Original subtitles

Done.

Yeah, because you had the easiest job.

Come on, Chaos. It's just a hairbrush.

Relax.

We just need a little bit of fur.

Excellent work, Spooky Crew.

Ugh!

This should be enough spooky material to cover the variety

of optical devices I intend to introduce into the portal.

So we can see what's going on up there?

And figure out why the rest of the Spookies don't want to go home.

Exactly. And this spooky matter should protect our spying equipment

when we put it through the portal.

Good thinking, Xena.

Look out, Fear Dimension!

We're coming for ya!

SPOOKY GRUMBLES

Bert, can you grab that box, please?

So many nappies!

Ew! Gross.

What's going on? Is it Peanut Day?

Looks like it might be.

Aw, you're going to have a baby in the house! So exciting.

Alert, alert! There's a baby on the way.

SQUEALS Oh, man.

Even FIL cares about babies now!

We know, FIL. We're on it.

I see. You are absolutely certain you're across the arrival

of a teeny tiny life form,

about to throw your very existence into chaos.

Stop rubbing it in, FIL.

Now, come on, Spooky Crew.

Let's go look into the portal.

Not you, Bert.

We're on supportive offspring duties.

We'll join you for camp, OK?

Come on, Bertie.

What's gotten into you all of a sudden?

SQUELCHY FARTS

BERT SNIFFS

Mm-hm-mm.

Ba ba!

GROWLS

GROANING Is it happening?

Uh, looks like today's the day.

SQUEALS

Does it hurt? No.

It's just a little intense.

The hospital said to give it some more time before we head in.

How long will you be gone?

Not sure, mate. Babies don't tend to arrive on schedule.

Who will take care of us?

Well, Grandma's trying to change her flight,

but hopefully you two should be OK.

Yeah, we'll be fine.

Hey, you're about to be a big brother. Start acting like it.

You can't leave us here on our own.

What if a big scary monster comes and attacks us?

We can handle big, scary monsters.

Mama Bear, don't leave us by ourselves.

All right, all right. I'll see who else is around.

OK?

It's short notice, but there's got to be a baby-sitter around.

PHONE BEEPS, TOILET FLUSHES

Jon, Baby-sitters R Us is in business.

Boo-yah!

We saved Bowl-a-rama by watching TV and unlimited fridge access.

Yes! Yes, yes, yes!

Woo! Yo, yo!

So what do we need? Uh, I don't know.

Um, crayons.

Colouring in pencils.

Finger painting. What else do kids like?

Nunchuks? No, not after last time.

Action figures?

GASPS Ooh!

Ah, da, da, OK. OK, OK.

We let them look at them, but no unboxing.

Obviously. No unboxing. No unboxing. Gotcha.

Yeah.

Shotgun! Oh, God!

SNIFFS

Ugh, Bert, did you forget to flush again?

Ugh!

TOILET FLUSHES

SPOOKY GURGLES

SPOOKY MOANS

Ba ba!

Oh, no, no, no!

And finally, spooky fur binoculars.

If this test works, we put a camera through the portal.

Now we wait.

Fire in the hole!

Drat!

I was hopeful at least one of these would survive.

But alas, the portal destroys all earthly objects.

Danger, Backpack Jess.

The items become infused with the portal's energy

once they pass through.

That's how the portal opened in the first place.

Alas, we have failed.

There is no way for us to see into the great beyond.

There must be something else we can try.

I guess we're back to the proverbial drawing board.

How are we meant to see inside the portal

if we can't get a camera through?

I wonder if Chaos would be amenable to a more extreme camera...

Whoa!

This sucks.

We should be out there with the Spooky Crew.

Huh?

Mmm... Huh, picking a winner there, Sis?

GIGGLES Booger germs!

Ugh!

What are you doing?!

SCREAMS

Uh-oh. Her stink tingles.

Bill, have you been spookied?

Bill, have you been spookied?!

Bill, have you been spookied? Mum and dad cannot see this.

Bill, have you been spookied?!

Hey, Bill.

You want to race to your room? HE RETCHES

I bet I can beat you.

You wish!

Ugh!

DOOR SLAMS Ha-ha! Beat you.

You sure did.

Now that you're in there, maybe it's time for a little lie down.

Nuh-uh. Napping's for babies!

Not even a tiny little nap-nap?

Just a little bit of quiet time?

Everything OK, kids?

Yep. Um, Billie's just helping me with a...

LOUD BANG No nap-nap. No quiet!

No nap-nap. No quiet.

..science project. SCREAMS AND BANGING

No! About nap-naps.

OK.

BANGING AT DOOR Bert! Hello!

This is Billie's.

I know, but peeps keep telling me that I need to lift my game,

you know, since Peanut's coming and all.

I'm all aboard that big brother responsibility train.

Ha. Choo-choo!

So I'll take this for her...

Ed, I'm just going to take a quick bath before we go.

My back is killing me.

I'll grab you a fresh towel.

And I've got this, big guy. So, um...

BILLIE SHOUTS Bert!

..back to that, uh, science project.

DOOR SLAMS

Oof! What's that smell?

Ba ba!

SPOOKY GIGGLES

By the goddess Theia.

Fascinating.

After coming back from the Spooky Dimension,

it seems the binoculars now render spooky material invisible.

Is that good?

Well, we still don't know why the Spookies won't go home.

But while one problem remains unresolved,

another one may now have an answer.

AARRGH!

Ed!

ED HUMS

Have you got the towel?

Forgot. Right.

OK, well, get the car packed. After the bath...

ED GIGGLES ..it's hospital.

HE WHINES

What?

WHINES NONSENSICALLY

Bath's already running, Mama Bear.

You go have a nice long soak.

Me and Ed can take care of everything else.

OK...

OK, Ed, we need to move.

I don't wanna!

I don't wanna go!

We don't have time for this.

You're the responsible one.

I don't wanna!

Mum needs you!

Peanut needs you.

I'm hungry!

What are you doing here?!

I told you to stay in your room and have a nap.

I got bored!

I'm bored.

I'm hungry. I'm hungry.

Hello?!

Jane needs our help.

Your wife!

I want to watch TV.

This is my favourite TV show in the whole world.

No way!

Nah.

TV SWITCHES OFF

Why are you being so mean?

That's it, Mr.

Time out! ED WHINES AND GRUMBLES

ED SOBS

Can't believe that actually worked.

Baby Spooky!

So that's what FIL meant!

Gotcha!

WET SPLAT

Oh, sorry, little dude. Didn't mean to scare you.

BABY SPOOKY FARTS

Ugh! That smells worse than Wednesday after Taco Tuesday.

Uh-oh.

The train's leaving the station!

By the power of Bert speaks,

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!

I swear I'm not going to hurt you.

BABY SPOOKY STRAINS, FARTS

Don't touch my stuff. I'm going to dob on you!

No, no, no! It's my stuff. I need back up.

I just need a small sample of portal plasma.

Warning! Warning! You are dangerously close

to the portal's gravitational field. PHONE RINGS

'Sup, Bert? You a big brother yet?

No, but there's a Spooky!

Yes, that is what I said.

You said baby. Baby Spooky.

I assumed the "Spooky" part was obvious, since that is my job.

Guys, someone needs to bring me the Spooky Detector.

You go. I got this.

Just hold it steady, yeah?

I got you, Xene.

May I suggest a heavier anchor?

This is trickier than I had imagined.

DETECTOR BEEPS

Watch it! You're getting your fingerprints all over the box!

I am not.

Hey! Yo, yo, yo!

Sporty Spice, what are you... What are you doing here?

Yeah, kid, you're not cutting in on our baby-sitting gig, are you?

Oh, no. I'm just here as a supportive friend.

SCOFFS Ri-i-ight!

Uh, I better let you two unload your toys.

Action figures!

OK. Sorry.

That's OK. Common mistake. BABY SPOOKY GURGLES

Kids, man.

BABY SPOOKY BLAST

OK. Safe lift. Safe lift.

Hang on. Jon.

No, you've got to...like this. Legs...

Squeeze your butt. I'm squeezing my butt.

Aargh! I don't think I can get it. Stop.

I want raspberry!

You get what you get, you don't get upset.

Aww! Raspberry! Ed!

Come on.

Pew, pew, pew! Finally!

Pew, pew! Not you too!

Ha-ha! You can't reach.

Come on, man, I need it to catch the Spooky. Please!

Na, na, na-na, na!

Move it, kiddo! Out of the way, kids! Move it!

John, there's three kids.

We should charge quadruple.

World's best baby-sitters at your service.

Yeah, we've already patented the name. Totally.

Ah, well, Jon... GLASS SMASHES

..looks like everything is under control here. Yeah.

Totes. Should we go out back and see if they've got any Cheesy Num Noms?

I'm so in for the Cheesy Num Noms.

This is getting out of control.

This Spooky needs to be stopped.

This is easy.

Just a bit closer.

That is not advised.

BABY SPOOKY GURGLES

Ba ba!

This could be the answer.

Ooh!

Ba ba! Ha, ha, ha!

Xena, we've got company.

SQUELCHY FART

No offence, but you really need a bath.

Woo!

This is bad. Very bad.

Xena? Do you read me, Xena?

Come on, Baby Spooky, dude.

I know you're here somewhere.

Who wants a wheelbarrow ride?

DETECTOR BEEPS

Found you!

Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

GIGGLES

You like that?

SPOOKY LAUGHS Peek a boo!

Peek a boo! LAUGHTER

Peek a boo!

Hey, where'd you go?!

No! Come back here!

Don't you go over there.

LAUGHTER AND CLATTERS

Yeah! Woohoo!

CHAOTIC SHOUTING AND LAUGHTER

Hey, hey!

Got the Johns, too!

You did not. Did too times a million bazillion!

Maybe.

Waargh! CRASH

What was that?

Nothing, Mama Bear. It's OK.

I need to do a wee wee!

Will you wait outside the door?

Teeny bit busy right now, Edster.

Oh, but I'm busting-ah!

I'm going to go in my pants-ah!

Shabooley!

I think I know what this Spooky wants.

Almost there.

Just a little further.

Success! Portal juice extraction comple...AARGH!

Backpack Jess!

I'm being sucked into the portal!

JESS GURGLES

You have entered the portal's gravitational field.

The rope! Backpack Jess!

BABY SPOOKY GRUMBLES

Rargh! FARTS

Hey! No need for a meltdown.

Gravitational pull approaching point of no return.

Code red.

Backpack Jess! What are you doing?

Look what Uncle Bert's got for you.

Is this what you want?

A nice clean nappy?

How bad can this be?

WET SQUELCHES

HE RETCHES

Right.

Nappy time.

GIGGLES

FARTS LOUDLY

Toddler time is over. Hope this works.

Oh!

Hold on!

Get back down here, Xena!

Keep going!

THEY PANT

That was close. But we did it, Xene.

NO-O-O-O-O-OO!

What on earth happened in here?!

Is this your idea of baby-sitting?

No. No.

It's in mint condition.

It's perfect. Nothing happened.

Look, I'm not sure about leaving you with the Johns.

I mean, I knew they were immature... Don't sweat it, Ed.

Me and Bill will keep it on.

I heard a lot of carry on. Is everything OK?

Yep. Everything's all under control, right, Ed?

Yeah. Under control.

Huh! Ooft!

OK, let's get you to hospital. Oh, you've changed your tune.

Hmm? Never mind, never mind.

I just need to grab my bag.

From the lounge? No.

Here it is.

Uh, what happened to you?

We were making something for Peanut. It was Bert's idea.

Aw, guys, that's lovely.

Oo! Oh, OK. We should get going.

I'm so sorry, Xena.

I can't believe that you nearly got sucked into the portal

because of me. It's not your fault.

You were Spooky infected, and it was worth it for this.

How's that going to work?

Well, if portal energy can be used to make Spooky items invisible,

then perhaps that energy can be channelled to make them visible,

even after you're 13.

So, Spooky vision goggles?

That is the hope.

There better be some serious cleaning going on in there!

Sorry about your toys.

Action figures.

You know, there is an upside to the unpacking, right?

Pew, pew, pew! Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew!

Pew, pew... That is not how you play action figures.

It's like this.

Ooh! Wee! THEY GIGGLE

Wee! LAUGHTER

What's that? Nothing.

Hey, Billie.

Was it weird having to become a big sis when he'd never been one before?

A little.

I mean, I never had to look out for someone smaller than me.

It is a bit scary, but it's also pretty special too.

I wasn't sure I was ready to become a big bro either,

but If I can change a nappy full of Spooky poo,

I'm pretty sure I'm ready to step up into big bro territory.

Never doubted it for a second.

Hey, got someone who wants to meet you.

Wow.

Hey there, Sis.

So beautiful.

Say hello to Bobby Betty Bird.

Isn't that your mum's name? Betty?

Thank you.

Peek a boo! Peek a boo.

Peek a boo. There you are.

Look at you. You're a natural.

Even been practising how to change nappies.

How did you learn to do that?

I've got a lot of secret skills, Mama Bear.

And I can't wait to show you every single one of them, Peanut.

It tastes like an apple.

I see you have other apples... That's funny. Totally.

Should we count them all? Sure. Sounds fun.

OK. Let's go. How many...

FIL's log, 1900 hours.

Baby Peanut arrived days ago,

and no portal activity has been detected since.

At all. Ever.

Nor has anyone bothered to check in on me.

Sigh.

of code...

CRASHES

GENTLE LULLABY PLAYS

QUIET SNORING

LOW GROWL

LULLABY MELODY DISTORTS

MUSIC STOPS