Original subtitles

with you. And I wish you wouldn't.

This is a garlic roll, which for you is extremely dangerous.

It's safe if I only have a little bit of garlic.

Then it just makes me loopy. But that's not nearly as dangerous as a Van

Helsing.

Lucky for you, I'm the only Van Helsing around, and I'm not dangerous.

Unless all this real is a threat to me.

I think we'll be okay.

Woo, hear that?

That's hard.

Wilson Hall, let's get it.

Okay,

let's go.

Crunch time, lunch time, hit them with a punch line.

MC's waiting to be served like the lunch line. Front line, I'm fleeing from the

cafeteria. Jumping on these fools like an aircraft carrier.

Kick rocks when the beat drops.

Harmonizing with the lunch box, beat box.

Crew pressure, there's some locks from a pickle shop.

About to have a dance party on the table top.

Ah, it's all show and tell. We're gonna rock these bricks to the home run bell.

I'm a made freshman at the top of your list. Hot sauce at the back, hit them

with a chef's kiss.

Yo E, hit them with a chef's twist.

Got my lunch money sitting on my wrist.

Feel hungry and I'm looking for a snack.

It's a wrap when it comes to the rap.

Yeah, chef's kiss.

Uh -huh, chef's kiss.

Yeah, chef's kiss.

It's a wrap when...

Does the dean know you're having a dance party in here?

Mariah? Wow, who is she? And why do I suddenly want her approval?

It's my sister.

Sister? As in Van Helsing's sister?

Mariah! It's time to go.

Don't worry, Sophie.

I've been blending in just fine. I got this.

Hey, bruh.

I'm not done.

Try sharing a bathroom with her for ten years.

What are you doing here?

Wow, miss me much?

I'm substitute teaching at Wilson for a while.

Isn't that great?

Yes!

I mean, I know you weren't talking to me, but I'm very excited.

I was hoping you'd be excited, too.

Be honest.

You're here to spy on me for Mom.

I knew she wasn't cool with me switching my classes.

No, that isn't it.

I've been traveling the world. We haven't seen each other in ages.

I just wanted to spend some time with my dear brother.

All right, I miss you, too.

Oh, and your baby brother's tall.

Ooh, Mariah.

I love your bracelet.

Thanks, I made it. Here.

Now it's yours.

Oh, no, I couldn't.

But I will.

Mariah, let me introduce you to the cool people.

Well, you haven't changed.

Thank you.

I'm definitely going to be borrowing that bracelet.

It's not silver, so it won't burn me.

Who knew a Van Helsing could be so cool?

Hello?

I'm right here.

But I'm guessing your super cool sister won't be super cool about me being a

vampire. Not a chance.

Seriously.

Mariah's one of the best slayers in the family. You need to be careful around

her. Don't worry. I practice blending in with humans now. Watch this.

Sup, dude?

Catch the sports ball game?

I heard Mariah is subbing our movement class.

I hope she likes my outfit. I wanted to say, I woke up like this.

But it's totally giving I slept in this.

It just needs a final touch.

Here.

Buy my jacket.

I'm not sure you're getting this bag.

You can keep it.

If you help me hide from dummies that there's a new van helping at the school.

Deal.

What's up?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing is going on.

Zip, and it's mine.

Okay, let's get to class.

You don't have to go to class with us. You're not actually enrolled.

My application got kicked back. I forgot to lie about my age and I wrote my

essay on parchment.

But you deserve to figure out what you want to do.

You've lived so many lives for others.

Live this afterlife for yourself somewhere far, far away from us today.

In other words, do you, Boom?

You know what?

You're right.

It's finally... Boo's turn.

Oh, Mozart.

So big.

Also, weirdly tiny feet.

Right along opening act, the headliner's here.

Oh, pal, for the queen of me. Her crown is made of lip gloss.

rehearsal time.

Not according to the sign -in sheet. It's an unwritten rule.

Well, next time, write it down.

I know you.

You're V's friend.

And I know you.

You're Elijah's friend.

Against all logic.

Well, get out. I'm practicing my skills.

I'm practicing my skills, too.

Okay.

Your suit.

It's acceptable.

Queen, I love your jacket.

Great material.

Thank you. I slept like this.

I mean, I woke up like this.

Most of the world sees theater kids as weak and defenseless.

Most of us are okay with that.

Well, I'm not.

So, I'm adapting your intro to movement class into capoeira training.

I love capoeira.

What's capoeira?

It's an Afro -Brazilian martial art. Our family has practiced it for hundreds of

years. Ooh, your new atabaki drum's sick.

Yeah, it's one of a kind. A Capoeira master gave it to me while I was living

Brazil. He also proposed, but I'm more of a city girl.

You're so cool.

Yo, you wouldn't think my sister was so special if you ever saw her sneeze face.

Okay, funny boy.

You can be my first volunteer.

Let's see if your feet are as quick as your mouth.

Your reflexes have really improved since the last time we sparred. I was five

and you took my cookie.

I don't play when it comes to my snickerdoodles.

All right, who's next?

I will sacrifice myself for the good of the class.

Okay, drama.

Bring it.

What are you doing? If you use your powers, she'll figure you out. I won't.

blending, remember?

But I don't want her to think I'm a weak theater kid.

Again, still okay with it.

Depends. How does Mariah look?

I think I'm seeing your sneeze face.

Need help unpacking?

No, please. I enjoy doing absolutely everything.

Think fast.

Okay, okay, fine.

Get your point. I'll help.

Your skills are unbelievable.

I can't imagine what you'll be like once you start training.

Not sure that's going to happen, sis.

I'm exploring a different path.

That's why I'm here at Wilson.

It's a great school.

Oh, it is. Just not a great school for a Van Helsing. Mom thinks that... Aha!

I knew you were spying for her. Oh, okay.

Yes. We both feel like you're losing your way. You have to be prepared.

Vampires can be anywhere, even here.

Seriously?

You honestly think there's a vampire at Wilson Hall trying to become a teenage

pop star?

That sounds more like a TV show than real life.

I'm sure these flowers are a good way to apologize to Mariah for breaking her

drum. I mean, they're still alive.

Gross.

She'll love them.

I hope she loves me too.

Cool tour.

Maybe she'll ask if we can hang out. I bet her place smells like sandalwood and

adventure.

Sophie, you know I can't go into a Van Helsing's lair.

First, I'd have to be formally invited in.

Second, I'd have to be crazy.

Just dropping these off.

I thought I heard someone lurking out here. What are you guys doing?

I brought you flowers. We did.

To apologize for breaking your drum.

Aw, that's so sweet.

Oh, Elijah and I were just about to have dinner. Your girl's hungry?

Uh, do you want to see here?

In your lair? I mean apartment?

Yeah, why not?

What are you waiting for?

One more invitation?

No, not me. You, Sophie? Nope. I like it casual.

Casual cool.

Oh, hi, guys.

Did I hear you're staying for dinner?

Please, come in.

Make yourselves comfortable.

I'll be right back.

Thanks for inviting me in. I was so scared my heart almost started beating.

Don't worry. I'll take care of any vampire -specific stuff.

Eat fat.

This dinner could be a bigger disaster than the Thanksgiving fiasco of 2021.

There was gravy everywhere.

Here's some boba tea.

Thank you.

Everything is so beautiful. I love these cups.

Thanks, they're pure silver.

Oh, I can tell.

Uh, uh, Mariah, look what I can do. Ready?

Your fingers are on fire.

I'll heal them.

Good job, buddy.

Sure, that's worth $40 ,000 a year.

Get out! Yeah!

It's an unwritten rule that this is our time!

Huh. You took the words right out of my mouth.

Maybe we can hang out.

I have a better option.

Hello, Elijah.

Hello?

Hello? Mmm, my first time having boba tea.

Yummy.

I love a drink you can chew.

Elijah Butt called me. He went for boba tea with me and Sophie. And they didn't

invite me?

I like boba tea.

Probably.

Me too.

Elijah's supposed to be my... boba buddy.

Hello? Jump, pick up your butt.

Oh, uh, hey, Brit didn't mean to call you by.

I can't believe they're all having boba together.

Without a... Oh, no.

You know what this means?

You and I are the side friends.

Side friends?

That ramen looks delicious.

Do I smell garlic?

I still taunt you, but that sneeze was straight up disgusting.

You can use my room to clean up and borrow some clothes.

Thanks. I promise I won't snoop around much.

Hey, Elijah, I need your help in the kitchen.

Uh, sure.

Be right back.

I have to show you something in our vampire book.

Why?

I told you there aren't any vampires at Wilson.

And I told you they could be anywhere, and I was right.

There's a vampire in my apartment right now.

What? What?

I know V really well, and there's no way she's a vampire.

I'm not talking about V.

The vampire is Sophie.

Mom was so right to send me here.

This is it, Elijah.

Your first time vanquishing a vampire.

You ready?

No. There will be no vanquishing a vampire because Sophie is not a vampire.

Look here.

Her jacket is lined in a Transylvanian twill, a rare fabric only made by

vampires. She needed an invitation to enter, didn't touch the silver cup, then

sneezed in the garlic ramen to avoid eating it.

And you call all that proof?

Yes. Get on board, brother.

The vanquishing has already begun.

Well, unbegun it. Too late.

I put garlic in the boba tea.

Your vampire friend is about to start to die.

Oh, that's my brownie.

They put garlic in them, too.

I heard everything.

We gotta protect Sophie.

What about you? You had garlic. Who do I call? Dr. Frankenstein? Dr. Jekyll? Dr.

Doolittle? The guy who talks to animals?

You are a bad half the time.

Luckily, I didn't drink much boba, so I'm not gonna turn to dust.

But I may have some minor side effects.

Like the loopiness?

Yes, but I know how to handle my garlic.

You'll never notice anything.

I'm noticing something.

likes your voice.

And I've only said that to one other person.

My godmother, Beyonce.

You should join my a cappella group.

Sure. But to be clear, while our voices are friends, I'm still not sure if I

like you.

Same here.

But I don't dislike you.

Just promise me one thing.

Don't fall in love with me.

Uh, I promise.

They always do.

Me? Please try to keep it together.

Boba.

Boba!

Boba's a funny word.

I've got brownies!

Brownies!

The weak feeder can now.

Not today, demon.

Sophie, put that back.

Sorry. Didn't mean to snoop.

Sheesh.

Give me my steak. This is over.

These are my friends. They're not a threat.

Damn, man.

Seriously?

This is exactly why Mom is concerned.

You have lost your way.

You need to get your priorities in order and focus on what's important.

Not this silly school.

We object!

This is not a silly school.

And Elijah has real talents.

Wilson Hall will only make him better.

It's your priorities that are out of order.

I mean, come on.

What's more important than your brother's happiness?

Nothing.

Right, Sophie?

Well, I told you so. This is it. Yo, stay back. Don't inhale vampire dust.

Woo!

Girl, looky.

Wait, wait.

You're okay?

Yeah.

Why is everyone looking at me?

Is it the outfit?

Yes! You are serving, diva.

I guess I was wrong.

Yep. No vampires here.

Just two totally normal, slightly cringe teenage girls.

I'll catch up with you

guys later.

Not so loud.

I'm sorry tonight didn't go as well as I planned.

Let's do it again soon.

Definitely.

Never.

were a vampire and tried to destroy you. What?

Man, never meet your heroes.

But I'm keeping the jacket.

Mom's calling.

I'll call her back later.

What are you going to say?

Elijah... Did you know that when I was your age, I really wanted to go to art

school, but I couldn't because of Slayer training.

I didn't know that.

That's not fair.

I agree.

And your giddy little friend is right. Your happiness does matter, which is why

I'm going to reassure Mom it's okay to let you stay here.

Yes, thank you. But I'll only do it if you promise to start your official

training with me.

You are too special to let your Van Helsing abilities go to waste.

It's not like I have a choice.

Deal.

Then let's get to work, because you have got... Yeah, yeah, I know. I've got a

legacy to fulfill.

And vampires to slay.