Original subtitles

Calm yourself, Highness. Calm yourself.

Do you realize what would happen if one of his sons would come and take over?

Thrush will be thrown out of Bruegelgratz.

Everything he and I have worked for, gone.

Highness, Highness, you will take your brother's place.

Thrush is arranging accidental deaths for your nephews.

They are sending a man who... Then where is this man?

Do not be angry, my darling.

You wait here and look sad, eh?

I will be back but in a few minutes.

Come in.

When I do return, I will take you to the jewelry store, eh?

Now we can talk.

This is the man Thrush has sent.

Allow me to present Dr. Igor Gork.

Karen.

Is he dead yet?

He is on his way.

He will arrange accidental deaths for your nephews.

If he can keep his mind on his work long enough.

Let me warn you, Dr.

Goff. I have heard all about you.

So, if you please remember, you are not now in Paris or London

romancing innocent girls.

But, Your Highness, it is just light entertainment.

Light entertainment, indeed.

There will be none of this on this assignment. None.

But for those ugly little things you put in my vases.

Jamming devices, your highness.

If there should be anyone trying to eavesdrop, all they will hear will be

buzz.

They're using a jamming device, no doubt.

However, we've been in touch with Prince Nikolai. He's extremely anti -thrush,

as you know.

He's driving into Drubregat's at the moment.

It's maybe him coming now.

Nice to see you, Prince Nikolai.

You still don't know what made it collapse.

All right.

Well, the problem now is how to protect the late Prince Nikolai's brother,

Prince Ephraim.

Miss Dancer. Yes, sir.

As you're probably aware, Prince Ephraim is a great patron of rock and roll.

Oh, yes, he's quite famous at it.

He's staging a rock and roll festival at the Palace of Drubegratz.

So you'll go back to Drubegratz.

One of our contacts, a London booking agent, has arranged for you to be the

discotheque dancer at the festival.

I? Our records are that you... You know something about dancing?

Yes, but... As to you, Mr. Slate, we...

We'll outfit you with reviews and testimonials from various musical

extolling your proficiency on the French horn.

French horn?

Yes, you'll be different.

Weak weather.

Everyone else will be bringing guitar parts.

You will outfit yourself with one of those... One of those wigs.

Sir, unfortunately, I don't play the French horn.

This will give you sufficient cover to gain access to Prince Ephraim.

And his Aunt Rapunzel.

Excellent cover, sir, but unfortunately I don't play the French horn.

I think the wig should be a little moth -eaten.

Sir, he said he doesn't play the French horn.

Miss Dancer, I'm well aware of what Mr. Slate was saying.

So you don't play the French horn?

Well, improvise.

Where'd you get those crazy pipes?

Oh, it's a French horn, actually.

Oh.

Do you play with one hand?

Can you dance with one leg?

I used to dance and play the guitar at the same time.

Do you know the Daily Flash?

Yes, often.

I came here to work with them.

I hoped.

They're out of sight.

Oh, really?

That's why I'm so low at this moment.

Yes, you do seem a bit close -mouthed.

I do, don't I?

That's because it wouldn't have mattered if I broke my foot or not.

They already have a go -go girl.

Wonderful girl. Never knew she existed until yesterday. She just came in and

took over.

Just came in and took over?

What do you mean?

You mean you don't know who she is?

Where did she come from?

Teddy Southkirk, the booking agent. He sent her over.

Are you sure she has had no previous experience?

None.

My aunt is trying to interest me in a Bulgarian songwriter.

Bulgarian? His name is Dr. Igor Gork.

You ever hear of him?

No.

Nobody has.

Your Highness.

Dr. Gork.

I wish to use your radio.

Look, but don't touch.

Hello. Hello, I wish to speak to London, please.

Yes, London, please run check on Mr.

Selcuk, the booking agent. I will wait.

Yes.

Yes.

Mr. Selcuk is uncle contact in London.

Thank you very much.

This girl, she is agent for uncle. I want her response immediately.

My dear princess.

We do not have time for side accident.

She will be dancing at the festival.

And in that case, our problem is solved.

It pains me to say this, but she, with your nephew, will die Saturday night.

Poor little pigeon.

Poor little pigeon, indeed.

A man of your attainments, your genius, and all you can think of as the poor

little pigeons?

You should learn to appreciate the mature beauty of the older,

more intelligent woman.

I'm in my room in the palace, sir. I can't talk for too long.

Your inquiry concerning Dr.

Gock? Yes.

He's no songwriter.

He's a notorious thrush scientist.

Dr. Igor Gock. But he's writing songs for the Daily Fly.

The obituaries would be more in his line, I think.

My guess is that...

Prince Ephraim is about to meet with his accident.

Gentlemen, Your Highness, this is the way we are going to cause the accident.

First of all, this is a multiple resonance detonator.

Now...

This

is matter.

In every little piece of matter there are...

small, moving atoms, they have a rhythm, which we call resonance.

The detonator will measure the resonance, and because resonance is

will register on the piano as a tune.

The detonator will intensify the rhythm. The atoms will dance madly,

and boom!

This piece of matter will shatter like the bridge at Drupalgrass.

Excellent, Dr. Quark, excellent.

Continue, please.

This is the mountain, the glacier.

Here is the palace. In the corner, the laboratory.

We will be here, in the safe zone.

We will plant loudspeakers.

Around the glacier, the piano will record its rhetoric, its tune.

Upon this tune, we will build a little song.

On the night of the festival, the orchestra, the daily flashes, will sing

little song.

We will pipe the daily flashes back into the laboratory, from here to the

loudspeakers, to the glacier around the mountain, causing an intensified

vibration result.

Eighty million tons of ice and snow will fall upon your unfortunate nephew.

Bravo, bravo, bravo.

Crushing the palace like an egg shell.

Oh, well, it needs redecorating anyway.

Come, doctor, stop twaddling. It is time to give the daily plushes its own.

I am not twaddling. It is a very big glacier.

Oh, and what a beautiful glacier.

It is my beautiful glacier.

What a shame to destroy it.

I want you to liquidate her. Get rid of her. Get rid of her.

Get me Station Y.

This is Station G.

Come in, Station G.

There is an uncle agent.

A ravishing little pigeon.

She has beautiful eyes, a pixie little nose.

She's right below you.

Yes. She's spying.

Well. Liquidate her.

Disposal completed.

Young lady's body now at bottom of cliff.

Bottom of a cliff?

How is she?

How is she?

How is your great -grandmother?

Dead, perished.

She was so pretty, too.

Come, we have work to do.

I play the guitar and you do the wiggling. No, no. You play the guitar

do the wiggling. No, you play the French horn and I'll do the wiggling. And

we'll call ourselves the Broken Bones.

What's that sound?

Excuse me.

Is that your heart?

Well, don't get so excited. We haven't got it yet.

Please.

Don't follow me.

Make it fast, April.

Mark!

Where are you talking from, underwater?

I've just been thrown off a cliff.

Now, say that slowly.

Who threw you over what cliff?

Two Tyrolean mountaineers.

They were carrying electronic equipment.

Is that par for Tyroleans?

Not if they throw you over a cliff.

There were some loudspeakers at the side of the hill.

Loudspeakers? Yeah, what do you think?

I think they're planning something a little bigger than just an accident for

Ephraim. Right.

I've got company. I'd better call you back.

You talk to yourself?

Only when I'm alone.

The glacier is so big.

The tune is not coming in fast enough.

That is the tune. We should come in like a dance, with rhythm.

That's it.

We got it. It's coming.

The question is, will it be coming in time?

The important thing is the detonator. The battery is working.

What matters, what time it comes in.

We can always throw your nephew over the cliff, too, no?

Oh, certainly.

Murder? Never.

Now, please.

Never discuss such things in my presence.

I am a princess.

And like Caesar's wife, it is necessary I always be above any suspicion.

Of course, it would be great help to me and to Thrush. Also, if I have Prince

Consort like the Queen of England.

A husband who enhance my dignity. A man of distinction, a man of science, a man

of learning.

Tell me something, Igor.

Have you ever thought of getting married?

I am married to my saints, Mother Highness.

Besides, can I aspire the hand of a princess?

What am I?

Let alone Bulgarian.

Yes, but with a multiple resonance detonator. Igor, if it is possible for

you to bring down Glacier...

Why not Moscow?

Why not the moon?

Why me?

Why not you and I together, Igor, taking over the universe?

That's it.

The sound of the glacier.

What is it? What is it? The tune.

Yes.

It is the sound of the glacier. My Bulgarian baby.

Tell the men to collect the loudspeakers.

Ha -ha! Ah, the sound of the glacier!

Ha -ha! Ma!

Igor! A Bavarian baby!

Igor, did you hear the words I say to you, Igor? Igor!

Where do you see?

A princess friend!

A princess friend! I hate you so!

La -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la

-la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la

-la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la -la.

Yes, sir, electronic equipment.

And Mark found loudspeakers at the base of the mountain.

Loudspeakers, eh?

Where is Mr. Slate? I don't know. I'm waiting for his call now.

We're analyzing samples from the Drubergatz Bridge, but I see nothing of

significance so far.

Loudspeakers. That's very strange.

Very.

I'm going to sneak around the far side of the palace and see just how many

are.

I'll call you as soon as I hear from Mark.

Gentlemen, your attention, please. The tempo will be in metronome 130.

G clef, of course.

Oy,

oy, oy, oy, my Bulgarian baby.

Oy, oy, oy, oy, my Bulgarian doll.

Oy, oy, oy, oy, my Bulgarian baby.

Oy, oy, oy, oy, I love you.

Make it for him.

Where did you find this wire head?

Do you like the tune?

I want you boys to play it Saturday night.

Hold it, lady. We're creative artists.

I want it as a wedding present for Igor.

We are getting married.

Married?

Did you say married?

He said something so astonishing about me getting married.

What music?

I wrote it.

Very pretty.

This is Dr.

Gork. And of course, you know, my aunt, the Princess Rapunzel.

A charm, my dear.

How very nice to see you again.

I wrote a song.

They are going to play it.

My Bulgarian Baby.

It is Dr. Gork's wedding song. You see, he and my aunt are getting married.

Who said...

I had to let our little secret out of its bag, darling. Oh, come, it's time to

go. You want the boys to have time to rehearse your little tune? Goodbye,

everybody.

Goodbye, everybody.

Man, what a barracuda.

I would like your eye, miss, to clear up a little, miss, on standing... Not in

front of the peasants.

We have more pressing matters.

This church is too dangerous.

We cannot wait. I want her extirpated tonight.

Arrange it. Yes, this will happen. Now, about the misunderstanding. Not in front

of the servants.

Oi, oi, oi, oi.

My Bulgarian baby.

Oi, oi, oi, oi.

My Bulgarian doll.

Oi, oi, oi, oi.

My Bulgarian baby.

Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, oi. I love you.

Well, that's it, Mr. Waverly.

The question is, why would a scientist like Dr.

Gork be writing songs with a daily flash?

An excellent question, Miss Dowson.

We'll have the song analyzed.

It may contain a clue.

Where's Mr. Slate?

I haven't the foggiest.

I have a visual teaser print.

Out. Out.

Your Highness.

Would you believe a vase?

A book?

An apple? Anything, something. Go, go. Here.

Here.

All right. All right. I will show you.

Slade? Where are you?

Ah, I'm in the palace kitchen.

I am not alone.

I'd better call you back.

The sound you are hearing is the rhythm inside the apple. The atoms will dance.

The apple will blow apart.

Unfortunately, the detonator cannot work precisely with such a small object as

the apple. But the glacier, the glacier, it is impossible to miss. It will fall

upon Prince Ephraim. Believe me.

Now, it may not be apple music entirely.

What else could it be?

A stray music.

Maybe the top of his head.

Wait a minute.

Yes? What are the chances?

I would say 98%. The top of my head or the apple?

I really don't know.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Hold! Now please don't move.

We are ready!

Incredible neat weight.

But it will not miss the glacier.

Take him downstairs.

Yep. Ah.

Am I allowed a phone call?

It's awful, aren't they? Hmm?

A Bulgarian baby.

A Bulgarian doll.

A Bulgarian baby.

I love you.

What am I doing here?

Tomorrow night is the festival.

To keep up adherence.

And by the day I want my engagement ring.

Engagement ring? Of course.

From ask me about it, when I came in, I was utterly embarrassed. Imagine being

engaged and no ring.

April here.

This is Mr. Waverly here.

I'm at Drubergrat's headquarters.

I can't talk, sir. I'm in the middle of rehearsing.

Dr. Gork and the princess are here.

We've analyzed a piece of the Drubergatz bridge.

It shows internal destruction.

The thong you sent us may have some bearing.

It seems possible that a resonant intensifier was used.

Resonant? You mean to make something collapse?

Precisely. Well, you may be right, sir. Mark saw some electronic equipment.

I'll call.

I get no answers, sir.

I'll keep trying.

speak to Mark?

Mark? He left me alone on the terrace of the ski lodge, and I would like to tell

him myself exactly what I think. And don't say he's not here because I saw

come in.

Oh, Mark, you're bold once you've stepped in.

April's gone. Huh?

Oh, she'll be back. I hope so.

many people do you think you can get in here?

How many sardines go in a can?

Very funny. Ha ha. Where do the cops hear about this? This is kidnapping.

How long have we been in here? I'm starving.

Oh, the gag.

Oh.

Oh.

Now, listen.

You turn around.

I'll undo your hands and you undo mine. Okay. All right?

Have I got it?

Yes. Good.

Hey, crazy.

What are you, secret agents or something?

Not something, period.

You mean secret agents like secret agents?

Couldn't we change the subject?

What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?

Festival, it's starting.

Oh, don't worry. I've got out of situations worse than this before.

I don't care what Her Highness says. I want them dead before we take them down

to the stage.

Oh, the whole place is blown up.

That one's only a noise capsule.

This one sounds like an atom bomb.

We'd better get out of here before they find out they're stealing one piece.

What about Dr. Gork's machine?

Upstairs. The daily flash hasn't started seeing Bulgarian babies yet, so we

might have time to warn them.

Follow me.

Come on.

No, wait.

Contact with laboratory established.

Contact established.

Contact is established.

Loudspeaker detail reporting.

Are the loudspeakers connected?

All connected.

Disconnect. Disconnect.

Hold back for intensification.

Check test.

Check test.

flash. Let's go.

This is crazy. Is he somebody with a mountain?

I'm terribly sorry, gentlemen. Believe me.

Oh, they're only asleep. Come on.

bye for my Bulgarian

We're busting up the joint.

Coming over backwards.

Sorry. Oh, excuse me.

Of course, they would make rotten publicity if the real story ever came

Now, April, darling, would you explain that again?

You know, Howard was supposed to do it the one way, but then did it the other.

As we have already explained, the atomic rhythm was

intensified, but due to the direction...

of the impulses, the whole thing went counterclockwise.

Is that right?

Oh, perfect.

Perfectly, yes, sir. Continue.

Yes.

Can you explain the rest, sir?

Well, we can always send the Prince a memo.

The important thing is the reputation of these flashing dailies.

Daily flash, sir.

Yes, the group brought down the glacier.

I doubt if we could make anyone think they didn't.