Original subtitles

We're going to go for a spring break this year. What do you mean? We're going

go to Fort Lauderdale like always, silly.

Yeah, that's what I mean, like always.

Fort Lauderdale is from back in the day.

It's too been -there -done -that kind of place.

Listen to this brochure.

Tired of the same old spring break rut?

Try Edmistic Desert Wells, the acceptable alternative to spring break

Steeped in mystery, adventure, nature, and the unknown.

Just like Palm Springs without the haircut.

Hey, I don't get that, but it is dirt cheap.

Mystic Desert World, look out!

That means all new batches of summer school sluts. Ooh, I like that. So

of spring break sluts, we have summer sluts, right?

You got it.

I think that in 2 ,000 years, men would prefer to suck my toes barefoot or open

-toed shoes.

Hmm. What do you think, Katie?

I think in 2 ,000 years, men are going to be such big perverts, they're going

have toe suckeries and they're going to do all of it.

I think so, too. Mm -hmm.

So, you finally glad to get away?

If I have to listen to one more indoctrination lecture, I'm going to

sideways through my skirt.

You think there's enough room?

Room for what?

You all have to be comfortable.

Comfortable enough for you to lick my tan lines.

Oh, yeah, lick my ass.

South Hodad Surfers in January.

cock in my brain.

participating in any of the kids' activities.

a course on eating pussy instead of the difference between a gecko and a

chuckwump.

I want to be a pony girl too.

You want

to practice that with us? Uh huh.

Are you ready for my cut?

the story of ten years of bloody battle between the Greeks and the Trojans. The

war was sparked by Trojan ambassador Paris seducing Menelaus' wife Helen and

taking her back to Troy.

During the course of the war, numerous battles took place and many died on both

sides. Achilles, the greatest of the Greek warriors, slew countless Trojans.

But in the tenth year of the war, the Amazons, led by Queen Penthesilea,

the Trojan forces.

She was killed in battle by Achilles, as was King Memnon of Ethiopia.

Achilles' career as the greatest warrior then came to an end when Paris, with

the help of Apollo, killed him with an arrow which pierced him in the heel.

Odysseus was considered the more clever hero, and not surprisingly, he was

protected by Athena, goddess of wisdom.

After Achilles was killed, he held the Trojans back and was the one to convince

50 Greek soldiers to hide inside the Trojan horse.

It was built by Appius and left in front of Troy. He told the Trojans that the

horse was an offering to Athena.

The Greek army then withdrew. The Trojans tore down a part of the wall,

the horse inside, and celebrated their apparent victory.

At night, when the Trojans had fallen asleep, the Greek soldiers, hidden in

horse, came out.

opened the gates and gave the signal to the main army, which had been in hiding.

The city was totally destroyed.

You know, I've been trying to fuck Helen up for six months. I don't think she

likes men.

Well, she hits on us all the time. She doesn't have a problem with girls.

Maybe it's your technique.

There's nothing wrong with my technique.

Hey, aren't you the star of that Trojan army?

Yes, I killed that motherfucker Achilles. He's such a heel.

What else do you do to impress girls?

want your thoughts with us.

Us mythological characters need to get the hell out of here.

the end.

I have an idea.

I want to take you girls to the Isle of Lesbos with me.

And I would think about taking Paris, but he'd just try and molest all of us,

probably. You?

Yeah, I understand what you mean. Arthur can be such a pain in my ass sometimes.

You know, sometimes the ice cream man doesn't serve ice cream.

You got that right.

At least we have each other.

This is perfect

You know, I was thinking.

oh baby blow like the wind

I fucking hate Dickens for breakfast.

Fuck me.

Oh, fuck yeah, you are just so good.

Yeah, I think we're good.

Get it, woman.

Fuck it all up.

Next time, I think I want you to stick it up my

ass.

I think we can make that a date.

Ladies? Who are you?

I am glorious Victorious Bongwater.

Praetorius of all Rome.

And if I were your emperor, you'd have one suit each.

One suit.

I'm Helen of Troy.

We don't need your help.

Are you sure you don't need my help, ma 'am?

All right, then.

I'll be off.

One day.

That looks good.

Do you like big talk?

Yeah.

Big talk? Yeah.

She's got it in there.

I see a moon.

fierce desire of Menelaus that the world not find out that his wife Helen was a

dyke. Thus, the Trojan War lingered on for ten more years.

But before Helen was returned to her rightful husband, she had one more

encounter.

um

Ironically, some stories claim that the real Han never went to Troy, for she was

carried off to Egypt by the god Hermes.

And Paris actually took her twin sister, Hydemnestra, to Troy.

Thank you for your support.