Original subtitles

[instrumental music]

? Waynehead Waynehead ?

? The party's just begun ?

? Waynehead Waynehead ?

? That's the 411 for fun ?

? Hey hoo ?

? Hey hoo ?

? Hey hoo ?

? Waynehead Waynehead ?

? The party's just begun ?

? Waynehead Waynehead ?

? That's the 411 for fun ?

? Hey hoo ?

? Hey hoo ?

? Wah ahh ahh ahh ahhh ?

? Hey ?

? Waynehead Waynehead ?

[scatting]

? Waynehead Waynehead ?

? The party's just begun ?

? Waynehead Waynehead ?

? That's the 411 for fun ?

? Hey hoo ?

? Hey hoo ?

? Waynehead ??

[instrumental music]

[snoring]

pop

Shush!

[snoring continues]

[static buzz]

[gasps]

? Hey hoo ?

? Hey hoo ?

Get out of my house, you little donkey!

[indistinct grumbling]

Just get away from here. Get, get away from here.

Argh!

Ow!

Read this.

Heavy D is giving a charity concert tomorrow

at Washington Square Park.

[indistinct chatter]

It's gonna be a bomb!

Don't get too excited, knuckleheads.

It costs $20 to get in.

Chump change, Roz.

My daddy makes that at tips.

Marvin, they don't give tips for making license plates.

I-I-I told you my daddy wasn't arrested.

He was just detained.

'Cause me and my daddy was in with Denzel Washington.

And-and a carjacker on our block looked like Denzel too..

- And so-- - You're such a liar.

[thuds]

You know what. My pops is selling tickets to that concert.

And he wouldn't even give you a ticket?

Please!

My pops don't give away nothin'.

I earn my keeps.

I'm one ten year old rent-paying youngster.

[Marvin groans]

Check this, we could get in free by donating

a bag of canned goods for the homeless.

Homeless?

Yo, Toof! How are these gonna help your families?

[Toof laughs]

You stupid, Damey.

[indistinct chatter]

I'll knock you up, man.

Waynehead, lookout!

[intense music]

Ooh!

What are you doing, Waynehead?

You almost backed into the hydrant of doom.

I'd say that's some bad luck, brother.

I can handle a little bad luck.

A little bad luck?

Lemme drop some knowledge on your dumb self.

The hydrant of doom is the cause of all bad luck.

You heard of the Hindenburg, haven't you?

[dramatic music]

(Marvin) This is on a wheel, see?

That big blip took a detour to the hood

because of some police activity.

[water splashes]

That's exactly when the hydrant struck.

And the next thing you know,

everything was swimmin' in bad luck.

And then there was a problem with the Titanic.

[water dripping]

[water splashes]

Hey, hey, hey! I know what most people think.

They think that boat sank because of an iceberg.

[tires screeching]

But, I'm here to tell you,

the real problem was the hydrant of doom.

And a ten pound ham that was kept to be the easter dinner

at the midtown shelter for serial killers

with no self-esteem.

[dramatic music]

[ships horn blaring]

[crashes]

Yeah, and Waterloo, Watergate, Whitewater

they all started right here at the hydrant of doom.

Thank, Mo. You saved my life.

Yo, I hate to break up the sissy male bonding

but we've got some cans to collect.

[instrumental music]

[fly buzzing]

Mama, I wanna go to a concert.

And I need a bag of canned foods to give to Heavy D.

We don't have no food to be giving to Heavy D.

[whoosh]

Besides, that darn boy is big enough already.

Then I'm going to ask the neighbors for cans. Okay. Bye.

After you spend time with that nice new boy from Africa, Aki.

Aki?

Man, I don't wanna hang with him.

- He's a nerd. - He's from Botswana.

They're just a little different, culturally.

And I promised his mother that

you would hang out with him today.

He's homesick for Africa.

bam

Now, go.

[bangs]

I've been waiting on you, Waynehead.

We gotta go get some cans.

My mom is making me hang with Aki.

- I'll catch you later. - 'Aki?'

(Toof) 'Dang. They don't come no more doofus than that boy.'

clink

[clattering]

Man, too bad. You gonna miss the concert.

I feel sorry for you, but, hey, we gotta roll.

Heavy D is awaiting. We're out.

Yeah. See you guys later.

[instrumental music]

[sighs]

(Aki) Damey, I am so excited.

I have our whole day planned with really happening events.

Yeah. Can't wait.

First, we can go to that African museum exhibit.

Then, to the home of a friend who is from Botswana.

[inhales heavily]

Yo, man. What's up with your breathing?

Sorry, Damey. I sometimes... when I get excited.

Great. We're in the house, now.

He even walks cool.

[upbeat music]

Can I have this?

Eh, give it here.

[instrumental music]

(Aki) 'This reminds me of home.'

When I feel sad, I come here and stare at it.

For how long?

For many, many hours.

Yo, if you squint, it looks just like Jersey.

I think I've seen enough.

Where to next?

[instrumental music]

And when I was 12

my father gave me a most beautiful medallion.

Very similar, in fact, to the one that Aki wears.

Dang! This is fab.

No wonder you wear it in your shirt.

[indistinct]

For this bad boy.

Thank you very much.

Would you like to go to the African marketplace place now?

[instrumental music]

Dance of good fortune.

In Botswana, it is believed to bring good luck.

[Aki inhales heavily]

They wouldn't make it on a soul train with that.

Damn, I'm not gonna have time to collect any cans.

whoosh

Aki, we're going to something really cool now.

And it's called collecting cans.

(Waynehead) 'You're gonna love it.'

[Aki inhaling]

? Wayne Wayne Wayne Wayne Wayne Wayne Waynehead ?

? Wayne Wayne Wayne Wayne Wayne Wayne Waynehead ?

[instrumental music]

If I'm gonna get all the cans I need, I gotta move fast.

- So just stay out of way, okay. - Okay, my cool friend.

You are so cool, Damey.

This is my best time in America.

- 'Can we do this everyday?' - Just wait over there.

[gasps]

[intense music]

The hydrant of doom!

[gasps]

[crashing]

Ah!

No!

No!

Ohhh!

Aki, you alright?

Damey, why did you tackle me?

Um, no reason.

[intense music]

I gotta get him off the street before something bad happens.

Look. Canned goods.

Uff! Ohh, dang! Trouble already.

[intense music]

Damey, look!

Yo. Drop those cans!

[Aki gasping]

Get him!

[Waynehead gasps]

[intense music]

Aki. Throw the other cans.

You're gonna me get beat down!

What does beat down mean?

[Waynehead panting]

- Woah! - Sorry.

[Waynehead panting]

(Waynehead) 'Aki, watch out. That's wet paint, man.'

I must not ruin my brand new footwear from the Flea market.

screech

Ohh, man.

Dang. We look stupid.

Oh!

[engine revving]

(Aki) 'Oh, my!'

Hey, Waynehead.

Are those candy yams you're wearing?

Yo, man, check it, Toof.

Aki touched the hydrant of doom.

Look. I'm gonna make him stay at my place tonight protect him.

Round up the gang and tell 'em to come by

with some cures for bad luck.

Okay, but can I lick your shirt first.

[instrumental music]

Mama, since Kevin is gone for the weekend

can Aki spend the night?

Boy, what have you been in?

You stink like Mrs. Turner's sweet potato pie.

But it sure is nice to see you two gettin' along.

Eeeeh! Am I staying the night?

[Aki inhales heavily]

By the great lion of Botswana.

Are we brothers, Damey? Are we? Huh?

Mom, could you show my bro here where to find his bedsheets.

Yo. What's the verdict?

Got your back, Waynehead.

What you do is spin his head around six times.

You stupid. His head will pop off.

Yeah. You usually gotta call a expert in

but we probably could do it ourselves.

(Mo) My father has an overcoat full of mojos and good luck charms.

But, you know it's gonna cost you eight dollars

just to look inside though.

I've got a box of lucky stars, but I accidently ate

all the tasty fruit that covered lucky parts.

[Toof laughs]

That's okay, guys. I'll handle it myself.

[water splashing]

I've ruined Aki's life.

He's a dead man. I'm going to need an alibi.

I have never had so much fun in one day.

That dance of good fortune must be what brought us

all these good luck.

Yo. The dance of good fortunes!

It brings you good luck.

[Waynehead yawns]

Yup. So tired.

You must be tired.

Peace.

[instrumental music]

[Aki inhales heavily]

[clock ticking]

[snoring]

[coughs]

[music continues]

I hope this works.

[folk music]

[snoring]

[instrumental music]

[beat box music]

? Waynehead ?

[upbeat music]

Five more dollars and pops will Jheri curl your dreadlocks.

Hello, Mo' Money junior.

Hello, Mr. Money.

Hey, young buck. How about a finger wave?

Your neck's a little knotty.

Not today, Mr. Money.

But, because Damey and I have become such good friends

I wish to buy two Heavy D tickets for us.

$40. I knew there was something I liked about you.

All I have is two dollars.

Well, I give you two dollars worth of a ticket.

May be I can exchange this for the tickets.

[chimes]

[instrumental music]

He's gone.

Ohh, dang. The hydrant of doom.

Something's happened to Aki.

Mommy, something's happened to Aki.

He touched the hydrant of doom and then we had bad luck.

The robbers! Yams! Paint!

Then I put all your make up and danced like the Africans

but you know I got the bad foot and now he disappeared.

It's all my fault.

[Waynehead crying]

[instrumental music]

It's my fault he touched the hydrant of doom.

He's doomed.

Damey, calm down.

Yeah. Calm down.

bam bam

(Mrs. Wayne) Baby, it's nothing but silly superstition.

'That hydrant's not bad luck.'

It's not?

Please. That hydrant saved Mrs. Jefferson's home

after it caught fire last summer.

- So, Aki isn't doomed? - No.

(Mrs. Wayne) 'I'm glad you two have become such good friends.'

Now, just calm down and go wash all my make up off your face.

But, we're not friends. Aki's a nerd.

'I had him stay here just to keep him out of trouble'

'after he touched that hydrant.'

After today, he has to find someone else to hang with.

I have a image to keep up.

I can't have a dweeb in my crew.

Boy, do you know how stupid you sound?

[door closes]

I thought we had a talk about this.

You promised you'd stop hauling home all kinds of useless junk.

Junk? Woman, this could make a perfectly good, um, hmm..

Paper weight.

Mmm-hmm. That's what I thought.

(Mr. Wayne) 'Ohh, I almost forgot, son.'

These two Heavy D tickets.

I ran into Aki on the street just now.

He said they were for you and a friend you really like.

Ooh! I'm in the house.

Dang.

[instrumental music]

(Waynehead) 'Yo, peep this, man.'

Aki's just bought me two Heavy D tickets.

Clear the way, knuckleheads.

[crashes]

You guys are suckers.

I only had to make one stop at Mrs. Jeffersons.

'The day care lady.'

'All she buys is warehouse size groceries.'

Yo, Waynehead. I saw Aki a few minutes ago.

'He feels real bad that you called him a nerd.'

'He heard you talkin' to your mom.'

[gulps] He did?

[beat box music]

? Waynehead din-taka-taka taku ?

? Waynehead ?

? Waynehead ?

[instrumental music]

[indistinct chatter]

Yo, what's the worry, fellows?

And, uh, you too, monster girl.

Yo, Mo. Where did you get this medallion?

Uhh, this little yankee doo.

Aki gave it to my pops for two Heavy D tickets.

'He said you two were bros now,'

so he was taking you to the concert.

Ahh-haa, Waynehead.

'How do you feel about two free tickets now?'

(Mo) 'You've got two tickets, Waynehead.'

Lemme scout one.

I'll wait till everybody goes inside.

Then the concert will be sold up.

Then, brothers will start getting desperate

and bam, that's more money, more money, more money.

I gotta go find Aki.

[instrumental music]

(Waynehead) 'Aki!'

(male #1) 'Shut up!'

Man, I've been looking all over for you.

I'm-I'm sorry for calling you a nerd.

You gave up your medallion so that I can go to the concert.

'That was cool.'

I was just being the friend to you

that I thought you were being to me.

I still have the tickets if you want to go to the concert.

Okay, my bro.

- That's not cool, Aki. - Sorry.

(Security) Sorry, little man. But the concert is oversold.

No more seats.

[tires screeching]

- 'Heavy D!' - Hey, my little brothers.

How come you two aren't in the concert?

Man, the concert oversold.

Now, we can't get in. Even though we have tickets.

Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm not having that.

That's no way to treat the fans of the over-weight lover.

? I've got tons of love for you baby ?

? I've got tons of love for you honey ?

? I know you want lots of gyms and stuffs ?

? Backyards with swimming pool ?

? Bars with stools ?

? Lobster sushi Versace Gucci crazy luchi ?

[gasping]

Oh-oh!

Hey. If you gonna jam with me, jam with me on stage.

[audience applauds]

? I've got nothing but love for you ?

? Nothing but love for you baby ?

? I've got nothing but love for you ?

? Okay okay okay okay ?

? Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah ?

- This turned out great. - Yeah. It's the bomb!

? I've got nothing but love for you honey ?

? I've got nothing but love for you baby ?

? I've got nothing but love for you honey ??

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