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1
00:00:21,589 --> 00:00:23,389
Excuse me, buddy.
2
00:00:23,424 --> 00:00:26,234
Sir? Friend?
3
00:00:26,260 --> 00:00:28,560
Could you scoot
your car up a little bit
so I can reach the pump?
4
00:00:28,596 --> 00:00:30,526
I'll only be
another second or so.
5
00:00:31,432 --> 00:00:34,202
Okay. I'll wait then.
6
00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:40,166
(SIGHS)
7
00:01:14,842 --> 00:01:16,242
(HONKS HORN)
8
00:01:29,557 --> 00:01:32,187
It's just oil,
not rocket fuel.
9
00:01:34,195 --> 00:01:36,325
Oil runs our country,
my friend.
10
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:40,633
Excuse me.
Uh-huh.
11
00:01:40,668 --> 00:01:43,198
Is that half empty?
12
00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:46,167
Mmm-hmm.
Mmm-hmm.
13
00:01:46,174 --> 00:01:47,614
Thank you.
Or is it half full?
14
00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:49,181
(CHUCKLING)
15
00:01:59,220 --> 00:02:00,390
Finally.
16
00:02:03,324 --> 00:02:04,434
(EXHALES)
17
00:02:16,437 --> 00:02:18,267
(MUTTERS) I hate you.
I hate you.
18
00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:26,853
Come on.
19
00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:29,582
Ooh.
20
00:02:29,617 --> 00:02:31,217
(CHUCKLES)
21
00:02:31,252 --> 00:02:32,552
Would you like me to...
22
00:02:32,586 --> 00:02:33,786
No!
23
00:02:33,821 --> 00:02:35,221
All right, sir.
24
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:57,305
This has gotta be
Candid Camera.
25
00:02:57,345 --> 00:03:00,375
I can't believe this idiot.
Where's the cameras?
26
00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:08,857
There's a homeless guy
that'd do it for 50 cents.
27
00:03:11,259 --> 00:03:13,929
We're all one paycheck
away from that, buddy boy.
28
00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:27,283
(HONKING)
29
00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:36,417
Stay focused,
you're washing windows.
30
00:03:58,372 --> 00:03:59,572
(CRANKING)
31
00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:03,983
It means tightened.
32
00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:08,317
Safety first.
33
00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:15,391
Thank God.
34
00:04:18,859 --> 00:04:20,329
(STARTS ENGINE)
35
00:04:22,530 --> 00:04:24,330
What? What now? What now?
36
00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:29,469
Shrek!
Think you can move
sometime this century?
37
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:30,773
I beg your pardon?
38
00:04:30,804 --> 00:04:32,344
You've been here
for almost an hour.
39
00:04:32,340 --> 00:04:33,940
No, I haven't.
Yes, you have.
40
00:04:33,974 --> 00:04:35,714
How long does
it take you to
gas up your tank?
41
00:04:35,743 --> 00:04:38,713
During peak periods
I average between
12 and 14 minutes.
42
00:04:38,746 --> 00:04:41,446
Well, it takes me 3.
You gas it and go.
43
00:04:41,482 --> 00:04:43,352
Well, I think you know
what haste makes.
44
00:04:43,384 --> 00:04:45,794
Yeah, haste makes
a foot in your ass.
45
00:04:45,819 --> 00:04:48,089
Hang on, stupid.
I'm obligated to warn you
46
00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:50,361
that I studied karate
at the YMCA, all right?
47
00:04:50,358 --> 00:04:51,988
Why, was the
knitting class all taken?
48
00:04:52,025 --> 00:04:55,355
Isn't that always
the way?
It's funny that...
49
00:04:55,363 --> 00:04:57,063
Just get in your car.
Just get in the car
50
00:04:57,097 --> 00:04:58,767
or I'm gonna stuff
you in the trunk.
Come on, let's go.
51
00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,469
All right, junior.
Let's rumble.
52
00:05:01,435 --> 00:05:02,365
What you gonna do?
What's this, huh?
53
00:05:02,370 --> 00:05:03,940
I got something
that'd fit right in there.
54
00:05:03,971 --> 00:05:04,971
Come on.
55
00:05:05,005 --> 00:05:06,035
Yeah, what? What?
Come on!
56
00:05:06,073 --> 00:05:07,073
Let's go.
Come on.
57
00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:08,977
Come on!
What?
58
00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:10,779
Hey, hey!
Thank God.
59
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,711
There's no dancing
in this neighborhood.
60
00:05:14,382 --> 00:05:16,452
Hey, we weren't dancing,
we're fighting.
61
00:05:16,484 --> 00:05:18,454
Hey, Jimmy, they say
they weren't dancing.
62
00:05:18,486 --> 00:05:19,486
Officer.
They were fighting.
63
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:20,990
That man threatened me.
64
00:05:21,021 --> 00:05:22,061
No, she threatened me.
65
00:05:22,089 --> 00:05:23,059
Who you calling "she"?
66
00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:25,390
All right, that's enough
out of both of you.
67
00:05:26,059 --> 00:05:27,759
Now how did this start?
68
00:05:27,795 --> 00:05:28,855
I was trying
to pull my car up
to get some gas...
69
00:05:28,896 --> 00:05:29,796
I was trying to
service my vehicle...
70
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:31,400
(BOTH ARGUING)
71
00:05:33,434 --> 00:05:34,904
Please, please!
72
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:38,039
You're two grown men.
73
00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,441
Don't you have
better things to do?
74
00:05:39,473 --> 00:05:41,413
Yeah, I gotta get gas.
You give me gas.
75
00:05:41,442 --> 00:05:43,012
Yeah, you let
a lot of it out.
You smell that?
76
00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:44,883
All right,
knock it off!
77
00:05:44,912 --> 00:05:46,852
You, sir.
In your car and leave.
78
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:47,920
Yes, sir.
79
00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:48,848
Yeah, leave.
80
00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:50,882
You're lucky John Law
showed up, compadre.
81
00:05:50,918 --> 00:05:53,148
Oh, yeah?
Just get in your car,
you little woman.
82
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,146
I'm not a little woman.
83
00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:56,057
Yeah, you're a big woman
with big birthing hips
84
00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:57,829
and a camel toe.
85
00:06:02,996 --> 00:06:04,896
At least I'm not bald.
86
00:06:06,900 --> 00:06:08,870
And what do
you think that is
on top of your head,
87
00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:10,442
an 8-inch part?
88
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:22,715
Baby, you should have
seen this guy.
89
00:06:22,750 --> 00:06:26,490
He was, like,
9 feet tall and he
had arms like this
90
00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:28,690
and just boom,
boom, boom!
91
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:32,492
He's lucky
the cops showed up.
I was gonna hurt him.
92
00:06:32,526 --> 00:06:34,896
I can't understand
why people can't be
considerate of one another.
93
00:06:34,928 --> 00:06:37,698
Right, I'm telling you.
Could you get out?
I'm gonna watch the game.
94
00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:40,569
No game tonight.
95
00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:41,801
Why not?
96
00:06:41,835 --> 00:06:43,635
Because we're all
going out to dinner.
97
00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:45,571
Good, could you
bring me back some
fries and a burger?
98
00:06:45,606 --> 00:06:46,866
No, no, no, no, no.
99
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:49,477
We, as a family,
are going out to dinner.
100
00:06:49,510 --> 00:06:51,480
No can do, Jay.
Tonight is a very
critical game
101
00:06:51,512 --> 00:06:52,582
for Michael Jordan.
102
00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:54,983
Oh, please.
Every single time
you watch a game
103
00:06:55,015 --> 00:06:56,815
with Michael Jordan in it,
it's critical.
104
00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:59,690
No, Jay,
this game is special.
This is hyper-critical.
105
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,920
This is intensive
care critical.
106
00:07:01,955 --> 00:07:03,885
Listen, if they
don't win this game,
107
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,564
they don't
make the playoffs.
108
00:07:05,593 --> 00:07:06,993
And after all
Jordan's hard work
109
00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:08,857
to try and get
this team into shape,
110
00:07:08,896 --> 00:07:11,866
the least
I could do is watch.
111
00:07:11,899 --> 00:07:15,239
You remember the last game,
I missed it and we lost.
112
00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:18,668
We? I'm sorry,
which position do
you play again?
113
00:07:18,706 --> 00:07:22,506
Oh, come on, Jay.
Mike depends on me.
114
00:07:22,543 --> 00:07:24,653
Okay, do you
see him looking
in the camera, huh,
115
00:07:24,678 --> 00:07:26,508
when he's
chewing the gum?
116
00:07:27,748 --> 00:07:28,848
You know
who he's looking for?
117
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:30,022
Who?
Me, Jay.
118
00:07:32,019 --> 00:07:33,949
He wants to know
that I'm out there
supporting him.
119
00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:35,657
Uh-huh.
120
00:07:35,689 --> 00:07:37,589
That's right.
I'm the Mike
he tries to be like.
121
00:07:38,626 --> 00:07:41,226
I complete him.
122
00:07:41,261 --> 00:07:43,531
You're completely
out of you mind.
123
00:07:43,564 --> 00:07:45,204
And you're going
to Tokahana,
124
00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:46,602
so you might as well
get ready.
125
00:07:46,634 --> 00:07:47,944
Oh, God,
not Tokahana.
126
00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,598
First, Pearl Harbor,
then Tokahana.
127
00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:52,568
Why do they
hate us so much?
128
00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:54,976
Would you stop it?
It's a fun restaurant,
Michael.
129
00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:58,278
Fun? Jay,
what is fun about
sitting around a grill
130
00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:00,551
with strangers
covered in smoke?
131
00:08:00,548 --> 00:08:03,578
I feel like
Isaac Hayes
at the Oscars.
132
00:08:03,617 --> 00:08:05,687
Okay, fine.
You know what?
We'll vote on it.
133
00:08:05,719 --> 00:08:07,289
We'll let
the kids decide.
How about that?
134
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,860
I like those odds.
135
00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:11,689
All right,
Fredo, Connie, Sonny,
get in here.
136
00:08:13,193 --> 00:08:14,293
I didn't do it.
137
00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:15,627
I can't even reach it.
138
00:08:15,663 --> 00:08:16,963
It was like that
when I got home.
139
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:18,627
You know what?
It doesn't matter,
140
00:08:18,666 --> 00:08:21,736
you can all
be forgiven if you
make the right choice.
141
00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:22,999
Your mother and I want...
142
00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:27,136
All in favor of
going to a fabulous
restaurant tonight,
143
00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:28,744
raise your hands.
144
00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:30,309
(EXCLAIMS)
145
00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:31,713
Wait,
you guys are going?
146
00:08:31,745 --> 00:08:32,775
Yeah.
Of course.
147
00:08:32,813 --> 00:08:33,853
Never mind.
148
00:08:35,649 --> 00:08:37,149
That's my girl.
What about you, Kady,
149
00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:38,794
don't you wanna
stay home with daddy?
150
00:08:38,819 --> 00:08:40,889
Nope. I want
a Shirley Temple
151
00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:43,661
with lots and lots
and lots of cherries.
152
00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:45,591
With cherries?
153
00:08:45,626 --> 00:08:47,186
That's my baby
right there.
154
00:08:47,227 --> 00:08:50,827
Okay, well,
it looks like you're
the swing vote, Son.
155
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:53,602
What's it gonna be?
156
00:09:07,715 --> 00:09:09,615
Man, this is child abuse!
157
00:09:10,684 --> 00:09:12,694
Looks like a tie.
No, no, no.
158
00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:14,760
Kids, could you
please excuse
your daddy and me?
159
00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:16,618
I've been doing that
for 15 years.
160
00:09:16,624 --> 00:09:17,834
(EXCLAIMS) She's funny.
161
00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:18,958
She sure is.
162
00:09:20,828 --> 00:09:24,158
Michael, can't you set
the VCR, tape the game
163
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:25,227
and watch it
when we get home?
164
00:09:25,265 --> 00:09:27,835
I got a better idea, Jay.
Why don't you and the kids
165
00:09:27,868 --> 00:09:30,368
tape dinner
and I'll watch that
when we get home.
166
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,643
Okay, fine,
I'm putting my foot down.
167
00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:35,640
It's either
Michael Jordan
or me. Choose.
168
00:09:37,678 --> 00:09:42,748
I said it's either
Michael Jordan or me.
Choose.
169
00:09:42,783 --> 00:09:44,083
Michael,
I said it's either
Michael Jordan...
170
00:09:44,117 --> 00:09:46,647
Okay, okay.
I was just trying
to imagine
171
00:09:46,654 --> 00:09:49,664
what it'd be like
living in Washington.
172
00:09:50,858 --> 00:09:53,358
Let me put it
to you this way.
173
00:09:53,393 --> 00:09:56,763
Jordan's tongue.
My tongue.
174
00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:58,697
I'll get dressed.
That's what I thought.
175
00:10:09,176 --> 00:10:11,406
Welcome to Tokahana's.
176
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:12,784
MICHAEL: Thank you.
177
00:10:12,813 --> 00:10:14,113
Five dollars, please.
178
00:10:14,147 --> 00:10:16,217
Five dollars, what?
To park a car?
179
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,189
Come on.
What, you gonna
wash and wax it, too?
180
00:10:18,218 --> 00:10:20,148
(LAUGHS) Five dollars.
181
00:10:20,187 --> 00:10:23,757
I'm not paying...
The Bean Palace
charges $2.50.
182
00:10:23,791 --> 00:10:27,261
I'm not paying you
five dollars to
park my car.
183
00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:31,104
You're right, it's 6:00.
Now you're paying
seven dollars.
184
00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:35,736
No, no, no, no.
I'll park it myself,
thank you very much.
185
00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:38,769
No, no, no, no.
There's no self-parking
after 6:00, sir.
186
00:10:38,806 --> 00:10:40,336
Michael, will you please
just pay the man?
187
00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:42,083
You're embarrassing me.
And me.
188
00:10:42,109 --> 00:10:43,379
And me.
Yeah.
189
00:10:43,410 --> 00:10:45,750
No, no. This is
highway robbery,
Jay, okay?
190
00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:47,679
We're not even in
the restaurant yet,
191
00:10:47,715 --> 00:10:49,715
and already
we're being fleeced.
192
00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:50,780
I'm hungry!
193
00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:52,088
Yeah, we're all hungry.
194
00:10:52,119 --> 00:10:53,449
Michael, come on, pay him.
195
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:55,256
(CAR HONKING)
See, baby, this is
part of the scam.
196
00:10:55,288 --> 00:10:56,758
What they do is
they get you here,
197
00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:58,460
they got people back...
I hear you!
198
00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:01,431
Don't beep your horn at me.
199
00:11:01,461 --> 00:11:03,401
See, that's all...
These people work for them,
200
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:05,170
and then they
charge up the price
'cause they know
201
00:11:05,198 --> 00:11:07,168
you're hungry
and you're light-headed
and vulnerable.
202
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,100
Come on,
get back in the car,
203
00:11:09,136 --> 00:11:10,436
and we'll find
some free parking.
Come on.
204
00:11:10,470 --> 00:11:12,140
What? Uh-uh. You have
got to be kidding me.
205
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:13,772
The nearest
free parking
is a mile away.
206
00:11:13,807 --> 00:11:15,377
So what?
Walking is good
for your heart
207
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:17,238
and it's good
for your hunger.
Come on.
208
00:11:17,277 --> 00:11:19,107
We'll work up
an appetite.
No, this is so stupid.
209
00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:21,306
Come on.
And embarrassing.
210
00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:23,418
When you start the car,
can you just run me over?
211
00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:25,820
Here you go, sir.
Here's $10.
Ten dollars?
212
00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:27,763
JAY: I'm sorry
for your trouble.
Man, $10?
213
00:11:27,788 --> 00:11:29,088
And please
keep the change.
To park the car?
214
00:11:29,122 --> 00:11:31,762
Yes, I am,
and I wanna go eat.
215
00:11:31,792 --> 00:11:33,762
Ten dollars?
Yes, I gave him $10.
216
00:11:33,794 --> 00:11:36,164
Michael, he works hard
for the money.
217
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:42,500
Huh?
218
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:45,465
You just paid him
five dollars a foot.
He just moved two feet.
219
00:11:45,505 --> 00:11:47,265
That's five dollars a foot.
Will you just
please drop it?
220
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:52,007
I'm hungry, let's go eat.
Please, everybody inside.
221
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:55,775
Hey, I know
how much change
is in my ashtray.
222
00:12:11,264 --> 00:12:14,104
Good evening and
welcome to Tokahana.
223
00:12:14,134 --> 00:12:15,804
Do you have a reservation?
224
00:12:15,803 --> 00:12:18,043
Yeah, I got reservations,
but I'm gonna
eat here anyway.
225
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:20,411
The Kyle family. 6:00.
226
00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:23,010
Yeah, 6:00 on the dot,
that Kyle family.
227
00:12:23,043 --> 00:12:24,143
The Kylez.
228
00:12:24,177 --> 00:12:25,347
No, Kyle.
229
00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:26,508
The Kylez.
230
00:12:26,546 --> 00:12:29,276
No, there's no "Z" in Kyle.
231
00:12:29,983 --> 00:12:30,983
Kylez.
232
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:35,260
See, this is
another part of
the scam, Jay.
233
00:12:35,288 --> 00:12:37,318
What they do is,
they pretend
your table's not ready,
234
00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:40,187
then they push you
over into the bar and
you gotta buy $8 drinks.
235
00:12:40,227 --> 00:12:42,057
You're so paranoid.
236
00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:44,325
Kady, Kady, be careful
by that koi pond, please.
237
00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:48,174
Okay, Mommy.
Look at all these fishes.
238
00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:51,141
Unfortunately,
your table is not ready.
239
00:12:51,171 --> 00:12:52,541
(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)
240
00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:54,412
Please have a seat
in the Toko Lounge
241
00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:56,211
and we will beep you
when we are ready.
242
00:12:56,243 --> 00:12:58,313
Yeah? Did I predict it
or did I predict it?
243
00:12:58,345 --> 00:13:00,305
Yes, yes, Lord, yes.
244
00:13:00,347 --> 00:13:02,417
You predicted it,
Baldstradamus.
245
00:13:03,984 --> 00:13:05,224
I bet you the place
is not even packed.
246
00:13:05,252 --> 00:13:06,992
(SIGHS)
Watch this.
247
00:13:08,088 --> 00:13:09,988
No peeking.
248
00:13:10,023 --> 00:13:11,363
I just wanted
to check out
the environment.
249
00:13:11,391 --> 00:13:13,191
It's lovely.
250
00:13:13,226 --> 00:13:15,456
Please have a seat
in the Toko Lounge.
251
00:13:17,364 --> 00:13:18,474
Sure.
252
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:21,303
(EXCLAIMS)
253
00:13:26,439 --> 00:13:28,479
What is wrong with you?
254
00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:30,138
We'll go in the lounge,
255
00:13:30,177 --> 00:13:31,947
but we're not gonna
buy anything.
256
00:13:31,979 --> 00:13:34,479
That's okay.
Two drink minimum.
We charge you anyway.
257
00:13:43,423 --> 00:13:46,093
Hey, baby, stay where
I can see you, okay?
258
00:13:46,126 --> 00:13:47,356
Okay, Mommy.
All right.
259
00:13:48,095 --> 00:13:49,455
(WHOOPING)
260
00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:51,096
I'm gonna
go check out
the scenery.
261
00:13:51,131 --> 00:13:52,931
I saw a pretty girl come in,
262
00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:54,366
and I'm gonna try
to work some of my magic,
you know.
263
00:13:54,401 --> 00:13:56,171
What you gonna do,
make her disappear?
264
00:13:56,203 --> 00:13:57,303
(LAUGHS)
265
00:13:58,438 --> 00:14:00,438
Real funny, Dad.
266
00:14:00,473 --> 00:14:02,183
I'm gonna go
take a walk, too.
267
00:14:02,209 --> 00:14:03,479
Why?
268
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,080
'Cause I don't want
anyone to see me
hanging around
269
00:14:05,112 --> 00:14:06,452
Homer and Marge.
270
00:14:06,479 --> 00:14:07,949
You guys,
don't go far,
271
00:14:07,981 --> 00:14:09,381
they're gonna be
beeping us any second.
272
00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:10,476
What can I get you?
273
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,287
How about our table?
274
00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:15,189
Michael. How's your
Tropical Celebration?
275
00:14:15,222 --> 00:14:16,492
It's fun.
276
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:19,133
Oh, now I want
one of those.
277
00:14:19,159 --> 00:14:20,929
Okay.
278
00:14:20,928 --> 00:14:23,228
See, if we'd have ordered in,
we would've been
eating already.
279
00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:24,933
Probably finished.
280
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,025
Will you just relax?
It should be any moment now.
281
00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:28,297
Just calm down.
282
00:14:29,302 --> 00:14:31,442
Don't turn on the game.
Please, don't.
283
00:14:31,471 --> 00:14:32,671
You want me to turn
the game off?
284
00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:34,935
Yes, please.
I'm taping it.
285
00:14:34,975 --> 00:14:37,205
I can't know the score,
otherwise it ruins everything.
286
00:14:37,244 --> 00:14:38,484
So you want me to turn
the game off now?
287
00:14:38,511 --> 00:14:40,051
Yes, I'd appreciate it.
288
00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:41,180
How much?
289
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:43,384
I'd appreciate it
very, very, very much.
290
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:45,286
No, I mean, how much?
291
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:50,017
Are you hustling me
to turn the game off?
292
00:14:50,057 --> 00:14:52,957
I have an ex-wife
and a daughter who
looks just like me.
293
00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:56,234
I'll give you $10.
294
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:58,103
Wow, look at Jordan go.
295
00:14:58,131 --> 00:14:59,471
I'll give you 20 bucks.
296
00:14:59,499 --> 00:15:01,129
There you go.
297
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:04,102
Put it on the tab.
298
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:06,237
One Tropical Celebration.
299
00:15:06,273 --> 00:15:08,083
(EXCLAIMS)
Isn't she cute?
300
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:11,977
(BLOWS WHISTLE)
301
00:15:13,981 --> 00:15:15,121
(LAUGHING)
302
00:15:18,318 --> 00:15:19,418
(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)
303
00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:22,620
I hate this place.
304
00:15:22,655 --> 00:15:24,015
This is so fun.
I'm gonna take
a walk, baby.
305
00:15:24,057 --> 00:15:25,357
You enjoy your drink.
Okay.
306
00:15:43,143 --> 00:15:44,143
(SCREAMS)
307
00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:45,714
(EXCLAIMS)
308
00:15:45,745 --> 00:15:47,705
Oh, wow, baby!
309
00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:50,679
(YELLS)
310
00:15:50,717 --> 00:15:52,087
The baby fell
in the pool.
311
00:15:52,119 --> 00:15:53,249
What happened?
312
00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:54,346
I think she got too close.
313
00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:56,117
Mommy said
don't get too close.
314
00:15:56,156 --> 00:15:57,286
You pushed me.
315
00:15:57,324 --> 00:15:59,334
No, I was trying
to catch you.
316
00:15:59,359 --> 00:16:00,429
With your foot?
317
00:16:03,130 --> 00:16:04,730
We better hurry up
and just get her home.
318
00:16:04,764 --> 00:16:06,434
Round up the kids
before she catches a cold.
319
00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:08,296
No, no, no, no, no,
we are not going home.
320
00:16:08,335 --> 00:16:09,365
Come on,
Mommy will dry you off.
321
00:16:09,402 --> 00:16:11,042
We gonna go home?
No, we're not.
322
00:16:11,038 --> 00:16:12,708
Don't touch anything.
323
00:16:16,343 --> 00:16:18,513
I didn't push her.
324
00:16:18,545 --> 00:16:21,045
She fell.
I was trying
to catch her.
325
00:16:24,151 --> 00:16:26,051
You saw that, right?
I was...
326
00:16:28,155 --> 00:16:30,285
Come on.
Oh, boy. Come on.
327
00:16:41,634 --> 00:16:44,074
I still say he pushed me.
328
00:16:44,104 --> 00:16:45,774
It doesn't matter now,
329
00:16:45,805 --> 00:16:48,475
because now
you have a brand-new
pretty sweatshirt.
330
00:16:49,542 --> 00:16:50,742
(BOTH LAUGHING)
331
00:16:51,711 --> 00:16:53,111
She looks like a troll.
332
00:16:53,146 --> 00:16:54,206
No, I don't.
333
00:16:54,247 --> 00:16:55,677
Yes, you do.
MICHAEL: Hey, hey, hey!
334
00:16:55,715 --> 00:16:57,175
Stop laughing at me.
335
00:16:57,217 --> 00:16:59,187
Leave your sister alone.
Her hair looks nice.
336
00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:00,719
She looks like her mommy.
337
00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,264
(BEEPING)
338
00:17:03,290 --> 00:17:06,260
Is that our beeper?
Uh-uh.
339
00:17:06,293 --> 00:17:08,803
Well, I'll be damned,
they came in after we did.
340
00:17:08,828 --> 00:17:10,098
You are determined
to make this
341
00:17:10,130 --> 00:17:11,500
a miserable experience,
aren't you?
342
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:12,771
You just wanna go home
and see Jordan.
343
00:17:12,799 --> 00:17:14,669
No, no, no, Jay,
it's principle, okay?
344
00:17:14,701 --> 00:17:17,601
I just wanna be treated...
Forget it, I'll be right back.
345
00:17:20,607 --> 00:17:23,807
Excuse me, those people
got here after we did.
346
00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:25,113
What is your name?
347
00:17:25,112 --> 00:17:26,252
(MIMICKING) Kylez.
348
00:17:27,714 --> 00:17:30,124
Oh, you finally
pronounced it right.
349
00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:37,521
Very good.
Have you been enjoying
the Toko Lounge?
350
00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:39,557
No, I have not
been enjoying
the Toko Lounge.
351
00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:43,132
I'm all Toko-ed out.
I wanna sit down and eat.
352
00:17:43,130 --> 00:17:45,670
Your table was ready
20 minutes ago.
353
00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:46,828
Then why didn't
you beep me?
354
00:17:46,866 --> 00:17:48,496
I beeped you twice, sir.
355
00:17:48,535 --> 00:17:50,495
This thing hasn't
rang all night.
356
00:17:50,537 --> 00:17:51,837
Is that number 81?
357
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:52,871
Yeah.
358
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:55,875
Oh, that one is broken.
359
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:57,438
Then why didn't
you come get me?
360
00:17:57,477 --> 00:17:58,547
You could've hit me
in the head
361
00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:00,678
with a chopstick
or something.
I was right there.
362
00:18:00,713 --> 00:18:04,183
I didn't want
to interrupt your
Tropical Celebration.
363
00:18:04,217 --> 00:18:06,817
Now, if you
please go back
in the Toko Lounge,
364
00:18:06,853 --> 00:18:09,763
and I will beep you
when your table is ready.
365
00:18:09,789 --> 00:18:13,729
I thought you said
the table was ready
20 minutes ago.
366
00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:16,560
It was, but
when you did not
respond to my beeps,
367
00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:19,196
I gave it to 82.
368
00:18:19,232 --> 00:18:21,372
Which reminds me
91 is up.
369
00:18:22,669 --> 00:18:24,739
This is 145!
370
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:26,711
Yes, but that one works.
371
00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:30,911
Look, I really,
really hate this place.
372
00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:33,353
Can you hate it
from the Toko lounge?
373
00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:41,919
I can't believe it.
They gave our table away.
374
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:43,364
Why would they do that?
375
00:18:43,390 --> 00:18:45,690
They said the beeper
was a defective one,
so they gave us a new one.
376
00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:47,325
Okay. Well, look.
I ordered you a drink.
377
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:49,230
It'll help you
alter your mood.
378
00:18:49,262 --> 00:18:50,302
I need something.
379
00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:51,660
Good. Take a sip.
380
00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:54,503
(BLOWS WHISTLE)
381
00:18:57,270 --> 00:18:58,540
(ALL LAUGHING)
382
00:19:02,275 --> 00:19:03,535
Daddy, I'm starving.
383
00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:04,906
We're all starving.
384
00:19:04,944 --> 00:19:06,954
Bet you wish
you would've
voted with me.
385
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:09,649
Here, eat some
of these cherries
until the food comes.
386
00:19:09,682 --> 00:19:13,652
I'll put that on your tab.
It's a quarter a cherry.
387
00:19:13,686 --> 00:19:16,586
This place is a rip-off.
A quarter a cherry?
388
00:19:16,623 --> 00:19:19,333
How much did you pay
for the sweatshirt?
389
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:21,889
$60? You paid $60
for a sweatshirt?
390
00:19:21,928 --> 00:19:23,298
Lower your voice.
391
00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:24,900
(SOFTLY) Okay.
$60 for a sweatshirt?
392
00:19:24,931 --> 00:19:27,631
I am not
with these people.
393
00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:29,297
Jay, what is
wrong with you?
394
00:19:29,336 --> 00:19:31,896
What, was I supposed to
let her run around wet?
395
00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:33,868
You could
have improvised.
396
00:19:33,906 --> 00:19:35,536
You could have cut a hole
in one of the tablecloths
and made a poncho.
397
00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:38,645
$60? That's ridiculous.
I hope you're talking yen.
398
00:19:40,647 --> 00:19:43,617
You know,
I wish I would have seen
the price of that sweatshirt.
399
00:19:43,650 --> 00:19:45,520
Sixty for a sweatshirt!
I hope you're talking yen.
400
00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:47,392
You know what?
Cut it.
Cut it.
401
00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:49,320
Okay, fine, Jay. Fine, fine.
No. Cut it.
402
00:19:49,356 --> 00:19:50,916
Okay, this is your little
night on the town, Jay.
403
00:19:50,957 --> 00:19:52,487
Yes, I need it.
404
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:55,255
I'm just here, Jay.
405
00:19:55,295 --> 00:19:57,425
Would you like
to buy the lady
some roses?
406
00:19:57,464 --> 00:19:59,574
No, thank you.
We're sleeping
together already.
407
00:20:04,471 --> 00:20:05,611
(BLOWS WHISTLE)
408
00:20:11,278 --> 00:20:13,408
Your table is
right this way.
409
00:20:16,449 --> 00:20:18,889
You'll be sitting
with the Tyler family.
410
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:33,874
Next time on
My Wife and Kids.
411
00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:36,540
Well, you handled
that well, didn't you?
412
00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:37,869
Are you satisfied now?
413
00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:39,674
Can we stop arguing
with people?
414
00:20:39,706 --> 00:20:41,636
Can we have
a civilized meal,
please?
415
00:20:41,674 --> 00:20:43,644
Yes, yes.
That would be really nice.
416
00:20:43,676 --> 00:20:45,576
He put pee pee fingers
on my lobster.
417
00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:47,512
That's why
I brought this guy.
418
00:20:47,547 --> 00:20:50,047
That's repulsive.
What are you doing?
419
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,552
I'm seducing
that girl with
my mating call
420
00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:55,485
by licking my lips.
Girls love it.
421
00:20:55,522 --> 00:20:57,922
They only love it
if you can lick
your eyebrows.
422
00:20:58,991 --> 00:21:00,631
You know
what I wish, Michael?
423
00:21:00,660 --> 00:21:01,860
I wish you would just go
apologize to that man
424
00:21:01,894 --> 00:21:02,864
so we can all
eat in peace.
What?
425
00:21:02,895 --> 00:21:04,625
Yes.
Why should I apologize?
426
00:21:04,664 --> 00:21:06,674
He was in the wrong.
Clearly in the wrong.
427
00:21:06,699 --> 00:21:08,869
It's called being
the bigger man, Michael.
428
00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:09,941
I'll be the bigger man.
429
00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:13,039
No, no, no, no.
I was the bigger man.
430
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:14,512
(BLOWING WHISTLE)
29430
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