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1
00:00:00,561 --> 00:00:02,133
- previously on
Hot in cleveland...
2
00:00:02,157 --> 00:00:03,379
- what the hell
Is all this stuff?
3
00:00:03,402 --> 00:00:06,210
- you had to date
A cop, didn't you?
4
00:00:08,350 --> 00:00:11,105
I'm in
Frickin' jail!
5
00:00:11,128 --> 00:00:12,414
- elka, I'm
Gonna be blunt.
6
00:00:12,437 --> 00:00:14,234
The state has a very
Solid case against you.
7
00:00:14,257 --> 00:00:16,341
- so you want me to
Pretend to be senile?
8
00:00:16,364 --> 00:00:18,512
- this is a hearing to
Determine if the defendant
9
00:00:18,535 --> 00:00:20,139
Is competent
To stand trial.
10
00:00:20,162 --> 00:00:21,833
For the defense,
We have
11
00:00:21,856 --> 00:00:24,834
The very
Capable kirk stark.
12
00:00:24,857 --> 00:00:27,068
Good afternoon, counselor.
- good afternoon, judge.
13
00:00:27,091 --> 00:00:30,549
- it is now.
14
00:00:30,572 --> 00:00:33,997
- if I get an all-female jury,
I've got it made.
15
00:00:34,019 --> 00:00:35,230
All:
16
00:00:36,893 --> 00:00:38,754
- in a situation comedy
There are two separate,
17
00:00:38,777 --> 00:00:40,796
But equally
Important stories.
18
00:00:40,820 --> 00:00:42,330
The "A" story, which is about
19
00:00:42,353 --> 00:00:43,893
The comic adventures
Of characters.
20
00:00:43,916 --> 00:00:48,971
And the "B" story, which is the
Same thing, but shorter.
21
00:00:48,993 --> 00:00:50,651
These are
Those stories.
22
00:00:57,038 --> 00:00:58,580
- elka, how you doing?
You nervous?
23
00:00:58,603 --> 00:01:01,964
- I'm too screwed
To be nervous.
24
00:01:01,987 --> 00:01:04,071
- oh, now,
Come on.
25
00:01:04,094 --> 00:01:05,188
Let's just
Be positive.
26
00:01:05,212 --> 00:01:06,371
- how?
27
00:01:06,393 --> 00:01:08,987
They caught me red-handed
With stolen mafia loot.
28
00:01:09,010 --> 00:01:10,106
- true.
29
00:01:10,129 --> 00:01:12,883
But your lawyer is
Irresistible to women,
30
00:01:12,906 --> 00:01:15,693
And we have
Six female jurors.
31
00:01:16,769 --> 00:01:18,055
- okay, people.
32
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,970
We continue with
Case number 10421.
33
00:01:19,994 --> 00:01:22,110
the people vs.
Elka ostrovsky.
34
00:01:22,133 --> 00:01:25,494
- and we know judge lesser
Has the hots for your lawyer.
35
00:01:25,517 --> 00:01:28,367
- everybody have
A good weekend?
36
00:01:28,390 --> 00:01:31,146
Kirk?
37
00:01:32,765 --> 00:01:34,018
Oh, no.
38
00:01:34,041 --> 00:01:38,105
What did you do to
That beautiful face?
39
00:01:38,128 --> 00:01:43,278
- I told him, softball
Is an ugly man's sport.
40
00:01:43,301 --> 00:01:45,831
- I was expecting a bunt.
- what's wrong with you?
41
00:01:45,854 --> 00:01:49,695
Nobody bunts
In softball.
42
00:01:49,718 --> 00:01:51,929
This happened yesterday?
- that's right.
43
00:01:51,952 --> 00:01:54,345
- I thought you said you were
Going to your mother's house.
44
00:01:57,188 --> 00:01:58,921
I mean, as
So many men do...
45
00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:00,166
After church...
46
00:02:00,188 --> 00:02:03,965
On sundays.
47
00:02:03,988 --> 00:02:05,785
- may I see you
In chambers?
48
00:02:05,808 --> 00:02:06,776
Cynthia?
49
00:02:06,799 --> 00:02:08,307
- it's "Your honor."
50
00:02:08,330 --> 00:02:11,054
And no, you may not.
51
00:02:11,077 --> 00:02:13,288
I'm gonna need a minute
To process all this.
52
00:02:13,311 --> 00:02:16,278
So sit your lying,
Hideous face down!
53
00:02:29,753 --> 00:02:31,390
- it's all over.
- no, maybe not.
54
00:02:31,413 --> 00:02:34,157
Check out
Juror number eight.
55
00:02:37,479 --> 00:02:38,990
- oh, sure.
The nerd.
56
00:02:39,013 --> 00:02:41,703
- haven't you seen him
Looking at you?
57
00:02:41,726 --> 00:02:43,970
- I have had the feeling
That someone was
58
00:02:43,992 --> 00:02:46,235
Mentally undressing me.
59
00:02:46,258 --> 00:02:50,673
But for me
That's not unusual.
60
00:02:50,696 --> 00:02:52,813
- well, trust me.
It's him.
61
00:02:52,836 --> 00:02:55,080
So all you have to do
Is flirt,
62
00:02:55,103 --> 00:02:56,389
And maybe he'll
Feel sorry for you
63
00:02:56,412 --> 00:02:58,784
And vote
To acquit.
64
00:02:58,806 --> 00:03:00,955
- it works with
Speeding tickets.
65
00:03:00,977 --> 00:03:02,072
- really?
66
00:03:02,094 --> 00:03:04,338
You know, I've never
Been pulled over.
67
00:03:04,361 --> 00:03:06,893
- because girls like you
Don't speed, dear.
68
00:03:06,916 --> 00:03:10,660
But girls like me don't
Know anything else.
69
00:03:10,683 --> 00:03:15,704
- well, all you have to do
Is turn one juror.
70
00:03:15,728 --> 00:03:19,057
- done,
And done.
71
00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:22,333
Butterscotch,
Do your stuff.
72
00:03:31,786 --> 00:03:32,848
- all right.
73
00:03:32,871 --> 00:03:35,116
I've moved on.
74
00:03:35,139 --> 00:03:36,392
But I am in
No mood to play,
75
00:03:36,415 --> 00:03:38,118
So nobody better
Waste my time.
76
00:03:38,141 --> 00:03:41,150
the case of
People vs. Elka ostrovsky
77
00:03:41,173 --> 00:03:43,022
Is now
In session.
78
00:04:01,063 --> 00:04:02,253
- there.
79
00:04:02,276 --> 00:04:03,914
What do
You think?
80
00:04:03,937 --> 00:04:05,924
- you are amazing.
81
00:04:05,947 --> 00:04:08,383
- I know you're talking
To your reflection.
82
00:04:08,406 --> 00:04:09,470
But I'll take
The compliment.
83
00:04:09,492 --> 00:04:11,672
- now, where are
My smart glasses?
84
00:04:11,695 --> 00:04:13,555
- the ones without the lenses?
- yes.
85
00:04:13,578 --> 00:04:15,312
- getting an interview
With the governor's wife
86
00:04:15,334 --> 00:04:16,429
Was quite a
Coup for me.
87
00:04:16,451 --> 00:04:17,929
And I want to look like
A serious journalist.
88
00:04:17,952 --> 00:04:20,132
- well, I don't think she's
Gonna be that challenging.
89
00:04:20,155 --> 00:04:23,133
She seems a little
Blonde to me.
90
00:04:23,156 --> 00:04:24,219
- yeah, I see
What you mean.
91
00:04:24,242 --> 00:04:28,274
- highlights on,
But nobody's home.
92
00:04:28,297 --> 00:04:30,190
- I'm gonna see if I can
Get any news about elka's trial.
93
00:04:30,212 --> 00:04:31,499
- hmm.
94
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:33,510
- ah, victoria chase.
95
00:04:33,533 --> 00:04:35,712
Heather shaw.
- oh, it's so nice to meet you.
96
00:04:35,736 --> 00:04:37,149
I'm a big fan
Of your husband's.
97
00:04:37,171 --> 00:04:39,065
And you make such
A handsome couple.
98
00:04:39,087 --> 00:04:40,117
- okay, look vicky.
99
00:04:40,141 --> 00:04:41,619
We can do
This two ways.
100
00:04:41,642 --> 00:04:43,119
We can keep up
The goo-ga-ga,
101
00:04:43,142 --> 00:04:44,716
And coast like
Merry idiots,
102
00:04:44,738 --> 00:04:46,217
Or we can grow a pair
And admit it.
103
00:04:46,239 --> 00:04:47,621
We're both in this
To manipulate
104
00:04:47,644 --> 00:04:49,984
The poor saps
We call, "The people."
105
00:04:50,007 --> 00:04:52,634
- go on.
106
00:04:52,657 --> 00:04:54,006
- america might
Not know
107
00:04:54,030 --> 00:04:56,145
About the first family
Of ohio now.
108
00:04:56,168 --> 00:04:57,933
But if I got anything
To do with it, they will.
109
00:04:57,956 --> 00:04:58,891
- wow.
110
00:04:58,914 --> 00:05:00,998
You just wanna
Be famous.
111
00:05:01,021 --> 00:05:05,085
Dear god, I finally
Understand politics.
112
00:05:05,107 --> 00:05:06,490
- well, we've got
A long ways to go.
113
00:05:06,514 --> 00:05:08,757
Right now, we're completely
Unknown outside ohio.
114
00:05:08,780 --> 00:05:10,034
Even right
Next door to that
115
00:05:10,057 --> 00:05:12,811
Bleeding abscess
People call indiana.
116
00:05:12,834 --> 00:05:14,694
But while charles
Is only governor now...
117
00:05:14,717 --> 00:05:16,355
- who knows where
He could end up.
118
00:05:16,378 --> 00:05:17,888
If you play
His cards right.
119
00:05:17,911 --> 00:05:19,197
I mean, look
At sarah palin.
120
00:05:19,220 --> 00:05:20,888
- now that woman
Knows marketing.
121
00:05:20,911 --> 00:05:23,251
Fat chance getting my nitwit
Of a teenage daughter on
122
00:05:23,274 --> 00:05:25,709
dancing with the stars.
123
00:05:25,733 --> 00:05:27,849
- well, maybe if
She gets pregnant.
124
00:05:27,872 --> 00:05:30,178
- mm, knock wood.
125
00:05:30,202 --> 00:05:33,915
- you know, I am not without
Ambition in my field, either.
126
00:05:33,939 --> 00:05:35,320
Just yesterday,
Someone told me
127
00:05:35,343 --> 00:05:37,555
That I had the legs
For fox news.
128
00:05:37,578 --> 00:05:38,767
- well that's one of
The highest compliments
129
00:05:38,791 --> 00:05:41,002
You can get
In journalism.
130
00:05:41,025 --> 00:05:42,216
- thank you.
131
00:05:42,239 --> 00:05:44,355
- so let's use each other
To get to the top.
132
00:05:44,377 --> 00:05:47,005
- in hollywood,
We call that friendship.
133
00:05:47,028 --> 00:05:50,805
So we are campaigning
Against illiteracy, right?
134
00:05:50,828 --> 00:05:52,240
- or childhood obesity.
135
00:05:52,264 --> 00:05:53,933
I'm waiting to see
Which one polls better.
136
00:05:53,955 --> 00:05:55,337
In fact, I'm waiting for
The numbers to get in.
137
00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:56,423
Let me see
What's going on.
138
00:05:56,446 --> 00:05:59,872
What's going on?
139
00:05:59,894 --> 00:06:02,139
- I just got a bunch
Of texts from mel.
140
00:06:02,161 --> 00:06:03,542
"Elka's about to
Take the stand."
141
00:06:03,565 --> 00:06:05,362
"I'm not supposed
To text in court."
142
00:06:05,385 --> 00:06:08,587
"Here comes the bailiff,
He's taking my cell ph..."
143
00:06:08,610 --> 00:06:09,801
That's the end of
The transmission.
144
00:06:09,823 --> 00:06:10,759
- oh, damn.
145
00:06:10,781 --> 00:06:12,002
Well, this story
Better be good
146
00:06:12,025 --> 00:06:14,237
If it's making us
Miss all of that.
147
00:06:14,260 --> 00:06:15,515
- the poll is in.
148
00:06:15,538 --> 00:06:17,717
It's childhood obesity
Over illiteracy.
149
00:06:17,740 --> 00:06:20,400
They probably couldn't
Read the poll question.
150
00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:23,273
Tell the dumb kid to go home
And send in the fatty.
151
00:06:23,295 --> 00:06:25,061
Hey, I know you.
152
00:06:25,084 --> 00:06:26,977
You're joy scroggs,
The eyebrow queen.
153
00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:28,670
You did
Oprah's arch.
154
00:06:28,693 --> 00:06:30,233
- I'm not at liberty to say,
But trust me,
155
00:06:30,256 --> 00:06:31,255
If I were at
Liberty to say,
156
00:06:31,278 --> 00:06:32,372
My answer would
Certainly not be,
157
00:06:32,395 --> 00:06:34,000
"I'm not at
Liberty to say."
158
00:06:34,023 --> 00:06:36,682
- I like the way you evade.
It's nice, it's sexy.
159
00:06:36,705 --> 00:06:38,598
Would you be willing
To do my husband's brows?
160
00:06:38,620 --> 00:06:40,929
Or should I
Say brow?
161
00:06:40,952 --> 00:06:42,174
- oh, tragedy.
- mm-hmm.
162
00:06:42,198 --> 00:06:44,632
Walking hair ball.
163
00:06:44,655 --> 00:06:46,548
- well, it's very manly.
- mm-hmm.
164
00:06:46,571 --> 00:06:47,952
- oh, let's not
Sugarcoat it.
165
00:06:47,975 --> 00:06:49,867
We're not getting
Within 50 miles of d.C.
166
00:06:49,890 --> 00:06:53,507
With these dandruff-catchers
On his forehead.
167
00:06:53,530 --> 00:06:55,806
So if you'd be willing
To trim back these hedges
168
00:06:55,829 --> 00:06:58,392
You can
Name your price.
169
00:06:58,415 --> 00:06:59,478
- well, actually,
Instead of money
170
00:06:59,501 --> 00:07:00,755
I could use
Some help.
171
00:07:00,778 --> 00:07:02,414
You see, I'm having some
Green card problems
172
00:07:02,437 --> 00:07:03,469
And your
Influence...
173
00:07:03,492 --> 00:07:05,320
- hey, buddy.
Look at you.
174
00:07:06,972 --> 00:07:08,449
You call
This obese?
175
00:07:08,472 --> 00:07:10,365
This is
Husky at best.
176
00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:12,791
Now you go find me a
Fatter kid or a smaller shirt.
177
00:07:12,814 --> 00:07:14,133
Now.
178
00:07:14,155 --> 00:07:16,804
Have you seen
The buffet table?
179
00:07:22,392 --> 00:07:24,029
- please state
Your name.
180
00:07:24,051 --> 00:07:25,753
- elka ostrovsky.
181
00:07:25,776 --> 00:07:28,276
I'm single.
182
00:07:28,299 --> 00:07:31,979
Very single.
183
00:07:32,002 --> 00:07:33,800
A capricorn.
184
00:07:33,823 --> 00:07:37,087
And I love nights
Curled up with a book,
185
00:07:37,111 --> 00:07:41,163
And a
Special someone.
186
00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:48,581
Actually, it was my
Late husband's wishes
187
00:07:48,604 --> 00:07:51,295
That the stolen
Items remain hidden.
188
00:07:51,317 --> 00:07:56,551
I'm powerless in the
Presence of a real man.
189
00:07:58,628 --> 00:08:02,693
- I used to be, too.
190
00:08:02,716 --> 00:08:04,991
- mrs. Ostrovsky,
You continued to honor
191
00:08:05,014 --> 00:08:07,066
Your late husband's wishes
After his passing?
192
00:08:07,089 --> 00:08:08,981
- oh, yes.
193
00:08:09,004 --> 00:08:11,601
Those were
Not easy years.
194
00:08:11,623 --> 00:08:15,111
So, so alone.
195
00:08:15,134 --> 00:08:18,293
So in need
Of comfort.
196
00:08:20,658 --> 00:08:23,977
- juror number eight,
Are you okay?
197
00:08:25,926 --> 00:08:28,106
You seem to be
Breathing heavy.
198
00:08:28,129 --> 00:08:31,108
It's creepy
And distracting.
199
00:08:31,130 --> 00:08:33,981
- doing fine,
Your honor.
200
00:08:34,004 --> 00:08:35,960
Just fine.
201
00:08:35,982 --> 00:08:39,728
And the witness
May continue...
202
00:08:39,751 --> 00:08:41,760
As long as
She likes.
203
00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:53,552
- wow, it sounds like
204
00:08:53,574 --> 00:08:55,978
The prosecution has
A pretty strong case.
205
00:08:56,001 --> 00:08:57,638
- whatever.
206
00:08:57,661 --> 00:08:59,489
- you don't seem very upset.
- right?
207
00:08:59,512 --> 00:09:02,107
I mean, the case goes
To the jury tomorrow.
208
00:09:02,130 --> 00:09:04,182
She keeps saying she's
Got an ace up her sleeve.
209
00:09:04,206 --> 00:09:05,364
- not an ace.
210
00:09:05,388 --> 00:09:07,599
A letter.
211
00:09:07,622 --> 00:09:10,856
From juror
Number eight.
212
00:09:10,879 --> 00:09:13,218
- "Meet me in the
Second floor broom closet
213
00:09:13,242 --> 00:09:14,559
Tomorrow before court.
214
00:09:14,582 --> 00:09:17,433
I'll have my driver
Drop me off a little early."
215
00:09:17,456 --> 00:09:18,518
- your driver?
216
00:09:18,541 --> 00:09:20,689
He sounds rich.
217
00:09:20,712 --> 00:09:21,807
On the other hand,
How rich could he be
218
00:09:21,830 --> 00:09:24,457
If he couldn't
Get off jury duty?
219
00:09:24,479 --> 00:09:26,084
- you're seriously
Going to go
220
00:09:26,107 --> 00:09:27,681
Into a broom closet
With a juror?
221
00:09:27,704 --> 00:09:29,085
Isn't that
Jury tampering?
222
00:09:29,108 --> 00:09:33,620
- it is if you're
Doing it right.
223
00:09:33,643 --> 00:09:34,609
- elka!
224
00:09:34,632 --> 00:09:35,663
- what?
225
00:09:35,686 --> 00:09:37,770
Flirting with the guy
Was your idea.
226
00:09:37,793 --> 00:09:39,813
- yeah, but I meant
Just flirting.
227
00:09:39,836 --> 00:09:41,409
- and you could
Get into trouble.
228
00:09:41,432 --> 00:09:43,197
I say avoid
The jury tampering
229
00:09:43,220 --> 00:09:44,985
And just pray for
A light sentence.
230
00:09:45,009 --> 00:09:46,740
- I don't
Need prayer.
231
00:09:46,763 --> 00:09:50,252
I've got my
Broom closet.
232
00:09:50,276 --> 00:09:51,370
- broom closet?
233
00:09:51,393 --> 00:09:52,455
Both of
You standing?
234
00:09:52,479 --> 00:09:56,256
I object.
Morally and logistically.
235
00:09:56,279 --> 00:09:57,978
- how far are
You willing to go?
236
00:09:58,001 --> 00:10:02,257
- oh, pretty far.
I'm desperate.
237
00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:05,854
Also, it's
Been a while.
238
00:10:20,926 --> 00:10:23,829
Justice has
Been serviced.
239
00:10:27,024 --> 00:10:28,916
- I wonder how long
The jury will deliberate.
240
00:10:28,940 --> 00:10:30,321
- doesn't matter to me.
241
00:10:30,344 --> 00:10:32,875
- did you...
242
00:10:32,898 --> 00:10:36,951
- I met with a certain juror on
A subject of mutual interest.
243
00:10:39,601 --> 00:10:40,953
- all right, I have
Important breaking news
244
00:10:40,976 --> 00:10:42,262
And it's not
Even about me.
245
00:10:42,285 --> 00:10:43,730
- have you heard
Something about the trial?
246
00:10:43,753 --> 00:10:45,102
- it's about joy.
247
00:10:45,126 --> 00:10:47,529
Your the governor's hooker.
- what?
248
00:10:47,552 --> 00:10:49,189
- well, there's a
Picture of you on his lap,
249
00:10:49,212 --> 00:10:51,584
It's the lead story on
Channel seven's website.
250
00:10:51,607 --> 00:10:54,872
- "Gov in photo scandal
With mystery straddler?"
251
00:10:54,895 --> 00:10:57,427
- well, I had to sit
On top of him for leverage.
252
00:10:57,450 --> 00:10:59,949
I practically needed a
Chain saw to thin those brows,
253
00:10:59,972 --> 00:11:02,727
I had to use a
Number seven tweezer.
254
00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:06,622
If you were in the business,
You'd know how extreme that was.
255
00:11:06,645 --> 00:11:08,249
God, this is terrible.
What am I gonna do?
256
00:11:08,272 --> 00:11:09,367
- no, it's okay.
It's okay.
257
00:11:09,390 --> 00:11:10,644
You can't
See your face.
258
00:11:10,668 --> 00:11:12,623
- oh, it's her all right.
Look at the hand.
259
00:11:12,646 --> 00:11:15,561
- oh, yeah.
260
00:11:15,583 --> 00:11:18,721
- what about my hand?
- it looks like a man hand.
261
00:11:18,744 --> 00:11:20,254
- no, it doesn't.
262
00:11:20,277 --> 00:11:21,372
It's just the
Angle of the picture.
263
00:11:21,395 --> 00:11:22,872
My hand is
Foreshortened.
264
00:11:22,895 --> 00:11:25,777
- does that mean it
Looks like a dude's?
265
00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:26,959
- come on.
Look at her legs.
266
00:11:26,981 --> 00:11:28,779
That's obviously
Not a man's leg.
267
00:11:28,801 --> 00:11:31,587
- yes, those belong to
A beautiful, sexy woman.
268
00:11:31,611 --> 00:11:32,801
- thank you.
269
00:11:32,824 --> 00:11:34,589
- who will reveal her steamy
Affair with the governor
270
00:11:34,613 --> 00:11:38,516
on my show,
Oh, hi, ohio.
271
00:11:38,538 --> 00:11:40,240
- but you know I'm
Just plucking his eye brows.
272
00:11:40,263 --> 00:11:41,389
- well, that's not
What it looks like.
273
00:11:41,411 --> 00:11:43,145
Oh, please say that
You're his hooker.
274
00:11:43,167 --> 00:11:45,635
- no, then I'll never
Get my green card.
275
00:11:45,658 --> 00:11:46,976
I'll go on your show
And tell the truth.
276
00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:48,189
- the truth?
277
00:11:48,212 --> 00:11:51,510
Well, my viewers
Deserve better than that.
278
00:11:51,533 --> 00:11:53,426
- hasn't the governor's
Office said anything yet?
279
00:11:53,448 --> 00:11:54,703
- no, not a word.
280
00:11:54,726 --> 00:11:56,937
So I could own this story
If you'd just play ball.
281
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:59,588
- like a dude.
282
00:11:59,611 --> 00:12:01,726
- no, and
That's final.
283
00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:04,855
- ladies and gentlemen,
284
00:12:04,878 --> 00:12:07,984
The jury has
Reached a verdict.
285
00:12:08,007 --> 00:12:10,953
What did I say
About looking at me?
286
00:12:10,976 --> 00:12:13,688
That messed up face
Is freaking me out.
287
00:12:25,823 --> 00:12:29,151
We the jury find
The defendant, elka ostrovsky...
288
00:12:29,174 --> 00:12:31,833
- watch me
Act surprised.
289
00:12:31,856 --> 00:12:34,643
- guilty.
290
00:12:34,666 --> 00:12:37,772
- what?
291
00:12:37,795 --> 00:12:40,518
- defendant will remain
Free on bail until sentencing.
292
00:12:40,541 --> 00:12:42,784
And defense counsel
Will be responsible
293
00:12:42,806 --> 00:12:46,041
For all ancillary court costs,
Including, but not limited,
294
00:12:46,064 --> 00:12:48,946
To the $800 the court
Spent on this damn weave.
295
00:12:53,949 --> 00:12:55,013
- now don't panic.
296
00:12:55,036 --> 00:12:56,385
The judge still has
A lot of discretion
297
00:12:56,408 --> 00:12:57,885
When it comes
To sentencing.
298
00:12:57,908 --> 00:12:59,226
Now if you'll all
Testify on her behalf,
299
00:12:59,248 --> 00:13:00,600
And I'll turn
On the charm.
300
00:13:00,623 --> 00:13:04,143
- is it possible your face has
Gotten even less attractive?
301
00:13:04,166 --> 00:13:05,643
- it has?
302
00:13:05,666 --> 00:13:07,240
Oh, damn.
303
00:13:07,264 --> 00:13:10,145
I think I'm having an
Allergic reaction to the salve.
304
00:13:10,168 --> 00:13:12,221
- are you... Crying?
305
00:13:12,243 --> 00:13:14,105
- some of it is
My stitches weeping.
306
00:13:14,128 --> 00:13:15,253
But...
307
00:13:15,276 --> 00:13:16,978
Yeah, I am
A little upset.
308
00:13:17,001 --> 00:13:18,861
Women are being
So mean to me.
309
00:13:18,884 --> 00:13:20,137
Nobody's
Opening a door,
310
00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:21,512
Or holding
An elevator.
311
00:13:21,535 --> 00:13:25,406
I had to tear open my own
Sugar packet at starbuck's!
312
00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:27,992
I need a moment.
313
00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:29,205
- what went wrong?
314
00:13:29,228 --> 00:13:31,377
I thought you tampered
With juror number eight.
315
00:13:31,399 --> 00:13:33,707
- I tampered the
Heck out of him.
316
00:13:33,729 --> 00:13:36,548
- oh, there he is now.
Let's go get him.
317
00:13:36,571 --> 00:13:38,623
- you!
- I thought you liked her.
318
00:13:38,647 --> 00:13:40,794
- who?
319
00:13:40,818 --> 00:13:43,508
Hello.
320
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:45,041
- sorry, he's having
A little episode.
321
00:13:45,064 --> 00:13:46,765
It happens from
Time to time.
322
00:13:46,787 --> 00:13:48,234
- what do you mean,
"An episode?"
323
00:13:48,257 --> 00:13:49,607
- he suffers from
A condition called
324
00:13:49,630 --> 00:13:51,746
"Transient
Global amnesia."
325
00:13:51,768 --> 00:13:53,086
If he gets
Over stimulated
326
00:13:53,109 --> 00:13:55,449
He loses his
Short-term memory for a while.
327
00:13:55,472 --> 00:13:56,502
Something must
Have gotten him
328
00:13:56,525 --> 00:14:01,069
Excited this morning
And triggered it.
329
00:14:01,091 --> 00:14:02,377
- he forgot everything?
330
00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:06,495
- everything that happened
Between breakfast and lunch.
331
00:14:06,519 --> 00:14:08,922
- you poor bow-tied
Son-of-a-gun.
332
00:14:08,945 --> 00:14:13,584
You don't even know
What you had.
333
00:14:13,607 --> 00:14:15,775
- hello.
334
00:14:27,686 --> 00:14:30,058
- you couldn't sleep either?
- mm-mm.
335
00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:31,431
I'm still trying
To figure out
336
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:32,516
What I'm gonna say at
Elka's sentencing hearing.
337
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:33,632
I'm so
Scared for her.
338
00:14:33,655 --> 00:14:35,485
- yeah, me too.
339
00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:36,890
It's so hard
To believe that
340
00:14:36,913 --> 00:14:39,316
They could actually
Send her to jail.
341
00:14:39,339 --> 00:14:40,338
- I know.
342
00:14:40,361 --> 00:14:41,838
Prison.
343
00:14:41,861 --> 00:14:43,817
It's horrible.
344
00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:46,914
- well, not always.
345
00:14:46,938 --> 00:14:48,990
on edge of tomorrow,
When honor st. Raven
346
00:14:49,013 --> 00:14:51,193
Went in for
Double-murder,
347
00:14:51,215 --> 00:14:52,788
She was released
After six weeks
348
00:14:52,811 --> 00:14:55,247
For saving the warden's children
From an axe murderess.
349
00:14:55,270 --> 00:14:56,429
And not
Only that,
350
00:14:56,451 --> 00:14:58,695
She earned a degree
In advanced bionics
351
00:14:58,718 --> 00:15:01,314
From the yale university
Of correspondence.
352
00:15:01,336 --> 00:15:05,623
So sometimes prison is
Just what you make of it.
353
00:15:05,647 --> 00:15:08,019
- elka's gonna be there
More than six weeks.
354
00:15:08,041 --> 00:15:10,732
- ah, well then she
Can get two degrees.
355
00:15:10,755 --> 00:15:11,689
Sorry.
356
00:15:11,713 --> 00:15:13,829
I joke when
I'm scared.
357
00:15:13,851 --> 00:15:15,776
I guess I figure that
If I act as if
358
00:15:15,799 --> 00:15:18,202
It isn't serious,
Maybe it won't be.
359
00:15:18,225 --> 00:15:19,895
- unfortunately, it is.
360
00:15:19,918 --> 00:15:21,714
- oh.
You too, huh?
361
00:15:21,738 --> 00:15:26,121
- I keep picturing elka
Alone in a cold, dark cell.
362
00:15:26,143 --> 00:15:30,176
But that image has lost
Its happy glow for me.
363
00:15:30,199 --> 00:15:31,484
- you know, if
None of us can sleep
364
00:15:31,507 --> 00:15:33,177
I bet elka's still up.
365
00:15:33,199 --> 00:15:34,453
- her light's still on.
366
00:15:34,476 --> 00:15:37,550
- she's probably going
Crazy with anxiety.
367
00:15:37,573 --> 00:15:40,104
Pour her a cup of tea,
I'll go get her.
368
00:15:40,127 --> 00:15:41,542
- god, what a day.
369
00:15:41,564 --> 00:15:42,690
Elka getting
Convicted,
370
00:15:42,713 --> 00:15:46,331
And you literally
Man-handling the governor.
371
00:15:46,353 --> 00:15:48,980
God, I could use that as
A lead-in to my story.
372
00:15:49,003 --> 00:15:51,725
- there is
No story.
373
00:15:51,748 --> 00:15:53,226
I just wish I could get
The governor's office
374
00:15:53,249 --> 00:15:54,535
To return
My phone calls
375
00:15:54,558 --> 00:15:56,898
Before someone id's me
And I get deported.
376
00:15:56,921 --> 00:15:58,622
- now, see, this is why
You have to strike first.
377
00:15:58,645 --> 00:15:59,962
Now let me get
Your story out.
378
00:15:59,986 --> 00:16:01,143
Tell the world about
379
00:16:01,166 --> 00:16:04,273
The governor's
"Sex for amnesty" scheme.
380
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:07,146
- there was no
"Sex for amnesty" scheme.
381
00:16:07,169 --> 00:16:10,531
Mostly because I didn't
Think of it fast enough.
382
00:16:10,553 --> 00:16:12,925
Why can't I just say
I was plucking his brows?
383
00:16:12,948 --> 00:16:14,138
- well, why say that
When I can
384
00:16:14,161 --> 00:16:15,894
Turn you into
Something much better.
385
00:16:15,917 --> 00:16:17,458
A celebrity victim.
386
00:16:17,481 --> 00:16:19,310
Now say what you will
About our country,
387
00:16:19,332 --> 00:16:21,449
But we do not
Deport our celebrities.
388
00:16:21,472 --> 00:16:25,919
No, at worst, we exile
Them to reality shows.
389
00:16:25,941 --> 00:16:27,834
- she's gone.
390
00:16:27,857 --> 00:16:28,952
Elka's gone.
391
00:16:28,975 --> 00:16:30,676
- well, where
Did she go?
392
00:16:30,699 --> 00:16:32,336
- I don't know, but she's
Gone and she left a note.
393
00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:33,422
- what's it say?
394
00:16:33,445 --> 00:16:35,498
- "I'm gone."
395
00:16:35,521 --> 00:16:36,710
- that's it?
396
00:16:36,733 --> 00:16:39,583
- "P.S. Sorry to go without
Saying good-bye,
397
00:16:39,607 --> 00:16:41,148
But when I realized
My sentence depended on
398
00:16:41,171 --> 00:16:44,277
Whatever half-baked testimony
You three bird-brains cooked up,
399
00:16:44,300 --> 00:16:47,916
I decided to take my chances
And light out for the territory.
400
00:16:47,939 --> 00:16:50,023
- what's that?
"Light out for the territory?"
401
00:16:50,047 --> 00:16:52,162
- it means
She went west.
402
00:16:52,186 --> 00:16:54,207
"P.P.S. There's more
Internet pictures
403
00:16:54,230 --> 00:16:56,856
Of the governor getting off
With lady french fry."
404
00:16:56,879 --> 00:16:59,091
- oh, my god, no.
405
00:16:59,113 --> 00:17:00,208
- lady french fry.
406
00:17:00,231 --> 00:17:01,677
That's a new one.
407
00:17:01,700 --> 00:17:04,232
- "P.P.P.S. Joy,
I may not see you again,
408
00:17:04,255 --> 00:17:07,265
"And I've been sitting on
"Lady french fry" for a week.
409
00:17:07,288 --> 00:17:08,445
"I had to get it
Off my chest.
410
00:17:08,468 --> 00:17:13,393
If you had a chest,
You'd know what I mean."
411
00:17:13,416 --> 00:17:15,564
- she loved to
Insult my chest.
412
00:17:15,587 --> 00:17:16,746
And my hair.
413
00:17:16,769 --> 00:17:19,652
And my inability
To hold onto a man.
414
00:17:19,674 --> 00:17:21,535
And my intelligence.
415
00:17:21,558 --> 00:17:23,929
And my morals.
416
00:17:23,952 --> 00:17:26,835
She's like
A mother to me.
417
00:17:26,858 --> 00:17:30,219
- you don't think she's
Actually gone west, do you?
418
00:17:30,242 --> 00:17:32,230
- what state is
West of ohio?
419
00:17:32,254 --> 00:17:37,244
- I wanna
Say maryland.
420
00:17:37,266 --> 00:17:38,424
- well, she's
Out there somewhere,
421
00:17:38,447 --> 00:17:40,755
And we have to find her
Before the police do.
422
00:17:40,778 --> 00:17:43,425
Where would she
Go to hide out?
423
00:17:49,398 --> 00:17:51,993
- if you're back here,
Who's driving the wagon?
424
00:17:52,016 --> 00:17:53,494
- the horse,
Naturally.
425
00:17:53,517 --> 00:17:55,409
Relax thyself.
426
00:17:55,432 --> 00:17:57,867
She knows
The way.
427
00:17:57,890 --> 00:17:59,783
- so where
We're going,
428
00:17:59,805 --> 00:18:03,104
I'm completely cut off
From the outside world?
429
00:18:03,127 --> 00:18:05,945
- indeed.
430
00:18:05,968 --> 00:18:07,669
- works for me.
30855
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