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1
00:00:03,474 --> 00:00:05,775
Oh, my God, this heat!
2
00:00:05,776 --> 00:00:08,208
When is Jim gonna be done
fixing the air conditioner?
3
00:00:08,209 --> 00:00:10,140
Oh, soon, I hope.
4
00:00:10,141 --> 00:00:12,012
Mommy, is this
what hell is like?
5
00:00:13,714 --> 00:00:15,746
No, honey, there's
no popsicles there.
6
00:00:17,548 --> 00:00:20,251
Oh, man, whew!
7
00:00:25,126 --> 00:00:27,657
All right.
8
00:00:27,658 --> 00:00:31,761
No worries. The AC is
fixed. We're in business.
9
00:00:31,762 --> 00:00:33,403
Oh!
GIRLS: Yay!
10
00:00:33,404 --> 00:00:35,035
Get ready to be cool.
11
00:00:36,467 --> 00:00:38,438
Here we go.
12
00:00:38,439 --> 00:00:40,039
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLES)
13
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,441
Oh, damn circuit breaker.
14
00:00:41,442 --> 00:00:44,644
Oh, no, Jim, fix it.
15
00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:46,146
God, somebody light a fire.
16
00:00:46,147 --> 00:00:48,648
Maybe the flames
will create a breeze.
17
00:00:48,649 --> 00:00:51,721
Come on. Can't we just get
a new air conditioning unit?
18
00:00:51,722 --> 00:00:54,084
Yes, why don't we?
And while we're at it,
19
00:00:54,085 --> 00:00:55,445
why don't we get
a brand new house?
20
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:58,728
Can we live by the lake?
21
00:00:58,729 --> 00:01:01,091
Yes, and we'll have a butler,
22
00:01:01,092 --> 00:01:03,633
and you'll ride dolphins
to school.
23
00:01:03,634 --> 00:01:06,166
BOTH: Yay!
24
00:01:06,167 --> 00:01:08,268
All right, you know what?
I'm starting to get worried.
25
00:01:08,269 --> 00:01:10,371
These girls should be
getting sarcasm by now.
26
00:01:11,502 --> 00:01:13,173
Okay, you guys, plan B.
27
00:01:13,174 --> 00:01:14,704
Let's all head over to my house.
28
00:01:14,705 --> 00:01:17,507
I got a brand new AC
unit, four zones. Oh.
29
00:01:17,508 --> 00:01:18,608
You could hang meat in there.
30
00:01:18,609 --> 00:01:20,351
Uh, plan C.
31
00:01:21,482 --> 00:01:24,255
I took parts out
of yours to fix mine.
32
00:01:26,417 --> 00:01:28,658
And they, uh, kind of melted.
33
00:01:28,659 --> 00:01:30,360
Oh!
34
00:01:30,361 --> 00:01:32,862
That's funny, you know,
they're not interchangeable.
35
00:01:32,863 --> 00:01:34,324
Well, no harm, no foul.
36
00:01:34,325 --> 00:01:37,468
No, no, no, Jim,
giant, stinky foul.
37
00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,431
I need my central air.
I'm a husky guy.
38
00:01:41,432 --> 00:01:43,303
I chafe.
39
00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:44,734
You guys are a bunch of wimps.
40
00:01:44,735 --> 00:01:47,507
In my day, air conditioning
was jumping on the family car,
41
00:01:47,508 --> 00:01:50,880
holding on to the luggage
rack, and ducking for bridges.
42
00:01:50,881 --> 00:01:52,512
Oh, that's right.
43
00:01:52,513 --> 00:01:54,414
I forgot about your summer
vacations with the Flintstones.
44
00:01:54,415 --> 00:01:56,216
Oh, come on.
45
00:01:56,217 --> 00:01:57,547
All right.
I can't take it anymore.
46
00:01:57,548 --> 00:01:59,118
I'm going back
to my neighborhood,
47
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,239
where at least the guys
dressed like that are in love.
48
00:02:01,522 --> 00:02:02,723
(DOOR OPENS)
49
00:02:03,554 --> 00:02:04,555
(DOOR CLOSES)
50
00:02:08,559 --> 00:02:09,829
You do look kind of gay.
51
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:12,202
Me? Look at you!
52
00:02:12,203 --> 00:02:14,265
Get out!
Get out of here!
53
00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:23,274
(INAUDIBLE)
54
00:02:25,676 --> 00:02:27,178
JIM: Oh, baby!
55
00:02:30,621 --> 00:02:31,622
(SNORTING)
56
00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:35,155
(SIGHING)
57
00:02:44,765 --> 00:02:46,297
(EXHALES)
58
00:02:48,239 --> 00:02:51,801
Oh, Jim, this is ridiculous.
59
00:02:51,802 --> 00:02:53,473
I haven't slept in three days.
60
00:02:53,474 --> 00:02:55,545
Come on, you got to take
us to a hotel or something.
61
00:02:55,546 --> 00:02:57,307
(JIM WHOOPING)
Jim?
62
00:02:57,308 --> 00:02:58,508
(WATER SPLASHING)
63
00:02:58,509 --> 00:02:59,880
(JIM EXCLAIMS)
64
00:03:01,382 --> 00:03:03,814
(GASPS) No, no, no, no, no, no!
65
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:06,887
JIM: Whoo-hoo!
66
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,522
Jim, what are you doing?
67
00:03:12,523 --> 00:03:14,424
I'm doing the backstroke.
68
00:03:14,425 --> 00:03:16,466
Want to see my butterfly?
69
00:03:16,467 --> 00:03:19,929
No. Get out of there.
That's not our pool.
70
00:03:19,930 --> 00:03:22,772
Come on, the Egans are
gone for at least a week.
71
00:03:22,773 --> 00:03:23,973
It's the least they can do.
72
00:03:23,974 --> 00:03:25,335
We're picking up their mail.
73
00:03:25,336 --> 00:03:27,707
We? I'm bringing in
their mail.
74
00:03:27,708 --> 00:03:29,279
The only thing you
ever did for them
75
00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:31,641
is hose off their house
after you threw an egg at it.
76
00:03:31,642 --> 00:03:33,743
I did not throw an egg
at their house.
77
00:03:33,744 --> 00:03:35,745
I threw it at the wind chimes
78
00:03:35,746 --> 00:03:39,389
'cause those gentle tones
were really pissing me off!
79
00:03:39,390 --> 00:03:41,220
Lois and Dutch asked me
to bring in their mail
80
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:44,223
because I have a reputation
as a very reliable person.
81
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:46,627
Yes, and I am
the neighborhood scamp.
82
00:03:47,498 --> 00:03:48,499
Care to join me?
83
00:03:49,460 --> 00:03:50,830
Come on.
84
00:03:50,831 --> 00:03:52,502
The Egans never said
we could use their pool.
85
00:03:52,503 --> 00:03:54,664
They never said we couldn't.
86
00:03:54,665 --> 00:03:56,766
Look, if they knew
how hot it was,
87
00:03:56,767 --> 00:04:00,270
they would've insisted
that we swim.
88
00:04:00,271 --> 00:04:01,841
You know what
a great guy Butch is.
89
00:04:01,842 --> 00:04:03,373
Dutch.
90
00:04:03,374 --> 00:04:04,974
Butch, Dutch.
91
00:04:04,975 --> 00:04:07,517
I don't know, those Irish
names all sound alike to me.
92
00:04:07,518 --> 00:04:08,549
(SIGHS)
93
00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,321
Care to join me?
94
00:04:11,322 --> 00:04:12,523
Jump in.
95
00:04:13,023 --> 00:04:15,386
(GASPS) Oh.
96
00:04:16,527 --> 00:04:19,258
Yeah. Refreshing, huh?
97
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,761
Oh. Your body will thank you,
98
00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:26,296
and then I'll thank you,
if you know what I'm saying.
99
00:04:26,297 --> 00:04:28,538
I always know
what you're saying.
100
00:04:28,539 --> 00:04:30,970
Come on, we're not
hurting anybody.
101
00:04:30,971 --> 00:04:33,603
I don't want anything to
do with this. This is wrong.
102
00:04:33,604 --> 00:04:35,445
That's what makes it so right.
103
00:04:35,446 --> 00:04:36,876
(GASPS)
104
00:04:36,877 --> 00:04:39,810
(EXCLAIMS)
That feels so cool.
105
00:04:41,912 --> 00:04:43,383
You know what else feels cool?
106
00:04:43,384 --> 00:04:45,054
Doing the right thing.
Oh.
107
00:04:45,055 --> 00:04:47,056
Which is why I'm going
home and going to bed,
108
00:04:47,057 --> 00:04:49,759
which is exactly
what you should do.
109
00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:51,521
JIM: Cheryl, telegram.
110
00:04:51,522 --> 00:04:53,463
Oh!
111
00:04:53,464 --> 00:04:55,396
Told you I'm
the neighborhood scamp.
112
00:05:03,604 --> 00:05:04,704
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)
113
00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:08,508
Who wants medium rare?
I got medium here.
114
00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:09,839
Hey, give me that, come on.
115
00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:12,012
Here, come on, take it.
That's it, oh!
116
00:05:12,943 --> 00:05:15,885
(JIM LAUGHING)
117
00:05:15,886 --> 00:05:17,016
Here you go, Joey.
(TURNS OFF MUSIC)
118
00:05:17,017 --> 00:05:18,988
Hey! What's
with the music?
119
00:05:18,989 --> 00:05:21,651
Hey, Cheryl, come
on in. We got shrimp.
120
00:05:21,652 --> 00:05:22,952
Hit me high, baby.
121
00:05:22,953 --> 00:05:25,324
This is fun.
122
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:27,698
I feel just like
a trainer at SeaWorld.
123
00:05:29,460 --> 00:05:30,731
Hmm, tail.
124
00:05:34,435 --> 00:05:35,665
What is going on here?
125
00:05:35,666 --> 00:05:37,807
What? What do you
mean? It's a pool party.
126
00:05:37,808 --> 00:05:39,739
Hey, get ready to jump
onto my shoulders.
127
00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:41,371
We're gonna have
chicken fights in 10 minutes.
128
00:05:41,372 --> 00:05:42,742
No!
129
00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:45,515
No, all these people
have got to get out.
130
00:05:45,516 --> 00:05:47,877
Cheryl, why would
you have a pool
131
00:05:47,878 --> 00:05:49,949
if you weren't going to
invite your friends?
132
00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:51,551
Because it's not your pool.
133
00:05:51,552 --> 00:05:53,383
Oh, please.
134
00:05:53,384 --> 00:05:55,354
Hey, Cheryl, do the
Egans get Vanity Fair?
135
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:57,126
I already read their InStyle.
136
00:05:57,127 --> 00:05:58,558
And credit card statement.
137
00:05:58,559 --> 00:06:00,391
Boy, can they
suck down the hooch.
138
00:06:01,432 --> 00:06:03,463
This is totally out of control.
139
00:06:03,464 --> 00:06:04,994
What? Where are you
getting that from?
140
00:06:04,995 --> 00:06:06,536
Hey, hey, who ordered a keg?
141
00:06:06,537 --> 00:06:09,469
Right here. Uh,
yeah, that's the keg.
142
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:12,402
Put it over by the
ping-pong table. Thanks.
143
00:06:12,403 --> 00:06:14,674
Hey, you'll have a
draft. You'll love it.
144
00:06:14,675 --> 00:06:15,845
Here's your soda.
145
00:06:15,846 --> 00:06:17,607
Wait, where'd you get those?
146
00:06:17,608 --> 00:06:20,580
In the house. We crawled
through the doggy door.
147
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:24,654
All right, everybody,
listen up! This stops now!
148
00:06:24,655 --> 00:06:25,816
(SILENCE)
149
00:06:28,559 --> 00:06:30,760
(CHATTERING RESUMES)
150
00:06:30,761 --> 00:06:33,162
You are too much!
151
00:06:33,163 --> 00:06:35,665
Cheryl, you got
to loosen up, man.
152
00:06:35,666 --> 00:06:37,026
Really, don't worry about it.
153
00:06:37,027 --> 00:06:39,969
We'll clean up and
replace everything we use.
154
00:06:39,970 --> 00:06:41,931
Hey, Cheryl, could
you do my back?
155
00:06:41,932 --> 00:06:44,103
Jim, that's not even the point.
156
00:06:44,104 --> 00:06:46,105
I mean, what are you
teaching the girls?
157
00:06:46,106 --> 00:06:48,438
How are they gonna learn
respect for other people's property?
158
00:06:48,439 --> 00:06:50,580
Oh, will you get out?
159
00:06:50,581 --> 00:06:53,443
Cheryl, the girls aren't
gonna remember this.
160
00:06:53,444 --> 00:06:55,445
They're kids, they're stupid.
161
00:06:55,446 --> 00:06:57,787
They don't even know
what I do for a living.
162
00:06:57,788 --> 00:06:59,849
Yeah, come on,
let them have fun.
163
00:06:59,850 --> 00:07:01,120
Let us have fun.
164
00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:02,892
Either come in
and swim or go home.
165
00:07:02,893 --> 00:07:03,953
Yeah.
166
00:07:03,954 --> 00:07:05,154
BOTH: Cannonball!
167
00:07:05,155 --> 00:07:06,556
(SCREAMING)
168
00:07:06,557 --> 00:07:08,058
(ALL LAUGHING)
169
00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:11,861
Oh, come on,
Commissioner Fun Kill,
170
00:07:11,862 --> 00:07:13,803
lighten up.
Have some fun.
171
00:07:13,804 --> 00:07:16,967
Put the badge in the
drawer for the day, will you?
172
00:07:19,870 --> 00:07:22,011
Look at me.
I'm a movie star.
173
00:07:22,012 --> 00:07:23,614
And I'm her sister, Ruby.
174
00:07:24,745 --> 00:07:27,116
Wait, that's Lois Egan's
mink stole.
175
00:07:27,117 --> 00:07:29,849
I didn't tell them
they could do that.
176
00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:31,482
You didn't tell us we couldn't.
177
00:07:34,084 --> 00:07:35,956
And they're not influenced
by any of this, huh?
178
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:39,158
(SIGHS) All right.
179
00:07:39,159 --> 00:07:41,190
I get it.
Girls, go on.
180
00:07:41,191 --> 00:07:42,932
Go back in the house.
Put it back.
181
00:07:42,933 --> 00:07:44,163
Put it back, come on.
Hurry up.
182
00:07:44,164 --> 00:07:45,935
Thank you.
183
00:07:45,936 --> 00:07:48,167
All right, everybody,
out of the pool.
184
00:07:48,168 --> 00:07:50,500
Let's go. Let's go,
everybody out.
185
00:07:50,501 --> 00:07:51,601
(ALL MURMURING
IN DISAPPOINTMENT)
186
00:07:51,602 --> 00:07:53,643
Hey, how about one chicken fight
187
00:07:53,644 --> 00:07:55,806
while they're in
the house? No! No!
188
00:08:03,714 --> 00:08:08,658
Oh, damn, 95 degrees
at 7:30 in the morning.
189
00:08:08,659 --> 00:08:10,189
Oh!
190
00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:12,491
Who wants a hug?
191
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:13,723
Ew!
192
00:08:13,724 --> 00:08:14,894
(GROANS)
193
00:08:14,895 --> 00:08:17,727
You.
Back off.
194
00:08:17,728 --> 00:08:20,670
You know, as soon
as the kids go to school,
195
00:08:20,671 --> 00:08:22,501
we can sneak off
to the Egans' pool.
196
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:24,734
Nobody is going in
that pool. Forget it.
197
00:08:24,735 --> 00:08:26,876
Cheryl, that's the whole
reason I came over here.
198
00:08:26,877 --> 00:08:28,137
Well, I'm sorry.
199
00:08:28,138 --> 00:08:30,240
(GASPS) Ooh, oh, oh.
200
00:08:31,842 --> 00:08:33,143
Ah!
201
00:08:33,984 --> 00:08:35,285
Refreshing.
202
00:08:38,248 --> 00:08:40,290
And the cold cuts the funk.
203
00:08:41,121 --> 00:08:42,722
Oh, that's disgusting.
204
00:08:42,723 --> 00:08:45,825
Yeah, that's my shirt.
205
00:08:45,826 --> 00:08:48,028
Please, it never
looked this good on you.
206
00:08:50,130 --> 00:08:53,532
You don't have a tenth
of the bod I have.
207
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,866
I have exactly a tenth
of the bod you have.
208
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:59,909
All right, all right.
209
00:08:59,910 --> 00:09:02,942
On that note, I'm going over
to water the Egans' plants.
210
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,944
I hope you guys cleaned
up after your party.
211
00:09:04,945 --> 00:09:06,716
They'll never know
we were there.
212
00:09:06,717 --> 00:09:10,750
Oh, yeah, the pool house
toilet just backed itself up.
213
00:09:10,751 --> 00:09:14,223
All right, I found the part
for the air conditioner.
214
00:09:14,224 --> 00:09:15,985
Hey!
(WOMEN EXCLAIMING)
215
00:09:15,986 --> 00:09:17,556
They put it on a boat
from Thailand.
216
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:18,928
It'll be here
in less than a month.
217
00:09:18,929 --> 00:09:20,630
ALL: No!
218
00:09:20,631 --> 00:09:24,563
Oh, gee, if only there
was some alternate way
219
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,195
that we could cool off.
220
00:09:26,196 --> 00:09:30,069
Wouldn't it be great if the
answer was as close as next door?
221
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:32,241
Do you mean a rectangular answer
222
00:09:32,242 --> 00:09:34,804
filled with shimmering
liquid relief?
223
00:09:34,805 --> 00:09:36,575
Yeah.
224
00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:39,248
No, no, no, no, don't
even think about it.
225
00:09:39,249 --> 00:09:40,650
I don't care how hot it gets,
226
00:09:40,651 --> 00:09:41,981
nobody is going in that pool.
227
00:09:41,982 --> 00:09:43,883
Oh.
Oh.
228
00:09:43,884 --> 00:09:46,786
Well, I'm sorry, but somebody
has to be the grown-up around here.
229
00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:48,818
Hey, Cheryl, is it
any cooler up there?
230
00:09:48,819 --> 00:09:50,089
Where?
On your high horse.
231
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:52,591
(LAUGHING) Very good.
232
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:55,164
Girls, did Daddy talk
to you about yesterday?
233
00:09:55,165 --> 00:09:57,997
Of course I did.
I'm a grown-up, too.
234
00:09:57,998 --> 00:10:00,229
Go ahead, tell Mommy
what I taught you. Go on.
235
00:10:00,230 --> 00:10:01,731
We always have
to have permission
236
00:10:01,732 --> 00:10:03,673
to use other people's
stuff. That's right.
237
00:10:03,674 --> 00:10:05,034
Even if it's really, really hot,
238
00:10:05,035 --> 00:10:06,877
and they would never,
ever find out.
239
00:10:08,038 --> 00:10:10,680
Pretty grown-up, huh?
Proud of you girls.
240
00:10:10,681 --> 00:10:12,712
Okay, here, go turn
on Daddy's truck
241
00:10:12,713 --> 00:10:15,214
and get
the air conditioner going.
242
00:10:15,215 --> 00:10:17,647
Well, looks like it's
time for the Andyman
243
00:10:17,648 --> 00:10:19,289
to get a short-cicle.
244
00:10:22,322 --> 00:10:24,795
Oh, okay, no, no, no.
245
00:10:34,164 --> 00:10:35,735
(IMITATING ANDY) "Yeah,
sure we cleaned everything up.
246
00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:37,636
"They'll never know
we were here."
247
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:38,839
Jackass.
248
00:11:32,222 --> 00:11:34,424
Oh, yeah, Mama like!
249
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,371
JIM: All right,
girls, come on.
250
00:11:42,372 --> 00:11:45,104
We're gonna go to an air
conditioned movie theater
251
00:11:45,105 --> 00:11:49,208
because someone wouldn't
let us use the P-O-O-L.
252
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,841
Daddy, we know
that spells "pool."
253
00:11:51,842 --> 00:11:55,344
And you are the smartest
girl in the whole world.
254
00:11:55,345 --> 00:11:57,387
Ooh, that's sarcasm, right?
255
00:12:01,151 --> 00:12:04,253
Very good.
I like these girls.
256
00:12:04,254 --> 00:12:05,394
You sure you don't
want to join us?
257
00:12:05,395 --> 00:12:06,796
No, no, honey, I'd love to,
258
00:12:06,797 --> 00:12:08,057
but I've got so much work to do.
259
00:12:08,058 --> 00:12:10,059
So, you guys have fun.
All right.
260
00:12:10,060 --> 00:12:11,931
Sweat it off. I'll be
here, you know, working.
261
00:12:11,932 --> 00:12:13,103
(LAUGHS)
262
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:17,838
(SCATTING)
263
00:12:26,877 --> 00:12:27,948
Where you going?
264
00:12:28,819 --> 00:12:31,250
Oh, um...
265
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:34,223
(STUTTERING) I was just gonna
put this swim stuff in the garage
266
00:12:34,224 --> 00:12:36,887
'cause you know Jim.
No willpower.
267
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:39,990
Garage is that way.
268
00:12:41,391 --> 00:12:42,762
I know.
269
00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:47,137
You need a sun hat
to put swim stuff away?
270
00:12:48,138 --> 00:12:49,238
Well...
271
00:12:49,239 --> 00:12:51,100
And a swimsuit?
272
00:12:51,101 --> 00:12:52,402
And a wax?
273
00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:56,405
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
274
00:12:56,406 --> 00:12:58,007
Is that sunscreen?
275
00:12:58,008 --> 00:12:59,208
Oh, um...
276
00:12:59,209 --> 00:13:01,550
Wait a minute.
277
00:13:01,551 --> 00:13:04,453
You are going over to
swim at the Egans' pool.
278
00:13:04,454 --> 00:13:05,485
Oh!
(STUTTERS)
279
00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:09,890
(SIGHS) Screw it.
It's too hot to lie.
280
00:13:11,091 --> 00:13:12,962
Yes, I'm going swimming
because I'm the oldest,
281
00:13:12,963 --> 00:13:14,964
and I can do whatever
I want. Happy?
282
00:13:14,965 --> 00:13:18,327
No, Cheryl, no, I'm not happy.
283
00:13:18,328 --> 00:13:19,568
Not happy about the example
284
00:13:19,569 --> 00:13:22,471
you're setting for
our nieces and nephew.
285
00:13:22,472 --> 00:13:24,304
They deserve better.
286
00:13:26,176 --> 00:13:30,009
All right, well, you can stand
there in sweaty judgment of me,
287
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:32,481
or we can all go swimming.
288
00:13:32,482 --> 00:13:33,582
Great!
289
00:13:33,583 --> 00:13:36,115
We're wearing
our swimsuits already.
290
00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:37,586
And we waxed.
Yeah.
291
00:13:37,587 --> 00:13:40,819
Oh. But not a word
to Jim.
292
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,591
Hey, you don't bring up the wax,
293
00:13:42,592 --> 00:13:43,894
we won't bring up the swim.
294
00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:52,431
Oh. Oh!
295
00:13:52,432 --> 00:13:56,936
Andy, you're late again. That's
three days in a row. Where you been?
296
00:13:56,937 --> 00:13:58,267
Oh, here and there.
297
00:13:58,268 --> 00:13:59,508
What you been doing?
298
00:13:59,509 --> 00:14:01,440
Oh, this and that.
299
00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:03,072
(SNIFFING)
300
00:14:03,073 --> 00:14:05,074
What's that funny smell?
301
00:14:05,075 --> 00:14:07,216
Jim, it's 100 degrees outside.
302
00:14:07,217 --> 00:14:09,950
And my funny smells
are just beginning.
303
00:14:11,521 --> 00:14:12,622
What's with your eyes?
304
00:14:13,283 --> 00:14:14,954
Uh, nothing.
305
00:14:14,955 --> 00:14:16,385
Baby blue, just...
Just like always.
306
00:14:16,386 --> 00:14:18,287
No, no, no.
307
00:14:18,288 --> 00:14:19,929
No, no, no,
they're all bloodshot.
308
00:14:19,930 --> 00:14:22,091
You've been late for three
days. What's going on here?
309
00:14:22,092 --> 00:14:26,235
All right, Jim, you were
gonna find out sooner or later.
310
00:14:26,236 --> 00:14:28,338
I've been drinking my breakfast.
311
00:14:29,439 --> 00:14:32,272
No, that doesn't smell
like alcohol.
312
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:34,103
Smells like...
313
00:14:34,104 --> 00:14:36,106
(SNIFFING) Chlorine.
314
00:14:37,477 --> 00:14:40,279
Yeah, yeah,
it's pretty bad, Jim.
315
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:44,914
Uh, I... I've been
drinking chlorine.
316
00:14:44,915 --> 00:14:47,656
Friend of mine, he
turned me on to it.
317
00:14:47,657 --> 00:14:50,190
You know, you
can't stop once you...
318
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:51,591
Andy.
319
00:14:52,993 --> 00:14:55,665
Fine, I've been swimming
down at the Egans' pool.
320
00:14:59,269 --> 00:15:01,430
Alone?
321
00:15:01,431 --> 00:15:04,003
No, no, but it...
It's not my fault, Jim.
322
00:15:04,004 --> 00:15:06,135
Somebody made me do it.
323
00:15:06,136 --> 00:15:08,277
She threatened me not to tell.
324
00:15:08,278 --> 00:15:10,680
It's one of my sisters, and
you're sleeping with her.
325
00:15:13,083 --> 00:15:14,144
Cheryl?
326
00:15:15,545 --> 00:15:16,686
Why was that a question?
327
00:15:29,499 --> 00:15:31,230
JIM: Honey, I'm home.
328
00:15:31,231 --> 00:15:32,432
(GASPING)
329
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:41,341
Hey.
Hey.
330
00:15:42,712 --> 00:15:44,013
Well, what are you doing here?
331
00:15:44,014 --> 00:15:45,174
You're supposed to be at work.
332
00:15:45,175 --> 00:15:48,047
I know, I just kind of
wanted to hang out at home
333
00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:49,548
and be with you.
Oh!
334
00:15:49,549 --> 00:15:53,222
Just you and me
together all day.
335
00:15:53,223 --> 00:15:54,985
All day?
Mmm-hmm.
336
00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:58,387
Well, won't that be fun?
337
00:15:58,388 --> 00:15:59,629
Uh-huh.
338
00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:01,961
Wait!
339
00:16:03,033 --> 00:16:04,434
That's not man's work.
340
00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:12,641
You know what would
make this day extra special?
341
00:16:12,642 --> 00:16:14,273
Hmm?
342
00:16:14,274 --> 00:16:16,045
If you went and picked
up lunch at Stevie B's.
343
00:16:16,046 --> 00:16:17,606
Stevie B's ribs?
344
00:16:17,607 --> 00:16:19,549
Oh, you know how I
like all-meat meals.
345
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,281
All right.
But you know what?
346
00:16:22,282 --> 00:16:24,683
Stevie B's is
all the way across town.
347
00:16:24,684 --> 00:16:26,015
It's gonna take me
at least an hour
348
00:16:26,016 --> 00:16:27,186
to go there and come back.
349
00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:28,618
I'm good with that.
350
00:16:29,619 --> 00:16:31,060
Oh, well...
351
00:16:31,061 --> 00:16:33,422
I mean...
I mean, honey,
352
00:16:33,423 --> 00:16:37,096
every second away
from you is an eternity.
353
00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:39,698
But a special lunch like that
354
00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:43,502
would certainly deserve
a special dessert,
355
00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,235
if you know what I'm saying.
356
00:16:46,236 --> 00:16:48,508
I always know
what you're saying.
357
00:16:50,180 --> 00:16:51,481
Sex, right?
358
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:54,483
Okay.
359
00:16:54,484 --> 00:16:56,316
Yes!
To Stevie B's!
360
00:17:03,593 --> 00:17:04,794
(GASPING)
361
00:17:07,357 --> 00:17:09,328
Cheryl?
Oh!
362
00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:11,060
Oh, I'm sorry, honey,
I didn't mean to scare you.
363
00:17:11,061 --> 00:17:12,131
No, no.
364
00:17:12,132 --> 00:17:14,103
I... I just forgot
to ask you,
365
00:17:14,104 --> 00:17:16,205
do you want spicy or mild
barbecue sauce on your ribs?
366
00:17:16,206 --> 00:17:19,339
Oh, I don't care. You
know, whatever takes longer.
367
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,112
I got you.
368
00:17:23,343 --> 00:17:25,144
Oh, what are you looking for?
369
00:17:25,145 --> 00:17:26,375
Oh, nothing.
370
00:17:26,376 --> 00:17:28,117
Nothing, huh?
Are you sure?
371
00:17:28,118 --> 00:17:29,648
Mmm-hmm.
Hmm.
372
00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:31,481
You think it could be this?
373
00:17:35,155 --> 00:17:36,186
No.
374
00:17:41,531 --> 00:17:43,533
Jim, Jim, it's not funny.
375
00:17:46,636 --> 00:17:48,337
It's funny to me.
376
00:17:48,338 --> 00:17:50,600
But, of course, I'm
not the grown-up here.
377
00:17:54,544 --> 00:17:55,774
Are you through?
378
00:17:55,775 --> 00:17:58,477
Everything except
for my evil laugh.
379
00:17:58,478 --> 00:18:00,550
(LAUGHS EVILLY)
380
00:18:01,511 --> 00:18:03,613
Jim, you're burning daylight!
381
00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:06,385
The Egans are gonna be
home tonight.
382
00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:09,087
Come on, I just
need one more swim.
383
00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:10,259
One more swim?
Just one more.
384
00:18:10,260 --> 00:18:11,660
Just one more swim?
385
00:18:11,661 --> 00:18:14,123
And then what? Another
pool and then another?
386
00:18:14,124 --> 00:18:16,365
When's it gonna end, Cheryl?
387
00:18:16,366 --> 00:18:19,599
Tell me. Admit it,
you're out of control.
388
00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:26,206
Oh, my God, Jim, you're right.
389
00:18:27,237 --> 00:18:28,608
You're right.
390
00:18:29,639 --> 00:18:30,780
I don't deserve you.
391
00:18:32,142 --> 00:18:33,442
(SNIFFLES)
392
00:18:33,443 --> 00:18:34,743
Would you hold me?
393
00:18:34,744 --> 00:18:36,485
Come here, baby.
394
00:18:36,486 --> 00:18:38,148
(CRYING) Ha!
395
00:18:42,452 --> 00:18:43,752
I'm going over there,
396
00:18:43,753 --> 00:18:45,524
and there's nothing
you can do to stop me!
397
00:18:45,525 --> 00:18:46,895
All right.
398
00:18:46,896 --> 00:18:48,227
I mean it!
399
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:49,698
Fine, go ahead.
Have fun.
400
00:18:49,699 --> 00:18:51,601
I will!
Go on.
401
00:18:56,306 --> 00:18:57,467
Oh, man.
402
00:18:58,308 --> 00:19:00,369
(SIGHS)
403
00:19:00,370 --> 00:19:02,341
If you're okay with this,
it must be really bad.
404
00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:03,513
(LAUGHS)
405
00:19:05,345 --> 00:19:07,516
Jim, what am I doing?
406
00:19:07,517 --> 00:19:09,178
I... I can't stop going
to that pool.
407
00:19:09,179 --> 00:19:10,319
I am out of control.
408
00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:12,321
Oh, come on, Cheryl.
Jim...
409
00:19:12,322 --> 00:19:13,722
I murdered a floaty froggy
410
00:19:13,723 --> 00:19:16,755
and hid the body
in the dishwasher.
411
00:19:16,756 --> 00:19:19,728
You are out of control,
and you want to know why?
412
00:19:19,729 --> 00:19:21,930
'Cause I'm awful?
Yes.
413
00:19:21,931 --> 00:19:24,733
You are awful at being bad.
414
00:19:24,734 --> 00:19:26,595
You're too perfect.
415
00:19:26,596 --> 00:19:29,668
Look, you've got to be a
little bad once in a while.
416
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:31,470
Look what it did for me.
I mean, look at me.
417
00:19:31,471 --> 00:19:33,071
Look how much younger
I look than my age.
418
00:19:35,305 --> 00:19:37,776
Jim, we can't
just tell the kids,
419
00:19:37,777 --> 00:19:40,178
"It's okay to be a little
bad once in a while."
420
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:41,710
Of course not.
Right.
421
00:19:41,711 --> 00:19:42,831
We don't tell them anything.
422
00:19:43,753 --> 00:19:46,385
That's the great thing
about being parents.
423
00:19:46,386 --> 00:19:47,486
You can do whatever you want
424
00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:49,459
as long as you got
a good cover story.
425
00:19:50,890 --> 00:19:52,661
That's not in any
of the books I read.
426
00:19:52,662 --> 00:19:56,765
Of course not. You
read those parent books.
427
00:19:56,766 --> 00:19:59,299
Did you take the day off
just to bust me?
428
00:20:00,570 --> 00:20:01,970
I took the day off
429
00:20:01,971 --> 00:20:05,275
so I could go swimming
with my bad, bad wife.
430
00:20:08,308 --> 00:20:10,579
I am gonna go get my trunks.
431
00:20:10,580 --> 00:20:12,341
Oh, no, you don't.
432
00:20:12,342 --> 00:20:13,613
Bad boys don't wear trunks...
433
00:20:16,916 --> 00:20:19,618
If you know what I'm saying.
434
00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:21,251
Of course I do.
435
00:20:21,991 --> 00:20:23,293
Naked, right?
436
00:20:24,854 --> 00:20:26,256
Yes, Jim.
Oh, yeah!
437
00:20:31,531 --> 00:20:33,462
(GROWLS)
(LAUGHS)
438
00:20:33,463 --> 00:20:36,965
I'm a love shark,
and I see a sexy surfer.
439
00:20:36,966 --> 00:20:38,567
I hope he doesn't get me.
440
00:20:38,568 --> 00:20:40,569
Oh, I'll get you.
441
00:20:40,570 --> 00:20:42,442
Come here, come here.
442
00:20:47,817 --> 00:20:49,279
I got you.
443
00:20:54,424 --> 00:20:55,485
Lois.
444
00:20:56,586 --> 00:20:57,786
Butch.
445
00:20:57,787 --> 00:20:58,958
Dutch.
Dutch.
446
00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:04,764
So, how was the trip?
28666
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