Original subtitles

Help me!

Help!

- Where to? - Long Island.

You got it.

Now you know I can get kicked out of the Guys' Club just for answering this phone call.

Where are you?

Just some Irish bar off Times Square.

And by that you mean some sleazy strip club downtown?

You think I don't know what you boys get up to at bachelor parties?

Just so long as you know it wasn't my idea.

Tony knows some guy from uptown and...

Tony's there?

I thought you weren't inviting him.

He's my brother.

He's a troublemaker.

I bet he's even got you smoking, hasn't he?

No, no, no.

Listen, what's the worst he's gonna do---

- Tie me to a tree and shave my balls? - Come on.

He even touches your balls and you tell him he has to answer to me.

All right.

Listen, why don't you get some sleep?

I'm gonna get back inside and make sure these guys don't worry about me.

- Have fun, okay? - Okay.

- But not too much fun. - Okay.

And promise me you'll come home in one piece.

I promise.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, guys, guys. - What's going on?

Mike?

- Take it easy. - What's the matter with you?

Fuck you!

Hey motherfucker, you wanna fuck with me?

- Hey, hey, hey. - There's no problem here.

- What are you doing? What are you doing? - Huh?

- Take it easy. Take it easy. - He's just drunk.

- Hey, we're all friends here. - What's the matter with you?

Hey, hey, hey, put the pole down. Put the pole down.

- What's the matter with you? - What are you doing?

- Cut it out, cut it out. - Fucking motherfucker.

Just go back inside. We've got no problem here, All right? No problem.

- Hey, come on, Tony, Tony. - Hey you!

- What are you doing? - What?

Shut the fuck up, man.

Fucking great, man. I've never been thrown out of a shithole before.

Oh, fuck that. The girls sucked anyway.

It's the cock they suck. Where's that girl Michele?

She just took off with her friend.

Oh fuck.

- So what's next? - You know what?

It's getting late. I gotta get home.

- Oh, come on. - Don't be such a fucking pussy, Joe.

What?

Guys, I know this great club uptown.

We can drink till dawn.

Any girls there?

No, it's a fucking gay bar. You like that?

Why don't we just go get a bite to eat, all right?

- I could kill a fucking pizza right now. - Fuck food, man.

We promised Claire we wouldn't get you killed.

We didn't promise we wouldn't fuck you up.

All right, let's go. We're getting soaked. Let's go somewhere.

All right, come on, there's a train in, like, two minutes.

- Let's go. - The last one buys the beers.

Come on. Whoo! Whoo!

Mikey!

- Fuck it. - All right, I'm getting tickets, guys.

Hey, there's the train. Come on, come on.

Mikey, get me a ticket too.

I forgot my wallet.

I'll pay you back.

- Hurry up. - Come on, Mikey.

Come on, Mikey. You can do it.

Hey, you made it!

Man, I haven't jumped the stiles since I was 12.

Shit, that's when I started jumping them.

That's why your rap sheet's as long as my Johnson.

- So it's not very big, huh? - Naw.

Hey Mikey, drink some of this.

- What, did you steal this? - Fuck it.

The price of those drinks---, I figure we paid for it six times over.

You know what, guys? It's getting late. I gotta get home.

- Oh, stop it. - No, no, no, no.

If I'm staying out, you're staying out. Maddy can blame it on me.

Hey, there she is.

Yeah, she already blew you off once tonight.

I think that's probably good.

See, Mikey, that's the problem with you married men---, you got no fucking game.

Go get her. You need any singles?

- Michele. Hey Michele. - Sit down.

- Hey. - What are you doing?

You said you were gonna wait for me.

Weren't you gonna wait for me?

Oh right, you had to take your friend home?

How the fuck's he do it?

I couldn't pull a hooker in Bangkok even when I was single.

- He has a gift. - Gift my ass.

Check this out. May I?

- Thank you. Ladies! - Get 'em, Rico.

Hi Doll. What you reading?

Excuse me. Back off.

Hey, I have no idea what these guys have planned for me tonight, so do me a favor, keep an eye on this, just for safekeeping.

They finished sizing it tonight.

It's real nice, man.

Don't show it to Tony, all right?

You haven't told him he's not best man yet?

No, it's tricky, man. He just assumed.

- And there hasn't been a right time to tell him. - There probably isn't one.

Yeah, Claire wants to do it for me.

I bet she does.

Huh?

She's a good girl, man. You're doing the right thing.

Yeah.

Hey, you are.

I know, I know. I just---, sometimes I worry, you know?

Worry about what?

I just worry sometimes that it wasn't a choice.

Like you, okay? Remember when you got scholarship offers from UCLA and Columbia and you chose UCLA?

Yeah, but then I met Maddy.

Right, right, but you chose to stay in New York for her.

What's your point?

It's just life with Claire has always been easy---

Almost too easy.

I mean, she grew up here. We started to date and we moved in together and now we're getting married.

It's what you do. It's like we're on this path.

And that's fine. It's just sometimes I worry that I didn't choose it.

Does that make any fucking sense at all? I don't think it does.

No, but Jager will do that to you.

Excuse me.

It's your party. If things made sense, we wouldn't be doing our job.

I told you to get the fuck away from me.

- Ow. - What the fuck, Tony?

- The bitch slapped me. - Who are you calling a bitch?

Hey, hey, hey! Settle down, Tony.

- I'm sorry I called you a bitch, okay? - Uh-huh.

- Ow! - She's got---, whoa.

Fuck. Shit.

- Christ. - That's what you fucking get, motherfucker.

- The fucking bitch is crazy. - Enough. Enough.

Oh man. Fuck, man.

Hey, no, wait.

All right, guys, quit messing around. Let's get back on the train.

Oh, you get back on the fucking train. My eyes are killing me.

Oh my God, what---?

Hey, hey, hey!

Shit.

- Girls! - Shit.

Shit!

Listen, girls, I just want to apologize---

Would you just get the fuck away, please?

It's okay. I just want to apologize for my friend's brother.

He could be a real fucking asshole.

Fuck you, Carl. The bitch maced me.

- Maybe you should stop calling her a bitch. - Shut up, Joe.

Shit.

How the hell are we supposed to get out of here?

Seriously, guys, what are we gonna do? We're locked up tight here.

There's gotta be a way out.

Otherwise, why would the train let us off here?

See, actually the train didn't let us off.

- You forced the doors open. - Genius.

So what do we do now---, wait till they open the gates?

Could be a hell of a wait.

Is anybody getting a signal?

- Nada. - Nope.

Argh!

Whoa, it's okay. I'm here. I got you.

This is fucking great. We should be uptown having a good time if it wasn't for the bitch.

- Excuse me?! - Careful, careful. Whoa, whoa, here.

Thank you.

Look, I guess we'll just have to walk to the next station.

- What, through the tunnel? - You got a better idea?

- What if a train comes? - They don't stop here, genius.

I meant what if a train comes when you're in the tunnel, dick.

It's past 4:00 in the morning.

There isn't one for at least another hour.

I don't know, man.

All right, I'll go up to the next station and I'll find a phone and have the Transit Authority come and let you guys out.

- Is that good? - I'll come with you.

I'm not staying here with this asshole.

Come on, Michele.

- So I'm the only one not going? - Let's all go.

Actually, guys, you know what?

I think I'm just gonna stay here with Michele.

You can send somebody back for us.

- Are you sure, man? - Yeah, we'll be fine.

Come on.

- Michele. - Hmm?

What the fuck are you doing?

What? I don't want to go through the tunnels.

Yeah, but you don't know this guy.

But there are rats in there.

Rats?

I really like this one.

Okay, all right.

I'll be back in a couple of minutes. Are you sure you're okay?

- Yeah. - Okay.

Bye.

- We'll be right back. - Take your time, guys.

Hey, anybody want a toke for good luck?

No?

- Hey, watch out for the third rail, man. - Thanks.

How about you? You want some?

Sure.

Which way?

I think we should keep moving forward.

Sounds like someone's having fun.

This fucking sucks.

- Well, if you weren't such a jackoff, maybe we wouldn't be in this mess. - Fuck you, Joe.

She's the one who got off the train at the wrong fucking stop.

I can't believe I have midterms in three hours, and I'm stuck down here with this asshole.

Trust me, this is no one's idea of a good time.

And I apologize for my brother.

He doesn't mean to be such a dick.

Don't apologize to her. She's a fucking stripper.

- What? Fuck you. - Okay, how much is that gonna run me?

- Whoa, whoa, whoa. - Come on, come on.

I'm not a fucking whore. You got that?

Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot. You're just stripping to put your way through college, which makes you what? A fucking cliche.

Tony, you're giving me a fucking headache.

At least I have a fucking education.

Can we just shut the fuck up and keep walking, please?

I can't believe you two are related.

That's what everyone says.

I got the looks.

Well, you sure didn't get the fucking manners.

- So what school do you go to? - Columbia.

- Hey, that's where I went. - Yeah?

Yeah, an athletic scholarship.

He was this close to going to the Olympics. Weren't you, rabbit?

Really?

Pulled a hamstring last minute.

What's your major?

History.

What was your thesis---, Stripping Through The Ages?

Okay, tough guy, what do you do for a living?

I get by.

Uh-huh.

Tony actually goes through jobs the way most people go through socks.

Well, maybe if somebody would talk to Carl like they promised, I could work at the dealership with you guys and I wouldn't have to nickel-and-dime it.

Look, it's just not the right time, okay?

What he's trying to tell you is this Carl---

He probably wants guys who can sell buicks, not steal them.

Hey, you don't know me.

Oh, believe me, I know you.

What the hell is that?

It's fucking creepy down here.

Yeah, let's just keep moving.

Hey, come here.

Oh wait. No, no, wait.

What? What?

Tell me you've got something.

Oh yeah, yeah, I've got---

I've got something.

Hey, hey, hey!

He took my wallet.

Hey, come here, you little bastard.

I got you, you little bastard.

Come here.

Carl?

Carl.

Carl.

Carl.

- You asshole. - What? He fucking bit me.

Don't run off like that.

Oh shit, man. That's gonna need fucking stitches.

Here, let me see.

He could have rabies or something.

I think you'll live.

What if he's got fucking aids?

What? He couldn't have been more than seven or eight.

Who cares? Kids can be born with that shit.

Here.

This is going to sting, okay?

Ow. Shit.

You baby.

How far apart are these fucking stations?

Still no signal.

Cute kid.

Emily.

Say hello to daddy.

Say hello.

She's very pretty.

Oh good. Now we're looking at baby pictures.

You know, Mike, I'd like to go on record as saying this is officially the Most Boring Bachelor Party in the History of Bachelor Parties.

All I want to do is go home and take a hot shower and climb into bed with my wife-to-be.

- Oh, so this is your ordeal. - My what?

We studied it last semester in Traditions and Ceremonies.

A Bachelor Party used to be called a "Stag Night."

Centuries ago a Stag Night was a test of a man's worthiness to marry.

- My worthiness? - Uh-huh.

A prospective groom had to prove he was man enough to protect and feed his family.

So the village elders sent him out into the forest alone to hunt and kill a wild stag.

- And if he failed? - Well, the stag killed him.

That sounds like a kind of party.

We killed a bottle of Jagermeister. Does that count?

No.

Look.

Hey, there's somebody there.

What the hell are they doing?

- Hey, both of you. - Oh shit.

Back it up right now. Get away from the machines.

All right, keep 'em where I can see 'em, all right?

Get up on the wall right now! Get on the wall.

Hey, I'm talking to you.

No! No!

What the fuck?

Oh shit.

Let's get the fuck out of here.

Shh.

I don't think they can see us.

Run! Run, run!

Come on.

Go rabbit go!

Mikey, come on, go. Mikey, go.

Come on, come on.

No, please don't.

Which way?

No, no, no, this way.

Come on.

Fuck.

I'm sure they'll be back soon.

I was fucking stupid. We should have just gone with them.

What was that?

If that's that little bastard that did me, I'll kill him.

Is that you?

Carl, don't.

Where are you, you little prick?

Where are you?

Carl!

Come on.

Come on, please!

- What the fuck just happened? - We just watched a murder, you jackass.

- We have to go back. - What?

- Michele and your buddy are back there. - No, fuck that.

- We went in the wrong tunnel. - No fucking way, man.

No, we get to a phone. We call the cops. They'll deal with this.

- This is insane. - What about you? You can't leave them there.

You saw those guys. They hacked an armed cop to pieces.

- Oh my God. - Let's just get to a phone and call for help, all right?

Another station can't be far.

- What the fuck? You guys are fucked up. - Look, I'm not going back.

If you want to go back, that's your decision.

- Shut up for one second. - What? What?

Just listen.

Do you hear that?

Hear what?

Shh.

- It sounds like a TV. - What?

What is that?

I'm telling you it's a TV.

Mikey, come on, whatever you're gonna do, do it.

- What are you doing? - Let's just keep going.

I'm going in.

Oh fuck.

Go on.

Jesus.

- Jesus. - See anything?

Nothing. I don't see a fucking thing.

- Are you okay? - Yeah.

Jesus.

I guess she doesn't like visitors.

She's tapped a power or cable system.

Let's hope she tapped into a phone line.

Hello?

Hello, Miss.

Please tell me you know what we're going to do.

Of course I know.

Great, so what are we going to do?

Please. Go in.

Hey, isn't he that magician's kid?

Yeah.

- Hello. - So how about you? Do you know any tricks?

- Miss. - No, I don't know any tricks.

- Oh, really? - 'Cause we've got one for you.

- Miss. - Alakazam!

Miss.

Fuck.

- Are you okay? - Yeah.

It's a fucking doll, Mikey.

It's a fucking doll.

Who leaves a fucking mannequin watching TV?

Okay, let's just find a phone and get out of here, guys.

You mean like this?

Or like these?

Oh fuck.

What?

Ugh, who lives like this?

It's them.

Okay, just look, just grab a knife or whatever and let's get the fuck out of here.

Get down, get down.

- Shhh. - What is it?

Shit, they're back.

Fuck.

Okay, we gotta get out of here.

That tunnel's the only way out of here, man.

We have to hide.

Shit.

Get them up, get them up, get them up, get them up.

- Go, Joe, go go. - Go go.

Go, go, go.

Fuck.

- Wait, wait, wait. - What?

What the fuck are you doing?

Hurry up, come on.

Hey, isn't he that magician's kid?

Yeah.

- So how about you? - Do you know any tricks?

No, I don't know any tricks.

- Oh, really? - 'Cause we've got one for you.

Alakazam!

No, Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.

Mike, wait. Shh, wait.

Eat it!

Fuck.

Mikey, wait.

Mikey.

- Tony, come on, this way. - Mikey! No, we're not leaving.

What are you doing?

- Tony. - Come on.

Mikey!

Shit, go.

Go, get out!

Come on.

Oh shit.

- Are you okay? - Go, go, go.

Joe!

Go, go, go, go.

- Help! Help! - Help us!

Help! Help! Help!

- Help! - Somebody help us!

Help! Help us! Help!

Somebody!

Go, go, go!

Are they gone?

I don't know.

Tony.

Somebody must have seen us, right, on the train?

- It was too dark. - We were shouting, waving.

- They didn't see us. - How the fuck do you know?

Nobody fucking saw us, all right?

Nobody knows we're down here.

We're all alone. Nobody's coming after us.

If we want to get out of here, it's up to us.

Who the fuck are those guys?

They're animals.

Did you see what they did to Michele?

Carl was still alive.

Look, let's just keep moving, okay?

It's like Joe said---, there must be another station not too far.

It's fucking New York City for chrissake.

This can't be happening.

I don't even know what line we're on.

I don't either. I'm all turned around.

I don't even know which way north is.

So we're fucked. We're fucked.

What are our choices? We either go out there or take our chances down there.

We're going down here.

Come on.

Are you kidding me?

I've always heard stories about crazy people living in tunnels.

I thought it was bullshit.

Did you see how many wallets and IDs they had?

- Do you think those people---? - Don't think about it.

You're bleeding.

It's nothing.

I should have just gone home.

I should have listened to my fucking instincts and gone home.

- No shit, we all should have gone home. - Fuck you, Tony.

- It's all your fault. - Hey, don't blame me.

What were you doing out tonight? Nobody wanted you.

You know why? You fuck everything up.

Get out of my face, Joe.

Carl is dead because of you.

- You fucking prick! - Don't blame me for Carl.

I'm your guy's Best Fucking Man.

- Best Man, my ass! - Joe, Joe, enough!

- Guys! - Joe, I said enough.

Let's go.

Go.

Come on, Tony.

Shh, shh.

Did you hear that?

What's this?

Mike, it's fine.

- Be careful, Tony. - All right.

Tony! Tony!

Tony!

Mike, Mikey, he's not one of them. Hey, hey.

- Are you all right? You all right, you okay? - I'm fine. I'm fine.

I just saw him grab you. I thought he was one of them.

Hey, hey, Mikey, Mikey, I'm fine.

He's not one of them, all right?

- What are you doing? - Sir, are you all right?

Are you all right?

Sir, sir, are you all right?

- I'm sorry, are you all right? - My cans.

Can you help us get out of here? Can you help us get out?

Sir, if you can understand, please, you have to help us.

No way out.

- What did he say? - No way out.

Don't listen to him. He's fucking nuts.

Did you see that?

What is that?

It's that fucking kid again.

What's he doing?

It's a signal.

Come on, let's get out of here.

Run!

No way out.

Mikey, Mikey, we can't outrun a fucking dog.

Where are we gonna go?

This way.

Come on.

Shit. Which way?

There's a mile marker. There's a station down this way.

How are they still following us?

- It's me. They're following my blood. - Are you still bleeding?

- Here, let me see. - It's bad.

Can you stop it?

He needs a doctor.

- We gotta go. - Can you keep up with us, Joe?

I'm the rabbit, man. I was born to run.

- We gotta go. - Come on.

Joe, come on, man. What are you doing?

- If you get to a phone before I do, you call Maddy, you tell her I'm okay. - What?

Don't look too worried, man.

The last one back buys the beers.

No, man, come on!

Joe! Joe!

And this stadium is on its feet for this amazing young boy, only 22 years old and already an Olympic Contender.

I'll race you, motherfucker!

Come on.

Mikey, come on.

Fuck!

Help!

Help!

Say hello to daddy.

Come on.

There it is. Come on.

We've been going around in circles.

Are you fucking kidding me?

We're never getting out of here.

- Don't say that. - Why not?

Because we are not giving up now.

Look, we have no choice. We came from that direction.

All we can do is backtrack.

I'm not going back in the fucking tunnel.

What part of "we have no choice" do you not understand, Tony?

Look around, Mikey. We're not gonna make it.

We are gonna make it out of here.

We're gonna make it out of this fucking tunnel. We owe it to Carl and we owe it to Michele and we owe it to Joe.

We are gonna make it out of this fucking tunnel.

And we're gonna call the cops and we're gonna make sure these bastards get what they deserve, do you hear me?

I hear you.

Do you hear that?

Fuck.

Shit, come on, come on. Come on. Shit.

Mikey, Mikey.

Shh, shh.

Come on.

Shh.

Come on.

Fuck.

Shh.

- Shh, shh. - Get off, get off, get off.

Mike.

Hey! Hey motherfuckers, I'm in here!

Huh? You want me, huh? Come on, I'm in here!

What the fuck is he doing?

Come and get me!

Tony, no!

- Go, go, go. - Argh! Oh my God.

Argh!

Shit.

What are you waiting for, huh?

Do you want me? Come and get me.

Come on!

Come on.

Come on!

- All right. Yeah. - Are you okay?

Okay.

Run, Mikey!

Here.

We've got to find Tony.

- Which way? - I don't know.

I don't even know if this is the same fucking tunnel.

Tony!

Tony! Fuck. Tony!

I don't think you should be shouting right now.

- We're not leaving here without him. - No, I get that.

If the lower platform is down there, then where we fell through must be on the other side of this wall.

All right, we've got to find a way through.

Come on.

If anything happens to Tony, I don't know---

I don't know what I'd do. The things that I've said---

People say things they don't mean. I'm sure he knows that.

But you don't know Tony. You don't know him.

He thinks he's a tough guy.

Shit.

- Did you get it? - Yes.

- Does it work? - Yes.

Can you help us, please? We really need a phone.

Please.

We just need some help.

Anyone?

Hey, can you help us? We just need a telephone.

Hey, stop right there. Who the hell are you?

What the fuck are you doing? Put the knife down, man.

- We were attacked. - Three of our friends have been murdered and my brother is in the tunnel somewhere.

That's horrible. Are you okay?

Do you have a phone that we can use right away?

No, nothing that works.

How about a way out? Can you show us the way out?

Yeah, yeah, let me grab a flashlight.

Brita, go with him, all right? He's gonna show you the way out of here.

- No, no, no. Where are you going? - I'm not leaving without Tony.

Are you kidding? You can't go back there. They'll kill you.

There's only two now and they don't have their dog. I'll be fine.

- How many were there? - Three.

One of us needs to get back to a phone, okay?

Call the cops, make sure they get here.

Cops? You can't be bringing the cops down here.

I don't know what you people don't understand.

Three of my friends were fucking murdered and they fed them to their dogs.

Look, we're sorry about your brother, but...

But what?

It's not our problem.

Mike! What the fuck are you doing?

Get off of me!

No, no, no, don't do that.

This is our home. We have a life here.

No, please, please. You don't know what you're doing.

Yes, we do.

Fuck.

Get off me, you fucker!

Fuck off!

Fuck you.

Oh my God.

- Are you all right? - Yes.

- You're okay. You're okay. - Oh my God.

You're okay. You're okay. It's all right.

Brita.

Fuck!

Fuck.

Look out!

No!

Brita.

Okay, okay, okay, I'm gonna lift you up.

Come on, come on, you're okay.

- Okay, it's all right. - N-n-no.

Come on. It's okay. Okay, okay, okay.

Okay, just stay. Let me see. Let me see.

Let me see. Okay.

Okay, okay, it's okay.

Okay, shh.

Okay, okay.

Did you find Tony?

Yeah.

Yeah.

He's dead.

I'm so sorry.

I never even got a chance to tell him he wasn't Best Man.

Yeah, but he was.

What's her name?

It's Claire. Her name's Claire.

Mm.

She's lucky you chose her.

Brita.

Hello.

Mike?

Mike, is that you?

Yeah. Yeah.

Honey, what's wrong?

Talk to me.

Whatever it is, everything's going to be okay.

I love you.