Original subtitles

tonnes of tears and a marathon achievement.

The tans you see might be fake but the people are all real,

although some of what they do has been set up

purely for your entertainment.

Previously on The Only Way is Essex.

- Lovely do you know what, it'd be great to sort things out

and maybe take her out.

But if I don't then there's all these girls.

- When you've got your sister's best mate,

surely you knew it was gonna be like that.

- I thought we'd get past it but when it actually happens,

you realise like this is getting way too awkward.

- Pretty much everyone knows

you've been texting someone else.

Unless you say it, I will.

- You know I'm seeing Jess,

so I just want it to end here alright.

[jazzy music]

[hip hop music]

- I just can't believe you're

eatin' that before the marathon mate.

It's just amazing, it really is.

- I need energy mate!

- If I was to run the marathon I'd have porridge

with a bit of honey on it you know,

something to maintain ya.

Scrambled eggs on toast, a good bit of protein.

All that's gonna do is just wreck ya before you run.

- I've been dieting for a month and a half,

I've lost a lot of weight and you know the marathon's

all about you know, eating lots of carbs,

stuff to give you energy.

If I don't eat this sort of food

I won't make it half way round the track.

- Are you nervous?

- Yeah. I'd be nervous eating that before a run as well.

- Shut up Ric, fuck sake man.

Just let me eat my breakfast, fuck sake.

- You know you gotta pace yourself, you do know that.

- Yeah, well I can't really sprint anyway so.

- Well no so don't,

so what techniques are you gonna adopt?

- I'm gonna go for a cross between a power walk

and a jog, so I call it the plod!

- The plod?

- Yeah the plod, it's just me plodding along.

- Well it's very apt to go with ya, put it that way.

- I think I've had enough actually.

[upbeat electronic music]

- I'm shittin' myself, I ain't gonna lie.

Do you know how far 26 miles is?

Like if you went all the way round Essex

I don't even think that's 26 miles.

- Are you still tellin' people though

that we've actually run 12 miles?

- Well we have run 12 miles.

- No we basically run three, had a coffee,

run three had a sunbed, run three went home.

- Yeah well if you add 'em all up together that's 12 no?

- No that was nine actually!

- You know what I mean Cara!

- Because this isn't funny, it's 26 miles.

Do you reckon Arg is shittin' himself like we are?

- Yes, he ain't admit it though, he's gonna pretend.

He's gonna be like "Yeah, I can run".

He's frontin' it.

- Yeah, we're not gonna run with him are we?

- No, we'll all start together though won't we?

- [Cara] Yeah.

- I dunno, I reckon by mile two we woulda lost him.

- What am I gonna do about this hair?

- I dunno but you ain't gonna leave it like that surely?

- Well no I can't run with it like this.

- Just put it up in a high bun you'll be alright.

- D'you think, and it's not gonna fall?

I'm gonna have so much hair spray

so it's literally not gonna move, and loads of clips.

- Spray mine.

- And what we'll do is we'll take the hairspray with us.

- We need lip gloss because I don't wanna have sore lips.

What's more important, plasters, phone?

- I just think people at the pit stops are gonna

have plasters, they're not gonna have lip gloss.

End of the day. - Yeah.

- Straight after literally we're gonna be done.

We're gonna have a wash and go to the party.

- We ain't gonna be able to fit our high heels on!

Our feet are gonna be like sausages.

- Anyway I've got something for you.

- I'm excited.

- Basically we're running this together

and it sort of like there wouldn't be anyone else

that I'd wanna run it with.

So I've got you a little good luck charm.

- Aw Car.

- Did you me anything?

- No, I got you plasters for your nipples, that was caring.

- There you go.

- Aw thank you.

- We've got matching.

- I love you. - I love you.

- I'll tell you what, the shape is not that bad,

- The shape's not that bad. - Nice neck,

you can see some shoulders now.

It's just these fucking love handles

are an absolute fucker, they will not go.

- Well I'm not surprised stickin' that full English down ya

they will never go.

Well it's definitely gonna take bigger ones than that mate

that don't even cover half your nipple.

- Yes it does, two on each.

Mate I'm so nervous you don't understand,

- Are ya?

- Yeah cos I feel like you know

it's all eyes on me this year

and it's just a lot of pressure.

No one thinks I'll do it.

- I think you'll do it, personally.

- I'm not even worried about that

I'm not even worried about what time I get,

I'm not even worried about crossing the line,

I'm just worried about having nipples at the end of the race

and having toenails.

- Have you got support coming down?

- Yeah I've got loads of support!

Obviously all the boys are coming.

Joey Diags, Tom Kilby, Tom Pearce, obviously you

and the family and stuff but obviously you know

I heard Debbie and Lydia are coming as well.

But I mean probably you know,

Lydia's probably more here to support Billi and Cara

you know the amount of slagging off

and putting me down she's done recently.

- Right so when you cross the finish line,

d'you reckon she'll 'ave a little eye on ya?

- Um, if she's there [laughs].

- You reckon?

- Yeah obviously but, all I'm thinking now mate

is marathon marathon marathon.

I can still do this as well which I'm quite happy about.

[laughs]

- Oh my god you actually can do that, how'd you do that?

- I thought they'd gone but there's still a bit there.

- Right, vas yourself up and I will do.

- Absolutely useless. You was supposed to be helping me out.

- I am helping you out. [both laugh]

- Tell you what else chaffs up.

- Go on.

- Right down here son. [both laugh]

- That's exactly the reason why

I wasn't running the marathon.

- It's a fucker I'll tell ya.

- And there's another place

where they don't expect ya to go. [laughs]

- Let's go! [laughs]

- [Joan] Hello

- You alright Mum?

- I'm feelin' a bit tired today, surgeon come round

and he said to me if an atom bomb dropped

on the Rock of Gibraltar all them rocks

were in your gallbladder.

- Oh your joking, how long till you're home?

- Think it might be a couple more days yet.

- God, I wish you was at my fashion show the other day.

It went really well.

- Oh did it?

- And then right at the end of the night

I had a bit of a turn out.

- Who with?

- You know that Ricky Rayment?

- Yeah.

- Me an him been texting, it's a bit, you know,

bit of a flirtation but no more than that.

He came up to me, wouldn't let me get a word in edgeways

and was insinuating that my texts were inappropriate

and he wanted nothing to do with it.

- Yeah.

- An I'm thinking, you little snake, at the end of the day,

surely in your thick skull,

you know it's just a bit of friendly banter.

- He's just a boy Gemma, take no notice of him.

He's just a boy.

- Exactly, you know what Essex is like

for bloody rumours and gossip.

I wanna get to Charlie before it gets to Charlie.

You know what I mean,

so that's the drama I've got at the minute.

- Yeah, just be a free spirit floating about.

- Can you get any psychic vibes

whilst you're in the hospital, do some cards or something?

- Use your intuition, you will not fail.

- I'm just a bit uh, a little bit nervous!

- About what?

- Mate you must be shittin' yourself.

- I dunno like, I just look around

and you can't even see the finish line.

- It's 26 miles away mate.

- That's when you know it's a mission.

- It's a fair old distance you've gotta travel mate,

trust me.

- We made you a banner, we made you a banner, hold on.

- [laughs] Stop running, start reaming!

It don't even say my name on it!

- Yeah I know I'll do it later. [all laugh]

- Put it down now, roll it up.

- But for now Arg listen, I've made you a present.

- What?

- It's a hat yeah [all laugh] mate

people will notice you in this, put it on!

- There's no way I'm wearing that man!

- Put it on, put it on. [all laugh]

- Mate that's perfect!

- Cheers Joe!

- It is a souvenir though innit.

- What sort of music you got to listen to Arg?

- I'm gonna listen to a bit of Justin Bieber.

- You need some upbeat tunes.

- One Direction and the one and only Will Young.

- Yeah buddy.

- We believe in Arg!

- If I stop and need a wee

your gonna have to stop with me ain't ya?

- No, of course I ain't.

- Well I can't go wee and you keep running.

- We're supposed to hold it.

- All right so if I gotta wee you gonna stop?

- You've had a spray tan and everything ain't ya?

- We've had a spray, and my lip gloss is here.

- Most glam girls ever, lip gloss here?

- Yeah and I got my phone in here.

- We're gonna make you aware of where we are by ringing you.

We can run and text, we've tried that in training.

- So are you gonna like follow us around

at all different points?

- Yeah no I'll follow you.

- You're awesome.

- We've got our little thing.

- Yeah but hold on a minute

I've just seen that you've got a banner for Arg.

- It's for everyone.

- Did you make one for us?

- It's part of it.

- Did you make Billi will you marry me?

- Can you imaging the most cringiest way to marry someone?

- I think that would be quite nice.

- I'm rooting for you to finish that's all I'm rooting for.

- As long as we beat Arg then that's all I care about,

he's gonna beat us though I reckon now.

- Anyone seen the girls?

- Well I don't know I think the girls are here

but Lydia I don't thinks coming

'cause I think her and Arg have a bit of a row but I reckon

she might be at the finish line.

- [Billi] She'll be at the finish line I reckon

she's been really supportive to us hasn't she?

- Yeah she's been really good, sheer awesome.

- Come here, good luck!

- Bye!

- See you later Arg! Where's Arg?

- Anyone seen Arg?

- Anyone seen Arg?

- Anyone seen Arg? [all laugh]

- Do you know what I still can't get over my ex

asking for the bag back.

- Oh my God I know what is that all about.

- I don't know what justifies giving a present back

but it's not like I cheated or done anything really bad

you know what I mean I put the TV on the wall

so he wants the TV back I said okay fine you win

and I want the diamond cross back I got you and I was just

being like isn't that like a sentimental present

that you buy someone so I just put it on Twitter

like messing about saying

I can't believe you asked for the bag back

and then Joey texts me saying

"I've seen your Twitter I hope your all right

just give it all back I'll replace it for you"

I was like oh bless him.

- I think to be honest Joey's never really gotten over

youse two from when you split up

I think that he's always kind of still loved you

he's not fallen out of love with you

so you just be careful of his feelings.

- Yeah.

- But at the same time I think you've both got history

you've both been together just have a bit of fun.

- I wonder how Arg's getting on at the marathon?

- God. I really hope he does do it

but I think he's gonna find it so hard.

[big band music]

- 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, go! [whistle]

[acoustic guitar music]

[automatic car door locks]

[doorbell]

- Thanks for coming.

- Cheers.

[upbeat music]

- How many camel toes do you reckon we've seen

in the last half hour?

- Loads.

- Oh my God there's so many sorry potatoes here

it's like a field of potatoes out there.

- You all right?

- You all right hon?

- I cannot believe people are doing this Lucy.

- I know!

- We should maybe try and do it next year?

- But they look so tired, you reckon Arg will finish?

- Yeah I definitely think he'll finish.

He's trained so hard for it int he.

- Aw Lyd, I've heard something.

- What?

- I've heard he said if he finishes,

that he wants to come over to you and ask you back out.

- I don't think that's gonna happen either Luce.

Arg literally hates me, and it's so sad

and it really really makes me upset.

- What, why what happened?

- Like, he's heard that I was seeing someone else

and just when we started getting on.

- But you weren't though?

- Well I was.

- I think today is not about arguing,

look it's a beautiful day,

so lets just look out for Billi, Cara and James.

[techno music]

- Where is he?

Has he got his hat on?

- No that's come off that is.

- A bottle of beer is actually beaten Arg.

- How can a pint be beating Arg?

- And also a strawberry's beaten Arg, go on you strawberry.

- Oh my God there's a camel.

- A camel.

- A camel has beaten Arg.

- Arg!

- Nice cuppa tea for you babe.

- Lovely, I could do with one of them.

- You love your tea don't you.

- I do love a cup of tea.

- Uh I'm knackered.

- So what's been happening?

I haven't seen you since the launch?

- Nah I know it was hectic weren't it, did you enjoy it?

- Everyone was loving you strutting your stuff weren't they.

- Oh it was so funny, but I'm a bit fucked off actually.

- Why?

- Because you know like me and Ricky have always been mates,

like only ever pure banter, never like anything dodgy in it.

- Yeah.

- And recently we've been like texting each other

but nothing meant by it, just like, little bit flirty but

nothing meant by it because Ricky's always up

for joke and a banter.

- What were you sending him the messages Gem?

- Just like nothing bad so don't worry about it,

there's no need to get funny about it.

- I ain't getting funny about it.

- There's no need to get funny

'cause you've been with us when I've spoke to Ricky.

Like he'd text me sayin' "Alright badger."

- It's a northern saying innit,

"I'm game like a badger mate."

- Is it?

- Yeah, game like a badger.

- I've never been up north so I wouldn't know anything,

- That's what it is, like I'm game mate.

- I've never heard of that sayin'.

- Have you got the messages, let me 'ave a look at 'em

and we can 'ave a look at 'em together.

Let's 'ave a look, lets 'ave a look at 'em.

- Have you seen him on the telly yet?

- No, nan there's like millions of people running.

- I know but now and again you might get a flash of him.

- No.

- You know 'cause sometimes you can.

- I haven't seen him yet

I wonder if he's gonna be in a fit state

for this party later cause knowing him

he won't be able to walk for a week.

- Is Ricky going?

- I think so yeah guess whose been sexting Ricky?

- Whose been what?

- Sexting.

- What's that?

- Well it's basically when people write sex text messages

sexting.

- Yeah.

- Yeah, do you guess who?

- No.

- Gemma.

- Stop it.

- She has she's been sending him rude messages

saying about how she can be wild in hotel rooms

well I think the case is she's not getting it from Charlie

so she needs to get it from somewhere else

and Ricky's the victim.

- No, surely not.

- Well Charlie's not giving it to her is he?

- Does he know what he's got it for though?

- What do you mean?

- Surely he can do something with it.

- Nan!

- Well there you are that's what he's got to do

hasn't he I mean he's got a real pair here

only one way or another.

- He's obviously not ready is he yet?

- Oh dear isn't a life with all this sex business .

- Right I put I'm game as a badger too

let's go out and go wild

my interpretation of going wild is going up Brentwood

going up Sugarhut and havin' a few drinks.

I dunno what his interpretation is.

I was like, "What you doin' tonight? I'm in Wales, not far,

why don't you come to my hotel later," I was there with my

family, again, if I was being tricky, why would I invite a

friend to a hotel where my family are gonna be?

- You're kind of giving him, you're fueling it a little bit

your own self, which kind of makes me think that there is

a little bit of you that kind of is a bit like,

lets get cheeky with 'im lets kind of have a bit of banter

with 'im and see where it could go, lets see where he

actually puts his money where his mouth is,

then what would you do if he actually came?

I ain't happy about it if I'm honest.

- Right.

- With regards to like, you and me.

Why we're here and that we're talking, [sighs]

I don't know how it's going but if I'm honest

I don't think it's going in the right direction.

- Everything you've wanted me to do in this relationship

Charlie I have done, so for you to turn round and say to me

you're not happy with the relationship's going, fuck off.

- You're unbelievable.

- Why am I unbelievable?

- Fuck off, 'cause it's not nice,

this is what I don't like about you.

- Well don't sit in my house sayin' to me

when I've done nothing to you.

I'm not happy with the way this relationship's going.

- Come on Gem, you've done nothing to me?

Putting it out there to all the other people

the girls the boys I'm an embarrassment with my dancing,

I'm humiliating, I'm having to stick up for you

and your sexuality you're tellin' the girls

that I haven't put it on you.

- But you ain't!

- No, I'm scared, I don't know what to dress like

because I'm worried that it might not look right.

I'm scared of the shoes I'm wearing

because the first pair of shoes you saw me in

made you wanna vomit.

- You asked me for my help,

"Gem, I wanna get some new clothes."

- Because I wasn't Essex enough,

because I wasn't swag enough, because I wasn't a gangster.

I didn't have tassels on my shoes, because my hair

wasn't combed over, and you know what, that ain't me.

- Okay.

- I haven't had sex with you because I wanted to treat you

like a lady, I've wanted just to get to know you and think

you know what that could come, let's not put pressure on it.

If I'm honest, I don't think there's sexual chemistry in

this relationship, I really don't.

We call it a day now we can be friends,

have a laugh together and just leave

the idea of a relationship and put it to bed.

- Brilliant.

- Yeah.

- Thank you, and let me tell you one thing.

- Yeah.

- We won't be friends 'cause I think

you 'ave actually tried to make a mug of me.

- Not at all.

- So go, we ain't gonna be friends.

- Your loss.

- It ain't my loss mate, it's your loss you fuckin' idiot.

- Jessie's nice, Jessie's a pretty girl

and you're sticking it on Gemma.

- If it was me and I was getting messages from Gemma,

I'd disregard it but you texting back,

"Oh, what you talking 'bout you nutter."

- Listen don't you start coming at me about messaging boy

I'm the player least I had one message yours was like 50.

- I don't get it then what's wrong with Gemma?

- She not your type?

- Her hair to long?

- It is that she's not my type.

- Have you told Charlie yet?

- I sort of wanted Gemma to tell him

do you know what I mean it's better coming from her really

it's not exactly nice is it.

- Thing is you realise she'll probably turn around to him

and be like it takes two to tango.

- Yeah but it's fine because I've got message as proof

and I'm pretty sure that she's deleted 'em

so if she's deleted her messages

and I've still got pictures of mine

she's obviously deleted 'em for a reason

'cause she's been clocked.

- Ring him up and see

how long until he's gonna be at Mile 21.

- Ain't answering his phone.

- There he is, come on Arg!

- Come on son!

- You alright boy.

- Go on mate keep going.

- Keep going you're doing so well mate.

- You can do it honestly.

- Cara!

- Cara!

- Where's Bill?

- She's just behind us,

she's just behind us like probably half a mile.

- I can't believe how good Cara looks!

- She looks amazing, she looks like

she's going out night clubbing!

- That's the first time

I've not seen Billi and Cara together ever!

- Bill!

- If it makes you feel better your make up looks perfect!

- You look perfect Billi.

- Keep going!

[cheering]

- Gemma's the last person in the world...

- Oh hello.

- Quack quack quack!

- You want some for the ducks, keep that for Frankie.

- Cheers guys yeah I appreciate the joke.

- I went on your signals.

- Yeah and I went on her signals.

- So now it looks like I can't pick up birds

which is even worse.

- You can pick strawberries though [laughs].

- You're such a knob.

- You're the knob, mate.

Who asks a girl to go strawberry picking?

- Mate.

- You could have been Brad Pitt and gone over to her

she still would have been like,

"Strawberry picking, seriously in April?"

- I think I should go on the internet

and look up some chat up lines and you boys come to my flat.

- No you don't have to have a chat up line

say look listen hi you all right, I'm Chris

you don't have to go "Hi do you wanna go out for tonight,"

just talk to them normally.

- So you're saying if I came over to you and was like,

"You're looking fresh."

- You're looking fresh what the fuck is that?

It's the fact that you smile whilst you do it.

Hi how you doing?

- Hi you're fresh you know that.

- You're possessed.

- I'm trying to get jiggy here I'm gonna look possessed.

- Trying to get jiggy, mate your a melt.

- I can smell something.

- Lovely.

- I like your Yorkshires they're nice and big.

- Thanks.

- God.

[cheers]

- There he is!

- Come on Arg.

[cheering]

[upbeat music]

Come on Argent!

- Let's go meet him at the finish line.

- How are you son?

- It's the best feeling in the world!

- Is it?

- Your nipples mate, your nipples?

- All I'm sayin' is,

there was a lot of stop offs for Vaseline

[all laugh], yeah a lot.

- Well done man.

- Tonight you'll see Argy butt naked

downing champagne do whatever you boys want!

- Why butt naked?

- I dunno I just thought about that, I dunno!

- That stinks like BO man [all laugh].

- I've got so much BO you wouldn't believe!

- I can't believe we've done it, do you ache?

- Oh my God, I can't believe we've just run the marathon.

- The way you was running I just thought this is it

she's done and I thought I have got to run and finish it.

- Oh my god definitely.

- That is why I ran off and left you.

- I'm so annoyed I finished one minute after Argent.

- I not once stopped to go to the toilet.

- Now I understand why that woman pissed herself running

'cause I swear I'd rather have pissed myself

than stopped and gone to toilet, great achievement though.

Uh, my arse hurts.

[techno music]

- Arg did six hours one minute, Cara come first

she did 5.45 and Billi came just behind Arg 6.02.

- So Cara won.

- Cara won, apparently Arg is in agony mate.

Literally at 21 miles Lucy said he was crying.

- So basically, I won the bet.

- You won the bet.

- So show me the reddies.

- Show you the reddies?

I ain't got no reddies but I've got some yellows.

- Have you?

- First thing you've won in ages mate.

- Knew my luck would change eventually! [all laugh]

- Don't you like hummus Pat?

- No thanks.

- You like that one?

- What is that tart?

- Tzatziki isn't it?

- I don't like a lot of that anyhow it's too dry for me.

- It's nice.

- No, oh now.

- I might have that operation.

- The operation I told you about.

- Talking about this operation where your legs broken

and they stretch you're bones

makes you like three inches taller.

- I thought it was a foot?

- You'd be about five foot three wouldn't ya?

- I'd be taller than you.

- It's an operation it's not a miracle.

- Mate, it's gonna be well awkward tonight.

- Don't say anything, write it off.

[cheers]

- Lets party!

- The only thing that I was put out about is because

obviously everyone around us is going

"Oh, Ricky's texting another girl."

- Yeah.

- And at first, like I just felt mugged off

and I felt like the one person out of all of us

'cause I know that you have got my back

and we are really good friends.

I was disappointed that it was you.

- Charlie's actually dumped me over the text messages.

- Well.

- And, at the minute I feel embarrassed,

I feel like a dog really that's broke it's leg

and wants to go into a corner and lick it's wounds.

You know, I am 31 now, I do wanna settle down,

I do wanna have kids.

And it was just a bit of friendly banter

and being 100% honest with you, I was flattered.

- Yeah, Charlie didn't give you the attention you wanted,

which you thought he mighta done, and you was seeking it

elsewhere and unfortunately that was with Ricky.

But, yeah me and him have become a little bit

more than what we were.

He'll message me at like 4 in the morning.

I'll be asleep, he'll just been out and he'll be like

a heart like on BBM and then heart you, like love you.

- Jess that is lovely.

- And when you wake up you're gonna see this.

And I wake up and I'm like you absolute melt

messaging me that when you're drunk

and he's like I do though and I'm like shut up.

- Don't mock it, what you've got is what I want in my

relationship when I meet someone,

so please grab it with both hands because now I'm scared

of being on my own again and that's my problem and my issue.

- Girls done well today didn't they with the marathon.

- They were wicked man,

they've just snuck off now they haven't they.

- They didn't say bye?

- No, that's the thing.

- So how come you didn't go with Bill?

- I dunno, it's just awkward man, I dunno.

- I can tell that something's not right.

- I've obviously spoke to her on the phone

and that for a couple of hours just about everything

and she sort of indicated to me

that she will always put my sister first before me.

- Don't worry about it Tom.

- I know.

- If she's serious about the relationship with you

then she's gotta be like well yeah

I'm best mates with your sister but.

- Yeah course, but then I think on my side

I'm being selfish, I don't wanna go on,

holding onto something that never properly gonna be mine.

You know what I mean like, it's so hard man, so hard.

- Tell her how you feel about her, tell her

how much she means to ya, and say

if you're gonna put my sister before me

then it's not gonna work out.

If you're not gonna say that then you've gotta

break it off with her.

- I can't believe I've completed the London marathon.

- You've done so well, trust me mate, you've done so well.

- Literally like you gotta remember six weeks ago

I was 18 stone, I am now officially an athlete [laughs].

Arg the athlete, can you believe it?

- I wouldn't go as far as to say you're an athlete.

- I'm an athlete, course I'm an athlete,

now this marathon's over we are gonna go out, get smashed,

there's gonna be... all I'm sayin' is lock up your daughters

'cause Arg is back [laughs].

- Honestly, hand on my heart

don't think I've done anything wrong

and I'm so like sad that it's come to this.

I've heard that he's been with girls,

like he boasts about it to people.

About how many girls that he's been with and whatever.

- Yeah he has hasn't he.

- That's his way of moving on and if he wants to,

if he wants to get with loads of girls and things like that

then that's his decision and then, we'd just started

like talking again as friends and I feel like

because if he knew that he kind of had that in with me

and we were friends again, I think he thought like he could

control me again and make me feel really shit again

like he always used to do and he'd text me these messages

Lucy and I've never ever felt so shit in my life.

All the names and stuff that he calls me like he constantly

- So he's calling you names and stuff

just 'cause you've gone out on a couple of dates?

- Slut, slag, and no matter how many times I tell him

I don't wanna be with him and I wanna move on

he'll never ever leave me alone.

And I just wanna move on, I don't wanna be with him.

- Someone needs to tell him other than you

like 'cause he just doesn't listen to you.

- I'll always have him there he'll always be at my house

'cause he's close with my family and he's always just there

and no matter who I talk to James will find out about it

and then make my life hell and turn them against me.

- He can't rule you're life Lyds he can't

this is him out of frustration 'cause he knows

you're moving on that's all it is

once he actually realises and it actually sinks in that

you're not his anymore he'll have to leave you alone.

- But that won't never happen I know it won't.

- If someone needs to him I'm gonna tell him

'cause it's out of order he can't keep pestering you

he can't being in your life 'cause it's not fair.

- We saw him at the 16 mile point just like briefly

he come up to me he started crying,

"Oh my God man Joe I'm so upset" he's like "I'm crying."

- What's the accent, what is Arg American?

- No but he went "I'm crying, man" and I was like Arg.

- What are you doing an American accent for?

- What I'm not actually English am I

I don't actually live here so emotional it was funny though.

I like your bow.

- Having a bad hair day today.

- Why?

- I just am girls get a bad hair day,

you must get bad hair day?

- Sometimes.

- You're hair looks better a bit shorter.

- It's not that short at the moment.

- No cause when I seen you a little while ago

it was like really like big on top.

- When we had a snog.

- Yeah.

- How comes you text me the other day saying

you wanted a cuddle.

- I didn't say I wanted one.

- You text me "I need a cuddle" with a little wink.

- Yeah having a laugh with you.

- I was going out with the boys, I said maybe another time.

You said yeah, you want to cuddle me now?

- Yeah.

- Bit of an awkward cuddle.

- You want a kiss as well don't ya?

- Pardon?

- You want a kiss, you want a snog?

- No.

- Why?

- It's too soon, you don't deserve one yet.

- Let me take you out one more time.

- What you wanna go on a date?

- I'll surprise ya.

- Don't put me on a bike with a helmet

and take me to a dump again.

- I ain't gonna do that again obviously

'cause I know you hated it, but it's gonna be

something adventurous, you might have to wear a helmet.

- Can't you just chose something

that you haven't gotta put a helmet on?

- What you think.

- Can't we do something where I put a nice,

something nice on.

- Name one adventurous thing where you don't

wear head gear on, there's nothing,

skateboarding, ice hockey.

- Skateboarding no, ice hockey no.

- It might involve head gear.

- I think just something romantic? [laughs]

- Did you see her?

- Yeah it's a bit of a sore subject.

- Is it? Why?

- I have just found out that Lydia had a one night stand

and she slept with someone my intentions always was that

when I'd run the marathon, I was gonna

ask Lydia out either on a date or just as friends

to catch up and obviously you know

that's not gonna happen now in a million years.

How can you respect someone who doesn't respect themselves?

You know, I must admit at the time I did send a couple of

abusive messages and you know it's been a bit uncomfortable.

- Do you regret sending 'em?

- Yeah I probably do but you know, it's the first time I've

ever thought to myself I'm better than Lydia

I can do better than her, and you know I'm not gonna let it

knock my confidence I still know that there somewhere out

there, there are decent girls, and I will end up with

someone nice I know I will.

[mellow rock music]

- Right you want another one?

- You know what Luce I just wanna go. [sigh]

- Alright then come on.

- Goodbye Lydia.

- [Narrator] Next time, on The Only Way Is Essex.

Will Billi and Tom go the distance?

- You think you'll make Billi will you marry me?

- She'll always put my sister first before me.

- Then you've got to break it off with her.

- [Narrator] Will Sam get to grips with Joey's helmet?

- But it might involve head gear.

- Can't you just choose something

where you haven't got to put a helmet on?

- [Narrator] And anyone seen Arg?

- Put it on that's perfect.

- [Narrator] Who knows?

These people are real and anything can happen

on The Only Way Is Essex.