Original subtitles

Good evening.

It's very kind of you to arrange this appointment.

It's only normal. After all, you're a very good client.

Well, well, she must be new here. She's a new girl.

Then she doesn't know about me. That's right. You'll come as a surprise, too.

Oh, I love surprises.

Pour me a drink.

Oh, you'll be all right. He's not hard to please.

Damn, I missed a stitch.

There's not much doing tonight.

Boy, you expect all the machos are watching the... Okay, my TV. Damn TV.

Surprise, big surprise.

Dropping another one.

I'm sorry.

No.

Inspector Lambree.

Oh, what is this?

Bye, squad.

Wait a minute. You can't call like this.

No, we can't.

I have an idea. We're legit.

We're legit.

Do it.

Oh, yes, do it.

Do it.

Huh?

Inspector Lavery, my squad.

Why, it's Mr. Landers of Landers Industries.

You're right.

That's me.

All right, get up.

Follow me. Very well, but this is most embarrassing.

I'm out of work.

I'll start looking for a job, I guess.

What page are the Juan ads in?

Ah.

Here we are.

Come on, move it along there.

Hurry up.

Look out. What? Get out of here. What?

Go on.

Out.

I'm really in a fix now, Inspector.

I believe our methods of education are inadequate.

My advice to you is to open a specialized school.

Ladies, you will now take your seats.

Good morning, my dear.

Professor Lambert, my chief assistant.

And Mr. Day, who is our detention officer.

You'd better keep quiet from now on, ladies.

Well, let me see now.

Not a bad performer.

But her boyfriend, Frank, sees room for improvement.

Claudia. I see.

Almost 20 years old. And still a virgin. Her fiancé considers this abnormal and

desires rectification.

She's afraid of machos.

Natalie.

Aspirations to be an actress.

She understands that in order to make the grade, she must be able to offer

things. And pleasure is one of these things.

Nanette, an ex -professor of gymnastics.

She's decided to change her profession.

And in order to do this, she's enrolled with us to practice new movements.

Ladies, I feel the same way as my colleagues. I am very proud that you

chosen to come to us in order to better yourselves.

Your fiancés and boyfriends gave us the task of instructing you, and we want

your full cooperation.

I hope that's clear.

Please take your pencil and paper.

We will now begin our very first lesson.

It is very important to know how to strip.

The movements are delicate.

And should be precise.

Yet never brisk.

Pay close attention.

Slowly and deliberately.

Hands can always be used like this.

And now, we'll go on to something more serious.

You should always express your feelings.

Let him know what's on your mind.

She touches on quick, doesn't she?

You bet it.

She'd win the Oscar if she were an actress.

You think so?

Oh, yeah.

Well, speaking as an ex -gym teacher.

Did you notice the cock on Mr. Lambert?

It looks horrible.

Come now, Claudia. You're a bad influence.

What's this I see? It looks like ink.

Didn't you wash your hands before coming to lunch?

Yes, but it didn't come off.

Did you really scrub them?

can see that you don't scrub them very hard.

That's a little better.

The rest of you can go back to class.

No, you stay here.

This is your lucky day.

I'm going to give you a chance to get ahead of your classmates in your

Don't stop.

It's good.

It's so good, my darling.

Yes.

realized that in order to get ahead as an actress, I would have to give head, I

decided to make the most of it.

I'm going to be an honor pupil, and after that I'll be a star.

And you, Susie, why are you here?

I'm not perverted enough.

I've got talent, but I can do a lot better. I couldn't keep up with my

Frank and his fantasies. And so, when I heard about this course, he enrolled me.

So, here I am.

Two o 'clock, time for class. Come on, let's go.

a little bit more enthusiasm.

Starting position.

Fine.

There. Very good.

Oh, no, no, no.

I can see you have a lot to learn.

Keep trying.

You're not doing your best.

Come on now, Susie. It's not a pogo stick.

Now, pay attention.

All of you, come here.

Let's go.

That's it. Come on.

Closer.

Ladies, ladies.

All right, let's cut that out now.

You have a big day ahead tomorrow.

You'll need your rest. Now go to sleep.

It's forbidden to mix pleasure with studies.

I've already told you once.

I don't want to, Natalie, but I'm going to have to punish you.

mm -hmm

Mm -hmm.

Our school is special and the punishment is severe.

brief review of how important a part sex has played in the history of the world.

In modern times, it plays the same role.

We could say that Mary Magdalene's role was important when she was active, and

Masalina's role, too.

We'll pass on briefly to Lucretia Borgia, whose reputation, in my opinion,

overrated.

Well, on the other hand, all during the 18th century, most women behaved the

same way. Yes?

Uh, excuse me, I'm lost. I was looking for the bathroom.

Ladies, we will abandon our history lesson for the time being and take part

practical experience.

I think I made a mistake.

I'm confused.

I mean, could I... We'll see, won't we, ladies?

If you don't mind, I'll go now.

I'm only the plumber. Please.

Well, Claudia, he doesn't want to help us. That's not it. No, no, no, no. Oh,

no, no.

I have a job to do.

I've only come here to repair the bathtub.

Oh, no, not that.

Oh, please, not that. No.

This is all a misunderstanding. Really, I can explain. Please.

Oh, no.

Oh, I have things to do. I can't stay here all day. Let me go.

Oh, no.

I have to account for my time.

You're not being reasonable. Please.

No, no.

I'm only... Oh, please.

Worksheet.

Oh.

Oh, no.

You're taking advantage.

Oh, come on, please. Let me go. I have work to do.

Business is business.

Oh, no.

Let me go on with my work.

Not that one. Not the big one.

Oh, please.

Oh, I'm a married man.

Careful, Nanette, you're not at a track meet.

Please.

Claudia, Claudia, let's see a little more effort.

There, it's Claudia.

Claudia. You'll never get your all, Claudia.

Oh, Claudia, take it easy.

I'm a plumber.

There.

Excellent, lady. Excellent.

But the link.

Oh, he loves it. Yes, he loves it.

That's right.

Very good, Natalie.

Very good.

I only came to repair a link.

But it's not so easy. You don't understand. I'm only the plumber. I

leaks. Oh, leaks.

That's why I came.

That's great. She's good at it.

She's getting better and better.

Let the others have a little too, you might as well.

Don't forget all the money he spent to pay for your enrollment.

you forget to do your homework.

Is it better now?

Oh, yeah.

Some months later.

Getting picky?

Just nervous.

It reminds me of the auditions in the drama court.

Come on, now. There's no need to worry. You'll all be fine.

Now, finish your lunch.

You'll need your strength for the exams.

Come on now, that's it.

Come on now, you can do better than that.

I'm going to take notes.

That's not bad, Claudia.

Go on.

Claudia, that's the way.

A little more feeling, Claudia.

Good.

That's fine, Susie.

Keep it up now.

That's the way.

You're a real scholar.

Go on. Let yourself go.

That's it.

Deep sensuality.

Let yourself go.

Don't stop until you finish the sequence I

Want

every

one of you to enjoy this Slowly

on what you're doing

just

wonderful ladies

All a question of rhythm.

I think they're doing very well. They are.

That's the way.

You'll go places.

Not bad, not bad.

I want your notes after all this is over.

Yes.

Mm -hmm

Keep it up right to the end.

Well, Lambert, I see you can appreciate a good student.

My colleagues are a bit exhausted from their participation in our recent exam.

I hope you understand.

I'd like to present...

to lose your control.

I rated the same. Have you rated their attitude? That's very important.

All right, it's Nanette's turn now.

Nanette?

Let's bury Nanette.

I think we should make an exception.

Checking over the list, I see that it's Natalie's turn now.

Give one point for willingness.

Some long hours later.

They come here. They come.

After

careful

deliberation, I'm proud to announce that each and every one of you have passed

your test with high honors.

Some days later.

Oh, I've been waiting for this.

Reg!

Recreation exercises.

I didn't know that you'd take that from here.

Well,

we've got to keep it going.

Oh, I'd be very proud of my girl.

Oh, wait. What are you doing here? This isn't your fairy tale.

Grandmother's right.

What do you want?

The dwarves were a drag.

And my prince charming's a faggot. So I decided to come and see the wolf.

Excellent idea.

Come closer, my child.

I have a better time than the wolf in the other story.

Definitely marvelous.

Do you think he'll get his jealous?

Yes, usually do.

Now it's your turn, little Red Riding Hood. Go on.

You're doing fine, Little Red Riding Hood.

You may continue.

Look at the time!

prince charming of sleeping beauty.

But on the other hand, Snow White's prince was so gay...

I'm supposed to proffer the princess.

Hey, what is this?

Hey.

Hey.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Wake up, princess.

This won't be easy.

Well, I'm through kidding around.

So...

As you can see, she is still sleeping.

Are you gonna fucking wake up or not?

It's great.

Oh, yeah, Princess, do it.

Oh, you're awake, Princess.

It's been such a long time.

Oh, yeah.

The alarm radio was never this good.

Shut up and sign off. That's right.

Oh, that's better.

Now you're all witnesses.

I woke up the prince.

It's time for our tombola drawing, gentlemen. May I wish you good luck.

Number 23.

Who has number 23?

It's me.

It's me.

Now we'll see if number 23 can hold his own.

It seems to me that he can hold his own.

But let's carry on.

I'm convinced he can hold his own.

He deserves his price.

The laddy one that told me...

What brings this visit?

What's going on, anyway?

I've been told of the presence of a number of young ladies in your

establishment.

Didn't you see the sign posted on the door?

You mean private school?

Yes.

Dear Inspector, I followed your advice.

You've come just in time.

We're having our school exercises.

Of course you're invited.

sat on the wall, humpty -dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horsemen, all

the king's men suck.

Tom, Tom, the piper's son stole a pig and had some fun.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack get off the pot, or quit.

Lulu had a baby. His name was Bonnie Jim.

She put him in a piss pot to see if he could swim.

He swam to the bottom, he swam to the top.

Lulu got excited and grabbed him by the cock, tailed ginger ale.

Five cents a glass. If you don't like it, shove it up your ass.

Hmm. Mary had a little lamb.

She also had a bear. I often saw her little lamb, but never saw her bear.

Peas, porridge, hot.

Peas, porridge, cold. Peas, porridge in the pot. Nine days, I'll pee you.

As I lay sleeping, the sun began to rise. It spread its golden light across

summer sky.

The grass still green and lush and spread with morning dew to reflect the

morning sunlight and enhance the radiant hues.

These gentlemen really seem to appreciate the show.

Looks like they're ready to blow their guns.

Well, Inspector, I can assure you... That every single one of them has a hard

-on. That's not Victor Hugo those girls are reading.

I'm afraid I'm going to have to close this school down.

But what will become of me?

Well, I've heard times are getting tough in the cinema.

Why don't you try going into production?

There was a young soldier from Munich who threw up all over his tunic. To add

the frolic, he fell on his bolly.

And now he is known as a eunuch.