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1
00:00:02,403 --> 00:00:03,533
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.
2
00:00:03,534 --> 00:00:05,105
Where do you think you're going?
3
00:00:05,106 --> 00:00:06,506
To the bathroom.
4
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,139
No, no, no, no.
5
00:00:09,140 --> 00:00:10,241
Uh-uh.
6
00:00:11,082 --> 00:00:12,583
I don't think so.
7
00:00:14,345 --> 00:00:16,687
You live across the street
now. Go use your own.
8
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:21,051
(LAUGHS)
What's the big deal?
9
00:00:21,052 --> 00:00:22,352
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
10
00:00:22,353 --> 00:00:24,194
I'll tell you the big deal.
11
00:00:24,195 --> 00:00:25,755
I'm having a few beers.
12
00:00:25,756 --> 00:00:27,428
I want to keep it open for me.
13
00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:30,801
Okay, you go first.
14
00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:33,504
I don't have to go now.
15
00:00:34,605 --> 00:00:35,805
So, then I'll go.
16
00:00:35,806 --> 00:00:37,438
No, no, no, no!
17
00:00:38,069 --> 00:00:39,739
No!
18
00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:43,614
Because if you go in there and I think
about you, then I'm gonna have to go.
19
00:00:46,717 --> 00:00:48,579
You think about me
when I'm in there?
20
00:00:50,121 --> 00:00:52,622
Just go. Just go
to your own house.
21
00:00:52,623 --> 00:00:54,354
Try not to think
about me when I'm gone.
22
00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:56,357
Just get out of here!
23
00:01:02,663 --> 00:01:04,064
Damn! I gotta go now!
24
00:01:14,205 --> 00:01:15,746
JIM: Oh, baby!
25
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:21,381
Cheryl, get in here!
I want you to see something!
26
00:01:21,382 --> 00:01:23,753
CHERYL: Oh, for God's sake,
would you just flush it?
27
00:01:23,754 --> 00:01:26,217
Not that! Come
here. Look at this.
28
00:01:31,162 --> 00:01:32,292
(GASPS)
29
00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:35,495
Oh, no.
Gracie strikes again.
30
00:01:35,496 --> 00:01:37,767
Yeah.
What's going on?
31
00:01:37,768 --> 00:01:40,170
Oh, creepy.
32
00:01:40,171 --> 00:01:42,302
You know what?
That is my nail polish.
33
00:01:42,303 --> 00:01:44,704
God, Gracie must have
taken it out of my purse.
34
00:01:44,705 --> 00:01:47,437
Yo! What the hell
is this?
35
00:01:47,438 --> 00:01:49,108
I have to use the
bushes, but you three
36
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:50,640
are having some sort
of convention in here.
37
00:01:50,641 --> 00:01:52,812
Oh, come on, Andy,
get out of here.
38
00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:55,285
CHERYL: Oh! I don't know
what to do about Gracie.
39
00:01:55,286 --> 00:01:58,518
She's not listening, she's talking
back, and now she's bagging.
40
00:01:58,519 --> 00:01:59,750
Tagging.
Oh, right.
41
00:02:01,852 --> 00:02:03,493
You know what?
42
00:02:03,494 --> 00:02:05,825
I say we come down
on her like an 18-wheeler
43
00:02:05,826 --> 00:02:08,528
on a sleepy deer.
44
00:02:08,529 --> 00:02:10,800
Right. Right.
It's time to get tough.
45
00:02:10,801 --> 00:02:13,334
Tonight, when I tuck
her in, no song.
46
00:02:14,905 --> 00:02:16,266
All right,
47
00:02:16,267 --> 00:02:18,138
but if child services
call, you talk to them.
48
00:02:18,509 --> 00:02:20,240
Oh.
49
00:02:20,241 --> 00:02:21,541
Cheryl, you know what?
50
00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:23,913
We've tried your
touchy-feely, sensitive crap.
51
00:02:23,914 --> 00:02:26,376
Well, but, Jim,
all the books say...
52
00:02:26,377 --> 00:02:28,479
Cheryl, books are for idiots!
53
00:02:30,221 --> 00:02:32,151
Your way is not working!
54
00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:34,184
Well, it works on Ruby.
55
00:02:34,185 --> 00:02:35,825
Well, she's the good kid.
56
00:02:35,826 --> 00:02:38,157
Yeah. She really is.
57
00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:39,659
You know, one time
she apologized to me
58
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,831
for it being cloudy.
59
00:02:41,832 --> 00:02:44,163
It's Gracie.
You know, she's like me.
60
00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:46,567
She's different.
There's a darkness there.
61
00:02:47,898 --> 00:02:49,499
Can I be honest?
62
00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,660
If she weren't your kid, I
wouldn't speak to her. What?
63
00:02:55,206 --> 00:02:57,607
I say we take the gloves off.
64
00:02:57,608 --> 00:03:00,210
She's not gonna get
that Game Boy she wanted.
65
00:03:00,211 --> 00:03:04,314
We make her clean the
boogers off the mirror by herself.
66
00:03:04,315 --> 00:03:06,616
And just to stick the knife
in and twist it a little bit more,
67
00:03:06,617 --> 00:03:08,458
while she's cleaning it off,
68
00:03:08,459 --> 00:03:09,739
I'll eat cookies
in front of her.
69
00:03:10,861 --> 00:03:12,322
No, Jim.
70
00:03:12,323 --> 00:03:14,324
We'll eat cookies
in front of her.
71
00:03:14,325 --> 00:03:15,396
Yes.
72
00:03:17,268 --> 00:03:18,628
What do you think, Cheryl?
73
00:03:18,629 --> 00:03:20,199
All right, all right.
We'll try it your way.
74
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,671
We got to nip
this thing in the bud.
75
00:03:21,672 --> 00:03:23,473
You know, I want to be
PTA President one day,
76
00:03:23,474 --> 00:03:25,314
and this is just the
kind of stuff they dig up.
77
00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:28,508
All right, you get
the nail polish remover,
78
00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:29,839
and I'll get the cookies.
79
00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:31,242
Ah, we're out of both.
80
00:03:34,615 --> 00:03:37,588
Seriously, what do
you do all day?
81
00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:49,729
Ooh, can we drive
through the car wash?
82
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,230
No, no, young lady.
83
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:52,902
No fun for you today.
84
00:03:52,903 --> 00:03:55,805
You are still in booger trouble.
85
00:03:55,806 --> 00:03:57,607
Daddy, I said I
wouldn't do it again.
86
00:03:57,608 --> 00:03:59,469
Yeah, well, that's what
you said the last time,
87
00:03:59,470 --> 00:04:01,471
and there's
a new sheriff in town.
88
00:04:01,472 --> 00:04:04,013
Ooh! Does he have
a horse? I like horses.
89
00:04:04,014 --> 00:04:05,416
Horses and dolphins.
90
00:04:08,479 --> 00:04:09,819
Can I go see the magazines?
91
00:04:09,820 --> 00:04:11,321
Yes, yes, yes.
92
00:04:11,322 --> 00:04:12,522
But don't look at the pictures.
93
00:04:12,523 --> 00:04:14,285
It'll give you
an eating disorder.
94
00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:18,959
All right, nail polish,
nail polish. Let's see.
95
00:04:19,790 --> 00:04:22,292
Nail polish remover.
96
00:04:22,293 --> 00:04:23,863
What's with all
the different colors?
97
00:04:23,864 --> 00:04:25,835
I'm guessing orange
takes off orange,
98
00:04:25,836 --> 00:04:27,937
purple takes off purple.
99
00:04:27,938 --> 00:04:31,441
Add it to the list of things
I don't get about women.
100
00:04:31,442 --> 00:04:34,904
This, vegetarian sandwiches,
and crying when they're happy.
101
00:04:34,905 --> 00:04:36,676
(LAUGHING) Yeah!
102
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,348
All right.
Oh, my God.
103
00:04:38,349 --> 00:04:39,579
Do you see what I see?
104
00:04:39,580 --> 00:04:42,281
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hold it right there!
105
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,684
Honey, you put that back
right now! Put it back!
106
00:04:44,685 --> 00:04:47,317
No, it's mine.
The lady gave it to me.
107
00:04:47,318 --> 00:04:48,958
What lady gave it to you?
108
00:04:48,959 --> 00:04:50,491
The pink balloon lady.
109
00:04:52,423 --> 00:04:54,324
The pink balloon lady?
110
00:04:54,325 --> 00:04:55,465
Yeah, let me guess, sweetie.
111
00:04:55,466 --> 00:04:57,397
She bounces around from
pharmacy to pharmacy
112
00:04:57,398 --> 00:04:58,698
handing out Crunchy Chunks.
113
00:04:58,699 --> 00:04:59,899
Daddy!
114
00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:01,831
No, no, not another word,
young lady.
115
00:05:01,832 --> 00:05:03,703
You are in real trouble now.
116
00:05:03,704 --> 00:05:05,664
Now give me that. Come
on. Spit it out in my hand.
117
00:05:14,014 --> 00:05:15,015
All right, come on.
118
00:05:16,417 --> 00:05:17,487
You see, Andy?
119
00:05:17,488 --> 00:05:19,749
This is how a man
raises children.
120
00:05:19,750 --> 00:05:22,051
Strong, firm, and unwavering.
121
00:05:22,052 --> 00:05:24,454
What do you do with
the gunk in your hand?
122
00:05:24,455 --> 00:05:26,757
I don't know. Cheryl
usually has a wipe.
123
00:05:42,012 --> 00:05:45,515
Ah, those vegetarian
sandwiches are so good!
124
00:05:45,516 --> 00:05:46,577
Mmm!
125
00:05:47,918 --> 00:05:49,920
I know. I'm so
happy I could cry.
126
00:05:52,623 --> 00:05:53,824
(GROWLING)
127
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:56,727
Daddy's mean!
128
00:05:57,928 --> 00:05:59,789
That's right, I am!
129
00:05:59,790 --> 00:06:00,931
What's going on?
130
00:06:02,132 --> 00:06:03,694
I caught your daughter stealing.
131
00:06:04,635 --> 00:06:05,895
Oh, no.
132
00:06:05,896 --> 00:06:08,037
Don't worry about it.
I took care of it.
133
00:06:08,038 --> 00:06:09,640
She's grounded for a month!
134
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:11,441
What did she steal?
135
00:06:11,442 --> 00:06:13,002
Candy.
From the pharmacy.
136
00:06:13,003 --> 00:06:14,704
(SIGHS)
Yeah, and get this.
137
00:06:14,705 --> 00:06:16,706
She tells me that
yesterday some woman
138
00:06:16,707 --> 00:06:18,509
with a pink balloon
gave it to her.
139
00:06:19,610 --> 00:06:20,680
The pink balloon lady?
140
00:06:20,681 --> 00:06:22,452
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
141
00:06:22,453 --> 00:06:23,613
Come on.
142
00:06:23,614 --> 00:06:25,385
How dumb does she think I am?
143
00:06:27,918 --> 00:06:29,388
Dumb enough not to know
144
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:30,790
that your kids
get their hair cut
145
00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:32,623
at a place called
the Pink Balloon.
146
00:06:36,967 --> 00:06:40,771
Where they went yesterday and
where they give out free candy.
147
00:06:44,575 --> 00:06:45,836
Crunchy Chunks?
148
00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:51,141
Crap!
149
00:06:53,113 --> 00:06:56,517
What kind of kid doesn't eat a
candy bar as soon as they get it?
150
00:06:58,849 --> 00:07:01,150
All right.
151
00:07:01,151 --> 00:07:03,494
Well, I guess we really
screwed up this time.
152
00:07:04,525 --> 00:07:06,956
We? We didn't
do anything.
153
00:07:06,957 --> 00:07:09,629
All right, let's not beat
ourselves up. You're right.
154
00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:11,060
The grounding will
just be a punishment
155
00:07:11,061 --> 00:07:13,533
for all the things that
she's gotten away with.
156
00:07:13,534 --> 00:07:16,866
Like, uh, like breaking
the lamp on the end table.
157
00:07:16,867 --> 00:07:21,210
No, that was you proving you
can still jump over the couch.
158
00:07:21,211 --> 00:07:23,212
All right, well, how about
the gum in the shower head?
159
00:07:23,213 --> 00:07:26,517
Mmm-mmm. Still you, trying
to create massage action.
160
00:07:29,079 --> 00:07:32,151
What, am I on trial here?
I didn't steal any candy.
161
00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:33,723
Neither did Gracie,
162
00:07:33,724 --> 00:07:36,487
and when she tried to tell you
the truth, you didn't believe her.
163
00:07:38,088 --> 00:07:39,759
You're right.
164
00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:41,991
All right.
I'll talk to her.
165
00:07:41,992 --> 00:07:43,462
Good.
166
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:45,094
But you're coming with me.
It was your idea.
167
00:07:45,095 --> 00:07:46,896
What was my idea?
168
00:07:46,897 --> 00:07:48,777
Having a family. I was
happy with the two of us.
169
00:07:50,941 --> 00:07:51,942
(INAUDIBLE)
170
00:07:52,773 --> 00:07:53,873
Hey, girls.
171
00:07:53,874 --> 00:07:55,104
Hey.
172
00:07:55,105 --> 00:07:56,646
Hey, Rube, Mommy and Daddy
173
00:07:56,647 --> 00:07:58,578
need to speak to Gracie alone.
174
00:07:58,579 --> 00:07:59,650
Okay.
175
00:08:01,682 --> 00:08:03,052
Here's my Crunchy Chunk, Daddy.
176
00:08:03,053 --> 00:08:05,015
I don't want to get in trouble.
177
00:08:08,088 --> 00:08:09,158
Doesn't anybody in this house
178
00:08:09,159 --> 00:08:10,791
eat a candy bar
when they get it?
179
00:08:12,863 --> 00:08:14,093
(STAMMERING)
180
00:08:14,094 --> 00:08:15,125
Go.
181
00:08:16,627 --> 00:08:17,798
Come on.
182
00:08:20,701 --> 00:08:21,772
Hey.
183
00:08:24,174 --> 00:08:25,676
Hi, Gracie.
184
00:08:26,577 --> 00:08:27,738
Grapes.
185
00:08:28,779 --> 00:08:30,240
Gracie Gumdrops.
186
00:08:32,543 --> 00:08:34,463
All right, I'll give you
two bucks to talk to me.
187
00:08:40,691 --> 00:08:41,792
What?
188
00:08:43,554 --> 00:08:46,556
Look, um, about this, uh,
189
00:08:46,557 --> 00:08:48,228
Crunchy Chunk situation...
190
00:08:49,560 --> 00:08:51,662
I got some bad intelligence.
191
00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:58,107
So, uh, this
grounding thing is...
192
00:08:58,108 --> 00:08:59,910
It's off. It's over.
It's done.
193
00:09:02,012 --> 00:09:03,543
I'm sorry.
194
00:09:04,615 --> 00:09:05,846
And your mother's sorry.
195
00:09:10,981 --> 00:09:12,623
Uh, and me too.
196
00:09:13,824 --> 00:09:15,585
So, what do you say?
197
00:09:15,586 --> 00:09:17,327
Apology not accepted.
198
00:09:19,860 --> 00:09:21,591
What do you mean,
apology's not accepted?
199
00:09:21,592 --> 00:09:23,062
I just gave you two bucks!
200
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,294
Jim, technically, the
money was for talking,
201
00:09:25,295 --> 00:09:27,867
not for an apology.
202
00:09:27,868 --> 00:09:30,070
Well, aren't we lucky
you were here to catch that?
203
00:09:32,302 --> 00:09:36,677
Gracie, sweetie,
everybody, including parents,
204
00:09:38,008 --> 00:09:39,308
make mistakes.
205
00:09:39,309 --> 00:09:42,081
Now, Daddy made a mistake,
and he's admitting it.
206
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:45,755
But he didn't believe me.
That hurt my feelings.
207
00:09:45,756 --> 00:09:47,658
Look, your mother
said I was sorry,
208
00:09:49,259 --> 00:09:50,860
and you're $2 richer.
209
00:09:50,861 --> 00:09:52,622
You know, I think
that's a pretty good day
210
00:09:52,623 --> 00:09:54,024
for a little girl like you.
211
00:09:55,666 --> 00:09:57,997
And next time, Mommy
and Daddy will believe you.
212
00:09:57,998 --> 00:09:59,029
We promise.
213
00:09:59,970 --> 00:10:01,632
What do you say?
214
00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:04,073
Oh.
215
00:10:04,074 --> 00:10:05,604
Aw.
Thank you.
216
00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:07,677
Does that mean I get
my Game Boy now?
217
00:10:07,678 --> 00:10:10,139
Well, I don't see why
not. Uh, uh, uh, easy.
218
00:10:10,140 --> 00:10:13,083
You don't want to give the
keys to the kingdom away.
219
00:10:13,944 --> 00:10:15,915
Right. Right.
No Game Boy.
220
00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:17,146
You know, you still
wrote on that mirror.
221
00:10:17,147 --> 00:10:19,148
That's right.
222
00:10:19,149 --> 00:10:20,349
Although, you know,
on the upside,
223
00:10:20,350 --> 00:10:22,653
you did spell "boogers"
right this time.
224
00:10:26,356 --> 00:10:28,057
Okay, halftime.
225
00:10:28,058 --> 00:10:29,699
What do you say we watch
the second half at my place?
226
00:10:29,700 --> 00:10:30,930
Nah.
227
00:10:30,931 --> 00:10:32,732
Why not? It's just
across the street.
228
00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:34,804
I know what's gonna happen.
229
00:10:34,805 --> 00:10:37,306
I'm gonna toss back a few beers,
230
00:10:37,307 --> 00:10:39,038
I'm gonna have to go
to the bathroom.
231
00:10:39,039 --> 00:10:40,209
When I ask you if I
can use your bathroom,
232
00:10:40,210 --> 00:10:42,090
you're gonna say no,
and I gotta come back here.
233
00:10:44,244 --> 00:10:47,417
Oh, my God, Jim. I can't
believe how petty you think I am.
234
00:10:49,019 --> 00:10:50,981
(WHISPERING) Too soon! Too soon!
235
00:10:52,823 --> 00:10:54,724
Hey, girls.
How was the park?
236
00:10:54,725 --> 00:10:56,956
I went all the way across
the monkey bars and back.
237
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:58,187
Oh, good for you.
238
00:10:58,188 --> 00:10:59,689
Yeah, and I tried to read a book
239
00:10:59,690 --> 00:11:01,130
while she yelled,
"Watch me! Watch me!
240
00:11:01,131 --> 00:11:02,933
"Watch me!
Watch me! Watch me!"
241
00:11:04,795 --> 00:11:06,696
Oh, wow!
You guys broke down
242
00:11:06,697 --> 00:11:07,967
and bought Gracie
a Game Boy, huh?
243
00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:09,840
First game!
Called it.
244
00:11:10,801 --> 00:11:11,872
I didn't get her that.
245
00:11:13,343 --> 00:11:15,905
Neither did I. Did you
see something at the park?
246
00:11:15,906 --> 00:11:19,249
Hey, unless I hear crying or
stranger danger, I don't look up.
247
00:11:21,952 --> 00:11:23,152
Cheryl, she stole it!
248
00:11:23,153 --> 00:11:24,383
Oh!
249
00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:26,816
No, she stole that Game Boy!
Gracie, get down here!
250
00:11:26,817 --> 00:11:29,218
(STAMMERING)
Calm down, Jim.
251
00:11:29,219 --> 00:11:30,960
You're getting that
vein thing in your neck
252
00:11:30,961 --> 00:11:32,401
like that time
I smiled at the valet.
253
00:11:33,393 --> 00:11:35,324
Cheryl, she wanted a video game,
254
00:11:35,325 --> 00:11:37,226
we told her she couldn't
have a video game,
255
00:11:37,227 --> 00:11:39,128
and she comes home
with a video game!
256
00:11:39,129 --> 00:11:41,030
I did the same exact thing
when I was a kid
257
00:11:41,031 --> 00:11:44,033
except for it was
a Batman lunchbox
258
00:11:44,034 --> 00:11:45,375
and later on it was a Camaro.
259
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:50,741
Watch out for the gremlins! Use
the magic sword! Way to go, Andy.
260
00:11:52,482 --> 00:11:53,983
Okay, hey.
Let me handle this.
261
00:11:53,984 --> 00:11:54,985
I... I... I...
262
00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:58,748
All right. Be strong.
Okay, okay.
263
00:11:58,749 --> 00:12:01,350
Be a rock!
Okay! Okay!
264
00:12:01,351 --> 00:12:02,421
Hi.
265
00:12:02,422 --> 00:12:04,023
Hey, sweetie.
266
00:12:04,024 --> 00:12:06,295
Can you tell Mommy and
Daddy where you got that?
267
00:12:06,296 --> 00:12:08,157
Uh, at the park.
268
00:12:08,158 --> 00:12:10,159
Really? From who?
269
00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:11,431
Um, my friend Annie.
270
00:12:12,502 --> 00:12:14,765
Okay.
Not okay!
271
00:12:15,966 --> 00:12:17,436
Not okay at all.
272
00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:19,168
You call that being a rock?
273
00:12:19,169 --> 00:12:20,170
Well, I'm a nice rock.
274
00:12:22,773 --> 00:12:23,914
Annie, huh?
275
00:12:26,076 --> 00:12:28,077
I don't know any Annie.
276
00:12:28,078 --> 00:12:29,448
You don't know
any of my friends.
277
00:12:29,449 --> 00:12:32,321
(SCOFFS)
That is not true.
278
00:12:32,322 --> 00:12:36,055
There's, um, glasses and, um...
279
00:12:36,056 --> 00:12:37,057
Overbite.
280
00:12:38,829 --> 00:12:40,060
And the one with the hot mom.
281
00:12:42,192 --> 00:12:44,063
Hey, if you can throw
yourself at a valet,
282
00:12:44,064 --> 00:12:46,496
I can notice a nice
tight pair of yoga pants.
283
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:49,768
All right, what's her last name?
284
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:51,500
I don't know, honey.
I see her in carpool.
285
00:12:51,501 --> 00:12:53,142
I smile at her once in a while.
286
00:12:53,143 --> 00:12:54,503
That's all. Really.
That's it. No!
287
00:12:54,504 --> 00:12:56,877
What's Annie's last name?
288
00:13:00,510 --> 00:13:01,912
Annie...
289
00:13:04,014 --> 00:13:05,415
Where's she from?
290
00:13:06,917 --> 00:13:09,088
Jupiter?
291
00:13:09,089 --> 00:13:11,260
Jupiter? Wow,
well, let me ask you.
292
00:13:11,261 --> 00:13:13,863
Is she adjusting to
the gravity all right?
293
00:13:13,864 --> 00:13:15,194
Oh.
294
00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:17,026
You believe me,
don't you, Mommy?
295
00:13:17,027 --> 00:13:18,297
You promised me you would.
296
00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:19,899
That's right.
297
00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:22,371
Mommy promised, so
we have to believe you.
298
00:13:22,372 --> 00:13:25,074
Thanks, Mommy.
Here.
299
00:13:25,075 --> 00:13:27,076
Thanks!
Hey!
300
00:13:27,077 --> 00:13:29,508
"We'll believe you next
time, honey. We promise."
301
00:13:29,509 --> 00:13:30,980
How could you say that to her?
302
00:13:30,981 --> 00:13:32,842
I was trying
to be a good parent,
303
00:13:32,843 --> 00:13:34,284
thereby bringing
her total to one.
304
00:13:34,915 --> 00:13:36,485
Ah, come on.
305
00:13:36,486 --> 00:13:40,089
Well, excuse me for
trusting my own kid.
306
00:13:40,090 --> 00:13:45,394
Honey, everybody knows that
the road to hell is paved with trust.
307
00:13:45,395 --> 00:13:47,897
You know, I want to write my
own parenting book one day.
308
00:13:47,898 --> 00:13:49,459
Guilty!
End of story!
309
00:13:58,038 --> 00:14:00,440
She got a Game Boy
from an alien at the park.
310
00:14:03,143 --> 00:14:05,374
What kind of story is that?
311
00:14:05,375 --> 00:14:07,246
Are you sure
you didn't see anything?
312
00:14:07,247 --> 00:14:10,921
How many times do I have to
tell you? I don't pay attention.
313
00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:13,582
All right, you know
what? That's it.
314
00:14:13,583 --> 00:14:15,524
No more taking
the kids to the park.
315
00:14:15,525 --> 00:14:18,058
Oh, no, not that.
Anything but that.
316
00:14:21,331 --> 00:14:23,232
All right, Jim, you know what?
317
00:14:23,233 --> 00:14:24,964
We have to be
100% sure she did it,
318
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,436
'cause if we punish her and
it turns out she's innocent,
319
00:14:27,437 --> 00:14:30,299
we're gonna lose any shred of
credibility we have left as parents.
320
00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:32,042
ANDY: She's right.
321
00:14:35,445 --> 00:14:37,347
You need hard evidence.
322
00:14:38,278 --> 00:14:40,110
You need a clean collar.
323
00:14:41,051 --> 00:14:42,511
How?
324
00:14:42,512 --> 00:14:44,013
She's not gonna talk.
325
00:14:44,014 --> 00:14:46,455
Oh, not Gracie.
326
00:14:46,456 --> 00:14:48,217
But I think there
may be a little bird
327
00:14:48,218 --> 00:14:50,160
in this family who may
be willing to sing.
328
00:14:51,361 --> 00:14:52,922
Ruby?
329
00:14:52,923 --> 00:14:54,024
I-22.
330
00:14:56,666 --> 00:14:57,968
Bingo.
331
00:15:01,631 --> 00:15:03,402
She won't even know
we're grilling her.
332
00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,504
She'll just think she's
having a little ice cream
333
00:15:05,505 --> 00:15:07,676
with her friendly
aunt and uncle.
334
00:15:07,677 --> 00:15:10,981
You know, I like it! We
can play good cop, fat cop.
335
00:15:15,385 --> 00:15:17,625
So, can I put some more
sprinkles on there for you, Rube?
336
00:15:18,688 --> 00:15:20,250
There you go.
337
00:15:22,252 --> 00:15:23,993
Ooh, and chocolate syrup, too!
338
00:15:23,994 --> 00:15:25,555
Not so fast, angel.
339
00:15:28,258 --> 00:15:30,159
So, last night,
I couldn't help notice
340
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:32,661
you hid your peas
under your mashed potatoes.
341
00:15:32,662 --> 00:15:35,135
I was hiding them from
you. You steal food.
342
00:15:36,206 --> 00:15:37,937
Hey, hey, hey! Andy,
ease up, ease up!
343
00:15:39,469 --> 00:15:40,971
She's just a kid.
344
00:15:44,114 --> 00:15:45,574
Sorry about that, Rube.
345
00:15:45,575 --> 00:15:47,676
Look, you tell us
what we want to know,
346
00:15:47,677 --> 00:15:50,579
and I make that whole
pea thing go away.
347
00:15:50,580 --> 00:15:54,053
(LAUGHS) Aunt Dana,
you said "pee."
348
00:15:54,054 --> 00:15:57,426
Well, well, well. We got
ourselves a real comedian here.
349
00:15:57,427 --> 00:16:00,960
Do you tap dance, too? 'Cause
I'm really enjoying the show.
350
00:16:03,393 --> 00:16:05,434
Now...
351
00:16:05,435 --> 00:16:09,498
Where did Gracie
get the video game?
352
00:16:09,499 --> 00:16:12,572
(MIMICKING ANDY) Her
friend Annie at the park.
353
00:16:15,305 --> 00:16:17,606
Okay, so there is an Annie.
Have you met her?
354
00:16:17,607 --> 00:16:18,747
No. I was
on the monkey bars.
355
00:16:18,748 --> 00:16:22,111
Right!
Monkey bars! Yes!
356
00:16:22,112 --> 00:16:24,213
You know what I don't
like about that story?
357
00:16:24,214 --> 00:16:25,555
Everything!
358
00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:29,489
Andy, Andy, Andy,
walk away! Walk away!
359
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:32,292
Just walk away!
360
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:39,268
Oh, man.
361
00:16:39,269 --> 00:16:41,530
Look, Rube, I know
where you're coming from.
362
00:16:41,531 --> 00:16:43,402
I mean, I have a sister, too.
363
00:16:43,403 --> 00:16:44,534
Who?
364
00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:46,536
Your mom.
365
00:16:48,378 --> 00:16:50,779
And sometimes,
you know, I tell on her
366
00:16:50,780 --> 00:16:52,611
because it's good for her.
367
00:16:52,612 --> 00:16:56,745
So help me to help you
and tell us what you know.
368
00:16:56,746 --> 00:16:58,717
Well...
Yeah?
369
00:16:58,718 --> 00:17:01,351
I know that
nine times nine is 99.
370
00:17:05,755 --> 00:17:07,696
CHERYL: What happened?
371
00:17:07,697 --> 00:17:11,029
Kid won't crack. She's
made of stone. Stone, I tell ya.
372
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,732
Oh, and she needs
help with her math.
373
00:17:15,165 --> 00:17:16,805
What are we gonna do
about Gracie?
374
00:17:16,806 --> 00:17:19,638
The only thing
a responsible parent can do.
375
00:17:19,639 --> 00:17:21,111
Set her up and entrap her.
376
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,054
Hey, Gracie, come here.
377
00:17:36,086 --> 00:17:37,726
So, is your friend Annie here?
378
00:17:37,727 --> 00:17:39,188
Yeah.
379
00:17:39,189 --> 00:17:40,659
Well, where is she?
380
00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,331
I don't know.
Around.
381
00:17:42,332 --> 00:17:43,732
Around, huh?
382
00:17:43,733 --> 00:17:44,763
Mmm-hmm.
383
00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:46,596
Hmm. Uh, wait.
Gracie, come here.
384
00:17:48,138 --> 00:17:51,100
Here is a cupcake.
385
00:17:51,101 --> 00:17:52,341
Your mom wants you
to give it to Annie
386
00:17:52,342 --> 00:17:54,843
to thank her for the Game Boy.
387
00:17:54,844 --> 00:17:56,106
Okay.
Okay.
388
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:09,288
Ah! Look at that.
389
00:18:09,289 --> 00:18:11,220
The trap is set.
390
00:18:11,221 --> 00:18:13,622
All right, if she
eats the cupcake,
391
00:18:13,623 --> 00:18:16,795
we know there is no Annie,
she's lying, and we win.
392
00:18:16,796 --> 00:18:18,267
That doesn't mean we win.
393
00:18:18,268 --> 00:18:21,099
It means our daughter
is a liar and a thief.
394
00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:23,173
Why is the glass
always half empty with you?
395
00:18:27,877 --> 00:18:29,508
(SIGHS)
(GASPS)
396
00:18:29,509 --> 00:18:31,340
Oh, my God.
397
00:18:31,341 --> 00:18:32,642
There is a darkness there.
398
00:18:33,883 --> 00:18:35,584
Don't blame yourself, Cheryl.
399
00:18:35,585 --> 00:18:37,547
It's my sick, twisted genes.
400
00:18:39,149 --> 00:18:40,549
CHERYL: Wait a minute.
Maybe that's Annie.
401
00:18:40,550 --> 00:18:43,152
Come on, she ate the
cupcake. She's lying.
402
00:18:43,153 --> 00:18:44,653
Could we just give her
the benefit of the doubt?
403
00:18:44,654 --> 00:18:46,726
That is why we're spying on her.
404
00:18:49,799 --> 00:18:50,859
All right, I'm gonna go.
405
00:18:50,860 --> 00:18:52,161
What are you doing?
406
00:18:52,162 --> 00:18:53,402
I've got a plan.
407
00:18:53,403 --> 00:18:54,863
Don't let her see you.
408
00:18:54,864 --> 00:18:57,267
Well, that's kind of the
cornerstone of the plan, Cheryl,
409
00:18:57,767 --> 00:18:59,269
but thanks.
410
00:19:08,278 --> 00:19:10,419
Hey there.
Can I help you?
411
00:19:10,420 --> 00:19:11,721
Nope.
I'm just spying.
412
00:19:14,184 --> 00:19:15,924
Oh, no, no.
Not on everyone.
413
00:19:15,925 --> 00:19:17,687
Just that one little girl.
414
00:19:18,788 --> 00:19:20,489
Come on, freak!
Let's go!
415
00:19:20,490 --> 00:19:22,192
What? Ow! Wait!
416
00:19:27,437 --> 00:19:28,797
Okay, kid, hold it.
417
00:19:28,798 --> 00:19:31,169
Safety inspector here.
418
00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:32,302
Got some complaints.
419
00:19:32,842 --> 00:19:34,204
That's a yogurt card.
420
00:19:36,306 --> 00:19:38,707
(MOCKING BOY)
That's a yogurt card.
421
00:19:38,708 --> 00:19:40,380
Hey, I'm undercover.
Beat it!
422
00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:03,233
(GRUNTING)
423
00:20:17,687 --> 00:20:19,589
How do babies do this?
424
00:20:21,821 --> 00:20:23,353
(GRUNTING)
425
00:20:30,860 --> 00:20:32,961
And I saw this dog
with a cat on its back.
426
00:20:32,962 --> 00:20:34,303
It was silly.
427
00:20:34,304 --> 00:20:36,365
That's funny, Annie.
428
00:20:36,366 --> 00:20:38,006
Can I have some of that cupcake?
429
00:20:38,007 --> 00:20:41,470
No, it's mine! But thank
you for the Game Boy.
430
00:20:41,471 --> 00:20:44,643
It's okay. You're my friend,
and I had two, anyway.
431
00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:46,004
Want to go play
on the monkey bars?
432
00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:52,382
(GRUNTS)
433
00:20:52,922 --> 00:20:54,383
So?
434
00:20:54,384 --> 00:20:55,554
That was Annie.
435
00:20:55,555 --> 00:20:56,685
(SIGHS)
436
00:20:56,686 --> 00:20:58,387
But Gracie ate the cupcake.
437
00:20:58,388 --> 00:20:59,529
She's only human.
438
00:21:01,391 --> 00:21:03,392
But she didn't
steal the Game Boy.
439
00:21:03,393 --> 00:21:06,895
Wow. So after all this,
Gracie's innocent.
440
00:21:06,896 --> 00:21:08,497
Again.
Yeah.
441
00:21:08,498 --> 00:21:09,668
Yeah. Her alibi
is as tight
442
00:21:09,669 --> 00:21:11,371
as this tunnel around my ass!
443
00:21:14,374 --> 00:21:16,305
I hate myself.
444
00:21:16,306 --> 00:21:17,907
Man, are you guys bad parents.
445
00:21:19,309 --> 00:21:20,579
Hey, how about a hand here?
446
00:21:20,580 --> 00:21:22,681
Hey, how about a hand?
447
00:21:22,682 --> 00:21:23,853
You stuck, inspector?
448
00:21:25,315 --> 00:21:27,616
Yes. Yes, I am.
Can you give me a hand?
449
00:21:27,617 --> 00:21:29,419
Yeah, yeah. Bite me!
450
00:21:33,563 --> 00:21:34,894
(GRUNTING)
451
00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:38,398
Help!
29341
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