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1
00:00:11,612 --> 00:00:14,013
Do you want a bite, Daddy?
2
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:16,286
No, thanks, honey.
3
00:00:16,287 --> 00:00:20,750
If Daddy's going to compete for the
Chicago hot dog eating championship,
4
00:00:20,751 --> 00:00:22,653
he's got to be hungry.
5
00:00:23,354 --> 00:00:24,725
Crazy hungry!
6
00:00:25,726 --> 00:00:28,198
Jim, just eat something!
7
00:00:28,199 --> 00:00:30,531
Last year you passed out
on the way to the contest.
8
00:00:31,732 --> 00:00:32,802
I took a short nap.
9
00:00:32,803 --> 00:00:34,235
You were driving!
10
00:00:36,137 --> 00:00:38,469
Well, if you don't use
those airbags, it's a waste.
11
00:00:40,271 --> 00:00:41,572
(SNIFFING)
12
00:00:42,573 --> 00:00:44,474
I smell donuts.
13
00:00:44,475 --> 00:00:45,546
Hey.
14
00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:49,279
That's incredible.
15
00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:52,452
Well, when you starve yourself for
two days, your senses get heightened.
16
00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:54,655
You know, I'm like Ray
Charles, but with smelling.
17
00:00:56,387 --> 00:00:59,160
Cheryl, Dana, offspring...
18
00:01:00,291 --> 00:01:02,763
Um, Mr. Second Place,
is it?
19
00:01:04,465 --> 00:01:07,567
Excuse me, you expect
to eat more hot dogs than me
20
00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:09,569
when you fill your belly
full of donuts?
21
00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:13,643
It's my strategy.
I'm stretching my stomach.
22
00:01:13,644 --> 00:01:17,177
Yeah, when did you start that
strategy, when you were 12?
23
00:01:17,178 --> 00:01:21,311
Yes, indeed. About the same
time you started losing your hair.
24
00:01:21,312 --> 00:01:25,415
Well, at least I have
someone to share my life with.
25
00:01:25,416 --> 00:01:28,489
I think your longest relationship
was with Mrs. Butterworth.
26
00:01:30,321 --> 00:01:32,622
Whom I think
you're still seeing.
27
00:01:32,623 --> 00:01:35,495
All right, would you guys
just stop it?
28
00:01:35,496 --> 00:01:38,468
Kids, go put your shoes on.
We're going to leave in a minute.
29
00:01:38,469 --> 00:01:42,502
So, you're going bald, you're
sleeping with syrup, and go.
30
00:01:42,503 --> 00:01:44,774
Mint green is definitely...
31
00:01:44,775 --> 00:01:47,877
Could you please
stop the garbage talk?
32
00:01:47,878 --> 00:01:51,281
Cheryl, it's not called garbage
talk. It's called trash talk.
33
00:01:51,282 --> 00:01:55,345
It's part of competition, but you wouldn't
understand that because you're a woman.
34
00:01:55,346 --> 00:01:57,518
Just like Andy.
Advantage, Jim.
35
00:01:58,889 --> 00:02:01,451
Okay, because I'm a woman?
36
00:02:01,452 --> 00:02:03,623
This never gets old.
37
00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:07,157
Women aren't natural competitors
like men, that's all. It's a fact, baby.
38
00:02:07,158 --> 00:02:09,659
Yay. Jim's first crackpot
theory of the day.
39
00:02:09,660 --> 00:02:11,631
Yay!
40
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:13,663
See, you know I'm right, too.
41
00:02:13,664 --> 00:02:15,505
Hold on. Hold...
42
00:02:15,506 --> 00:02:16,807
(SNIFFING)
43
00:02:18,509 --> 00:02:20,140
A neighbor is cooking bacon.
44
00:02:23,914 --> 00:02:25,175
And muffins.
45
00:02:25,176 --> 00:02:26,246
(SNIFFS)
46
00:02:26,247 --> 00:02:27,778
Blueberry muffins.
No, walnut.
47
00:02:29,580 --> 00:02:30,851
And the woman baking
48
00:02:32,883 --> 00:02:34,154
is crying.
49
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:42,763
JIM: Oh, baby!
50
00:02:47,638 --> 00:02:49,940
ANNOUNCER: Contestants,
take your seats.
51
00:02:51,502 --> 00:02:53,503
Welcome to the State Street Mall
52
00:02:53,504 --> 00:02:56,746
and Demon Dogs' annual
hot dog eating contest.
53
00:02:56,747 --> 00:02:58,279
(APPLAUDING)
54
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:02,352
Remember, the winner will
become the spokesperson
55
00:03:02,353 --> 00:03:05,316
for Demon Dogs in a local
television commercial.
56
00:03:07,518 --> 00:03:09,260
My own commercial.
57
00:03:10,821 --> 00:03:12,493
Who says a demon
58
00:03:13,594 --> 00:03:15,226
can't go to heaven?
59
00:03:16,527 --> 00:03:20,301
(LAUGHING EVILLY)
60
00:03:30,881 --> 00:03:33,313
(LAUGHING)
61
00:03:33,314 --> 00:03:34,915
What are you doing?
62
00:03:35,846 --> 00:03:37,517
Nothing.
63
00:03:37,518 --> 00:03:39,819
Okay, 12 minutes
stand between you
64
00:03:39,820 --> 00:03:41,822
and glittering local fame.
65
00:03:43,454 --> 00:03:45,696
Contestants, raise your dogs.
66
00:03:46,597 --> 00:03:48,227
You are going down!
67
00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,860
Please. The only thing going
down is my life expectancy.
68
00:03:50,861 --> 00:03:51,902
(CHUCKLES)
69
00:03:52,963 --> 00:03:55,565
Ready, set, eat!
70
00:03:55,566 --> 00:03:56,707
(BLOWS WHISTLE)
71
00:04:32,503 --> 00:04:34,044
(CROWD CHEERING)
72
00:04:48,889 --> 00:04:50,360
(WHISTLE BLOWS)
73
00:04:50,361 --> 00:04:51,992
Time's up. Dogs down.
74
00:04:52,623 --> 00:04:54,624
(LAUGHS)
75
00:04:54,625 --> 00:04:58,798
Hey, Cheryl,
I'm the wiener king!
76
00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,801
Guess that makes you
the wiener queen.
77
00:05:01,702 --> 00:05:03,673
Yeah.
78
00:05:03,674 --> 00:05:05,706
Margie Anderson's married
to a state assemblyman.
79
00:05:07,408 --> 00:05:09,409
And the winner is...
80
00:05:09,410 --> 00:05:12,330
Ah, ah, oh, let me direct that
commercial, because I have a vision for it.
81
00:05:15,085 --> 00:05:17,417
Yoki Hirasaki!
82
00:05:17,418 --> 00:05:18,449
Aah!
83
00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:27,757
(SPUTTERS)
That's impossible!
84
00:05:27,758 --> 00:05:30,561
That girl couldn't fit three
hot dogs end to end in there!
85
00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:34,964
No, she's like a tiny Asian
meat grinder.
86
00:05:34,965 --> 00:05:37,838
I wonder if she has room for
a piece of Andy pie?
87
00:05:40,070 --> 00:05:42,572
Jim, honey, I'm befuddled.
88
00:05:42,573 --> 00:05:46,916
You're a man, and yet you just got
beat by someone who isn't a man.
89
00:05:46,917 --> 00:05:50,450
Which, technically,
makes her a woman.
90
00:05:50,451 --> 00:05:53,523
Dana, that's impossible. Everybody
knows women can't compete,
91
00:05:53,524 --> 00:05:55,385
hence my befuddlement.
92
00:05:55,386 --> 00:05:58,388
Hmm. Well, let me
unbefuddle you, okay?
93
00:05:58,389 --> 00:05:59,989
It was fixed!
Oh, Jim!
94
00:05:59,990 --> 00:06:02,732
It was! Come on, it's obvious
they rigged the contest
95
00:06:02,733 --> 00:06:05,765
because they want a skinny
woman to promote a better image.
96
00:06:05,766 --> 00:06:08,498
A better image than us?
Doubtful.
97
00:06:08,499 --> 00:06:12,042
Excuse me, sir. Can I get a to-go
box for the ones I licked but didn't eat?
98
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:18,708
Daddy?
99
00:06:18,709 --> 00:06:20,610
Yes, my young boy? What?
100
00:06:20,611 --> 00:06:22,913
I'm going to the bathroom.
Want to watch?
101
00:06:24,915 --> 00:06:27,618
Uh, no, thank you, honey.
I caught your morning show.
102
00:06:28,759 --> 00:06:29,860
Okay.
103
00:06:35,696 --> 00:06:37,166
Hey. How's the surround
sound coming along?
104
00:06:37,167 --> 00:06:39,098
Oh, it's gonna be great.
105
00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:40,399
Andy's going to love it.
106
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,171
When we're watching
the Cubs game,
107
00:06:42,172 --> 00:06:44,372
it's gonna be like we're in
Wrigley Field. Check it out.
108
00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:46,606
(STATIC CRACKLING)
109
00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:47,837
Oh! Ugh!
110
00:06:47,838 --> 00:06:51,180
Crap! Well, I'll wait
till Andy gets here.
111
00:06:51,181 --> 00:06:53,583
You know, he's good
with this nerdy stuff.
112
00:06:53,584 --> 00:06:55,646
Yeah, Jim, you're way too
cool to do this right.
113
00:06:57,648 --> 00:06:59,819
Hey, guys, you remember Yoki.
114
00:06:59,820 --> 00:07:01,652
CHERYL AND DANA: Hey!
115
00:07:03,454 --> 00:07:05,595
What the hell?
116
00:07:05,596 --> 00:07:10,099
Look, Jim, it's the winner
of the hot dog-eating contest.
117
00:07:10,100 --> 00:07:13,834
Yeah. Well, nice to, uh,
see you, Yogi.
118
00:07:14,204 --> 00:07:16,005
Yoki.
119
00:07:16,006 --> 00:07:17,668
Oh, I'm sorry.
My boo-boo.
120
00:07:20,771 --> 00:07:22,672
Yeah, um...
121
00:07:22,673 --> 00:07:25,144
Yoki and I struck up a
conversation after the contest,
122
00:07:25,145 --> 00:07:26,917
and now we're doing it.
123
00:07:29,219 --> 00:07:31,050
You know, dating.
124
00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:32,952
And doing it.
125
00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:36,556
Well, I'm telling you,
you two are the cutest couple.
126
00:07:36,557 --> 00:07:40,129
Yeah. I bet you're hell
on a buffet.
127
00:07:40,130 --> 00:07:44,133
Well, it's a pleasure, but Andy and
I are gonna be watching the game.
128
00:07:44,134 --> 00:07:47,667
Oh, actually, Jim, I'm gonna head
over to Yoki's and watch it there.
129
00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:50,140
(STAMMERING) What,
Yoki, you got a big screen TV?
130
00:07:51,041 --> 00:07:53,503
Fifty inches.
Sixty!
131
00:07:53,504 --> 00:07:54,974
And I'm putting in
surround sound.
132
00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:56,706
I'm putting it in right now.
133
00:07:56,707 --> 00:08:00,110
Jim, I'm not going over there
for the home theater experience.
134
00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:05,515
You're gonna love surround
sound. It makes all the difference.
135
00:08:05,516 --> 00:08:06,986
Would you like some help
hooking it up?
136
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:09,118
Yeah, Yoki's great
at this kind of stuff.
137
00:08:09,119 --> 00:08:10,990
She defragged my hard drive...
138
00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:12,593
And then she fixed my computer.
139
00:08:13,864 --> 00:08:15,965
Know what I'm sayin'?
140
00:08:15,966 --> 00:08:17,698
How could they not know
what you're saying?
141
00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:21,731
It'll only take me a second.
142
00:08:21,732 --> 00:08:23,603
I know this unit.
143
00:08:23,604 --> 00:08:25,134
Nah, it's all right. My
son's here. He can help me.
144
00:08:25,135 --> 00:08:28,277
He's kind of an electronic
genius, but thanks.
145
00:08:28,278 --> 00:08:30,140
KYLE: Can somebody wipe me?
146
00:08:31,882 --> 00:08:33,614
Well, like father, like son.
147
00:08:36,046 --> 00:08:38,718
There you go. You just had
the speaker leads reversed.
148
00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:39,749
What?
149
00:08:39,750 --> 00:08:40,850
(MUSIC PLAYING)
150
00:08:40,851 --> 00:08:41,891
(ANDY AND DANA GASP)
151
00:08:41,892 --> 00:08:44,754
Wow, it's like
we're at the movies.
152
00:08:44,755 --> 00:08:47,256
Yoki, hey, it's your
Demon Dog commercial.
153
00:08:47,257 --> 00:08:49,259
YOKI ON TV: Who says a demon
can't go to heaven?
154
00:08:55,636 --> 00:08:57,236
Can you blame me?
155
00:08:57,237 --> 00:09:00,039
I had her in a devil suit
surrounded by hot dogs.
156
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,712
I felt like Hef.
157
00:09:03,574 --> 00:09:04,915
Yoki!
158
00:09:08,949 --> 00:09:12,152
(PLAYING BLUES MUSIC)
159
00:09:18,188 --> 00:09:20,189
Wow, Charlie...
160
00:09:20,190 --> 00:09:23,232
You are really not that good.
161
00:09:23,233 --> 00:09:25,564
It's not like I have
a lot of time to rehearse.
162
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:28,868
I'm pretty busy between my
liquor store and my pizza place.
163
00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:30,800
Welcome to the band.
164
00:09:30,801 --> 00:09:32,602
Thanks.
So glad you're here.
165
00:09:32,603 --> 00:09:34,243
Thanks.
Oh, hey, honey!
166
00:09:34,244 --> 00:09:35,605
(KISSES)
167
00:09:35,606 --> 00:09:37,607
Hey, so we done here?
168
00:09:37,608 --> 00:09:40,149
(STAMMERS) We got another
hour left of rehearsal.
169
00:09:40,150 --> 00:09:42,813
Fine, yeah, okay.
Here, Yoki, have a seat.
170
00:09:43,684 --> 00:09:45,184
(STAMMERING) Wait.
171
00:09:45,185 --> 00:09:47,887
Normally these are
closed rehearsals.
172
00:09:47,888 --> 00:09:49,720
No one's ever wanted
to come, Jim.
173
00:09:51,822 --> 00:09:53,763
Fine. Fine.
174
00:09:53,764 --> 00:09:55,025
Two, three, four.
175
00:09:56,066 --> 00:09:57,968
(PLAYING BLUES MUSIC)
176
00:09:58,699 --> 00:09:59,830
(INAUDIBLE)
177
00:10:04,635 --> 00:10:06,976
Stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop.
178
00:10:06,977 --> 00:10:08,908
Andy, listen, I know
we sound better
179
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,110
when you're not playing,
but what the hell?
180
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,112
Well, it's just that
we were thinking...
181
00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:15,244
We?
Yoki and I.
182
00:10:15,245 --> 00:10:17,146
Yeah, the song's in "G,"
183
00:10:17,147 --> 00:10:20,149
but you're playing the "A" harp.
184
00:10:20,150 --> 00:10:24,253
Since when does your little friend there
know so much about blues harmonica?
185
00:10:24,254 --> 00:10:26,125
Well, I play a little bit.
186
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,627
(CHUCKLING)
Oh, you do?
187
00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,660
Well, I'd love to hear that.
188
00:10:30,661 --> 00:10:31,831
Maybe I should just go.
189
00:10:31,832 --> 00:10:33,362
No, no, no, no.
I'd really love to hear it.
190
00:10:33,363 --> 00:10:34,964
Come on, I insist. I insist.
Come on, take a shot at it.
191
00:10:34,965 --> 00:10:36,706
Come on, baby.
192
00:10:36,707 --> 00:10:38,237
Blow, blow, blow.
193
00:10:38,238 --> 00:10:39,710
All right.
194
00:10:40,410 --> 00:10:41,741
In "E" this time.
195
00:10:41,742 --> 00:10:42,873
In "E."
196
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,114
Let's kick this thing.
197
00:10:45,115 --> 00:10:46,747
(STOMPING)
198
00:10:48,078 --> 00:10:50,020
(BLUES MUSIC PLAYING)
199
00:10:56,126 --> 00:10:58,027
We're done! We're done!
200
00:10:58,028 --> 00:10:59,428
That's it, that's it,
rehearsal's over.
201
00:10:59,429 --> 00:11:01,290
What? Everybody
go! Everybody go!
202
00:11:01,291 --> 00:11:02,531
Rehearsal's over!
Come on, man!
203
00:11:02,993 --> 00:11:04,363
Over! Over!
204
00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:06,196
Yoki, can you give us a minute?
205
00:11:08,038 --> 00:11:10,099
Hey, Yoki? Yoki?
206
00:11:10,100 --> 00:11:12,442
If you ever want to start
a band, here's my card.
207
00:11:13,774 --> 00:11:16,105
Out! Out, everybody!
208
00:11:16,106 --> 00:11:20,179
Jim, what the hell is wrong with
you? Why can't you be nice to her?
209
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,210
I don't want to be nice to her.
210
00:11:21,211 --> 00:11:23,282
Why, 'cause she beat you?
211
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:25,986
The only reason she beat me
is because she's on steroids!
212
00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:30,208
You get her to pee in a cup,
and I'll prove it to you.
213
00:11:31,922 --> 00:11:34,063
That is ridiculous!
214
00:11:34,064 --> 00:11:36,195
What are you talking about?
She's the enemy!
215
00:11:36,196 --> 00:11:37,466
What?
216
00:11:37,467 --> 00:11:40,130
It's like if I was dating
Osama bin Laden.
217
00:11:41,071 --> 00:11:43,873
Okay? You hate him.
218
00:11:43,874 --> 00:11:46,937
I'd be fine with it. We'd
get 25 mil for turning him in.
219
00:11:49,940 --> 00:11:51,912
You would turn in my boyfriend?
220
00:11:54,014 --> 00:11:56,385
What if I loved him?
221
00:11:56,386 --> 00:11:58,087
Are you listening to yourself?
222
00:11:58,088 --> 00:11:59,348
I'm sick of hearing myself.
223
00:11:59,349 --> 00:12:02,121
Jim, I'm dating again,
and I'm ecstatic.
224
00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:04,824
I thought you more than anyone
would be happy for me.
225
00:12:04,825 --> 00:12:07,326
I don't like her, I don't
like her, I don't like her.
226
00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:09,899
And I don't like that she
messes up our rehearsals.
227
00:12:09,900 --> 00:12:11,230
Really?
Yes.
228
00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:14,063
Oh. Well, great.
Because we're a box set.
229
00:12:14,064 --> 00:12:15,364
Oh, yeah?
230
00:12:15,365 --> 00:12:17,736
If you don't need her, then
you obviously don't need me.
231
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:21,370
Hey! Hey, I got a friend who
owns a liquor store and a pizza joint.
232
00:12:21,371 --> 00:12:22,843
I don't need anybody!
233
00:12:26,476 --> 00:12:29,479
Your brother's a big, dumb
jerk with a tiny, dumb girlfriend.
234
00:12:31,521 --> 00:12:33,853
Beets? You're making beets?
235
00:12:33,854 --> 00:12:36,186
Crap on a cracker, is
this world going to hell?
236
00:12:38,188 --> 00:12:40,830
Jim, honey, would you like
a popsicle?
237
00:12:40,831 --> 00:12:42,991
Sometimes that helps Kyle
when he's throwing a tantrum.
238
00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:46,466
I am not five years old.
239
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:49,269
You have a red one?
240
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,140
Oh, you know what?
241
00:12:51,141 --> 00:12:52,541
I think Gracie ate
the last red one.
242
00:12:52,542 --> 00:12:54,243
Purple?
No.
243
00:12:54,244 --> 00:12:56,245
Yellow?
Sorry.
244
00:12:56,246 --> 00:12:58,078
What else do you have?
245
00:12:58,979 --> 00:13:00,479
Organic orange mango?
246
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:01,812
Then forget it!
247
00:13:02,853 --> 00:13:04,013
Forget it!
248
00:13:04,014 --> 00:13:05,815
Can't have a popsicle
in this house!
249
00:13:05,816 --> 00:13:07,457
There's beets smelling
the whole house up!
250
00:13:09,990 --> 00:13:11,161
I'll take this one.
251
00:13:13,363 --> 00:13:16,566
All right. Honey, do you want to
talk about your problem with Andy?
252
00:13:18,428 --> 00:13:20,970
I am not having
a problem with Andy.
253
00:13:20,971 --> 00:13:23,272
It's that Yoki.
254
00:13:23,273 --> 00:13:27,477
Okay, but since Andy's been seeing
Yoki, he's been around a lot less.
255
00:13:28,438 --> 00:13:29,809
Yeah!
256
00:13:33,113 --> 00:13:34,984
I'm just saying
257
00:13:34,985 --> 00:13:36,946
that deep down you and Andy...
258
00:13:36,947 --> 00:13:40,149
Mmm-mmm, no, no, no. This is what
you guys do. This is what you women do.
259
00:13:40,150 --> 00:13:42,051
This is what you like to do.
260
00:13:42,052 --> 00:13:44,253
You like to dig deep down.
261
00:13:44,254 --> 00:13:46,595
You like to go
underneath the surface.
262
00:13:46,596 --> 00:13:49,359
But anybody that knows me
knows that there's nothing there!
263
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:52,462
So quit drilling!
264
00:13:54,004 --> 00:13:58,337
I hate Yoki, I hate beets,
and I hate this popsicle!
265
00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:00,010
Is there some law against sugar?
266
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:03,873
All right, I just wish
you had told me sooner.
267
00:14:03,874 --> 00:14:05,244
You knew about the beets!
268
00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:09,548
No. I invited Andy and Yoki
to dinner tomorrow night.
269
00:14:09,549 --> 00:14:10,951
(SPITS)
270
00:14:13,453 --> 00:14:15,986
You invite mine enemy to dinner?
271
00:14:17,087 --> 00:14:18,958
Cheryl, that is ridiculous!
272
00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:20,629
That's like if...
273
00:14:20,630 --> 00:14:22,491
What if I was dating
Osama bin Laden,
274
00:14:22,492 --> 00:14:24,233
and I brought him home
for dinner?
275
00:14:24,234 --> 00:14:26,365
How would you feel about that?
276
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:27,867
I don't know, honey.
Is it serious?
277
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:31,871
I wouldn't bring him home if
it was just a fling, Cheryl.
278
00:14:33,443 --> 00:14:35,644
Okay, Jim,
279
00:14:35,645 --> 00:14:37,576
if this is really about Yoki,
280
00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:41,381
I bet you can beat her
at being a bigger person.
281
00:14:41,912 --> 00:14:43,482
Huh?
282
00:14:43,483 --> 00:14:46,556
I bet my big, strong, handsome
husband can win at that.
283
00:14:51,191 --> 00:14:53,022
Huh?
284
00:14:53,023 --> 00:14:57,397
Well, I guess if I can force
down this frozen disaster...
285
00:14:59,529 --> 00:15:01,470
I can probably be
the bigger man.
286
00:15:01,471 --> 00:15:03,303
Aw, thank you, honey.
287
00:15:04,534 --> 00:15:06,136
No riddle. What a rip.
288
00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:15,015
Hey, Jim.
289
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:18,918
Bigger man, bigger man.
290
00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:21,650
Glad you made it.
291
00:15:21,651 --> 00:15:24,153
Ah, thanks so much
for having us over.
292
00:15:24,154 --> 00:15:25,624
That is really big of you.
293
00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:28,998
Hey, I'm a big man.
294
00:15:28,999 --> 00:15:32,301
You know what I was thinking? How
about tomorrow we go out to lunch?
295
00:15:32,302 --> 00:15:36,405
Yeah, we go to the park, knock back
a few beers, fall asleep in the sun?
296
00:15:36,406 --> 00:15:39,139
It's been a long time since
we've had a hobo lunch.
297
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,541
Oh, you know what, though?
298
00:15:42,542 --> 00:15:45,614
Yoki and Scottie Pippen have a
publicity thing at the hot dog place.
299
00:15:45,615 --> 00:15:47,317
I should really be there
for that.
300
00:15:49,019 --> 00:15:52,251
Yeah, hey, great.
It sounds like a lot of fun.
301
00:15:52,252 --> 00:15:54,652
I'm sure there's plenty of
guys in the park I can drink with.
302
00:15:57,557 --> 00:15:59,458
Hey, uh, there she is.
(CHUCKLES)
303
00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:02,061
Honey, your steak's almost done.
304
00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:04,594
It's thick and hot.
Just the way you like it.
305
00:16:07,337 --> 00:16:09,239
All we've done is hold hands.
306
00:16:11,741 --> 00:16:14,044
Careful. That one's
starting to burn.
307
00:16:16,546 --> 00:16:18,078
That's called searing.
308
00:16:19,349 --> 00:16:21,081
Be a bigger man,
be a bigger man.
309
00:16:23,213 --> 00:16:25,614
Hey, uh, Yoko, listen.
310
00:16:25,615 --> 00:16:28,087
Yoki.
Yoki.
311
00:16:28,088 --> 00:16:30,489
I want to congratulate you
on your victory.
312
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,561
Thank you.
313
00:16:32,562 --> 00:16:34,593
Yeah, and I'm really sorry that it
was marred with such controversy.
314
00:16:34,594 --> 00:16:38,097
What controversy? I won that
fair and square.
315
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:42,371
Oh! Yeah. Grand jury's gonna
get a good laugh on that one.
316
00:16:42,372 --> 00:16:45,074
Look, Jim, if you have a problem
with me, why don't you just say it?
317
00:16:45,075 --> 00:16:47,076
I don't have a problem with you.
318
00:16:47,077 --> 00:16:49,278
I'm really happy
that Andy has got a girl
319
00:16:49,279 --> 00:16:52,242
who's got, you know,
a gift for freakish eating.
320
00:16:53,543 --> 00:16:55,244
Is that supposed to be
a compliment?
321
00:16:55,245 --> 00:16:58,017
Of course it is.
I'm a big man.
322
00:16:59,389 --> 00:17:02,322
With a little, tiny stomach.
(CHUCKLES)
323
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:14,163
Ha! I won!
324
00:17:14,164 --> 00:17:16,335
That shows you it was
a fluke the other day!
325
00:17:16,336 --> 00:17:17,537
(BURPS)
326
00:17:19,209 --> 00:17:20,340
(DEEPER BURP)
327
00:17:22,272 --> 00:17:24,244
Wow, I heard that
from all the way inside.
328
00:17:33,153 --> 00:17:34,523
Biscuits?
329
00:17:34,524 --> 00:17:36,685
I'll have two.
I'll have three.
330
00:17:36,686 --> 00:17:39,289
Cheryl! We're gonna need
more biscuits!
331
00:17:44,094 --> 00:17:45,595
Guys, guys, guys!
332
00:17:46,566 --> 00:17:48,297
There's corn.
333
00:17:48,298 --> 00:17:50,670
(CHILDREN CLAMORING)
334
00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:54,843
DANA: Go, go, go, go, go!
335
00:17:54,844 --> 00:17:56,176
Go, go!
336
00:17:57,177 --> 00:17:58,577
Daddy, come on, you can do it!
337
00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:00,310
Daddy, Daddy, eat!
338
00:18:05,185 --> 00:18:07,616
(CHEERING CONTINUES)
339
00:18:07,617 --> 00:18:09,519
Come on, Daddy!
Go, go!
340
00:18:11,521 --> 00:18:12,621
(CHOKES)
341
00:18:12,622 --> 00:18:13,763
Beets?
342
00:18:14,424 --> 00:18:15,565
Gross.
343
00:18:18,168 --> 00:18:19,428
Ugh!
344
00:18:19,429 --> 00:18:21,170
Oh!
345
00:18:21,171 --> 00:18:24,473
Hey, hey, hey, what
are you doing? Stop!
346
00:18:24,474 --> 00:18:28,307
They're gonna have to pump
my stomach before I quit!
347
00:18:28,308 --> 00:18:30,180
He'll be fine
after we pump his stomach.
348
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,612
(JIM GROANING)
349
00:18:39,889 --> 00:18:41,891
I am not using the bedpan!
350
00:18:48,858 --> 00:18:51,500
Hey. Can I come in?
351
00:18:51,501 --> 00:18:53,632
Oh, it's you.
352
00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:56,236
It's weird seeing you in here
when it's not St. Patrick's Day.
353
00:18:57,767 --> 00:18:59,608
Yeah.
354
00:18:59,609 --> 00:19:03,612
And I'm not cuffed
to the bed, either.
355
00:19:03,613 --> 00:19:07,247
Hey, Yoki wanted me to tell you that
she's really hoping you're doing okay.
356
00:19:07,677 --> 00:19:08,847
Oh, yeah?
357
00:19:08,848 --> 00:19:11,480
Yeah.
She's a nice girl, Jim.
358
00:19:11,481 --> 00:19:13,482
She's okay, I guess.
359
00:19:13,483 --> 00:19:15,785
Well, if she's okay, man,
then what's the problem?
360
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,257
There's no problem.
361
00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:20,429
No, no, something is going on.
362
00:19:20,430 --> 00:19:22,461
You went crazy today.
363
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:24,364
They found a spoon
in your X-ray.
364
00:19:26,766 --> 00:19:28,537
There's nothing going on.
I told you.
365
00:19:28,538 --> 00:19:29,668
Will you knock it off?
366
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:32,441
Mmm. Seems they pumped
everything out of you,
367
00:19:32,442 --> 00:19:34,374
including the guts
to tell the truth.
368
00:19:35,805 --> 00:19:38,807
You know what? Now you're
starting to sound like Cheryl.
369
00:19:38,808 --> 00:19:43,283
All right? Stop digging. There's
nothing there. I'm all shell!
370
00:19:44,814 --> 00:19:45,954
Okay.
371
00:19:45,955 --> 00:19:48,357
Well, I was doing some thinking.
372
00:19:48,358 --> 00:19:51,290
Actually, it was Yoki
who pointed it out.
373
00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:53,722
And, uh, well...
374
00:19:53,723 --> 00:19:56,525
It seems that I've been spending
too much time away from my friend,
375
00:19:56,526 --> 00:19:58,627
and that's why
you're acting this way.
376
00:19:58,628 --> 00:20:01,470
Andy, you couldn't be more wrong
377
00:20:01,471 --> 00:20:05,675
if you took the wrong train from
Wrongville and had a 3-wrong omelet...
378
00:20:06,406 --> 00:20:08,807
What's in this I.V.?
379
00:20:08,808 --> 00:20:12,341
Ah, methinks
me hit a nerve. Huh?
380
00:20:12,342 --> 00:20:13,482
You miss me.
381
00:20:13,483 --> 00:20:15,314
I don't miss you.
382
00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:18,447
I don't miss you.
Men don't miss men.
383
00:20:18,448 --> 00:20:19,989
That's just not the way
it works, Andy.
384
00:20:21,251 --> 00:20:22,651
I mean, you know,
385
00:20:22,652 --> 00:20:24,323
I like hanging out
with you, that's all.
386
00:20:24,324 --> 00:20:26,495
Hanging out,
watching the ballgame
387
00:20:26,496 --> 00:20:28,457
or grilling steaks or, you know,
388
00:20:28,458 --> 00:20:30,729
putting in surround sound
or going to the park.
389
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:33,332
Oh, The Great Escape is
on tomorrow afternoon.
390
00:20:33,333 --> 00:20:34,833
Actually, Yoki and I...
391
00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:38,467
Just forget it!
392
00:20:38,468 --> 00:20:43,272
No, Yoki and I were talking, and she
agreed that I should spend more time
393
00:20:43,273 --> 00:20:44,444
with my best friend.
394
00:20:46,015 --> 00:20:47,746
So...
395
00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:49,619
I can make the movie.
396
00:20:55,925 --> 00:20:57,026
Cool.
397
00:21:00,690 --> 00:21:01,761
Cool.
398
00:21:03,963 --> 00:21:05,864
Hey, check this out, man.
399
00:21:05,865 --> 00:21:07,766
This is the coolest bed
I've ever seen.
400
00:21:07,767 --> 00:21:08,837
Look at that.
401
00:21:08,838 --> 00:21:10,469
It's got electric buttons, man.
402
00:21:10,470 --> 00:21:11,840
Hot dog.
403
00:21:11,841 --> 00:21:13,342
Look at it. The front goes
down, the back goes down.
404
00:21:13,343 --> 00:21:14,543
Oh, scoot over, huh?
405
00:21:14,544 --> 00:21:15,674
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
406
00:21:15,675 --> 00:21:16,905
Here, check out
this button right here.
407
00:21:16,906 --> 00:21:19,047
Yeah, we should get
one of these for the office.
408
00:21:19,048 --> 00:21:21,480
Oh, hey, I saw some
wheelchairs outside.
409
00:21:21,481 --> 00:21:24,283
Jim! What would
Osama say?
410
00:21:26,386 --> 00:21:28,958
Get off! Get off the bed!
Get off the bed!
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