Original subtitles

♪ Slay! ♪

Come on, share! I share my candied maggots with you.

And I wish you wouldn't.

This is a garlic roll.

Which for you is extremely dangerous.

It's safe if I only have a little bit of garlic.

Then it just makes me loopy.

Besides, it's not nearly as dangerous as a Van Helsing.

Lucky for you, I'm the only Van Helsing around,

and I'm not dangerous.

[scoffs] Unless all this rizz is a threat to vamps.

I think we'll be okay.

[♪ drums beating]

Ooh, hear that?

That's hard. Wilson Hall, let's get it!

♪ Uh, okay, let's go ♪

♪ Crunch time, lunch time

hit 'em with a punch line ♪

♪ MC's waiting to be served

like the lunch line ♪

♪ Front line, opps fleeing

from the cafeteria ♪

♪ Jumping on these fools

like an aircraft carrier ♪

♪ Kicks rocks

when the beats drops ♪

♪ Harmonizing

with the lunchbox, beatbox ♪

♪ Crew fresher than some

lox from a bagel shop ♪

♪ Boutta have a dance party

on the tabletop ♪

♪ Ahh, it's called

show and tell ♪

♪ We're gonna

rock these breaks

till the home room bell ♪

♪ I'm a made freshman

at the top of your list ♪

♪ Hot sauce out the bag

hit 'em with a chef's kiss ♪

♪ Yo E, hit 'em

with the chef's twist ♪

♪ Got my lunch money

sitting on my wrist ♪

♪ Still hungry

and I'm looking for a snack ♪

♪ It's a wrap

when it comes to the raps ♪

♪ Yeah, chef's kiss ♪

♪ Uh-huh, chef's kiss ♪

♪ Yeah, chef's kiss ♪

♪ It's a wrap when... ♪

Does the dean know you're having a dance party in here?

Moriah?

Wow. Who is she, and why do I suddenly want her approval?

-That's my sister. -Sister?

As in a Van Helsing sister?

-[Britney] Moriah! Hi. -Vee, it's time to go.

Don't worry, Sophie.

I've been blending in just fine. I got this.

[students cheering]

Hey, bruh.

-I'm not dead. -What?

-Now let's crank that bop back up! -[♪ music continues]

♪ Slay! ♪

♪ S-L-A-Y ♪

♪ Stepping out

into the light ♪

♪ I have never felt so alive ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ S-L-A-Y ♪

♪ Watch me

shine, shine, shine ♪

♪ Slay! ♪

[♪ upbeat music playing]

Ayy!

Whoo! You theater kids know how to party.

Elijah, introduce me to your friends.

I'm Vee, and this is Sophie.

I'm a big fan!

Try sharing a bathroom with her for ten years.

What are you doing here?

Wow, miss me much?

I'm substitute teaching at Wilson for a while. Isn't that great?

Yes!

I mean, I know you weren't talking to me,

but I'm very excited.

And I was hoping you'd be excited too.

Be honest. You're here to spy on me for Mom.

I knew she wasn't cool with me switching my classes.

No, that isn't it.

I've been traveling the world and we haven't seen each other in ages.

I just wanted to spend some time with my baby brother.

All right, I missed you too.

Oh, and... [clears throat] your baby brother is taller than you.

Ooh, Moriah, I love your bracelet.

Thanks, I made it. Here,

now it's yours.

Oh, no, I couldn't.

But I will.

Moriah! Let me introduce you to the cool people!

Well, you haven't changed.

Thank you.

I'm definitely gonna be borrowing that bracelet.

It's not silver, so it won't burn me.

Who knew a Van Helsing could be so cool?

Hello? I'm right here.

But I'm guessing your super cool sister

won't be super cool about me being a vampire?

Not a chance. Seriously,

Moriah's one of the best slayers in the family.

You need to be careful around her.

Don't worry.

I've practiced blending in with humans now. Watch this.

'Sup, dude?

You catch the sports ball game?

I heard Moriah is subbing our movement class.

I hope she likes my outfit.

I want it to say, "I woke up like this,"

but it's totally giving "I slept in this."

It just needs a final touch.

Here, borrow my jacket.

[gasps]

I'm not sure you're getting this back.

You can keep it.

If you help me hide from Demi that there's a new Van Helsing at the school.

-Deal. -[knocking at door]

-What's up? -Nothing.

Absolutely nothing is going on!

Zip, and it's mine.

Okay...

Let's get to class.

Demi, you don't have to go to class with us.

You're not actually enrolled.

My application got kicked back.

I forgot to lie about my age and I wrote my essay on parchment.

But you deserve to figure out what you want to do.

You've lived so many lives for others,

live this afterlife for yourself.

Somewhere far, far away from us today.

In other words,

do you, boo.

You know what?

You're right!

It's finally Boo's turn!

[♪ playing piano]

Ugh. Mozart.

So basic.

Also, weirdly tiny feet.

Run along, opening act.

The headliner's here.

All bow, for the Queen of Mean.

Her crown is made of lip gloss and spite.

This is my rehearsal time.

Not according to the sign-in sheet.

It's an unwritten rule.

Well, next time, write it down.

I know you.

You're Vee's friend.

And I know you. You're Elijah's friend.

Against all logic.

Well, get out!

I'm practicing my scales.

I'm practicing my scales too.

♪ Do, re ♪

♪ Mi, fa ♪

♪ So, la, ti ♪

♪ Do ♪

Your voice... it's...

okay.

Yours too.

It's acceptable.

Queen,

I love your jacket.

Great material.

Thank you! I slept like this.

I mean, I woke up like this.

Okay.

Okay, okay, everybody, please, please form a circle.

Most of the world

sees theater kids as weak and defenseless.

-Most of us are okay with that. -[chuckles]

Well, I'm not.

So, I'm adapting your Intro to Movement class into Capoeira training.

I love Capoeira!

What's Capoeira?

It's an Afro-Brazilian martial art.

Our family has practiced it for hundreds of years.

Ooh. Your new Atabaque drum's sick.

Yeah, it's one of a kind.

A Capoeira Master gave it to me when I was living in Brazil.

He also proposed, but I'm more of a city girl.

You're so cool.

Yo, you wouldn't think my sister was so special if you ever saw her sneeze face.

Okay, funny boy,

you can be my first volunteer.

Let's see if your feet are as quick as your mouth.

[♪ upbeat music playing]

-[Elijah grunts] -[gasps]

[sighs]

[Elijah sighs]

Your reflexes have really improved since the last time we sparred.

I was five and you took my cookie.

I don't play when it comes to my snickerdoodles.

All right, who's next?

I will sacrifice myself for the good of the class!

Okay, drama.

Bring it.

[gasps] What are you doing?

If you use your powers, she'll figure you out.

I won't. I'm blending, remember?

Plus, I don't want her to think I'm a "weak theater kid."

Again, still okay with it.

[grunts]

[Vee yells]

[groaning]

Vee, are you okay?

Do you need help getting out?

Depends. How does Moriah look?

[inaudible]

I think I'm seeing her sneeze face.

Need help unpacking?

No, please. I enjoy doing absolutely everything.

Think fast!

Ooh.

Okay, okay, fine!

I get your point, I'll help.

Your skills are unbelievable.

I can't imagine what you'll be like once you start training.

Ooh. Not sure that's gonna happen, sis.

See, I'm exploring a different path.

That's why I'm here at Wilson. It's a great school.

Oh, it is. Just not a great school for a Van Helsing.

-Mom thinks-- -Aha!

I knew you were spying for her!

Oh, okay, yes.

We both feel like you're losing your way.

You have to be prepared,

vampires could be anywhere. Even here.

Seriously?

You honestly think there's a vampire at Wilson Hall

trying to become a teenage pop-star?

That sounds more like a TV show than real life.

[laughs]

Are you sure these flowers are a good way to apologize

to Moriah for breaking her drum?

I mean, they're still alive. Gross.

She'll love them. I hope she loves me, too.

Cool door.

Maybe she'll ask if we can hang out.

I bet her place smells like sandalwood and adventure.

Sophie, you know I can't go into a Van Helsing's lair.

First, I'd have to be formally invited in.

Second, I'd have to be crazy.

We're just dropping these off.

[both scream]

Well, I thought I heard someone lurking out here.

What are you guys doing?

I brought you flowers--

We did.

To apologize for breaking your drum.

Aw, that's so sweet.

Oh, Elijah and I were just about to have dinner. You girls hungry?

Uh, you want us to eat here?

In your lair-- I mean, apartment?

Yeah, why not?

What are you waiting for?

A formal invitation?

[chuckles] No. Not me. You, Sophie?

Nope, I like it casual. Casual cool.

Oh, hi, guys. Did I hear you're staying for dinner?

Please, come in!

Make yourselves comfortable.

I'll be right back.

[sighs]

Thanks for inviting me in.

I was so scared my heart almost started beating.

Don't worry, I'll take care of any vampire-specific stuff.

Eat fast, this dinner could be a bigger disaster

than the Thanksgiving fiasco of 2021.

Oy, there was gravy everywhere.

Here's some boba tea.

Thank you. Everything is so beautiful. I love these cups.

Thanks, they're pure silver.

Oh, I can tell.

Uh, uh, Moriah, look what I can do! Ready?

Your fingers are on fire!

I'll heal them.

Good job, buddy.

Sure that's worth 40,000 a year.

[♪ playing piano]

Get out!

Yeah! It's an unwritten rule that this is our time!

[door closes]

Huh, you took the words right out of my mouth.

Maybe we can hang out.

[phone ringing]

Elijah? Never mind, I have a better option.

Hello, Elijah.

Hello?

Hello?

Mmm. My first time having boba tea.

Yummy.

I love a drink you can chew.

Elijah butt called me!

He went for boba tea with Vee and Sophie.

And they didn't invite me?

I like boba tea.

Probably.

Me, too.

Elijah is supposed to be my boba buddy.

[Britney] Hello? Elijah,

pick up your butt!

Oh, uh, hey, Brit, didn't mean to call you. Bye.

I can't believe they're all having boba together without us.

Oh, no. You know what this means?

You and I are the...

side friends.

[gasps]

Side friends?

[♪ plays dramatic tune]

Mmm. That ramen looks delicious.

Do I smell garlic?

I do!

Oops.

Oh, I'm so sorry I spilled on you.

But that sneeze was straight-up disgusting.

You can use my room to clean up and borrow some clothes.

Thanks, I promise I won't snoop around... Much.

Hey, Elijah, I need your help in the kitchen.

Uh, sure.

Be right back, Vee.

I have to show you something in our vampire book.

Oh!

[coughs] Why? I told you there aren't any vampires at Wilson.

And I told you they could be anywhere.

And I was right.

There's a vampire in my apartment right now.

-[gasps] -What? [clears throat] What?

I know Vee really well and there's no way she's a vampire.

I'm not talking about Vee.

The vampire is Sophie.

Mom was so right to send me here.

This is it, Elijah.

Your first time vanquishing a vampire. You ready?

No! There will be no vanquishing a vampire!

Because Sophie is not a vampire!

Look here.

Her jacket was lined in a Transylvanian twill,

a rare fabric only made by vampires.

She needed an invitation to enter,

didn't touch the silver cup,

then sneezed in the garlic ramen to avoid eating it.

And you call all that proof?

Yes. Get on board, brother.

The vanquishing has already begun.

Well, un-begun it.

Too late. I put garlic in the boba tea.

Your vampire friend is about to turn to dust!

-[microwave dings] -Ooh.

That's my brownies.

They've got garlic in them, too.

[Vee grunts]

I heard everything!

This is all my fault.

We gotta protect Sophie!

What about you? You had garlic! Who do I call?

Dr. Frankenstein? Dr. Jekyll? Dr. Doolittle?

The guy who talks to animals?

You are a bat half the time.

Luckily I didn't drink much boba, so I'm not gonna turn to dust.

But I may have some minor side effects.

Like the loopy-ness?

Yes, but I know how to handle my garlic.

You'll never notice anything.

[Vee chuckles]

[gasps] Look, I got two of 'em.

[squeals]

Yeah. [clears throat]

I'm noticing something.

♪ I'm just a superstar ♪

♪ Singing the diva blues ♪

♪ Oh, I'm a superstar ♪

♪ Singing the big time

diva blues ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Ohh ♪

♪ Just give me

that spotlight ♪

♪ I'll put on my diva shoes ♪

♪ Ooh, yeah ♪

Demi.

You know, my voice really likes your voice.

And I've only said that to one other person...

My godmother Beyonce.

You should join my a cappella group.

Sure!

But, to be clear,

while our voices are friends,

I'm still not sure if I like you.

Same here.

But... I don't dislike you.

Just promise me one thing.

Don't fall in love with me.

Uh...

I promise.

[Demi] They always do!

Vee, please try to keep it together.

Boba.

Boba! [giggles]

Boba's a funny word.

I've got brownies!

♪ Brownies ♪

[squeals]

Who's a weak theater kid now?

Not today, demon!

Moriah, enough!

Sophie, put that back.

Sorry. Didn't mean to snoop.

Sheesh.

Give me my stake.

This is over. These are my friends. They're not a threat.

Ooh, they're mad.

Seriously?

This is exactly why Mom is concerned.

You have lost your way.

You need to get your priorities in order and focus on what's important...

Not this silly school.

We object.

This is not a silly school,

and Elijah has real talent.

Wilson Hall will only make him better.

It's your priorities that are out of order.

I mean, come on. What's more important than your brother's happiness?

Nothing.

Right, Sophie?

[coughs]

Aha! See, bro, I told you so. This is it.

Yo, stay back. Don't inhale vampire dust.

Whoo!

Garlic-y.

-Wait, wait. You're okay? -Yeah.

Why is everyone looking at me?

Is it the outfit?

Yes! [chuckles]

You are serving, diva!

I guess I was wrong.

Yep. No vampires here.

Just two totally normal, slightly cringe teenage girls.

Ah, ah, ah.

I'll catch up with you guys later.

Not so loud.

I'm sorry tonight didn't go as well as I'd planned.

Let's do it again soon.

Definitely.

Never.

That was actually really fun!

Are you kidding?

Moriah thought you were a vampire and tried to destroy you!

What? Man, never meet your heroes.

But I'm keeping the jacket.

[phone ringing]

Mom's calling.

Look, I'll call her back later.

What are you gonna say?

Elijah... Did you know,

that when I was your age, I really wanted to go to art school,

but I couldn't because of slayer training.

I didn't know that. That's not fair.

I agree. And your giddy little friend is right.

Your happiness does matter.

Which is why I'm gonna reassure Mom it's okay to let you stay here.

-Yes! Thank you! -But...

I'll only do it if you promise to start your official slayer training with me.

You are too special to let your Van Helsing abilities go to waste.

It's not like I have a choice.

[sighs] Deal.

Then let's get to work, because you have got--

Yeah, yeah. I know.

I've got a legacy to fulfill.

And vampires to slay.