All language subtitles for The.Only.Way.is.Essex.S35E12.1080p.ITV.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-TBN_track3_[eng]

# Hold me
You said you'd stay forever

# Where will I go
Who's gonna make it better

# Hold me
You used to be my shelter

# Where will I go
Now you're not around

# Hold me
You said you'd stay forever... #

Hi!
Are you ready?

Like, not really ready,
but I just need to do the prep.

I feel like I just need you.
Let's do it.

Honestly, I've run out
of them eye patches,

so I wanted to come here
and get some.

# Hold me
You said you'd stay forever

# Where will I go
Who's gonna make it better

# Hold me
You used to be my shelter... #

Whoa!

Black-tie ready, yeah?
Black-tie ready.

Yeah, smart, boy!

So, that is a chin strap.

What the hell? How does this work?
Right, that's one.

Ready?
Yeah.

Right, we're going up.
Oh, my God.

How's that?
Great.

LAUGHTER

# Where will I go
When you're not around

# Hold me
You said you'd stay forever

# Where will I go
# Who's gonna make it better... #

Wow. Love.

This is dress heaven.

Dress heaven!

# Hold me
You said you'd stay forever

# Where will I go
Who's gonna make it better

# Hold me
You used to be my... #

It's amazing.
Wow.

Do I look good?
The colour.

Oh, I love a spray tan, girls.
You actually look really good.

WHOOPING,
LAUGHTER

Do you need to use extra product
for the bum?

We need to do a tan-line check.

WHOOPING

# Hold me
You said you'd stay forever

# Where will I go
Who's gonna make it... #

Close your eyes.
These are so good for your face.

HE GASPS,
EXCLAIMS

How cold is that?
That's so cold!

I do this near enough every day.

Oh, my God,
that made my willy shiver.

No it didn't!
It did.

# Where will I go
Now you're not around? #

You gotta look good.
You've gotta look really good.

Do you know what I'm wearing?
What are you wearing?

I've got a pink suit.
A pink suit?

Mm. What you wearing?
I've got a yellow outfit.

Have you?
Yeah.

Oh, my God.
I love pink on you.

Do you know what? Pink's probably
my favourite colour on you.

I feel like
everyone's gonna really, like,

push the boat out for this ball.

I know. Do you know what?
It's for such a great cause, though.

Like, with Becks and her,
you know, her epileptic.

Liv was telling me about it.

I didn't realise how bad it was,
to be honest with you.

I knew she had epilepsy,

I just didn't realise
how bad it was,

and Liv started crying
the other day,

being, like, really emotional,
cos, obviously, they're so close.

Imagine me and you.
Me and you. I know.

I think it's good Becks
is doing it, as well,

like, raising awareness for it,

cos I don't really know anyone
that's had epilepsy. I know.

Do you?
No.

Apparently, they're doing a quiz.

I'm either really good at quizzes
or I'm really bad.

Yeah.
There's no in-between.

No, I'm just really bad.
There's no in-between.

Sometimes, if there's, like,
a pop quiz round, like...

it's all like...
Music.

..you know, "What year did
Lady Gaga bring Born This Way out?"

I would know the answer.
Yeah.

You are really good
at Lady Gaga questions. Yeah.

But it's the only thing
you're good at.

Right, if they said to you,
"What is..." "What is..."

"What is the country...
What country spray tans the most?"

Essex.

No, that's not true. It's Hollywood.

Oh, really?
Yeah.

That's why we get on with LA people,
because it's quite similar.

They get us.
They get us.

So if our question comes up
about Essex,

then we're all right, aren't we?

But I feel like if they ask us
Essex questions,

then they're not gonna be
about spray tans

and vajazzles and prosecco,
they're gonna be about...

Essex as a county.
Real Essex county.

They're gonna be like,
"What's the cricket name for Essex?"

Essex Cricket Club.
LAUGHTER

Oh, my God, we...
But you know what I mean?

How have we ever got on in life,
Harry?

We've not got an absolute clue.

But, look,
I'm really excited for today.

I think it'll be lovely.

Everyone is gonna be there,
do you know what I mean?

Tweedle-dum and Tweedle-dee'll
be there.

I wonder if they got
their package yet.

Oh, my God, I'd...

HARRY LAUGHS
I've forgot about this.

Oh, my God!

I would love to have been
a fly on the wall there.

What do you think they done?

Pfft...
Probably, chucked it in the bin.

Honestly, like, I hope
they just see the funny side in it,

because, listen,
so much time has passed now.

I'm at a stage where I can...

sort of laugh about the whole
situation, do you know what I mean?

I've come out on the other side now,
so... You know?

I don't think, personally,
they'll be laughing about that.

Do you not think?

No, I... I think it's great,
but they definitely won't.

# You're gonna kill me
If you kiss it like that

# Got me in tears
But not because I'm sad

# Talking is boring
Let me pull your hair back

# Babe
Come on and kiss it, kiss it... #

Do you reckon anyone else
is preparing like this?

No. This is intense. This is insane.

What the hell
is going on down there?

What the fuck are you wearing?

We've gotta keep up with
these Essex girls, haven't we?

Jordan, this could be
our last hurrah.

What do you mean?
We've gotta look good for it.

It's terrifying.

Yeah, but no-one sees this bit.
Don't tell anyone.

Halloween ain't for a few months,
you know, guys.

What the hell is going on?

You actually look cool.
I look real weird right now.

I don't mind it.
I'm quite used to it.

You think she looks cool?
Yeah.

You need a chin strap.
Yeah!

LAUGHS

Yeah, you get this strap-on.
Wait, you can have mine.

A lot of things going on right now.
Absolutely...

Right, Jodie, give him the strap-on.
..fat-shamed.

LAUGHTER
Oh, God.

It's like you've just come out
of surgery.

I know, I look really weird!
That's what I said.

I had this when I got chin lipo.
Did you get chin lipo?

Yeah.
I could do with that.

Didn't work. It comes back.

Oh, my God, your chin's so good!
Got a good chin.

Mate, you know,
I actually do need this.

Ears are meant to go in them holes.
WASP BUZZING

Right, ears going in.
Jordan, lift, lift, lift, lift.

Yep.
LAUGHTER

Yeah, and then...
You look like ET.

Brilliant. Wow.
That's better.

It's got little holes
so he can breathe. Ah.

I think you should keep that on
for a bit longer. No, strap me off.

LAUGHTER

# What's there to say?

# A hollow house... #

Are you ready, Dan?
I am.

All right. Three...
TOGETHER: ..two, one.

Oh, I love it!
Not as extravagant as me.

You look unbelievable.
LAUGHS

You're gonna start skipping
around and dancing.

I dunno if midnight blue
is my colour.

I think it suits you.
I prefer royal blue on me.

I love it.

# What's there to say?

# A hollow house

# Where we used to stay. #

Feeling fresh, Ro, yeah?
Feeling fresh to death.

Look brand new, mate.
I am brand new.

Let me see.
I was stubble before.

Now I'm clean shaven.
You get stubble now?

Yeah, I get stubble, man.
Yeah, nice.

Be looking like you in a few years.
DAN CHUCKLES

Yeah.
Bro, your face looks like a snail.

You look like Diags.

That's nice.
LAUGHTER

That ain't no compliment.

I thought we was pals, mate.

That's low.
Nah, bruv, nah.

Ro, how long are you gonna
keep that on, mate?

You're gonna be minus years soon.

You're gonna be, like,
minus five years old.

# When the love is gone... #

I feel brand new, bruv.

# What's left to say?

# A hollow house

# Where we used to stay

# When the love is gone... #

Joesy!

Wahey!
It's transformation day!

So excited.
I'm excited. A little bit nervous.

Why are you nervous?
Just one request.

What?
Make sure I don't look like your ex.

Oh, my God, don't be silly.

I won't do that to you,
it's all good.

Please.
So, what are we actually doing?

Right, I'm thinking blonde.
Right.

So, I want blonde round the front.
I do want, still, bit of a root.

I want more creamy than ashy.

Stunning. I can see the vision.

I wanna look like
the Essex gay Ken doll.

You've needed a change.

What better time to do it
than before party time?

Party time. The big old ball.

# Love has gone

# Get over, get over

# I just can't get over

# When the love has gone

# Get over, get over

# I just can't get over

# When the love has gone. #

Oh, this is a lovely cup of tea.
I'm so good.

Mmm.
Mmm!

Ah. It's a cup of tea
that saves the day.

It's all I've needed all day.
Know what I mean?

I haven't had five minutes lately.
What's been going on?

Went to Amy's.
Pool party?

Yeah, kids' pool party.
How was that? Yeah.

Jordan and Sophie was there.
Lovely.

Your best friends.
SHE CHUCKLES

I mean, they WERE my friends,
weren't they?

No, I know.

You've come a...
Why you getting upset?

I don't know.

Why are you getting upset?

Oh, Junaid.
Sorry.

Oh, hold on.
It's just a lot. It's just...

Oh, God.
What are you upset about?

The other day, we was at Terry's,
like, just having a catch-up,

and then a parcel's
come to the house.

And it's, like,
Harry sent me and Joe a parcel

of his Cry Proof Powder,
and being like,

"Thanks to you two, this is...
this is what I've done now."

And I just feel like,
for the first time,

I felt like I was getting somewhere
with him.

If anything,
you should have been like,

"I inspire you."
I know.

You shouldn't have took that as...

Is it a dig or whatever?
Yeah, it might be, I don't know.

But that will make you stronger,
not weaker, even couples...

I feel bad, because when
I get into a situation like that,

obviously,
my insecurities take over...

Yeah.
..and I take it out on Joe.

Yeah. And it's not fair on me
to take it out on Joe,

cos he's done nothing wrong.
I know.

But I feel constantly like his ex
is always, like, always just there,

and always just, like,
it's always just causing a problem.

Do you know what I mean? Like...

Not really causing a problem,
but I just felt really mugged off.

Like, sending the package
to his mum's address,

there was just no need for it.

BREATHES SHAKILY

TEARFULLY: How, like, in my life,

I'm just so used to people
leaving, Lauren.

Babe, I know.
I've always been myself, on my own.

Do you know what I mean?
It's all I'm used to.

And my biggest fear
is losing everything

and everyone around me.

Joe loves you,
and he's not going anywhere.

I love you,
and I'm not going anywhere.

Do you know what I mean?

You need to stop stressing
about what hasn't happened.

I know it's so easier said
than done, cos I'm exactly the same.

I get it, babe, I completely get it.

You just need to let this all out.
I'm so glad that you've done this.

I just feel like...
Cos you need to let it all out.

I am really appreciative of you.
I do mean it.

Don't. Aw.

I am. Like, you are the best friend
I could ever ask for, Lauren.

Thank you.
And I would be lost without youse.

Love you. I can't see,
I've got all tears in my eyes.

Love you.

# And deal

# And deal with emotion kicks. #

# The only way is up! #

# From disco to disco
With him on my mind

# Watching him move
Under the mirror ball

# Make me believe
In higher miracles... #

I do love a good charity ball,
do you know what I mean?

I've never been to a charity ball,
I don't think.

# He put a spell on me
Like I've never known

# Don't know his name
Don't know his place. #

Can I say,
you look absolutely unbelievable.

You look unbelievable too,
and it's the highlights.

Oh, it's the blonde little number.
It's the blonde number.

Good job I'm gay,
because you would get it!

THEY LAUGH

# From disco to disco
He steals all the light

# He's all that I'm into... #

Is that jacket from your grandad?
Did you get dressed in the dark?

Power cut when getting ready?
THEY LAUGH

# So take me back

# So take me, take me back all night

# All night

# From disco to disco
With him on mind

# All night, all night

# Disco to disco
With him on my mind... #

It's gorgeous.
Look at the flowers, Elm.

# It's kind of magical

# He got me once
Now I can't seem to let him go... #

You look amazing!

So do you. Classy and nasty.

# All I know
All I know

# He comes alive night after night

# And then he goes... #

Ain't it nice
to have Cousin Wills with us?

We've got all the kids looked after,
now we can...

Ready to party.
Time to... party! Woohoo!

# From disco to disco
With him on my mind

# So take me, take me back

# All night, all night

# From disco to disco
With him on my mind

# All night, all night... #

CHEERING

Go on, my girl!

Test out the mic. One, two, check.
One, two, check.

# From disco to disco
With him on my mind

# All night. #

I just wanna start
by saying thank you

to everyone for coming today.

This charity means the world to me,

as it is something
that has affected my life daily.

Although epilepsy
is a part of my everyday life,

it doesn't define who I am.

Whoo! Whoo!
Whoo!

I was 28 when I got diagnosed
with epilepsy,

with two young children
who had to witness my seizures.

Sorry, I'm gonna get emotional.
That's all right. Go on.

And be trained not only
in how to deal with the situation

if I was to have a seizure, but also
to see their mummy in that state.

Come on, girl. Keep going. Come on.

Go on, Beck.
Come on.

Go on, Becks.
You're good. Take your time.

Nearly every hour,
a child or young person

is diagnosed with epilepsy
in the UK.

I want to raise awareness
and donate as much money as possible

to help children and young adults
that are facing epilepsy

to know that they are not alone.

So, on that note,
get your readies out.

CHEERING

Sorry, guys. Thank you.
Well done.

That was really tough.
Well done.

Get your readies out.
Don't be tight.

So, guys, are we ready?

Are we ready for the main event?
Yes!

CHEERING
Are we ready?

All I need is my quiz master
to come up.

Diags!
CHEERING

I'm gonna pass the mic over to our
Diags, who is gonna host the quiz.

LAUGHING: Look at him!

What's happening, everybody?!
CHEERING

Well done.
Well done, Becks.

Round of applause for Becks.
That was amazing.

CHEERING
Well done, baby!

Right...

for the charity,
the Young Epilepsy charity,

I will be doing a quiz,
hence the paper, everybody.

SHUSHING

Question number one.
Here we go.

Who is the current Prime Minister
of the United Kingdom?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Is it still Boris Johnson?

No, he was been and gone.
I love Boris Johnson.

"Is it still Boris Johnson"!
Oh, no, he's in America.

Who's Keith Starmer?
He's our... Prime Minister?

Keir Starmer!

Keir Starmer. Keir Starmer.

How many countries make up
the United Kingdom?

15.
Extra point if you can name 'em all.

Wales, Scotland...
Liverpool.

LAUGHTER

Don't you mean... "contaties"?
Contaties?

Continents? No.

There's six.

Wales and Northern Ireland.
It's four.

Yeah, we're out of the EU now.
Northern Ireland. It's four.

The answer is four.

Yes!

Extra point if it was
England, Scotland,

Northern Ireland, and Wales.

Did we get that right?
We got four. I knew that one.

We got that right. Relax.

What was that about Hertfordshire?

This one is about you guys.

Ooh!
Aw, I ain't in the mood.

Who's dated the most people
in this room?

Dan Edgar.
Dan Edgar.

Ella said that with chest.

Dan Edgar!
CHUCKLES

I've-I've not dated anyone else
that's here, apart from Ella.

Ella.
The answer is Harry.

Whoa!
It IS Harry!

You smooth little fucker, Harry.

Do you know what, guys,
I will take it, it's fine.

How many people in this room
have faced the wrath of Saffron?

LAUGHTER
Saffron, that is iconic.

Hands up if you've
faced the wrath of Saffron.

One, two, three, four, five,

six, seven, eight, nine people
faced the wrath of Saff.

Nine people. That's quite a lot.
I got it wrong myself.

LAUGHTER

Next question.

Who in this room never wears boxers,

and only wears
Tom Daley-style briefs?

Is it you? Is it you?

All balls, no tip.

Will.
CHEERING

I'm being told that Freddie's
partial for a brief as well.

He does enjoy a brief.

I'm known for wearing briefs.
It's all over my social media.

Show us!
Show us!

SINGSONG: Pull your trousers down,
pull your trousers down.

LAUGHTER AND CHEERING

All right, I'll give a point
for Freddie,

considering he's wearing 'em
right now.

One point for Freddie as well,
if you've put Freddie down.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Go on, Will.

SQUEALING

CHEERING
Come on!

Yeah!
Oh, my life.

SCREECHING LAUGHTER,
CHATTER

What is going on?

Go on, Wills!

Well done, guys.

Nice to see ya, cocks (!)

# Hey, ho, hey, ho

# Give me something
I can throw it back for... #

How well has Diags done there?
Yeah, he did well.

That was class.
That was so funny.

If anyone can do it, it's him.
He can get away with murder. Yeah.

But we did have a good few, though,
didn't we?

Yeah, fucking hell, of course.

I was in shock
that I was the most...

The people that dated the most.

I'm gonna be honest, you gotta kiss
a lot of frogs in life.

Absolutely.
You gotta kiss the frogs.

You do, darling.

And unfortunately, the frogs
are here with us, but no judgement.

Yeah, no judgement.
No judgement.

I'm fuming that we lost.
No, we didn't lose.

First's the worst, second the best.
Second is the real winner.

I probably answered, like,
80% of the questions.

Yeah, well done you.
I answered a few, thank you.

Tell me one question you answered.

I answered... who wears briefs.
The one about yourself.

Can I say one thing,
talking about briefs, Ella?

Ella, was that...?
That made me feel ill.

Oi, that's you all over, innit?
That's your type to a tee.

Listen, shut up.
Oi-Oi!

Because he's my friend!

Will, I'm not gonna lie,
the girls' eyes lit up.

Do you reckon?
Mate, Saffron's jaw!

Saffron's jaw is still on the floor.

Can I be honest with you?

I think the one that would love you
so much... Saffron.

Aw, Harry, that's lovely of you.

It's just a good friend, innit?
I go back with Saffron for years.

She's come to see me sing
and all that.

Listen, you're new in the group.
Take your time.

You ain't gotta, like,
decide overnight which one.

There is no rush.
Yeah, you've got no rush.

I'm not chasing it,
I'm just in the moment, like, yeah.

What don't help you
is you're a fucking catch, mate.

Yeah.

How do you feel, Sammy? Obviously,
your ex-bird's sitting opposite you.

It's obviously not ideal.
Any more tears left?

No, but I don't think
that's a bad thing, to show emotion.

At least you care.
Yeah, like, I cared about her a lot.

But at the same time, like...

I've had a bit of time since then,
and I've gone away.

Have you slept with anyone
since breaking up?

Have you slept with anyone?
Nah.

I've lipsed,
but I haven't slept with anyone.

Danielle!

Do you mind, Sammy?
It's nice to see you.

Are youse OK?
Great. How are you?

Are you OK, Jun?
Yeah, I'm good.

You all right?
Yeah I'm good.

I basically wanted to come over...
Sorry guys, by the way.

I just want to clear the air after,
obviously, the passing party.

Mm-hm.

And you come over and you said
you was sensing, like, bad vibes,

and you left.

I don't want you thinking
that there's, like, a new problem,

or genuinely actually any bad vibes.
Yeah.

I think I was just maybe,
like, a bit shocked

that you was there,
because it was so intimate.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The only reason
I come was cos Saffron invited me.

Yeah, I get that.
I was in two minds.

I know how much of a big thing
it was for you. Yeah.

When we was friends,
we spoke about it so much.

Know what I mean?
I was proud of you. Yeah.

That was it, and I just wanted
to give you my congratulations.

Yeah.
Honestly, no bad vibe my end at all.

Obviously,
I don't wanna be in an environment

where I feel uncomfortable,
and that's why I left,

but that's not like...
No, and I got that.

And, like, I didn't wanna
make you feel uncomfortable.

Yeah.
Youse two used to be best friends.

I don't actually hate you!

I do not hate,
I do not hate him at all.

It's a shame,
how we're not as close any more.

But it's life.
It just is what it is now.

Yeah, and I genuinely, like...

Yeah. I have nothing negative
or bad to say to you.

You was so close to me.

Just hug.

Hug. Aw! That's lovely.

Yay!
Whoo!

Cutesy. Very demure.

Listen to what me and Soph
are doing.

So, as youse all know,

obviously, we're going
to have this treatment done.

And youse know how much me
and Soph want what we want,

and it is gonna happen.
BLOWS LIPS

It is. You got it, mate, come on.

Fucking hell, man.
Jord!

It's gonna happen, mate.
You know it's gonna happen.

Course it is.
You're on the right journey.

Two and a half years.

I've had the worst year this year,
like, the worst year. I know.

What doesn't break you
makes you stronger.

You are so strong.
I know.

And what you've went through
and what we've went through together

is, like, me and you are gonna
come out this so strong.

When we hold
that little baby one day,

that little baby will have no clue

of what we've done
to get that baby there.

I know, but, like, you...
We'll do everything to get there.

That's the thing there,
to go through it together.

Soph, Soph...
You've got together.

..you are so strong.

Jordan, you are strong,
but you know what, Soph,

I lift my hat off to you,
cos you are fucking strong, babe.

Mate, she's carried me
through this entire year.

Without her, I wouldn't
have been able to do anything.

Honestly,
you are the most loveliest people.

You are both always there
for all of us.

Listen, everyone gets there.

Mate, come on, you got good people
around you, mate.

Come here.

We've got this, Jord. Don't worry.
We're gonna get there.

I love you.
We're in this together, remember.

It's not just you, it's me as well.
We've got this.

Jordan, we are so proud of you.

You and Soph, listen.
It's gonna happen. It's gonna be...

Every night, youse two, I pray
for both of you it's gonna happen.

You know it's gonna happen.

Don't worry, darlin',
we've got this.

Eh? Fucking be strong.
You've got this.

You gotta be strong.
Yeah.

Yeah? I love you.
It's scary, man.

It is scary,
but think of the fucking end goal.

We're gonna be all right.
Think of the end goal.

Give me a kiss.
I love you so much, yeah?

# Wherever you go
I want you to know that I pray. #

# The only way is up! #

# Will you still love me?

# Will you still love me? #
Whoo!

# Will you still hold me?

# Until the bitter end... #

Right, everybody,
time for the auction! Whoo!

Can we have a round
of applause for Becks?

CHEERING
Yes, Becks!

Yes, Becks!
You go, girl!

# Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

# Be there. #

So, for the first item on the list,
this has been donated

by someone quite close
to everybody in this room.

It's caused quite the controversy.
Oh.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Uncle Saffron's black hat!

CHEERING

Who wants it?

Fiver!
Roman?

Five.
£5 from Roman.

Can we get more?

20!
20 from Chloe Meadows.

30.
30!

50!
No!

60!
What?

No, 100.

Hundred pound from Dan Edgar.
Hundred!

For the black hat.
Hundred quid.

Going once, Uncle Saff's black hat.

Going twice.
Uncle Saff!

Sold, hundred pounds, to Dan Edgar.
CHEERING

Paid hundred quid for the hat!
That's hysterical.

What, Dan, are you gonna wear it?
It's for you.

Put it on.
She wants it back.

Put it on.
I ain't putting it on.

Oh, Dan, don't be a spoilsport.
It's for you.

Take one for the team,
it's for charity.

Take your hat back.
No, his hair's too important.

Take one for the team.

CHEERING

CHANT: Uncle, Uncle, Uncle, Uncle!

Uncle, Uncle!

OVERLAPPING CHAT

Right, ladies and gentlemen,
the second item on the list

runs very closely
with the first item -

Grandma Chloe's red hat!

I want it back!

APPLAUSE

I regret wearing that now.
Fiver!

Fiver, Elma Pazar!
Can we get more than a fiver?

15!
15, Chloe Meadows.

50!
50, Harry Derbidge.

It's gotta match the black hat,

it's for charity,
someone do a one-er.

It's for charity, James,
do a one-er!

Go on, James!
Hundred pounds!

CHEERING
Well done, James, good man.

APPLAUSE
Youse are great sports, you two.

Jodie will look gorgeous in that.

CHLOE: Oh, beautiful!

Gorgeous.
Ah, it's class.

Right, on to our third prize.

Now, we all know...
We all know that one of our friends

owns a very, very,
very big plumbing company.

Yeah.
Oh, it's getting interesting.

And he has donated
an entire new bathroom...

Whoa!

Oi, oi, oi!

..worth £10,000.

Whoa!
You're lying!

This is crazy, man.
LAUGHTER

Right, we're gonna start
the bidding. Roman!

One pound.
You fucking having a laugh?!

£60.
£60, Sophie.

A hundred pounds.
Hundred pound, Chloe Meadows.

150!
150.

250.
250 from Liv.

280.
280, from Lauren Goodger.

More, more!
280.

350!
No. 280 pound.

Going once.
For James to do Lauren's bathroom.

Oh!
Sold!

How much was it again?
APPLAUSE

Next lot.
Right, this is quite a big one.

Again, ladies and gentlemen
and girls,

you get these flowers, and you get
a night out with Will Childs.

ALL: Oooh!

Liv is first up.
Hundred pound, Liv!

Can we get a 150, babe?
Saffron!

Saffron, can we get a two-er?
I'm not paying to date him.

Saff, I'll pay for you.

150 pound from me,
for Saffron to go on a date.

Come on, Saffron.
What?

Don't start a war, babe.
We're going to war.

No 250s, El?

I've had my bunch of flowers
this week, thank you.

But do you want the date?

JODIE: Oh, I feel really awkward.

How much was it? Ella...
Ella wants to go out again with him.

Oh, my God, Saff, carry on.
What's your problem?

It's a fucking joke.
Yeah, but it's not funny.

I don't find it funny, Saff,
so stop being a bitch.

I don't find it funny.
Being a bitch? You were laughing.

Yeah, but it's upsetting me.
Why is it upsetting you?

DAN: Stop. Listen, just stop.

I told you I don't find it funny,
and you're still doing it.

Listen, just stop.
Oh, don't cry, El.

Listen, stop.
Idiot. It's a joke.

I know, but listen, just stop.

I've gotta get out.

Ain't no need for it.

Someone come and get the flowers.
I'll have the flowers.

Here, Roman, come pick 'em up, son,
they're yours!

Go get 'em, mate.
Jodie, sold, £200!

Jodie Wells.
Yes! Come on, girl!

Well done, baby. Well done.

What did Saff say for Ella
to get annoyed in the first place?

She keeps going,
"You wanna go on another date,

"you wanna go on another date
with Wills."

She's bothered about the Dan thing.

And she probably
doesn't want Dan thinking

that there's actually
something going on between them,

in case they can rekindle.

Yeah, I think it's the first time
she's been around Dan.

Know what I mean? She doesn't want
that brought up in front of him.

So she's ended up biting.

She acted on emotion
cos she was crying. You act on...

Ella was like,
"I couldn't believe..."

HARRY: That was a lot, wasn't it?

WILL: Ah, it's so bad.
Innit.

The second Will stood up there
with the flowers,

all the girls that fancied you
just went...

Quiet. No, yeah, they did, yeah.
It was, like, awkward.

No-one wanted to show
their affection.

I'm standing there like a wally.

No, you're all right.
You're not a wally.

Dani, how would you feel
if someone shouted across

in front of a whole room of people?
It's a fucking liberty.

I am fuming, yeah,
because I was having a joke.

No, I get it. You've not meant it
in a malicious way.

But I think she's feeling sensitive
now cos she's around Dan.

She hasn't been around him in ages.
Oh, OK.

I don't think she wants to speak
about another boy

in front of her ex,
I think that's the issue.

Well, he's moved on, sadly.
I know he has.

I think that's why she's
a bit uneasy and a bit sensitive.

Sorry, I didn't realise
she was so bothered.

She's never made that clear.
She really ain't.

# It's just another day

# And it's not over
Till it's over

# It's never over. #

# The only way is up. #

# These nights feel longer

# Is that cos I'm far away from you?

# When I close my eyes
And remember your face

# I hear you in thunder
I feel you in rain... #

Thank you for my hostess
with the mostest, number one.

Love you.

And thank you to my hostess-mostess
with number two.

That was mad in there, weren't it?

To be fair, I see...
I see both sides.

Think there's no need for drama.
We're at a charity event, H.

JUNAID: Do you think Ella's
all right? I feel for her.

FREDDIE: I've texted her.
I feel bad for her.

She's gone, like, missing.
I know.

# I can't see the colours

# Is that cos I'm far away
From you? #

What do you think
I done wrong there?

I could tell she felt uncomfortable.

Did you feel bad for her?
Well, yeah, but I don't know why.

After everything that's happened,
I did feel a bit bad for her, yeah.

Well, you're not heartless.

Just because you don't just get over
something in a few months.

Like, you get over it,
but you don't...

You still have some sort
of feeling towards someone.

Yeah.
You can still care about someone.

And a level of respect.
Yeah.

Mm.

Does anyone want a drink?
I'm fine.

You have a drink.
You sure?

I'm gonna get a drink quickly
cos I've run out.

Yeah.
No, but I think it is exactly that.

Yeah, and then when...

Hi, my love.
Hello.

Can I please get a prosecco, please?
Of course.

Junaid's going over to Harry.
Oh, God, what's going on?

Oh, God, I feel...
My heart's in my throat.

Harry, you all right?
Oh, thank you so much. Thank you.

Hi. You OK?
How are you?

Good, thank you. You?
Yeah, good.

Listen, I just wanted to come over
and have a conversation with you.

Obviously, we haven't spoken
for, like, about a year now,

and I haven't really seen you.

When I saw you the other day
outside Dan's launch,

getting into your car, to me,
you looked quite upset.

And for me,
that made me feel really bad.

And in hindsight, just, like,
thinking about everything,

like, once upon a time,
we were really good friends. Mm-hm.

And it does make me feel
really upset,

like, what I have done to you.

And it was only the other day,

when I saw you going into your cab,
I was looking directly at you,

and I could see
the hurt in your eyes.

And I genuinely want you to know,
from the bottom of my heart,

that is something
I really do regret,

and I am so sorry
for doing that to you.

Do you know what, I feel like...

..put Joe aside,
the love that I fucking had for you,

the amount of fucking love
I had for you,

fucking before him, before anyone...
No, I know.

..we went through so much together.

And I think that...
that's what hurts me more.

No, I know.
That's what hurts me more.

Harry is still allowed to be upset,

and he's allowed to be upset
for as long as he wants to be upset.

But you guys also deserve
to be happy.

Exactly.
A hundred percent.

Yeah, which is really hard, because
this is a group all together.

Not that I've been
in a little bubble,

but seeing you
for the first time like that

made me realise the pain
I've caused.

Maybe this is the right time
for you to say that,

because I always kept thinking
to myself, "When is he gonna do it?"

Mm.
I know you sent a text.

But that, to me, is nothing.

Course. I get that.
This, this is real.

Yeah.
And...

And I mean every word I'm saying.

I know we haven't been friends
for a while,

but you know me as a person as well,

I do put up this front
and I act all confident.

Even speaking to you now,
it's hard for me to speak to you now

cos I know the pain I've caused you.
But listen, listen.

You sit there and you say,
"Listen, I put a front up,

"I do this, I do that."
You've done what you done.

I take full responsibility.
You've done what you've done.

You can't change that,
and you have to admit that.

Course.
And own it. And do you know what?

Probably, it would have been
a lot more easier for you

if you had done this
a long time ago.

Listen, this is something
that Harry will carry with him

for the rest of his life.
Hundred percent.

It's a trauma.
Like, in a relationship now,

he probably will have insecurities,
going forwards.

I appreciate you saying it, finally.
Yeah.

I can be around youse.
Yeah.

I can laugh.
Yeah.

I sent you the package.
Hope you found it funny.

Like...
I mean...

It's funny, do you know what I mean?

He's not over it.
No, definitely not.

He's brought a make-up range
called Cry Me A River

or it's called whatever it is.

And he named it after them.
Yeah.

Not over it, are you?
Nah.

You don't do that.

Time has moved on.
Yeah.

But saying that,
I will never be friends with you.

I will never have you in my life.
That's fair enough.

Because once you do dirty,
that dirty,

you never take someone
back in your life like that.

Yeah, and I respect that,
and I don't expect that.

All I wanted you to know
is that a year down the line,

like, a line does need
to finally be drawn under this.

And from my part...
And I think this is a good start.

Yeah. From my part, genuinely,
I'm looking in your eyes right now,

I am sorry
for what I've done to you.

I do really, really appreciate it.

I saw you come over to the bar,
so I thought I'd come over.

But I do genuinely wish you
all the best, Harry.

I'm gonna be honest,
I appreciate you did.

No, all right. Take care.
OK. Enjoy.

Well done.

JOE: You OK?
Yeah. You?

What was that?
Huh?

You OK?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What happened?

I just apologised
for the hurt that I caused,

and what's happened over the year.

Guys, I think it's done now.

There's no more apologising
you need to do.

Yes, it was fucking shit
at the time. Horrible.

It's not a nice thing to go through.

But what are you gonna do?
Youse are still in love.

You're still with each other.
It's not like it was for nothing.

You guys are
in a very happy relationship.

The main thing is
that you feel good about it.

FREDDIE: Yeah.

You feel like you've done
the right thing,

and, hopefully, we can have that
peaceful little life that we want.

Yeah.

Aw!
We'll see if it happens.

I think they're so cute.
Hopefully.

OK, my angel?
Pfft.

I couldn't really listen in.
Yeah, we couldn't really hear.

Oh.
Couldn't see what's happening.

Are you OK?

Yeah, fine.
Take a sip.

Do you know what,
I think it was a long time coming.

Yeah.
I think it was a long time coming.

Like...
Did he say sorry?

Yeah.
Harry, I had Junaid at my house

the other day, sobbing that...
I knew he was gonna apologise.

I know it's so hard for you
to realise and see it,

and people are like,
"He's not genuine."

He really has lost a lot,

and heartbroken that he hurt you,
genuinely, I mean it.

I know. And I know
it doesn't make it any easier.

I've just said that to him,
I could. I...

I appreciate it, that you're sorry,

I can tell in your eyes
you're sorry.

I'm looking at you right now
for the first time in this whole...

He misses you all.
But he can never come back.

Ever.
No, of course not.

He can never come back.

This is closure now. He's apologised
to you, he's said sorry.

It's the last piece of the puzzle.

You can walk away.
Listen, I'm fine.

# I still got something to give

# Though it hurts sometimes

# I'm gonna get up and live

# Until the day that I die

# I swear to God I survived. #

Mate, how nice is this?

Lovely, innit? The setting's...

You know what, it's nice
to get away from the madness, innit?

Mate, I knew when I come here today,
when they said "quiz", "auction",

I just thought, room full of tables
with everyone, it's gonna...

Do you know what I mean?
It's never gonna be smooth sailing.

Yeah, when you throw that
in with an auction.

I just felt like
it was right tense.

Like, I didn't really like the end.
Nah.

How that... I dunno.

I think there, you know what I mean,
with Wills,

I think he just felt
a little bit awkward there.

Well, I think it was awkward
for everyone involved, weren't it?

How did that make you feel, though,
in there?

Where, you know, you got Saffron
and Ella going at it,

and you're sitting there
in the middle, sort of...

I didn't like it. I don't like
the fact that she's upset.

I don't like the fact
she feels uncomfortable.

You had feelings for her.
Yeah, mate, of course.

You've cared for her.
Of course.

I didn't think
I'd find it as hard as I would have,

coming here today
and being around her.

Of course,
I weren't looking forward to it,

but I just thought,
"Listen, deal with it", whatever.

But it's a weird one,
because back then, when we split up,

I... I obviously wanted it to...
I wanted it to work.

I didn't want us to go
our separate ways.

I didn't want it to go the way
that it went.

I think I just had
something with her

that sometimes in the past
I've not fully had.

Mm.

Do you feel like you let your wall
down a little bit more with Ella?

I think so, yeah. I think I did,
for the first time in a long time.

Do you feel, like...
that you loved her?

Yeah, of course, yeah.
Yeah.

Of course. Definitely.

But there's also, like,

one thing of what your heart
tells you in a situation,

and there's what your head's
telling you in something,

and it's that battle
between the two.

But maybe there's something there
that you need to have a...

Ah, mate, there's a lot of...

..conversation...
There's a lot of unsaid...

..to actually tell her
how you actually felt.

There's a lot of stuff
that's been unsaid.

# The day you left
You took the best of me

# And if that's not enough for you

# And who will love me
for the rest of me?

# And the rest of me
Just won't do. #

What the hell happened, Ella?

I just see Saffron shouting.
How are you feeling now?

Do you know what it was, it's
because when I was outside earlier,

I said to Saff, "Stop putting me
in awkward positions,

"cos you're literally sitting
next to my ex.

"It's not making me feel very nice."
Yeah, it's uncomfortable, isn't it?

And it's not that, like,
I don't want to...

make Will feel uncomfortable either.
Mm-hm.

But really, if I think about it,

it is not just because
of that situation with Saff.

It's deeper than that,
do you know what I mean? Yeah.

I'm around someone that I hold
a hell of a lot of love for still.

This is the first time
you've seen Dan.

I feel like there's still a lot
of feelings there for him still,

and that is normal.

Like, you found out
he's seeing someone,

you haven't seen him in ages,

and then youse have gone
back to, like, not speaking.

Like, I understand that is...
It's hard.

I don't ever wanna, like, hate him.

How do you feel
now that you've seen him?

I still feel like there's so many
things that need to be said.

Like, and I keep thinking to myself,

like, did I just run from something
because it was hard? Mm.

Do you feel like it's
the complete end with youse two?

I don't.
I don't feel like it is.

It's the weirdest thing, cos I...

But it's, like, if it's not the end,
then where do we go now?

Mm.

Youse being around each other today,
I feel like it's quite obvious

that there is still feelings there.

And Ella, even on his side,

it's obvious
he still really cares as well.

I still love him a lot.
I know. I know you do.

Don't cry, honestly.

It's OK.

Like, youse have been
through so much,

there's been so much back and forth,
and there's been so much love there.

Like, it's not just gonna go,
it isn't.

Listen, youse might not
sort things out now,

but I don't think
write that off forever,

when the feelings are clearly, like,
really, really strong.

He showed today that he cared, like,
when he was speaking to Saffron

and told her to back off.

That's a big sign.

Hi.
You all right?

I feel like youse two need to have
a bit of a conversation, so...

Right, see you, Dani.
I'm gonna go. Call me after.

I will.
OK.

I love you.
See youse later.

Bye.

HE SIGHS

Listen, firstly, I ain't come...
I can't even look at you.

I ain't come over for a row.

I don't want
there to be an argument.

TEARFULLY:
And I don't wanna hate you.

I know. Me neither.
SHE SOBS

DEEP SIGH

SHE SNIFFS

Look, I hate the way
this has turned out,

just as much as you do,
whether you believe that or not.

And I find it just as hard,
being in this place with you today

as you do, trust me.

Like, it's been horrible.

But whatever went down earlier,
then, in that auction,

I didn't like it.

Regardless of what's happened
between me and you,

I didn't like the fact that
I could tell you was uncomfortable.

I didn't like the fact
that she started piping up

and trying to... egg it on.

I don't think it was fair, cos
I have a level of respect for you.

Yeah.

And I feel like that was putting me
in such an awkward position,

because, listen,
I'm not ready to meet anyone else.

I'm still hurt that it never worked.

And I wish I weren't.

HE EXHALES

Well, yeah, like, I...

..I feel frustrated
at the fact things...

went the way they went, and that
it didn't work for whatever reason.

Listen, I was never looking forward
to today.

Me neither.
Cos I knew it was gonna be hard,

being in the same room
in a group situation.

I thought I'd be all right...

cos normally I'm a tough cookie,
and I can just mask it and be fine.

Your way of dealing with that
is to attack.

But I haven't attacked you today.
You haven't, no, yeah.

That's what you feel in love with.
Well...

Yeah, course.

There was a point where
that is exactly what I wanted.

It's just a shame that other things
got in the way of that.

Yeah.

I think me and you,
away from all of the noise

and all of the chaos and the madness
and our day-to-day lives...

..clearly had something there,
have something there.

But when you throw
all the rest of it into it...

..it, erm...

It seemed to not work.

Mm.

Yeah.

But we loved each other.
Yeah.

Course.

# Cos I'm gonna need this

# When I'm holding pictures of you

# And that's
All that I've got left. #

Subtitles by accessibility@itv.com

# The only, only, only, only, only

# Only, only, only, only

# The only way is up, baby

# For you and me now

# The only way is up, baby

# For you and me now

# Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh. #