Original subtitles

an angry ex, and blinding veneers.

Some of the tans you see might be fake,

but these people are all real,

although some of what they do

has had a little nip and tuck purely for your entertainment.

Previously on the Only Way is Vegas.

- We all know that Lauren and Mario have had sex.

- Yeah, basically. - Are you really sure?

- 100%.

- But I still love him and I don't know why.

- Why am I in the wrong for storming off

while you're on the stage with a Chippendale?

- I've slept with another guy.

- All right, I've slept with near on 20 girls.

- What?

- We ended up kissing.

She ended up staying round mine.

- Let me tell you straightaway,

she's been saying round mine.

- You told me you didn't go back to his, Sam.

You lied again.

- Hey Joey, should we leave?

[energetic dance music]

[bright acoustic music]

- [Billie] Slightly different weather to Vegas.

- [Sam] Ooh, it's freezing!

- Don't you think coming back to work

feels like first day of school again?

- I know, doesn't it?

Had such an amazing time out there though.

We seriously need to get back onto the diet.

- It's Ferne's first day at work today, isn't it?

- Oh yeah, I wonder how she is getting on?

Would she be there yet?

- No. - What's the time?

- Half nine, should I give her a call?

- Yeah, give her a call.

Bet she's got holiday blues as well.

[phone ringing]

- Oh god.

[phone ringing]

- Hello? - Hello, darling.

- Hello, how are you?

- It's so miserable outside, proper misso day.

I'm just walking in to my new job.

- How you feeling?

- I feel all right, obviously just a bit upset

about the whole Charlie and Jasmin thing.

- It's pathetic.

- He has well and truly made his bed,

and now he's got to lay in it,

but listen I've got to go,

have a good day in the shop.

I've got to run into the salon.

- Cheers, see you later! - Cheers, bye!

- Bye!

- It's just so embarrassing.

If that was my ex-boyfriend, I would cringe.

- Same. - Massively.

- You know what?

It feels strange obviously, being away nearly 10 years now,

and a part of me feels like nothing's changed.

- You must feel homely.

You've got them slippers on. - Yeah, I do.

- [Carol] You've found a pair of slippers already.

- That's it, put my feet under.

- Anyway, what happened in Vegas?

- Obviously Jess had a couple of problems with Ricky,

so I think she needed me as well out there so.

- [Carol] What happened?

- It's the same thing, Carol. - No, no.

- I think he's very young.

She wants to wait around for him,

and I think it's a bad decision.

End of the day, he's had the situation

where he has cheated on her and what not,

and I don't think there is ever going to be trust there.

She thinks it is, but you know the old saying,

once a cheat, always a cheat,

I don't see it working,

and I don't want to see her waste too much time.

- Hello. - You all right, Jess?

- You alright lodger?

[Elliott laughs]

You not gone home yet? - No, I'm here.

- No, we cant get rid of him.

Look, Mommy's doing his ironing.

- So, Elliott and Sam had a bit of a snog in Vegas.

- Stop it! - It was a kiss, yeah.

- Kiss or a snog? - Can't really remember.

- Was it over night? - No, just a snog.

- Come on Pat, we had a kiss and a chat.

- A kiss and a chat? - Yeah.

- [Carol] Oh God, here we go.

- Well, that's the first time I've heard that called that.

[laughing]

- So I better go get my hair done then,

if we're all going out tonight.

- It's only going for a drink.

It's casual, don't drive yourself mad.

- Where you going, for a catch up?

- Like a little celebratory drink.

- It's because I'm coming back so I just,

I wanted to have a drink cause obviously,

'cause I'm coming back and I'm coming back to Essex,

so I'm entitled to have

a little drink, aren't I? - Oh, stop it.

[phone ringing]

- Hello?

Yeah, okay, all right, I'll speak to you in a bit.

I'll ring you back, bye!

- [Carol] Who was that?

- Ricky, he wants me to go to his.

Why when I said about Ricky, everyone's gone quiet?

- I don't know. - It's really annoying.

[energetic dance music]

- Still beatin' ya! - No you're not.

- Oh, you joker.

- What's happening? - You all right?

- How you doing Mario?

Nice to see ya.

- Oh, Vegas was sick, weren't it?

- I heard about you and Popie in Vegas together.

[laughing]

- Straight in. - What happened?

Did you do what I think you did?

- We had a kiss, that was it.

Everyone, Lucy seems to think we slept together.

I wish we'd slept together, we didn't sleep together.

- Did you not sleep? - No.

It's a weird one because I don't really know what to do.

- Yeah.

- Well, I'm seeing them tonight.

I'm seeing her, Chloe, and Charlie

for dinner tonight, so we'll see.

- Are ya? - It's probably nice.

Like its probably nice to have to have Popie

to take your mind off the Lucy stuff.

- Yeah.

- In Vegas was the first time in what?

Since me and Lucy broke up,

that I have actually seen her kiss someone else,

and that actually hurt, that hurt so much because--

- It's horrible.

- Even me and Lauren,

I didn't kiss her in front of Lucy.

That was just done on a drunken night that was an impulse,

literally done, that was it, one little kiss.

With her, she looked at me on the dance floor,

saw Tom, literally saw me look at her,

then just turned around and kissed Tom.

- Yeah, but she's obviously tried to do it to hurt you.

- Yeah, but it really hurt.

- It must've been horrible, mate.

- What's happening with you and the American girl?

- She was fit, wasn't she?

[laughing]

It was more a holiday romance more than anything,

because I obviously don't think I'm really,

I probably might see her in the future,

but that's all right, I ain't seen a girl in how long?

- Yeah exactly. - Since I split up with Sam.

- She must have been gutted though, Joey having to see that.

- She probably was,

but she's done it a few times in front of me, ain't she?

Like with all the other boys and that.

- Yeah, I think it wasn't nice on Joey hearing about Elliott

so it cant be one rule for one, one rule for another.

- I'm glad.

Do you know what it is, anywhere in the world,

nine times out of 10 you probably would say

boys are sort of a lot more worse,

stereotypically worse than girls, in Essex,

the girls are just as bad as the boys, if not worse!

- I know.

[laughing]

- I'm excited to see everyone tonight,

and then obviously, Mario's coming, love of your lives.

- Oh! [laughing]

- [Lauren] Oh, we're going to have to fight over him Char.

- Don't get in this love triangle.

- I think he really likes Pops, and I think,

Pops likes him back. - I think so as well.

- But I think they've got too much pride.

- They're both, yeah.

Listen Pops, chill out!

- We're good friends, it's like that, you know?

Do you risk it or do you not?

- Anyway Char. - Here we go.

- You're sitting there all laid back 20 women, naked photo,

Jasmin, Ferne, like are you trying to humiliate me?

[laughing]

- The thing with Jasmin,

she was someone to get me through the hard times,

you know what I mean?

- I think that you're 21,

and you're gonna go and do all this madness,

and I cant even give you advice,

because I tried that with Joey and it didn't work.

You gotta make your own mistakes.

You need to talk to Ferne, Char.

- There's been times where

I wanna really get back with her, you know?

And there's times when I think to myself,

I cant do this anymore.

I don't know where we are.

- [Customer] I definitely like this colour.

- Yeah, try that one.

- Girls! - Hello.

- Oh my god! - What is that?

- It's my detox drink.

- Are you going to eat as well?

Just, just...

- Well, I'm thinking juice for two days.

- [Sam] Yeah?

- And then start eating again.

- Then indulging again in blueberry pancakes!

- Yeah.

[laughing]

How's Tom?

- He's good, yeah he's good.

He sent me flowers this morning.

- [Both] Did he?

- It's so cute. - How nice.

- They're really cute.

- What did he put in the little note?

- Oh my god! [laughs]

- It's all right. - She hysterical.

- No, he just put, "A little something

"to brighten up your day, see you later, Tom."

- [Both] Why is that so funny?

- I just thought, for a boy to sit there

and write "something to brighten up your day."

- So, you've got a boyfriend,

yous two are married off. - No, I haven't!

Do you know what though,

we have seen each other like, everyday.

- That's good though. - Have you?

- Yeah, It might be a bit awkward now though.

- [Both] Why?

- Because he's Joey's best mate.

- Oh, don't worry about that.

Oh, it's all right, me and Joey.

- [Lucy] You're all right now?

- Yeah, we're not on bad terms.

I think to be honest, like what he done with that girl

in Vegas when she actually walked over.

- I cant believe that!

- I think it was spiteful doing that.

I think he was just trying to get revenge

on the whole Elliott thing, but you know,

I don't know, that's obviously his style,

and that's how he wants to play it, then fine.

- But you didn't, you didn't shove Elliott in his face.

- No, exactly, like, I didn't at all.

- What about Elliott, have you seen him?

- Texting a little bit, but were going out tonight,

'cause he's back from Spain now,

like, officially for the winter,

so he's doing, like, home drinks with us lot.

Arg, are gonna come, aren't you?

- Yeah. - What about you?

What are you up to tonight?

- Tom's taking me for dinner.

- Aww. - Really, where you going?

- I don't know, it's a surprise.

- Is it? - Nice!

- I aint gonna lie, mate, you look terrible.

- I didn't get to go to Vegas, did I?

So I ain't got a tan, I ain't had good times.

I've been on a downer.

A elbow, accidental elbow to the face in a football match.

- You missed out though in Vegas, big time.

- Why, what happened? - What didn't happen, mate?

- Public sex acts

in the back of a limo seems a little bit scumbaggy.

It seems a bit something I would do.

Did you cuddle up afterwards, did ya?

By the champagne glasses and the TV in the back?

- No, actually--

- Did the driver go, "Are you finished yet?

"Do you want me to drop you off?"

And then I put the little screen up, the privacy screen.

- Can they see through that thing?

- [Diags] If they want, probably.

- Because we told him to do it up.

- Well, he knows what going on, doesn't he?

He's not an idiot.

Have you been speaking to her a lot like?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I took her for a Chinese the other night.

- What?

- And I think I'm taking her out later as well.

- Again?

Oh, we just went for a Chinese together.

We got on so well me and her are so close now.

Me and Lucy are like, oh, we're both so good looking

and chiselled with fucking perfect bodies, shut up!

[laughing]

- Yeah, we get on well, mate, I like her, but...

- [Diags] But what?

- She's got so much history with Mario and that.

I need to make sure that that's definitely over.

- Ferne. - Darling.

- All right babes. - You all right?

How are you?

- Just popping in for a quick appointment,

so I've only got a couple of seconds.

- Yeah, I'm good, you? - So how's your first day?

- Its nice, I just I just kind of like,

as soon as I got back from Vegas,

it was nice just to get back,

and just get straight into work and just keep busy.

- What's happened since?

- Obviously, it's been so hard.

It was so difficult been out there with him at the same time

and then obviously, I got the chance to speak to him,

and that kind of completely went tits up.

- I think the reason you acted like that in Vegas

is because you almost felt out of control.

The ball was in Charlie's court.

I still cant get my head around it.

He's got the cheek to turn around

and say to your ex girlfriend,

"I've cheated on you 20 times."

It's just unnecessary, like what's he got?

- It's like he doesn't like you, Ferne.

The thing is Ferne, like,

I'm gonna to give it to you straight.

All the droning on about it,

and talking about it in the world

isn't gonna take back what he did to you.

- Like with Charlie, I was completely myself.

We got through that farting stage, wear no make up stage

where you could be your total self.

- That's when it all goes wrong though.

You should never fart in front of a man, Ferne.

- Well, that's where I went wrong.

I farted and he cheated on me.

[laughing]

- But once someone cheats once, the insecurities are there.

You'll always be questioning yourself,

was the other girl better than me?

Did she look better than me?

Was she better in bed than me?

- When you got 20 to compare yourself to,

I mean, it's too much, ain't it?

- [Gemma] Too much, yeah.

- Gem, you're gonna be well disappointed in me.

- Don't tell me you went and slept with him, Ferne.

- Ugh.

- So after he told you he slept with 20 girls,

you go back to his room and sleep with him?

- Yeah, really. [laughs]

- I cant be listening to this and wasting my time.

Well, you're off your head!

[energetic rock music]

- Right, seeing as you couldn't come to Las Vegas,

and you probably missed out

on the best holiday of your life.

- Ever!

- We've brought you here, right, to make up for it.

Are you ready?

- [All] Ta-da!

- What are you saying? - God, I thought you joking.

- Welcome to Bas Vegas, Essex. - You're in Bas Vegas, baby!

- Come on! - You not a little bit happy?

- No, it's good. - You not a little bit happy?

- No, I'm happy. - Diags, don't be ungrateful.

- No I'm not ungrateful.

It's just you all went to Las Vegas,

and I'm in Bas Vegas ain't I, so what?

- 80 minutes, mate. - Well, then just be like--

- I'm happy, no, I'm happy.

I'm so glad I'm here.

- Right, are you going to enjoy Bas Vegas

and give it your all?

- Yeah, I am. - All right, let's go.

- Okay, tell you what. - Hold your sign.

Hold your sign. - Bas Vegas, yes!

- We'll all give you 50p each, so you can do a few bets.

[laughing]

- How do we get in? - Bas Vegas!

- Bella, whats he doing to us, horrible daddy?

- Right. - Oh my god.

- Look, you look just like your mother

when she gets out of the shower, hey?

Yes, my little soldier.

- You're so soppy around your dog.

I was with my mum and that earlier, Elliott was around.

He's pretty much staying

at our house until he gets somewhere

- He's moved in, has he? - Pretty much.

- I didn't think it would take him too long.

- 'Cause, like, you two haven't got to know each other

that well because he's been in Spain.

- Yeah. - As a little bonding session.

- Oh, you always set me up with bonding sessions,

with your dad or your cousin. - You love it.

No, this is a good thing.

I think that you need to get,

he doesn't it know you that well and vice versa.

- No, no, I'd love to.

I'd like to get involved with your family, you know I do.

- What did we do to you?

- Even though they're all so horrible.

- Even though they're what? - Nothing.

- Even though they're what? - Nothing.

- What? - I'm joking.

- No, say what you said.

Elliott is just being a protective older cousin

that walked in to me crying in Vegas.

- He tries to been intimidating like,

"Oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm big.

"Yeah, so don't you talk to my cousin." [grumbles]

- No, he's doesn't. - Don't worry about it.

- I think he's just, in a nice way,

he's trying to let you know, like.

- No, I get it I get it.

I've got sisters, I've got four sisters.

I mean, I know how it works. - Exactly.

[upbeat pop music]

- I've moved into my new apartment,

and I just want to get rid of all these clothes,

and just sort of start again, you know?

- Right, okay. - Bin or keep?

- Bin. - Is it that bad?

- It's Kat Slater. - I love Kat Slater.

- [Bobby] Yeah, I do, but we don't want her frocks.

- [Joan] Deffo.

- So, what do you think of the new apartment though?

- Oh, I love it, absolutely love it.

- It's beautiful, innit?

- Especially being all white. - Yeah.

- Anything is gonna go. - Look at these.

- [Bobby] They're so Cheryl Cole.

I reckon I could wear them with a high boot.

- [Gemma] Nah, gotta go.

- They still look all right though.

- If you watch the Discovery Channel,

every, I think six months a snake sheds its skin,

and that's what you're doing.

You're just shedding old skin.

- Yeah, its not really me.

Like my life's moved on now, but its like in Vegas.

It's so like, me and Bobby felt it a bit,

because everyone was arguing with their boyfriends.

- [Joan] Why was everyone arguing, what was?

You was out there to have a good time.

- Well, what happened is,

me and Gemma packed one suit case each,

and a lot of the other girls took two,

one of clothes and one of drama,

and it was like what's going on here?

We're meant to be on holiday.

- Bless her, Ferne was going on

about Charlie every five minutes.

- We get to the salon earlier,

and she's like, "I slept with him on the last night."

- Well, she obviously still loves him. don't she?

- Yeah

- 'Cause what ever happens,

at the end of the day people work it out, Gem.

- Yeah, do you know what?

I actually ain't getting involved.

But the best thing about Vegas I think

was obviously me and Bob spending time together

and then Elliott Wright, which is Jess' cousin,

he turned up in Vegas, he's really good looking.

- I'm even like that where I fancy Jess.

I think the whole gene pool. - Yeah, they're good looking.

- I would quite happily have 99% of Essex as the Wrights.

- With me and Charlie, they were obviously split up,

because he's gone off with like,

apparently 20 other girls after,

and slept with other girls, okay?

- 20.

- Even Ferne was saying she would never go back there again.

- [Dan] But then why is there still stress about it then?

Why is it such a big deal? - That's what I mean!

- To Ferne if she is over him. - Exactly.

Well, she obviously isn't.

- Even with the other girls he's been with after,

they've got the problem with me, they just don't like me.

She needs to blame Charlie not me.

- Yeah, it's more of Charlie.

- I just think though,

she'd be really silly to go back to him.

What I don't understand

is why girls go back to boys that cheat on them.

- Some girls need to get some backbone these days,

and just forget about guys, you're all trouble.

- I think everyone's as bad as each other nowadays.

Boys, girls, it don't matter what sex you are,

everyone's as bad as each other.

- I know, but I defiantly rather try before I ride.

- What, what do you mean?

- Because I'm basically saying,

that's what all the other girls do.

Like they're always--

- What, they ride before they try?

- Yeah. - Yes.

- What, so they sleep with someone

before getting to know them?

- Yeah. - Exactly.

Whereas me, I go on dates with the whole of Essex,

getting to know everyone and don't ride.

[cheering]

- Go on, Diags. - This is exactly like Vegas!

See, look, tokens!

- To be fair, that's much better

than a picture of Mike Tyson.

[laughing]

[cheering]

- Armour piercing. - Come on!

- I gotta hurry up, I've got to leave in a bit.

- Mate where you going, Lucy's house?

[laughing]

How you gonna get there, in a limo?

[laughing]

- What you got planned? - Just taking her for dinner.

Aren't I?

- It's weird like since you,

like, fell in love with her you're literally--

- I didn't fall in love with her!

- Mate, literally. - Well, I do like her.

But I'm not-- - A lot though?

- A lot, a lot. - Why do I like her a lot?

- [Diags] Because you have spent

all your time with her recently.

- I've spent two nights with her mate,

since we've been back.

- Every day! - I can't help it.

- That's a lie, three. - Two nights.

- [All] Three nights.

- All right three.

[laughing]

- Right what are you two doing

about Elliott's welcome back thing?

Are you gonna come tonight or what?

- Is that tonight? - Yeah.

- Yeah, I'll definitely go. - Yeah?

- Yeah, yeah. - All right, cool.

- Why are you worried about something?

- I'm just saying,

I didn't know whether you feel awkward or whatever.

- At the end of the day, obviously,

I don't know whats going on between me, Sam and all that,

but I know and you know that Elliott

is fuming about her staying round mine.

- Oh, I've been waiting for this glass of wine all day.

- How's work?

- It's really good.

I'm actually loving it, like I love the salon,

and the team is really cool,

but Gemma and Bobby come in.

- [Both] Oh yeah?

- And I told them about the last night.

- Yeah.

- And she was really going to town.

It kind of really pissed me off.

Sometimes with Gem,

I kinda feel really like it's unnecessary noise.

- I just think in future maybe,

just don't go to Gemma for advice.

- [Ferne] No.

- What you needed to do that one more time

to get it out of your system.

- Exactly, and now I feel like

I have totally turned a corner with Charlie.

I just wanna, just forget about it now and move on.

- Yeah, you know you don't wanna be with him.

- Have you heard from Joey since Vegas?

- Yeah, he rang me as soon as, well, the night we got back.

Now I'm not gonna lie,

I did give him a drunk phone call the other day.

- No!

- And then it resulted in him getting the hump,

and putting the phone down.

- [Ferne] Oh no!

- That's what you would do if he was drunk.

- Yeah.

- How you feeling about seeing Elliott tonight?

- I'm looking forward to it.

It will be the first time

I have seen him properly since Vegas.

- Hello babe. - Hello.

- Yeah, I need to sit down

and talk to Ferne about it really.

- You do Charlie, there is no time like the present.

- No, it's a horrible situation,

because we had such a good relationship,

and it's been so ruined.

- But if you love her, you'll get though it.

Yous two can work it out, I know you can.

- That's what you want as well.

I think the whole thing is quite fun anyway,

like the whole Tom thing.

I think we broke up six months ago.

She's got no right in saying

what me and Lauren have done, whatever we do.

- [Chloe] Yeah.

- I think maybe she said

that me and you have slept together to try and maybe...

- To try and make herself look better.

- No, because she cant fathom

that two people haven't slept together,

because she just sleeps with everyone.

That's why she cant understand

that a girl and a guy didn't sleep together.

- But you're a woman, and she's a girl.

- Have you missed me since Vegas?

- Might have done a little bit, yeah, you with me?

- Definitely have. - You look lovely tonight.

- You invited me to drinks, thank you.

- Do you want a drink? - Yes, please.

- What would you like? - Hi.

Can I have a vodka Slimline tonic, please?

- Yeah, double or single? - Double please. [laughs]

- Easy. - Anything else?

- I'll have a glass of wine, please.

- Any particular type of wine? - Sauvignon blanc.

- Yeah, no problem.

[Sam laughs]

- What are you laughing for?

- You, as you said it, it was like a accent.

[laughing]

- I said that, huh?

So, you enjoyed Vegas, yeah?

- I had such a good time out there, really good.

- Yeah, good weren't it?

- But just to clear a few things up,

I did spend a couple of nights with Joey,

and nothing happened, but we,

I felt that we had a lot to get off our chest.

We had a lot to talk about,

but now I'm back in Essex, my head's a lot more clearer.

- Yeah, you needed to have that conversation with him.

- Exactly.

- Do you know where you are with that yet?

- Yeah. [laughs]

- You all right, babe?

Cheers for that, cheers mate.

Right.

- Look Charlie, you've got water on you!

- Char, have some manners at the table.

- Can I have the name? - Ah, it's Tom.

- Oh awkward.

[laughing]

Oh my God, how embarrassing.

- I suggest the steak - I suggest the tuna, ta ta.

- What are they laughing at? - I don't know.

Don't worry about it.

- I wonder if they got a limo here?

[laughing]

- Oh, no you didn't!

- What are they laughing at?

- What are they laughing at?

- Yeah.

- They aren't laughing, are they?

- Yeah they are.

What did they say to you?

- Don't worry about it, who cares about them?

- I don't care, but it's just embarrassing.

You walk in to have a good night,

and they're all sitting there laughing.

- Let them laugh, give them something to laugh about.

Show your arse or something.

[laughing]

- Lockie, I met Lockie last year.

- Yeah.

- we went round to a party and he was there,

and we just started talking.

He's funny, I get on really well with him,

and we have a laugh, you know?

- What you think of Dan? - We're men.

- Hello. - Hello mate.

- Hello mate, how you doing? - You all right?

- Good, you? - Welcome back, mate.

- All right, mate. - Hi, Sam.

- All right, Diags. [laughing]

- Hi, you missed out in Vegas. - I know.

- You all right? - Yeah.

- You want a drink? - Yeah.

We're gonna get one now, yeah.

- What you want?

I'll get you one.

- What, so you're back here forever now?

- No, six months, six month.

Six months Spain, give it a go, see whats it's like.

- You still got the restaurant?

- Yeah, I'm gonna go out there

and look after the restaurant.

- Yeah? - See how that is, yeah.

- Come on, we'll go to the bar.

- Oh yeah. - Come here.

I've got a little something lined up for you later on.

- No surprises, mate.

I don't like surprises.

Look at you, you love that.

You're the centre of attention there, ain't ya?

- How is it? - All the heat there, come on.

- Boys arguing over ya. - No, I hate it.

Are you joking?

- You're getting hot flashes.

[laughing]

- You handled that situation very well.

- Yes nice, smooth as.

- Come on. - Right, let's go to the bar.

- Yeah. - Sorry guys

- Come on. [laughs]

- And then there was two.

[clears throat]

Obviously, we are good friends.

This is a good friendship.

It's just as long as we don't ruin the friendship by trying.

- Did you know she says she still loves you?

- Yeah, I know, but you can't say you still love someone,

and then go sleep with someone else in a limo.

- So at the minute with me and you, it's like,

I know you've just come out of a long relationship,

and I know it's gonna be hard for you,

because like for instance, there we just bump into them,

but at the minute I'm, like, reluctant to get a girlfriend,

and I have been for the last six months,

but at the same time,

you cant choose who you're gonna start seeing,

do you know what I mean?

You know I like you, you know I think you're beautiful,

but if there's still

all that shit going on and if you still got--

- But there's not.

- If you've still got really strong feelings for him,

then I don't want to get involved with that Luce.

- No, no, no, I wouldn't, I would not get back with him,

and I'm so glad we're back, and my head's sorted itself out,

and I really like you, and I'm completely the same.

I like the way it is at the minute.

All right, cheers. - Cheers.

- Fuck 'em.

- If she like walked in now and was like,

"Oh my god, Mario, I love you, I want to be with you."

What would you say?

- I'd say it wouldn't work.

- Do you know what shocked me about you

is that the first conversation it was like,

"Oh, so what you done?

"What's your jobs been?

"Have you been to Uni?"

And you were like, "Yeah I got first in economics."

I was like, "What?

"What the hell?"

- What, you didn't expect that?

- No!

No offence, but like,

when you're best friends with Joey Essex,

you don't expect their best mate to have a first.

- Me and Joey we're like complete opposites,

but that's why we're good mates.

I don't know, we've been mates since we were little kids.

- But you don't seem really clever, but I like that you are.

- Your boobs look massive in that dress, Luce.

- [Lucy] I know don't they.

I have my boobs out.

- [Tom] Your dress looks little bit small for ya.

They look, like, really squashed together.

- It's because nothing fits me.

- [Tom] I reckon you could hold this in there, look.

- [Lucy] Tom, nothing fits me since Vegas!

[laughing]

- It stands up!

Your boobs have definitely grown, babe.

- So what now?

- I don't know.

- I don't know.

Maybe it would be good to go out just the two of us,

and then see how it feels just us two.

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

- If it doesn't work, we go back to being friends.

- Yeah, because that means more to me than anything.

- We remember this right now, this conversation.

If it all fucks up, we still remain friends.

- We're shaking hands on this. - Yeah?

You can let go of my hand now.

- You can let go of my hand now!

[laughing]

[bright pop music]

[glass clinking]

- Oh God. - Here we go!

[laughing]

- Right, first thing I've got to do

is I've got to make an apology, because unfortunately,

I haven't prepared a really,

like, cheesy cringe poem like Ricky would have done.

[laughing]

I do honestly want to say Elliott,

I'm really glad you're back in Essex.

I think everyone is really happy you're here to join us.

We've got a lot of good times and fun times ahead.

So, cheers to Elliott everyone!

- [Group] Cheers!

- Cheers, Elliott. - Cheers, everyone!

- Sweet. [laughing]

[bright music] - Let's party!

- Lucy. - Lauren.

- How are you? - I'm good, how are you?

- Yeah, a little pissed off. - What about?

- That you seem to be telling everyone

that I slept with Mario. - Oh.

There is not actually any point

to this conversation is there, so?

- Well, there is.

- I hope you have a lovely, lovely meal.

There's not really any point is there?

Have a good night.

- Well, yeah there is, 'cause you lie, so that's the point.

- You just want to kiss me all night, don't you?

- I cant help it.

[laughing]

- That's cause you love me. - I love you.

- I want to hug you. - You want to marry me!

[laughs]

- You all right?

Sorry, am I disturbing something?

- Hello! - Am I disturbing something?

- Like you normally are. - What's going on?

- Nothing, we're just having a lovely chat actually.

- It's all good. - You happy now?

- Yeah. - It's nice to see you.

See you like this.

- Do you know what it is?

Right, I was talking to Jess earlier,

I was thinking you only ever see us

having a little row and that.

we're passionate about each other,

so when we do have rows, we have a row,

but we get over it we get back together.

- My opinion, is that I think

you're a bit immature for Jessica.

- Everyone in this world has got opinions.

Whether their opinions actually count or ether make sense--

- If my opinion don't account to you, that's fine.

- Yeah, it don't 'cause you don't know enough about us.

- You've just completely pied me

in that conversation with my cousin,

because you just said to me

that my opinion doesn't really matter.

- No, no, no, no, no, no. - That offends me.

- Hang on a minute, see his point for one second.

He's saying that you haven seen the best of us.

You've only see the worst.

- [Ricky] You're just giving an opinion

on what's flown out to you.

- Listen, listen, Elliott I wouldn't be here

if I didn't want to be here, let me tell you that now.

- Listen, I understand that. - I'm a strong person.

And if I wanted to walk away, I would walk away tomorrow.

- You all right? - That was awkward.

- What happened? - Lauren walked in the toilet.

- Did she say anything?

- She just wanted to say something

about her sleeping with Mario, and I said,

"Do you know what?

"There is no point in this conversation.

"Have a good night."

And I walked out.

- Okay good, but you're all right, yeah?

- I'm fine. - Good.

Just don't rise to it, whatever she's got to say.

It don't matter.

I've got a limo picking us up.

- Stop! [laughs]

Are you serious?

Are you serious then?

- No, but if I'd got one...

- You've such a cheeky face.

- Okay good. - Stop looking at my boobs.

- Stop putting them in my face then like that.

- [Lucy] I'm sorry.

- I've had a lovely night, it's been a nice surprise.

- How nice that everyone is here for you.

That everyone is here for you, that's nice, isn't it?

- Yeah, I feel welcomed, you know what I mean?

I've come back home, and I've not been here for a while,

so I feel like ive come home. - Yeah.

- Listen, um...

Why don't me and you go out for a drink?

- Yeah, I'd love to. - Yeah?

- We'd do it one night, what ever night you choose,

we'll do something together, yeah?

- Yeah, I'd love to.

- It would be nice to get to know you a bit more,

obviously we're around everyone else.

It would be nice to have a little one on one.

- Yeah.

- Boys, do you know what I can't believe?

- What?

- How she can just sit there talking to Elliott like that

in front of my face when all last night,

she's ringing me saying,

"Please tell me you love me, I wanna see you," and all that.

- No seriously though, yeah? - Yeah.

- All right, we'll sort it out another time.

Yeah, I'll give you a ring and we'll work it out.

- He don't know that she's been texting

and ringing me all week, all week.

[bright dance music]