lucky chaps on
Their way to make it big in life

Smart chaps pretending to be naive

-Something like that?
-Yes.

They wish to meet a damsel

And steal her heart

Her heart

Smart chaps

-Awesome.
-Very good. Okay.

-Sheer guts.
-Sing an old one.

-Which one?
-Old one.

My dreams have been left shattered

In the very eyes that cherished them

May you also yearn to be with someone

Anamika, may you also long for love

-Wow!
-Wow.

My dreams have been left shattered

Your turn.

-Your turn. You have to sing.
-Little bit. Something.

When the day comes to a gradual end

When the dusk secretly

Sneaks into the horizon

Wow.

My feelings…
He sings well.

Since we have had
so much fun here,

-we have to play a game.
-Now let's go fishing.

-No baits, no boats, no tags.
-Fishing?

That could make or break your ego.

We all get limited time to
catch as many fish as we can.

And then we have to defend our tags

like our reputation depends on it.

-Absolutely.
-Because it does. Well…

Let's get ready for "Oppo Game On".

Come on. Hurry.

-Convincing you people is tough.
-Whoever gets the most fish wins.

Okay. The timer begins now.

Okay.

Hey, how does this work?

-Like this.
-Oh…

-I caught two at once.
-What are you saying, Aamir?

-Hey…
-Hey!

-Cheater!
-Hey!

Hey, Twinkle! Stop it!

-Cheaters always prosper.
-No, they don't!

Time's up.

I pulled your rod also.

-Let's begin.
-Salman will start.

He's an expert at catching fish.

And there is always one more
in the sea for him.

"PhD in Intimidation. "
Yes. I think it applies to him.

"PhD in Intimidation. "

Yeah. So you earned that fish.

-You have earned that fish.
-No, what do you feel?

I feel that intimidation
is something

-I pay a huge price for.
-What do you mean?

For instance, my walk.

-Yeah…
-This is my walk.

This is my walk.

Wherever I go,
they say I have an “attitude”

That nothing matters to me
and all that. Then…

-It creates a perception…
-You are not such a person.

-I am…
-You don't intimidate anyone?

Wow!

-It happens.
-Everyone is scared of him.

It also happens like…
I mean…

Since childhood…

"Hey, sweet kid".
They ruffle my hair

and all that… So in order
to keep that away

-I must carry an expression.
-"Stay away from me. "

Yes. That is it.

"Tantrum king or queen. " I don't
think I am a tantrum king or queen.

You threw a tantrum, saying
that he comes late for work

-and you'll never work with him again.
-I never threw a tantrum.

I told a fact.

I told a fact.
That was not a tantrum.

I didn't say, "He is late. I am leaving
the shoot. " That would be a tantrum.

Do you think he deserves this "Tantrum"?

-No, I think no.
-He used to

stay back, while I would come
late and still be done with my work.

"One more take. "

He would get the perfect shot
after 38 takes.

-Most of the time.
-This is not possible.

-What does it read?
-"Falls in love every second day. "

-No.
-No, you don't deserve this fish.

-Throw it out.
-"Ridiculously charming. "

-I don't think it applies to me.
-I think you are very charming.

-What nonsense! No…
-I think you are very charming.

-Isn't he charming?
-I think you are charming

-but maybe not ridiculously.
-Yes, but charming.

"You are slightly charming.
Nothing much. "

-So not ridiculously charming.
-You are charming.

No, people like Aamir.

-Yes…
-No effort. No effort made.

They like Aamir.

-What did you get?
-"Innocent but looks mischievous. "

No, that's not you.

-This is not your face.
-Let go of it.

You are mischievous but look innocent.

You are exactly the opposite of that.

Mine is "Don't mess with me".

-I agree.
-Correct…

-It's absolutely correct.
-You all are agreeing a bit too much.

Nobody can dare to mess with you.

Take this home and
put it under your pillow.

Then your husband won't mess with you.

Nobody would dare. Next.

-"Use at least five curse words…"
-"Curse words. "

-"Per hour. "
-Agreed.

Agreed.

You don't want to start here.
Not starting from here, right?

But the curse words
are never aimed at somebody else.

-Never ever.
-Never onto somebody else.

Always onto me.

Like "I got screwed. "

You know, "I did this, I did that. "

-Never curse others.
-Never curse others.

Have you noticed that he has
defended himself over everything?

No matter what he does,
he is very innocent.

-It is a fact.
-It is a fact that he's a good man.

-Why…
-Shut up!

When did you hear me
cursing someone?

The curse words are always on me.

"I am in trouble".
I am never like, "You…"

You know that sounds so wrong.
Let's stop right there.

-That is better.
-I'm just saying…

-I got the same.
-"Mischievous but looks innocent. "

-I agree.
-Yes.

-He is that.
-100%.

-You are mischievous.
-No two ways about it.

-100%.
-Fully.

Stop this nonsense.

You deserve this fish.

Put it back in your basket.
Defend it.

I am not mischievous.

-Mischievous…
-I am the most innocent person

in the entire industry.

-Oh my…
-That person is right next to you.

"Takes a week to reply to a text. "

No. That's you.

-I'll take this fish.
-Please do.

Take this. This is yours.

"Emotional king. "
This is what I got.

Yes, I am emotional.

-"Emotional king". Absolutely.
-You are also emotional.

-Yes.
-Then keep it.

Take your fish.

"Technologically challenged. "
That is very true.

I am technologically challenged.
I can't turn on a TV.

Because there is somebody
or the other to turn it on.

So that is the reason why
you have not bothered to do this.

I'll tell you a story.

In 1996, Shah Rukh
and I went to shows.

-He bought a laptop for himself.
-He is very…

-Technologically, he is ahead.
-Quite ahead.

He said it is the latest laptop.
I can do this and that using it.

I hadn't used a laptop
in my life. I said…

"If you are so excited about it,
buy one for me also. "

Poor guy bought one for me.
We came back.

I kept the laptop
in a drawer and forgot.

Five years later, my manager asked,
"Sir, can I use your laptop?"

I said, "All right, I don't use it. "

It just didn't turn on.

It stayed shut for five years.
It didn't turn on.

-You kept a laptop in your drawer.
-I don't use one.

-"Bully No. One”, I am not.
-This is yours.

-No! I am not a bully.
-You can keep it.

-No, I am not a bully.
-You can keep it.

Salman is not saying anything.

-Salman, is she a bully or not?
-No…

-I am not a bully.
-Not at all.

-Not at all and…
-Not a bully…

And neither am I any of these.
"Flirts their way out of trouble. "

-No…
-That is 100% you.

-"Photographic Memory. "
-Memory? Yes.

Memory…

"Can't keep a secret. " No!

-I have 12.
-Liar!

-Liar…
-I think Salman has won.

-He has many fish…
-There are six.

Seven.

-Salman has won.
-Salman has won.

-Okay, fine. Let's give him--
-No, Tina. You won.

She has 12.

I will take this hamper.
Thank you very much.

-Twelve fish.
-Why is she getting the hamper?

-No, Salman caught the maximum fish.
-No…

I am taking the hamper. I deserve it.

And I deserve it for bearing the
two of you and her cackling in my ear.

-Nonsense.
-It's all mine.

How many episodes
will you be doing?

-Why? Want to come back?
-No, I am asking. How many episodes?

-Eight.
-Eight. Congratulations.

-Why?
-Congratulations.

-Are you congratulating--
-Do watch this show.

All the episodes of it. Do watch it.

-Hey…
-You are so mean.

Cut this out. We don't want all this.

But since we are all here,

let's commemorate this moment with
an expression that says

-Today was too much!
-Too much!

-One minute. You come here.
-Why?

We are taking a photo, right?

Even here, he wants perfection.

-I thought it was a photo.
-No. We are just doing the expression.

-Oh! What is the expression?
-Okay.

-Whatever. Today was too much fun.
-Today was too much fun.

What expression is that?

What was that? "Peace, Brother. "

I just have three expressions.

One is a smile, the other is this…

Where shall I get more expressions from?

Okay. Again.

Today was too much…

-Thank you so much.
-Thank you, guys.

-Thank you for doing this.
-Bye. See you.

-Bye. See you.
-Again…

Bye.

Let's go.

-Not bad at all.
-You're great with your answers.

I need to learn from you.

No. One must tell the truth. Why lie?

-Alright. We did quite well.
-Yes…

-Okay.
-This was too much.

-Yeah. It really was.
-Come on, let's go home.

-Let's go home. That way?
-This way…

Here's a very annoying…

But admiring…

Varun Dhawan and Alia Bhatt.

It's not a big deal.

Not a big deal, dude.

Oh, no!

It's fine to fall for someone

your friend dated in the past.

I think, VD, you should quickly
come and stand here.

-Why? I have not dated any friend's…
-Because you're being very hypocritical.

Come and stand here right now!

You are killing it on this show!